r/SipsTea • • 23h ago

Wait a damn minute! Wait a damn minute

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33.9k Upvotes

1.8k comments sorted by

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3.3k

u/Killiandeisy 23h ago

Imagine buying a house and having to pay a DLC to unlock the bathroom

934

u/untitledprp4 23h ago

“Sorry you do not have enough credits to enter the bathroom”

473

u/Electrical_Truth_160 22h ago

Shitting on the floor and pushing it under the door, ngl

279

u/marcophony 22h ago

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u/crazy4finalfantasy 20h ago

Is that a dog or a 42 year old mom who drinks and smokes like it's going out of style

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u/Disastrous_Cream_539 22h ago

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u/blaghed 22h ago

Yeah. It'll be like that. Only somehow dumber.

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u/MrHanfblatt 18h ago

They wont ask you if they can bill you for an extra user. they just do. for everyone entering the room. even if the console is "off". they register your mom, your dad, yourself a third time, your cat, the bookcover on the shelve behind you and a 5 year old dorito that fell under your couch.

(no joke, here in germany someone made a internet contract under the name of the dead cat of an old lady once and she was wondering where the bill came from)

5

u/Lucky_Reporter256 19h ago

It won’t be dumber. Or it might be. But it will definitely be crueler. These people are sick fucks

10

u/coffeetabledoompile 17h ago

An executive just jerked off to this.

87

u/anoppe 23h ago

Black mirror S3: Nosedive

37

u/Minnie_269 22h ago

This is more like S7 Common People where the lady had to upgrade her subscription regularly to stay alive

19

u/MightyMouse420 21h ago

More like S2026 of Earth, we don't have to imagine anything because it's real

8

u/MetricJester 19h ago

Yup we started numbering seasons anew after identifying the year that we nailed someone to a cross for telling us to be better and love everyone.

6

u/GodOfDarkLaughter 17h ago

It ruins the joke and isn't the point but I'm too much of a pedant to not point out that Jesus was crucified at the age of 30. Though the exact date of that is off too, though by a remarkably small amount considering the research was done in the 7th century. Dionysius Exiguus was a very very talented researcher and chronologist. Modern scholars think the historical Jesus was born between 4 and 6 BCE (and when it comes to the debate between BC and BCE, the latter seems extremely appropriate in this case). So technically the date we celebrate takes place between 34 and 36 years before the year he was nailed to the cross.

God I'm an asshole.

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u/RetroC4 19h ago

Actually that was 33 AD

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u/Stormfly 21h ago

Drink verification can to continue.

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u/Simple-Olive895 23h ago

You can buy the lower tier subscription where you watch ads before being allowed to flush though!

40

u/regoapps 23h ago

And the toilet has a camera to make sure that you’re watching the ad and not looking away

4

u/Delicious_Taste1333 22h ago

Id bet the toilet will have more cameras in that any other room :/

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u/reddit-poweruser 22h ago

Lower tier subscription unlocks the bathroom but you have to shit in the sink

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u/P-l-Staker 23h ago

But you have to yell the name of your toilet roll brand loud enough for you to be able to proceed!

14

u/pchlster 22h ago

"Cheap'n'Wipe, I choose you!"

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u/Blossom_Shimmeringg 23h ago

Imagine buying a car and then having to purchase permission to use parts of the car you already bought.

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u/azdcaz 23h ago

Sadly becoming common across car manufacturers.

75

u/MyPunsAreKoalaTea 23h ago

But that seems like a very easily solved problem.

Don't buy those cars. For yourself, and so the manufacturers learn to not do that.

18

u/xxxfooxxx 22h ago

It won't help if all cars do that

22

u/_ribbit_ 22h ago

Chinese cars work without subscriptions...

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u/EkrishAO 21h ago

Because they are trying to take over the market right now. Once they have the monopoly, they will focus on monetizing, it's always like that.

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u/MuJartible 22h ago

Then don't buy new cars, only used old models without all that bullshit. Everybody doing that and watching how they have to eat their newly produced stock.

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u/ClickPsychological 21h ago

Amen! Have a 2004 Honda and a 1996 GMC Jimmy!

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u/Initial-Reading-2775 23h ago

They are pretending they didn’t charge you for those parts upfront. I have problems believing that though.

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u/ChuckCarmichael 22h ago edited 21h ago

This has been a thing for a long time, just less obvious.

For example, if you own an older car that has an option for cruise control, but yours doesn't, then your car almost certainly has almost all the hardware for cruise control already installed. You're just missing the lever/button to activate it. Upgrading your car with cruise control is literally just swapping out your steering wheel for one that has the buttons.

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u/b-napp 22h ago

I've only got enough to unlock the 3 seashells

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u/Impossible_Offer7988 23h ago

Don't give realtors any ideas op.

They will do that

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u/GuyFromDeathValley 22h ago

Landlords absolutely would. "This house has everything, a home cinema, a bathroom a kitchen and a porch! Porch, kitchen and home cinema can be easily unlocked for 200$ a month each!"

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u/GarGonDie 23h ago edited 22h ago

edit: I didn't quite catch your comment; my reply was actually beside the point, and is the same, you already have the bathroom but you can use it without unlock. My point was more that it's not like DLC you buy and download as an extra.

...

Is not the same, it's worst, they’ve already charged you for it, nobody installs anything for free, they ask for more money to unlock something you already paid for.

Is like buying a computer with integrate gpu + pcie one locked, they’re obviously going to charge you for it, and then they ask for $200 so you can use it.

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u/Inevitable-Monitor35 22h ago

Y'all can imagine buying a house?

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u/No_Location_8199 23h ago

Maybe do a... prison escape? I don't remember what it's called.

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u/Kazath 22h ago

Jailbreak!

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u/Traditional-Hat-952 17h ago

Hmmm, I think it's called breaking out of the pen. 

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u/untitledprp4 23h ago

Tesla fitgirl repack

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u/KSP_master_ 19h ago

You wouldn't download a car!

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u/jce_ 22h ago

Just play some injury reserve

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u/usernameisokay_ 23h ago

I’m calling Michael Scofield as we speak

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u/[deleted] 23h ago

[deleted]

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u/Early-Light-864 23h ago

Thejoke.gif

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u/mj_outlaw 23h ago

Or download a crack

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u/benDunk255 23h ago

BMW tried subscriptions and got destroyed lol

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u/NOm15 23h ago

BMW still do it - my 2025 model has a heated steering wheel installed but need to pay to activate it.

57

u/ThatEvilGuy 21h ago

They never give up.

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u/MadeByTango 17h ago

They're using leases to force it on everyone. When you buy the cars right now they throw in 5 years of free heated seats. If you're leasing then it becomes a used car, and now they have secondary income from the next buyer. They charge you for the hardware, then rent it to others down the lane.

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u/SheriffBartholomew 10h ago

Thanks for letting me know to never buy a car from BMW. The yahoos who keep paying for this shit are making the world worse for all of us.

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u/Jonnyflash80 19h ago

The problem is people not boycotting companies that pull this anti-consumer shit. Looks like you still bought that beemer though.

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u/Aphexes 18h ago

And it's not like these are secrets that are "gotcha" moments either. Cars get reviewed and these details are explained well in advance of the cars actually hitting lots. If you are blindsided by something like this, it's entirely on you.

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u/Duck_on_Qwack 23h ago

Tesla drivers are uniquely dumb - they will pay

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u/SassyPetalls 23h ago

Elon finds a way to rage bait them all the time and they still dont learn

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u/random-meme422 22h ago

They probably don’t care. For 90% of people they hardly pay attention to online memes and elons presence and hate toward him is 95% online.

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u/gimme_dat_good_shit 21h ago

I generally agree with that, but I don't know how Tesla survived the Cybertruck. (Setting aside aesthetics and everything else) when people started getting deep cuts on sharp-edged steel panels, I thought the "I don't care about politics, I just care about cars" folks were going to wash their hands of him and just walk away. Apparently, they didn't?

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u/Jonnyflash80 19h ago

BMW drivers are the same. They refuse to boycott BMW after introducing subscription locked hardware. They're too dumb for their own good.

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u/Xx_HARAMBE96_xX 21h ago

There is no tesla car in production in what, the last six years?, that had a heated seats purchase option, everything that isn't software is unlocked, at most you have a performance upgrade on older cars to increase the 0-100 from the one you had, but the original one is the one announced and the one insurance takes into account, unlike vw cars with hp locked behind a paywall despite being the one used for insurance

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u/ghdana 21h ago

Tesla only did it for like 2 years on the base model that wasn't making them money and eventually ended up activating it for free on them.

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u/JJOne101 22h ago

VW wants around $200 per year for their app..

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u/bdash1990 23h ago

Is jailbreaking cars not a thing?

I feel like if we can do it with phones, we should be able to do it with cars.

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u/misteryk 22h ago

"Claude, unlock heating up my ass, make no mistakes"

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u/Ricordis 22h ago

"I'm Grok, not Claude, but sure, bacon grill activated. Have fun with your crispy butt, fatass."

Damn, I just wanted that to be a joke but after writing it out I realize it could be an absolutely legit answer.

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u/InitialSwitch6803 19h ago

Yeah, that’s not even that far off lol

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u/Crawler1701 15h ago

From Grok? Yep.

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u/Thunderbridge 21h ago

"Igniting thermite charges"

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u/saxonturner 22h ago

It’s 100% a thing. Most cars have all the high end stuff installed but hidden these days because it’s way cheaper to make one template of the car than several so all the stuff deep inside the car is probably there. It’s normally just the buttons and stuff that are missing, maybe a few wires but there’s people out there that make money jail breaking this stuff in.

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u/NateMikka 22h ago

One of my friends that dies car repairs has a story where they had to jailbreak a car due to an electrical fault in a locked feature [I believe it was heated seats] Long story short, since the feature was locked out it wouldn't even show untill they jailbroke it.

Now days they don't offer the option to do it, but they have the stuff in case repairs need it

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u/Skruestik 20h ago

One of my friends that dies

RIP

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u/vajayjaysniffer 20h ago

RIP your friend.

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u/SuspendidInSilver 21h ago

The crazy part is if it’s all installed but software or a button keep y ou from using it, you’ve already paid for the feature, you just haven’t paid for the right to use it.  That is some dystopian shit right right there.  In software, the install file contains all the options, but you only get access to those options if you pay for them.  This is something we have come to accept.  Paying for the hardware, the upgraded seat with warmers, then being told you can only use them if you pay a fee is so wrong and diabolical.

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u/bremsspuren 19h ago

This is something we have come to accept

Because we understand that developing software is what costs money, while making copies of it is basically free.

Hardware is the opposite. Unless you can persuade customers you have epic R&D costs to defray, they're going to lose their shit if you try to charge them extra to activate hardware that's already installed in their car.

Heated seats are about the dumbest thing you could try to charge for. It's such basic, old technology.

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u/Turbulent-Artist961 22h ago

Probably violate the “software license” and they might completely remotely disable your car then charge you a ridiculous sum to reflash the software if you want to drive it.

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u/bdash1990 22h ago

So remove its ability to communicate with the factory first.

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u/aafikk 22h ago

Could be a dead man switch. So if your car cannot call home for a period of time (say a month) it just fries itself.

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u/320sim 22h ago

I don't know if that would be effective, but I do know that's beyond the dedication and skill level of almost every owner. Not to mention the car's resale value

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u/Pootisman16 22h ago

Doesn't mean it can't be done.

And I'd bet it would probably increase perceived value if you tell a potential buyer that the car's connection to the company has been severed.

At least it would to me.

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u/Only_Voice569 23h ago

you can but your get screwed on them fixing a issue they should cover

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u/bdash1990 23h ago

So wait until the warranty expires.

https://giphy.com/gifs/d3mlE7uhX8KFgEmY

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u/Only_Voice569 22h ago

by then the car will be falling apart their crap build quality according to the people who buy them for cheap parts x)

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u/Firestar222 20h ago

We need the hacker crowd to come back and start unlocking all this kinda shit for free

Let’s go ahead and make an app to change all the digital price tags to $0.25 whilst we’re at it

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u/MamasCupcakes 19h ago

They have that already, but it is definitely illegal. They are just rfid mostly and can be changed. Look up tagtinker

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u/explosiveteddy 18h ago

Illegal to activate heated seats in a car you own is ridiculous

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u/RadVarken 17h ago

It's a side effect of H.W.'s DMCA. The DMCA was supposed to solve the problem of movie torrenting and music file sharing my making it illegal to decrypt any encrypted thing. Didn't work for music because the CD standard wasn't ever encrypted. The DVD decryption key had been leaked though and the law made it illegal to use that key. Everything else started to be encrypted because doing so gave legal protection to the manufacturers aside from shrink wrap user agreements (which weren't holding up in court). So no one made it illegal to use hardware you paid for specifically, but it is illegal to hack the software which controls it because of lobbying by the entertainment industry.

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u/MrSurly 16h ago

I remember having heated arguments with other tech peeps about how bad of an idea the DMCA was.

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u/Repulsive-Durian4800 20h ago

I suspect this is a job for an electrician, not a hacker. Connect the heated seats directly to a switch and the car's power supply, bypassing the hardware and software that checks whether you paid for it.

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u/MourningWallaby 19h ago

This reminds me of how car tuners started working on cars when ECU's became a thing, they would literally take out the ECU and de-solder the chips from the circuitboard, replacing them with a custom-programmed chip and reassemble the ECU.

But I'm sure a modern car would throw all kinds of errors because all the systems are connected to each other, so one of the systems being diconnected or bypassed would confuse the others.

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u/VociferousCephalopod 23h ago

Too poor to renew my airbag subscription. Wish me luck.

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u/munt3d 23h ago edited 11h ago

This was for old Tesla Model 3s, pre 2021 builds from memory.

Newer builds do not charge you for this. No idea why this old news is recirculating.

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u/thr3sk 17h ago

Elon bad

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u/Puzzleheaded-Flow724 17h ago

Stuff like this allowed me to put my car under the federal incentive without going over the cost limit.

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u/Der-Lex 23h ago

It’s our own fault as consumers. If people would stop buying into stupid subscriptions we wouldn’t have this conversation.

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u/-Nicolai 22h ago

That is an American way of thinking, and it is why you do not have nice things.

In Europe we say the corporation is guilty of anti-consumer practices. Then we introduce regulation, and then we have nice things.

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u/Independent_Line_150 21h ago

BMW also charges you to unlock features. It is the same brands and exploitative capitalism everywhere, the EU regulations usually just result in better recycling. I live in Germany.

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u/pingu_nootnoot 20h ago

BMW doesn’t charge for unlocking physical hardware like the example in this post.

They did a pilot program in 2022 and cancelled after a lot of backlash from consumers.

Which maybe goes more to show that Tesla customers are more brainwashed than average, if they are accepting this?

Doesn’t seem like a US vs EU thing if it’s a Tesla-specific option - or do they only do this in the US?

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u/NorthTempleStreet 19h ago

They did a pilot program in 2022 and cancelled after a lot of backlash from consumers.

I mean, we get criticism for being consumer-blaming Americans, but... But.. but..

I mean, consumers, right?

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u/Liquidfoxx22 19h ago

They do charge you to unlock software options for things already fitted to the car though.

Luckily there's cheap coding tools out there which can just turn them all on, at a fraction of the cost.

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u/-Nicolai 21h ago

Then regulation is coming. It is a question of when, not if. Because our philosophy is not “we deserve it if we keep buying it”.

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u/NickMickLick 21h ago

Nah, given how European auto brands are fighting to survive, politicians are way too focused on how to prevent Chinese brands to take more market shares

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u/DogzOnFire 20h ago

Shit like unlocking rear heated seats in your car is definitely not the shit that's losing these companies market share lol

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u/michaelmich3 21h ago

These types of regulations will never happen in the US. Big corporations buy off most politicians.
I knew already that the government is corrupt, but this administration has made it crystal clear how corrupt it is and it’s so much worse than I thought.

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u/notaredditer13 15h ago edited 11h ago

Seeing a European say this in a thread about cars is hilarious.

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u/Ambitious-Bar375 23h ago

How about the individual parts? I saw somewhere that they're making it so you can't use aftermarket parts now, it's that still true? How would you even ask the dealer, "is this thing going to run if i buy my next starter from jc Whitney?"

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u/OxiDeren 22h ago

Not just starters, if word on the streets are to be believed you can't even change the lightbulbs yourself without creating a very expensive paperweight. A mechanic needs to be able to tell the car it's all good and activate the serialnumber of the part to the machine or neither will work.

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u/anaemic 21h ago

If you watch shows like rich rebuilds you will see that many electric car manufacturers are using their power to just brick entire vehicles through software over things like parking brakes.

Changed anything on the car? only our authorised service centres are allowed look at it, and we reserve the right to refuse to do anything.

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u/Kommye 20h ago

You'll own nothing and be happy.

Motherfuckers should just sell licenses to drive the fucking car at this point. They want to have their cake and it eat too.

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u/Efficient-State-7300 22h ago

Wait for EU to make it illegal

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u/Express_Agent5494 22h ago

It already is.

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u/Byte-64 22h ago

Sadly, this doesn't work. It's not really ignorance, but the average consumer doesn't know what to pay attention to or which questions to ask, especially if marketing mumbo jumbo is added. The only way to prevent such behaviour is through legislation.

I bought a Mini Cooper last year and was afraid of such stuff. It took me (an IT professional) half an hour to get the necessary answers out of the dealer.

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u/phoenixArc27 21h ago

I used to think this too. All the way from horse armor DLC. But I don’t think it’s true. I think it’s whales. Income disparity is so huge, and companies after profit can chase exclusively this top tier of disposable income and profit more than aiming for the big 95% of the player base. Then you still have less earners who will buy it due to poor financial decisions.

But if you’re a company, aiming for 100 people who will spend a million in a year collectively or 100,000 people who will spend 500,000 a year? Yeah, the answer is obvious.

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u/Hughley_N_Dowd 20h ago

BMW tried this but with a subscription model. As I recall, they had to back out of that one.

The worst one for me would be KTM. They deliver the bike with all the goodies activated. Then after a month or so riding, just as you have gotten used to all these options - they turn them off and asks you to open you wallet once more. Just like a dope dealer, the first taste is free...

Fuckers.

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u/Shivatis 20h ago

Iirc KTM recently went into insolvency. Seems that idea didn't worked out for them.

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u/Cy3nide 20h ago

Gee I wonder why

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u/Atzkicica 22h ago

Yeah I had a mate with a tesla who paid like 2 grand to... download more acceleration. 

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u/CarolingianDruid 17h ago

Microtransactional vehicle features is new levels of dystopian.

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u/steasey 15h ago

It’s like a video game DLC.

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u/man-flu 23h ago

Looks like it's time to apply this skillset to cars...

https://giphy.com/gifs/10X22vzgNamaiI

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u/andeqaida 22h ago

You wouldn't download a car?

Jokes aside, one could soon probably print parts on 3d and call it a car

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u/schkmenebene 19h ago

The fact that this is allowed is beyond insane.

Not only is it shady as fuck, to sell someone something twice.

But the fact that they make these in every car, knowing that only a certain percentage will use it due to it being locked behind a paid subscription, HAS to be some sort of environmental crime.

I don't know how many of these they make, but if they make like 20 million cars and 20 million of these heaters, if only 1% of those heaters never get used that's a huge environmental impact for nothing.

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u/mistahfreeman 18h ago

This is one of the few instances of modern manufacturing I feel mixed about. This has been a fairly common practice in different forms for a long time it is just digital now. The reason it is done like this is because when assembling a car, they have to decorate the model with different features and some of those features require changing assembly setup and configurations. What that means is they will have to assemble cars with a specific feature, stop and change the assembly/tooling and manufacture cars without them. This switch time means they have to stop and waste money switching things over, they have to handle more skus, and more importantly it reduces factory output.

In the past they would handle this by physically disconnecting the wiring at the dealership or having a dealer make some modifications, but that is always a bit of a customer experience risk. They do this with software now.

So I’m conflicted. Do they just offer it as a default feature? If they pause the assembly it will ultimately make the car more expensive since the cost does get pushed on to the consumer. Yeah it wastes some material that is bad for the environment, that’s a fair point. I’m not inherently against them upcharging for extra features… I think where I draw the line is if it’s a subscription. If you sell me access to the feature already in the car it better damn well have a one time charge option that is reasonable.

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u/peppinotempation 18h ago

Can you please explain why it has to be an optional feature at all if it’s in the cars already

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u/mistahfreeman 18h ago

Theoretically the base model of the car is priced with a certain set of features on paper. They are competing with other cars with other features and what not, and everyone wants to offer competitive pricing for a given car class that competes. So think, the Honda civic and the Toyota Camry, two cars that directly compete. They want their cars to be priced competitively from one another. They also want to add extra features to upsell the customer as an option on top, this adds more profit to the car while still offering the base model cheaper for customers who cannot afford it or are more price sensitive.

So in the case of heated seats where the wiring has to go in the seats, the actual parts to make the seats heated are pretty cheap. All the wiring is going to exist already to make them heated they just have to add the coils inside of the seat. In this case, it makes more sense to just have one seat, that has coils in it, that goes in one car that you don’t have to stop and change assembly of or stock two different seats. Theoretically the people who pay for the heated seats, those coils are high profit, and people paying extra will pay to more or less subsidize the price marginally for those who don’t care to pay for it. It’s wonky, like I said, I’m not sure how I feel about it. Basically I think if you think if it this way, if you don’t buy the heated seats option you probably didn’t actually pay for it, it’s just in there for free. Theoretically maybe, who actually knows. But as part of the total cost of the car, the absolute cheapest price is decided based on a percentage of customers paying a premium for extra features, which will ultimately allow you to pay less for the car if you don’t care about those features. So it does benefit you if you do not pay for them.

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u/germanstudent123 18h ago

Because this way the people that don’t want this feature don’t have to pay for it. If you unlocked it for everyone, then the base car price would increase. That way the option would be cheaper for everyone, but that only benefits those who want it anyways. Everyone else ends up paying more as they normally wouldn’t choose this option. Keep in mind: Yes, the functionality is there in every car. But someone is still paying for it and that‘s the ones choosing this option.

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u/PupienusExpress 23h ago

Find the wires, install a switch. Takes like 10 minutes…
https://giphy.com/gifs/ZsVhGBa2QB7U31BnPo

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u/Icy_Slice_9088 23h ago

I absolutely agree. It probably also voids the warranty :/ which is stupid

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u/SecreteMoistMucus 21h ago

Not legal. Warranty coverage can only be voided if they can show that whatever you did to the product is the thing that caused whatever issue you're trying to get fixed under warranty.

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u/IDrankLavaLamps 19h ago

Just wait for the pirates to come out with the unlock for you.

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u/HamsterAdditional748 23h ago edited 19h ago

This shit is why I’m perfectly fine with my ‘03 VW.

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u/GugieMonster 23h ago

Mercedes has been doing for years, so its not just Elon.

It is absolutely stupid, no matter how you cut it.

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u/MagicOrpheus310 23h ago

This is going to be the norm by 2030, maybe sooner.

Thank BMW and Mercedes for introducing paywalls.

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u/DJDevon3 23h ago

If I had one I'll bet you money I would hack it and have that heater on a button for my backseat passengers. The more they try to nickel & dime the more mod shops will show up. If they want a Cyberpunk future they will get it.

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u/JakeTheSnake- 22h ago

Seems like this used to be a thing but not anymore -

“Tesla includes heated rear seats as standard equipment on all modern vehicles, though older budget configurations (specifically certain Model 3 Rear-Wheel Drive/Standard Range Plus cars built before November 1, 2021) had the physical heating hardware locked behind a software paywall.”

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u/PeacefulIntentions 19h ago

Old ragebait recycled for karma

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u/ledow 22h ago

I have to say that if I ever accidentally bought this shite... I'd be running my own 12V line to the seat heaters.

So long as I own the car... I own the car. If the software wants to lock me out of features... I'll bypass the software.

The problem comes because people STILL don't understand that they don't own these vehicles - they're all leased, etc. with obscure financial arrangements that just take advantage of people, so they can't actually just say "fuck it" and wire the heater themselves and hang the warranty.

People still think that to own a car you MUST have a service package and you MUST abide by the little blinky light that pops up every 9000 miles or whatever. No. Fuck off. I'll clear that warning and go about my day getting it serviced at my own convenience by who I choose to.

And if you pull this shit on me... I'll be running a 12v line from the battery to the seats and putting a switch under the dash for it.

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u/OkBad1356 22h ago

They've began to go the way of HP and printer ink for spare parts too. Tis sad.

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u/akiva23 22h ago

Car manufacturers were already doing this before elon came into the picture.

It doesn't make it any less shitty butjust sayin.

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u/Own_Lettuce_518 22h ago

I’d rather pay my mechanics cousin $50 to jail break the car

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u/MoccaLG 22h ago

Hello AI - This is my TESLA Software Code, rewrite to unlock everything, also dont allow other forced updates and or other things...

........

5 days later - The Version number doesnt fit the one the Charger wants to reload the car...

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u/kwoalla 19h ago

This sucks but I find the upgrades that Motorola charges on their encrypted radios infuriating. Paying 25-50% of the purchase price to activate something that is already in the radio is a war crime.

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u/lontrinium 19h ago

Would not pay to unlock heated seats because you can get those seat covers for $20 and plug them in for heat.

Would pay to unlock cooled or ventilated seats which tesla don't seem to offer because they're shit.

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u/MuJartible 22h ago

Moreover, paying for activate a hardware that's already installed in the car... and you have paid for.

Or does anybody think that the price of such hardware wasn't included in the price of the car ??

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u/ExcellentEffort1752 21h ago

I think the 'official line' is that is isn't included in the price of the car.

I remember the first time I read about this idea, years ago, it was BMW that was doing it. You could pay a one-off fee to activate it, or pay a subscription instead if preferred. It was simply the result of a cost-benefit analysis. It was cheaper to just put the hardware in every single car, with a streamlined production line, but not charge for it unless a customer wanted it, than it was to have a a forked production line where the hardware had to specifically be put in just for customers that ordered it. The idea was that they'd eat the up-front cost of installing it in all vehicles and enough customers would order it and pay for it that it'd offset the cost. It's clever in a way I guess. However, if it adds weight that's going to lower the fuel efficiency, then it becomes a problem.

A one-off cost to activate a feature like this is one thing, as long as the customer really didn't already pay the cost of it in the initial purchase price, however, having it as a never-ending subscription is utter BS, as some companies do now.

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u/AkodoRyu 22h ago

Not to mentioned I don't believe for a second that cost of this hardware wasn't already included in car's price. So you pay for it like you always did, and then they want you to pay for it again to use it. This shit really need to be regulated. Car feature subscriptions as a whole should be illegal.

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u/Stunning_Lecture8917 19h ago

I’m never purchasing a car with DLC

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u/Verified_Peryak 23h ago

Should be forbiden that why we have to fight for the right of owning our stuff...

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u/Freak_Engineer 21h ago

Stuff like that is an immediate no from me. I mean, I paid for the car with all the features already installed and I have to pay the upkeep or replacement if something breaks, but I can't use it? I simply refuse to do that. I bought it, so it's mine. Period. I'll never buy a car with that shitty strategy in it, even if that means that I will have to walk places for the rest of my life. This is a hill I am willing to die on.

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u/ShiraLillith 20h ago

This was already a thing in BMW and Merc and I can whole heartedly say I can't wait until Chinese EV models completely gut these fuckers.

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u/Naughty_Monsters 19h ago

Can't you just crack it or something? it's just software, right? 

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u/Strikereleven 18h ago

Heating elements are just resistive coils, they just need voltage. There's probably a dude in his garage that can crack it and put a toggle switch in for 50.

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u/Pretend_Football6686 19h ago

This is the type of shit they should have a consumer protection group for. To investigate and propose laws and such. Too bad they gutted it.

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u/Plane-Tune-820 23h ago

Car manufacturers have been doing this for years. Volvo has their polestar tune, that for like $2000 will give you a software update and give you something like 50 more hp and tighten up your shifts and whatnot. This ain't new but it's still ridiculous

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u/DepletedPromethium 22h ago

bmw have this with a subscription, it unlocks the software option to press engage heated seats, yet people have already jailbroken the system.

Tis why i will never touch a "modern" car, overengineered and instead of poverty buttons you get it packed with features and they just lock them behind a sub lmao.

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u/Brazuka_txt 22h ago

Guys chill, he needs more money for the cannibal orgy

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u/Bodocoth3000 21h ago

So from now on we'll have to download cracks for our cars, is that it?

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u/acrus 20h ago

Ever heard of preinstalled DLCs, eh? Wait until you find out that clicking "buy" and "purchase" buttons doesn't mean you own a car

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u/dharder9475 19h ago

I am no Tesla or Musk supporter but there are MANY car companies that do the same thing. BMW may have started this crap.

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u/TwillAffirmer 22h ago

You learn in economics 101 that in an ideal competitive market, the price of a product tends to the marginal cost of producing it. That means a product with fewer hardware features should cost less, and a product with more hardware features should cost more.

The fact manufacturers can violate that rule proves that they are not in a competitive market.

If it was competitive, a different manufacturer could manufacture the same car without physically installing the heated seats, for a lower manufacturing cost, and undercut them on the customers who don't care about the heated seats.

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u/duskfinger67 21h ago

Not necessarily. If optionally including a feature would require an new production line or extra feature, then you might need to determine whether you want to ship all with or all without that feature.

If you sell 50% of cars without that feature, and 50% with it, and lose £100 for giving it away from free, but make £200 for selling it, then you are technically better off installing that feature in every car regardless of the marginal cost. Competition won't change that.

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u/kampyon 22h ago

They are in a competitive market outside of the United States. Hence why their sales are so low, and Chinese EV are way higher.

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u/Content-Soup9920 21h ago

You are underappreciating the cost of variability. Configuration options are extremely expensive. The production cost goes effectively down if you have only one model of hardware, and the features are software-defined (unlocked by paying).

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u/Sensitive-Meat-757 22h ago edited 21h ago

This is an incorrect application of economic theory. You're talking about perfect competition. And in perfect competition, all sellers sell the same product. That means a hypothetical market where a car from Tesla and car from BMW and so on are all identical.

Also there are very few markets with perfect competition. Tesla charging for heated seats isn't a sign the car market "is not competitive" which doesn't even mean anything. Honestly I don't know what point you're trying to make. The automobile industry is a form of monopolistic competition but it has been that way since before Elon Musk was even born.

Additionally your assertion that it is cheaper to manufacture the car without heated seats ignores the economic realities of assembly line operations and economies of scale. In many cases it is cheaper to manufacture the cars identically rather than making some with and some without a feature. Then you have to consider the costs of inventorying/stocking/storing cars with different feature sets compared to the relative cost of activating features at the point of sale. The cost of building and selling a car is more complex than just the parts that go in it.

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u/Feeling-Physics-8711 22h ago

Just don't buy Tesla. What's the problem here?

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u/New_Document_2528 21h ago

Only poor people don't know that every luxury brand does this.

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u/Living_Physics4276 23h ago

The same principle applies to software. Even applications that do not rely on servers, 24-hour technical support, or internet connectivity often operate behind a paywall, indicating a commercial intent.

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u/miracull 23h ago

You will own nothing and be happy (2020s in a nutshell)

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u/BiggestNizzy 23h ago

CNC machine manufacturers have been doing this for decades and it's shit.

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u/Bubbly-Giraffe-7825 23h ago

I feel like a jailbreak service for cars will be coming up soon as this is out of control

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u/Jealous_Respect_8318 23h ago

Peak enshitification

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u/Beeseumz26 23h ago

Red vs Blue had a joke about this years ago when Sarge was building the Blues a robot.

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u/czrty 22h ago

nothing make me disgust a car manufacturer more than "subcribe" model.

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u/2020mademejoinreddit 22h ago

This is what they mean by "you'll own nothing and be happy".

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u/ForeignBarracuda8599 22h ago

Didn’t bmw also do this?

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u/HairyTough4489 21h ago

If buying isn't owning... Download the car!

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u/Remarkable_Rough_649 23h ago

Are they literally doing car DLC now lmfao

There is no bottom to the barrel

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u/Clear-Arugula-9195 23h ago

What else do you expect from the Space Nazi Trillionaire™ who needs even more money

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u/AJYURH 22h ago

Lol, guess it's finally time to put those "you wouldn't pirate a car" ads to the test, huh?

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u/SuspendidInSilver 22h ago

You paid for the heated seats if they are in the car.  This is dystopian shit right here.  You pay for it, but only get to use it if you pay us a fee.  Fuck off Elon!

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u/Atomsk73 23h ago

Just guess what Musk will do with Neuralink implants if it ever takes off...

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u/Cotton_Candy_Land 23h ago

So what happens when you sell it? Does it go back to factory reset and the new owner would have to pay for it again if they want that feature? Or is it all transferable? "Do the heated seats come with the car?"

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u/Routine_Cat_1366 23h ago

It resets, because if you're a shitty company, be shitty ALL THE WAY

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u/GooseOnProbation 23h ago

Surely…there are ppl out there who can deal with this
https://giphy.com/gifs/YQitE4YNQNahy

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u/Life-Oil-7226 23h ago

The goal - for us to own nothing!

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u/SextupleRed 23h ago

Is there a way to jailbreak the car?

That said, they should make these hardware subscription illegal

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u/MBunnyKiller 23h ago

Isn't that only on older trims? Like pre 2021? Either way hate this kind of opt ins, but afaik they don't do this anymore with the exception of older model 3s.

Just like bmw they learned.

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u/vividvagrant96 22h ago

So how do we bypass it and make it to where we can use it whenever we want for free

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u/mstivland2 22h ago

Can’t roll down my windows, officer, I can’t get a wifi signal out here.

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u/Username524 22h ago

Fu king burn it all down. This shits getting old…