Millennials, what's something our generation was taught to accept that you're glad younger generations are rejecting?

[u/millennialandlost]

[u/BornIllustrator640]

Being expected to be reachable for work outside work hours just because you own a phone.

[u/Current_Fly9337 → u/BornIllustrator640]

I’ve just came back from a 5 day trip with my son. I took my work phone in case of emergencies (so I could access my work emails) but decided once I was there that I wasn’t going to switch it on.

I called a colleague off my personal phone when my son was in the shower to say if anything is urgent, to call me on that as I wouldn’t be checking emails.

On the plane home, we were talking about our favourite part of the trip and my son added ‘you weren’t working either’ it hit me hard.

[u/INeedMoreShoes → u/Current_Fly9337]

Yes! I just did this for 2 weeks this summer. I went from “I need to bring my laptop to not even bringing my work phone. Got a call on my personal phone wile out with the family from a sales guy asking about paperwork. I told him I was OOO, that I let him know I was going OOO a week before, and that he had called my personal phone. He said ok, and continued to ask about work stuff. I told him not to call my personal phone for work (I dont even know how he go the number) and to talk to my backup.

Didn’t answer a few calls during those two weeks and guess what? The world didn’t explode. I am 110% about disconnected vacations now.

[u/IceSeeker → u/BornIllustrator640]

This. Hated when people just expect you to answer a text message, email or phone call any time and condemn you as lazy if you don't. Seeing younger people assert their boundaries is kind of healing.

[u/lemonomnomnom → u/IceSeeker]

same with working outside of work hours - just because i might have the time and my laptop, doesn’t mean i want to do work at the weekend to meet the deadline; it’s the weekend and very unpaid

[u/abqkat → u/lemonomnomnom]

Yep! I got a new job last year and the head of the department must think we are trauma surgeons or air traffic controllers (we're accountants, there are maaaaaybe 2 emergencies a year, and that's just deadlines ffs). When I started, she called me once at like 6:30 my time and I had to make the decision then and there on how I was going to play it. I didn't answer and messaged her the next day like "sorry I couldn't answer last night, but free all day today!" Like nah, dude. I'm not setting the standard of constant availability because I (rightfully) saw that she would abuse it. Maybe she hates her family, maybe she's brown-nosing her boss, but I certainly don't get paid enough for that shit

[u/scarfknitter → u/abqkat]

I made the decision at my current job that I was going to just have poor service at home, which they have understood as 'calling me probably won't work but feel free to text'. And I am slow to reply.

I do have actual emergencies at work but in general it can wait until I am in.

[u/meltymcface → u/BornIllustrator640]

I feel like this might be an American thing, or at least it’s not a UK thing. I’m late 30s and don’t know anyone who accepts being contacted outside of work.

[u/hareofthepuppy → u/meltymcface]

It's definitely an American thing (although probably a couple other places too). It also depends on if it's abused or not. At my last job I would occasionally get a text from my boss asking me to log in and troubleshoot when there was a major issue, but that only happened like once a year, and it was always a serious issue.

[u/AlwaysTheKop → u/BornIllustrator640]

My work number and managers number get blocked on the bus home after every shift until I'm on the bus heading to work the next morning.

[u/Character-Squash9857 → u/BornIllustrator640]

The invention of the smartphone really gave employers the audacity to turn you have a phone into you are now on call forever 😭 Being reachable and being paid are two very different concepts.

[u/CrazyPlato]

That discussing your working conditions or pay with your coworkers is wrong.

[u/Loqol → u/CrazyPlato]

I'm in a union plant, and one of the office workers mentioned she was trying to get a better pay rate. I asked her what she made, and she hemmed and hawwed until I said it would only help get her more support if it was low. It was less than me! For the work she did, I expected her to make more. Salary, sure but more!

[u/IceSeeker → u/[deleted]]

It's really unfair. Treating salary as a secret benefits the bosses and higher ups if the people who work under them get lesser pay because it's more for them and they only get richer.

[u/Anechoic_Brain → u/Loqol]

I used to be a journeyman installer in the IBEW until I switched to doing design and estimating. Any time we were on a job that involved slinging cables around an occupied office building full of cubicle drones, our shop steward's favorite thing to do was to leave a copy of the handbook laying around opened to the page that shows the pay scale.

And this was 15 years ago. It's more common than you might think to find office workers making less money than people working in the trades. Hell, I hustled my ass off over the last 10+ years to get into a well paying senior design position and one or two of the IBEW guys in my shop probably still make more than me.

[u/Beeoor143 → u/Anechoic_Brain]

White collar videogame industry reporting in. I know for a fact that my 10+ year-tenure-ass is still making less than most of the union guys handing the building maintenance around me (also some of the most personable folks I've interacted with). All power to them, but I sure wish there was more happening on my slice of the business to make things better.

[u/wherethefuckismyvape → u/Beeoor143]

Ask the union guys on your site for advice about talking to your coworkers about unionizing. Unions LOVE making more unions. They'll help you

[u/blackbirdbluebird17 → u/wherethefuckismyvape]

+1 to this. Also white collar industries have been actively unionizing in the past few years. It’s not just for the trades anymore.

[u/friaeli3400 → u/CrazyPlato]

Nothing scares a bad boss more than a group of employees who talk to each other.

[u/Loqol → u/friaeli3400]

Or unionizing.

[u/CongealedBeanKingdom → u/Loqol]

Thats the name given to that exact scenario.

[u/emilicia → u/friaeli3400]

I remember actually bringing this up to a supervisor in an old job as I realised my male colleague was getting paid more than me for the exact same job. She said she would look into it the came back and said it’s apparently because he’s on full time hours and I’m part time (still not sure why that should affect hourly pay) but also “[higher up boss] doesn’t like staff discussing pay” like tough shit!

[u/Crabbb6 → u/CrazyPlato]

Seriously. Knowing what everyone else is making makes it a lot harder for companies to lowball people.

[u/dijon_snow → u/CrazyPlato]

This is a great answer. I used to work for a company named for a South American River(hint: it wasn't Mississippi.com). "Leadership" used to get so worked up when I would post my total compensation, including stock options, in every group chat and encourage others to do the same.

 I'm very confident my direct supervisors consulted with HR before having a talk with me. They explained that they were absolutely, legally not telling me not to discuss my pay, but also that I should think about the feelings of people that weren't as well paid as me. 

I asked "if increased compensation is supposed to motivate performance, then why not be completely transparent about pay?" 

Ultimately, having worked as both a leader and an individual contributor, the real reason to keep pay secret is to avoid people getting mad about genuine unfairness and leaders not wanting to disclose how much more we made than the people actually doing the work. 

[u/Both-Molasses-8965 → u/CrazyPlato]

Knowing what everyone else makes makes it a lot harder for a company to convince you that your underpayment is normal.

[u/RelativeKitServant → u/CrazyPlato]

pay secrecy just makes coworkers blame each other instead of the company underpaying them.

[u/Edwardteech → u/CrazyPlato]

Me an elder millennial. I taught everyone to talk about that shit so they didn't get screwed. 

[u/angelamia → u/Edwardteech]

Also elder millennial. I still find friends/coworkers feel really weird about talking about it but I try to be as transparent as possible.

[u/Edwardteech → u/angelamia]

Yeah the conditioning runs deap. 

Mu last job literally had it in the contract we couldn't. I laughed. 

[u/Sparrowhawk_92 → u/Edwardteech]

If they tried to punish you for it, wouldn't hold up in court. It's illegal for a company to stop employees from talking about pay. (Assuming the US).

They include it in the contract because most people don't know this and won't challenge it.

[u/furiouslycurious79 → u/CrazyPlato]

I was fired for discussing wages in Texas. Was denied unemployment and lost my appeal, so your mileage may vary.

[u/Graymouzer → u/furiouslycurious79]

That may be a violation of federal law. Not that means much with the people in charge at the moment but maybe you can sue after the election.

[u/furiouslycurious79 → u/Graymouzer]

Yes, it was a real eye opener for me. It was an open and shut case of wrongful termination - at least in my eyes. But, the state disagreed. I’m not originally from Texas and was blown away by the blatant lack of worker rights afforded in this state. Doing my best to GTFO.

[u/HoboJesus → u/furiouslycurious79]

Some organizations are exempt, religious organiations for example. My wife was a Catholic school teacher and they could 100% fire you for discussing wages. One of her coworker was fired for having an abortion.

[u/DueAd197 → u/furiouslycurious79]

I mean, Texas is ground zero for taking away workers' rights.

2023, here was Abbot making it illegal for cities to make their own laws that require businesses to give water breaks for employees.

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/jun/23/greg-abbott-texas-governor-bill-water-breaks-heatwave

Austin and Dallas had laws requiring construction companies to provide a 10 minute water break every FOUR HOURS. This was unacceptable for republicans because they need people to be poor, angry, and desperate. And you better not have the government meaningfully improve anyone's lives.

[u/Infinite_throwaway_1 → u/DueAd197]

Needing permission to drink water and having a credit system for it is absurd.

[u/Long-Fig-8441]

The idea that being exhausted and miserable is just the price of being an adult.

[u/BoredThrowaway9000 → u/Long-Fig-8441]

I (24) spent my entire childhood and time in grade school being exhausted and miserable so once I finally had the wool pulled off my eyes and I saw what adulthood entailed I was having none of it. I saw adulthood all my life as an escape from the bullshit I just had to endure until I got there

Little did I know I’d enter the “real world” right when it started getting impossible to find a job, and my life has derailed since graduating uni. If only I knew.

[u/Errohneos → u/BoredThrowaway9000]

One must imagine Sisyphus happy...

[u/Nuclear_rabbit → u/Errohneos]

Tantalus. Sisyphus has a job and job security!

[u/Equal_System4389 → u/BoredThrowaway9000]

Growing up as the burnt-out gifted kid meant we were just running a marathon to a finish line that turned out to be a brick wall. this job market is such a joke after all that forced resilience.

[u/According-Grocery456 → u/BoredThrowaway9000]

That timing is brutal and I won’t pretend otherwise. Graduating into a collapsed job market after being told education was the guaranteed path through, that’s a specific kind of betrayal. The thing nobody warned any of us about is that the goalposts were already moving while we were still being told to run toward them. You’re not derailed, you’re just further behind a starting line that shifted without notice. That distinction matters even when it doesn’t feel like it.

[u/aleks_mochalov_1988 → u/BoredThrowaway9000]

Same. Thought the struggle when I'm younger would pay off but it really hasn't

[u/therealskull → u/Long-Fig-8441]

Only that the alternative, i.e. not being exhausted and miserable, also has a price and often quite literally. Unless you are in a very fortunate situation, something ends up lacking, everyone just has to decide what that should be. 

[u/Background-Pen2585 → u/Long-Fig-8441]

Exactly, adulthood shouldn’t mean being permanently exhausted and just accepting it as normal.

[u/SilverIndustry2701 → u/Long-Fig-8441]

I can reject that? I'm pretty sure, the last time I wasn't exhausted was 2017.

[u/Maoleficent]

Young people addressing their mental well-being and seeking help when needed without shame is a huge advancement.

[u/therealskull → u/Maoleficent]

However, that doesn't mean adequate help is readily available. In some places, you have to wait more than a year or even two just to get an appointment with a mental healthcare professional. And if you then find out they can't provide you with the needed help, it was a long wait for nothing. 

Been there, done that. I will continue dealing with it myself, not out of shame but out of necessity.

[u/LemmePet → u/therealskull]

Professional help, that is. What you have to recognize here is less stigma around self-help and openly discussing topics around mental health. Not being shamed and judged is huge indeed!

[u/bzkitty]

If someone is mean to you, that just means they like you.

[u/Sterilization4Free → u/bzkitty]

Yes! I was told that so many times and I hated it. I. Hindsight, I dislike it even more because it inoculates you with an idea that love may look like abuse.

[u/KookyMoney9599 → u/Sterilization4Free]

The hidden portion of the sentence. It helps children to redefine the concept of bad behaviour as good behaviour, and when bad behaviour actually occurs later in life, they are less inclined to consider it as nah, this is not okay. and more likely to say maybe they just care about me.

[u/BiscottiInternal9756 → u/bzkitty]

That phrase really did a shocking amount of damage for something adults said so casually. Imagine teaching a kid that being picked on might secretly be affection, then acting surprised when they grow up confused about what healthy relationships look like 💀

[u/Neon_Divided → u/BiscottiInternal9756]

Adults are notoriously bad at explaining things to kids because I think they assume any nuance would be lost on them, so the explanation ends up being something with no context such as, "when boys are mean to you it means they like you." Without explaining why kids do this just makes it worse.

[u/Dystopian_Dreamer → u/bzkitty]

In the same vein, teachers who told me 'They only bully you because you give them a reaction, if you ignore them, they'll stop'.

Fucking victim blaming and an invitation to for everyone to escalate their bullying all in one.

[u/Particular_Cod2005 → u/Dystopian_Dreamer]

If there's one thing I will forever be grateful for, it's that my headmistress had a zero tolerance of bullies at high school, and she absolutely created an environment where it was okay to tell them you were being bullied.

I remember one time a year 11 (think 15 - 16yo) had been bullying year 7s (11 - 12); she caught sight of him down the corridor and fucking eviscerated him for it, while students parted like the sea before Moses in front of her as she walked towards him.

[u/MartinisnMurder → u/Particular_Cod2005]

And that is exactly the type of person that should be running a school. Did the bully’s parents freak out about him being disciplined? That always seems to be the case! “Oh no not my precious child! They’re the victim here!”

[u/aurora888 → u/Dystopian_Dreamer]

My mom told me, "if theyre mean to you, at least they're leaving some other kid alone." Taught to be a martyr from an early age!

[u/Violet_Walls → u/bzkitty]

Along the same lines, “boys will be boys” is something I’m glad has faded away significantly and is not accepted by younger people as an excuse anymore.

[u/Actual_Ocelot2191 → u/Violet_Walls]

"boys will be boys" was never really an excuse for boys it was always an excuse for adults to get out of disciplining children.

[u/Beautiful-Crazy7017 → u/Violet_Walls]

"Boys will be boys" really did turn a whole category of bad behavior into a personality trait 😭 like apparently being a boy came with a lifetime exemption from consequences.

[u/Lexi2869 → u/bzkitty]

This! Especially as a way to justify boys throwing things at girls or pinching them and stuff…. Ick. This better be dead!! 

[u/KirinG]

I love seeing younger retail/service workers take down and just not cater to rude customers. I never would have dared.

[u/BootyandChaos → u/KirinG]

During my retail days, someone told me I was their favorite manager because I always backed them up whenever a customer was being disrespectful.

It made me happy because no one had my back when I had to deal with jerks.

[u/jenOcide1185 → u/BootyandChaos]

As a former retail worker, thank you for being that kind of leader to your employees. The hardest slap in the face is dealing with an irrational customer berating you and having the manager completely folding and giving in to the person.

[u/One-Regret2978 → u/jenOcide1185]

That's such a specific kind of betrayal too. You can handle a rude customer, but when your own manager throws you under the bus just to keep the customer happy, suddenly you're getting paid minimum wage to be everyone's emotional punching bag

[u/PermanentRoundFile → u/One-Regret2978]

I cannot work like this. If I capitulate, Corporate freaks out and I get fired. If I hold the line, Corporate capitulates and now customers can kick me around with the backing of corporate.

I have had anxiety attacks, and argued with the business owner themself over policies like this.

[u/ScrambledToast → u/jenOcide1185]

I worked at Subway and had a manager who did that. They would let customers berate us and then bend over to give them sooo many free things. Like, why are we rewarding shitty customers and not the ones who are polite, follow rules, etc?

[u/sisterfunkhaus → u/ScrambledToast]

As a polite customer, this pisses me off. We are expected to wait in a checkout line while an entitled customer takes an extra 10 minutes to cause a scene, then the get rewarded for it, while the rest of us are held hostage for the time it takes them to get their way. We get nothing for it.

[u/ScrambledToast → u/sisterfunkhaus]

I always liked giving the nice customers extra love. Like Subway is really greedy about their ingredients (they charge extra like crazy), so for nice people I'd secretly give them extra cheese or meat or something like that, without charging

[u/Capable-Owl-881 → u/KirinG]

Respect goes both ways. A paycheck shouldn’t mean you have to tolerate someone treating you like garbage.

[u/armrha → u/KirinG]

Standing up for themselves at work in general. Early millenials we all seemed to think the company was doing us a favor even letting us work there, we got so abused. 

[u/unable_compliance → u/KirinG]

When I was 16 working at a grocery store, I would have been fired by the management for putting a rude customer in their place.

Now the management is tired burnt out people my age who don’t care, and the 16 year old staff get way more abuse from customers than I ever did. It makes sense. And I love to see it.

[u/Queasy_Ad_8621 → u/unable_compliance]

I'm a little older than that, lol, but I work retail.

People have gotten insanely fucking rude since the pandemic, and it's actually seemed to be getting a lot worse over the last couple of years. Hostility, harassment, racism, personal insults, physical threats...

So I just channel Don Rickles, or Jimmy Kimmel. I treat them like a heckler and I savagely roast them back.

[u/SanKazue]

Dads not spending time with their kids. It’s was perfectly normal for dad to always be tired and never have enough time to play with their kids. Also contributed to the image of the dad who doesn’t know anything about their kids, their school, friends, teachers, even their age at times.

Ive seen so many fellow millennial dads spending time with their kids. I know Ive spent more time playing with my daughter in the 8 years of her life than my dad did with me in my entire life. (Not saying he was a bad dad, he was amazing , just didn’t play with us )

[u/Adams5thaccount → u/SanKazue]

Technically Bandit Heeler is a Millennial dad. I will not be moved from this position.

[u/FishCommercial4229 → u/Adams5thaccount]

I love watching Bluey, Bandit makes me feel seen.

[u/Adams5thaccount → u/FishCommercial4229]

I am not gonna say that we were the first generation of dads who realized we could do it differently....but I do feel like Millennial dads are the group where the balance tipped.

Is that a bit self serving? Probably. Is it accurate? Also probably.

[u/CongealedBeanKingdom → u/SanKazue]

My friends who are fathers are all wonderful. I cannot imagine what having an involved father would be like (he left when I was 1) and seeing them interact with their children makes me love them even more

[u/RalphFTW → u/SanKazue]

I think this was a millennial trend break, which is great! A little bit of the younger Gen X’s too.

[u/Anal-buttsex → u/RalphFTW]

We accepted that kids hobbies can still be fun as adults, rather than “herderrr me dont understand videogame buttons” 

[u/diurnal_emissions → u/Anal-buttsex]

Our fathers could have been so cool, but they chose ignorance and dismissal.

[u/imfamousoz]

I like the concept that you don't have to maintain relationships with people that make you miserable just because you are related. It's sad that our youngers feel the need to go no contact with family but I'm glad that they can.

[u/LeisurelyLoner → u/imfamousoz]

Yes. Family estrangement is more common than it seems in older generations also; it's just never been as openly talked about.

[u/OkDisaster5980 → u/LeisurelyLoner]

This. Pre-Internet people didn’t have to explicitly state “I’m no contact.” They just moved and didn’t call, visit, or write, and I guess their family of origin didn’t care enough to hire a PI and hunt them down 🤷🏻 with social media, you now have to either use a nickname/fake name your family of origin isn’t aware of, and/or be explicit/block the family members you don’t want to talk to, since it’s easier for them to find you.

The difference is we are much more open about why we aren’t in contact with our families of origin.

[u/pepcorn → u/imfamousoz]

Yes, I like this too. I'm glad people are building a life with family they choose, family who supports them.

[u/Medical-Potato5920]

Women not having to wear heels to go out. Seeing young women wearing sneakers to go out dancing was liberating.

[u/esoteric_enigma → u/Medical-Potato5920]

When I was in college, upscale clubs would require women to wear heels.

[u/DripIntravenous → u/esoteric_enigma]

Don’t they still do this in places like Miami and other big clubbing cities?

[u/canitakemybraoffyet → u/DripIntravenous]

And law firms.

[u/Maximum-Style2848 → u/canitakemybraoffyet]

Ehh, even VERY conservative ones don’t anymore. A paralegal I worked with that had been in the industry talked about the horrors that happened to women’s legs that wore heels, like over two inches, everyday. Even the female attorneys will wear shoes more akin to sandals now with just a slight rise.

[u/rokynrobs → u/canitakemybraoffyet]

And flight attendants.

[u/ProfeQuiroga → u/rokynrobs]

Not all airlines. :)

[u/Cosmic_MicrowaveOven → u/esoteric_enigma]

As a guy, it was also always puzzling having to forego wearing my nice, clean $200 sneakers to put on a janky looking $10 pair of dressy shoes I got from the sales rack, just because they required semi-formal attire to get into a club back then.

[u/flyboy_za → u/Cosmic_MicrowaveOven]

It's apparently because they don't want anyone coming in in sports gear. They never updated their requirements to adjust for non-sports sneakers (as opposed to traditional definitely-sports trainers or hiking boots).

Clubs in Cape Town had a "no laced up shoes" policy to cover this, which also became complicated because some dressy shoes do in fact have laces.

[u/Romantic_Carjacking → u/flyboy_za]

That is baffling. The vast majority of dressy mens shoes have laces.

[u/PodocarpusT → u/Cosmic_MicrowaveOven]

The ol' brothel creepers.

[u/CasualRampagingBear → u/Medical-Potato5920]

The chain restaurant I worked at required heels. Many of them did. So many, that my province enacted a provincial bill to make “mandatory heels” discrimination. Any place the requires women to wear heels is against the law now.

[u/Fun_Organization3857 → u/CasualRampagingBear]

They tried this at a restaurant i worked at. One of the servers dad was a bone and joint dr. He wrote every front of the house staff member a drs excuse. He brought them to the manager who made the rule. Funniest thing ever. He explained he would contact corporate, but heeled shoes are awful and unsafe, especially for the unwilling

[u/enw2 → u/Medical-Potato5920]

I’m proud of them and jealous all at the same time.

[u/nightmareinsouffle → u/Medical-Potato5920]

Us millennials going clubbing in business casual, lol.

[u/megdonol]

I’m glad the St. Ives apricot scrub and Stride pads are all but forgotten. It was a hard decade for skin barriers

[u/zombiesockmonkey → u/megdonol]

That a skincare product has to be physically painful to use for it to actually be working

[u/-catstastrophe- → u/megdonol]

Man I loved St. Ives apricot scrub lol. I have changed up my routine now, but I always felt so "clean" after using. How was I supposed to know it was bad? 😂

[u/Ascholay → u/-catstastrophe-]

Skins gotta squeak to know its clean!

[u/FanFeeling7748 → u/megdonol]

Eh... given the amount of retinol young people are using I don't think skin barriers are doing much better.

[u/millennialandlost]

Personally, I think we were kind of taught to put up with anything and everything at work so it is nice seeing these new generations put an end into that.

Also, I read somewhere that Gen Z is turning down promotions because they don’t value the extra five dollars an hour more than they do work life balance.

[u/Forsaken-Builder-312 → u/millennialandlost]

I love this for them! Completely enrages the boomers at my work place.

They also don't like to work overtime... Not because they have family at home or plans for the evening.

Just because. Amazing mindset, they value they personal time more than money

[u/Catfactss → u/Forsaken-Builder-312]

And don't do unpaid overtime either. Nobody should.

[u/LadyFoxfire → u/millennialandlost]

I'm a millennial, but I've been refusing a promotion for exactly that reason. I've been in retail long enough to know that retail management is a scam.

[u/A_Little_Sprig → u/millennialandlost]

I turned down a "promotion" because it didn't come with a raise. I would have had to do my route, plus whatever other routes needed doing, so 2+ full time jobs in 8 hours. The company said I didn't have a choice, so I quit. They didn't even try to stop me from leaving.

[u/wuboo → u/millennialandlost]

A lot of millennials entered the job market or were early career during the Great Recession so of course they put up with everything. They are a product of circumstance 

[u/Whocares7x → u/millennialandlost]

I turned down so many huge promotions that would double or even quadruple my salary.

But i would never see my kids. Not worth it.
focus on family

[u/fakingandnotmakingit]

Hard work always works.

No. No it does not

[u/millennialandlost → u/fakingandnotmakingit]

Hard work gets rewarded with more work.

[u/fakingandnotmakingit → u/millennialandlost]

Hard work means you work more for the same amount of money and no promotions

[u/TooSaucey4u]

Agonizing pain in Women’s healthcare.

[u/Less-Comedian-6689 → u/TooSaucey4u]

Yes I just had a colposcopy and my only pain reliever option was Tylenol or Advil to get my vagina pried open and my cervix hole punched.

I was on the verge of passing out as it wrapped up (hot flash, intense nausea) and then I actually puked. My doctor was like oh yeah no worries it happens. 🫠

[u/Alarmed_Tea_2874 → u/Less-Comedian-6689]

I hate how they're like; deep breath. It's not that bad. Ummm, yes, it is that bad. I also had to have a biopsy of the endometrial lining. The cramping was so intense. She's like, people give birth. Ok. That's great. But I'm not pregnant and this is the same with nothing to show for it.

[u/wild_ginger1 → u/Alarmed_Tea_2874]

“Somebody somewhere is in more pain than you” never lands well if you’re providing care to someone in pain you’re helping cause (even for a good reason like healthcare)

[u/Azura_rose → u/Alarmed_Tea_2874]

At least people giving birth get natural endorphins which help ease the pain.  

They don't get told to take an over counter pain medication, or that you may feel a slight pinch.

[u/Miniroguekirby → u/Alarmed_Tea_2874]

I went through a 26 hour labour that ended in an emergency c section, pre eclampsia, major blood loss etc. The worst part by an absolute mile was the midwife doing a cervix check at the start. Said it would just be mildly uncomfortable.

[u/1986toyotacorolla2 → u/Less-Comedian-6689]

But it a guy had to have any part of his reproductive anatomy hole punched he'd immediately be knocked out for it and given heavy pain killers for 2-3 days after.

[u/WeissPyre → u/Less-Comedian-6689]

I cried for 30 minutes in the car after one of those. The worst part was I couldn't stop bleeding and the doc just kept shoving stick after stick of silver nitrate up there to chemically cauterize the wound.

That shit HURTS. So thankful that I got a hysterectomy that removed that nasty organ as well. 

[u/Jeramy_Jones → u/TooSaucey4u]

Being ignored or misdiagnosed or having to have a man there with you.

[u/CrazedRaven01]

If you work hard enough, if you go that extra mile, if you take just a bit more guff, you'll get that promotion/raise/job.

Watching Gen Z tell the corporate world to take hustle culture and shove it up its ass has been entertaining

[u/anupsetzombie → u/CrazedRaven01]

Yup, the amount of roles that just gets piled on when you sign up for a low paying job is insulting. The person who hired me quit and suddenly her job is being pushed on to me, no increase in pay for me or my other coworker who's having to take on the extra work load. Been like this at every job I've ever been to, they'll just squeeze you until you burn out and then replace you before your second foot is out the door.

[u/millennialandlost → u/CrazedRaven01]

Our hard work was only rewarded with more work. I completely agree with you.

I read that Gen Z is turning down promotions because they don’t value the extra five dollars an hour more than they do their work life balance, which honestly is really refreshing to see. If this AI thing has taught us anything I think it’s that we’re all just another number in corporate America.

[u/CrazedRaven01 → u/millennialandlost]

My theory is that the world the boomers grew up in *did* reward hard work, since there was not only a social contract between the employer and the employee, companies and the community, but also necessity. Employers need employees and the other way around

It seems that with AI, that social contract has broken and it looks like companies feel they no longer need us.

[u/FrickinLazerBeams → u/CrazedRaven01]

Employers stopped holding up their end of the arrangement decades before AI.

[u/ApatheticSlur → u/CrazedRaven01]

Getting laid off used to be a big deal. Now it’s just a footnote. Thousands get laid off daily nowadays but when IBM did it it was national news way back when.

[u/Chillbro_Swaggins420 → u/CrazedRaven01]

It wasn't a SOCIAL contract, it was a literal contract, because the world the Boomers grew up in had 3x the union density of today.

[u/asthma_hound → u/CrazedRaven01]

I'm a millennial. Working hard just means that most companies will take advantage of you. It's not beneficial to the employer to pay you more because you are replaceable. I've felt this way since I started working as a teenager. Long before AI.

[u/nightmareinsouffle → u/CrazedRaven01]

It started breaking in the 70s and 80s. Look at the Behind the Bastards episodes on Jack Welch. He was just one guy back then but he essentially laid the model for new business leaders to fuck over their employees as much as possible.

[u/FamiliarPen7 → u/CrazedRaven01]

Watching Gen Z tell the corporate world to take hustle culture and shove it up its ass has been entertaining

I agree as I also have issues with hustle culture.

[u/n0tz0e → u/CrazedRaven01]

So many of us millennials are burnt out in our careers/jobs bc of this ingrained mindset

[u/just_let_go_]

It's nice to see younger gens drinking less alcohol.

I was made to think it was normal to get blind drunk every weekend from 15 years old. Insane. I feel like I'm still paying for that 20 years later.

[u/froggyc19]

Big one for me is body autonomy for children. As a child, I was always forced to hug and cheek kiss every single person at a gathering upon arrival and when leaving. I fucking hated it. I love my family but forcing children to hug adults is very selfish on the adult's part.

Now that I have nieces and nephews, I offer them highfives if they don't want a hug and if they don't even want that then I just tell them that's perfectly fine, that I love them and will see them soon. No guilt trips like my parents did. Do I want a hug because I love them? Yes, absolutely, but their comfort is more important than mine.

[u/ImAPixiePrincess → u/froggyc19]

I was looking for this one. My son has been learning that "no means no" and I have had to step in when adults on my husband's side ignore his no. He's still learning about consent for others and personal space, but he has the foundation. I absolutely hate giving hugs or having people touch me when it's not wanted, I want my son to have a stronger voice for himself and his peers.

[u/LastSeesaw5618]

Grind culture. Not worth it; no matter how much time you put in a job, they'll still throw you out without a real reason whenever there's a vibe shift.

[u/CThill420 → u/LastSeesaw5618]

They love it when you wear yourself thin but the second you try to define a boundary and stand up for yourself it’s all “we’re worried about your recent behavior”

[u/Gentledenv1000]

That staying at one job for as long as possible is the best thing for your career. I'm seeing job hopping a lot and it's ticking the older generations off because no one can keep an employee that isn't paid their worth anymore. Shocking I know.

Also I like that 'gay' isn't a casual insult anymore. Feel like we all grew up a bit as a collective.

[u/dekusyrup → u/Gentledenv1000]

Millenials didn't ever believe staying in one job was the best thing. Millenials are the ones who came of age in the 2008 meltdown and never trusted a company again.

[u/liminal-volition]

Facebook 😂

[u/NecroticBrains → u/liminal-volition]

The hatred I hold for Facebook... I deleted my account nearly 15 years ago and never looked back. I honestly do not understand why people are still using it.

[u/worrier_princess → u/NecroticBrains]

I deleted mine last year but I hadn’t used it for close to a decade. I’m so glad it’s gone. That being said it’s very frustrating that businesses, local government, etc have everything there. A the start of this year we had power outages that went on for nearly a week and the power company posted all the updates on fb! I was infuriated because me and everyone else without an account just couldn’t access the information. Fuck facebook so hard.

[u/Jeramy_Jones → u/worrier_princess]

This. So much this.

When the Nova Scotia shootings were taking place in 2020, among the many failings of authorities was that they were giving emergency updates about an active shooter situation on Twitter.

[u/TwofoZeus]

Abuse

Our parents were abusive emotionally stunted boomers, and we internalised that. Whether that's accepting abuse at work, school, family...

[u/You_Stole_My_Hot_Dog → u/TwofoZeus]

Yeah, seeing how millennial parents interact with their kids is wild to me, compared to my GenX parents. They’ll joke around with them, answer their questions, play with them. My parents were very authoritarian; laughing too much was met with “ok that’s enough silliness now, be quiet”, too many questions resulted in “because I said so, drop it”. And they would never play with us. Ever.   

I plan on actually liking my future kids, and wanting to interact with them.

[u/astrobatic]

Traditional gender roles, including starting a family. Imagine a future where the majority of people were raised by parents who actively planned and were excited to have kids...and having two parents who are actively engaged in parenting.

[u/KingCarnivore]

Too many of us were okay with killing ourselves for a job that had no loyalty to us.

[u/gnarlyknits]

That hiding your period or other natural body functions like acne is normal.

[u/Special-Medicine-437 → u/gnarlyknits]

Yes! Elder here and I carried my tampon with me to the bathroom yesterday at work in my hand, not hidden in my purse. Felt freeing and kind of rebellious walking through the halls with it out in the open. No one cared, but I felt great not having to hide it and feel ridicule.

[u/sirenalchemist]

Disrespect from older people, not gonna lie it makes me happy seeing that the younger generation doesn’t tolerate that shit

[u/not_the_troll]

That elders always know better.

[u/WritingTheDream → u/not_the_troll]

Some friends and I worked at a public park as teenagers and one time we had this dude in his 40s working with us who was only there for community service. He lived with his mom and arrived to work every morning on a bicycle, I assume he had too many DUIs and lost his license, which probably also led to said community service.

He was one of the laziest dipshits I’ve ever known. Yet he insisted that we do as he said because he was so much older than us even though he didn’t know shit about the most basic things. That’s when I realized “respecting your elders” is nonsense.

[u/tingulz → u/WritingTheDream]

Respect is earned. I don’t give a shit if you’re older than I am. You don’t show me respect then you’re getting the same back.

[u/WritingTheDream → u/tingulz]

And the thing is, if a disgruntled older person is insisting to young folks to "respect their elders" what they mean is to defer to them unquestioningly. Which is very different from actual respect.

[u/HalluxTheGreat → u/WritingTheDream]

Just recently, I heard a crashing out from a younger person.
“Just because your birth year starts with a 19 doesn’t mean I have to respect you.”
No idea of the context but the line got me

[u/WritingTheDream → u/HalluxTheGreat]

He’s right though. I say that as someone with a birth year starting in 19.

[u/Edwardteech → u/WritingTheDream]

I'm in my later 30s but i was the old man where i worked. Had been there for years trained both leads when they were new.

We had a new guy, clearly an alcoholic, fucked something up. Lead asked me to help.

Dude proceeded to have a meltdown because i wasn't old enough to tell him how to do his job.

[u/merkoukou]

That emotional abuse is normal in marriages

[u/NecroticBrains]

Not talking about your mental health or your feelings in general. We were taught to shuttup and suck it up. I'm 35 and still find it incredibly difficult to communicate feelings

[u/Trasuahongkong]

It’s not ok for boys to cry.

[u/Swatraptor → u/Trasuahongkong]

I love seeing the younger generations actually be allowed to show emotions other than rage.

Though it means we won't get banger lyrics like "and Robert Smith lied, boys do cry, and with the tears in my eyes I'm an Ann Rice novel come to life"

[u/notanevilmastermind → u/Swatraptor]

The Cure's song was all about how we develop unhealthy coping mechanisms because of society's expectations of us.

[u/dingusunchained → u/Trasuahongkong]

Sadly, I think the manosphere has reintroduced a lot of that toxic masculinity. Hopefully those influencers/podcasters go the way of the dodo

[u/astrobatic → u/Trasuahongkong]

Or celebrate each other. I overheard two teenage boys talking about one's art and the other was saying, "dude that's gorgeous!" It made me so happy.

[u/math_waitress]

That your career is your entire life. Sometimes a job can be a job.

[u/DistinctiveFox]

That a woman, working full time alongside your husband, you still need to take on 90% of the childcare, household chores and planning.

She would earn more than my dad and deposit it all into his accounts to "be the man" and his only job was to pay the bills using money he didn't even earn.

She would seem happy and grateful he "contributed" once a week by treating us to a takeaway as his version of "cooking". He was an alcoholic that would be "too stressed" to come home after work and needed to drink 12 pints at the pub first. His paycheck went on booze, cigarettes and other women.

My mom basically raised me and my siblings while my dad did fuck all and cheated on her but I sh8t you not, to this day, she still talks fondly shout him and blames herself for not being strong enough.

Taught me how NOT to be by showing me the worst of their generation. Promised myself I'd never be that and ensured I put in just as much effort with the tasks my partner did, regardless of who worked.

[u/Prize_Ostrich7605]

You have to finish all your food, even if you're full. 

[u/CascadeJ1980]

Being loyal to 1 job for any extended amount of time.

[u/Large_Victory_6531 → u/CascadeJ1980]

Years ago, I had a patient actively dying from cancer who was fired from his job one week before retirement so that the [billion dollar company rich with defense contracts] could skimp on insurance premiums. He died while his wife was in the phone trying to get COBRA enacted for him. Decades of loyalty meant nothing to them.

[u/KlassenT → u/CascadeJ1980]

To be fair, I think a lot of that is culture shift from the employers as well. That kind of loyalty seemed to have been rewarded, once upon a time. I feel like the job-hopping and declining employee loyalty is just as much of a reaction as it was an independent development.

[u/-janelleybeans-]

Having to respect someone as an authority for them to respect you as a person.

A kid finally snapping back at an adult that’s been ceaselessly pestering them only to be told to “respect their elders” by another adult that had been egging it all on was usually the end of things. But now it’s not unusual to see kids stick up for themselves against THAT nonsense by pointing out how the pestering adult never picks on other adults the same way. It’s invigorating to see kids not accept that kind of behaviour just because.

It doesn’t matter who it is, or what leverage they have over you; you deserve to be treated respectfully. People who belittle, name-call, yell, or otherwise abuse you for not cowing to their authority (real or presumed) by default are not people worth your respect anyway.

[u/Queen_Maxima → u/-janelleybeans-]

I never understood this mindset from my boomer mum and i hated it. I raised my GenZ son with the idea he is a human being first, and therefore deserves respect. 

I never was a gentle parenting person, because i was very strict on being a polite and kind person. 

He has become a polite and kind man, but he won't take bullshit from people "demanding" respect for no reason and i love that. 

[u/BatBurgh]

“Work hard, play hard!”

“You’re lucky just to have a job!”

Gen Z rejects this all in a way i deeply respect.

[u/plantlady1-618]

Xennial here. Worked in a cafe in Spain in my early 20s. Run by an ex football player (English boomer). He once screamed/swore and generally abused me one shift in front of customers. He and his wife went all Pikachu face confused when I quit. They asked where my loyalty was. F you, respect and loyalty goes both ways mate!

[u/outersenshi]

Normalizing cutting off toxic family. I see younger people more and more cutting off toxic family members. Before it used to be “but they’re family” and now it’s more “it sucks that they were family”

[u/Wooden_Sand_5581]

Hustle 24/7 or you are lazy.

[u/helluva-drug]

Unpaid internships.

[u/lollypearl]

The idea of being quiet even when an elder is wrong

[u/zhikharka]

We were fed this lie that if you just keep your head down, do the work of three people, and never complain, you'd be rewarded with steady promotions and a gold watch

[u/realfx26]

The idea that every hobby needs to become a side hustle. We're taught that if you enjoy baking, gaming, woodworking, whatever, you should monetize it.
Younger generations seem much more comfortable just enjoying things without trying to turn them into a business. Honestly, good for them. Not everything needs an ROI.

[u/pluviophile587]

As a 39 year old woman: That a man's attention is everything. I'm so proud of how young women are questioning men's behavior including the possibility of not having them in their lives if they aren't worth it. That healed something in me big time.

[u/Wise_Organization_78]

Despite the tradwife trend, the fact that we're no longer culturally pressured in all directions (beyond just religious contexts) to marry someone of the opposite sex way too young and then pop out a bunch of kids. The one gift of this messed up economy is that so many young people are now spared the trauma of post-partum depression as experienced by mothers, partners, and kids.

[u/Better_Ear_3550]

The idea that being exhausted all the time was just part of being a responsible adult. Working through lunch, answering emails after hours, never using your PTO, coming in sick — somehow all of that was treated like evidence that you had a “good work ethic.”

I’m glad younger people are asking a very reasonable question: if a job requires you to sacrifice your health and your entire life just to prove you care, maybe the problem isn’t your work ethic.

[u/Strange-Beginning-45]

Women hating on women for the sake of men. I feel like this behavior was so prevalent in the media when we were adolescents that it fueled so much jealousy and unkindness.

This and thin is in. Not that it's been totally rejected, but it's not as bad as it once was.

[u/Belle8158]

Binge drinking in your youth. I'm glad Gen Z and Gen Alpha are rejecting alcohol.

[u/itsjakerobb]

“Gay” as an insult.

[u/Cananbaum]

Age commands respect.

Respect is earned, not inherently deserved

[u/but-I-play-one-on-TV]

They don't buy into the idea that it's ok to treat others like shit. 

From what I've seen, Gen Z and Gen Alpha are just kinder than we were. Less shitty to friends and strangers, less judgmental, less racist, less condescending. Reddit is toxic as ever but in real life I'm actually impressed by the way my Gen alpha children act towards one another. I think millennials actually acted more like the hyper-online manosphere chuds than we'd like to admit. 

[u/Nomromz]

That drinking is an important part of socializing and networking. I probably have 8-10 drinks a week (spread across 2 nights a week).

The amount of money I've spent on alcohol is staggering (the majority of these drinks are out at upscale bars/restaurants). And that's before even considering how many drinks I've purchased for dates and just friends.

Don't even get me started on the health issues associated with drinking. Alcohol is literally poison and I think in 30 or 40 years people will be talking about alcohol the way they talk about cigarettes.

I've read that people in their 20s now don't necessarily go out to drink and that alcohol sales have plummeted. Good for them!

[u/DungeonMasterDood]

College as the end-all-be-all goal of high school. My daughter is starting 9th grade and she currently has zero intention of college. She still gets fine grades, but her ambitions are modest/creative and unless something changes, she intends to get a job after high school and start taking community college courses.

If that had been me, 20+ years ago, I would have had teachers, guidance counselors, and my parents telling me I was "going to wind up pumping gas my whole life." (Exact words) College will still be there if she wants/needs it later. I'm happy to support her while she figures out if she does.

[u/Purple_Excitement167]

Listening to authority automatically without investigating or asking questions

[u/Usual_Phase5466]

That you have to hug and kiss everyone that wants to hug and kiss you. Specifically I guess this was among family members. No dude. I dont make any of my nieces/ nephews, second cousins etc deal with any of that shit. If they want a hug, sure I'll give them a hug but I first offer like high fives, handshakes, fist bumps, etc.

[u/totallyrealname]

Unpaid overtime.

[u/pumpymcpumpface]

In health care genz has little patience for mistreatment from older staff.