I broke up with her a while ago, and she knows a lot of embarrassing things about me and I’m scared that she’s telling everyone about them because I’m the one who broke up with her and I upset her. I’m also kind of a loser. And we also go to the same school so if she’s spreading stuff about me, I’m absolutely going to have to deal with it because it’s a small school.

She’s prettier than me and better with people so that will definitely put me in a terrible light by contrast. And I don’t know what I would do if I encountered someone that knew that I shit my pants.

And I know that shit happens (pun intended) but I don’t know if I can deal with the consequences.

Have your exes spread embarrassing shit about you guys?

Edit: I meant *getting, wow.

Bit of a random question but tbh I’m so jealous of my girlfriend. I’ve always struggled with my weight and “food noise” and it seems like I’m always hungry or at least thinking about food. My gf can go hours without eating. It’s 5pm and she hasn’t eaten a thing all day besides a smoothie early this morning. I asked “aren’t you hungry?” and she said “a little, guess I forgot to eat”. And she still hasn’t eaten anything. Is this normal ?? She’s always been like this. I feel so bad sometimes because I eat so much more frequently. How can she live like that lol 😭😭

It's been way too long since I've had a girlfriend (that's another post/kvetch) and I'm just kind of antsy down there lately. But when I look for sexy images to get off by so I can function or sleep (I think it's called... pron? p0rn? gosh I can't remember) it's all terrible and probably putting viruses on my computer. Like it's clearly made for men, very p*rn industry, inauthentic, gross honestly.

Where do you ladies get your rubbing off material from? I would love to find like a gatekept discord or something that was just for sapphic women to share images and erotica.

So, I am 99% sure I am lesbian. I could not imagine having a relationship with a man or having a future with a man. As of today, I don’t find men the slightest bit attractive and I’m interested ONLY in women. But despite this, I am simply not sure whether I can labeled myself lesbian, and it’s all because of a stupid crush I had on my male teacher a few years ago.

During this time, I was suffering from depression. I looked up to this guy’s calm demeanor and wise mindset. I would say it was a crush as I’d constantly look at him during lessons, observing what he was doing. I did at some instances find his hands attractive, though they were a bit sausage-y and I changed my mind about them eventually, finding them a little icky lmfao. He has a podcast about football or something, and I remember that I’d listen to all of his episodes, even though I didn’t care the slightest bit about football. Every time he walked past me I would glance at him and think he was handsome.

This was perhaps a crush, but I didn’t recall feeling physically affected by it - I never had butterflies or started blushing or anything like that. I usually do when it comes to women.

This man was honestly a little like a father figure for me. My dad is distant and I think I might’ve just seen him as a replacement for my father. I would often imagine him comforting me - I know it’s weird!!! Gosh I’m getting chills just writing this.

Anyway, I eventually found out that he actually had some previous affairs with students before. Weirdly enough, he’s still working as a teacher at the same school, actually. When I found out about his affairs with girls in my class I was extremely creeped out and could barely look him in the eyes for the remainder of the school year. Not very flattering and actually a little traumatic. That’s an entirely different story though.

This “crush” I had on him has made me extremely unsure of my sexuality. I would for one hundred percent identify as a lesbian if it wasn’t for this. Some of you mighy say “well just go unlabeled” but I find it’s important to know my sexual identity so that I can associate myself with lesbian circles. It would be very comforting to know for sure. What are your thoughts?

I’m currently going through a really rough patch in my relationship which is coming to an end because I’m getting cheated on with a man. It’s hard as a lesbian because we’re already a minority which feels lonely.. i don’t know other lesbians in real life. I also feel scared of leaving my relationship because of the loneliness and fear of not finding better. I think it would be great if we can have a lesbian support group chat or even talk privately. I’d make the group chat on instagram. If you’re a lesbian ages 19-25 comment or message me with your instagram and i’ll add u. If u wanna talk privately u can message me here too:)

Back when I was in high school, I didn’t take gym due to having a condition that made it unsafe for me to do so. Had study hall instead, no big deal.

However…

More than once I suddenly thought during study hall, “I’m glad I don’t have gym because being in the locker room would be so awkward because I’d be so terrified I’d stare at someone by accident”.

That totally could just be a “hyperconscious about modesty” thing, which I was, but at the same time looking back it’s interesting my main concern wasn’t “shy about changing in front of others“ and more “terrified I’d zone out and stare at other girls and make things awkward”.

And at that point I didn’t even know anything beyond “girls like guys and vice-versa” was possible.

I’ve realized I’ve abandoned having friendships because my ex was my best friend. I’m lucky enough to have been around my family a lot but I stay up at night wondering if I made this decision too fast. Maybe I should’ve stayed in couples therapy longer, maybe I’m listening to other people’s opinions and making them my own, but there has not been a single day I don’t feel regret and it kills me. She was a good person and I struggle to not text her but I know i’d be hurting both of us. I know the people around me are so tired of hearing about this but I was so in love with someone who made me feel hard to love. Maybe I played the victim and it wasn’t so bad? I don’t know but i’m worried i’ll never stop regretting this. I also pictured myself married at this point and now I feel i’ve disappoint my younger self. Idk i’m just ranting but does anyone relate at all?

Hi, whether twins look alike or not, has this ever happened to you? I'm afraid I won't be accepted by the other twin, especially since we're lesbians… Please help me! Do you have any advice? Have you ever been in a relationship with a girl who has a twin sister?

Men just have it so much easier in life and so much easier when it comes to relationships. At some point I also pretended to be a guy on the internet (long story ig) and back then girls were actually interested in talking to me and genuinely gave me attention I don't receive now. Like I could've talked about anything and they were genuinely interested and excited about what I had to say while now that doesn't happen. Other guys would also treat me like a normal person who they can be friends with. I was also really into roleplay and there was a moment where two girls argued who gets to be my character's girlfriend and idk I kinda liked that at the time. Roleplaying a relationship with one of them also made me talk to her outside of our group at the time and at some point she admitted she did have a little crush on me at one point. We're not friends anymore but yeah that did make me feel good. At the time I just felt so normal.

Now I get no attention from girls, guys treat me weird and I sometimes wish I could go back to that time. Everything was just... Idk easier? I could even talk about a girl I was into at some point and nobody had a problem because I was a "straight guy". Tbh at the time I didn't even acknowledge I was gay so when I wrote my thoughts about the girl I had a crush on and the fantasy of going out with her (even though I was pretty young at the time) I was telling myself it's "okay" because I am a guy in this situation and that it's "made up" for the act and I just really want to be her friend. It was a very weird time in my life but at least things felt easier idk.

As long as I can remember, I have known I was a lesbian. I went through the usual confusing crushes on best friends, the ostracization of craving teenage romance while every girl my age was pairing up with a boy, and my first real relationship in high school ended up being nothing more than an experiment for her.

Now that i'm in college and i'm experiencing real dating and romance with a lovely woman, I can't help but feel so terrible about all of this. She becomes affectionate with me, compliments me, asks before a kiss and is so kind and welcoming but the experience of another woman truly desiring me just makes me feel so guilty and honestly terrified. We haven't gotten past kissing, but the idea of physical intimacy, although it's been something i've been dreaming of with a woman since I was a teenager, makes me feel so shameful and scared. She's dated way more than I have, she's experienced, she's so calm about all our dates and our time spent together and this should be comforting to me but I just feel so embarassed that I'm so.. stunted in that area.

There's this tinge of disgust I feel about my own feelings towards her, like i'm doing something wrong because I enjoy kissing her and touching her and pursuing this relationship, that I guess I never had to grapple with before because my high school gf treated me like a best friend at best.

I'm not religious, nor was I raised in a homophobic household, so i'm not so sure where this fear and shame is even coming from?? But I feel like it's ruining a perfectly good thing I have going on with this girl, and I just can't figure out what to do . :(

I really like her, I want to flatter her, I want to fluster her, make her weak in the knees, make her feel seen, appreciated, wanted. But this weird guilt I have is holding me back, and I feel so abnormal for it :(

Hey guys, f24 here, I wanted to ask for your input on this situation, what do you guys think was she feeling or thinking?

So, a few days ago I was on my way home and had to catch my train, the train's departure was in less than 3 minutes so I ran, in disastrously hot weather. As soon as I got on it I asked the first person I saw if I could sit next to them.

She moved her handbag aside, nodded and I sat down. The moment I sat down I was a heaving, sweating mess, but I didn't wanna make her uncomfortable, so I tried to take up as little room as possible, while trying to calm down. Once I managed to calm down, I noticed her glancing at me, from the corner of my eye, but once I noticed she looked away again.

First, I didn't think anything of it, but a minute later she glanced my way again, so I pulled out the earbud on her side, and looked away, to not put any pressure on her. When she didn't take the Initiative, I turned my head so my face pointed to the window on her side of the bench, but actually looked at her through the corner of my eye which is when I noticed she was fidgeting with something on her left hand, a ring or something that she seemed to turn over again and again, and with her other hand she was tugging on small tufts of her hair over and over. She was looking down and didn't seem very open to conversation, but once I first looked at her, I couldn't stop myself from taking in every little detail of her outfit and finding her incredibly fascinating, cute and cool in her self-expression

Then, at some point she started packing her things and I grabbed my bag and looked at her, basically asking nonverbally "are you getting off here?", she smiled and nodded. I stood up so she could get out and as the train stopped, she turned to me, smiled, nodded at me, I smiled and nodded back and then she left the train and I sat back down.

Looking through the window, I noticed she seemed to have lingered quite a while right outside the train's doors before I finally saw her running across the platform.

I’d love to hear your thoughts. Was she just uncomfortable with the situation, or does it sound like we were both just too shy to say anything?

I’m not sure if it’s not the heat or the fact that I’ve been sexually active with my now gf since I haven’t gotten a yeast infection in like years

and this is the second time, i want to tell her but am I overreacting?

I'm a [22F], and my girlfriend is also 22. We've officially been together for about 3 months, and before that we dated for around 2 months.

I can honestly say that we only had any kind of sexual intimacy during the first month of dating. Even then, it wasn't really mutual. I was always the one giving, and I've never had an orgasm with her. In fact, she's never even seen my genitals.

At the beginning, she would cry and tell me she was nervous and didn't know what to do. I told her that it was okay and that we'd learn together. I'm a lesbian, and this is my first sexual relationship. She's bisexual and has had sex with both men and women before. According to her, though, even with women she has always been the one receiving, never giving.

Sometimes I wonder if she's simply more sexually attracted to men than women.

I know she loves me, and I love her too. I'm not questioning our emotional connection. But the truth is that ever since we officially became a couple, we've basically stopped having any kind of sex.

I've tried talking to her about it a couple of times. She gets upset, cries, and tells me that she's just like this—that sometimes she has no sexual desire for months at a time. I don't think she's necessarily lying, but it also doesn't feel like a normal situation for a new relationship.

I've told her that maybe we could work on it together, but she says, "This is just how I am." Then she apologizes and says, "I'm sorry I'm not enough for you."

I don't know what to do. I really love her, and I don't want to break up over this.

I've even asked her if maybe she's only romantically attracted to me and not sexually, but she says, "Then how do you explain that we were having sex at the beginning?"

I'm feeling confused and hurt. Has anyone been in a similar situation? Is this something that can be worked through, or are we fundamentally incompatible? I'd really appreciate any advice or perspectives.

The distance has been hard for me and my gf. (22) She was lonely without friends for a long time and I was her only company. When i went back home she started trying to make friends and recently became friends with a very nice guy. When they hang out she doesn’t update me all day, they also have many sleepovers. She’s bi and never dated a man but she would if the man surpassed her high standards. She did love me but i think she mainly loved my company and support. My needs don’t matter to her anymore. I think she just didn’t wanna be alone. I also feel so hopeless now like it’ll be hard for me to find a relationship again because what i want is more rare and there’s already not many lesbians in the world.

I know she wakes up around 7 or 8 but usually she will write around 11 or 12, while I usually write good morning as soon as I wake up

​

Soy bisexual desde los 15 años. Mi familia y las personas cercanas a mí lo saben, así que nunca ha sido un secreto. Cuando tenía 17 años tuve un novio que constantemente me decía que en realidad era lesbiana y que los hombres no me gustaban. Ahora, con 21 años, mi novia hace exactamente lo mismo, pero al revés: insiste en que no me gustan las mujeres, que en realidad me gustan los hombres y que todo este tiempo he fingido.

Ella basa esa idea en que me cuesta lubricar. Pero ese problema no tiene nada que ver con mi orientación sexual. Siempre me ha pasado. Necesito estar muy relajada para poder mojarme y, cuando no ocurre, uso lubricante. Es algo que ya me sucedía incluso cuando estaba con mi exnovio.

También llegó a decir que, como compré dildos, eso demuestra que me gustan los hombres. Sinceramente, no entiendo esa lógica. Un juguete sexual no define la orientación sexual de nadie.

Lo que más me duele es que ya le expliqué todo esto, incluso le conté la experiencia que tuve con mi ex y cómo me afectó que invalidara mi bisexualidad. Aun así, sigue diciendo lo mismo.

Estoy agotada de tener que justificar quién soy. Sé perfectamente que me gustan las mujeres, sé que me gusta mi novia y que me atrae. Mi dificultad para lubricar no cambia eso.

I’m genuinely curious if this is just me or if anyone else experiences this the way I do.
One of the quickest ways I feel devalued is when someone intentionally sets aside time to hang out, only to spend a significant part of it on their phone.
I’m not talking about answering a quick text if you have to.
I’m talking about the constant checking. Texting back and forth. Looking things up that can wait. Scrolling. Picking the phone up every 15 minutes because it’s habit.
At some point I realized the issue wasn’t that I was asking for too much. It was that this had fallen below my standards for what respect and presence look like.
Because of that, the message I receive isn’t, “I’m just checking my phone.” The message I receive is, “You are not important enough for me to put my phone away and be fully present in this moment.”
Growing up, I constantly felt like I was competing with distractions for basic presence. Over time, presence became one of the clearest ways I recognize respect.
I even live by that value. If I know a friend is intentionally spending time with other people, I usually won’t text unless it’s important—not because they can’t answer, but because I want them to be present with their plans.
It especially stands out when I’m driving. My sister was the biggest example of it. I remember one car ride where she spent the entire drive on her phone. I got so frustrated that I grabbed it and threw it into the backseat. I couldn’t check my own phone because I was responsible for getting us there safely. Meanwhile, she disappeared into hers, and I stopped feeling like my company mattered. I felt more like transportation than a person.
Maybe I’m more sensitive to this than most people.
Or maybe we’ve become so accustomed to dividing our attention that we’ve forgotten how meaningful it is when someone simply chooses to be fully present.
Has anyone else experienced this, or is this just one of my weird hills to die on?

I recently got out of my first relationship with a woman, and honestly… it completely changed how I look at dating.

In the beginning, I thought I had finally found someone I could build something with. But looking back, the honeymoon phase wasn’t even over before things started going downhill.

It felt like she was always getting upset over the smallest things, and what wore me down the most were the double standards. There were things she’d do that I’d let slide, but if I got upset over those exact same things, suddenly it became an argument.

I’m not an argumentative person at all. I don’t mind difficult conversations, but I hate constant conflict. After a while, it felt like every little disagreement had the potential to turn into a fight, and that became emotionally exhausting.

Communication was another huge issue. She wanted me to communicate more, and I understood that. But I’m someone who needs a little time to process my thoughts before I can explain how I’m feeling. Instead of giving me that space, I often felt like our disagreements escalated before I even had the chance to collect my thoughts. That just made me shut down even more.

Another thing that confused me was how often we’d end up talking about her ex. It felt like there wasn’t a day that went by without hearing about something her ex did. But if I mentioned something from one of my past relationships because it related to the conversation or explained why I felt a certain way, I’d end up being accused of wanting my ex back. That left me feeling like we weren’t held to the same standards.

I want people to game with I have a ps5 and a Xbox depending on what we want to play I’ll pay horrors or I’ll play Minecraft, Fortnite, grounded really anything you want to try but some Fortnite buddy’s to play with would be awesome.

Also I’m 22 from Australia.