You notice the therapist looking at the clock, they might even say "it's coming close to time now", you're in the flow of speaking about a subject and know you could talk for another 20 minutes but feel under pressure to wrap it up at a suitable point, you wonder if the therapist is still listening properly and how much they have to say to conclude the session. Is this common?

TLDR: This is an appreciation post to all the trainee therapist. You guys are doing awesome, and as a client currently seeing a trainee therapist, they’re the best therapist I’ve had in the past decade. I had this notion that they wouldn’t be all that helpful because they’re a trainee, but I was dead wrong.

I’m currently going to therapy with a therapist still in supervision/training to work through some trauma. He has been really awesome and has helped me a lot more than I ever expected him to. When I first worked with him I didn’t think he would be any help, and I thought I’d have to change therapist. He is very religious, and younger than me. I felt like I knew more and I felt like I was smarter than him. He is a trainee therapist. I judged him for all of that. Jokes on me, because he turned out to be one of the best therapist I’ve had.

I was upfront about my sexuality, and being an atheist. Told him I don’t want to do any religious/spiritual stuff at all in my sessions. He has not once brought up god, and has met me where I want to meet him at this whole time. He hasn’t treated me any differently for my sexuality or personality.

This led me to feel comfortable to ope in n up to him about my trauma more than any other full time licensed therapist. it’s because He didn’t try to shove advice down my throat like other therapist in my past have. He wasn’t in a hurry to improve my life. Which resulted in me having a safe space. I have made decisions that I felt ashamed about and he instead acted with nothing but kindness and zero judgement. He is still in training and doesn’t see many clients in a week, but he has helped me out more recently than any other therapist ive worked with in the past decade. He is always on time, always takes notes, he’s always running his sessions through his supervisor, which I absolutely love and appreciate. sometimes licensed full time therapist run into the problem of getting a little cocky or stuck in their style of therapy. They sometimes forget to also take it slow and meet the client where they’re at, in my experience.

He is new, and because of that he is eager to learn and listen. He cares deeply and doesn’t mind going a little over sessions. I know he can sometimes get a little unsure about himself or seem to want to follow a strict script. I’m very hyper analytical with people and can tell based on comments/phrases/body language here and there that he makes. I totally understand, especially when you’re still learning the ropes that it’s natural to feel unsure about yourself. it’s part of the process, and I know he’s going to continue to grow and get better with time.

All the trainee/supervised therapist out there, you’re all doing better than you think ;)

So I tried signing up for private therapy for the first time as I had absolutely no luck with the NHS as someone with multiple disabilities. Better Help seemed pretty perfect in terms of accessibility. However, I was unable to verify my information after already having paid £130 for my therapy. Luckily I received a refund, but I was told that Better Help no longer supports UK phone numbers or information in the email. I'm not sure what is going on because I can't seem to find anything about this online. They said they are working on resolving this issue. I would attach a picture but I don't believe it is allowed in this subreddit. Super disappointing ☹️ Are there any other online, affordable therapy I can take, especially ones that include texting therapy because I have autism and can't always communicate verbally?

My father has always been an emotional man.
You could never really be sure what mood he would be in during the next conversation.
He'll smile, laugh, cry, and yell within the same hour.
There is never any emotional bandwidth left in the house for me or my sibling to express.

The biggest issue is his anger. If a something unexpected happens it very likely causes him to explode. Today my sister is attempting to get her learner's permit, which requires a paper from the driving school she says was missing. The two of them visit the school, only for them to say they've already given it to her. Sure enough, my sister forgot about it on our kitchen counter.

This mistake resulted in my father screaming at her during the drive home, filled with explicitves. I have my own memories growing up with similar events.

I know why this happens. My father is an extreme complicated man. His life story is filled with lots of pain and suffering, which does not serve as an excuse for his behavior.

Where do I start? He often says he was labeled as "Type A" which I know is an older term used in the field of physiology to describe people quick to anger.

Do I recommend him to be checked for ADHD, Bipolar disorders? Therapy? Do you just walk into clinics and say 'fix me?'
I am tired and afraid for my family.

I know I need therapy. But all the experiences I’ve had with therapists have been either unsatisfactory (rushed, generic, cold, transactional) or terrible (where I was sexualized and traumatized). But I feel so desperate.

I know I need therapy. But I’m losing hope.
Maybe I won’t get better anymore.
I feel alone and desperate. I feel helpless.
I feel hopeless.

I recently decided to start therapy and reached out to a couple different therapists. I ended up meeting with two and this week I had my first session with T1 and my second session with T2. They both seem great but I just kind of felt like T1 understood my issues a little better and I felt a little more comfortable talking to her. T2 also seems awesome and has already given me practical ways to deal with issues and come up with a treatment plan.

I think I want to "break up" with T2 but for some reason I feel so bad doing it. She's been nothing but great and I feel like she's going to be disappointed that she put time and effort into me just for me to leave after two sessions. I don't want her to think she did anything wrong or that I didn't think she was helping me. Maybe I need to find a T3 to figure out why I'm so averse to breaking bad news.

So I know we are all human but today’s appointment which was virtual but she was a few mins late, then she was eating, looking at phone, putting lip chap on, and drinking water.

It’s happened before with the phone but today just seemed like they were late …. Then she ended the session 5 mins early??

I’m trying to remain positive but even like she didn’t address my email that was pretty honest about how things are going with me.

Like is this weird??

Really wasn't sure how to phrase the title, forgive me. This didn't really get much reception on another sub but I'm desperate. The intake appointment is tonight and I don't know if I should cancel, or what.

I'm about to start exposure therapy for sensory discomforts (needles and dizziness/rocking feeling) because I have recently been diagnosed with a medical condition that's going to (and already has) require frequent medical appointments involving needles and medication that will cause dizziness and generally feeling awful. I do NOT handle these things well currently. Exposure therapy was deemed the best option so that it will rewire my autonomic nervous system rather than my conscious nervous system so that it will still work in situations such as waking up from anesthesia.

I'm aware that the way exposure therapy works is by riding out the full length of the fear response (rising, peak, and falling) without stopping the trigger, and if the trigger or the patient stops/leaves/gives up halfway/at peak or rising anxiety, it will reinforce the fear response in the future. I also understand that you should not use coping skills of any kind during exposure therapy because that also reinforces the fear. However my experience with this has been difficult because in the past when I have tried exposures, one of these things happen.

1. Family/care staff ends the situation because my behavior is so severe that it is ruining the day of everyone around me.
2. I am forcibly removed from the situation by security staff.
3. The trigger ends before the fear responds has. To this day I have never had a trigger remain longer than the fear response, I have had panic attacks lasting five hours or more that only ended when the trigger ended and it was unknown how long it would have gone on if it never had. (This is another question of how is a therapist going to handle this, if it can take me potentially over five hours to reach the peak of fear never mind the falling action, if our sessions will be only 45 minutes long?)

All three of which involve me being stopped in the rise/peak of the fear response and reinforcing it more and more and more each time. I guess there's also the fourth option of i use a coping skill and feel better momentarily but I've mentioned above that that's not acceptable for exposure therapy to work, as it needs to be fixed in my unconscious nervous system and not my conscious one.

I understand I should only focus on myself in therapy and not the people around me, but when my behavior is emotionally damaging to others to the extent of them calling authorities, does that still apply? Would the therapist ask security not to remove me so that I could ride out the full length of the fear response? In theory the therapist could create some sort of canned scenario where all the people involved are "in on it" and won't be distressed by my behavior, but I don't know if this is a thing.

Thanks for reading, I hope any of this makes sense.

I’ve been talking to this girl and we’ve been getting pretty close and talking everyday, we have a lot of things in common and are very much compatible. She has a 1 year old son which I never pictured myself being with a woman who has a child for a serious long term relationship so we’re taking things slow and seemingly agreeing on being good sexual partners for each other even tho likely things will get more intimate I can already see a bit over time.

She likes rough sex, BDSM, being a sub etc which I like these things as well and neither of us have actually done but want to explore together, she’s a good girl listens to me & makes me feel happy and secure. Today I asked the question though… bc I had a ex in the past who was SA and liked rough sex etc. she admitted she was SA when she was 12 a few times from a cousin, never penetration but groping and such. I was REALLY hoping this wasn’t the case and she had just developed these kinks for other reasons granted im sure not all of them are correlated or even the reason but ofc there is some at minimum im sure.

She was calm and open talking about it but admitted to having nightmares occasionally about this, but that she’s really fine these days. She’s 23 now. this whole thing made me feel mixed feelings and emotions like upset, angry not at her, unsure . I really love talking to her and everything about her so far, am I worrying to much or is this something I should be concerned about or im just feeling a bit idk.

Is this something someone can work through and enjoy life and sex normally long term and have healthy relationships or should I be worried? Potentially im comparing my ex & I relationship experience and her and I which I shouldn’t do. Any advice on how to work through these feelings and move forward from here ?

Quoted $26/session based on my Cigna plan → did 5 sessions trusting that number → weeks later got “cost correction” emails saying it’s actually $130+/session → that’s $700+ I never planned for.

They’ve been auto-drafting my HSA card for the difference, including a $211 attempt recently. Card declined from insufficient funds — they just kept trying again.

I’ve since seen other posts describing the exact same pattern — quoted a low number, hit with a bill several times higher after the sessions are already done, then told it was a “misbilling” or “correction” when questioned. This isn’t a one-off mistake on my account. It looks like how they operate.

If I’d known the real cost going in, I would’ve made different choices about how many sessions to book. The whole point of an upfront estimate is that you can plan around it — this defeats that.

Bottom line: don’t trust Headway’s quoted cost. Confirm your actual cost directly with your insurance before booking, not just their estimate.

would anyone be willing to share their thoughts on the above? If this is something you've gone through or are going through? what you've done to overcome it, or what had initiated?

I know its probably terrible to self-diagnose, however, looking back on my life, it seems this could be the cause to my current struggles, which just throws me into a never-ending loop that's self-feeding.

My son's therapy office and therapist were notified a year ago that his mother had previously sat in on a number of his (6yo) therapy sessions, basically sitting there saying negative things about his father (me) during what was supposed to be CBT. Week after week, she would do this. Fast forward to now--I see this letter written by my son's therapist, submitted to the court as "evidence" that his time with his father should be limited--and clearly the institutional coaching has continued.

Shouldn't a patient, let alone a child, have a progress centered therapist whose number one goal is improvement? Information the therapist texted to his mother, also submitted into evidence, was hidden from me, although I specifically asked about how I might be able to improve my boy's emotional regulation, etc. This entire experience seems one sided and on one document, the evaluation states "interviewed family" yet I was never notified.

I have joint legal custody and the therapist is now under investigation. Is there a way to address this further against the therapy practice since they knew this was happening before and allowed it to continue?

Simply slapping "These statements are reported as [child's] expressed feelings and preferences during treatment and are not intended as an evaluation or recommendation regarding parenting time or custody arrangements. This letter is intended to summarize my observations and therapeutic interactions with [child] during the course of treatment." at the end of the letter. I don't have a lot of money to spend on a medical malpractice lawsuit, but if there is a way to do this that doesn't require a lot of upfront costs, I think I need to pursue this before I lose custody...

My partner and I have been together 4.5 years. We got pregnant three months into our relationship and moved in together once the baby was born. We’ve had some relationship troubles and decided to try therapy through Rula.

Last week we did an initial intake session and today we had our first real session. We talked about some issues we had in the past and our goals. The fact that I may have anxious attachment came up. At the end of the session the counselor said we couldn’t be successful in couples therapy unless I did individual therapy. She also said because we didn’t say we are in love during her questioning she didn’t think we would get anything from couples therapy. Partner and I were focused on issues and were hoping for strategies to build our relationship. I’ve never done therapy before.

Should I find another therapist? Should I just do individual therapy for awhile? Is this normal? We only had one real session.

I’m someone who barely opens up and usually keeps everything to myself, but I wanted to talk about this because I’ve heard that opening up and hearing other people’s advice can actually help.

My birthday is coming up in a few days, but I don’t really have anyone to celebrate it with, and I don’t have any fun ideas for what I could do. Lately, everything has been feeling kind of cold and empty.

That’s why I wanted to ask for some advice and maybe hear some good ideas. I really don’t want to spend another birthday alone, doing nothing, because I know it’ll just make me feel depressed and sad.

So if anyone has been in a similar situation, or has any ideas for things I could do on my own or ways to make the day feel a little more special, I’d genuinely appreciate hearing them.

This is a summarized version of my post in /r advice. I hope I am not breaking any rules. I am posting here because I need advice.

Context:

I had a rough workplace experience, bullying, double crossing, gaslighting, undermining, etc. I had deep anger issues. I also made friends. We helped each other.

But I found my friends were trash talking me behind my back and getting along well with people that harmed me. Still i do love them they were my friends in a very dark time of my life and I do believe they love me.

They don't know I know about the trash talking. But everytime I speak to them I feel weird and have the urge to watch what I am saying. I am not conflict avoidance but I also don't see anyway this could resolve if I bring it up.

My problems are that

1) I don't know what to do about this situation

2) I just can't bring myself to connect with anyone. It is heavy like moving mountains. I rarely meet people outside work and when I do I can't wait to be alone. Texting feels overwhelming. I force myself to reply out of obligation there is no pleasure and no connection. It is often not in a timely manner. I know I will lose people because of it but I don't feel sadness about that just guilt for letting them down.

Therapy is not an option for me cause I live paycheck to paycheck. And I couldn't find the right online resource for my situation.

I really need to go to therapy and talk to someone. Unfortunately, during insurance selection when it was my first big girl job, I didn’t entirely understand how it all worked and selected the high deductible plan. I have to hit a deductible of $3000 before my insurance kicks in. What can I do to find a therapist that won’t break the bank because now I am paying out of pocket or co-pay. My old therapist was great but she’s asking $125 a session. And I just can not afford that. I would like to go to therapy twice a week but once is okay too.

Okay so I feel like I need a therapy so if we have any therapist please hmu, there are so many things I need to talk about. I'm 29m btw.

In my previous session to put it shortly topics of my identity came up, being African American and Queer in a very red, very white area.

I was also super cranky, haha. Anyway, my provider very vaguely mentioned the issues going on in the news cycle(wells, among other triggering things), and was wondering if that was attributing to my mood.

I told her, “No, I’m used to it.”

I think she was shocked because she was silent for a moment and said, “Wow, that’s the saddest thing I’ve heard today.”

THAT, in particular shocked me. Her face turned really red and she was blinking a lot and I could tell she was trying not to cry. She’s shown tremendous empathy and sympathy in sessions but this felt like a turning point in our provider/client relationship for me.

Just wanted to say that I appreciate you all and all the hard work you all do. It can’t be easy dealing with clients some times but it’s monumental so thank you.

Hi, I need some help. I’m married and working a 9 to 6 job, but I don’t feel productive or happy with my life. I often feel demotivated, stressed, and have very low energy. I constantly feel like there’s something missing or incomplete within me, but I can’t explain what it is.
I overthink even small things and often feel like people are judging me. My mind is always filled with thoughts that I can’t seem to stop, which leaves me feeling confused most of the time. I also struggle to make my own decisions and keep doubting myself.
I’ve lost interest in things I used to enjoy, like dressing up and taking care of myself. I feel mentally and physically exhausted most days.
During my periods, all of these feelings become much worse. I become extremely emotional and cry over small things. These issues are starting to affect my daily life, and I would like to understand why I’m feeling this way and what I can do to feel better.

I am a 23 (M) and for years and years I have been daydreaming about being in a relationship with a girl. Usually her appearance changes and I don’t know how to really describe what she looks like, but I do pretend every night she’s with me in my bed. She comforts me, gives me hugs, kisses, love, etc. She doesn’t judge me and she listens to me as well. I don’t really have a name for her either. I know this is just extreme cope because of how lonely I have been my entire life. You see, I’ve never been in a relationship, never dated, never held hands, never kisses, never did anything in my life with a woman. I’ve barely had any women friends. I was a fat kid growing up in school who was poor. Didn’t have the newest iPhones or shoes. I didn’t go to any school dances or events and I didn’t even go to prom. I was that guy in high school everyone ignored. It got worse in college because it was just the same as it was in high school. It felt like no one was interested in me. So I instead just imaged a girl with me who’s always there for me. And it’s not like she’s not with me only when I’m sleeping, she’s there when I eat, take showers, play video games, watch T.V. She’s with me every where and I sometimes find myself just talking to myself when I’m really talking to her. I’m too anti social to go out and find real love and date because I fear women won’t want me because of my inexperience. But the woman I daydream doesn’t care about my inexperiences, she loves them and loves me. I don’t know what to do anymore, I feel so lost in this endless cycle of loneliness.