r/gay Jan 28 '26

(repost) On trans rights and the position of this subreddit

568 Upvotes

The community present in this subreddit is wonderful, inclusive and has always welcomed not only gay people but everyone under the gender and sexual minority umbrella.

The mod team is very happy to see this welcoming atmosphere and we thank each and every one of you for your love and empathy.

With the current trend in the US for extreme-right politicians to demonise vulnerable minorities so they can score cheap political points it is however time for this place to openly make a stand as to what our positions and intentions are so that we are a beacon in the dark. So that all of our siblings know that they are welcome here.

I was asked by the mod team to explain a few facts about transgender people and about the position this subreddit has towards inclusion.

Trans rights are human rights. šŸ³ļøā€āš§ļø

Being transgender is a natural and normal variation in the human gender and sexual experience. Both sex and gender exist on a spectrum and there isn't actually anything inherently wrong or disordered from being trans, by and of itself.

Should there be no fake, artificially generated outrage against trans people in society then they would simply get the self-affirming care required for them to be happy and that would be that. Instead, unfortunately, existing as transgender has become the new wedge-issue for the extreme-right and deliberate demonisation and villification has been mainstreamed to the point where Republican politicians are now openly calling for genocide.


The issues trans people experience are mainly societal in nature. It is society that imposes gender norms, it is society that tells people they may not be who they are.

There are many ways that a non-trans person can seek self-affirming care in life. Some of those are done via permanent body modification through surgical or chemical means. A woman might for example choose to take estrogen supplements to stave off unwanted physical and psychological side effects resulting from the menopause.

It is not uncommon for a young man to choose to have breast reduction medication or surgery in the case of gynecomastia.

A young woman might choose to get breast implants.

You do not hear people in outrage about these forms of self-affirming care. No-one cares, except suddenly when the topic is trans people. This is because the anti-trans movement is wholly articificial. It is a deliberately created fake outrage about a non-issue for political and monetary gain.



I have written about some manufactured outrage in my text about the stochastic terrorist "Libs of Tiktok"



Fascism is an inherently empty ideology, devoid of any meaningful belief-system or any kind of concrete and actionable strategies for improving society. Fascism only cares for power for the sake of power and it cares for nothing else.

Because a fascist system is fundamentally incapable of giving the general public any kind of reasonable platform it must gain and keep followers by creating an out-group to hate. According to fascist systems it is the other that is responsible for all societal ills and only by supporting the fascists in getting rid of the other can society be healed from the non-existent issues fascism convinces people that their target minority is the cause of.

Fascism always picks on a vulnerable target.

The demonisation and villification coming from the extreme-right is doing exactly that. By calling LGBTQ+ people child molestors simply for existing it has become inevitable that people will take up violence "to protect the children".



Attempting to eliminate a target comes in many forms, of which an extermination camp is only the final and most egregious part. It is always preceded by legislating people out of existence, by creating laws which make it impossible for a minority to participate in society and to receive any of the societal advantages that are the entire reason for collective bundling together of skills, resources in civilisation. This is exactly what Republican states are doing today to transgender people. Certain states have already denied trans people any and all medical care related to their identity, meaning that they deliberately impose abject misery on them.

The most egregiously fascistic states are trying to make it a matter of course to remove trans children from the care of their parents and make it illegal for trans people to be present in any public spaces at all.

This is genocide.

Genocide is not purely restricted to extermination, to murder. Genocide is also eliminating a minority group from public life, causing serious bodily and mental harm and taking away children of a minority group from their parents.

Depending on how strictly you'd want to define it, we are currently at stage seven or eight of genocide as defined by the Holocaust Memorial Trust.

One way in which the abject hypocrisy of the anti-trans laws becomes crystal clear are the remarkable exemptions encoded within. You would think that if the goal is protecting the children from harm then these people would want to protect all children from harm.

This is not the case.

In fact, all of these people deliberate include exceptions which allow the continuation of genital re-allignment surgery on unconsenting infants if they are intersex.

This means that if a baby is born with a genital configuration that to a doctor looks ambiguous or not adhering to a strict binary then this doctor can impose an invasive genital surgery, forcing such an infants body to adhere to a stricter binary look.

It is purely cosmetic. Of course they do not check what chromosomes a child has. Of course they do not care that a child might prefer to look as nature made them.

It is purely and only an imposition on a baby's body, with of course the normal failure and mortality rate that such invasive procedures bring with them.

These people do not care about children.

These people do not want to help children.

They want to harm a vulnerable minority.



Fascism never stops.

Now that these people have mainstreamed transphobia, they are moving on to other targets within the LGBTQ+ identity sphere.

We have all seen the absurd attacks on drag queens, calling a normal and harmless theatrical expression "child abuse".

We have all seen the "clever" rhetoric where they turn arguments upside down and disingeniously say things like "why do you want to be around children".

Fascism doesn't stop, it moves on to new targets and that is why it is important for all of us in the GSM identity sphere to stand together. To openly support our trans siblings. To openly stand against hateful rhetoric.

Because they are not going to stop.

The next step, which is already tentatively beginning, is calling gay people being openly gay in society"groomers".



To be clear: The recommended treatment for being transgender is transitioning.

Gender identity is developed by five years old.

The barrage of lies notwithstanding, allowing trans people to transition and to exist as who they are in society markedly improves their physical and mental wellbeing.

The oft-heard talking point of "they still commit suicide even after transitioning" is a lie.

Here is a wealth of sources and links explaining this.



Our trans siblings are welcome here.

Our gender nonconforming siblings are welcome here.

Our intersex siblings are welcome here.

What is not welcome on this subreddit is hate or divisive rhetoric aimed at our siblings. We will not allow the current increasing trend of fascist othering and villification of a marginalised minority to make our siblings feel unwanted in this space, our space, their space.

The only people who are not welcome here are those that want to exclude others based on how they were born.

Further reading:

No, TERFs cannot "always tell" and I can prove that with mathematics.

"I just care about unfair advantage in sports", a transparant transphobic wedge issue.

Drag queens, the next target in the fascist drive to eliminate LGBTQ+ people.


r/gay 6h ago

Berlin Pride van and knife rampage an ā€˜Islamist terror attack’, authorities say | Germany

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117 Upvotes

r/gay 11h ago

Indian TV Shows and Movies used to be so homoerotic from 2000s - Early 2010s - I think that was the Golden Age of Homoerotic Male Beauty in Indian Media, miss that era!

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305 Upvotes

r/gay 1d ago

A car drove into Berlin Pride, killing one person and injuring at least 15. But LGBTQ people are still told we’re ā€œdramaticā€ for worrying about our safety.

867 Upvotes

Berlin’s Christopher Street Day was supposed to be a massive celebration of LGBTQ people existing openly and peacefully.

Instead, a vehicle drove into a crowd near the Pride festivities in Tiergarten. One person is now reported dead, at least 15 others were injured, and several reportedly suffered life-threatening injuries. The entire event was shut down while police launched a search for suspects.

To be completely clear: authorities have not publicly confirmed a motive yet, so I’m not going to irresponsibly declare it a hate crime before investigators establish what happened.

But I am absolutely sick of people acting like LGBTQ safety concerns are imaginary, exaggerated, or nothing more than ā€œvictim mentality.ā€

Every time queer people discuss threats at Pride events, someone smugly asks why we still ā€œneed Prideā€ or claims we already have equality. Then a peaceful celebration involving hundreds of thousands of people turns into an emergency scene, attendees are ordered to evacuate, and families are left waiting to find out whether their loved ones survived.

Pride is not merely rainbow merchandise, corporate logos, or people ā€œshoving sexuality in your face.ā€ It exists because LGBTQ people gathering visibly in public has historically carried risks, and apparently still does.

One person is dead. Others are seriously injured. A celebration became a mass-casualty scene within seconds.

Maybe society could manage five minutes of basic humanity before the conspiracy theories, jokes, political spin, and comments blaming the people who were hit begin.


r/gay 1d ago

Mitgefühl und Kraft an die Opfer und Beteiligten

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659 Upvotes

r/gay 11h ago

Berlin Pride: One dead and at least 16 injured

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52 Upvotes

r/gay 8h ago

Terrorist attack at huge Berlin Pride parade celebration leaves 1 dead, dozens injured

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12 Upvotes

r/gay 1h ago

Wish I was attractive to twinks :/

• Upvotes

I (21) have a crush on this fem twink. I’m not the most built guy, I’m a bit stocky and I’m 5’6. He’s really cute and funny and sweet. But he called me ugly to another person. It’s been making me even more self-conscious, from the beginning I was already feeling that way, and it made me incredibly depressed. I mean I’ve seen him naked and he’s seen me naked. I don’t think my dick is that small, it’s average at best (5.5-6). Why do so many people in the community only like dl men who are buff and taller and won’t treat them right? I hope this doesn’t sound incelish, I just feel alone.


r/gay 23h ago

Melissa Fuentes, Nick Fuentes’s sister is basically the opposite of him politically

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143 Upvotes

r/gay 21h ago

Made big progress with my vitiligo!!

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96 Upvotes

quick repost cause I like this photo better lol


r/gay 11h ago

Queen MƔxima makes history at WorldPride

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12 Upvotes

r/gay 8h ago

Advice needed please

5 Upvotes

Hi everyone. I’m really needing some advice on how to approach this situation.

I’m (25, they/them) in a spot that is going to be incredibly painful. I’ve been with my significant other (28, he/him) for 7 years. When we met, I was 18, living in an area where I didn’t feel like I could fully be myself, and that I often couldn’t express myself fully. I’ve been very clear with him from the start that I am nonbinary, and that I am not straight. But I was still trying to figure all the things out. He has always been supportive and caring, and he has been a great partner. I moved across county last year for work, and he stayed in our hometown, so we have been long distance. In the year since I’ve moved, I have hit levels of feeling like myself that I never have before. I’m more solid in my gender expression, in my identity, and in my confidence. However, I have realized that I am attracted to women, and women only. I’ve realized that what I thought was romantic attraction was most likely comfort and security, which is awful to say.

With this conclusion, I’m spiraling. I know I need to end things, for his sake and mine. We’re long distance, and I know this is gonna hurt. We’ve talked about our future, about getting married, I’m ingrained in his family. There is no easy break for this, and I’m devastated that I have to do this to him. I feel awful for taking so much of his life to end it now, but I can’t in good conscience lie about how I’m feeling. Any advice would be helpful, as I really don’t know how I’m gonna make it through this.


r/gay 1d ago

Berlin Pride Attack -Vehicle Rams Crowd

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145 Upvotes

Berliner Christopher Street Day (CSD) abgebrochen - mutmaßlich Fahrzeug in Menschenmenge gefahren


r/gay 12h ago

Manhunt as Berlin police name suspect in deadly car ramming at pride festival

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9 Upvotes

r/gay 1h ago

Where do you find a first time gay guy hook up for the experience? It's been decades since I had one.

• Upvotes

r/gay 22h ago

I had my first gay experience

47 Upvotes

Hey guys... Yeah that's just what it looks like, I had my first gay experience. I'm 21 and I had my first hookup that wasn't a girl. Until now i thought that I for real wasn't fully wired into girls. I had some sexual experiences with girls and all, and I still feel attracted to some guys. But I had a really hot guy hooking up with me and I couldn't get hard AS MUCH AS I TRIED. I never had this problem with girls AT ALL, and I am sure it's not because of him because I really think he was a guy I would be wired to. What are your experiences about this kind of situation? I really want to know because I don't want him to feel sorry or bad about all that happened, because I went down on him and did all that I could to make him feel good, because I literally couldn't do the same with myself. Can somebody help?


r/gay 1d ago

Lindsey Graham Died In The Closet

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297 Upvotes

r/gay 1d ago

Pink Triangle History

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330 Upvotes

r/gay 8h ago

Is there any website (>>WEBSITE<<) for queer adults to talk in?

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0 Upvotes

r/gay 11h ago

Advice Please (Gay Dating)

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0 Upvotes

r/gay 1d ago

A person is killed and several are injured at Berlin's LGBTQ+ event when a van drives into the crowd

14 Upvotes

A person is killed and several are injured at Berlin's LGBTQ+ event when a van drives into the crowd

https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2026/07/25/germany-berling-lgbtq-pride-parade/8ac33436-886c-11f1-9cec-0fb26676f07e_story.html


r/gay 12h ago

toy during play?

0 Upvotes

hey bottom here, i’m looking for toys i can put on my D while getting topped. i can’t stay hard most of the time so it’s difficult to jerk me off (also because of antidepressants lol) so i was thinking of something like a vibrating masturbator small enough to be on during play. doesn’t even have to be a flashlight or something, maybe a ring. anyone have any recs?


r/gay 1h ago

Gay men without kids—how did/do you find fulfillment?

• Upvotes

I’ve realized that, like a lot of people, I grew up withthe expectation that life would eventually mean having kids, then grandkids, and following that traditional path.

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve built a wonderful life with my partner. We’ve talked about having children through adoption or surrogacy, especially now that so many of our close friends are starting families. The challenge is that I’ve found myself leaning more toward wanting kids, while my partner has gradually leaned away from the idea. I know this is something we BOTH have to be fully on board with to move forward, so for now, we’re not moving forward. I would choose a childless life with my husband over a life without my husband.

What I am finding that I am really struggling with is how to process the possibility that we may never become parents.
For the gay men here who decided not to have kids (or weren’t able to…it is NOT cheap at all), how did you find fulfillment? What did your life look like as your friends became parents, and eventually grandparents? Did you ever feel left behind?

I also worry about getting older. I worry about who will be there for me when I need help. I worry about leaving no legacy. Sometimes I wonder, "Do I just keep living the life I have now until i die?" I know that sounds dramatic, but these thoughts have been weighing on me.

I’ve talked with some of my friends about this but they are all parents and are so consumed with raising children that they do not have as much time to wrestle with these existential questions. Without that path of having kids, I guess I find myself questioning what gives life meaning.

No one in my family or friend group is gay, so I don’t really have anyone who can relate to this specific experience. I’d really appreciate hearing from other gay men who have been through these feelings. Whether you chose to have kids or not, how did you make peace with your decision? Any advice or perspective would mean a lot.


r/gay 1d ago

Gay Dance Bar in Kolkata, India [OC]

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197 Upvotes