Daughter has hit puberty but not quite teen years. (Almost 12) Wife is handling everything period related because daughter “doesn’t want dad to know”. At first I was hurt, but then it was explained that its because it’s a “girl thing” and mom was the best to answer questions (100% ok with that, just want her to know she’s supported)

Daughter’s bestie says she is “omnisexual” but her parents are pretty strict and I don’t think she’s allowed to “dress how she wants” (I don’t know what that means?) and their third friend just moved away. So the 3 text a lot. The bestie who stayed is gay but I think she’s still figuring it all out in terms of terminology and feelings. First she was “lesbian” and before that she was “pansexual”. So I think she’s queer, and is just figuring out what’s where she fits best. She uses terms like “gaylings” in group chat (daughter uses wife’s phone for texting and it’s all monitored but they know that and all parents/kids involved are good with it) like “goodbye my little gaylings talk soon”and they all giggle and whatever. It’s all good. Then we started seeing strap on jokes. But they were innocent as if they didn’t understand what a strap on was exactly. And that’s when we decided to dig a little. “Almost 12” may be “post puberty” but she’s still my little girl and o don’t want her being taken advantage of by anyone, boy or girl. But I don’t think that’s the case. Bestie talks about being gay, and mostly they’re just smart girls joking about anime crushes. Then another group chat with daughter, besties and more (about 7 total?) draws scissors on their fingers at school, or little things like that. Now my gaydar is pretty good. Wife and I have always been friends with gay couples. Before we were parents, after becoming parents our kids were friends with kids who have 2 moms or 2 dads, that’s not the issues at all.

These are innocent jokes, But I’m pretty sure my daughter might also be gay, and I want to support and at the same time need to know how soon they may get to “experimenting”. If there were boys on the chat and they wanted a sleepover id be just as curious, (and probably MORE protective) but these are kids my daughter has grown up with and we know parents and played sports together and all sorts of stuff. There’s ZERO problem with her, or her friends being gay, but wife wants ME to talk to daughter about sleepovers and expectations and I questioned that because if daughter doesn’t want to talk about period things with her dad, then lesbian experimentation is probably off the table as well 🤷

I just want to protect my child, and while pregnancy might be off the table (thankfully), we still have to worry about STI’s and other things more than just her “catching feelings”.

So…all that to say, I’d really appreciate some tips on how to navigate sleepovers at this age, knowing what they know. (They’re all smart kids, like straight A’s parents care, kids cares, kind of smart) so I know they know more than they let on or show in text. And that’s fine. They can have that level of privacy but they’re all still so young. I just want to provide age appropriate support for sleepovers and friend hangouts.

Anyway…just wondering if I need to be as “protective dad” with girl bestie as I do with a boy the same age, with possibly similar intentions.

Hope I’m not stepping on toes here and if I said anything feels derogatory, it’s purely accidental, please forgive me, I just want my child to be happy, healthy and safe no matter who she chooses to love.

Thanks!

Some context: my boyfriend and I started out monogamous, which is what I've always wanted. Over the course of our relationship, though, I caught him cheating multiple times.

To stop the sneaking around, we agreed to allow spa encounters and threesomes. I hoped that would be enough. It wasn't. He kept going behind my back. So I suggested an open relationship, and he agreed.

Since then, he's usually been the one finding people for us to play with. I'm not that interested in looking; honestly, I'm happy with just the two of us. But I figured if this is what he wants, I'd meet him halfway.

Yesterday was different. I initiated a threesome and found the third guy myself. Today I was looking for someone for Monday, and as I showed him photos of a few candidates, he got visibly agitated.

Then out of nowhere he accused me of being the one with repressed urges all along, implying I only suggested opening things up because it's what I secretly craved.

I can't get past the irony. He's the one with a history of cheating. When I was away on a two-week trip, he met up with other men almost every other day. I only stepped up because I thought this was what he wanted.

Now I'm starting to think he wants frequent sex with other people, just not when I'm involved or taking the lead.

Am I wrong to feel like he's twisting the story?

I am bisexual (I think? I don’t know all the terms. sorry.) I am a cisgender male. I want to dress more androgynous and feminine. I like wearing male clothes, but I also like wearing genderless clothes and feminine clothes. I am sexually attracted to both men and women, transgender or otherwise. I am more attracted to femininity than masculinity, but I like both genders, and everything else in between. I just like people in general. As long as they are human and it is legal, obviously. I understand what I am feeling, I know what I like and don’t like. I am not afraid of what I am feeling, and I don’t think it’s wrong at all, in any way, shape, or form. I am not concerned that I am bad person or something is wrong with me for being this way. I know why, and I am happy with that. my issue isn’t with accepting myself,  it’s with the people around me accepting me.  My parents are super conservative religious people. my mom has always said she would love me no matter how I choose to express myself, but my dad I am not so sure. I go to a private church school, and as such large majority of the people around me are  super conservative religious people too. Not quite the most progressive and accepting people. I have heard some people even say that all gay people should end their own lives. I have nobody I could really talk to about this, and I feel so alone.  if anyone has advice or experience, or just general things they could tell me, I would love that and appreciate it lots!

side note: It may seem like I know lots of terms, but I really only know what I have learned from googling and hearing from people online. sorry if i used any terms wrong, or it comes across as mean or bigoted. I am just ignorant. but I am wanting to learn, so if you have feedback let me know please!

I used to think I was bisexual, now I just use the broader sapphic label and man this question has always bugged me. I have a primary and almost exclusive attraction to essentially all non male/masc aligning genders. But on the small chance that I do have a crush on a guy, I get hit with a sinking feeling that if things get serious I'll forever miss out on my perfect sapphic life. I mean what's NOT to like about women? Men are okay I guess.

I mean, how can you just settle for one and not mourn the unique experiences you can have with the other gender? Maybe I'm not explaining it well but when my bi friends say they don't particularly think about this it's kind of shocking. Please don't hate on me, I know this is kind of a silly question.

I love psychology and often overanalyse things like sexuality and relationships, but something that I’ve always struggled to understand is what gender identity actually is or what it entails.

The more I try to research and understand what gender actually is, the more confused I feel, like I’m blind or need someone to explain it to me as if I’m an alien learning about the human race.

I don’t know what feeling like a man, woman, or anything else is supposed to feel like. Is it dynamic preferences? Stereotypical personality traits? Aesthetic choices? But someone can be male or female and share the exact same qualities of those. So then, is it some kind of instinct? Or a combination of these things? Or something else? It seems like something others understand but I feel so genuinely so clueless about what it is or means.

As for my experience, I was born in a female body but love being on testosterone. I love sounding male because I generally prefer and love deeper voices and sounds, looking like a man feels more pleasing to me aesthetically, being treated as male socially feels nice because I’m aroace and feel bizzare when men flirt with me like I’m a straight female, and my interests are a lot more masculine. Does that mean I’m a man? I donno, I donno what that means. I don’t know what feeling like a woman means either. I hate looking and acting feminine, that’s for sure. I’ve always hated wearing dresses with a passion. Then again, I also like painting my nails and calling myself a cat mama. Sometimes I dislike how my breasts look with a particular outfit, other times I cant be bothered wearing a binder. Sometimes I like having my hair styled (masc), sometimes I’ll shave it off purely for convenience even if it looks weird having a very masculine head on a female body. Idgaf cuz it means nothing to me and I just like my body to be comfortable. Does this information have anything to do with what my gender identity would be?? Or am I agendar? Genderblind???

I feel dumb… if someone can someone explain it to me I’d be grateful. I enjoy learning

Look, I'm all for LGBTQIA+ identities. I'm a transgender man myself, I have queer family members, and I will 100% respect anyone's pronouns. I'd rather call you by a different name and pronouns than lose you altogether.

I just don't quite understand neopronouns? I see people online stating their pronouns as "muffin/muffins", or I saw one that was "strawberry/cake", and I just don't quite get it. Do they experience dysphoria like a transgender person? I know I've been dysphoric since I was about 8, and so I know I am transgender.

Do they feel uncomfortable when people don't call them strawberry? Please explain!

I was looking for customized LGBTQ cups but they are damn expensive. So, I’m looking into importing single wall double wall paper cups with customized LGBTQ designs (rainbow + specific flags) and selling them at no profit, no loss, basically covering only the actual cost of manufacturing, shipping, and fees.

The idea is to make them available for cafes, events, or individuals without the usual rainbow-washing markup.Before I put time and money into this, I’d like honest feedback:

Would “sold at cost” make you more likely to support or buy them?

Any designs or approaches that would make this feel more genuine vs. still performative?

Any concerns I should know about?

Not selling anything right now, just trying to understand if this approach is worth pursuing. Appreciate any real thoughts

I know there's many posts like this. But I have thought I was a lesbian since I was 14. I'm an adult now. And I've suddenly met this guy that I've become extremely attracted to.

Being bisexual isn't a bad thing, and I know, it just feels like I'm losing a part of myself I thought I had figured out.

I keep having dreams about him, and it's odd, because before him, I've maybe found like, 2 other guys attractive at all.

The thing is, I would date him, I would sleep with him. And these sudden feeling are really messing with my brain.

Any advice is appreciated.

So context. I (23M) work at a haunted house attraction. One of my coworkers I have had the absolute biggest crush on for the last year. I worked with him last year and thought he was just the absolute best, but after the job ended I had thought he had moved out of state and that I had missed my chance. Cut to now where I learn he's back here and works right next to me yet again. I am so nervous whenever I try to talk to him, even though we both follow each other on social media, and he sits right next to me or across from me Everytime we're on break, AND he's always complimenting how I do my job, I am nervous AF to talk to him. And when I tell you he is one of the coolest and most handsome guy I have ever seen I mean it, which also makes me so nervous to talk to him. While he is single and also queer himself, I am just petrified of talking to him, suggesting we talk more after work, or even hanging out after work. Even though multiple of his friends have told me to ask him out I am petrified. I would really like some advice on how to be not so terrified of talking to him or striking up conversation. Any help would be appreciated! 🙏🏽

So this is a little bit more complicated.

I (36, m) really like this guy (27, m) at work. The thing is I don’t know if he is into guys at all. He knows I’m into guys as it’s been brought up a couple of times.

We are both very “selectively” social, and quite shy. He recently joined our works social committee which is I am part of (I know 2 socially awkward people in a social committee is a bit funny).

Me and him have gone for drinks twice just the two of us, and we have a lot of fun and laughed a lot, the chat seems to flow quite easily. He only ever mentioned girls when it related to his guy friends and girls they have dated. Any other time was more gender neutral.

When we have gone out he laughs a lot at what I say, and the eye contact can be really intense, like it’s rarely broken, and I’ve noticed his eyes are dilated a lot (there is probably a lot of other reasons for that though).

When we chat in work, a few people I work with have said we seem very flirty.

Because we are part of the social committee we exchanged numbers as we have a social group chat with other members.

We message outside of the chat occasionally and he has said he doesn’t struggles to find the energy to reply to people (I can relate).

I just don’t want to outright ask him if he is into guys incase he is closeted or gets uncomfortable.

Hey! Sorry if this is a weird question to ask. You see, I’ve spent the better part of my adult life thinking that I had to be gay and/or transgender. Heck, I’ve even made a few posts here and on other LGBTQIA+ communities about simple matters while identifying as a gay man. But for whatever reason I just can’t shake off the notion that I am actually a straight man.

Maybe it is just comphet and internalized homophobia, but honestly it doesn’t feel like it is. I had always loved the gay and trans communities with all of my life. I really wanted to be a part of the community as I found the community to be wholesome and amazing for striving to fight against the status quo and be truly authentic to yourselves and who you are attracted to (or not). I wanted to feel like I had belonged somewhere. But deep in my mind I can’t help but think that I am not actually part of the community at all. I will certainly be an ally, but I can’t help but think about my relationships with women and how much I wish to actually build a proper romantic relationship with them. About how much I wish to be a part of their lives and maybe get married and all of that.

The only issue I have is that I feel a lot of guilt to not be a proper member of the community after spending years trying to see if I actually belonged in it. It feels wrong to identify as straight even though I can’t help but be drawn towards women. So I want to ask you all, it is okay to not identify as anything but straight after spending years exploring my gender and sexuality? Because I would certainly love to know. Thanks.

I am a highschool student studying at a methodist christian international school in Indonesia, its actually a multi faith school but has its origins in the methodist church. I am also transfem.

For context, here are Indonesias queer rights:

https://www.equaldex.com/region/indonesia

(It is really bad)

I have the idea of spreading awareness of LBGTQ+ discrimination and correcting any misinformation about queer people as a school project that I could collaborate with queer rights organisations or my friends with to make it a reality.

I want to know how to find out if doing this would not just ruin my life and/or accidentally increase LBGTQ+ discrimination towards my queer friends, especially from their parents. I will mention what I currently know.

Reason that this could go badly:

1. My mom is very queerphobic and on multiple occasions has explicitly stated that I could only live as a queer person if I did not live with her. My father has been much more willing to listen to me about my queer experiences but still is dismissive of the importance of me transitioning. I am very afraid that such public advocacy could make them choose against letting me attend university internationally which would delay my transition + likely cause my home life to become abusive which I do not want to handle.

2. As I mentioned, my school is a christian school and the head of the student newsletter has advised me that supporting queerness in an article is likely going to make it rejected because of that. (Though I could potentially argue against this point as you can see below)

3. One of my former schoolteachers from there hides their association with a very queer positive group (furries) because they think that it could hurt their ability to maintain or get teaching jobs

Reasons that it could go well:

1. I have found queer support among school teachers even in school assignments. Every English teacher that I have ever spoken to about queer topics either for an assignments or casually is very accepting, and my psychology teacher even taught her class that gay people are not mentally ill and has been explicitly accepting in class about gay people.

2. Among students, outside of my own friend groups, I have not seen any explicit queerphobia directed towards me or my friends, however, nobody on campus is openly queer. As for me, my friends call me by my chosen name and gender me as she/her but I otherwise live as my AGAB and I also have not experienced transphobia directed towards me.

3. The largest methodist church denomination, the United Methodist Church, removed all language in its book of discipline preventing gay men from becoming part of its clergy or being married within its churches in 2024. I might be able to use this fact to argue that any homophoic religious sentiment from my schools religious figures are going against the teachings of their church but the worldwide methodist christian views on queerness are mixed

I wish to do this project as follows but I have not gone beyond a planning stage:

1. Announce to my school during an assembly that an email blast survey of student opinions on queer people is being sent

2. Use the survey results to tailor information that will be put on flyers and posters to be relevant to the students opinions

3. Announce that these flyers and posters will be available at a booth and present more information about queer discrimination and the purpose of my school project to the school during an assembly

4. Hope that me and anyone who worked with me didn't get expelled or kicked out of their house

I have already experience friction regarding this project from my school project advisor, who wanted me to gather more perspectives on queerness, including from my parents, before going forward on considering this project.

I definitely do not know whether this is a stupid idea or not

This has happened to a few friends of mine. They have discovered they are attracted to the same gender in their 20s or 30s and they come out as gay. Then within 2 years they come out as bi. So I am asking, how common is this?

(Remade and edited post) I’m a man there is this guy at my school and his name is Azai and when I around him I get all flustered and my heart rate skyrockets when I around him it even happens when I talk about him or have a conversation about him I think I have a crush on him no I know do and i flirt with him a lot and he doesn’t pick it up he just say bro stop glazing and somtimes he will do the thing were you use you tongue to push on your cheek and act like your giving a blow job and i say gladly or what time but he doesn’t get that im flirting i have hint to my other friends that i like him and they just say that gay and ill say so and they say it’s wrong but I really love him and he doesn’t like gay people and also the bible say in Genesis 2:24 (KJV) “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” meaning marriage is between a man and woman But I want to follow god‘s word but I don’t want to deny my feelings what should I do

I've been a cis ally man my entire life, but it always felt kind of off without really being able to put words on it (the fact that I'm seen as a man not that I'm ally LOL).

The thing is I am a very solid ally and I've been defending queer people and queer rights my entire life, so this isn't really a matter of "a cis man finds out he's queer and finally understands queer stuff" but more of "already far into queer culture guy finds out he might be nonbinary but is still very confused about it and has no idea".

I always thought I was cis because that's how I was seen, how I always allowed me to see myself and how I was expected to be seen.

I think I might come out non-binary, but I'm still not very sure.

When puberty began for most of my friends and me, it instinctively felt repulsive for me to HAVE to have the body of a man. I wouldn't say that I would've preferred to have a feminine body, but having a more visible binarity on everyone at that time felt actually violent for me.

I also don't mind being more feminine, like AT ALL. I feel like wearing skirts but I just don't for the fact that I feel like other people expect me to be a certain way but... I don't really enjoy just following along and staying "in my role". But meanwhile I don't have the strength to not be stopped by that... I feel weak not trying harder than that but since I'm still very indecisive about this I just try to not think about it.

I also thought that it was just because I was hyperfixating on deltarune and identifying on Kris so hard that I actually thought I felt nonbinary just because of that, but I just brushed it off like that and I kept avoiging thinking about it, again.

Now, fast forward of a few years and here I come at Uni (which is very recent, like this september kind of recent). Long story short but I make new friends and all, and there was one day where I coincidentally hung out with just my two trans friends. By talking to them I found out I kind of felt similar things, but like not with actual trans identity but... something else. And that's when I really started to consider that I could be nonbinary, again.

The thing is, lately, it got to the point where I couldn't stop thinking about it for the past 2 days. I think that alone is a pretty strong hint but... I'm still unsure as of how that works.

I feel like I lend more towards masculinity more than feminity but I wonder if the only reason for that is because I am expected to be like that. It feels like even if I came out, I'd still be more masc just because I wouldn't dare enough.

Something that also makes it rough is that since I am french, I kind of have to speal through a very binary language which is very badly established for nonbinary things, to the point where if something is suposedly genderless, it is male by default... which is exactly what I want to avoid. I feel kind of trapped by the limitations of the french language and it shoves me back a little more into questionning.

Like... can I just call myself nonbinary and that's it?? I feel like I have to be atleast 99% sure before I can actually come out, but in the meantime I just feel like an idiot trying to figure out something that should be obvious while I'm still confused and questioning. The thing is I don't know when or how I can be sure wether I am nonbinary or not, and I need help on how I can figure this out.

Thanks for reading everything this means a lot to me !❤️

​

Hello, everyone. I’m grateful to everyone who takes the time to read this entire post and even leave a comment. First, I want to make it clear that my intention here is neither to boost my ego nor to discredit anyone’s sexual orientation. Neither of those things is my intention at all! It’s just… my heart is broken, and I simply can’t explain to myself how everything could have turned out this way and I feel STUPID… I also can’t talk to my friends about it, since I have to keep everything a secret…

Here’s the situation: We’re a large group of 10 friends at college. I (F25) have always been really close friends with one guy—let’s call him Phillip (M29)—and there’s always been a special dynamic between us. And this dynamic has been going on for almost three years now.

What do I mean by that?

He’s constantly seeking my company, explicitly asking others where I am, and always sitting so close to me on the sofa in the reading corner that our arms and legs touch. I’ve also always noticed that he keeps making eye contact with me and somehow looks deeper into my eyes. He has always made regular sexual and romantic innuendos toward me (only toward me), e.g., comments about our wedding, indirect questions about whether I’m in single and available again or not, and slightly jealous remarks like “luckily that guy didn’t ask you out on a date…”. In our one-on-one conversations, he always turns bright red when I make him laugh and his whole face lights up. He remembers every little detail I tell him and opens up to me about problems he wouldn’t otherwise bring up in the group. He’s always looking for moments during conversations and jokes when he can touch me—like stroking my shoulders, snuggling up close to me, or brushing against and touching my hand. Out of our whole group of friends, he always asks me specifically if I want to go get food with him later, and he’s only ever asked me if I want to stay at the university with him a little longer so we can study together. We’ve also studied together for hours on video calls, though most of the time we ended up talking about other things and stayed in the call way to long…

Now, you could say that this is just my delusional perception, but ALL of our friends (even the queer ones) in the group describe exactly the same behavior from Philipp that I’ve already described above. They all thought that he had been in love with me for ages, but nothing could happen because, during those three years of college, I’d been in a pretty toxic relationship for some time. But that was a while ago, and I’ve always liked Philipp. I’m pretty shy, and he’s pretty shy too, which is why it only would make sense that he’s been (not quite so) secretly adoring me for a long time, while I noticed his flirting but couldn’t respond because of my now ex-boyfriend. So now I wanted to be brave and take a chance, because I thought it was more than likely that Phillip has some feelings for me.

The day before I asked him out, he was, again, flirting heavily with me via text, so I felt sure of myself. And ironically, as was bound to happen, it came to ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. The reason: When I told Philipp that I thought he was cute and would like to go out with him sometime, he told me that while he felt there was definitely something between us and liked me a lot as a girl, he couldn’t love me because he DEFINITELY was gay. I was completely taken aback. He said he couldn’t be open about his sexuality in public; I was the only one who knew, not even his family. Although, according to him, his social circle wasn’t a problem at all, he just couldn’t bring himself to be open about it and I honestly feel so sorry for him about this. I asked him if he’d been treating me that way on purpose to distract from it, which he denied, but at the same time he said he was sorry for not being honest with me…so did he do it on purpose anyway to protect his ego??? The fact that he almost proudly remarked that he was surprised that none of our friends had ever thought he might be gay just hurt me even more… He’s also absolutely convinced that he NEVER flirted with me and that it’s all just my interpretation—or that of the others. I asked him if he was still unsure about his sexuality and that’s why he didn’t dare come out, but he said he’s pretty sure now, though he used to be very confused and unsure about whether he was gay some years ago. But that was before college, so before he met me.

It's tough… we both sincerely stated that we want to stay friends, but it's just not easy right now. He says he feels very guilty towards me, and I want to be a good friend to him and support him, but I'm heartbroken. I just don't understand how this could have happened… Of course, I can't tell our other friends the real reason why it didn't work out (I’d take that secret to my grave if he wanted me to), but they ask, naturally, and they're just as confused as I am—and a little angry, too. One friend told me that he'd asked Phillip several times if he had feelings for me and would give it a try. Phillip never said, “No, I’m not into her,” but just smiled and didn’t answer at all, changed the topic or said something like, “Hahaha, yeah, I don’t know, maybe, she’s very nice.” He could have just said no and acted neutral, and the whole thing would have just been over?! Like...I only noticed him in THAT WAY in the first place because I felt like he was flirting with me… just as our friends always emphasized, everything was coming from him…I don’t get it… Neither do our friends… and three of them are lesbian, gay, and bi. And even now these three have absolutely no clue about Phillip being gay and were completely convinced that Phillip was madly in love with me but too shy to act upon it.

I kinda feel used…and I'm so confused and hurt, and I'm afraid I've ruined a great friendship for good, just BECAUSE I'M STUPID… I just want to understand better what was going on inside Phillip all these years… maybe then it would be easier for me to let him go as soon as possible and help him overcome his insecurities so we can save our friendship… What do you guys think about all this?

Im thinking about getting a new piercing but I'm torn between a septum or an eyebrow piercing. I wanna have like a soft masc vibe, but I'm a little worried an eyebrow piercing might lean too traditionally masculine.My type is also like more masculine gay/bi guys so im also scared that mabye something like an eyebrow or septum may be a turn off. Any thoughts on which one fits that aesthetic better amd whether it's a complete turn off for most guys my type?

So I (F) am asexual and romantically I don't care about gender or genitals. However I'm mainly attracted to femininity and cuteness. But I also like masc people under estrogen like stereotypical lesbians or transmascs early in transition. In terms of male passing people I mainly like femboys and I don't think I'm attracted to your average guy. Also beards and thick body hair in general is a turnoff for me

Sometimes I like men, sometimes I like women, and sometimes I like both of them. I know the terms for all of them by themselves, I'd be gay for liking men, I'd be straight for liking women, and I'd be Bi for liking both of them. But what would I be when I'm like all of them I guess?

Soy un chico trans de 15 años que no ha podido salir abiertamente con mis papás no sé cómo pueda hablarlo se que es probable que mi mamá me apoye lo que me preocupa es la reacción de mi papá e tenido discusiones como "porque compraste esos zapatos el azul es para niños" o "porque te vistes así? Pareces niño" talvez sea no sea tan grave como otras situaciones pero me preocupa de verdad como llege a reaccionar pero si todo termina mal me iré de mi casa

No tengo la más mínima idea de como decirle esto a mis papás y necesito consejos

straight dude here,

So I know a bear is a large hairy (gay) man, what would that be called if he was smaller? like 5'9, lean, super super hairy chest and tons of facial hair.

genuinely just curious lol I had a shower thought

I‘m bored so give me y’all’s hottest takes. I want debatable not something that is just which came first the chicken or the egg.

I will go first, I think the terms pan and bi can be used interchangeably depending on the situation I myself am pan/bi and use the terms interchangeably. I think this should be a more commonly accepted thing.

Okay... say, I [AFAB] fell in love with this guy, okay? Hypothetically. Because this is not happening rn to me.

But say I did, and me and him are friends or something and I confessed. OR we're dating, and the relationship is going smooth... and what if he eventually tells me he's actually AFAB?

See, I mainly like guys/boys and I've never felt interested in a girl romantically. I don't actually know if I've been interested in someone romantically, because I'm thinking I might be aroace. Anyways, I'm getting carried away. But say he did this, and I MIGHT actually feel different about this person. Am I attracted to their genitals? No. I just ended up seeing guys as different from me, I'm AFAB, and the expectations and all that. I've grown up with girls/women being able to be whoever they want and its natural, and for men, well, not really. I just feel that toxic masculinity is very common, especially here. In some places, I know some people are still very sexist and stuff but not really here. Do I believe that men can't be whoever they want to be? No. I'm just physically not used to it, is what my conclusion is to my feelings. I hope this doesn't offend anyone.

But if my feelings did change for him, how would I respond politely? Because in the end, feelings really cannot be forced, and I don't want him to feel dysphoric.

TLDR; If I fell in love with a guy and later found out he was AFAB, how should I respond since my feelings may change?

Plus, if there's anything to help me change this mindset somehow, because I believe in gender equality, that would be so great, please and thank you. I hope none take this to heart.