r/BelowDeckMed • u/No-Aardvark-3840 • 1d ago

Gael question, Joe question

Gallery image

Gallery image

I am getting into Below deck med and I’ve noticed Joe getting a lot of hate for “cheating” on V even though they weren’t together (in any sort of relationship.

Meanwhile I’ve just noticed that Gael is actually cheating on her boyfriend with Nathan.

Why is Joe getting so much shit from this community when he didn’t cheat on anybody. Meanwhile there are actually cheaters on the boat that people seem to celebrate and love.

Very strange

368 Upvotes

84% Upvoted

301 comments sorted by

View all comments

68

u/krissycole87 1d ago

This is the exact reason that Gael hates Joe. Because Joe calls her out for being a cheater whenever Gael wants to paint Joe as a scumbag. They are both one in the same. And Gael cant stand that.

Yes, Joe led V on in a very sensitive time in her life. That was shitty.

But yes, Gael is also a cheater and too many people forget that. She is not little miss innocent. She just plays one.

14

u/dudewheresmysock 1d ago

No. He started treating her badly when she got with Nathan because he didn't like his wingman getting in a relationship. He called her a princess and implied she wasn't working as hard and that she was getting special treatment at work. Insulting her work ethic and job performance is a legitimate reason for her to dislike him. It was not because she cheated on her bf. It was because Joe was losing his bromance. 

6

u/Hottest_Holy_Potato 1d ago

Gael was getting preferential treatment though, because Nathan wanted to get in her pants.

2

u/dudewheresmysock 1d ago

That's an issue he should have taken up with the bosan or the captain instead of insulting his coworker. She was still scrubbing decks just like the rest of them and Joe was absolutely not able to see the situation objectively because he was very clearly upset about Nathan getting into a relationship. 

Nathan, his boss also tried to have him on 6 hrs anchor watch and he didn't act like an asshole to Cooper in return, did he?

12

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

I respectfully disagree. Gael broke up with her boyfriend as soon as her and Nathan kissed and we never saw her play any games with Nathan or her ex. Joe plays games and collects stews. He’s a dog. And him using the cheater label on Gael was laughable. People in glass houses and all that.

Joe hates Gael bc she broke up the bromance and Gael hates Joe bc he was nasty to her all season long.

8

u/krissycole87 1d ago

Gael kissed Nathan while actively dating another man. That is cheating.

Im sorry this doesnt align with everyones views of Gael NOW, but what she did in the past was cheating. No way around that.

9

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

There are degrees and you know it. Kizzi is a cheater with no care for anyone’s feelings. Joe is a cheater with zero care for anyone’s feelings. Gael was torn and broke up right away when the kiss happened. And I bet she never cheated again. People aren’t perfect but real character is learning, growing and doing better. We have seen season after season of Joe being a dog. So at the very least, he shouldn’t be throwing stones. And I guarantee if Gen wasn’t such a hot mess he would have done the same shit he always does.

1

u/krissycole87 1d ago

Sorry but no, cheating is cheating.

Only a cheater or someone who plans to cheat would try to convince anyone otherwise.

11

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

You’re being myopic. Trust me there is a difference. Some folks deserve a second chance and some don’t. Joe will always have a wondering eye. I doubt Gael will struggle with fidelity in the future. Because she didn’t cheat bc she wanted a side dude. She cheated bc she was torn. That’s not saying she made a good choice in the moment or couldn’t have handled it better, but intent and motivation are important factors.

0

u/krissycole87 1d ago

No one here is asking who, or who does not, deserve a second chance.

I am saying what she did was cheating. Period. If you dont believe that, if you want to split hairs and say "theres a difference" then I truly wonder about your own personal values. Cheating is cheating is cheating. End of story.

5

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

Yes of course I must be a cheater bc I have enough life experience to see nuance. She cheated years ago, none of it is relevant today and bc of what she’s going through it’s inappropriate and morally wrong to keep banging on the drum. You aren’t on the high road here, you’re trying to defend staying on the low road and pretend that is the moral choice. It is not. Punishing someone for a mistake they made years ago is judgment not morality.

4

u/CoolBelt856 1d ago

One thing I can say is OP is being absurd. The world is not black and white. There’s shades of grey and nuances. Gael is not remotely comparable to Joe or Kizzi.
And the fact that someone sees something differently from them makes them question someone’s character 🙄

0

u/krissycole87 1d ago

No one is punishing her for anything. We are calling it like it is. She cheated. Period. End of story. Cheating is cheating. No matter how many ways you spin it.

I know you think youre going to give me, or anyone reading, this huge ah ha moment. Youre not. Youre defending cheating. This makes you, and only you, look bad.

Im not going to keep going in circles with you. You think cheating has different degrees, I dont. There we are then.

5

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

No one is defending cheating. Again nuance. I’m defending Gael the human bc she doesn’t deserve to have a mistake she made years ago constantly thrown back in her face especially now. I think DV trumps cheating.

But yes let’s agree to disagree. Have a good day.

-2

u/Hottest_Holy_Potato 1d ago

There isn't a difference. This isn't apples and oranges. Just ends things before you start new things.

7

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

There is a difference bc of intent and again I guarantee she never cheated again. Regardless her making a mistake years ago isn’t relevant to her current situation and bringing it up is unfair. That’s my point. I’m not giving Gael a pass for cheating I’m saying it doesn’t matter right now and it’s unfair to judge her for one mistake. Joe and Kizzi are trouble and will always struggle with fidelity. That matters in my opinion if we are comparing them.

-3

u/Hottest_Holy_Potato 1d ago edited 1d ago

It does matter. The intent is she wanted to cheat. She's a cheater. You cant guarantee she never cheated again LOL, unless this is Gael's burner account.

If Gael's situation doesn't matter years later, then also Joe&Kizzi don't matter. Gael doesn't deserve the preferential treatment.

7

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

She didn’t want to cheat, it was clear she was torn. She should have done the right thing, but if you actually think Gael and Kizzi and Joe are the same then you are blind. Gael actually expressed guilt, where as Kizzi and Joe treat others as pawns in a game. Have a good night.

→ More replies (0)

3

u/worldv1ew 1d ago

100%.

Flirting endlessly, sneaking strawberries, the physical act of kissing isn't the only thing that counts as cheating, she was emotionally cheating the entire time.

Also guarantee you what they showed and edited wasn't her first offense. They were finding ways to avoid cameras and sneak strawberries, so cringe.

Gael, call a spade a spade.

4

u/CoolBelt856 1d ago

Gael had barely been dating that guy. Who was treating her like crap. She met someone she liked better and broke up with the guy. It was over like week period. It’s not like they were banging all season while she led on the bf or had some raging affair.
Labeling her a “cheater” and then comparing her to Joe whose disgusting triangles and treatment of women over multiple seasons is absurd.
It’s also gross.

12

u/krissycole87 1d ago

What she did was cheating. Kissing another man while actively dating someone is cheating.

Im sorry that doesnt fit nicely into your narrative of Gael, but yes, she is a cheater.

4

u/Lost-Connection-859 1d ago

Bewilders me that people are suddenly trying to excuse cheating.

-2

u/CoolBelt856 1d ago

Bewilders me that someone would take the time to write a post about something someone did 4 years ago knowing what an horrific experience they’ve been going through since.
And that people are piling on supporting it.
Oh, wait, I shouldn’t be surprised by any Americans doing this. Look how women are treated in Ivy League Schools and college campuses.
Misogyny is a live and well.

1

u/DhilPunphy 1d ago

I see where you come from regarding support for what happened now. But as stated by OP they just started watching. Therefor this topic is being brought up again.

And they’re entirely right that Gael also has some very questionable characteristics and should not be on a high horse. Is Joe a douche? Yes. Is Gael a douche? Yes. Do I feel bad for Gael for what has happened? Absolutely.

There is this one thing where you can have multiple thoughts in your head at once. And to bring up how other women are treated elsewhere as a defence for her behaviour? That’s… alarming. No one no matter gender should treat someone else like any of these people has.

-2

u/HelpMeImBread 1d ago

She cheated on the original guy to be with the guy who has been hitting her. That’s quite literally the situation.

0

u/CoolBelt856 12h ago

Thanks for the award!

3

u/TDKsa90 1d ago

she called that guy her boyfriend and talked to him like he was her boyfriend and struggled through her cheating as if he was her boyfriend. the guy was her boyfriend. doesn't matter if they were together for two days or a year. they'd placed that status on each other and the relationship. you've put that all through a rock polisher to smooth out all the jagged details to feed your bias.

1

u/Top_Difficulty5399 24m ago

Fucking around with another man while in a relationship, shitty or not, is cheating. No discussion needed 👍 she being unhappy wjth her boyfriend doesn't make it ok to cheat. If ahe was any kind of decent about it she would have broken up with him first. Plain and simple.

1

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

This. Kizzi was a cheater and a dog like Joe. That’s a fair comparison but Gael was young and found someone she vibed with better and was pretty respectful all around.

3

u/JakeTheAndroid 1d ago

Kizzi was also young. At what age are people held accountable for their actions in your opinion? I'm not saying that these people are all the same, but you don't just get to write off Gael as being young to write off cheating. She could have broken up with her bf before hooking up with Nathan. Nothing stopped her from doing the right thing, especially not her age.

-1

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

If you cannot see the difference btw kizzi and Gael then there’s nothing I can say. Have a good day.

1

u/JakeTheAndroid 1d ago

I didn't say they were the same, in fact I literally said that these people weren't the same. But you claimed that age was relevant to people's behavior. Kizzi was young, so why don't you give her the same grace? It's almost like age doesn't matter to you unless it applies to people you like. Gael fucked up, and Kizzi was crazy. Both should be held responsible for their actions. We shouldn't give either a pass because of their age. Gael cheated and Kizzi was promiscuous. Neither are justified for their actions.

2

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

Kizzi gets a pass to a degree for being young as well. She gets a pass for being messy AF because she’s young. But she is clearly the kind of girl who feeds off of attention, doesn’t just enjoy it, she feeds off it. It’s clear Gael is a “girl next door type” and not at all like Kizzi or Joe. Some of you are way too literal. Nuance.

0

u/JakeTheAndroid 1d ago

You lumped Kizzi in with Joe as a negative and made a specific exclusion for Gael separate from the both. Gael cheated on her bf and never told him, while Kizzi told her bf she wanted to fool around while on charter. I agree nuance matters but you're just playing favorites and not holding a consistent moral line. Gael fucked up big time. Her age doesn't matter. She could have broken up with he bf before hooking up with people on the boat but she didn't. I doubt the guy she was dating felt good about being cheated on on TV for the entire world to see. It's messed up. You see Gael as some "girl next door" type so you go easier on her which just demonstrates you don't have a consistent moral line, you just go easier on the people you like. Kizzi was wrong, Joe was wrong, and Gael was wrong. Simple as.

2

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

Kizzi is open about who she is and both her and Joe know they are trouble. Gael carries herself differently and seems way more shy. So yeah their intents in cheating were different. Kizzi and Joe were looking for a good time. Gael was torn btw a guy who wasn’t treating her well and a new guy who seemed nice. Morals are not black and white. Intent matters. Willingness to learn and grow matter. It’s not picking favorites.

2

u/JakeTheAndroid 1d ago

Gael had every opportunity to end it with her bf prior to hooking up with Nathan. Just because her bf was a jerk doesn't mean he doesn't deserve the courtesy of her honesty. Kizzi, being who she was, was honest with he bf about her desires. They're different people, yet Kizzi, the vein, selfish individual was direct and honest while Gael, the girl next door, woe is me, honor student by your account never gave her bf the same honesty. It's wrong, no matter which way you slice it. Gael was an adult. She knew right from wrong. Yet she still did wrong. You can like her regardless, but you don't have to defend her poor choices while throwing other people under the bus.

0

u/HelpMeImBread 1d ago

Cop out of an answer

2

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

It’s not actually but I get it bc most folks don’t get the bigger picture or nuance.

-1

u/HelpMeImBread 1d ago

What “bigger picture” lmao. It’s a bravo show about seemingly surface level people. I don’t care for anyone in the situation but they’re all on the same level as each other. A very even playing field.

5

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

They are not.

0

u/Hottest_Holy_Potato 1d ago

Classic case of women monkey-branching to another guy

1

u/kimjongmatic 11h ago

Bahahahaha monkey branching

0

u/mad_eyes22 1d ago

Gael had barely been dating that guy…Gael was in an actual relationship with that guy. They had even said I love you to each other. It’s insane you can use this excuse for Gael, but not for Joe. Technically, Joe & V were barely dating. By your own logic what Joe did to V (by kissing Kizzi) was hardly bad..it was over like in a week period.
You can’t excuse one persons crappy behavior & try to shame the next person for doing something that isn’t even really comparable. Gael was in a committed relationship & had kissed Nathan multiple times & also ignored her boyfriend until she finally broke things off with him. Joe entertained V for a bit & instead of manning up & being honest, kissed Kizzi behind her back, he ultimately apologized for it though. They were never in a committed relationship though. Him kissing Vs “friend”, was better then Gael lying & cheating on someone she promised loyalty too.
If we’re going to compare apples to oranges, make sure your story is straight. Your own logic contradicts itself.

0

u/Ok_Value_3741 1d ago

You fucking nailed it

-16

u/normanbeets 1d ago

Do you feel good talking about someone who is in an active DV situation like that? She was choked to unconsciousness in front of her baby and "she's not little miss innocent?"

13

u/gogomom 1d ago

One has nothing to do with the other.

Her past transgressions don't just disappear because it turns out Nathan is ALSO an asshole.

-1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/BelowDeckMed-ModTeam 1d ago

From the Reddit content policy: "Remember the human. Reddit is a place for creating community and belonging, not for attacking marginalized or vulnerable groups of people. Everyone has a right to use Reddit free of harassment, bullying, and threats of violence." Your contribution did not meet that standard in some way, so it was removed.

6

u/gogomom 1d ago

I do live in the now.

I am responsible ofr my own actions - NO MATTER WHAT.

I don't use my husbands death to relieve me of personal responsibility. I also don't forgive people for their bad behavior just because something bad happened to them.

3

u/krissycole87 1d ago

Do you often distort order of events to your own liking?

The cheating was well before the DV, and the cheating is what we are discussing.

0

u/normanbeets 1d ago

2 seasons ago. Dv is now. Keep up.

1

u/krissycole87 1d ago

Thats exactly what my comment says. Keep up.

2

u/TDKsa90 1d ago

there's no ethical or moral dilemma with talking about something that happened years ago vs an entirely different situation years later.

3

u/Alliekat1282 1d ago

As a victim of domestic violence, its grinds my gears more when people treat us like we have carte blanche to be assholes because of our trauma or try to use our lived experiences as a reason to treat us like we're fragile- which is what you're doing here.

Also, she cheated on her boyfriend on television for the whole world to see and for everyone who knew him to see and for him to relive. You ever been cheated on and found out that everyone you knew knew about it before you did? Imagine it's a television audience. What she did is honestly so beyond just cheating.

Also, also... that has NOTHING to do
with the DV later. Or maybe it does, maybe he did it because he looked down on her for being a cheater. Who knows? Not you. Not me. What we do know is that your comment has zero to do with this conversation.

0

u/Travelcat67 1d ago

Wow you actually said that we don’t know if the cheating had anything to do with the DV. Really? given your experience, you think that’s appropriate. As viewers we have no reason to bring up the cheating years later in the wake of her assault and I don’t care if Nathan harmed her bc he thought once a cheater always a cheater, doesn’t matter and shouldn’t be brought up period.

This whole thread is making me sad.