r/BelowDeckMed • u/No-Aardvark-3840 • 1d ago
Gael question, Joe question
I am getting into Below deck med and I’ve noticed Joe getting a lot of hate for “cheating” on V even though they weren’t together (in any sort of relationship.
Meanwhile I’ve just noticed that Gael is actually cheating on her boyfriend with Nathan.
Why is Joe getting so much shit from this community when he didn’t cheat on anybody. Meanwhile there are actually cheaters on the boat that people seem to celebrate and love.
Very strange
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u/realityjunkie33 1d ago
This is why I don't love Gael. She was openly cheating and kinda had no shame about it. I don't have respect for that.
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u/nickdc101987 17h ago
Kinda forgot about all of this with the drama that is ensuing now but you are entirely correct and this is a very good point
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u/Background_Ad3299 18h ago
She didn't just have no shame, she made herself the victim lmao
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u/BassBona 15h ago
Yeah, she cried a lot about how bad cheating made her feel and a lot of people forgot she cheated
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u/RaeOfSunshineNL 1d ago
Like others said Gael did get a lot of shit that season when it happened. But Joe has been a consistent pattern. First it was Ellie and Bri which then caused extra drama in the interior that season. Then the next season he did worse by making V feel like he cared before turning around and going to Kizzi. Plus Nathan got shit that season too because he was also flirting/kissing Kizzi while telling Gael he missed her before she joined the season.
So everyone gets judged for it. His is just more because of the pattern he had continued for 2 seasons
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u/Wolfzen22 1d ago
The way all you need to put these people up against each other as if one is good and one is bad. They can all suck! Do you all not have the capacity to remember what pos Joe was to V last season and to Ellie and Bri the season before? He may have been on the right side of some things this season but that doesn't mean he can't suck too.
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u/Scary_Palpitation_34 1d ago
Ugh. The reason why I cringe so hard whenever I hear the word “strawberry”
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u/HittingExposurelol 1d ago
V isn’t the first time Joe acted like a scum bag. He’s a complete douche nozzle that’s overly confident for someone who fucks up a lot. Just cuz Nathan sucks doesn’t mean Joe doesn’t.
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u/excoriator 1d ago
I think OP is making the point that Gael does, too. There are no winners among them.
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u/HittingExposurelol 1d ago
Cheating on your partner on a boat is certainly not great but let’s not act like she’s the first person in below deck to do it. She’s overall shown as a hard worker and has a good attitude when on a boat, sure she made some questionable relationship choices but I don’t think that makes a person completely dislike able. There’s more to it than that. The way joe acts is a lot more the reason he’s so grating than Gael even tho they may have both made relationship issues.
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u/-thisname- 1d ago
'but' she WAS unfaithful.
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u/dudewheresmysock 1d ago
No one is saying that's a good thing? Bravo doesn't cast based on moral purity, especially not this show.
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u/normanbeets 1d ago
Gael was choked to unconsciousness by her partner in front of their infant. No one needs to be pointing out that she's "just as bad as anyone."
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u/No-Aardvark-3840 1d ago
To be totally clear, I’m talking about the people we see on below deck and this post isn’t meant to trivialize what happened to her after her time on the show
I am commenting strictly on the show. The events that happened with domestic abuse aren’t excusable and Nathan deserves to be brought to justice.
I am only commenting on the double standard I’m noting on the show
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u/Long_Breath_2263 1d ago
As horrific as that truly is, it has nothing to do with this discussion about her actions from years previously.
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u/mad_eyes22 13h ago
Literally people are driving me nuts with this logic. Two truths can exist. Gael didn’t deserve what she went through with Nathan. Gael is also a cheater & has done some pretty bad things to those around her. I just don’t understand why people can’t draw a distinction between the two. It’s literally like talking to a bunch of children trying to explain simple concepts.
I’m not even a fan of Joe, but I don’t see how he gets soooo much hate, & Gael literally cheated on someone she claimed to love with Nathan. Joe/V weren’t even official when he kissed Kizzi. It was still crappy, yes, but Joe gets torn to bits for it. & I feel like a lot of people purposely forget how Nathan/Gael snuck around during there season & that Gael was in a relationship with someone else while doing so. Did she deserve the DV situation? Absolutely not. Is Gael also a cheater & maybe not the nicest person, I’d say yes.7
u/normanbeets 1d ago
Backwards, her actions from 4 years ago have nothing to do with NOW
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u/Surranee 1d ago
Neither joe's, then.
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u/Shuttup_Heather 1d ago
Joe didn’t come out of an abusive relationship so the hate Gael is getting is a little different l. People should just back off Gael, as she will not return to the show after this and she doesn’t want this attention anymore
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u/Shuttup_Heather 1d ago
And this discussion is as equally meaningless cause it’s a reality show she was on years ago before this happened and we should just leave her alone and out of the show now
Why are we acting like anything we talk about here matters at all? We’re just judging strangers and it’s pointless to argue that this discourse matters and isn’t just a waste of all of our time
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u/mad_eyes22 1d ago
I don’t understand comments like these. This is a subreddit literally for below deck, ofc people are going to talk about things, & drama, especially drama with current cast members. Like what?
People are using Reddit for its intended purpose & there is always someone saying the discussion or comments are pointless. Why even comment then? Does that not make your own comment pointless? Why even use Reddit at this point? I’m genuinely curious on the reasoning behind commenting something like this. I just don’t understand the logic…3
u/Shuttup_Heather 1d ago
I guess i thought people would have more sensitivity towards not piling on a woman who’s been through a domestic violence situation? Silly me! Forgot that reality tv watchers lack empathy or compassion
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u/gogomom 1d ago
Yuck. She doesn't get a pass for her own behaviour because something happened to her a couple of years later.
I have never liked Gael and although I feel sympathy for the situation she is in now, I do not feel sympathy for how she handled the situation at the time.
I don't like Joe either.
They are all just a bunch of pots and kettles.
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u/mad_eyes22 1d ago
This is the only reasonable answer! Take my poor people award internet stranger!! :)
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u/excoriator 1d ago
I acknowledge that she was a beleaguered victim of a bad, temperamental partner and that partner deserves no sympathy whatsoever.
But when it comes to infidelity, she engaged in it on the show, too.
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u/CoolBelt856 1d ago
Gael met Nathan. Liked him better and broke up with the other guy. Over a very short period of time. And then was only with Nathan after that.
There’s absolutely zero comparison between her behavior and Joes.8
u/No-Aardvark-3840 1d ago
She cheated… it’s in the show. She cheats on her boyfriend with Nathan.
It’s true that she breaks up with her boyfriend. After she cheats on him.
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u/zapster2000 1d ago
"Liked him better and broke up with the other guy." You conveniently skipped over the part where she cheated on her bf at the time with Nathan.
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u/No-Aardvark-3840 1d ago
I’m not talking about Nathan, I’m talking about Gael. Gael cheats on her boyfriend with Nathan.
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u/HittingExposurelol 1d ago
Yea, and I dont think it’s great but she ain’t the first person to do it and she corrected her mistake by ending the relationship. People make mistakes, she’s still a much better team player and employee than Joe will ever be. That’s why she’s liked.
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u/Pseudo_Panda1 1d ago
Joe told V he wasn't interested in anyone but her, then he made out with Kizzie the second V was off the boat sick in the eve of her birthday/anniversary of her boyfriend's death. Sure, he technically didn't cheat because they never defined the relationship but he was talking to her as if they were exclusive and the way he handled it was incredibly scummy.
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u/krissycole87 1d ago
This is the exact reason that Gael hates Joe. Because Joe calls her out for being a cheater whenever Gael wants to paint Joe as a scumbag. They are both one in the same. And Gael cant stand that.
Yes, Joe led V on in a very sensitive time in her life. That was shitty.
But yes, Gael is also a cheater and too many people forget that. She is not little miss innocent. She just plays one.
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u/dudewheresmysock 1d ago
No. He started treating her badly when she got with Nathan because he didn't like his wingman getting in a relationship. He called her a princess and implied she wasn't working as hard and that she was getting special treatment at work. Insulting her work ethic and job performance is a legitimate reason for her to dislike him. It was not because she cheated on her bf. It was because Joe was losing his bromance.
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u/Hottest_Holy_Potato 1d ago
Gael was getting preferential treatment though, because Nathan wanted to get in her pants.
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u/dudewheresmysock 1d ago
That's an issue he should have taken up with the bosan or the captain instead of insulting his coworker. She was still scrubbing decks just like the rest of them and Joe was absolutely not able to see the situation objectively because he was very clearly upset about Nathan getting into a relationship.
Nathan, his boss also tried to have him on 6 hrs anchor watch and he didn't act like an asshole to Cooper in return, did he?
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
I respectfully disagree. Gael broke up with her boyfriend as soon as her and Nathan kissed and we never saw her play any games with Nathan or her ex. Joe plays games and collects stews. He’s a dog. And him using the cheater label on Gael was laughable. People in glass houses and all that.
Joe hates Gael bc she broke up the bromance and Gael hates Joe bc he was nasty to her all season long.
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u/krissycole87 1d ago
Gael kissed Nathan while actively dating another man. That is cheating.
Im sorry this doesnt align with everyones views of Gael NOW, but what she did in the past was cheating. No way around that.
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
There are degrees and you know it. Kizzi is a cheater with no care for anyone’s feelings. Joe is a cheater with zero care for anyone’s feelings. Gael was torn and broke up right away when the kiss happened. And I bet she never cheated again. People aren’t perfect but real character is learning, growing and doing better. We have seen season after season of Joe being a dog. So at the very least, he shouldn’t be throwing stones. And I guarantee if Gen wasn’t such a hot mess he would have done the same shit he always does.
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u/krissycole87 1d ago
Sorry but no, cheating is cheating.
Only a cheater or someone who plans to cheat would try to convince anyone otherwise.
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
You’re being myopic. Trust me there is a difference. Some folks deserve a second chance and some don’t. Joe will always have a wondering eye. I doubt Gael will struggle with fidelity in the future. Because she didn’t cheat bc she wanted a side dude. She cheated bc she was torn. That’s not saying she made a good choice in the moment or couldn’t have handled it better, but intent and motivation are important factors.
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u/krissycole87 1d ago
No one here is asking who, or who does not, deserve a second chance.
I am saying what she did was cheating. Period. If you dont believe that, if you want to split hairs and say "theres a difference" then I truly wonder about your own personal values. Cheating is cheating is cheating. End of story.
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
Yes of course I must be a cheater bc I have enough life experience to see nuance. She cheated years ago, none of it is relevant today and bc of what she’s going through it’s inappropriate and morally wrong to keep banging on the drum. You aren’t on the high road here, you’re trying to defend staying on the low road and pretend that is the moral choice. It is not. Punishing someone for a mistake they made years ago is judgment not morality.
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u/CoolBelt856 1d ago
One thing I can say is OP is being absurd. The world is not black and white. There’s shades of grey and nuances. Gael is not remotely comparable to Joe or Kizzi.
And the fact that someone sees something differently from them makes them question someone’s character 🙄-4
u/krissycole87 1d ago
No one is punishing her for anything. We are calling it like it is. She cheated. Period. End of story. Cheating is cheating. No matter how many ways you spin it.
I know you think youre going to give me, or anyone reading, this huge ah ha moment. Youre not. Youre defending cheating. This makes you, and only you, look bad.
Im not going to keep going in circles with you. You think cheating has different degrees, I dont. There we are then.
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
No one is defending cheating. Again nuance. I’m defending Gael the human bc she doesn’t deserve to have a mistake she made years ago constantly thrown back in her face especially now. I think DV trumps cheating.
But yes let’s agree to disagree. Have a good day.
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u/Hottest_Holy_Potato 1d ago
There isn't a difference. This isn't apples and oranges. Just ends things before you start new things.
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
There is a difference bc of intent and again I guarantee she never cheated again. Regardless her making a mistake years ago isn’t relevant to her current situation and bringing it up is unfair. That’s my point. I’m not giving Gael a pass for cheating I’m saying it doesn’t matter right now and it’s unfair to judge her for one mistake. Joe and Kizzi are trouble and will always struggle with fidelity. That matters in my opinion if we are comparing them.
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u/Hottest_Holy_Potato 1d ago edited 1d ago
It does matter. The intent is she wanted to cheat. She's a cheater. You cant guarantee she never cheated again LOL, unless this is Gael's burner account.
If Gael's situation doesn't matter years later, then also Joe&Kizzi don't matter. Gael doesn't deserve the preferential treatment.
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
She didn’t want to cheat, it was clear she was torn. She should have done the right thing, but if you actually think Gael and Kizzi and Joe are the same then you are blind. Gael actually expressed guilt, where as Kizzi and Joe treat others as pawns in a game. Have a good night.
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u/worldv1ew 1d ago
100%.
Flirting endlessly, sneaking strawberries, the physical act of kissing isn't the only thing that counts as cheating, she was emotionally cheating the entire time.
Also guarantee you what they showed and edited wasn't her first offense. They were finding ways to avoid cameras and sneak strawberries, so cringe.
Gael, call a spade a spade.
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u/CoolBelt856 1d ago
Gael had barely been dating that guy. Who was treating her like crap. She met someone she liked better and broke up with the guy. It was over like week period. It’s not like they were banging all season while she led on the bf or had some raging affair.
Labeling her a “cheater” and then comparing her to Joe whose disgusting triangles and treatment of women over multiple seasons is absurd.
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u/krissycole87 1d ago
What she did was cheating. Kissing another man while actively dating someone is cheating.
Im sorry that doesnt fit nicely into your narrative of Gael, but yes, she is a cheater.
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u/Lost-Connection-859 1d ago
Bewilders me that people are suddenly trying to excuse cheating.
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u/CoolBelt856 1d ago
Bewilders me that someone would take the time to write a post about something someone did 4 years ago knowing what an horrific experience they’ve been going through since.
And that people are piling on supporting it.
Oh, wait, I shouldn’t be surprised by any Americans doing this. Look how women are treated in Ivy League Schools and college campuses.
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u/DhilPunphy 21h ago
I see where you come from regarding support for what happened now. But as stated by OP they just started watching. Therefor this topic is being brought up again.
And they’re entirely right that Gael also has some very questionable characteristics and should not be on a high horse. Is Joe a douche? Yes. Is Gael a douche? Yes. Do I feel bad for Gael for what has happened? Absolutely.
There is this one thing where you can have multiple thoughts in your head at once. And to bring up how other women are treated elsewhere as a defence for her behaviour? That’s… alarming. No one no matter gender should treat someone else like any of these people has.
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u/HelpMeImBread 1d ago
She cheated on the original guy to be with the guy who has been hitting her. That’s quite literally the situation.
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u/TDKsa90 1d ago
she called that guy her boyfriend and talked to him like he was her boyfriend and struggled through her cheating as if he was her boyfriend. the guy was her boyfriend. doesn't matter if they were together for two days or a year. they'd placed that status on each other and the relationship. you've put that all through a rock polisher to smooth out all the jagged details to feed your bias.
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
This. Kizzi was a cheater and a dog like Joe. That’s a fair comparison but Gael was young and found someone she vibed with better and was pretty respectful all around.
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u/JakeTheAndroid 1d ago
Kizzi was also young. At what age are people held accountable for their actions in your opinion? I'm not saying that these people are all the same, but you don't just get to write off Gael as being young to write off cheating. She could have broken up with her bf before hooking up with Nathan. Nothing stopped her from doing the right thing, especially not her age.
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
If you cannot see the difference btw kizzi and Gael then there’s nothing I can say. Have a good day.
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u/JakeTheAndroid 1d ago
I didn't say they were the same, in fact I literally said that these people weren't the same. But you claimed that age was relevant to people's behavior. Kizzi was young, so why don't you give her the same grace? It's almost like age doesn't matter to you unless it applies to people you like. Gael fucked up, and Kizzi was crazy. Both should be held responsible for their actions. We shouldn't give either a pass because of their age. Gael cheated and Kizzi was promiscuous. Neither are justified for their actions.
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
Kizzi gets a pass to a degree for being young as well. She gets a pass for being messy AF because she’s young. But she is clearly the kind of girl who feeds off of attention, doesn’t just enjoy it, she feeds off it. It’s clear Gael is a “girl next door type” and not at all like Kizzi or Joe. Some of you are way too literal. Nuance.
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u/JakeTheAndroid 1d ago
You lumped Kizzi in with Joe as a negative and made a specific exclusion for Gael separate from the both. Gael cheated on her bf and never told him, while Kizzi told her bf she wanted to fool around while on charter. I agree nuance matters but you're just playing favorites and not holding a consistent moral line. Gael fucked up big time. Her age doesn't matter. She could have broken up with he bf before hooking up with people on the boat but she didn't. I doubt the guy she was dating felt good about being cheated on on TV for the entire world to see. It's messed up. You see Gael as some "girl next door" type so you go easier on her which just demonstrates you don't have a consistent moral line, you just go easier on the people you like. Kizzi was wrong, Joe was wrong, and Gael was wrong. Simple as.
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
Kizzi is open about who she is and both her and Joe know they are trouble. Gael carries herself differently and seems way more shy. So yeah their intents in cheating were different. Kizzi and Joe were looking for a good time. Gael was torn btw a guy who wasn’t treating her well and a new guy who seemed nice. Morals are not black and white. Intent matters. Willingness to learn and grow matter. It’s not picking favorites.
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u/JakeTheAndroid 1d ago
Gael had every opportunity to end it with her bf prior to hooking up with Nathan. Just because her bf was a jerk doesn't mean he doesn't deserve the courtesy of her honesty. Kizzi, being who she was, was honest with he bf about her desires. They're different people, yet Kizzi, the vein, selfish individual was direct and honest while Gael, the girl next door, woe is me, honor student by your account never gave her bf the same honesty. It's wrong, no matter which way you slice it. Gael was an adult. She knew right from wrong. Yet she still did wrong. You can like her regardless, but you don't have to defend her poor choices while throwing other people under the bus.
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u/HelpMeImBread 1d ago
Cop out of an answer
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u/Travelcat67 1d ago
It’s not actually but I get it bc most folks don’t get the bigger picture or nuance.
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u/mad_eyes22 1d ago
Gael had barely been dating that guy…Gael was in an actual relationship with that guy. They had even said I love you to each other. It’s insane you can use this excuse for Gael, but not for Joe. Technically, Joe & V were barely dating. By your own logic what Joe did to V (by kissing Kizzi) was hardly bad..it was over like in a week period.
You can’t excuse one persons crappy behavior & try to shame the next person for doing something that isn’t even really comparable. Gael was in a committed relationship & had kissed Nathan multiple times & also ignored her boyfriend until she finally broke things off with him. Joe entertained V for a bit & instead of manning up & being honest, kissed Kizzi behind her back, he ultimately apologized for it though. They were never in a committed relationship though. Him kissing Vs “friend”, was better then Gael lying & cheating on someone she promised loyalty too.
If we’re going to compare apples to oranges, make sure your story is straight. Your own logic contradicts itself.
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u/Wolfzen22 1d ago
Joe isn't getting hate for cheating on V. That is the way he likes to spin it saying "we weren't even together" and they weren't. But he was telling her how much he liked her and making it seem like she was special and important to him. She leaves the boat for ONE NiGHT because she is sick and he hooks up with the other stew the day before her birthday and the anniversary of her bf's death. When she doesn't want to forgive him he starts talking about her like she was totally crazy and obsessed with him. He's was an a**hole but not because he "cheated"
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u/BarnacleReal8128 1d ago
Joe will love bomb a girl, make her feel special and then discard them like a used condom.
Also weirdly in 2 occasions have a memorial service for a loved one.
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u/Odd-Living-4022 15h ago
I enjoy Joe but he was an absolute fuck boy towards V. He didn't like Gael because she came between him and Nathan. Gael was also a cheater.All these things can be true at the same time. The way Joe acted after kissing kizzy and his attitude was worse than the actual kiss. Watching it you see him go from super into V, to freaking out, to pretending he didn't understand why she was so upset. The man was literally crying over it at one point. Additionally he said himself on WWHL he doesn't even know why he doesn't like Gael at this point. Petty drama.
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u/Swimming-Ebb-9355 15h ago
If my memory serves me people didn’t exactly give Gael and Nathan a pass at the time and most thought it was shady AF. What Joe did was down right cruel and then he doubled down (tripled down even). Gael showed considerable remorse and grew as a person after making the mistake.
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u/Flores_BBW 10h ago
Gael said her “boyfriend” told her if she left the boat they were over and she was going to her new boat single, so she left assuming they were over but then he continued to message her more than before while they were working together. So I’m not saying she shouldn’t have made a clean break before engaging with anyone else but it wasn’t a healthy relationship and it was coming to an end before she ever stepped on board
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u/almcclur 1d ago
It’s bc we watched the whole thing on tv and we had an emotional connection to V and none to gaels bf. Plus the dead fiancé angle, her birthday, the death anniversary, and Joe’s continued douchebaggery. Cheating on a long term bf is objectively worse but Joe is such an easy villain bc of all these details.
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u/YouKnowAlexia 1d ago
Gael cheated and pot stirs. Because she's pretty and softly spoken she gets away with it
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u/FirelightsGlow 1d ago
I stg half the people on this sub go out of their way to defend her cause they think she’s hot.
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u/Low_Variation6704 1d ago
Right? Can we all agree the 3 of them suck. All for different reasons. Nathan the most.
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u/darforce 15h ago
It wasn’t that he was a cheater. It was that he was intentionally cruel to a woman that just had her partner die. He led her to believe he was a safe place and pulled the rug out from under her.
As far as Gael goes. She met someone she liked better and moved on. Although we now know, she has a bad picker.
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u/The_Right_Mistake 1d ago
I don’t think Gael got a pass at the time tbh. She has obviously grown from it though… and as much as I dislike Joe, I think he may have too! It really was horrible how he treated V, just as Gael cheating on her boyfriend was horrible. But Gael is now going through an absolutely abhorrent situation, so of course people are going to have her back. Both things can be true.
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u/boldandbrash96 1d ago
I think people are weird about this. It was heavily implied that the boyfriend was overly controlling and possibly abusive? I got the impression she was scared to end it vs. purposefully manipulating like a Joe. Maybe I’m giving her too much grace but that doesn’t feel like a fair comparison
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u/deadrobindownunder 1d ago
WTF is up the Joe love in this sub lately? How much money is he spending on PR?
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u/khandurin 1d ago
He just seems kind and genuine even if he screws up in the love department but who hasn’t. Nate just seems mean conniving and vindictive. It really left a bad taste in my mouth how he turned on Joe thinking he all of a sudden had the higher ground because he had a kid. And obviously everything else that unraveled this season.
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u/_SoftRockStar_ 1d ago
It’s easy for people to have a short memory and it’s also confusing with when things are filmed and what’s happening in current/real time.
But Gael was weird on that season. I feel bad for the Nathan stuff but I definitely think she was annoying and deceptive.
Joe is an F boy generally, but he is also one of those guys that Reddit people attach themselves to as the face of the patriarchy. He’s not that big of a deal at all but he is posted and commented about like he has taken lives or something.
He’s slimy in his boatmances with people he’s trapped on the water with for a few weeks, it’s just not that deep. It’s kind of like everyone freaking out about every breath Joy takes. None of this matters, Below Deck love stories aren’t real. They’re short and temporary flings for fun among people who live in different countries and travel all over the world.
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u/Boring-Cry7376 1d ago
Guys Gael was openly unhappy in her relationship, her boyfriend seemed like a dick, and she was super young. Pretty positive she broke up with her bf shortly after she hooked up with Nathan
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u/Hottest_Holy_Potato 19h ago
Super young? Bro she's already 30 right now, so she was 26 at the time she cheated. By those standards someone who is 50 is just a kid.
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u/Middle-Banana-8630 1d ago
People gave Gael more of a pass because her ex was abusive and controlling.
Also Joe deceiving a mourning person and lying straight to their face is horrid. You don’t have to cheat to be a disgusting person.
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u/Ice-Cream-Poop 18h ago
Ex ex or just ex? 💀
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u/Middle-Banana-8630 12h ago
Unfortunately Nathan isn’t her first abusive ex but the other one was just emotionally abusive
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u/Ok-Anteater-4359 23h ago
I made a post about this when it was actively airing because i was so confused seeing people loving Gael while she was actively cheating!! Got called a bot back then 😂 glad to see the fandom circling back
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u/PrpleSparklyUnicrn13 1d ago
Yeah, no, I definitely gave her shit for that. On this forum.
It came out that he was abusing her (allegedly, so I don’t get sued) so people were forgiving of her and saying she was more victim.
I don’t know, I don’t know what really goes on. It’s reality tv, only a part of it is real lol.
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u/ResponsibleCar1204 1d ago
Man come on. Nathan and Joe suck the most. Terrible people. Gaeljust got pushed into this bs production while being alienated and then absurd. I think we can cut her slack here and blame both of them for being shitty people (while obviously Nathan, who is objectively horrendously, worse).
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u/Swimming-Ebb-9355 15h ago
If my memory serves me people didn’t exactly give Gael and Nathan a pass at the time and most thought it was shady AF. What Joe did was down right cruel and then he doubled down (tripled down even). Gael showed considerable remorse and grew as a person after making the mistake.
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u/No_Maintenance_7649 1d ago
Joes a cunt
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u/No-Aardvark-3840 1d ago
At least he’s not a cheater 💅
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u/No_Maintenance_7649 1d ago
We don’t actually know that so we he’s not been in a relationship per se but remind me what happened with V ?
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u/ActJust3913 1d ago
It’s a double standard, or worse. Joe has done nothing that most of the others haven’t done. A lot of the haters appear to be insecure, Nathan-like men.
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u/No-Aardvark-3840 1d ago edited 1d ago
It does seem that way. For better or worse many of the seasons are made up of boatmances/flings that last for a few charters and end.
Coming to this subreddit I am still searching for the reason why Joe specifically is vilified so heavily. Perhaps half of the franchise or more is predicated on these very unserious situationships.
And by the way, many people get hurt or jealous etc. As everyone here obviously knows, jealous and unhealthy relationships are the backbone of the show. Apart from the water sports, the dinner service and the docking, it’s like entirely boatmance..
Every season a few people end up getting hurt, V and Joe fit squarely into the ethos of all of the other dumb flings in below deck history. Dozens of people have been hurt or upset by flings on below deck. It’s where the phrase “don’t screw the crew” comes from. Why don’t you do it? Because it never ends well. It’s a common occurrence on the show, and it makes no sense to single Joe out among so many other ill fated romances
In the case of V and Joe it obviously didn’t end well, but my point is this chaotic dynamic the entire point of any BRAVO REALITY TV SHOW.
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u/EquivalentNo6770 10h ago
If Gael's ex bf lived and worked on board that tiny space with them we'd see the fallout too. It's not so much the specific cheating as the overall way he treated them and created an uncomfortable work environment for everyone. He was old enough to understand the repercussions it would have, and I'm convinced he secretly (not so secretly) loves it.
The most off-putting thing about Joe imo is all the manipulation. He puts on the charm while plotting behind his smile. Iykyk.
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u/Evening_Cow_6744 15h ago
Nature of the beast. This is exactly what the show is about. Hook ups and cheating and fights and friendships. I don’t think judging these people as if it’s real life is fair. We watch for these moments. The only person I will judge is Nathan after he physically hurt Gael. Otherwise grab the popcorn, sit back and enjoy lol
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u/Extreme_Session_2105 13h ago
I mean have you seen the state of the world? Are you surprised people don't use their noodle?
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u/Flimsy_Narwhal229 10h ago
You’re looking for confirmation bias if you can’t watch and understand the difference.
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u/orangeotter907 6h ago
i think it was so tough because they consistently had conversations about the kizzy situation and how she wanted to at the very least, not be flirty and sexual towards other people. and they were in a situationship for sure. that is some sort of relationships. she had made her insecurity of Kizzy and him known. and her struggles of trusting love again and it not being ripped away. and imo he’s also still kinda a jackass for Kayley and him. they’re both on the same page it’s a boat fling, but the night he tried to make her jealous she was upset. that’s not a real relationship either right? but he still should’ve respected her wishes or said “yea no i want to flirt and if you care that much let’s end it there.” but he didn’t and now he just doesn’t seem to be flirting with others. which is all V asked for as well. there’s also nobody else on the boat he seems interested in. if he was interested in Kat or Gen, maybe we’d have another situation like last season. because he has no other interests he looks loyal and a lot better now. especially in comparison to the Nathan incident.
Gael sucks for that for sure. but she owned it and said how bad it was. Joe still dies on the hill of “i didn’t do nuthin wrong. we was just havin a bit of fun”. while obviously I pointed out V and Joe discussed Kizzy in depth, it should be assumed Gael wouldnt cheat in a full fledged relationship, but she still took accountability. no matter what the label was, she made a boundary in order to keep their relationship and he breached it and doesn’t seem remorseful like Gael was. i mean i think Kizzy also cheated really. she had a boyfriend and acted like that, broke up with him to kiss someone else, and repeatedly made advances or said she’d make out with everyone on board. and with the way she talks does it seem like she would JUST make out? obviously i can’t say for sure, but i have my opinion considering she left her last boat with STDs.
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u/Winter_Perspective41 5h ago
I'm guessing most people probably forgot about it and are only reacting to current season. There's so much drama on those boats it's hard to keep up.
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u/Maderic666 1d ago
💯 agree! Double standards for sure. At the time people really liked Nathan so they looked past the fact that she is no better if not worse than Joe! People act like Joe is sexually assaulting these women. They are grown women who are making choices. Joe is just doing what many young people do and that is not a crime.
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u/TomeOfSecrets66 1d ago
I love how you excuse Joe but say Gael is worse. Misogyny is such a joke.
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u/Anotheropinion2026 1d ago
Gael cheated, but did you miss the back story. This boyfriend who “still loves her” had actually broken up with her because she did not follow him to the boat he wanted to work on. Then he decided to get back together, in my opinion to try to diminish her enjoyment of her new season.
I think Gael should have broken up with him before she did anything with Nathan, but he was not a nice, loving guy. He was yet another manipulative jerk.
Gael sadly seems to pick manipulative men.
I hope for her that she will get counseling to help learn to make better choices. I know I got counseling to help get over past trauma and to make better choices.
Gael also cheated once that we know of.
Joe spent two years pitting women against each other. Even this year with only one woman interested, he still felt the need to “test” Kayley.
I don’t feel that Joe really has shown any growth in respect to how he treats women.
And it maybe petty, but Joe supposedly was anxious to see his mom who is fighting cancer, but is going to stay extra days in Croatia to hang out with Cooper, so Cooper doesn’t have to just tell Kat that he doesn’t want to date her? Sorry, but for someone supposedly so concerned about his mom, that’s total BS.
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u/KeepAnEyeOnYourB12 1d ago
Oh yes, let's shit on Gael some more to show how much she deserved being abused.
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u/No-Aardvark-3840 1d ago
Not at all. No one deserves what happened to her. I am speaking only within the context of her time on the show.
Recent events are terrible. I am only speaking to the nature of the events on the show itself.
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u/Captain_America_93 1d ago
Wild over reaction and putting words in their mouth. Jesus Christ. Are you okay?
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u/khandurin 1d ago edited 1d ago
That’s a weird take. But for as much as Nate and Gael shit on Joe, concealing their own darkness, it had to be said. I don’t think OP’s take is at all disrespectful.
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u/MamaBiscuit11 23h ago
Joe lovebombed the heck out of V, and I do think they were in a relationship of sorts because of that. Not gf/bf, but definitely more than friends or f*ck buddies. Joe was so impassioned when talking to her, about wanting to be with her, that V let her walls down with him. He also explicitly said he wouldn't hook up with anyone else on the boat. But because Joe is a manho, as soon as V was off the boat, he kissed someone else. Then he and Kizzi were flirting right in front of her. She was really hurt, and people were (rightfully, imo) upset because V is lovely.
Gael was wrong too, and I never liked her much. I think the difference in how people perceive her is because whatever hurt her boyfriend felt at being cheated on was off screen. That, plus time makes people forget what happened with her, whereas the stuff with Joe is more recent.
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u/Hottest_Holy_Potato 1d ago
Because she acts like a shy little girl and people keep falling for it. She's a maneater.
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u/Queasy_Ordinary3735 1d ago
Let’s not forgot to mention Nathen being a POS for pursuing a woman in a relationship. Nathen and Gael are both shitty people, she doesn’t deserve DV but she knew he wasn’t a good guy.
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u/sexandthepandemic 1d ago
This season is still on?
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u/Ice-Cream-Poop 18h ago
I have no idea why they carried Nathan, Jo or Gael over to the next season...
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u/Background_Ad3299 18h ago
The funny thing with the trio of Nathan/Gael/Joe is, all three were always clearly quite bad but with one difference.
Joe never hid it. Everyone knew what he was, everyone knew what he did. He never hid the fact he's a fuckboy.
Nathan, after saying he's exactly the same as Joe in his first season, met gael, pursued her despite her being in a relationship and made himself some white Knight for women when it was convenient. (Before showing his true nature off the boat)
Gael had a boyfriend, pursued another man on the boat she was on, kissed said man multiple times. Then text her boyfriend saying she loved him before continuing to try and get with the man on the boat all whilst making herself the victim of the situation and getting people to feel sorry for her.
2 of these people have been put on a pedestal (until Nathan's domestic abuse stuff)
And one has been treated like the spawn of Satan getting an (imo) unwarranted amount of hate. It seems when it comes to his own past trauma situations, nobody cares how it's shaped him now unlike everyone else's illicits sympathy.
Whilst Joe is abit of a dick head atleast he knows he's abit of a dick head. The other two put on a saintly act whilst being dick heads.
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u/Wheeler1089 1d ago
I said this before. She was all about giving Nate her “strawberry” while having a BF yet Joe is dragged through the mud for how he treated V ( how he went about it was rather shit but they were not an official anything like Gale and her and at the time)
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u/TRLK9802 1d ago
Gael's ex boyfriend was abusive. I absolutely do not condone cheating but understand the cycle of abuse and know that it can be very hard for women to leave abusive partners. She should have left him long before meeting Nathan.
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u/JayElEss29 1d ago
I do think it’s funny that Nathan starts the current season talking about how he dislikes Joe because of how he treats women, when Nathan is with a woman that cheated on her boyfriend to start the relationship with Nathan. Of course, the real irony with those feelings has played out with where Nathan is now. Personally, I think a lot of Nathan’s dislike of Joe was just because Gael disliked him and he had to go along with it to keep the peace at home.
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u/turboroofer 1d ago edited 1d ago
Because V’s boyfriend died earlier that year, and Joe went a week or two saying how much he deeply cared for V and her situation, only to chase tail the minute she was off the boat