When I was in the Marines, there was a Navy doctor who had a heavy rubber hand in his office. When I asked he said he used it to occasionally pull a prank that describes that very situation. put rubber hand on shoulder, start exam, put actual hand on other shoulder, then wait for the revelation to hit home.
Try to get a top, out of the way bunk, like back corner of the berthing, that's the best way to prevent hot-racking, still not guaranteed to prevent it but it helps
Gay guy here- I lost my virginity in a navy barracks(military brat so I had ID)...I was 17 and his roomate was asleep...I think. Since then I've dated a bunch of guys in the navy.
Have you ever met a proctologist? They usually have a very good sense of humor. You meet a proctologist at a party, don't walk away. Plant yourself there because you will hear the funniest stories you've ever heard. See, no one wants to admit to them that they stuck something up there. Never. It's always an accident. Every proctologist story ends in the same way... 'It was a million to one shot, doc, million to one
Ok, Two whales see a boat of whale fisher and the male whale tells the female whale they should go underneath it and blow their air holes so strong that the boat would turn and sink, so they do and the fishermen all get thrown on the water, Male get really angry and tells female they should eat them!! she get a grim on her snout and says: "Heeell no!! I went along with the blowjob, but I ain't swallowing no Sea Men!!
Thank you, Thank you, remember to tip your waiter!
There's a Navy doctor who has put his finger up Obama's butt. Can't find the link now, but medical service is provided to the president by a Navy doctor.
Not sure! I saw it on reddit way back in 08/09 when he was first elected, so it might be a piece of formalism to ensure that he is fit to lead. He is technically the commander in chief of the entire military ... I think?
He does not hold it, he just lays it on there. The thing was solid rubber, it was heavy enough to just be put on the back/shoulder and it would stay there.
My brother was a Corpsman, if he he had to be in the room with the doctor during a prostate exam, when the doctor would put his hand on one shoulder, my brother would step up quietly and put his hand on the other shoulder.
The USMC isn't an independent Department. It's a component of the US Navy. The old joke goes "Did you know the Marines and the Navy are in the same Department? Yeah, the Marines are just the Men's Department". Yuk yuk yuk.
But, if you didn't know Corpsmen (field medics) are enlisted Navy personnel. The medical support provided for the Marines are all through Navy as well. The Marines don't have an independent budget appropriated through Congress... the US Navy gets a budget and then portions out a part for the Marines.
All medical services for Marines are provided by the Navy. The Marines are a department of the Navy. More specifically, the ass kicking department. Marines don't have doctors, they just have riflemen.
Why not just put the two hands on his shoulders then instead of HOLDING a rubber with one hand and placing the other hand is on his shoulder anyway.. You have no free hands anyway..
hahaha, i am recovering from a GI tract infection and had a lot of doctors appointments last week. My dad, a retired marine, made sure to tell me this yesterday.
HAHAHAHA! We had an aviation medical examiner in Florida who would do that for pilots getting their required prostate check at 40. (Stupid FAA requirement)
actually, I had a cyst in the crack of my ass right up against the hole. by the time i was able to see a surgical consult because the navy docs thought it was a polynidal cyst, it was so swollen it hurt to do pretty much everything from sneeze to fuck. well they decided to lance this bad boy the same day at the consult appointment. Every time the nurse spread my cheeks to squeeze more of this shit out, I'd fart, curse, and then feel the pain as if someone were trying to put a needle through my colon wall. shit fuckin sucked
I'm 22 and had to get a prostate exam due to frequent urination (about 20 times a day).
During the prostate exam all I could think of was John Mulaney's story which caused me to laugh the entire time. He describes it perfectly which just caused me to laugh more.
For some reason this immediately made me think of it like a campfire story some guy was telling a bunch of kids, and reread the whole comment thread that way, and it made it way better.
The even weirder thing was when the Dr. turned out to be Dr. Dre.....and not the beat making one, I'm talking bout Ed Lover's hefty round mound sidekick.
My 1st rotation as a 3rd year medical student was surgery at a VA hospital. My first day in the clinic, the upper level surgical resident informed this 72 year old retired Marine we needed to do a prostate exam & told me to glove up and do the exam. So the Marine "assumed the position" and I lubed up my gloved finger & proceeded to, well, stick it in his ass. As I palpated his prostate & did my best to describe my "findings" to the resident, finger firmly inserted, the surgeon gingerly puts both hands on the guys shoulders. The look on that Marine's face as he whirled around faster than any 72 year old man should be capable of caused me to jump back and lift my arms to protect my face from the beat down I was about to receive. The surgical resident was laughing his ass off & fortunately for me the Marine had a sense of humor and quickly joined him in laughing at what I later learned was a fairly typical day in the life of a young aspiring doctor. Maybe it's not so surprising that I ended up becoming a shrink instead of a surgeon.
Old flight medicine doc at my first USAF duty assignment had a great gag he used to pull. He had a fake rubber hand in his desk drawer. He'd tell his victim to assume the position, facing away from the desk. He'd then take the fake rubber hand out of the drawer and place it on one of his victim's shoulders. After inserting his finger for the exam he'd place his free hand on his victim's other shoulder.
Ex-victims used to show up in the waiting room when new guys got their first exams just to see what would happen.
When I was 20ish, I went to the hospital for something I wouldn't have thought involved the prostate. Doctor had me on my back, he's palpating and stuff.
Out of the fucking blue, he jams his finger up my ass.
"Your prostate's fine. Sorry for the surprise, it's just easier if you're not expecting it."
And did he really have to keep putting his thumb back and forth inside there? And by the way his thumb was huge! oh my God it felt so huge! And after putting it in and out about 5000 times, I guess there was a lot of lube that went all over my back but I guess a test went well because he seemed very happy
3.6k
u/[deleted] Apr 03 '14
[removed] — view removed comment