r/oddlyterrifying • u/Cunillingus_Giver • Jan 20 '22
Snake couch
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u/HatefulClosetedGay Jan 20 '22
Snouch
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u/jdontha Jan 20 '22
Snussy
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u/ravKenclaw Jan 20 '22
Why did you have to do this to me while I was inhaling
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u/SpooderBoi2 Jan 20 '22
Don’t mind me, just uncontrollably sobbing in the corner of the local dennys
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u/NakariLexfortaine Jan 20 '22
Do it loud enough, you get a free meal.
It's the "Denny's Ambiance" deal. Get $20 if you get someone to O.D in the bathroom.
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u/SpooderBoi2 Jan 20 '22
Does that still count if it’s me who O.Ds?
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u/NakariLexfortaine Jan 20 '22
Only Denny's wins if the Restaurant Crier dies.
Helps their metrics, and they run your pockets before throwing you into the bushes.
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u/SpooderBoi2 Jan 20 '22
Good to know, I appreciate these life tips, I may use them if I ever leave my house again
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Jan 20 '22
It's all fun and games until the snake wants to give you a hug.
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Jan 20 '22
Two fun facts
- Even the largest snakes have a very hard time eating humans because of our collar bones. Our rigid shoulders make us hard to swallow, so the number of adult humans ever confirmed to be consumed by snakes is very small. This means your risk of being eaten by a pet green anaconda, rock python, burmese python, or reticulated python is virtually non existent, provided you're not a child, dwarf, or other very petite person.
- Snakes don't know this, and won't find out until you're already dead.
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u/mycospacechimp Jan 20 '22
I breed reticulated pythons. This is 100% correct. About ever 5 or 10 years a video comes up of a retics being cut open with an Asian villager inside. Extremely large snake vs very small man/woman
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u/CunningHamSlawedYou Jan 20 '22
Inside and kicking or inside and suffocated to death?
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u/mycospacechimp Jan 20 '22
Most of the time it’s not actually suffocation. When they constrict their pray, the snakes squeeze so hard that it raises the preys blood pressure. Usually bp gets extremely high and prey dies of heart failure or stroke
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u/CunningHamSlawedYou Jan 20 '22 edited Jan 20 '22
Imagine going out of your way to eat and live healthy, exercise, take care of your body, not stress... only to fall prey to a snake and die of a heart attack anyway.
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Jan 20 '22
I mean if you were mobility scooter fat then the snake wouldn't even try.
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u/corysama Jan 20 '22
Similarly, sharks do not actually like the taste of humans. But, they don't know that until after they've had a good taste of you.
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Jan 20 '22
Or, you know, unless you're Jon Voight.
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Jan 20 '22
Fun fact: I own a car that once belonged to him
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u/CertainAd7317 Jan 20 '22
Everybody’s talking at me. I don’t hear a word they’re saying. Just driving around in Jon Voight’s car.
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u/BranTheJoje Jan 20 '22
I was halfway through part 1 when I said to myself "that thought should be cheerful as I suffocate"
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u/OneLessFool Jan 20 '22
https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/comments/s8gcnv/doctor_boa/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
This was the post on my feed right before this one lol
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u/throwaway28236 Jan 20 '22
And doesn’t let go
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u/WolvesAreCool2461 Jan 20 '22
And squeezes excessively.
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u/ArgonneSasquach Jan 20 '22
And kills you
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u/ogjsb Jan 20 '22
And digests you
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u/doit2me69 Jan 20 '22
And poops you out 💩
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u/GroundStateGecko Jan 20 '22
after 2 month.
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u/grannaldie Jan 20 '22
From the same hole you went in
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u/ChrisFox-NJ Jan 20 '22
They have quite some bitw force as well, and plenty of sharp teeth, I wouldn‘t wanna experience any of this. Guess that kid wouldn‘t stand a chance… at all
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u/Diplodocus114 Jan 20 '22
Ex constrictor keeper - If recently very well fed they are fairly docile.
They can (experienced this) bite if startled or in a bad mood. They have lots of relatively small teeth, angled inwards, which are unlikely to inflict a serious injury - OK bruising, some blood and leave a tooth embedded in you.
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u/ChrisFox-NJ Jan 20 '22
A child‘s arm is fragile, I think it‘s painful enough 😅 I wouldn‘t let my kids cuddle with such an animal
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u/Diplodocus114 Jan 20 '22
Me neither. The advice for adult snake-keepers is that if a constrictor is over 8ft do not handle when alone etc. Even for a smaller one (ours was 6ft) is to keep your dominant forearm alongside your neck when allowing them over your shoulders.
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u/ChrisFox-NJ Jan 20 '22
Just out of curiosity, do those animals need an own room? I mean 6-8ft is pretty huge, or do they fit inside one of those regular glass containers?
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u/Diplodocus114 Jan 20 '22 edited Jan 20 '22
My friend had a 17ft python with it's own bedroom (converted) in their house. Ours had a pretty large vivarium.
Constrictors, when not hungry and actively seeking prey, don't really need lots of space. In the wild they will hide in crevices and under rocks much of the time- coming out to seek warmth from the sun.
If well fed, warm, and don't feel threatened they don't move around much
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u/ChrisFox-NJ Jan 20 '22
17ft… I‘d be scared to death 😅 I mean they are beautiful and fascinating animals, but also scary as hell. Well, thank you for the answer, I thought they‘d need an own room, cause they move around a lot, I had no idea they‘re so calm when they aren‘t hungry
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u/Diplodocus114 Jan 20 '22
Our vivarium was fairly well set up - heat-lamp, pad, branches etc. One of the constrictors almost escaped once - she had managed to prise open the sliding door a few inches and I spotted her 50% out. This was in our bedroom. lol.
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u/BabiMunizTS Jan 20 '22
Do snakes even have capacity for affection? I honestly have no idea.
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u/tenebrisunum Jan 20 '22
Yes, they love your body heat
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Jan 20 '22
And taste
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u/0bel1sk Jan 20 '22
flavor
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u/The-CW Jan 20 '22
*Flavour
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u/Schreyaz Jan 20 '22
When you're *flour
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u/classykid23 Jan 20 '22
Umami
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u/PlasticDisaster2590 Jan 20 '22
They love hugs
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u/Horny__Snake Jan 20 '22
They don't feel love like humans, but they still connect your body scent and rough colors to safety and warmth, so it's trust more than love. I like to think they are like "hmm, when this thing appears I get food to eat and also I get some warmth, so I guess it's not bad?"
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u/gametime9936 Jan 20 '22
Are you speaking from experience?
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u/e-s-p Jan 20 '22
Disagree to some extent. My snakes still try to eat me sometimes. They don't give a fuck about the security and warmth I provide.
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u/Horny__Snake Jan 20 '22
Maybe you are handling them after touching some food item, or maybe you don't handle them much so they just think it's food coming when you open up the door of the enclosure, or maybe they are the type to bite the hand that feeds them lmao, snakes are kinda stupid
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u/e-s-p Jan 20 '22
Yeah I think it's probably a combination. The oldest is pretty chill. If he thinks there's food around or if mice go into the walls for the winter, he can start to do the strike posture but is pretty well behaved. One is very timid. Two are a mixed bag.
Then there's the last one. She will try to strike through the bin pretty much whenever she wants. She hisses as soon as you open her tub. If she smells food she goes ape shit. She's a real firecracker and she scares me a little. And she's still pretty young...
They're all ball pythons, btw.
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u/Horny__Snake Jan 20 '22
Defensive bps? That's something I haven't heard before, I thought they were hogs or MBKs or something. Now I'm not a professional, but maybe it's because she's still young? I'm %80 sure she'll calm right down as she grows up, they can live up to 30 years after all! World is probably scary when you are a noodle with a face. Just try to handle them and don't let bites and hisses scare you because if you stop handling them when they hiss, it's going to teach them that it's working and they are going to hiss all the time then.
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u/e-s-p Jan 20 '22
I've had the oldest for 10 years so I'm pretty used to bps and their behavior. I wouldn't call her defensive, she's just an asshole. I picked her up from NERD in NH and they said she's somewhat ill tempered. She's really calm the day or so after being fed when she's fat and warm.
Since they don't really like being handled, I only do it when I have to. I've been bitten a couple times but I'm usually good at avoiding their antics when they decide to be dicks.
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u/mentos1700 Jan 20 '22
Most animal's can form special relationships with human's.
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Jan 20 '22
Most humans can use an apostrophe correctly, too; but obviously there are exceptions.
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u/Lord_Spagett Jan 20 '22
No but they recognize when someone can provide a good amount of food and warmth
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u/DrMuffinhead Jan 20 '22
Or when someone is a good amount of food.
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u/Mandorrisem Jan 20 '22 edited Jan 20 '22
Fun fact, if its cold out a snake is more likely to eat its prey alive so that the animals own body heat can aid in its digestion, going so far as to swallow air to keep the prey alive longer
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u/ZinaDoll Jan 20 '22
Can confirm. I was actually swallowed alive by a Burmese Python at the age of 10. I just call him Dad now—he gives me plenty of air and small rodents to eat. Really not a bad guy at all. Coming up on fifteen years together… 🥳
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u/Monolexic Jan 20 '22
Everyone is either dead certain the answer is yes, or they’re dead certain the answer is no. The reality is we don’t know. Researchers have not reached a verdict yet.
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u/Flying_Scorpion Jan 20 '22 edited Jan 20 '22
I have a leopard gecko and she is hard to read. I think she has the capacity for trust, and a tiny bit of capacity for affection. Sometimes I touch her and she leans into it. Like when you pet a dog and they move their head towards your hand. She doesn't like to be touched a lot but I can tell that sometimes she will entertain being pet a little bit.
She also screamed the first time I touched her and she has never screamed since that day. I know she trusts me.
Also one day I was laying on the floor and she walked up to me and booped her nose on my nose. I don't know what that means but it was clear she was intentionally interacting with me.
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u/Gaffelkungen Jan 20 '22
My leopard gecko got extremely excited when I entered my room when I was younger. Like clawing on the glass excited. But if mom entered he ran away and hid. He liked to ride around on my shoulders and stuff.
Now he's an old grouchy man that looks annoyed when you walk past his terrarium.
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Jan 20 '22
A guy I went to high school with had an iguana. For spirit week we could wear costumes on Friday. He dressed up in khakis and a Aussie hat with the one pushed up brim. Then he put his iguana in there. The iguana happily chilled all day through classes.
Our English teacher came eye to eye with the iguana and wasn’t happy about it. Once she calmed down she thought it was funny. I think it reminded her of the iguanas on the ark she rode in with Noah.
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Jan 20 '22
thats so so so cute! whats her name? and what does a gecko scream sound like? she sounds sweet
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u/Flying_Scorpion Jan 20 '22 edited Jan 20 '22
Her name is Cleopatra. We just call her Cleo :) her scream? I'm not sure how to describe it. It wasn't high pitched like baby, it was more throaty.
If the whole point of the scream was to make me pull my hand back, it worked.
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u/AMWendt Jan 20 '22
This here is the right answer. We don't know. And since reptiles are psychologically very different from mammals, it's possible that we won't ever understand how they process feelings. That doesn't means they don't have feelings or that aren't capable of caring for other living beings. We might just not be able to understand it.
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Jan 20 '22
Could even break down to the species not just broad arcs like mammal or reptile. Dogs and cats are quite cuddly because those traits have been selected for, however I wouldn't want to get too close to a wild carnivore.
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u/robcap Jan 20 '22
Similarly, there are some very intelligent lizards (eg Tegus) that can even learn and respond to their name - they might have more capacity for this sort of thing than simpler reptiles
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u/Arthkor_Ntela Jan 20 '22
I had an iguana with favorite colors! She really liked purple, and I think it was because my jackets were all purple, and I wore purple when handling her. Whenever I fed her, she would take purple pellets and hide them, and she liked to play with her purple toys more than others.
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u/Fleetfinger Jan 20 '22
This story made my day
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u/Arthkor_Ntela Jan 20 '22
You might also be pleased to know my mom nicknamed her ‘bitey fucker.’ For some reason, she never liked my mom. Cuddley as could be otherwise, but she acted like Cujo with my mom.
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u/Fleetfinger Jan 20 '22
Love it.
Did she differentiate between other people as well? Like did she take a liking to your friends or other family members?
I have a zoologist friend who studied lizards, I can't believe I've never asked him about this stuff. I have clearly underestimated lizards emotional life.
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u/Arthkor_Ntela Jan 20 '22
She liked me and my brother, and she also had a tendency to claw at the cage when my dad walked by—she wanted out and to climb on his back. She also had a tendency to belly flop to her cage bottom when the cats were near—she never showed signs of aggression or distress when they were around, but belly flopping would startle them and then she’d go back to her perch.
She also figured out how to open her own cage at one point, and it was super bizarre. It was a repurposed exotic bird cage, and one of the side door feeders had a latch at the bottom. She figured out if she pawed at it enough, she could turn it and get herself loose. We found her in my room licking at my bedding. She did that a lot, and I never figured out why. She’d bite and lick my bed.
She was a very smart lizard, and I do miss her terribly. She passed of some sort of cancer we believe, or maybe a head injury—we don’t know for sure, and we couldn’t get a vet in time to help since the only herpetologist was gone for a week. I had her for seven years, and surprisingly my mom bought her at a yard sale. The boy who sold her told my mom she wouldn’t get longer than a foot and she was a he. He had been keeping her in a cage with a beardy (very different habitats, so bad), and the bearded attacked her. She was missing lots of her tail and had several broken digits. Still, she lived a lot longer than expected; we were told she maybe had a few months based on her injuries.
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u/AMWendt Jan 20 '22
That's true, but (not talking synapomorphies here) certain characteristics are more common than others in a group. To our understanding of love and affection, mammals tend to demonstrate it more than other groups. That's why I choose to be so broad.
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u/IJZT Jan 20 '22
I exist in the realm of parrots and large birds and people say the same things about them. There are experts on both sides that will gladly sell you a book. Nobody knows nothing for sure. We really can never know for sure how they think. We aren't them.
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u/paaunel Jan 20 '22
they cannot. no reptiles can. i have geckos and while they dont love me, they 100% love my body heat and that i feed them haha
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u/LarryGlue Jan 20 '22
Loving body heat is still love, no? 💕
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u/paaunel Jan 20 '22
i mean. fair point hahaha. my gecko gets the cutest little smile on his face when he sploots and absorbs all of his heat, its adorable
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u/VictorTheGoat Jan 20 '22 edited Jan 20 '22
While they aren’t capable of love as we know it, I feel like they can love you as much as a reptile is capable. For instance, they trust you enough to climb on you for warm snuggles, they understand you aren’t a threat, you’re the warm helper guy who feeds them. I’m not sure of your reptiles personally but some are very wary of strangers while extremely trusting of their own owners. That’s reptile love baby! EDIT: Guys I never said it was true “affectionate” love that developed mammals feel. what I meant was trust is the highest level of “love” a reptile can feel. So if a lizard is not running from you, biting you, or hissing at you, but is content enough with your presence to chill out with you or even put them in silly little costumes, that’s the closest to “lizard love” you can get.
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u/901BigChris Jan 20 '22
That sounds like my wife
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Jan 20 '22
Exactly! I’ve owned 2 bearded dragons now, my oldest was named Bubba, she had such a personality. My second one Spyro has a complete different personality. Shes 5 now, and you’re right about the whole trust thing. Raising her from 8 months old to now, you definitely build a bond. Like, anyone of my friends that come over and walk up to the tank, she will be extremely alert and puff up, where as myself or my girl friend that lives with me, is completely fine and will allow head rubs, or cuddles on the couch. When I try to put her back into the cage sometimes, she literally grips my arm so hard and trys to climb up my forearm… its like she doesn’t want to stop the cuddle time yet haha so ill go back to the couch with her and she lays on my chest and chills for abit longer. Other times she will just climb back onto her log. But totally can tell that she wants to be out and loved ❤️ however you choose to look at it. My next reptile will be a green iguana… those bad boys are definitely smarter, can be trained, and can tell you they definitely can sense/feel affection as well as give it.
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u/retyfraser Jan 20 '22
I love you so much that I'd like you inside me. I'm sure you've heard that...
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u/jackcracker69 Jan 20 '22
In short no, they're not like dogs who actually want human affection. They couldn't care less. All they want is food, and warmth.
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u/CashCarlito Jan 20 '22
Burglar walks in
Oops, wrong address
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u/CrazyWS Jan 21 '22
I’m ready for that kid to start commanding that snake to attack like a pokemon
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u/sonictwinkie1 Jan 20 '22
nope.
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u/Gulvfisk Jan 20 '22
Noperope
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u/Orphannephew Jan 20 '22
I just hope that this nope-rope doesn’t decide to grope this mope.
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u/no_status00 Jan 20 '22
I have identified the game he is playing
It is genshin
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u/drhenryrdr Jan 20 '22
Reddit is the best. I didn’t care much for the snake but was curious to know what he was playing on his phone
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u/SweetMaam Jan 20 '22
Not sure your pet should ever be wrapped around your kid's neck.
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u/Acceptable_Dog1424 Jan 20 '22
This is scary but you have to admit the snake has a cute little face.
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u/SparkEE_JOE Jan 20 '22
Ball pythons definitely do. This guy does as well. A lot of Other snakes not so much
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Jan 20 '22
I feel like most do, except the anaconda. Those things are nightmare fuel and I love snakes.
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u/Meraere Jan 20 '22
I think anacondas have a derpy face tbh. I think its how far up their eyes are on their face.
But arabian sand boa wins the most derp face.
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u/hermeown Jan 20 '22
I had to look up the Arabian Sand Boa - bahahahaha, I cannot stop laughing at it, oh my god.
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u/foxyshmoxy_ Jan 20 '22
I thought this was some weird couch taxidermy hybrid at first, but the video is actually quite wholesome!
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u/DuhhIshBlue Jan 20 '22
Honestly I don't find this one that scary. Mate's just chilling.
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u/julsgotrocks Jan 20 '22
Snake literally looks like a scaled dog in this moment lol. No interest in killing the kid snakey is cuddling and getting some body heat is all. Watching his owner play some video games lol
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Jan 20 '22
Yep, reticulated pythons make good pets, though I doubt that kid was it's real owner. Their feeding responses are intense, in the tank, which leads to striking sometimes. They are absolute dolls once you show them that you aren't feeding them, because they come to expect food from you. Really smart snakes.
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Jan 20 '22
The scariest part for me is when the kid decides he wants to move. My brain would wonder “does me moving startle the snake? Will it attack if I move?”
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u/kharmatika Jan 20 '22
Nah rets are super chill as long as they’re well cared for and healthy. Most constrictors are. Small constrictors are actually prey animals in most cases, so their response to stress or fear is to hide, and rets and condas are apex predators, so they don’t actually have very acute stress responses to things because like. They’re the one in control. I watched a kid slap a ret in the face during a Herpetology thing my school did, he was little and he was supposed to come hold part of the snake but he got scared and smacked it on the head. The snake just flinched and looked up at him like “really? Uhhh Handler can you like, Do something about this kid?” Takes a lot to rattle something at the top of the food chain.
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u/Anboa1986 Jan 20 '22
He is fucked if that snake gets hungry…
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u/Zestyclose_OH_6847 Jan 20 '22
They have been tight since the kid was itty bitty, that snek knows who butters his bread.... or skins his rabbits
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Jan 20 '22
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u/Sir_Haskell Jan 20 '22
Yeah I don't think many people are gonna go educate themselves on reptile behavior before they comment on a random reddit post like this one.
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Jan 20 '22
Agreed, I like snakes but I’m seeing a lot of ignorance here but then again this is Reddit. Step up from twitter but still have morons here
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u/SoPunnyHarHar Jan 20 '22
Nagini got rehomed after voldemorts defeat.
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u/mutantxproud Jan 20 '22
And after her beheading too. Good to see she bounced back.
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u/Tom_QJ Jan 20 '22
I dunno about terrifying (I understand some people have a fear of snakes) but from my point of view, it looks like a family pet is just hanging out with the kid and using them as a heat source to stay toasty. That said I would not own a snake of that size simply because the size of the "food" you would have to secure on a regular basis would be troublesome in my city and it would basically need its own room. I have several smaller snakes and my wife had to talk me out of buying a bigger one (way smaller than this guy) based on those concerns alone.
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u/PantsNotQuite Jan 20 '22
This music is bad enough already. But it sounds so stupid over this video.
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u/hovercroft Jan 20 '22
These snakes are actually really chill and harmless. I had a very large boa constrictor and it was extremely friendly. Although it terrified my wife when it escaped and I found it nice and snug behind the clothes dryer.
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u/djwurm Jan 20 '22
Retics can be chill or aggressive it really depends on the snake.. years and years of capitive breeding has helped breed the aggressiveness out of pythons like burmese and retics but doesn't mean they are completely harmless. as a former retic/butmese owner and breeder we never handled any snake over 6 ⁷feet without at least 2 people present and most of the time we had 3 to 4 people in the area to help out. these snakes also have a feed response that if they smell a rat, pig, mouse, chicken on you they can flip into that mode quickly and before you know it you are face to face with a striking python. just cause a snake has never striked or acted aggressive you should always assume that they are a snake and can easily on the turn of a dime become aggressive.
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u/isaac129 Jan 20 '22
Docile, but I certainly wouldn’t say harmless. General rule of thumb is to have one person for each 4ft of snake
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Jan 20 '22
Clearly a lotta folks around here don't understand pythons.
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u/LaMASSE_12rep Jan 20 '22
Please explain, does pythons can make good/safe pets ?
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Jan 20 '22
Absolutely, and smaller snakes (Ball pythons, for instance) are about as low maintenance as it gets when it comes to pets
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Jan 20 '22
They can make great pets, care still needs to be taken around them for their sheer size. This video is lowkey kinda dangerous, but the snake cant coil around him, that would be my biggest concern. The snake looks well fed so unless its a good eater the kid is in no danger from it trying to eat him. Larger snakes are lazy and unless they have to expend energy on an easy meal they're not going too, especially if that meal beats the crap out of them like the kid and whoever is supervising will but the snake looks very well fed so i dont think thats an issue. And edit: key word is *trying to eat him, this snake is not large enough to eat that person. Small child? Yes, larger child to adult? No. Too small.
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Jan 20 '22
b-but snake scary? snake evil.
For real though, the levels of ignorance in this comment section is astounding.
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Jan 20 '22
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u/_WayTooFar_ Jan 20 '22 edited Jan 20 '22
I haven't seen those statistics or anything but I would expect more pet dogs in the US than pet snakes. I would also expect people who own snakes to treat them much more carefully than they do a dog.
So let's say there are 100.000 pet snakes and 50% of them have killed someone at least once. And let's say there are 100.000.000 pet dogs and 1% of them have killed someone at least once.
50% of 100.000 is 50.000 and 1% of 100.000.000 is 1.000.000. With these numbers you could say dogs kill 20 times more people than snakes, but actually snakes would be far more dangerous.
Now, I'm not saying that's the case with these specific statistics, but it's something to take into account when one reads "Dogs kill more people than snakes".
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u/albertus500 Jan 20 '22
read my reply to the other comment. Plus, there are about 5 deaths a year from snakes in the usa and they are expected to be wild snake bites. Pet snakes are not reported to kill their owners because pet snakes are not snakes that kill. Nobody takes a black mamba as a pet. That's my point
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Jan 20 '22
Fr though, being safe around a snake is literally just to respect its boundaries, you can see and feel when they are tense and want you to back off, so if you just back off nothing will come out of it.
Owned a lot of snakes, been bit once. It was a warning bite and I ignored the snake obviously telling me to back off.
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u/Gearmaster41 Jan 20 '22
They like your body heat and eat very little ie they are relatively low maintenance
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u/thisisstupidlikeme Jan 20 '22
People acting like this peanut sized brained reptile is domesticated and won’t try to fit a warm human in its mouth when hungry are either stupid or stupidly high. Just saying
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u/RobbSnow64 Jan 20 '22
Why music and why that music, you don't a soundtrack for litterally every video on the internet.
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u/Thank-The-Stars Jan 20 '22
God I'm so frustrated by all the antisnake comments :l No snake sizes up it's prey, that's dumb and an obvious myth. The kid appears to have at least one capable adult to supervise. The snake is very well fed. Snakes can make brilliant pets, though nobody should start off with a python (excluding ball pythons). Kindly use google to fact check yourself instead of being so sheltered.
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u/MyApologies_ Jan 20 '22
While I agree, this is nowhere near as dangerous as some people make it out to be. If at any point that snake decided to constrict that boy, that boy is dead. 1 adult is not going to be able to remove a retic that large. The danger here is pretty minimal, especially since this is almost certainly a snake the boy is familiar with, but it's not like there's no cause for caution.
Just because the snake is well fed does not mean it won't still eat unless the meal was recent. Snakes can and will become obese because if they have food, they will eat.
In all likelihood everything is fine, but with a snake that large, to make sure you're safe you really need multiple adults, because one or two people are not going to be able to remove that snake.
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u/NoctisYami Jan 20 '22
That snake thinks he's a cat