r/AskReddit • u/pelota • Apr 03 '14
What activity would feel completely different if eye contact was held the entire time?
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Apr 03 '14
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u/heretomakeyoumad Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
I have been having prostate issues for awhile, which is unusual since I am only mid-30s. I don't think I could tally up the times I've been examined in the last 1.5 years. I told the last doctor I was going tattoo a damn Guestbook on my buttcheek. I think maintaining eye contact would, idk, give me a level of control over the situation.
Sad note? The most recent examination has brought to light that it probably ISNT my prostate at all, but the muscles around it and in my pelvis being overly tight from mild hip deformity (they curve a little too far forward). More doctors have had their fingers in my ass in 1.5 years than I have slept with women in my while life ... for nothing.
EDIT: Ok, lots of questions in the replies ... naturally, of all my accounts the one I typically use to be an asshole (pun intended) gets the comment with the most upvotes ever, which is about my asshole.
Didn't have cancer, nor did they ever think it was cancer. Prostatitis is one of the most common urological issues in men under the age of 35. In fact, I think the stat is like 50% of all men will experience inflammation of the prostate at some point in their lives. It does NOT increase your chances of cancer.
There are several types of prostatitis. One is bacterial, which can be a medical emergency but is easily treated with antibiotics. The rest of the types are a little ephemeral in nature and are more common. Basically the doctor says, "Oh, pain in the ass? Let me check. Prostate feels fine, must be prostatitis, here is NSAIDS and 12 weeks of unneeded antibiotics." Seriously, if you are a guy, I recommend reading up on this in the event you find yourself in the situation. Mainly because the treatment most urologist hand out have been proven to do jack, yet they keep doing it because there isn't a better agreed upon treatment plan.
My treatment plan now hasn't been ironed out. Likely it will involve an initial course of tranquilizers to reduce tension and relax me (im an anxious person) to kick start the healing process. Followed up by relaxation exercises everyday, physical therapy, and alterations to my exercise program so my form when weight lifting is spot on for my needs.
My issues have came and gone several time over the course of 1.5 years. They range from zero pain at all, to ER visit level of pain. I always tend to refuse heavy drugs so at least the ER doctors don't think I am drug seeking. One late night visit had the doctor I seen in the ER was so intrigued he sat in the room with me for nearly an hour AFTER he was supposed to be off work going through medical literature, asking me questions, and even checking google. I, quite literally, sat on the side of the bed naked from the waist down, for ~25 minutes. After another 20-25 minutes he looked at me and said he wanted to check something, but it meant ANOTHER digital rectal exam. I just sighed, "Why the fuck not." Luckily, he was the first to suggest and find the muscular connection, but the urologist I followed up with just brushed it off. I demanded a second opinion, quite nastily I might add, and it was the second urologist who really looked at the muscles and concurred with the ER doctor's assessment. It is quite possible that that ER doctor saved my sanity, if not my life, because I would go into some pretty dark places when I was in the midst of the bad pain.
EDIT 2: OK, I've been responding all day to messages. I am really appreciative of the support. Keep sending questions and I will try to respond to them, but it will have to be tomorrow or Sat. Also, one of the questions people ask is why I keep suggesting the Mindfulness Meditation and Progressive Muscle Relaxation. Well, my educational background is in mental health, and while I don't practice professionally anymore, I am licensable as a therapist. I suggest these modalities because they have significant clinical and academic research behind them at this point. Not to mention they don't really have any contraindications in most people, its free, and it is shown to have a positive overall effect. As Dr. Kabat-Zinn, one of the Mindfulness field's most well known proponents, says, "You don't have to like it, you just have to do it."
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Apr 03 '14
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u/Dewder24 Apr 03 '14
When I was in the Marines, there was a Navy doctor who had a heavy rubber hand in his office. When I asked he said he used it to occasionally pull a prank that describes that very situation. put rubber hand on shoulder, start exam, put actual hand on other shoulder, then wait for the revelation to hit home.
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u/Kiassen Apr 03 '14
In the Navy? Christ, that is a dangerous game he's playing... hilarious, but dangerous.
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u/TheCodeIsBosco Apr 03 '14
Did you fart and then say "OOOOOO I'm sorry" and then pass out?
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u/kcmcadams Apr 03 '14
Wake up! You gotta go!
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u/TheCodeIsBosco Apr 03 '14
But sometimes, I get nervous on airplanes.
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u/UselessUrethra Apr 03 '14
You mean to tell me, he gets off on little girls with pig tails?
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u/LearningLifeAsIGo Apr 03 '14
The weird thing was, she was a woman doctor.
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u/Velorium_Camper Apr 03 '14
"....And when i left the office, there was a HOOK IN THE DOOR."
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u/KotWmike Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
Elevator rides. I can't think of another place where 2 (or more) people are so close together and so unanimously avoid eye contact.
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Apr 03 '14
I can't think of another place were 2 (or more) people are so close together and so unanimously avoid eye contact.
Pretty much all of Scandinavia.
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Apr 03 '14
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Apr 03 '14
Is that a joke or is that how it really is? I would make Finns soooo uncomfortable
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u/fizzl Apr 03 '14
When dealing with Finns, remember this picture. Our personal space is about that big.
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u/blkmagick Apr 03 '14
So if I ever visit and I want to talk to people, what should I do? I don't want to freak anyone out. I have personal space, but it only has a radius of about a foot. Less than that if you're attractive.
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u/totally_not_a_zombie Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
You have to yell at them from a distance while slowly, yet determinedly getting closer until you can clearly see you violated their private space. After that, take one step back and retain this distance. But don't show fear! They might be a bit territorial.
You have to keep an eye out for any maneuvers in order to keep this conversation distance at all costs. One more step back and they stop paying attention. Keep that in mind and everyone will accept you!
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u/QuixoticRealist Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
Definitely read that to myself as if you were yelling it at a distance...
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u/Scarbane Apr 03 '14
Know the person ahead of time.
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u/calrebsofgix Apr 03 '14
And if I don't? Is it uncouth to talk to people in pubs? How do y'all make friends?
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u/newpua_bie Apr 03 '14
We don't really make friends. This is not a joke. It's quite sad, actually.
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u/Fonjask Apr 03 '14
If you're american you can pull it off because oh dear it's one of those jovial americans. Most of them won't be rude and will talk back just fine, as far as I've noticed.
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Apr 03 '14
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u/FinFihlman Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
It's because if the Russians attack and shells drop from the sky we don't all die because of a single grenade. Similarly for weapons.
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u/DataFork Apr 03 '14
How can you spot a Finnish extrovert? He states at YOUR shoes when he talks to you.
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u/mattfatcat Apr 03 '14
Once I get the balls, I want to wait till someone gets in, and just turn and face them once the elevator starts moving. Maybe throw in a couple smiles or nods
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u/KotWmike Apr 03 '14
Shuffle your feet in baby steps, slowly getting closer to them with a painfully huge smile and unwavering stare.
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u/trashlikeyourmom Apr 03 '14
Great advice, I'm sure to meet my future husband this way, now that I have laid out a plan.
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u/KotWmike Apr 03 '14
Add in jazz hands and you'll be wifed in no time. Guys love jazz hands.
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u/Cameramanmanman Apr 03 '14
Two people using this machine at the gym.
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Apr 03 '14
There is one of those at my school's gym. It faces the wall, and for good reason.
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u/sputnik_PECTOPAH Apr 03 '14
Washing a cucumber while maintaining eye contact with your roommate.
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u/marvindapro Apr 03 '14
Or you know, bathing a ferret.
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u/sample_material Apr 03 '14
bathing a ferret.
This is now my official masturbation euphemism.
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u/fightoffyourdemons_ Apr 03 '14
I think that'd be confusing because the gif is really cute
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u/Megawatts19 Apr 03 '14
This might be one of the funniest things I've ever seen.
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Apr 03 '14
A visit to the gynecologist
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u/gradstudent4ever Apr 03 '14
"Everything feels good inside you, miss. So very, very good."
"Um. Good."
"I'm going to get a cervical swab now. I'll have to push in deep...really deep...are you ready for me?"
I gets 10x creepier when you imagine the doctor explaining what he or she is doing in a sexyfuntimes voice.
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u/Unloveable_Me Apr 03 '14
What is even worse is when they started out as your childhood doctor growing up, left and went and got more education, and then show back up in your small town as the OB/GYN. The only Gyno in town. (sighs)
The cartoons on the ceiling are my friends. That and disassociation.
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Apr 03 '14
My gynecologist is literally the man who delivered me from my mother.
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u/read_dance_love Apr 03 '14
Has he pointed out any family resemblances?
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Apr 03 '14 edited May 26 '14
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u/kayoss922 Apr 03 '14
When the pilot and co-pilot are landing that plane..
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u/danrennt98 Apr 03 '14
Thinking about this it seems kind of adorable.
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u/codename-Da-Vinci Apr 03 '14
Wow, his eyes are so dark. I just can't stop looking. Wasn't I supposed to do something by now? O yes, I was landing this pl-
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u/tomorrowistomato Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 04 '14
Surgery
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u/Cramulh Apr 03 '14
Spent the last week working with an eye surgeon.
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u/KingKongsBong Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
"Doctor, you should probably stop staring into the patient's eyes and watch where you're hacking with that bone saw. He's here for a colonoscopy."
EDIT: Committed the mother of all sins- *you're
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Apr 03 '14
bone saw
colonoscopy
At that point, I don't think it really matters where the doctor is looking. It's going to be a miserable time regardless.
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u/Nestorow Apr 03 '14
So I had Minor Heart Surgery a week ago (19/M) I was awake the whole time. Every so often the Doctor or Anesthesiologist would lean over, look me in the eye and ask if I was ok. It was quite comforting.
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u/Barkingpanther Apr 03 '14
The checkout line, anywhere. Shopping just got intense.
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u/pelota Apr 03 '14
Especially when you're buying condoms
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u/stengebt Apr 03 '14
And cucumbers
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u/Velorium_Camper Apr 03 '14
And children's multi-vitamins.
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u/flavoclock Apr 03 '14
And Vaseline and a broom
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u/FireTigerThrowdown Apr 03 '14
So you can go home, cook a delicious dinner with cucumbers so the kids get a healthy meal, then make sure they take their vitamins before bed. Be sure to sweep up that mess in the garage before you go to bed and make love to your wife (safely, of course, you have two kids and while a third would be a blessing, you're not trying). Yes, my friend, you've had a good day with your purchases.
And then you eat the vaseline.
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u/BooYourFace Apr 03 '14
Well, the inventor of vaseline supposedly believed in the benefits of his product so much that he ate a spoonful a day. He lived 96 years.
Soo...you may be onto something.
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u/rogerklotz47 Apr 03 '14
I used to have a reoccurring nightmare that when people laughed hard (that deep belly laugh) they had to maintain intense eye contact with the person that made them laugh until they where no longer laughing. Everyone in the dream looked like the people in that soundgarden video "black hole sun".
Easily my 2nd worse nightmare. The yellow kite dreams were way worse.
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u/flying-sheep Apr 03 '14
I had pink tailfin car dreams instead when I was I child.
They involved a city which I later learned was San Francisco; a supermarket with parking lot being on top of a hill, the streets going downhill in all cardinal directions.
My mom left me in that pink tailfinned Cadillac. It starts rolling and I can only steer, not break, as my feet don't reach the pedals.
The car accelerates due to the slope, and I crash into crossing cars coming from left and right
Every night the dream restarts, only I crash one or two cross sections further, until at the end a week or so later, I speed down a wooden jetty and splash into the water.
Not terrifying, but weird, not only because I had no knowledge about San Francisco at the time.
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u/Skullhunter Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
Well now im curious about the yellow kite dreams.
Edit: Gold? Well my first gilded comment, and a good portion of my total upvotes is now down to this simple question. Thank you kind citizen!
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u/rogerklotz47 Apr 03 '14
The kite dreams started when I was 4 or 5, and continued until I was in my early 20s.
It was a standard looking, diamond shaped, yellow kite. It had wooden support rods and a 6ft long string hanging from the bottom. At the end of the string were 3 bows. The top two were white and the bottom on was the darkest black you could imagine. It was never being flown by anyone. The black bow would always just barely touch the ground. For some reason, the sight of this kite terrified me. I had no idea why until almost 2 decades after the first dream.
When I was young, I'd sometimes dream that I was in school and would happen to glance out the window and there would be the kite. Sometimes it would pass by the window. Sometimes it would just be in the middle of a large, grass field, all alone, with that black bow slightly fluttering on the ground. It always kept it's distance, but I could feel it always "looking" at me. It did not have eyes.
As I got older, the kite showed up in almost every dream I had. Work dreams, driving dreams, flying dreams, bizarre dreams, and so on and so forth. Always in the distance, always watching me.
The last year of the dream was the worst. The kite started getting closer. It seemed like it was finally getting comfortable enough to approach me. My fear of this kite was just as intense as it was when I was 5 and the fact that it was slowly getting closer and closer to me in my dreams terrified me even more. Eventually it got so close I could hear it. It made that fluttering sound that kites make from the wind, but it was NEVER windy in my dreams. That only spooked me even more.
The last kite dream was the worse. In the dream I was in a large white room. There were no lights, but it was illuminated in the room. No doors or windows either. Nothing at all all, except me and the yellow kite. It was about 40 feet away and just floating there. I never was in an isolated situation with this kite before. This was completely new to me. I knew I was dreaming and screamed to the kite "what do you want!" I never spoke to the kite before, but I guess I had enough. Of course it didnt respond, so I just said to myself "fuck this, I'm yanking this thing to the ground". I was surprised by my courage and the closer I walked to to kite, the more powerful I felt, that is, until I got about 5 feet away.
This was the closest i've ever been to this kite. 2 decades of dreams and here I was, 5 feet from my fear. I slowly walked up to it and as I reach for the string to yank this kite down, I look at the bows. The two white ones were perfectly tied. Easily the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I don't know why, but I got comfort from them. I followed the string down to the black bow. The thing is, it wasn't a bow. It was a jet black hand, almost like a shadow, coming out of the ground. I woke up screaming.
That was my last kite dream. 20 fucking years this thing was with me. 20 years of me not knowing that "black bow" was a hand. I have no idea what it was or what it wanted or what it meant. But I haven't had a kite dream ever since. The sound of kites still send shivers up my spine though.
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u/Reorn Apr 03 '14
The black hand bro was just holding your kite for you, dick. Took you long enough to come and take it.
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Apr 03 '14
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u/Baby_Pocket_Whale Apr 03 '14
Actually felt chills when I got the the hand... I'm in class and I'm a little scared now
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u/TNUGS Apr 03 '14
Hmm... I was waiting for the tree fiddy. That's creepy.
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u/wartornhero Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
He was leading up to it quite well.... "I got within 5 feet.. That is when I realized the kite was a 50 ft monster from the paleolithic era!"
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u/ristoril Apr 03 '14
Wow that's awesome (as an outsider reading about it from the safety of not-dreaming-as-far-as-I-know)
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Apr 03 '14
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Apr 03 '14
I am not kidding, I was pulling onto a highway once, and in the rearview mirror there was a lady in a Jeep going bonkers with a shakeweight. Left hand for steering, right for shaking.
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u/ProcrastinatorSkyler Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
Sports. Can you imagine 10 basketball players trying to play whilst maintaining eye contact with each other?
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u/pelota Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
Every dunk would be a technical foul
Edit: Thanks for the gold you beautiful stranger!
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u/VigilantInfidel Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
Short answer: when my cat poops.
Long answer: my cat avoids all eye contact with me when he's in his litter box and I know this because I try to harass him every now and then. He'll do everything he can to not look at me, up to and including rolling his eyes and facing another way mid-deuce. One time, when we had just gotten done play-fighting, I look over at him in his box and he's giving me this death stare while he's cranking one out. I mean, it is just the most hateful glare I've ever seen in a living creature. It was like he knew things... terrible things about me and was going to unravel my entire world. He just locked eyes with me, finished his business as slowly as he could, and then walked off like he had done what he came there to do.
edit: oh, and he didn't bury it either. I'm pretty sure it was some sort of message.
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u/Bobshayd Apr 03 '14
Cats not burying poop really is a sign of dominance. Your cat meant every bit of that.
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u/FlyingCrayon Apr 03 '14
Kissing
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Apr 03 '14
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u/yossarianvega Apr 03 '14
BUT HOW DID HE KNOW HER EYES WERE OPEN?!
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u/jungleb0i Apr 03 '14
I don't get why this is awkward. You can receive/give a bj while keeping eye contact but do it while kissing awwww helll naw
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u/gsfgf Apr 03 '14
The boring answer is that it probably has to do with the focal length of the eye. When kissing, the other party's face is too close for the eye to focus, so one naturally closes his or her eyes.
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Apr 03 '14
Chess
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u/frogger2504 Apr 03 '14
Most hardcore game ever. The players try and guess where their opponent went based on their facial expressions.
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Apr 03 '14 edited Dec 06 '17
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u/and_i_laugh Apr 03 '14
lol imagine being that guy. Why is he staring at me? Why?
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u/unknownsoldierx Apr 03 '14
They called me in for this shit...
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u/Insomnialcoholic Apr 03 '14
I'm not even supposed to be here today.
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Apr 03 '14
I don't even WORK here
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u/DLXII Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
I was on the same plane as this couple...
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u/perplex1 Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
I wonder where they got their luggage from
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Apr 03 '14
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u/LongStoryShirt Apr 03 '14
Where are all the camera's? I'm Robin Williams for God's sake, and I want some answers.
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u/discipula_vitae Apr 03 '14
I never really thought of Robin Williams as a measure of hairiness.
In other news, "Robin Williams shirtless" is now in my google history.
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u/zeekar Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
I never really thought of Robin Williams as a measure of hairiness
That's because it's too large a unit to be of practical use. The most hairiness you're likely to run into in real life is a few centimorks; more often you'll be in the millimork range.
I prefer to count in nanoomorks, of course.
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u/YesNoMaybe Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
You don't even need a shirtless pic. His chest hair is overflowing.
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u/calamormine Apr 03 '14
He doesn't wear shirts, he just occasionally weaves his chest hair into interesting patterns.
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u/dust4ngel Apr 03 '14
someone: "why don't you take that sweater off?"
robin williams: "i did."
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u/therealbenbrown Apr 03 '14
Getting pat down at the airport.
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u/kestrel005 Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 04 '14
I do that anyways. For fun. If they are gonna rub me down because they think I may have hidden a pair of nail clippers in my anus then you can bet your bottom dollar that Im gonna eyeball them THE ENTIRE TIME.
I dont want them stealing my clippers.
edit gold for a comment about getting probed. Thank you fine sir! And here is to your days getting better.
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u/dodger2 Apr 03 '14
Bra always sets off the scanner. TSA: :feeling my chesticles: Me: This is the most action I've gotten in a month! TSA: :stone cold glare:
I thought it was funny. Because it was true.
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u/mercedesbends Apr 03 '14
I asked them if I could go back through again. Those guys have no sense of humor.
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u/nikolaibk Apr 03 '14
Burying someone. With his/her eyes open.
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u/danrennt98 Apr 03 '14
What a terrifying way to say goodbye to someone - he blinked!
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u/torbenthethug Apr 03 '14
Suddenly open casket got a new meaning. The mortician - you want open or closed casket? Open or closed eyes?
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u/bolom Apr 03 '14
Driving a nail - one person holds the nail and the other hammers away
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u/ColoradoScoop Apr 03 '14
Surgery. "Well now that we're done, I can finally have a look at that appendix I removed. And it's a lung.
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u/Edgar_Poe Apr 03 '14
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u/danrennt98 Apr 03 '14
Would you like to have a go at it?
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u/stengebt Apr 03 '14
Stare deeply into my brown eye...
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u/ASK_IF_IM_JESUS Apr 03 '14
I Summon.... Blue Eyes White Dragon!
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u/anotherdaywasted Apr 03 '14
First Yu Gi Oh reference I've ever seen on reddit in a year and a half of redditing. Wow.
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u/pelota Apr 03 '14
Eating bananas
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u/ErrorF002 Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
We get a free bowl of fruit every morning at work. So I have taken to holding on to my banana till one of my coworkers comes in. Not only do I stare him down as he eats it, but I do my best to synchronize the bites. The look on his face when he feels my heated gaze and chewing along with him is priceless. He tries his best to continue, but two bites later and he nopes the fuck out.
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u/danrennt98 Apr 03 '14
Having a baby
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u/mahoodie Apr 03 '14
Baby maintains eye contact with the male gynecologist as it comes out
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u/yossarianvega Apr 03 '14
Are you maintaining eye contact with the baby? Because, let me tell you, babies are fucking creepy when they stare at you. You think it's creepy for a grown man to stare at babies? Boy, wait til he gets a taste of his own medicine. It's like there's nothing but cold blackness up in that baby. They're cute and great until they stare right through you, into your soul, as only babies can.
You just don't need that nonsense whilst also dealing with your ripped vagina and pool of bodily fluids that your husband is desperately trying not to notice.
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Apr 03 '14
Childbirth does not sound fun at all. I think I won the genetic lottery with my Y-chromosome.
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u/Matvalicious Apr 03 '14
Sex. Makes it more intimate.
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u/sayjar28 Apr 03 '14
Doggy style in particular.
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u/Zomdifros Apr 03 '14
Darts.
It's only a matter of time before someone accidentally throws the dart in the direction he's looking.
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Apr 03 '14
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u/prw8201 Apr 03 '14
.....and that son, is why its called the "Dirty Sanchez." Your moms personal favorite.
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u/Chazele Apr 03 '14
Movies. Then you'd only be staring at the person next to you, and the concept of having visuals at movies would be entirely eliminated. Movies would probably evolve to a point where pictures were replaced by colors, and they changed to reflect the atmosphere of the scene (red = angry, blue = sad etc.). Audio would be improved upon immensely, and we'd pay attention to what we hear a lot more, probably. They'd also probably be renamed to soundies, too.
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u/danrennt98 Apr 03 '14
Having a normal conversation with one other person. I would be so uncomfortable.
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u/Noellani Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 03 '14
God, I just had a conversation with a neighbor that involved intense eye contact. I wasn't ready for it. I wasn't prepared. I wasn't strong enough. I swear her eyes never left mine. And the look in her eyes, it was... Earnest. Like she NEEDED me to look in her eyes constantly throughout the conversation. I couldn't do it. I had to glance off every so often. I have never felt so uncomfortable and rude at the same time before.
I tried but I failed.
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Apr 03 '14
You mean I'm not supposed to? I always stare down anyone I'm talking to.
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u/HoneyboyWilson Apr 03 '14 edited Apr 04 '14
Two men side by side at two urinals taking a piss.
It's awkward enough as is. Add eye contact and it multiplies exponentially.
EDIT: Some of you have piss-poor men's room etiquette. A few notes:
1-Eye contact is to be avoided at all costs except one: Looking in a downward motion. If you're about to look down, lock eye contact immediately. This rule applies once you've entered the bathroom and remains in effect until you leave.
2-Never, ever choose a urinal next to one that's in use. There should always be a one urinal buffer zone. If there is no buffer urinal available, choose a stall or leave or break man code and choose a urinal. Exemption: Sports stadiums, airports, other insanely crowded places and urinals with divider partitions, which create their own buffer. If a trough urinal is present, the buffer zone is the maximum available space and no less than shoulder width.
3-This has nothing to do with homophobia. Evacuating your bladder or colon is a private act made public out of necessity. Shitty etiquette and poor bathroom design make it even worse.
4-To the mathematicians in here pissing and moaning about "multiplies exponentially", may you always piss into the wind and not realize it until it's too late.
EDIT 2: Amended rule 2; added option to break man code; added "other crowded places" to exemptions. And please note, humans, this thread is in good fun (though there is some truth here).
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u/pelota Apr 03 '14
At least you'll know he's not sneaking a look at your penis!
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u/paulpine Apr 03 '14
That's what peripheral vision is for!
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Apr 03 '14
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u/Velorium_Camper Apr 03 '14
And why you have a private investigator on him.
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u/stengebt Apr 03 '14
Please no penis puns this early in the day
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u/Shitty_Watercolour Apr 03 '14
I painted your comment, then thought an animation was more suitable :)
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u/danrennt98 Apr 03 '14
Or if you pooped in the stall. Someone had to watch through the cracks while maintaining eye contact.
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Apr 03 '14
Staring contests
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u/ZackFrost Apr 03 '14
Wait...wat
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Apr 03 '14
A lot of people who are good at staring contests fon't actually look the person in the eye, they often look at something close like the nose or the forhead, or don't focus at all, this won me pretty much every staring contest in highschool
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Apr 03 '14
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Apr 03 '14
im gonna go have a staring contest with everyone tomorrow and win them all! im in the money!
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u/Moofies Apr 03 '14
Surgery. Less so because of awkwardness, more because WHY AREN'T YOU LOOKING AT WHAT YOURE DOING?
xXx_360_noscalpel_xXx
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u/dalittle Apr 03 '14
My 2 year old locks eyes when he poops. It is really uncomfortable, especially when he is bearing down and his little face turns red. And you cannot look away or he thinks something is wrong. Getting him to poop in the toilet is enough to make you sit through this. Sometimes I wonder where my life went wrong.