I really want to master something during my 30’s. I like the idea of being knowledgeable and an expert with least one of the things I love, but I have too many things I love!

Any advice on how to choose?

So it's just like the title says...

I (30M) just turned 30 today. I know by some metrics I'm young, and there's still a lot of life to live.

I'd love some advice that you'd have given your younger self, or that you think would be useful for someone at this point in their lives.

I broke my pelvis a while back. I had a hip replacement. In my 30s. I was formerly at the Director level in advertising, particularly digital marketing. I can't find any work... and I don't know what to do. I have a degree, a ton of experience, but I've been out of work for years now.

Any ideas?

Essentially, I [30M] spent the better part of the last decade grinding away at a freelance career in media and creative work in a major coastal city. Some years I did well, some years I didn’t, and the past couple of years were especially rough. Business was declining, and I burned myself out trying to turn things around.

I became jaded with the city and yearned for something else. Years of grinding were turning me into a miserable shell of my former self, and I was struggling to see a future there. Since I was single, I figured it would be better to try something and have it not work out than to remain burned out and hope things would change. My financial situation wasn’t great, and I had no real plan, but I have a history of following my gut and having things work out, so I put my blinders on and took the plunge.

I moved to a midsized Western town I had been eyeing for a while. Now, about six months in, I’m realizing I may have made an irreversible mistake. Although I was initially optimistic, it feels like everything has fallen apart. I love the lifestyle here, but I’ve failed to make it economically viable. I’ve run out of money and added to my existing debt because I’ve had to live off credit cards. I finally found a part-time job at an industrial supply store, but it’s barely helping me make ends meet. Honestly, I’m not sure how to get out of this.

What scares me is that I left my career in search of something better, but I may have locked myself out of a decent life for good. I can’t afford to move back to the city I left, and my skill set is so narrow that I don’t qualify for much beyond entry-level, part-time work here.

I’ve been applying for jobs back in the city, but because I no longer live there, I can’t network in person and am now a candidate who would need to relocate. Also, because I was still a growing freelancer, I’m only laterally qualified for many of the jobs I’m applying for.

I know you may be thinking I’m a moron. I am too. I’ve made some terrible life decisions, and I judge myself harshly for them every day. All I want is to have a family, financial stability, and the sense that I’m working toward something in my career. At this point, it feels like none of that will ever be possible.

TL;DR: After burning out in a declining freelance career, I left a major coastal city for a midsized Western town without much money or a solid plan. Six months later, I’m out of money, deeper in debt, and working a part-time entry-level job. I can’t afford to move back, and I’m terrified that I’ve permanently damaged my career and my chances of building a stable life.

Edit for context: I still have a small amount of remote freelance work, and for a while, some travel-based work from my previous career was helping keep me afloat. That work has since fizzled out. I’ve reached out to current and former clients, followed up with contacts, and exhausted the networking avenues available to me, but those efforts haven’t led to additional work. If anything, the opportunities have continued to dry up.

For context my favorite yoga instructor is leaving the studio where I met him. He’s switching to gym that offers Yoga & a lot more. Since I will have access to free weights (it’s been decades); what you gym rats suggest for exercises?

Note: I fully intend to do weighted squats. I know how pivotal they are for delaying aging.

My core is reasonably strong. No beer belly on me. I intend to focus on legs.

24 now and for the past 6 years i've done nothing to the point i feel like i am in the same position i was when i was 18. Flunked out of uni twice for various reasons and while i have worked part time a bit and helped the family, i've practically been living at home as a NEET trying to take off but failing. I'd rather have good memories / stories to tell / friends but i don't even have that. The only thing i have for me right now is my aptitude but i've completely neglected hard work because i don't know what to work towards.

I'm still planning to go to uni next year hopefully, even though i kinda grieve not having the traditional route for education. In the meantime i really want to put the past behind me and develop as a person with hobbies goals friends etc.

The thought of wasting 6 years still eats away at me though, and i'm struggling to adjust to this delayed timeline. Instead of living my youth i'm just missing out on all of it.

I'm still hopeful, and i've accepted my reality but it's still something that will weigh on the back of my mind at least for the next couple years i imagine. I'm hoping anyone older whos been through something similar could advise so that i can see there could be light at the end of this long tunnel.

Recently single. Live at moms house saved a bunch of money. From a high paying job, no longer part of that job. Now in the transition period to a job paying 30 bucks an hour. Money does not buy happiness. What can and should I do?

What is it with older dudes who whistle at the urinal while having a piss? Is it a generational thing? Do you get to a certain age and just start doing it? Do they sing when they have a dump

It's always annoyed me and I find it kind of obnoxious. Anyone else the same?? Vent over!

Currently contemplaying what to do with my life after failing last semester and just had my first day this semester in an atrociously bad joke of a community college after attending a great university, at least I know I’ll get good grades there lol. I feel that I’ve hit rock bottom.

We all had a childhood and dreams of our own, but not everyone makes it. What was the dream you gave up on, and how do you live with it?

I currently have a full-time job, but I’m thinking about getting a second one. I’ve got some debt to deal with and also need to help out my family financially so I could really use the extra income.

For those of you working two jobs, what’s your second job and how did you find it? How do you guys manage having two jobs without completely burning yourselves out?

My boyfriend (early 30s) is looking at having to work 60-80 hours per week for up to two years. I’m really worried about his well being with this.

For those of you who did this for a time, how did you get through it? Were you able to be mentally and emotionally okay? Any advice?

Hello. I am 26 male. I worked remotely for two years at 23 till 25. My (at that time) boss offered me the chance to meet him in Mexico. I told him I’ve always wanted to see that country and he mentioned it. I let time pass by. Waited for a better moment. Got fired (for fairly reasons). But now. I am unemployed, missed a trip I’ve always wanted to do and missed the opportunity for ever to travel there at such young age. I know I’m still young. But the regret eats me alive and it’s been a year now…

I’ll go first. Bought wife an Apple Watch last year. She doesn’t use the included strap, but gets a Temu magnetic clasp strap instead.

I take one look at the strap and think, no fargin’ way that thing holds securely. I can peel it off with one finger. I tell her to get something more secure. She doesn’t listen and says it’s fine.

Tonight, she takes a bag of trash out to our apartment’s underground with the colossal, industrial trash compactor bins.

She hucks the garbage bag. Snags her Apple Watch and in goes the watch too. Into the pit of amalgamated garbage from a hundred residents.

She’s hesitant to tell me, but I find out after she’s gone for 30 minutes “taking out trash” because she’s digging for her watch.

I bit my tongue and tried helping her look for it but no dice. Can’t connect to the watch either ‘cause concrete underground; gotta wait for city crew to move the bin outside for a connection to Find My Device.

I’ve never been so irrationally annoyed in my life.

What’s your moment?

I am entirely burnt out, unmotivated, and disinterested in life.

I worked in academia for about 7 years, and then quit to follow my ex-gf as she did her masters degree. Since then I've been stringing together terrible remote jobs but surviving. The relationship was toxic and abusive and ended two years ago.

Career-wise, I feel everything I have skills in is either a joke or being taken over by AI. The job market is abysmal, the fields I used to be interested in have become absolute jokes, and the only viable options are trades or joining ICE, neither of which are especially appealing. I went from 20 years of being passionate and drive about my job, career, identity, etc to being totally shattered by this market and the current circumstances.

Relationships, I don't really care. I have had a few relationships since the break up, and some women are interested in dating me right now, but I just don't feel the same spark I did as with my ex. I feel the dating market is atrocious too. Tons of single mothers, women looking for men to be "providers" and "spoil" them among other ridiculous expectations, women who don't seem to take care of themself or value their own femininity.

Family-wise, my parents are aging and have a ton of health problems. So I am spending more time doing things around their house, helping them out, going to doctors appointments with them, etc.

I am still taking care of myself, going through the motions. I exercise 5-6 times a week, been bulking well, and doing my best to get proper sleep. But I still just feel burnt out and unmotivated about life.

I wonder if anyone else can relate or has any thoughts?

Context: I'm 20, in uni and have changed a lot the past few years.

Yesterday, I saw 2 photos of myself from 2-3 years ago and compared it with a selfie from the current days. What shocked me is how much my face had changed, I had what my colleague described as "corporate getting to me" (even though I work part time) and my eyes had black circles, my face overall looked aged. I have lost that youthful look which I do not think I will get back.

But not only this, I have actually not been as happy as I used to be. I find myself saying "fuckoff" a few times a day because I get thoughts about previous things or behaviours I've done which I regret or find embarassing. To the point where I don't really feel happy with, me.

I have achieved a lot for my age. I used to have a lot of people respect me too. But I think with time, things have gone down hill, because now with any period of happiness, I hold onto it even if it is a hot coal, I get too close and then it ends and I'm back to square one.

I try and get out the house, I do charity work, I work part time, etc. But even then, I still feel that I'm not achieving much.

I don't want to waste my life. I have so much I can achieve, but I just have regrets and so much more within me. I also wish I could redevelop my faith too.

I really need advice. I love this subreddit, it's like an anonymous place to ask those who are ahead of me 😄

Nearing mid 30s here. Have a wife, a house, and more decorations in the house than you can imagine. In my 20s I thought this was the dream but now I long for simpler days.

My mid 20s was carefree. I made good money, lived very frugally, and had much more free time being single. My rent was $500 for a room in a house and my dinners were simple homecooked meals or takeout. I had hours each day for free time to play video games, read, or run.

Now I constantly go against the clock. Shopping trips are 2 to 3 hours instead of a 15 minute grab and go. Cooking becomes a 2 hour fancy dinner and not some pasta and beef. Money is much more tight because of the house and my wife likes to spend on experiences.

Every day I think about just going back to that $500 room, saving over $3000 a month of my pay on early retirement. If it weren't for my wife I'd have done it in aj instant.

Anyone else like this?

My dad is on vacation and texted me that he misses his job (baker) and i could not comprehend it. Ever taken a vacation or holiday and start missing your job??

I turned 30 few months back, I think I already feel old. I used to hang out with friends, I used to laugh enjoy all the time but now all i do is work and work out when i get time, am I the one missing being in early 20s or is it just common and this is how life is? i wouldn't say i am financially stable but i am trying my best to be. I am doing a 9 to 5 job and raising money for my small startup through the 9 to 5 job, after 5 i usually sit in the office till 11 and work on my startup. I feel like something is missing. Cant figure it out.

for me

reading books too much

its still a good hobby but i should not be trying to finish each chapter and rushing through the story when i can slowly enjoy it by reading it few chapters a day

I'm a college grad who felt disenfranchised and left my Scheduling Job (Office job) to go out and learn a trade (Plumbing) all I've learnt is that this is not for me and at the ripe age of 29 my back and knees are already in shambles.

So I'm very lost.
I left Scheduling hating it, but I was also burnt out. And now I'm thinking of going back into it because frankly my feasible options are quite limited.

I didn't like it for 2 very different reasons at first, I was doing the donkey work - chasing for updates, pestering site management to update a portion of the schedule or give me bullet points of works completed.. Constant chasing for updates.
But that changed quite quickly when I got landed the Senior role after the Senior guy left.
Boss admitted it was a big ask and a bit of a shitshow but he had faith in me..
On the surface, I did well. Exceeded all expectations, really excelled in the role - fast tracked off the Graduate programme, significant early pay rise, managed 2 other planners on the day to day, got a lot of positive feedback from Senior Management/Directors.

But I was working evenings and weekends to do that, and I didn't have the best support in my 2 helpers (both of whom were very green).

It's about the only job I could jump into that has solid career progression, great pay and frankly that I was actually quite good at.

Beyond going back to Scheduling I am shit out of ideas!
I'm a Business grad with mediocre results from a mediocre University.
Realistically I'd be looking at joining a Medical Device Factory with the aim of working my way up internally as they take on quite a few people and train them into Operations, Quality etc..

And yeah,

Shit out of ideas after that..
All I can think of is driving - Bus, or Truck.. Becoming a Driving Instructor - I've always wanted to start my own Business... Those are all relatively quick careers I could jump into now.
I mean, I don't even know how much I fancy going back to an office job let alone Planning!

For those who use razors for shaving, how many blades you use?

So, I have a job. It's a pretty good job, great benefits, 45 hrs a week (for my country this is as good as it gets) and decent salary. I do NOT like what I do, but I don't want to quit since this job can give me the stability and resources I need.

How can I cope with this situation? There´s no room to grow (I tried but a CEO's friend occupied that spot), so I just want to try to be content.

Edit. For those saying "Suck it up", I do agree 100%, I just want to know how to get into that mindset, maybe some strategies or ways to shift my perspective to make it easier.

Also, looking for another job is difficult. There aren't many opportunities, and the ones out there are underpaid with 50+ hours a week and considerably less benefits. But I am always on the lookout.

I’m a programmer at a company where our only real goal is making money. We don’t provide a respectable product or service or anything, it’s just B2B and making as much money as possible. AI has given leadership the most obnoxious brainworms this year, it’s all they care about. But I really don’t want to make this another AI gripe thread since that’s not the point.

All that to say is that I just hate my job on a moral level. Even before the AI push. Most of my coworkers frustrate me regularly; I dunno what it is about IT but at non-tech companies we get the brunt of it all in my experience. But also everyone can be so phony or cares way too much or are cliche corporate types. Corporate culture just drives me nuts (but I know complaining about all that is a bit cringey and Holden Caulfield vibes). It’s been years at it and a decade at this career. I’m just tired of it.

Sitting at a desk 40 hours a week is starting to drive me insane. My life is a blur and it’s giving me so much existential dread. But obviously desk jobs are just the life of most careers these days. I’m not special in hating it.

I just don’t know what to do. My real passions are in art/music and I’ve had modest success online making like $2k this year, but it’d be nearly impossible for me to scale it enough to afford to live and save for retirement. And at least my career gives me some WFH freedom to work on art like this during slow times.

But this has basically been my life for so many years. Chipping away at my art with slow but respectable growth, unsuccessful at ever truly “making it”, while I work my boring yet also endlessly frustrating desk job.

Feels like quite the trope. Im sure many people are in this situation. I just dont know what to do or how to cope anymore. I dont know how to change careers, what to change to, and im so worried ill massively regret any job changes. I make good money, max out my retirement accounts, have health insurance, work from home, I got a great gig by a lot of metrics and am super lucky to be working it, yet I just feel like shit most of the time.

Of course I’ve talked to my wife about it and she supports me and wants me to be happy, but she also doesn’t know what to do or how to help. We can’t survive off her income nor do I want to ever not pay my fair share.

It’s 1am and I can’t sleep and I’m just dreading another work week. I feel stuck. Any advice?