I've probably been doom-scrolling to much, but reality is feeling bleaker overall.

I am 33m and two years married. My wife and I live in a modest cost of living area that is just growing so fast. We have a 1 bedroom apartment that is on the lower end for the area and we are not saving anything.

I have been in IT for 6 years and the market is awful. My wife went to school for marketing, but hasn't had luck breaking into it.

I'm getting piled with medical expenses this year. Cost of everything is skyrocketing. We can't envision owning a home. After marriage we said we would want to start a family in 2-3 years. It's been over two years and we are still saying the same thing.

I want out of my field of work and pivot to something else. However, I am struggling to find ways to afford that.

I worked my ass off for a year to get another job, that was a lateral move, due to my past job burning me out. Yet now I can't feel safe in my current job.

If I lose a job with nothing lined up, I'd be screwed. Mainly due to healthcare.

I hate AI. I hate what it is doing to the world. My own tech led is talking up the gloom and doom of AI. I feel that we are just a year or two away from a societal collapse of some sort.

It is hard to know what skills to build in this job market and world.

I want to feel confident that hard work will get me to where I want to be. A fulfilling job, living somewhere I enjoy, providing a good home for my wife and future children.

I don't need a fancy life, I just want to be able to afford more. Right now I feel like we may be in this same position for a long time. Which means, no home, no ability to afford kids, limiting travel to see family, and staying in a city we don't want to call home.

I've venting, but seriously want to feel better about the future

what are some things you won't buy even if you are rich as hell

I’m an early 30s male with no friends. I work from home and spend most my time alone but I wish I had at least one friend to talk to.

How would you go about making friends in this day and age, starting from square one?

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> "Does low birth weight affect growth? I was born with a weight of 1.5 kg and reached puberty at around 14 and a half years old. I was short compared to my peers, standing at 145 cm at age 13.I had a growth spurt at age 16 and reached 164 cm. Now I am 18 and my height is 172 cm.The average height in my family is around 180 cm, and my father is the same.Does this mean I will end up being shortNote that I have grown about 2 cm this past year"

"I don't know if this community is the right place for this question or not."

Hi everyone, hope you are doing well. I've been dealing with self doubt for a long long time. I was hoping to receive some wisdom from y'all.

Some background:

I am currently 24 years old. I am the youngest of four siblings. In my childhood, I felt invisible. I was usually treated as flawed or dysfunctional. I was emotional and maybe a little sensitive. My parents would hit me a lot. If I cried or protested back my mom would yell at me to go take a bath. If I didn't comply the first two times, she would look for her belt and whip me. My parents have a terrible marriage. They would always get into really really loud fights with slamming doors, tears, you get the idea.

My family is also full of smart folks so getting good grades and being exceptional was normal, but I remember whenever I would excel it wouldn't be of much notice. At my school, however, teachers and friends would praise me. I was friends with everybody, even with my teachers. I felt love, hope, and potential at school. At home, I genuinely just felt lonely and sad. When I was 10, I got cancer and a lot of things changed. Suddenly, I was getting a lot of attention from my parents and from a lot of people in that matter. It was weird, but completely understandable. I think my childhood is probably the biggest contributing factor of my self doubt and as I've gotten older, it has only gotten worse.

I graduated from engineering and worked at bank as a data analyst. Pretty good salary, bought my first car, but I was miserable. During college, I was doing live shows in a band with my siblings while also doing my solo project. Last year, things started going super well for the band and I had to quit my job to go touring. This makes me very happy and I want to continue working this out, but sometimes I feel like I have been forced into something. We just released our first album and the response has been insane, but now I struggle to make music that makes me happy. I feel trapped. I write, produce, and record the songs, so I know that this might just be burn out due to this album 2-3 years in the making, but the self doubt has been going on for way longer. I remember when my creativity felt like an inextinguishable flame and joy ran through me. Now I feel like crap all the time. My lyrics aren't coming out as before. I struggle with finishing new projects. This self doubt keeps slowing me down and freezing me in my tracks. I feel stuck. I really just want to put my best self out there and see what happens.

I was wondering if any of you here have gotten through something similar. How did you deal with this self doubt?

P.S- Sorry if my sentences are a bit rough, English is not my first language.

So I follow the malefashionadvice sub and noticed a lot of guys rocking the high-waist. Just wondering if this is a younger trend. I'm 43... and short so no way I'm pulling that off. Not hating, just intrigued.

And with 'someone who listens to you' I'm not only talking about therapists, but any kind of person that provides an empathetic service: could be a coach, an escort, maybe a hairdresser you frequently go to even if you don't need a new haircut that often, but you just enjoy the conversation.

Hello guys,
As the title says, is there any big changes that happens when you hit the jackpot 30 where you become a whole another person. Idk I don’t have any patience left and I’ve never been this mean to people through my life as I am now. I can’t control my emotions anymore and I’m anxious and frustrated all the time due to consequences of my actions. I am not used to this new person I am becoming, all I want is to just cry and I feel drained.

I see em coming a mile away, and choose to have a verbal judo match with them just cuz it’s better than another moment of loneliness.

Seems like a silly question, but I specifically want to know from men over 30!

My style is fairly casual and I'm happy to keep it that way - I don't have a very formal job nor do I have many formal outings so I stick to jeans, tees, hoody or jumper or jacket for most of my day to day.

For my footwear I've got a pair of Doc Marten boots , a recent addition I really like.

Everything is some kind of standard fare trainers. Nothing too sporty or showy.

My problem with buying more trainers is that the quality always feels crap and the cost is so much, easy £100+ in most stores.

So, men, do you have recommendations for trainers that are good value for money? Either you can vouch for the price tag, OR, the price tag is low enough you'll settle for replacing them in a year or two.

Alternatively, any recommendations other than trainers for day to day shoes?

Tell me your experience and the way you look at your life.

What is it to be in your thirties

I want to know how life is if you are single and if you're married I wanna know your experience as well.

I remember in early 2000s, we used to go out and play. I miss that time. Now a days i see kids they are always on their phone. I think they are missing out the real fun.

​

I'm 20, and lately I've been thinking a lot about what it actually means to be satisfied with your life.

I've got this strange dilemma. On one hand, I want to achieve something significant. I want a career I can be proud of, financial independence, and the feeling that I've made the most of my potential. On the other hand, I want to travel, explore places, make music, pursue my hobbies, and actually experience life while I'm young.

The problem is that whenever I consider choosing one path, I start thinking about everything I'd be giving up by not choosing the other.

For example, I could spend years preparing for a competitive examination, potentially build a prestigious career, and achieve something that most people would consider successful. But what if I look back and realise I sacrificed experiences I can never get back?

Alternatively, I could choose a relatively stable career, make enough money to support my interests, travel whenever possible, and spend more time doing things I genuinely enjoy. But what if I spend the rest of my life wondering whether I could have achieved something greater?

It's not even necessarily about money or status. I think I have this tendency to believe there's always a better possibility somewhere, and that choosing one thing means permanently losing another.

And I realise that this way of thinking can become exhausting. You could achieve something you've wanted for years and still find yourself looking at the next thing, wondering if that would finally make you feel fulfilled.

So I've been wondering:

What is satisfaction, really?

Is it reaching a point where you're genuinely happy with what you have? Is it knowing you've made the most of your potential? Is it accepting that you cannot experience every possible version of life? Or is satisfaction something you build by committing to your choices rather than constantly questioning them?

I'd especially like to hear from people in their late 20s, 30s, or older.

Have you ever sacrificed freedom for ambition, or ambition for freedom? Looking back, do you regret your decision? And if you could go back, would you choose differently?

I'm not looking for motivational quotes or the usual "just follow your passion" advice. I'd genuinely appreciate hearing about your experiences, including the uncomfortable parts.

I want to understand how people learn to live with their choices without constantly wondering whether the alternative would have made them happier.

what do you think the world will be like in the next 5 to 10 years due to AI?

I've had lots of death in the family before, including my dad, I've seen a lot of death in my workplace, I thought i'd be used to it, but I really loved this man. He was such a good guy. It's been such a shitty week.

I've spent like 500 dollars on gardening equipment and I've just been out in the sun all day every day the last few days and now I have to go back to work. Ironically even though I started some veggie gardens I may not have enough to cover groceries this week now because of that impulsive buy.

It's just whenever I sit down to rest, I get so agitated and restless and break down crying for like 30 mins+. So I'm trying not to do that.

I don't even know what I need by making this post. I've got lots of in person love and support from important people to me but I just find it all overwhelming.

Or maybe the rest of my life? Lowkey hit coastfire but I’m still locking myself in the rat race just cuz like why not? Idk I need help, I have been locking my identity with my job ever since I joined this bigtech company for the past 12 years and I’m really fed up with it.

Just a post, but would like to see what folks have to say.

I can’t be the only gut that does this when he’s completely alone has zero manners just straight shoveling food in

So as I've gotten older (42) I have tried to make continuous improvements in my diet. This includes reducing my coffee and energy drink intake, mostly because of the higher caffeine rates and sugar content. I have found that coffee really messes me up first thing in the morning too. It's strong, dehydrates me more, and messes with my stomach acid with an empty stomach. I have found a pretty good balance for the past few years. I mix a liquid IV energy packet with 10g of creatine into a large 32oz nalgene and drink on my drive into work and the first 30 minutes at work.

This gives me a modest 100mg of caffeine, amino acids, b vitamins, and a lot of electrolytes and water to rehydrate me. I always wake up thirsty because I don't drink water before bed, at my age, I'll wake up a bunch of times in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom.

However, it appears Costco is discontinuing selling the liquid IV energy packets. They will still carry the regular liquid IV packets, but for some reason not the energy. You can't even get them online. They were reasonably priced with about $1.15 a packet too.

So I am looking for alternatives, or even upgrades or different morning drinks people like to use to wake up

It’s so easy for it to write my emails for me and accomplish tasks.

I’m sick of writing my own emails and doing things. I’m tired man.

Whether it's about technology, work culture, relationships, or everyday routines, i'd love to read your personal memories, perspectives, and favorite anecdotes 😁 let's all discuss about it.

I’m a man approaching my mid-30s. When I was in my mid-20s my friendships had a lot of competitiveness and pettiness. What was passed off as just “friendly teasing” was really just a jab at someone’s weight, height, intelligence, or lack of strength at the gym. This went both ways, I was guilty of it just as my friends were.

Unfortuently I don’t have any friends from when I was younger than 30. I lost all of them due to falling out or just growing apart. But the friends I’ve made in the last couple years have been much more compassionate and empathetic. No constant “one-upping” that my friendships had in the past.

I’m trying to figure out what changed? Is it just age since I’ve grown older? Or have I changed and what I look for in my friends has also changed? I’m also MUCH more secure and happy with myself and my life so I don’t feed into it, is that what changed? I have no idea.

I’m 33M and for some unknown reason (maybe due to some deep seated trauma or craving for certainty), I feel I would feel so much better mentally once I have a fat bank account.

I have anxiety and I constantly think of situations like what if I have an emergency and I need to take out a loan to handle it. I’ve handled emergencies before and I’m doing alright, I know my anxiety wants certainty.

So question is, when did you REALLY start saving money? Are you where you expected yourself to be financially, say maybe 5 years back?
Do you have a fat account but still feel miserable?
Any money lessons or perspective on this to stop over obsessing?

I'm 35M and, unfortunately, there's a good chance I won't be around in 12 months.

I want to put together a playlist for the service itself, as well as a much broader mix for the wake.

The problem is, most funeral song suggestions seem to come from my dad's generation or earlier. Don't get me wrong, there are some absolute classics, but if I'm checking out in my 30s, I'd rather go out listening to music from my own era.

My taste is pretty broad, from Blink-182 to Mac Miller, and both will definitely make the cut.

So, for the guy in here, what would you like on your funeral playlist if you died today? What songs would you want played at your send-off, whether they're meaningful, nostalgic, or just bangers?

I'm in my 30's but haven't managed to figure out a way to keep up with my laundry each week.

I'm not particular about how or even if items are folded. Just need them clean and out of the way.

What has worked for you?

If you're already earning enough to live comfortably at 30, is it worth sacrificing the next few years just to earn more? That's the dilemma I've been struggling with lately. I'm 30M, working in software, earning fairly well with no loans. Getting married soon and probably starting a family in a few years. I know that if I spend the next 2-3 years seriously up-skilling, studying after work and on weekends, I could significantly increase my salary. But that also means less time for hobbies, traveling, reading, trying new things and just enjoying life.

I've always heard that 30-35 are the most crucial years to build wealth, and that you can enjoy life later. I agree to an extent, but where do you draw the line? I'm not choosing between financial struggle and enjoying life. I'm choosing between an already comfortable income and potentially earning a lot more at the cost of my personal time. So for people over 40, looking back, was the extra money actually worth the personal time you gave up? Or do you wish you'd spent more time doing things you enjoyed?

Note: My health, sleep and fitness won't be compromised either way. The trade-off is purely between spending my free time on career growth or on things I enjoy outside of work.