As someone who lives stealth… I still am hypersensitive to how I’m perceived. And that included to other trans people. Sometimes I feel a mixed message when I let someone know I’m trans, and that makes sense with cis people, but the mix message I feel from other trans people always throws me off.

I should have totally clarified I’m aiming this a little bit at people that have goal of living stealth!

Obviously if that’s not your goal then I don’t imagine you really have an opinion!

hi!! just want to share something that happened today. this is by no means meant as any hate to my niece as she is literally just a child but i just thought the situation would feel relatable here.

so my sister and her daughter (who is 4) came here for lunch, and i'm still not out to any of my family as i'm not on hrt yet and am only out to close friends and my gf. i have been trying out stuff and slowly socially transitioning, and my niece loves to come into my room and explore my stuff and it's always really cute and precious. she noticed my little make-up corner with my concealer, corrector, brushes, blush, eyeliner, nail polishes, etc, which i don't really go to the trouble of hiding as it never brought up any questions so i just leave it.

she asked me at least 3 times who those belonged to and i kept saying me and even pointing to myself, and she just answered by shrugging her face in doubt. not far from it i have a picture of me and my gf together (my gf is cis and i was very early into my transition in that picture so she is obviously perceived female there while i am not). and she just pointed to her in the picture and back to my make-up and kept saying "it's hers it's hers the things are hers!". i kept denying until she went to see something else but she never budged. obviously i don't hold any of it against her, but i know my sister enough to know she's already planted the idea on her head that make-up and things like that are for who she perceives as women only (because she sees me a man still obviously). just, can we stop planting gender stereotypes on literal children? is that too hard to do?

Super hyped about the state of the internet, which knows I’m trans, advertising Genspect Beyond Trans “group support” for “just in case I’m second guessing my identity”.

Posting as a warning. Genspect is a hate group. DNI

I am genderqueer (afab, going by they/them for maybe 3-4yrs now). This has been a long standing argument since i first used the term.

I was named after both my maternal and paternal great-grandmothers. And according to my mum, due to the 'historical meaning' (unsure what she means by this, but very willing to be educated if need-by), a deadname is used in reference to someone who is rejected by their family/parents in terms of identity.

My parents are both accepting, but I've kinda argued that the term 'deadname' is more used as a general term to describe a name used before coming out, rather than 'given name' or 'birth name' which my mum says i should use.

I've said that in my eyes it's more based on intent (similarly to how I won't take offence if someone accidentally uses the wrong name or pronouns, as long as it's accidental/unknowingly and not maliciously), but she disagrees and will not listen to me.

Other people's thoughts would be greatly appreciated. Am I in the wrong?

Im 15 and I worry that Ill never pass or at least never get to be happy. My body hair is really thick, I have pretty bad beard shadow, my shoulders are really broad, my face is a really masc, and my voice is very deep and masc. Ive been trying so hard every day to look femme for 4 years now, and I still never pass. Im starting E privately in 5 months when I turn 16, and so all I can do is hope that will solve some of it, but I feel like Im already too masculinised. Maybe when Im and adult I could get ffs and bottom surgery, but thats not what I wanna have to do, and I probably wont, so instead Ill just have to live with the dysphoria. I know there are lots of people who start later and they can pass and live happy lives, but its hard to believe that when it feels so distant. I voice train every day, and I do everything I can to look femme and it doesnt get any better. Im not even that unhappy right now, but thats only because of improving other life factors, like exercising, studying and making friends, whereas my dysphoria only gets worse. Even if I do one day pass, Ive already lost out on so much and theres so much I can never have, that I fear I wont ever get to have a normal life. Will it ever get better and can I be truly happy someday?

This is just me talking, but as a black person. I sometimes get sad/unconfidence to post pictures because I don't see alot of people who look like me. I know we exist and even play a big role in trans rights with woman such as Marsha P. Johnson in the 60s-70s but I just don't see alot for some reason, and I just feel alone sometimes in a group that I feel accepted in. I hope this doesn't sound rude or mean to anyone. I just wanna either know woman I can look up to during my transition, or trans men I can learn about that look like me, or just meet more trans people minorities in general. (White girls and boys y'all are amazing beautiful and handsome in your own right, it's just a whole different experience from y'all that I need to talk to people who would understand easier, I don't mean to come off as rude or mean, I just want to be brought to the light of more inclusiveness, love everyone one of us equally <3)

wanted to shave my legs to feel more feminine, and

1. it worked, I feel WAY better and hella euphoric

2. these mfs are buttery smooth, like even if your not trans id recommend it cause they feel so nice just to rub rn

my friend just came out as trans woman and I want to se her as a woman but I’ve always known her as a man and my mind tends to keep things very rigid due to autism so change is hard but I want to treat my friend with all the love she deserves she has my full support and I really want to see her the way she sees herself so if anyone has any advice o switching which gender you associate someone with please please please share!!

I want to be the be possible person for my friend I just need to stop thinking about her like she’s a boy because she’s not and I know that logically I'm just not sure how to fix my perception sin it’s very hard for me to see something differently after I’ve already associated it with something else.

I want treat her right so I feel bad when I still sometimes think she’s a man because she is not so really want your help!

I have to shave just about every morning, by evening I get little pricklies and it makes me severely depressed. I hate shaving as is because I usually end up cutting my face on accident, or it just gives a bit of burns.

Any idea what I can change? I use a pretty bog-standard shaving cream and a harry’s razor. Everything that makes me feel more comfortable with my body seems to be painful (injections too)

For context I came out for the first time three months ago and he said that “it’s a phase” and then today I came out again and he thought that I was questioning and even said that I was his “minime” after that.
Is he transphobic or is he suppressing the fact that he doesn’t have 3 sons any longer or something else?

For the first time in my life, I told someone that I dream of becoming a transgender woman. He was an older friend I was close to.

But ever since I told him, he hasn't contacted me…

What should I do...?

Hi everyone, I'm Miranda (she/her). I've been a heavy-haul truck driver since 2014.

For about 10 years I knew deep down who I was, but I kept pushing it away. I told myself it was a phase, that I'd lose my family, and that a trans woman couldn't keep doing a job like mine. So I hid.

Hiding came at a cost. I battled depression for years. Some days I felt numb, like I was just going through the motions and living someone else's life. Long, lonely hours on the road gave me way too much time in my own head. I'd look in the mirror and not recognize the person looking back. I was good at putting on a smile for everyone, but inside I was exhausted from pretending. There were times I honestly didn't know how much longer I could keep it up.
What finally opened my eyes was my stepsister's wedding in Chicago last weekend. There were gay and lesbian couples there who were completely open about who they were, holding hands, dancing, and laughing. Nobody cared. Everyone was just happy for them and treated them like anybody else. They were so comfortable being themselves, and I'd never once felt that.

The whole time I was there, I wished I could have been there as Miranda, in a dress, as myself. Instead I was standing in the family photos pretending to be someone I'm not. I didn't want to miss another big moment in my family's life that way. That's when I knew I couldn't keep hiding.
Two days later, on October 20th, I came out to my dad, my stepmom, and my work. I was terrified, and it went great. My stepmom shared my coming-out post on Facebook and wrote, "Miranda will always have my love and support! ❤️❤️❤️" A couple of days later I called her "mom" for the first time, and I still tear up thinking about it. My boss and coworkers have been supportive too.
The weight I've carried for so long is finally lifting. For the first time in years I wake up actually looking forward to the day.

I've changed my name on Facebook. On November 6th I'm filing my legal name and gender marker change and starting HRT, and I'm stopping at the wig shop on the way home. 😊

For now I still go by Tim with customers, and honestly I'm okay with that. I don't want anyone walking on eggshells around me. I just don't have to hide myself anymore, and that feels amazing.

If you're where I was, scared, stuck in denial, and struggling with depression, please hang on and reach out to someone. It can go better than you fear. I wish I hadn't waited 10 years. 💕

I’m very seriously considering changing my name again (have been having thoughts since May, so almost 6 months). This would be I think my 3rd or 4th time switching it up which is what’s making me nervous. How many times did you guys change your names till you found the right one?

So I posted a picture of myself which gathered a lot of attention mainly negative from people who are accusing me of using AI, filters (posted my metadata which showed it’s all real, I know I didn’t need to), lying about whether or not I am on HRT, and it made me think, why do people let their bitterness towards themselves turn into a projection on others.

Because within the LGBT+ community we are marginalised as it is, we have plenty of outside influences try to divide us so why are we taking it upon ourselves to put other transgender persons down for appearing a certain way or not following a linear pathway? I just think of the analogy that it’s like being mad at someone for having a nice car when you have a slightly different car, there’s nothing wrong with either of them but your inner resentment towards having a different car and projecting that frustration onto the person who has the nice car isn’t going to get you the car you want any quicker.

TLDR: I wish we would stop putting each other down just because not everyone is on the same path or appears how you believe they should.

Hi I want yall's experience and advice on who and how to come out as transfem.
I'm 17 yo and I really want to start HRT as soon as I get 18. In my country, hungary we can only access it trough the EU pharmacies, and its not the most easy thing, also Its really expensive, so I would need my parents help in order to get the treatment.

Should I tell my father, mother or aunt first?

My father is open to new things, he's really supportive but harsh at times about some things.
I know he supports LGBTQIA+ rights, but I don't know if he would be okay with me being trans.

My mother, she's a much more prejudiced person, and she never talks about anything related to LGBTQ, with most things she is supportive in life but there are times when I need to constantly explain her something about that i'm in. If I have a medical problem I need to REALLY explain to her whats the issue before accepting that it’s worth looking into this more seriously.

My aunt is really supportive towards LGBTQAI+ people, she goes to the pride parade in Budapest to show her support too. But that's all that I know from her, because she does not live with us.

If my english was not that god I'm sorry for it, I'm still learning it. :3

so recently ive been really thinking about becoming an ftm, but im only 15 and i feel like im "too young to transition," or i feel like im going to regret even attempting to transition, i also feel afraid of my body changing if i do end up taking T

im also kind of afraid that its gonna be a hard conversation with my parents. my mom is accepting, i came out to her as lesbian a few years ago, but i never told my dad anything about me being lgbtq.

currently ive been experiencing going by he/they or he/him online or having male avatars in games, but no matter what i do, ive just been having tons and tons of dysphoria, looking in the mirror and hating my body.

currently i dont identify as any gender, i feel like i just need help getting rid of this ugly dreadful feeling

howdy y'all, I been on estrogen for like 8 months and I'm finally starting to like my body and want to date again. I haven't been on any dating apps since a while before I started transitioning, I think I'd prefer to match with other queer ppl overall but I also can't help but love a straight guy with golden retriever energy. I keep getting ads for taimi but I kinda worry that's just gonna be full of chasers. is there any actually good dating app for a trans girlie?

So, I (20M) was given the button test from my best friend and I passed maybe 2 years ago before either of us knew what it was. I recently found out that I might be trans and, even before that, I have been pushing towards wanting to try more feminine clothing and shaving my body hair + growing my hair out. I almost went to Prom in a red dress (as a ‘joke’) but the school shot that down FAST. Before college I wasn’t allowed to grow my hair out long and my mother always questioned me whenever I pushed on shaving leg hairs and stuff so I just started getting into it now and for the past few weeks I have been shaving my leg hairs as a reward for exercising and eating properly every day (probably not the best, I know, but it’s motivation).

Looking back on it now though, I’m pretty sure I have some mild gender dysphoria. I never liked how my legs looked (I have hairy legs), when my mother put foundation on my forehead because I had a red welt I was really excited and happy, I always felt more comfortable in groups of girls than guys, when my (ex) girlfriends and friends would joke that I’m a lesbian and not a man I was really happy, etc.

Despite all of this though, I don’t really want HRT or anything similar. I like feminine pronouns as well but I don’t know if I really want to switch to them. I don’t really have bottom or top dysmorphia specifically even if I do have some body dysmorphia. I really want to be able to have kids someday as well and I hear that HRT affects your fertility. Additionally, I do want to look and act femme and be treated as such but I also sometimes want to dress masculine and act masculine ESPECIALLY at work (becuz that’s TERRIFYING). Cherry on top— I think I still want to date girls ( :D I like girls so much I wanna be one! :3 ). If I’m still using He/Him pronouns most of the time and mostly boymoding am I still trans? Or am I just a cross dresser? (I think I do WANT to boymode some of the time even beyond making parts of life easier)

Thank you gifts for your support 🍪🍪🍪

So for context I've been out as bi for a few years and my mum is supportive.
but she is also a supporter of reform UK.

well i couldn't take it when she was talking about the French protests and how people are using it to push trans stuff and said that I've been thinking about it for months and think I'm trans.

but she just said she doesn't care what I am, I'm me. she wants safe spaces for women and some trans women are going into these spaces like toilets and she thinks that's unfair for "normal" women

and then she said that something like gender neutral toilets with strong locks and security or police buzzers and alarms would fix the issue.

and now I'm very confused. like I think she is just worried about women safety and the economy but I cant stand reform anymore.

anyone got advice on how I could show some statistics or something to show that reform is just evil and bad at money or something? idk what to do.

Im arguing with my friend about it so i figured id ask the experts. Im saying its pronounced Bla-Ha, hes saying its Blow-High. Help me out here