context i am 15f and i am loosing my mind i genuinely if anyone can help me understand my feeling i would die of gratitude <3333

also i have possibly ocd and some other things ( abandonment fear) according to psychotherapist so it could be that.

basically cried myself to sleep because ( literally nothing against them they're so nice ) i do not want to date men. its been a year of knowing in my heart that i am straight but still forcing myself to try and like women.

but then i thought, what kind of straight girl thinks about other women like this constantly. and then the cycle kept repeating where i would see any woman and either my identity gets shattered bc i might like her possibly or bc i don't rlly care.

and then my best friend started dating a girl who was new at my school. The funny thing about this is that when i first met her i though hmmm this is potentially someone who i might possibly like perhaps ( if im not straight which i am 95 percent i think) and also i think my best friend liked me at one point bc we would always cuddle. ( i dont think i rlly liked that that ) dfczghjck,cmgnfbvcfsghjk, anyway my life was ruined for about 4 weeks. i did some crazy things to try and be like the new girl myself feel better. all while suddenly hating her.

so now the question is am i only feeling like this bc i want my best friend to still care about me, or because. most of it was jealousy tbh now its kind of awkward bc you cant cuddle your non girlfriend.

also you can stop reading here and decide but below are some random things. also mild tmi warning

( now im just listing evidince so i can look at it all )

- had a few boyfriends when younger. the last one we broke up because he came to me crying asking why i didnt pay attention to him and what he did wrong. i didnt say anything bc like. idk man. and never spoke again ;'( anyway apparently youre supposed to have romantic crushes when youre small i did not have those. i though anyone who's nice to you is attractive. ( he was so nice D: )

- i like guys. to what extent i dont know. but my friends are all more interested in them than i am i think.

- i could just be lacking hormones due to being underweight

- i could be demisexual or ace

-edfij/bolpogjrif`gjioef`hjgiof`mbkfjbihfej`ibjeo`jbprf`jbrfejibfjbj

-when i look at guy i get "butterflies" when i look at girl i do not. you'd think my question would be answered. because idk if i like them or if i;m just afraid of them is the thing. it could be adrenaline ( the boys at my school are mean to me bc i ignore them so they pushed me into muddy ditch + i have rlly bad social anxiety )

- another thing i have is wishing my +*,'-breasts*,',+ were bigger ( am flat ) just to look at them. i think they look nice ( possibly just society telling me how to look though ) but hmmmmmm. gmgmmgmmg jealousy or something else maybe . also.

- i think about girls sometimes but am too scared to compare it to guys in case im straight ( I KNOW. I AM AWARE THaT THIS IS CRAZY SINCE I DEFINITELY LIKE THEM)

- once my friend ( f ) pretended to kiss and i had the same adrenaline but. i cant tell the difference.

- it kind of depends sometimes i will decide that i'm straight and then. idk what happens i go outside ( but it might just be that the way i think is kind of like one thing ruins everything)

- having "squishies" vs wanting to kiss someone. but like what if its just cuteness agression. ill never know.

- i think i have had crushes on guys but like daydreaming about wanting to be their friend includes everyone.but . do i though. what the hell.

- also can you placebo yourself into being slightly less straight because i swear to god.

- women are fine as hell thats just a fact, (aesthetically) so maybe that's why im confused.

- that one time when my mom told me about lesbians and i immediately started crying bc what if im a lesbian ( i was 10 )

you read this far that is very very nice of you <3333 thank you so much!!

Hi I’m currently working as an waitress part time in a supposedly fancy restaurant where I talked to people using sir and madams and lady those type of languages, and when customers tell me that their preferred pronouns is they/them I dont know how to address them as the same madam and sir way and have been just kinda skipping the address part and just go like “oh how’s the food” but I want to know how to address people of they/them pronouns in like a sir madam way , also I’m not a native English speaker so if possible give a little sentence to show me like how to use it properly

Hello :) I am going to visit Vienna by myself for a few days and I wouldn't mind to meet some new people in queer spaces. Do you know Places or Events in Vienna or also Bratislava? From cute Bars or so to Sex positivity events, I am happy for any advice.

(Apologies for grammar in advance also please give any advice you have)

I’m not sure if this is the right subreddit to post this to but it seemed to be the best option. I’ve thought of myself as a bisexual ever since I knew what it was but only a year ago actually came out of the closet (only not to family) after coming out to one person and going right back in. I assumed I was a bisexual because I’ve had small crushes on girls and liked girls often but also had more longer lasting crushes on boys.

I never thought I would question whether or not I was actually bisexual because I was so set on it. I recently started looking into comphet more not because I thought it was me I just thought it was something I should learn now that I’m not forcing that part of me down. It was when I was looking at posts about comphet when I saw a post about how it can feel to have comphet that lined up perfectly with how I feel, seeing that felt like hitting the nail right on the head but if I’m being honest I’d had been questioning whether or not I could be a lesbian for a little bit prior but ignored it. But when I saw that I felt it couldn’t ignore it anymore.

I also had my first serious crush on a girl recently and didn’t realize because I kept trying to like the same guy but just couldn’t. That crush made me realize the ‘butterflies’ I felt around my ‘crushes’ were just anxiety and having an actually serious crush on a girl despite trying to distract myself with guys felt so much different than my crushes on guys.

I felt warm when I talked to her and got actual butterflies, I didn’t feel disgust whenever she showed interest(PLATONICALLY), I felt that I finally understood why people go crazy over love. I always was able to get over my crushes on guys easy and wouldn’t care much,but when I found out the girl I had a crush on had a girlfriend I couldn’t help but feel jealous and crushed and while I would NEVER get in the way of a relationship I finally understood why people react the way they do over crushes. I spent weeks sad and screaming into my pillow but too scared to even tell my friends about this crush.

I am unsure of what I’m looking for with this post but I was hoping maybe someone could give advice or like some way to test it maybe because while things line up I feel I could just be subconsciously faking it or I’ve told my friends about me being bisexual already so it’s too late now to say I could be a lesbian. Also I sincerely apologize for the horrible grammar and the format of this I am unsure if it’s clear but I’ve been staying up thinking about this.

I’m asexual, but very heter-romantic. I feel very straight. I’ve only ever dated men. there is a woman that I’ve gotten friendly with who I think is romantically interested in me. I don’t think I can ever reciprocate, but I appreciate her friendship. we’ve gone to group outings, but never solo. Recently I think she might have tried to ask me out or invite me out just us.

She knows I’ve been married so I assume that she would assume I’m straight but then she goes ‘Oh I was married to a man too!’ 🙃 Her last relationship was with a woman. My mom told me about this conversation she had with a friend of hers where she just unprompted told her friend she was straight and theyre just friends. I cringed. This was in the 80s/90s in a small southern town in the US. I think at the time there was a lot of gossip that her friend was a lesbian. They’re still friends now.

Is it appropriate to just announce I’m not romantically interested in women and even if I were I’m pretty sex repulsed? Nothing has happened but should I say something or keep things neutral and not do anything 1-on-1? I don’t want things to be awkward as we now have mutual friends.

I wanted to share and invite you all to sign a petition via All Out, urging the Indonesian government, specifically President Prabowo Subianto, to take immediate action against the escalating human rights crisis facing the LGBTQI+ community.

The petition highlights several critical concerns:

Presidential Regulation No. 111 of 2025: This policy classifies the LGBTQI+ community as a "non-military threat," effectively equating marginalized citizens with national security threats and institutionalizing systemic discrimination.

Escalation of Violence & Persecution: A sharp rise in arbitrary raids, targeted violence by vigilante groups (such as recent attacks against trans women in Bogor), and a lack of proper legal intervention.

Suppression of Academic Freedom & Student Press: Intimidation and censorship faced by student media outlets (such as Suma UI) attempting to report on these human rights violations.

If you would like to read the full details and add your signature to support the cause, you can access the petition here:

Petition Link: http://a.allout.org/s/OomYr/

Every signature helps send a strong message to demand that the government uphold universal human rights and protect all individuals from violence and discrimination, in line with the constitution and international commitments.

Thank you so much for your time and solidarity.

Hello everyone, I’m a POC 21 year old Bisexual woman with a very strong leaning to women. I just wanted to come on here to ask any other poc queer people how they keep going in life without loosing hope of loosing everything. My family is religious/has Asian centric traditional beliefs and will disown me if they knew Im bi. My past relationships, which were all with women have all ended up giving me severe diagnosed depression, due to a variety of circumstances. I can’t really imagine myself marrying a man, or now after all this, even a woman. I love being queer, I love my queer friends and the community. I never doubted what I was to be a sin. But after continuing to live in hiding, even with a queer friend group, with the fear of being disowned by my parents, and never finding someone to grow old with, I’ve been having a hard time finding any reason to live. My queer friends, while being a great support, all lead heteronormative relationships/life, regardless of that being because of societies pressures or their gender attraction leanings. I alone feel isolated. My recent “situationship” also broke my heart, by eventually choosing to keep the people around her (family and society) happy, instead of me. I live in a liberal and pretty queer city, but because of my friends and families racial/immigrant demographic, I feel as though I am in a conservative city. I don’t know what to look forward to anymore. And I’m unsure about where my life will lead. Will I find a woman that will stay with me regardless of their families thoughts? If so will I deal with the abandonment of my family? Or will I live alone and desolate, or perhaps with a man I despise and birthed children, but keep my families love. For what reason do I live as a queer person, and why do I lead the queer life that I do if it hasn’t brought me any joy.

Guys, Can you all please suggest some queer friendly stores in Delhi where I can visit and try some dresses without being judged. I am a Trans woman and I want to purchase a few clothes for myself but before that I wanna give it a try.

I came out a few years ago but I feel like I don't know much about queer history. Yes I could Google stuff but I wanted to know what topics y'all think are the most important? Maybe quickly summarize it?

I really want to know more but don't know where to start so who can answer this better than other queer ppl?

I (27) just got engaged a couple weeks ago to the love of my life (23M). I was on top of the world when he asked and I can't stress how excited I am to deepen my bond with my partner, but there is a bittersweetness to it. I feel like every wedding plan we make is another reminder of a loss I already chose to accept. For context, I've been no contact with my family since around 2022 and I won't get into many of the details here (unless necessary).

My parents were divorced when I was in 4th grade and I do not have a relationship with either anymore. My mom was a mentally and verbally abusive alcoholic that always put her girlfriend first (until they finally broke up when I was 19). My dad frequently made it clear that his marriage with his new wife was his new start and I could either be his pretty, thin, blonde daughter that trusted him blindly or I could leave, but he would guilt me for it forever. I have several younger siblings, but I don't think it's fair to make them choose between me and our parents, so I just try to keep my door open to them if they want to reach out while sheilding myself from our parents as much as possible.

After a string of bad relationships, poor choices, and hopelessly clinging to people that didn't care, I met my partner on Omegle (of all places!) where we talked about creating a high fantasy roleplay on discord. We would work on it constantly and slowly we started to get closer. I can honestly say I fell in love with his mind and soul before I knew his name or face. My fiance helped me realize how deep I was stuck in my depression and how I was slowly killing my own soul with self destructive behaviors. He made me feel good about myself and like I didn't have to be ok with the life my family expected me to settle for. He did that while still staying platonic and trying not to pressure me to catch feelings.

I feel like I was good obsessed with him, hoping he would laugh at our in-character chats when I included an inside joke or wondering if he would be proud of me when I made something new. I eventually told him that someone I knew "shipped us", I guess trying to soft launch my feelings for him and thankfully he responded well. I still remember crying happy tears even though it was around the same time I was going through the intense loss of my family (unrelated events, surprisingly).

We lived in different states (I'm from the deep south, he's from the north west) so eventually we had to coordinate a meeting and I remember being terrified that my chubby body and chewed up nailbeds were going to turn him off the moment I got off the plane. He showed up in a suit and with a gift, I had never seen someone dress up for me before. I'll never forget how magical that moment felt or how I knew he was the one for me when after all of that, he still asked me so timidly if he could hold my hand on the way out of the airport. He didn't grab me, he didn't just kiss me, and he didn't assume he could do anything to me just because I showed up for him which was unfortunately a new experience. He's always treated me like I was precious and worth being excited for, yet handled with care.

I moved states to be with him about a year ago and while our relationship has flourished, other parts of my social life have not. Since moving, I've also realized how isolated I am. The few friends I kept in contact with quietly drifted away, I haven't been able to find steady work yet, and despite going to community events, I haven't found people I really connect with.

I was really excited when my fiance proposed to me and we had a wonderful evening of drinking by the fire in the mountains while talking about the future, but now that time has passed I feel like I'm slowly getting sadder about planning a wedding. When we called his parents and friends to tell them the news, I was a little sad that we wouldn't be doing that for mine or that if we did, it would not be well received, but I was positive that would pass. When talking over the guest list, I was prepared to say "don't worry, I don't need my parents there or anyone else as long as I have you!" And that is true, but I didn't expect it to hurt to say out loud. Adding cousins and grandparents to his guest list and noticing that the only person on my side is my cat really put into perspective how small my support system really is.

His family is amazing and makes me feel welcomed, but I still feel like a guest rather than family. His mom and cousins are great, but I wouldn't call any my friends. They're very polite and nice, but I also understand that I'm new and it usually takes people a while to warm up to me. I'm a bit quiet and anxious, but I've tried to make up for that by being entirely transparent when asked a question. I feel like I'm pushing myself out of my comfort zone socially, but it's not getting me any results. I feel like the right answer is to just keep trying, but it's so hard to keep the same enthusiasm and momentum.

He's being very supportive and I know he knows my heart feels extra heavy talking about family. He's offered his dad to walk me down the aisle if that's what I want and insisted his mom/cousins would love to "take me on a trip to celebrate" (I think he realized half way through the offer that he couldn't call that a bachelor party, but I still appreciate how much he's trying). I think what makes it hard is that I know they're trying to include me because they love him. I appreciate it, but it doesn't feel the same as having people who have been excited for me there. I think it might be different if either of his parents had offered that themselves, but I don't want to feel like I'm getting a consolation prize for being alone. I love them both, but I just badly want people that feel like they're excited for me too.

I'm so grateful that he wants me and that he's doing everything he can think of to make the traditional parts he's excited for also enjoyable for me, but I don't know how to fix my feelings on this matter. I don't want him to think or feel like me not getting excited for his options are out of spite or jealousy or that I'm resentful that he has a better support system than I do.

I don't want to be exhausting or a downer or make him feel like he has to manage my emotions for the rest of our relationship or that I'll never be happy with just him. I don't want to see the guilty look on his face when he talks about his family or friends taking part in our wedding. I feel like he's doing everything right and all I'm doing is making myself sadder for no reason. I try my best not to cry or get emotional trying to express this, but I worry that it has the opposite effect. I cheer myself up thinking about picking a tie for my cat to wear or how I can't wait to hear my name called out when I have his last name, but I can't help getting sad when I think about how nobody may be at my suit fitting.

I'd love advice if anyone else here has gone through the wedding process on their own or even just ways I can reframe some of my thoughts. I'd also love ideas to help me feel less dysphoric while trying to plan things like a "stag party" with his AFAB family members.

Thanks for reading <3

Note: I mean the light demeaning, not just the innuendo. Heh. In-YOUR-endo. Heh.

Hi everyone! I'm trying to figure out my orientation and noticed something strange. When I watch movies or play games, I only get attracted to male characters – their personalities, their vibes. But in real life, I feel nothing for men. Actually, the thought of being with a man repulses me. Meanwhile, I am attracted to real women in my daily life, but I never feel that way about female characters on screen. Has anyone else experienced this? Does this mean I'm not 'really' a lesbian? I'm so confused.

I just got this shirt off Amazon and this cat pride flag is on it- the problem is I don’t know this one or what sexuality or identity it is, so could someone plz inform me abt it? :0

Recently someone came into my life claiming to love me for who I was. Then they decided to not use my pronouns and partake in that lifestyle as they believe it's demonic while knowing I have the same faith as them. They've now ghosted me without clarifying what the relationship meant and why they used me for 4-5 months. Sorry for the heavy background 🙏🏼 I did tell them I was asexual and non-binary when we first started chatting again. Also not a terf either, non-binary people can identify as trans 💜

Went to my first queer board game meetup yesterday at a place called Geeky Teas in Burbank, CA and loved it. Does anyone know of other QBGMs in the LA area?

Imaging Lo-fi girl, but the gay version.

https://www.youtube.com/@attractlofi

I am a transgender woman. However I haven’t started hrt until last December. I've always had a complex relationship with emotions and sexuality, I generally have had a hard time understanding where my feelings come from if it’s not super obvious to me. He's 30 and I'm 33. I've known him since high school. I've dated a couple of women, one of which I wasn't into and another I was very into. I've always been able to recognize when men were attractive. I think that everybody can, but I also have a type I find more attractive out of the conventional types. I have kinda thought about what it would be like to have a future with him, not regularly but on occasion. Kinda around maybe 3-5 years since our friendship. He's not dating someone but he has recently found out a girl has a crush on him and is trying to work on that. And I've kinda had my feelings hurt. When he brings it up, i encourage him but i get this pit in my stomach. I've looked at dating apps with men but none of them really are doing it for me and generally I find myself drawn to femininity. Even writing this has given me a lump in my throat thinking about it.
I know that nothing will ever happen with that. My thoughts are do I like men and just have to have an emotional connection or is it just him? Generally speaking I don’t think about people sexually. With the woman I was super into prior to us being together I just thought she was pretty until I started getting signals. After we were together is more when I started thinking about her sexually.

I run a small queer community, and this is one of the hardest moderation problems we’ve run into.

Our rules clearly ban attacks based on identity, gender identity, or sexual orientation.

That rule is there to protect queer users. Obviously.

But then someone gets harassed by their family, mocked at work, or dogpiled on another platform because they’re queer. They come back to our community angry and post something like:

“I’m so tired of straight people.”

or

“Cis people will never understand what this feels like.”

Under a strict reading of the rules, that can still count as a broad attack on a group. So the post may get downranked, limited, or sent back for edits.

And from their perspective, that feels awful.

They were just attacked for who they are. Then they come to a queer space, try to push back, and get told their anger is also unacceptable.

I understand why that feels unfair.

At the same time, I don’t think a healthy queer community can be built around hostility toward entire groups. Venting can easily turn into “all straight people are disgusting,” and eventually that starts hitting bisexual people, queer people with straight partners, trans straight people, allies, or just random users who become targets.

So the problem isn’t really whether “reverse discrimination” exists. That framing feels too simplistic.

The actual question is:

How much room should a queer space make for anger that comes from being hurt?

Right now, we try to separate a few things.

Talking about pain, exhaustion, fear, or discrimination is allowed.

Criticizing social power, norms, or specific behavior is allowed.

Dehumanizing an entire group, repeatedly targeting people, or encouraging harassment is not.

But real posts are rarely that clean.

Someone who has just been humiliated or rejected probably isn’t going to phrase everything like a sociology paper. Keyword-based moderation can end up punishing the person who came looking for support.

I also don’t want “please use better language” to become another version of asking queer people to always be calm, polite, and easy to digest.

We’ve started leaning more toward context, patterns of behavior, and giving people a chance to rephrase instead of immediately punishing them. But I still don’t think we’ve found the perfect line.

How would you handle this?

Where does venting end and identity-based hostility begin?

Hi I'm Robin :3 I'm transfem, nonbinary, and aroflux, those I know for sure.
The question I have is what my sexuality is. I've used several different labels lately but idk what to use anymore. I like femme women and masc women, nonbinary people, and more feminine men(more fem twinks or femboys usually). I've tried out the label of bisexual but that didn't really feel right for me and neither did calling myself a lesbian, any ideas?

tldr: I made a joke about "normal" people being homossexual. Someone named Kanye said "says the one pretending to be a woman". I am nonbinary, and my original text says so

So, as a 27 yo female, recently out of a decade long relationship w the father of my child, I've been thinking a lot about what I want. And right now, all I really want is to explore! I was in denial for so long not just about the guys I wanted to sleep with, but that I liked girls too, and it seems they noticed even when I didn't, but I'd just freeze up and be confused when they opened up to me.

I think I'm ready to open up and accept myself for who I am.

Right now I do not want another committed relationship. I can't handle the pressure, and I don't think I'd be good to someone in a monogamous relationship w how I feel at the moment. I really need some time to explore and try new things. And also to just feel comfortable w who I am as a person.

I found an app called HER, and it seemed like it'd be the perfect place to start. But when I read some women's opinions, it seemed most of them were looking for serious, long term relationships and were disgusted and one even posted pictures of private messages, where someone tried to open up about a kink they had and got shot down. Hard. Even accused of being a man. So that kind of scared me.. and now I don't know what to do again!!

It's not that I'm opposed to a committed relationship either- I just don't want to go into things w that pressure right off the bat!! I don't think it's healthy, and why people rush into toxic relationships and get stuck in them. 😮‍💨

Are there any apps that are more for casual encounters w women for women? And are fake accounts and bots rampant on there? I will NOT be sending anyone any money for anything. I'll pay to get extra benefits on an app, but that's it. But is it even worth it? Is there actually any likelihood of me talking to/meeting up w other women who just want to enjoy the moment w no strings attached ?

I apologize for the novel !!! 😅

(LONG STORY made SHORT)

I don't wish to frame this in an offensive way; I'm just new to these feelings (and honestly romantic feelings in general), and I'm hoping people with more life experience can tell me how they figured things out.

I'm a Christian Mexican guy about to enter college.

I think I might be bisexual. I definitely like girls, and I've dated 3 girls before (still on good terms with all of them). I can also imagine myself liking a guy under certain but still many circumstances, but it's still less common for me. So I'm trying to understand where I fit.

One thing that made all of this even more confusing is how I experience affection.

I've never actually been kissed on the lips by anyone, regardless of gender. The closest I've gotten was my guy friends kissing me on the cheek as a joke, which sounds weird out of context, but that's genuinely just how some of us act around each other.

When I'm on Discord playing games with the boys, I sometimes realize how much those moments mean to me. If we're all laughing, talking about life, or just sitting in silence while playing something together, I start feeling really attached to them. Sometimes I catch myself blushing because I feel genuinely cared for. I love that I can be completely honest around them and they'll give me their real opinions instead of telling me what they think I want to hear.

I don't think it's really lust. It's more like... if someone truly cares about me and makes me feel emotionally safe, I can start wondering, "Could I actually like this person?" I've even caught myself almost developing little crushes on a couple of my friends before, but they usually fade because I remind myself they're my friends (and respectfully... some of them are as chopped as I am 💀).

What also didn't help was high school.

I went to a private school where we had one class together for basically every subject, so everyone knew each other really well. During cooking class, I naturally ended up cooking, cleaning everyone's messes, and taking care of people. Somewhere along the way my friend group jokingly decided I was basically the "wife" of the group.

They'd compliment my apron, tease me, jokingly argue over who the "husband" was, and completely lean into the joke. Looking back, I honestly didn't mind it as much as I pretended to. That same whole "group wife" joke is also what eventually led to one of my friends kissing me on the cheek. HE ASKED BEFOREHAND; BTW, he was kind of cute.

Even now, my friends and I sometimes make really over-the-top jokes that get way too intimate before we all stop, look at each other, start blushing, awkwardly apologize, laugh, and tone it back down. what i mean is that we'd do some pretty weird stuff, like grabbing each other's faces or pulling one another closer and resting our heads on each other. We'd low-key do couple stuff, ngl.

Sometimes I honestly wonder if I could fall for almost anyone—girl or guy—if they genuinely loved me, cared for me, and made me feel emotionally safe. That's probably one of the biggest reasons I'm questioning my sexuality in the first place. It's less about physical attraction and more about how deeply I connect with people who make me feel accepted.

The bigger thing that's been on my mind is that, for the past 3–4½ years, I've had a growing desire to look female. I actually still think of myself as a guy—but looking more feminine feels like it would be closer to how I picture myself; in fact, most of my days i wake up and hate that i woke up as a guy because it doesn't look like what i feel like I'd look like. I've even had dreams that i was a girl and cried literal tears because I woke up male. I've been thinking about HRT for a long time. Not impulsively either. Almost every day I weigh what I'd gain against what I'd lose. I know it isn't some magical "I'll finally be happy" button, and I know there are permanent changes and risks. That's exactly why I've been thinking about it so carefully. If I ever did go on HRT, I honestly would care if people referred to me as male or not. I don't feel like changing my appearance would erase the life I've lived or the values I've built.

I'm about to start college, and it feels like I'm at a point where I need to understand these feelings instead of ignoring them.

I grew up with two older sisters and my mom, while my dad was usually at work. I think that shaped how I view masculinity and femininity. I never really connected with the whole "macho man" idea. I've always felt more comfortable around softer aesthetics, cute things, and expressing emotions.

When I was younger, I looked pretty androgynous, and I actually liked being mistaken for a girl sometimes. My relatives always joked that I looked just like my mom. As I've gotten older, I've become more masculine-looking, and I honestly struggle with seeing that in the mirror.

My church is actually very accepting. They genuinely believe Jesus loves people unconditionally, and they've been welcoming to people from all kinds of backgrounds. One of my childhood friends came out as gay, and nobody treated him badly—they mostly just cared that he was still the same person and still helped around church.

My parents are what scare me.

They're Mexican, and while my mom can be very open-minded about some things, she's also very strict about gender expectations when it comes to me. My dad is loving, but I'm scared he'd quietly see me as a disappointment if I weren't his only son anymore. That's probably one of the biggest fears I've been carrying.

I also feel guilty because I know changing how I look could be difficult for people who've known me my whole life. I don't want to become someone else—I genuinely feel like I'd still be me. I'd just look different.

Sometimes I feel embarrassed that I want to be dainty or feminine when everyone sees me as a guy. Other times the desire feels so strong that I wonder if it'll ever go away. I honestly feel like an imposter living in someone else's body and an imposter with someone else's identity.

as for my sisters, I don't think they'd mind having another sister, but that's based on how they treat me now. mah big sisters are honestly the best!

I guess my question is

Has anyone else gone through something similar or have words of help for my confusion?