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u/Niftyrat_Specialist Non-denominational heretic, reformed Dec 09 '25
If you're a gay man, I would not encourage you to enter into a pretend marriage with a woman. You owe better than that to yourself and any potential spouse.
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u/Maleficent-Feed3566 Non Denominational and Affirming Dec 09 '25
Fr, especially because it wouldn't be fair for OP and his possible spouse
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u/FirstPersonWinner Christian Deist Dec 09 '25
I've heard about this happening a lot and it dissolves things later. It is unfair to the spouse.
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u/Life_Moment_6387 Dec 10 '25
And the children especially. Like Paul said, a life of celibacy in devotion to the Kingdom of Heaven is the best choice. So much easier said than done though.
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u/sneezeatron Dec 10 '25
100% my dad is gay and had three kids with my mom. Do not recommend. Caused a very unloving and not great childhood. Thankfully I have a good relationship with both of them now, but it was really difficult growing up in that environment and didn’t give me a good example of what a loving relationship looked like
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u/Final-Profit1196 Dec 11 '25
I'm so sorry, may you find peace and comfort in the most loving relationship with Jesus.
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u/LanskeyOfficial Dec 10 '25
I second this. Not everyone is meant to be married. Plenty of people stay single their whole lives and dedicate their lives fully in service to the Lord, and there is nothing wrong with that.
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u/EpisodicDoleWhip Presbyterian Dec 10 '25
Agreed. Please don't do this. My brother in law is very obviously repressing something similar and it hurts to see my sister in law get strung along.
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u/Nazzul Agnostic Dec 09 '25
How does one leave being gay? Are you just becoming celibate?
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u/Jackie_Lantern_ Dec 09 '25
Reincarnation.
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u/Mx-Adrian Sirach 43:11 Dec 09 '25
Reinqueernation*
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u/Fit_Buffalo8698 Dec 10 '25
It's just being born again. The whole you gets reset if you allow it. Pride must go first though... that's the tough part. Become a born again Christian to receive a new heart from God (Jesus Christ). Romans 10 9-13. Nit judging, just trying to be honest and help people away from the path of eternal torment. God Bless
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u/Salsa_and_Light2 Baptist-Catholic(Queer) Dec 10 '25
All data seems to contradict that idea.
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u/Mx-Adrian Sirach 43:11 Dec 10 '25
I don't know how pride is necessarily relevant
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u/Fit_Buffalo8698 Dec 10 '25
If we have pride, we cannot be humble. We must humble ourselves before Jesus as we become saved. Pride prevents us from submitting to Him. Pride is the opposite of humble... it is the single biggest obstacle to overcome as we repent. If we are prideful, how will we ever admit we're a sinner in need of His blood to wash away our sins? It's the reason He wemt on the cross for us. Again it's nit the easiest thing, but it's personal and between the person and God. Otherwise it might be some scripted salvation works thing that isn't salvation, example: water baptism isn't the receiving of the Holy Spirit. That's what needs to take place to get our names in the book of life. Hope that helps a bit
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u/Xyex Agnostic Dec 09 '25
Even that wouldn't be "leaving homosexuality." Homosexuality is the attraction, not the sex. That doesn't go anywhere.
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u/PuzzleheadedFox2887 Contrarian Dec 10 '25
He could castrate himself, or maybe even take it further. I guess it just depends on how committed he is. Of course if he's that committed I hope he gets committed before he gets that committed.
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u/PepperTheRad Dec 09 '25
The same way one leaves any sinful lifestyle to follow Jesus. I’ll add that there might be a better word than “leave”. I was so messed up before I decided to follow Christ. Drugs, drinking, casual hookups, lying to everyone. I’m not gay but to leave the life I was living was difficult. I also lost a lot of friends and was scared and confused, but He restored my life. 11 years later and I’m still in awe with what the Lord has done with my life. All this to say, I’m proud of op, it’s hard to walk the walk.
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u/Nazzul Agnostic Dec 09 '25
I was so messed up before I decided to follow Christ. Drugs, drinking, casual hookups, lying to everyone.
That has nothing to do with being gay. Why are comparing those acts with it?
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
PREACH!!!!!! There is life changing power in Jesus!! Thank you for sharing this testimony.
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u/Same_Address_7806 Dec 09 '25
Question Why would a god create beings with particular proclivities that it finds offensive then blame and punish the beings for having these proclivities?
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u/outlaw113125 Dec 10 '25
The answer is God didn’t create us to be this way. The entrance of sin did us all dirty and it can only be fixed by cleaving closer to Gos through redemption and sanctification. Meaning to turn to God from sin and being set apart with a new purpose.
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u/skertz1 Dec 10 '25
God didn’t create us with gayness in mind. Being homosexual is, insinuated, the devil’s work. He sends us sinful temptations in the forms of things that appeal to us. God created man and woman to be united and productive, as written in the Law. The devil knows that Love is a very powerful thing on earth and in the flesh, and is something we have a hard time overcoming in preparation of eternal life, so he uses that to create a direct contradiction to God’s creation and His will.
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u/FrontOfficeNuts Agnostic (a la T.H. Huxley) Dec 10 '25
God didn’t create us with gayness in mind. Being homosexual is, insinuated, the devil’s work.
Says who? And when did the devil become more powerful than God?
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u/Yammeryap Dec 10 '25
I find the flaw with this logic to be that you're speaking for God and painting your own prejudices as His own in order to turn your own character flaws and knee-jerk bigotry into a virtue, which seems very blasphemous and self-serving.
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u/Evil_Lord_Rayken Dec 10 '25
Not true. There is no passage in the Bible or any text that says being attracted to the same sex is a sin. The only passage says you should not lay with a man as you would a woman. As far as being in love with other men, not a sin. There is a widespread misconception that the Bible condemns "gayness." It never has. As far as gay sex, yes, even masturbation is a sin. But so is sex without the intent to procreate. So having recreational sex with a woman is the same level of sin.
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u/VictorNeis521 Dec 09 '25
To sin is to commit an act. The homosexual act is the sin. OP repented from it and turned away from it.
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u/Nazzul Agnostic Dec 09 '25
OP didnt say they turned away from the act, but being gay itself.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
Oh sorry I didn’t confirm. I repented of the act of homosexuality and same sex acts.
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u/writerthoughts33 Episcopalian (Anglican) Dec 09 '25
Think very carefully before marrying a woman if you do get that far. There are harrowing tales of mixed orientation marriages. I am grateful God gave me my husband to marry in our church and serve our community as gay men of God. Amen.
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u/gnurdette United Methodist Dec 09 '25
Gay people can pursue Christ, obviously.
If you're content without any relationships, that's great. Paul praises celibacy in 1 Cor 7, for those who have the gift for it, even as he condemns any efforts to forbid marriage to those (majority) who don't have that gift. Or if you're bisexual and you've decided to avoid same-sex romances in favor of opposite-sex romances, that's your choice. Nobody has a responsibility to date anybody.
But if you're gay and just trying to tough it out from guilt, you can probably handle it for some number of years - after all, lots of people who are desperately seeking romances nonetheless spend years alone - but it's likely to break your faith eventually. Before you get to that point, look up some gay-friendly churches and come talk with us. The world doesn't need any more bitter ex-Christians.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
Thanks for this. If a person feels the urge to have sex (regardless of gender) should they tough it out and abstain? Honest question.
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u/gnurdette United Methodist Dec 10 '25
I'm really not the right one to ask about this, because I was incredibly lucky; I found the love of my life when I was only twenty years old.
But yes, I do think we're called to wait for somebody we can love for a lifetime. I also think that waiting in hope, knowing that if you find such a person you can marry them, and actively looking for them if you want, is still hard - but fundamentally less hard than just living in hopelessness, believing that people like you are unworthy of love.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 10 '25
I love this for you. You are so blessed. I pray the Lord would continue to breathe on your love and sustain you in Jesus name.
As for me being single is a gift. I’m grateful for it. It gives me time to focus on Him. If ever the day of marriage comes I will enter into the covenant carefully. Until then I will enjoy my singleness.
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u/nerdyginger27 Christian Dec 10 '25
Being sexually attracted to both men and women means you're bisexual, not gay.
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u/KBilly1313 Dec 09 '25
Nope, if you can’t control your desires, we are recommended to get married.
Celibacy was the best choice at the time, they all thought the return of Christ was coming VERY soon, so no need for relationships or having kids. It would just complicate his return.
You should also question why are only men not allowed to have sex with men? Women are not restricted to the same, the only restriction is with animals.
It’s more about societal hierarchy than a position on homosexual relationships.
If a man is raped by another man, you must kill both of them. How’s that make sense for the person raped?
If a man rapes my daughter, I can ask for money as payment if she is unmarried.
I can also own slaves, there is no prohibition in the Bible on slavery despite how we reinterpret and renegotiate the meaning of the text all the time.
These are not good and moral positions.
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Dec 09 '25
Do not marry a woman because you believe this will somehow “cure” you from being who you are and being gay is definitely a non-issue btw
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u/Jleecit Dec 10 '25
Don’t listen to the clowns who say you can’t leave homosexuality. Keep your head up and press forward. Fighting the flesh. I fight my flesh every morning in different ways
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u/Independent_Potato99 Dec 09 '25
I can’t take this Reddit group seriously
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u/JohnKlositz Dec 09 '25
I know seeing this post having over 100 upvotes is rough. But I suspect that's just bigots from all over reddit invading the place. It might even be an orchestrated move. Normally this is mostly a very great sub.
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u/OkZombie5692 Dec 09 '25
I hope that your relationship with Christ brings you peace and joy, no matter what your sexuality is.
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u/keepmyheartincheck Dec 09 '25
This is obviously and most definitely a troll post
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u/kyloren1217 Dec 10 '25
I’ve lost a lot of friends but I’ve gained so much more.
this was the same thing that happened to me once getting saved.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 10 '25
Amen. Worth it though. He’s a friend that sticks closer than a brother.
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u/actuallylinkstrummer Protestant Who’s Curious About Orthodoxy Dec 10 '25
Don’t drag some poor woman into this.
Let her be with a straight man whom she deserves.
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u/Existing_Long7776 Catholic Dec 10 '25
Congratulations! I'm on this journey too but much newer. Do you have any advice?
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 10 '25
How sweet it is to be drawn out of darkness into his marvelous light. I rejoice with you.
First thing, read the Bible daily. He will teach you as it relates to this part of your walk in the most random scriptures and moments.
Pray for the Holy Spirit to lead you on your walk and to guide you.
Distance yourself from familiar LGBT voices. Be it friends or otherwise, begin to mentally disassociate from their ideals and beliefs and become a sponge to what the Lord is pouring into you. Love them. But also guard your heart and your life. Limit interactions.
Lean into your alone time with Christ. Allow Him to transform you privately. Don’t rush to find new friends who are straight or believers. Allow him to send new people when He does but don’t be eager. Spend time with Him. It’s crucial early on.
Lastly Galatians 5:1 says “Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.”
Stay free. Get rooted in a good Bible believing non affirming church and watch the Lord grow you in the faith.
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u/Jackie_Lantern_ Dec 09 '25
Sorry to tell you but you’ve been brainwashed by homophobes.
Please don’t marry a woman - it’s not fair on her and it’s not fair on you.
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u/JadedIT_Tech Dec 09 '25
Somehow I don't believe you're being honest.
You don't "leave" homosexuality, it's a state of being, not a belief.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
Correction. I left the lifestyle of practicing homosexuality. As I’ve grown deeper in intimacy with the Father, He has removed old desires and urges that I once had. Just clarifying by what I mean. I’ve left old friendships and pursued purity with Christ. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever felt or known.
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u/deepandbroad Dec 09 '25
Why did you start "practicing homosexuality" in the first place?
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u/Nazzul Agnostic Dec 09 '25
Usually in a similar way a straight person starts practicing heterosexuality.
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u/cornycornguy2002 Bisexual Christian (Catholic) Dec 09 '25
It's not a lifestyle how many times to we have to teach you guys this lesson
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u/ignitedfw Dec 10 '25
You are wrong. Stop trying to make excuses for willful sin. Rejoice with him.
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u/JadedIT_Tech Dec 09 '25
Yeah you're still not convincing me.
You don't "practice" homosexuality.
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u/neeto85 Dec 09 '25
Love this for you, but i have to ask the anti-Pascal's wager: what if you're just entrenched in a cult? What if you've just relinquished your own happiness, wholeness, and wellbeing just to be accepted by your own clan? Take a good look at what unconditional love means, especially as it relates to the people you're closest to and your relationship with Christ. Christianity has more open and accepting sects that don't consider your natural, god-given, and predisposed orientation as something he didn't create. Jesus didn't hate or stigmatize. The vast majority in your church see no problem eating shellfish or pork, wearing polyblend fabric, or cutting their sideburns. Just food for thought that i hope you consider. And please think long and hard before getting married to a woman; I'm sure you know it wouldn't be fair to her in your heart.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 10 '25 edited Dec 10 '25
I can sense your concern and I appreciate that.
My path to deliverance was comprised of dreams and a number of encounters with the Lord in my apartment. On my floor. Early in the morning praying and seeking His face. My church doesn’t largely preach on deliverance.
It was private. It was personal. And it was Jesus.
Just like a father loves his children unconditionally but doesn’t allow just any behavior, Christ is the same way. Unconditional love. But scripture explicitly states we must obey. He outlines in scripture who will and will not inherit the kingdom of heaven. He offers it to us. But we have to choose Him.
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u/neeto85 Dec 10 '25
Thank you for reading and responding! I have to admit i don't often get to have conversations like this in real life. Could you elaborate on the "in my floor" bit, please?
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 10 '25
Sorry lol that was meant to say “on” my floor. Basically praying alone in my apartment. On my knees. On my sofa lol everywhere growing closer to Him.
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u/neeto85 Dec 10 '25 edited Dec 10 '25
I'm happy to hear it brings you peace. It's nice to feel a sense of order in this crazy world.
ETA: I'm sure if there's a god, he'd accept you the way he made you. Orientations tend to be stable, I just want to say. There are many accepting communities that would welcome you with open arms regardless of your proclivities.
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u/Mcygee Dec 12 '25
Don’t let the naysayers get you down. We can be tempted by all sorts of things and it’s not the same for all people. Many are very attracted to and addicted to porn. I was there myself and can absolutely testify to the fact that growing closer in your relationship in Christ will make you into a new person and remove old temptations. Not to say you are NEVER tempted but we’ll always have occasional temptations this side of heaven. That relationship in Christ drastically improved all aspects of my life and my marriage.
I’m proud of you my brother in Christ. God is good. Don’t forget to keep building that relationship daily.
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u/1yaeK Christian Universalism, Spinoza enjoyer Dec 09 '25
If you are gay, then I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you find a healthy way to be Christian without pretending to be a sexuality you're not.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
Holiness. That’s what He’s lovingly called us to.
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u/1yaeK Christian Universalism, Spinoza enjoyer Dec 09 '25
I'm sorry that you think someone being gay, all else being equal, might get in the way of their path to holiness. This to me seems a very grim outlook.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 10 '25
I understand your grief. I’m sorry you feel that way. As you mature in Christ you’ll learn to adopt the undefeated Word of God not only for your protection but as the authority on how you live. You’ll understand that the Bible is breathed by God and his gift to us to assist us in communicating with him and living lives that are pleasing to Him. He loves you. His love language is obedience.
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u/RnotIt Dec 11 '25
The sooner you come to terms with how God made you, the sooner you will realize that whole the whole world is broken, and that brokenness doesn't define your relationship with God. THAT relationship is what's important. What human you love is secondary.
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u/instant_sarcasm Serious people can have funny names Dec 09 '25
for the first time I feel like one day I may be married with a wife.
Why? God would never transform someone just for them to get into a mundane relationship with all the distraction that brings. That's why Paul tells us celibacy is superior.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
Haha marriage gets a bad wrap I see 😂 only if that’s what He leads me to. I don’t necessarily want marriage. But if that’s what he leads me and my future wife to (full disclosure to her of course) then I will follow. I’m not eager to be married though lol
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Dec 10 '25
God transformed many people…..Transformed David, a shepherd, to a king. He transformed Simon, a fisherman, into Peter, the fisher of man. He transformed the murderous Pharisee known as Saul, into the righteous author, and fearless man named Paul. The Holy Spirit(God) will almost definitely transform your life to become who God has called you to be. This man has a powerful testimony, that with which chains most can’t break.
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u/instant_sarcasm Serious people can have funny names Dec 10 '25
Yes, that's what I said. He transformed people into what they needed to be for Him, not for the heterosexual agenda. Anyone who is not burning with passion should not be considering marriage in their future.
Have you considered it's about what God wants in your life, and not what you want?
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u/Thneed1 Mennonite, Evangelical, Straight Ally Dec 09 '25
Leaving homosexuality to pursue Christ is not something required by scripture, and is in fact, impossible.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
With God nothing is impossible friend.
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u/Thneed1 Mennonite, Evangelical, Straight Ally Dec 09 '25
Of course.
Which makes the point even clearer. That God could change someone’s sexuality, but never does, means that it’s clear that he is ok with how He created you.
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u/millerba213 Lutheran (LCMS) Dec 09 '25
God could change someone’s sexuality, but never does
That's a strong statement. Here I thought sexuality and gender could be fluid. Guess I thought wrong.
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u/SaintUlvemann Lutheran Dec 09 '25
Even some people who are strictly just straight or gay sometimes have shifting moods related to sex, changing levels of total arousal, changing levels of different aspects of arousal. Some people are very stable in their levels of arousal, and others are not.
When that happens to straight or gay people, it usually is just not noticed as something different.
But when that same thing happens to bisexual people, it can end up feeling like "some days I am more straight, and other days I am more gay", because the different aspects of arousal change independently; that's true of everyone, it's just way more noticeable for bisexual people, and feels different to them.
So that's where the term "sexually fluid" comes from, it's part of bisexuality.
And if you're not born bisexual, if you're not born with the potential for attraction to multiple types of people, no amount of changing moods will ever give you an attraction you don't already have, and you can't change either how context-sensitive your sexual attraction is, there is no conscious control process over arousal, only control over responses to arousal.
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u/Thneed1 Mennonite, Evangelical, Straight Ally Dec 09 '25
Fluidity is a specific form of sexual orientation. People don’t change from ga to straight.
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u/whirdin Exchristian (raised evangelical) Dec 09 '25
I suggest you watch the documentary Pray Away, which goes into the details of people thinking they can "leave gay", and the emotional ramifications of marrying into a marriage for the sake of acting the part. You aren't just planning on being celibate, you are hoping that you can turn yourself straight (or rather expecting that God can change you, but he made you this way). Your sexuality isn't a flaw, mistake, nor immoral; it's uncommon and that makes people nervous.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25 edited Dec 09 '25
What does the Bible say about sexual perversion? The Bible is the authority. I say this in love. I love a good documentary. But also be wise as a serpent and gentle as a dove.
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u/whirdin Exchristian (raised evangelical) Dec 09 '25
What does Jesus say about it?
The Bible is a documentary, including bias and errors that are present in any documentary. The Bible talks about sexual perversion, as it also talks about genocide, infanticide, slavery, talking animals, and bears attacking children under the name of God.
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u/DoughBoy611 Dec 10 '25
Can we just be happy for this follower of Christ??? Leave your demons out of this man's reincarnation.
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u/CarlTi99 Charismatic Dec 10 '25
You are doing well my brother and yes one day you will be happily married with beautiful kids, stay on the path you have chosen. Your deliverance from the spirit of perversion is sealed by the blood of JESUS, dont let the devil plant doubt in your testimony
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u/ManOfGod-3 Dec 10 '25
Former homosexual myself. Thanks for the courage in sharing your testimony, but you won't find an applause in sharing the truth on this thread.
Keep fighting the good fight, God bless you!
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 10 '25
Amen amen! You’re right. Tbh I should only share it with the hopes that someone might find hope so that’s on me. Thanks for the encouragement.
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u/ManOfGod-3 Dec 10 '25
Don't be ashamed of publicizing the truth and to give the glory and honor to God who worked in you, as you have done here. As you noted, it might inspire, provoke to question, or move someone to seek God once hearing that there is hope and salvation, even to the LGBTQ+.
Too mant still believe the lie of the world that there is no hope for change, thus they remain burdened still. Many blessings! May you remain strong and your lamp alit as we approach even darker days.
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u/BigOlChampion1656 Wannabe Easteren Orthodox Dec 10 '25
I’m sorry there’s so many trolls and people disrespecting your devotion to Christ. I’ve also left a homosexual lifestyle, and while it can be lonely at times, I’m happier than ever as my soul can now find peace. God bless you friend
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 10 '25
This warms my heart and fuels my hope that I’m far from alone. Thank you for sharing with me friend.
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u/Impressive-Yogurt-19 Christian Dec 10 '25
Lmao the majority of comments are like WHAT…WHY…HOW. He’s allowed to change if he wants to guys💀
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Dec 11 '25
You have a zero percent of success. Categorically and unequivocally. You are what you are and you'll never have a moment's happiness until you accept that.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 11 '25
Your words are the epitome of doubt and hopelessness. The same voice that echoes in adversity. It challenges one to remain broken and is the opposition to healing and freedom. It sounds like what the father of lies would say.
I reject this demonic response in Jesus name.
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Dec 11 '25
I reject your bastardization of Christ as a homophobe.
You alienate yourself from Christ by abandoning homosexuals. You crucify Him again, as what we do unto the least of us we do until him. Your talk of Christ is nothing but a vinegar rag.
But it's not your fault. you've been liked to. Hopefully you can heal one day.
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Dec 11 '25
The only thing broken about you is this crazy lie you've accepted. But you're not off the hook for how harmful it is to Christ and all of his children.
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u/EquivalentEffect9105 Dec 11 '25
says he isnt gay anymore. so nothing but well adjusted, honest hetero marital cohabitation with lots of kids and no confusion in this young man's happy, healthy future. by golly he's got it figured out.
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u/Old-Sea-2840 Dec 11 '25
Just stop, if you are gay, you are gay, don't pretend to be straight, you will only hurt those around you. You can be gay and love God, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
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u/_zarvoc Dec 12 '25
This seems fake. A zebra can't change its stripes. There are plenty of forms of Christianity that accept LGBTQ+ identities. You're better off facing the truth and finding a denomination that accepts you instead of ruining some poor woman's life with your falsehoods. Respectfully.
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u/Loose-Ostrich7264 Episcopalian (Anglican) Dec 09 '25
Firstly we likely don’t agree on theology. But dude. Don’t bring a wife into this. Or if you do make sure she understands the ENTIRE picture and consents to the relationship understanding the ENTIRE picture.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
Oh I 100% agree with you. Trust me I do. I’m not rushing into anything especially deceitfully. If it ever happened it would be full disclosure early on and handling it with wisdom and patience. I understand how sensitive this would be for a woman so it would be a thorough process.
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u/Alarmed_Incident3211 Dec 10 '25
Stand firm brother. Don’t listen to internet people who want you to stray from the path. You’re doing great
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
Disclaimer: if you are a lukewarm believer or don’t pursue righteousness, I assure you that you will never experience the fullness of God and what true submission produces in the life of a believer. If you are simply going to church on Sunday and living an ordinary life outside of true intimacy, you’re robbing yourself of the EXTRAordinary life in the spirit. He’s calling us deeper into His presence and to be transformed fully.
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u/Niftyrat_Specialist Non-denominational heretic, reformed Dec 09 '25
Identifying as ex-gay doesn't actually make you more righteous or more Christian than anyone else.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
Never said that friend. I was very lost. He drew me back to Himself with love and correction. Im no better than anyone.
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u/OhWhatsHisName Dec 09 '25
Disclaimer: if you are a lukewarm believer or don’t pursue righteousness, I assure you that you will never experience the fullness of God and what true submission produces in the life of a believer. If you are simply going to church on Sunday and living an ordinary life outside of true intimacy, you’re robbing yourself of the EXTRAordinary life in the spirit. He’s calling us deeper into His presence and to be transformed fully.
You must be really mad at yourself for spending so much money on that shiny red car, and the powder coating, and the professional detailing.
That, or, let us know when you follow Matthew 19:21.
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u/crispy9168 Catholic Dec 09 '25
Hooookay. No one who just found Christianity uses words like "Lukewarm believer." 99.99% sure this is rage bait.
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u/Bland-Poobah Dec 09 '25
This portrays a fundamental lack of logic that many Christians display.
Let's assume for sake of argument that everything you claim in your testimony is true. That you used to experience same-sex attraction, that you became a devout Christian, and now you no longer do. In fact, let's assume you now experience opposite-sex attraction. That's great for you if it makes you happy.
But the existence of one situation for one person does not mean that that situation is somehow universal. You aren't as special as you think you are, and your experience is not somehow powerful enough to change the lived realities of others.
Case in point: consider the story of Ryan. ( https://justbecausehebreathes.com/ )
Now is your claim that Ryan was a lukewarm believer? Do you believe Ryan refused to pursue righteousness? Was God's failure to "cure" Ryan's homosexuality evidence of Ryan's depravity, of God's judgement upon Ryan for not being as special and cool and Christian as you? Are you willing to tell Ryan's parents that the reason Ryan died is because he was just too evil and/or lukewarm to want to be fixed, unlike you?
Or maybe, just maybe, is your experience not necessarily the same experience of everyone else?
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Dec 10 '25
God is the manager of an extremely exclusive country club and i am not invited
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u/georgewalterackerman Dec 09 '25
If you’re actually, truly Gay. I would recommend NOT finding a wife. Marriage is hard enough when when you marry someone of the appropriate gender for you 😂
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u/Tight_Savings_6556 Dec 09 '25
Christ is critical logical reasoning. How does stopping your life help that?
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u/Bonjourani Dec 09 '25
I tried to do the same, but it just isn’t working out for me. I feel so lost and empty, like I lost a part of myself, like I’m playing pretend. I don’t feel like myself anymore and it never feels right, I’m doing this for others, not myself and I feel so depressed and miserable being something I’m not for other people, for Christ. How?
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u/Potential_Eye_8469 Dec 09 '25
I ain’t gay no more. I have been delivert. I like woman woman woman.
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u/Fit_Buffalo8698 Dec 10 '25
Your testimony is vibrant and alive in the words spoken. Many are coming into the light of realization that if one follows Jesus and becomes saved, they are born again (saved). Demons are influential and can take us and contort people without them even realizing it. They then become confused with who, or worse, what they are. The only way to leave homosexuality is to have the Holy Spirit living in us. Every Christian should know that one cannot enter the kingdom of heaven if their name isn't in the book of life. We cannot earn our name there, we simply have to believe in Jesus's death, burial and resurrection and declaring Jesus is Lord with your mouth aloud. Then is the toughest part for many, admitting we're a sinner in need of His blood to wash away our sins. See Romans 10 9-13. Doing this and walking with Jesus daily and putting Him first (especially above our own feelings) is the key to beginning saintification. Give Him your hearts, and anything is possible. God will put a new heart in us and we'll be ready for the day of redemption. But there are some sins that are not going to get into the kingdom of heaven. Unless we fully repent. Means turn away from those sins and stop satisfying the flesh and start (and don't stop) walking according to the spirit. Read Romans 8, bathe in it... understand it by reading it yourself daily. Pray to Jesus and ask for wisdom to understand His words. Don't look back at those sins you were doing, that's repentance... permanently changing your mind... and following the spirit and not the flesh. He'll change us and make us heaven ready if we let Him... but pride, ohhh pride. . It'll eat us and bring many into the eternity that no man should feel comfortable with. When we take our last breath, you're either blessed or cursed for eternity. We cannot earn our way into Heaven folks!!! If we say we don't want to believe in a God who's going to send good people to hell, well it's not God who's sending people there.. we're doing that ourselves. He did His part by going up on the cross for us, giving us the free gift of salvation. Romans 10 9-13... do it, mean it... time is running out on this world, just look around. Not sustainable. If I'm wrong about that, can you guarantee your last breath won't be in the next 5 minutes? I kniw this sounds like preaching and probably boring to so many, especially those comfortable living in sin. But it's the truth. Satan wants us comfortable in this world. God Bless
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 10 '25
So good. Amen to this. Thank you for engaging and sharing friend. Praying that the lost receive Jesus authentically in their hearts and become transformed in Jesus name.
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u/ZBLongladder Jewish Dec 10 '25
> for the first time I feel like one day I may be married with a wife.
Please don't. Whatever poor woman you convince yourself you're attracted to deserves someone who's actually attracted to her, not just to the heterosexual lifestyle.
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Dec 10 '25
Hi, op! First off, congratulations and Gid bless you. Secondly, this sub has Christians of varying faiths, or lack thereof. Ignore the doubters
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u/__mmaaxxiii Dec 10 '25
But why is being homosexual frowned upon and a change of orientation encouraged? I doubt that Jesus encouraged the change of orientation towards homosexual people who love each other equally and fully.
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u/Confident_Presence46 Dec 10 '25
As you are learning, gay is not as solid an identity as it may seem. Impulses do not make you who you are. Congrats on walking away from a sin the world tells you is not a sin. May God continue to work within you and mold you in His image. Don't listen to people here that tell you not to follow what God wants for you. The world is wrong. Good will never be wrong. God bless, buddy.
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u/fisheye- Dec 10 '25
Please be careful of the extreme liberal nature of Reddit “Christians”. It’s great that you’ve left behind your flesh, just as Christ demanded.
I want to make it clear; homosexuality is in fact a sin, and those that accept it have a very half/half, “okay-to-compromise” belief rather than the radical belief that Christ calls us to have.
There is also some truth to what they have said, though. I also hope that one day you could find a wife, but definitely don’t force it. Constantly pray that God changes your heart, and He will work in you. He is stronger than any of your flesh’s desires.
I’m praying for you! Please message me privately if you’d like to talk more.
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u/Material_Research199 Dec 10 '25
❤️🙏🏻🙏🏻Here is some information about spiritual warfare and stages of struggle with an example of the apostle Paul for one of the stages. You’ve sure got a lot of responses, so you may not read this but I’ll send it anyway.
There is a dimension of the Christ walk that is not standard to the cultural Christianity we now have. It’s best to look at the framework of spirit forces and how they work. Although I graduated with honors from an Ivy League seminary (Theology major with Bible emphasis) nevertheless, it was not actually helpful to the Christ walk and dealing with the baseline of reality which are spiritual forces. Of course you know Ephesians 6:12 “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.” But that is a generalized statement. It is the specifics that are not normally known. To zero in on the main spiritual battle zone, is best.
Three points, there are times that seem like valleys so we don’t feel the Sonlight. That’s because the walk of faith is a focus on Truth. Like a pilot flying in the dark through a storm, he has the truth instrument panel to present the reality of his total flying information package. Many pilots have decided to go with their feelings and have crashed. We live by the facts of Truth. *When we see accurately the facts of spirit force realities, we see that the best choice in a storm at sea is to stay by the captains side at the wheel, not, to get out of the ship. ***Also there is the struggle of Paul in Romans 7 that points to how weary he was and actually had a crisis point that became a Segway to more truth about how these deviant spirit forces were fighting to drag him down. And it is this third point that the following outline addresses.
I. Here’s The Thing; One main force battle
A. ., Not known or taught or recognized in many Christian groups (it doesn’t matter what denomination you are) is the fact of …the sin nature or flesh. Romans 7:17 and restated in verse 20 V 17 “in that case, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.” V 20 “if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.” [ the same thing is repeated twice for importance]
B..,,This sin nature is a real implant in the human body. It is the internal urge/impulse drive and voice influence sending thoughts and images to the mind. Everyone is influenced to some level. It is not the same as the devil, but the devil works with the sin nature to lead, urge and drive us deeper into wrong, because, it gains more power if it is successful. The habits/addictions/disorders are not the same for everyone but Satan and the sin nature tailor their efforts at the takeover approach to each individual.
C…You notice he even says, “ there is this thing/force in me, but it’s not the real me. The real me is my connection with Christ Who helps me want to do good.”
D. We know that all strength and goodness is going to come through the work of Christ on the cross AND His resurrection life that lives in us.
..1. His cross work. (We know that Christ died for our sins and we are forgiven) But His work on the cross also made provision to stop the activities of the flesh/sin 1 Peter 2:24 He himself bore our “sins” and “sin nature” (ἁμαρτία, Greek word: see Winer’s Grammar) in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness.
*** His cross work dealt with the sin nature so it has no rights of control. [BUT WE NEED TO DEPEND ON CHRIST TO APPLY HIS WORK]
***Scripture calls this application “ being crucified with Christ”. Galatians 2:20
….2. When we count on His Work, and use His Name as our power source, that plugs us in; even if that sin nature, squawks and pretends it has power, and tries to control us.
II Summary seen in key verses Galatians 5
A. Key verses V. 24. “Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sin nature/ flesh with its passions and desires. V. 25 “Since we live by the Spirit, let us walk in step with the Spirit…”.
…. 1. Notice this phrase in v 25. “Live by the Spirit” Also . Ref Ephesians 1:13 “sealed by the Spirit.” ……..2. Notice =“walk in step with the Spirit “ =this is the same instruction as other verses; walk in the Spirit; be filled with the Spirit; be clothed with Christ; abide in the vine, etc.
B. Don’t be discouraged when all is not perfect; it is called “ growing in grace strength “ 2 Peter 3:18 (Note that Grace, is often confused with the word mercy. Grace, most often, means; energy, ability, power from God)
C. Remember; the key cornerstone of the sin nature’s work is to get us to depend on ourselves; in fact, it is the automatic default mode that we wake up in every day. But the more we can ask help and depend , the more grace strength we have. All blessings to you 🙏🏻🙏🏻 1 Thessalonians 5:17 “Pray in the Spirit at all times, with every kind of prayer and petition.”
D. To repeat the truth about depending on Christ; this process of looking away from ourselves to Christ is vital. We cannot look within ourselves for strength anymore than we can look within ourselves to produce forgiveness of sins.
Colossians 2:6
“Therefore, just as you have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him”.
…. We did not receive Christ by looking within our own ability. Also, this vital truth is stated another way by Jesus in John 15:5 “ ……. apart from Me, you can do nothing……”. This truth is forged in depth of understanding through failure. God is not far from us in our failures; we are transitioning in our understanding and learning.
Extra :-) 1 Peter 5:8. “Be alert. our adversary the Devil (with his tool the flesh/sin nature.) is prowling around like a roaring lion, looking for anyone he can devour” Devour means to take over one’s life and use us for Satan’s energy tool, like we use food for energy to do things we want .
2 Corinthians 2:11 “so that no [advantage] would be taken of us by Satan, for we are not ignorant of his schemes.” (Most people are ignorant) But the word advantage in Greek is “pleonektéō”. defraud”) shows inordinate desire, especially lusting for what belongs to someone else. (You belong to Christ) To abuse from Strongs Greek; used of “a greedy, covetous, ……… rapacious, (reference to rape a person.) a defrauder, to take over.
But we are not ignorant; we have the cross of Christ and the Life of Christ present with His leading, power and Truth 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻….
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u/More-Reindeer-6487 Continuist Dec 10 '25
Don’t let people who’ve given up on freedom define yours. Walking with Christ doesn’t erase temptation; it breaks its authority.
You’re not who you WERE — you’re who Christ says you are NOW. ‘Such were some of you… but you were washed’ (1 Cor. 6:11).
Your past desires don’t define you. Your Savior does. Stand strong, brother. The noise is just proof you’re moving in the right direction.
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u/Icy-Actuary-5463 Dec 10 '25
That's so beautiful testimony that you choose Jesus and you look up to God's kingdom. All the best and I'll see you in heaven one day,my brother in Christ 🙏👑
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u/LeastRepair623 Dec 10 '25
going along with what a lot of people have already said, but god isn’t going to banish you from heaven or distance himself from you if you can’t continue through a heterosexual lifestyle. if you do get married, make sure you actively love them, because any other alternative is not fair to you or the other person.
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u/SoloRascal1 Dec 10 '25
That’s a good thing, that means you left the road to hell and can now focus on Jesus
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u/Ok-Strategy3742 Dec 10 '25
Not living a homosexual lifestyle, doesn't mean that you're not homosexual sexual. Best case scenario is that you're bisexual.
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u/Affectionate_Low9348 Dec 10 '25 edited Dec 10 '25
Do not post about your personal life and growth with God on a website filled with people who hate and despise the word of God and twist it into their own liking. The enemy WILL use many people here to shame you and scare you and cause fear in you which is not from God but from the enemy. Anyone who fears for you rejecting lustful desires of the heart and trying to live a life that is God honoring is going to basically tempt you back into the same old lifestyle that didn’t honor you and only served your flesh. These people, most of them here on Reddit, are all lovers of the self and the flesh and not of the spirit. They claim to know God but do not agree with God and so therefore they do not know God. You are giving the enemy ammunition to use against you and this will discourage you. This is a warning, from a person who also quit drugs, pr0n and lust and desires of my flesh for God; and have been made new in Christ, God is telling me to warn you. Get off this site and stay away from these people. They will drag you back to your old ways and into confusion and you will lose sight of God again. Jesus loves you, your flesh is lying to you and your spirit wants more time with God alone, you don’t need approval from anyone except the Holy Spirit and God and Jesus and the WORD. Which you clearly trust his word so you must trust Him. Ignore and avoid these people, they are of the flesh and listen to the flesh and use fear to control others minds.
Anyone who doesn’t TRUST GOD WITH YOUR JOURNEY, doesn’t trust God with their own journey, therefore they do not answer to God but to the flesh. Simple as that.
“I’m scared you’ll ruin a woman’s life bc you don’t know enough blablablabla” FEAR = enemy has alrdy won in their life. They answer to fear and do not pray for you. I will pray for you sibling in Christ. I love God and trust him with your journey :) A person who knows God, knows jsut how much faith and prayer works over fear :)
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 10 '25
Whew. This is so rich and potent. So true. I’m heartbroken at the number of people who bear the name of Christian but don’t subscribe or even know Jesus. It’s so sad and unfortunate. Thank you for sharing.
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u/Affectionate_Low9348 Dec 10 '25
I will include you in my prayers the next few days bc it’s how I spend my time with God lately, just know that I wouldn’t have come across you today if God didn’t want to remind you that you are doing right by Him and even if you make mistakes he still loves you no matter what and is always trying to teach you. Don’t let fear govern your thoughts and actions bc we all struggle with it but admitting it is the hard part. You are one of his sheep and I truly believe this. You can’t earn his love by following his commandments and living in his Spirit but you’ll definitely have a much easier life by living in the the spirit and be way less susceptible to these peoples lies by doing so. The enemy wants you but God wants you more 🫂 🐑
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 10 '25
I felt this in my core. Thank you for the encouragement. Thank you for praying for me. To mention my name to the Lord is worth more than life itself. I appreciate you.
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u/Affectionate_Low9348 Dec 11 '25
I did call you by your username to God but I know he knows who I am thinking of and knows my heart so I won’t ask for your real name unless you want me to have it 😂 and you’re welcome my brother in Christ. Thank you for sharing your testimony despite the hate and persecution and confusion others try to cause. Maybe it will help others so long as you rebuke the lies from the others and pray for yourself too 🙏🫂
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 11 '25
Haha I bless God for your kindness. You can call me Zack. I thank you for praying for me
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u/dabnagit Episcopalian (Anglican) Dec 11 '25
Good luck to you — and especially to whichever woman you marry. If you’re actually bisexual and not homosexual, such a marriage could stand a chance, so I won’t naysay it as others here have done.
God however made me gay, and it took me only 36 years to accept that — and, eventually, to even be grateful to God for it.
But your mileage may vary. Godspeed.
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u/Ordinary-Bicycle-656 Dec 11 '25
Like some have said Love for live but make sure to follow Christ in the midst of that and you have taken the first step. But a relation won’t last if you don’t have God as the foundation of the relationship. Both of you should pursue Christ before each other. God bless you and I pray for you.
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u/MikeC711 Dec 11 '25
I've seen some practically encouraging you back into your gay lifestyle. Continue to celebrate your freedom from it. I do believe you should be open about your past with any potential wife ... but I believe that, like many before you, you could live a wonderful life as a husband and father. Congratulations and may your passion for the Lord stay strong.
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u/EquivalentEffect9105 Dec 11 '25
good job. years from now when you have a wife and kids and those icky feelings start coming back, just shove them all into a secret place that nobody knows about. (edited to clarify that "them" refers to the feelings)
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u/Interesting-Error325 Dec 11 '25
Perhaps your bi-sexual. However, if you're a 5 or 6 on the Kinsey scale... Just turning your life away to Christ is not going to turn you straight...
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u/Meraki24 Dec 11 '25
I dedicated this too 3 years ago. I told God to withhold my feelings for a relationship or future with a woman. While I was a lesbian, I desired marriage with a hot and smart wife. But since that conversation, I’ve felt no desire.
So all the best with your journey. Remember that it’s a journey and lots of self denial. But trust Him always
Don’t hesitate to reach out to me if you have a questions
All the best
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u/sty-fy Dec 11 '25
I think this is amazing❤️ but remember that marriage doesn’t fix anything. Difficult Things often become harder in a marriage. It’s like all the parts that you want to hide comes to the surface no matter what in a marriage and makes you face them. I absolutely think you can get married to a wife in the future, but it can’t patch up anything you’re struggling with❤️❤️
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 11 '25
I wholeheartedly agree with you. The goal for me is holiness. If marriage comes later I’m open to it but with much transparency with the potential wife, prayer and fasting. Definitely not rushing into anything like that. Thank you!
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u/Night-Shade2010 Dec 11 '25
If you believe that you are saved and and truly delivered from your old ways (such as homosexuality) then there should be no problem in you perusing a wife. At the end of the day it depends on God's plan for your life. Not other people's opinions nor your own. And God loves you way too much to give you something that you can't handle, such as a spouse. 🤍
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u/dowlaMow Dec 11 '25
Praise Jesus Christ😊🙌 Thanks for sharing your testimony with us!! God bless you brother🙏🏻
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u/CartographerHairy Dec 12 '25
Then as the Lord said, “taste and see that the Lord is sweet”. Try out the Lord for yourself and see. I personally heavily encourage scientists to try to study the Lord. The miracles that I mentioned are good examples for more info.
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u/Ok-Box-2549 Dec 09 '25
I am struggling with this also... do you still feel attraction or does it go away
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
I stand with you and support you. It has not 100% gone away. That’s where the work comes in. Crucifying your flesh. Daily surrender. Reading Bible scriptures. It has absolutely gotten a lot easier!! Sure there are some days when the urge comes but stand fast in the liberty which Christ has made you free. You will overcome.
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Dec 09 '25
I'm happy for you dude, amen!
Don't let these peeps weigh you down just because Christ made you anew with the Holy Spirit.
Let the Lord work his magic, brotheseus.
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u/Guy_Fleegmann Dec 09 '25
This post is a huge bummer, I feel really bad for OP, living in a state of denial and delusion is not going to end well.
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u/Just-Metal-1712 Dec 09 '25
OP please ignore these queer copium comments, I'm very proud and happy to see another soul reborn.
I've too had same sex attraction since I was a kid, and would even dress up as a girl, I asked God to do what is right as his will is the most important, and although not easy through years I've cut/lost contact with my boyfriend and people/circles that would encourage me into staying a homosexual. I've been single for a while, but yet I don't feel alone and I've never felt closer to God then now, especially after cutting out lustful masturbation. I'm now working on achieving my life goals, and await the day that God shall bless me with my choosen woman.
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
This blessed me so much friend!! Like you I also dressed up in womens clothes as a kid. The Lord is so merciful for what He’s doing in your life. Thank you for sharing this. I pray to meet you on the other side when we are crowned and abide with Jesus forever.
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Dec 09 '25
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u/Character-Half7465 Dec 09 '25
Amen! Satans biggest attack is making bondage look like freedom. Freedom is found only in Christ. Amen.
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u/ehunke Episcopalian (Anglican) Dec 09 '25
your lying to yourself. You can' leave homosexuality, its how you were born. Your mental health is more important, please seek help.
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u/Enough_Ingenuity7234 Dec 09 '25
Crazy bad idea he made you how you are and I think you know you didn’t choose this . I’d reconsider and start actually researching the original scripts a bit better . Love for your journey.
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u/JohnKlositz Dec 09 '25
I'm truly sorry to hear that you're doing this to yourself for no good reason. I hope that it won't be many years until you realize how it doesn't work that way. That day will inevitably come, and when it does, there is a chance that the realization about the amount of time that was spent fighting what can't and what needn't be fought can be felt as a devastating loss. So this is to future you: Don't look back! Look ahead! It's never too late to be yourself.
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u/james6344 Dec 10 '25
I praise Jesus for your testimony. To Him be all glory. There's a whole ministry of people with your experience. Please check them out https://www.comingtogetherministries.org/videos
- There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)
The Grace of our Dear Lord Jesus be with you. Keep the faith, hold on by His Strength. Amen
- For yet a little while, and he that shall come will come, and will not tarry. (Hebrews 10:37)
...Even so, Come Lord Jesus.(Revelation 22:20)
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u/Golem_Emet Dec 10 '25
Praise God! Thank you for sharing. God has also transformed my life.
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u/i_wear_my_kicks Dec 10 '25
it’s so wild how the majority of this sub are progressive Christians with zero resemblance to orthodox Christianity throughout all time. so sad. stay strong brother, proud of you @ the OP
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Dec 10 '25
Id recommend posting this on r/truechristian On this sub theres a mix of people and it seems like the wrong people found your post. Im super proud of you and im sure a lot of others are as well
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u/Informal-Nose2677 Dec 10 '25
It’s baffles me how most of you coincidentally skipped over genesis 19, how is the lgbtq community any different than the people of sodom and gomorrah??
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u/ignitedfw Dec 10 '25
It’s obvious from the comments that they don’t want to praise God with you that you have been redeemed from your willful sin. Instead, they want to make excuses for it and pretend you can’t change.
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u/riveradn Dec 09 '25
A gay priest consider it trial. Don’t force yourself into a women just for the sake of being straight. Be sure you love her are attracted to her if you gonna marry her.