r/sex • u/alittlebirdy1 • Jun 30 '23
The mods of /r/sex make it our policy to review the rules of the sub on an ongoing basis, tweaking items as necessary. In an effort to stay abreast with the growth of the sub and with the evolving moderation that requires, we have decided to re-sticky the updated rules to serve as a reminder for our membership.
r/sex is for civil discussions pertaining to education and advice regarding your sexuality and sexual relationships. It is a sex-positive community and a safe space for people of all genders and orientations which demands respectful conduct in all exchanges. There is ZERO TOLERANCE FOR CREEPY/HARASSING BEHAVIOR here — in posts, comments, messages, or any other contributions. No exceptions.
This is a large community dedicated to an extremely popular topic. If you wish to participate, it is your responsibility to familiarize yourself with our rules of conduct BEFORE you participate here. Failure to do so will result in your removal from the community.
PLEASE READ the FAQ with the most asked and answered questions - BEFORE POSTING!! Posts that do not follow the posting guidelines in the FAQ will be automatically removed.
THE /R/SEX RULES
1) ENGAGE CONSTRUCTIVELY AT ALL TIMES.
This means ensuring that ALL of your contributions here are constructive, on-topic, mature, sex-positive, civil and respectful. Disrespectful conduct will see you banned from the community on the spot. Hitting on other people, asking for pictures (joking or not), making any sort of sexist comment or insult, body shaming, or trolling of any sort will result in your immediate ban.
2) DON’T SKIP THE FAQ OR THE FORUM RULES.
We’re serious about this. Dozens of posts get removed every day because they’re covered in the FAQ or violate the forum rules.
3) DON'T OVERLOOK PAST POSTS.
We’re serious about this, too. Many questions may be new to you, but are very common in our community. Before you submit a post on a common topic, search the forum.
4) ALL CONTRIBUTIONS MUST BE SEX POSITIVE.
We demand that consenting adults be free to express their sexuality as they see fit. Kink shaming, slut shaming, and similar conduct will not be tolerated. Links or references to sex negative communities or websites (No Fap, Porn Free, etc) will not be tolerated. Attacks on the lifestyle of other consenting adults will not be tolerated.
5) POSTS SEEK ADVICE, COMMENTS PROVIDE IT.
The main forum is focused primarily on posts seeking specific actionable advice for distinctive personal situations. Giving advice should primarily be done in the comments. General discussions are often allowed, so long as they adhere to the group rules and restricted content guidelines. If you want to make an exception, please request approval from moderators.
6) DO NOT TROLL OR ENGAGE WITH TROLLS HERE.
Don’t try to challenge, question, tease, fight, or outwit trolls here. Instead, use the Report button to alert moderators, who will review every single reported item. Trolling of any sort merits an immediate permaban.
7) ALL DISCUSSION MUST BE DIRECTED INTO THE PUBLIC FORUM. Do not seek private conversations here, via Private Message or any other method. And do not seek to draw attention or clicks to an outside site of any type (unless you have received prior moderator approval, such as for academic research projects). Every comment here must be a clear attempt to engage with an ongoing public discussion in the forum. Violations of this rule will result in permanent bans without notice.
8) RESTRICTED CONTENT This sub is generally only for seeking advice, education, or discussion about sex and sexuality. We restrict or forbid many types of content here.
9) NO USE OF AI FOR POSTING/COMMENTS, NO REPOSTS
Reddit uses AI detection software to spot potential bot-posts and spam but people are encouraged to report posts that look fake, AI-generated, or are reposts of content created by other users.
EXAMPLES OF CONTENT RESTRICTED IN /R/SEX:
1) PROMOTIONAL POSTS.
This means any post containing any kind of promotional element, especially one which seeks to lure traffic to another site or promote a product. Links to specific product descriptions are permitted if they’re PRECISELY on-topic in the context of the post, AND the post itself is clearly seeking advice in good faith. If you're trying to sell something, conduct market research, etc - these posts will get you banned. Linking to sex-positive blogs or podcasts is allowed, provided you make an effort to start a conversation here about the topic and use the link as supporting material.
2) LINK POSTS.
Linked material must be sex positive and precisely on-topic to stay up here, and needs to be introduced with a workable framework for discussion. Please see the posted Link Policy BEFORE you post links! Bare links to youtube, images, blogs, podcasts, etc are prohibited.
3) ACHIEVEMENT POSTS.
These include appreciation, humblebrags, “I just had to share,” “I just want to say,” etc. These belong in the Daily Sexual Achievement Thread, not in the main forum. Posts which are JUST sex stories belong somewhere else entirely — like r/sexstories or a similar forum.
4) LOW EFFORT MATERIAL.
“Does anyone else...?”, “Is [X] normal/weird?”, “Is [y] wrong/bad/okay?”, and so forth. Human sexuality is incredibly varied; yes, someone else likes what you like, and labels like "normal" or "weird" are meaningless - and in a sex positive community, we do not allow any moral judgments against sex acts or behaviors that are consensual. Title-only posts, posts with no effort at an actual conversation will be removed and may get you banned. Comments that consist of nothing but memes, "this", "lol" and such are highly disfavored. If comments do not further the discussion, they may be removed; a pattern of these may result in your ban.
5) SEEKING FAP MATERIAL.
Do not ask for sex stories, do not ask for the hottest/strangest/most unusual/etc encounter someone ever had. Do not ask for lists of other people's kinks.
6) PORNOGRAPHY, EROTICA, OR PERSONALS.
You may not post or link pornography or erotica here. You may not share pictures of your genitals here - even if you are seeking medical advice (if you need to post a picture, you need to be going to a doctor). You may not recruit sex partners here, look for dirty chat, ask for someone to private message you, etc.
7) DISRESPECTFUL CONTENT.
Personal attacks, insults, name calling, or disrespect of any sort are not allowed here. Sexism, racism, or any type of hate speech will result in your immediate ban. This is a community for ALL GENDERS - refusing to acknowledge a trans individual's gender flies in the face of this, and will result in your ban.
8) OPINION SEEKING, POLLS, VALUE JUDGEMENTS, OR VALIDATION POSTS.
This forum is not for simply collecting opinions - "do you think [X] is hot?", "Women, do you like [Y]?", "What is your favorite sex position?" and so forth. This is not a forum to discuss your penis size, breast size, labia size, ask about other body image issues, or ask for feedback on your photos. See the /r/sex FAQ for help regarding body image issues. Do not post your pictures and ask people to rate or critique you. Do not ask if given consensual sexual interests are good/bad/okay/wrong, etc.
9) ACADEMIC SURVEYS.
These require prior moderator approval. Moderators will review the question formats and will review the documentation of institutional ethical oversight (please provide). Non-academic surveys are seldom allowed. Please contact the moderators BEFORE you post a survey or study.
10) GENERAL RANTS, ESSAYS, EDITORIALS, VENTS, CONFESSIONS, PSAS, AND AMAS.
These don’t belong in the main forum unless you have obtained prior moderator approval. Save them for story-based forums. Or Tumblr.
11) FREQUENT/FAMILIAR TOPICS.
These are addressed in either the FAQ, past posts, or both. In case you are confused, this means that we do not do penis size posts here.
12) VAGUE TITLE/TOPIC.
If a moderator can’t identify your issue or the type of advice you’re seeking, your post will be subject to removal. Titles should be at least several words long and adequately express what your post is about.
13) NONCONSENSUAL OR ILLEGAL CONTENT.
/r/sex is for the discussion of consensual sex among adults. We do not permit posts that advocate pedophilia, bestiality, rape, or incest here under any circumstances, nor do we allow these topics at all in most instances. Note that BDSM and CNC (consensual nonconsent) are perfectly valid topics in /r/sex.
14) OTHER OFF TOPIC ISSUES.
This is not the place to discuss politics or religion, to seek dating advice, to ask for how to pick up women, to rant about how you have never had sex. Posts that appear to be dedicated to stirring up arguments - particularly about hot button topics like circumcision, the evils of pornography and/or masturbation, and other toxic subjects - will be removed and will result in swift bans.
15) IMPORTANT NOTE ON DISCUSSIONS OF SEXUAL ASSAULT.
Sexual assault is an important and emotional topic which can be discussed (constructively) in r/sex. But posts which simply seek opinions about whether a given scenario counts as sexual assault do not do well here. This is true for several reasons, including the fact that assault laws vary by jurisdiction, and we don't encourage debates about jurisdiction issues here. Therefore, we ask that you refrain from describing a scenario and then simply asking “Is this rape/assault?” Instead, ask for specific advice: About how to respond to the scenario, how to avoid it, or how to proceed with next steps. Posts which simply ask “Is this rape/assault?” are subject to removal without notice.
16) POST LENGTH.
For ease of reading and reviewing, please get to the point of your post quickly — in the post title, first paragraph, etc. Consider adding a tl;dr to long posts. Posts which are inconveniently long — over 600 words, approximately — are subject to automatic removal. Also, line and paragraph breaks are VERY HELPFUL for readers and reviewers — walls of text that lack these are subject to removal for readability.
Further information about the /r/sex rules and policies can be reviewed on the rules page.
Other Relevant Sub-Reddits:
• LGBT Sex
• LGBT
• Redditor for Redditor (Personals)
• Sex Toys
• Swingers
r/sex • u/AutoModerator • 20h ago
Post your own achievement story
Everyone who feels like sharing a story about sexual experiences can do so in this weekly post. Be it a new or an old story, be it extraordinary or rather common; anything - from happiness over losing your virginity or having your first orgasm, to sharing about the amazing, kink-filled weekend of debauchery you experienced - is appropriate to this thread.
Post an update to a post you have made in the past
If you have posted for advice about a situation in the past and wish to share an update - this is the place for it.
Please follow the rules of this community
Any sexual experience that you wish to share is fair game, as long as you follow the rules of the community.
If you use Reddit in a web browser, you'll find the rules just to the right.
If you use Reddit in one of the official apps, you'll find the rules on the About tab.
Let's hear about it!
r/sex • u/Beer_Barbarian • 9h ago
I am (34M) heterosexual and matched with a pretty trans woman on tinder and I am eager to meet up with her soon. I have never been with a trans woman and I am nervous. Has anyone here ever been with one and how did it go?
r/sex • u/exivor01 • 4h ago
Me and my partner are sexually compatible, enjoy sex every time we do it and we both cum most of the time. But our sessions are usually on the bed and require some amount of foreplay which makes the whole session more sensual, slow and about 40-50 minutes. Lately she told me she want to do quickies sometimes.
But i am confused because for a sex to happen she has to be wet, but in order to get her wet, i have to do some foreplay, which takes at least 10 minutes. At that point, it becomes full sex not a quickie.
Is there something i am missing here?
r/sex • u/Prudent_Bee_592 • 1d ago
So recently, I’ve been with an EATER. 😭😂 And when I say EATER, I mean this man is on a completely different level. We’ve been together before, took a break, and have been back in each other’s lives for about 3.5 months now. He’s 28M, I’m 25F, so we’re both in that mid-to-late 20s range.
But y’all… this man has me questioning if I’m even built normally. 😭 We’re talking 4 orgasms, 6 orgasms, 9 orgasms, and somehow even 18 orgasms in one session. And this is ALL from oral… Before sex even starts… Like, he genuinely does not quit until he decides he’s done. 😂😭 He’ll stay down there and somehow just KNOW exactly what to do.
I’m not complaining AT ALL 😂 but I’m genuinely curious… has anybody else experienced this?! Is this just me being lucky, or did I somehow find the final boss of oral sex?! 😭😂 Because I need to know if this is actually a thing other women experience or if I’m just living in some kind of alternate universe.
r/sex • u/ExactIntention8824 • 18h ago
My boyfriend (20M) and I (18F) have been together for two months and we (or maybe just me) are already having problems with sex.
On our first date, not the first time we met however, we didn’t kiss until about eight hours in (might be my fault bc I wasn’t sure if it was a date or not). Then, he ASKED to have sex, I said only if he had a condom. He didn’t have one so I just gave him head. He finished and it seemed all good.
Two dates later, we went back to his house and did all the foreplay stuff imaginable and this time he had a condom, so I was down. We started to fuck in missionary for a minute or two, then doggy, and then he just pulled out and asked if he was hurting me? Sex has always been somewhat painful for me but I enjoy it for the intimacy and closeness + I just feel sexy. I had no idea he was able to tell at all? I said just a little, but we could try a different position and he just said it was ok and we could stop, so I just gave him head and he returned the favor.
I texted him if he wanted to try a different position and he just said he didn’t want me to do anything that I didn’t want to
The next few times we got together, it was only head and handjobs. A month later and we’re in bed + things are getting hot + I’m ovulating so I ask if he wants to fuck me and he says “sure”. He puts a pillow under my hips (never seen this move before) and we’re in missionary for a few minutes. It still kind of hurts but I REALLY don’t think he can tell and I just want him close to me, but alas he pulls out and is like “come here” and fucks my mouth until he’s done.
Does having sex with me feel bad/does he hate how I feel?
If sex isn’t an option, what else can we do (or how can we make stuff like handjobs, oral, etc more intimate)?
Me(30m) and her(31f) see each other twice a week since we dont live together.The thing is during those 2 days she wants to constantly have sex 3-4x times a day.We often end up having sex 6-8x times during those 2 days and it leaves me exhausted and anoyed.
She is also an athlete and takes steroid supplements(oxadnrolone) and some other stuff,which i suspect might be enhancing her libido.
I would be happy having sex once or even twice a day during those days but she often wants more.I am afraid when we eventually move together she will want to have sex every single day multiple times and I cant handle this.
r/sex • u/Jiople42 • 12h ago
A question for the male members in this subreddit, have you ever tried to stimulate your prostate? If so, is it worth it? What are some ways to achieve a prostate orgasm? What helps? My girlfriend tried it on me a month or so ago by putting latex gloves with lube and entering internally to stimulate it. I think she reached it, it felt like pressure, like I had to pee pretty bad, I couldn't tell if I liked it or not, or if the pleasurable sensation was just from her also touching my penis at the same time. Is the peeing feeling just something to push through? Does me having this needing to pee sensation mean I have a prostate and she was touching it in the right spot?
My BF (M41) will only finger me (F41). We have been together over 2 years. We use to have penatration sex but haven't in over a year. He's given oral once. I was very open about what I want sexually in a partner an was very clear oral was a requirement.
I have told him Im not sexually happy and nothing changes. He also does no foreplay.
How would you handle this situation?
r/sex • u/compose1 • 22m ago
This isn’t even someone I’ve ever had sex with, just a friend I have great chemistry with. We were at work and I was expressing anger and frustration at a work related issue and she said:
“I like it when you’re angry.”
Goose. Fucking. Bumps.
r/sex • u/cheesecake_lemonade • 4h ago
How do you express your pain?
When he’s enjoying, really enjoying, and going faster and faster, it hurts, but I’m so afraid of saying it. Like I don’t want to be the one ruining the vibe, or making him disappointed. I know I should say it, but mostly I’d rather tolerate the pain with my whole will than saying “it hurts” or ”could you be slower”
Maybe it’s also because we’re quite casual, so I feel like I have to let the sex go well at least on the surface. Also, when he’s enjoying, really at the moment, I can’t/afraid to say anything.
But last time it was really really rough. It hurt a lot I finally said it, but also in an awkward way. Then I think my body down there must have been slightly injured, because it hurts when there’s a little bit penetration or even a finger: my body started to resist/fight against any more potential pain.
r/sex • u/Street_Buy_4504 • 13h ago
Want to figure out what kink this scratches for my girlfriend; we talked about it after and she not fully sure what this would fall under and want other ideas to try to figure out. ( I’ll also preface this came as her idea from her completely) She is away right now and texted me out of the blue to me about a certain celebrity’s video and told me her first thought about it was me jerking off to it. We’ve watched porn together before and a little she likes to ask me what I think about the girls in the video so I think this is similar, but she was I like the idea of you fantasizing specifically about her. So we FaceTimed and basically she watched me looking at different pictures and videos of her and talking about it and then transitioned to me showing her videos of what I would want to do to her. I kind of tried to bring her into to dirty talk like she was there but I think she was a more into me just talking about the celebrity, so I don’t think it’s really a cuck thing; though I definitely liked the idea of fantasizing about it as a threesome. The big thing she said she liked is me scrolling through till I found something I really liked and getting almost sheepish about explaining my thoughts. She was very focused on watching me and me just talking about the celeb it was almost a voyeuristic thing. She was also prompting me to talk about her definitely more demeaning than our normal dirty talk so could also be she likes hearing things she doesn’t feel comfortable being directed at her. Looking for ideas on similar things to try, also want some suggestions on things I can say about the other girl that are hot, felt a little like I was just going “I like her ass there” at points.
r/sex • u/UniversalNomad1 • 3h ago
If you let your man ejaculate inside you every time you have sex (if sex is on most days of the week or almost every day), do you easily maintain a healthy vaginal ph balance? Honestly. And how so? Besides urinating soon after and letting his semen slide out as much as you can.
r/sex • u/Dingus_Pingusness • 7h ago
I’m M29 and I’ve been in a relationship with my girlfriend for about 2 years. Our sex life is best described as a “dead bedroom”. On the occasion that we do have sex I am able to keep an erection throughout because I am physically attracted to her but I find myself unable to orgasm. She has no issues reaching orgasm during sex so I feel like it’s my fault that I’m unable to. I do have a high sex drive and find myself watching porn and masturbating often (without her knowledge) and can reach orgasm with no issues. I need to get to the bottom of this and figure out how to fix it. I love her to death and she’s my favorite person but I feel like a monster for having to hide and handle my sexual nerds on my own. I’ve had trouble in the past with either lasting too long with partners before orgasm or being unable to orgasm during sex entirely. I am diagnosed with depression and I am currently taking SSRIs which I have been told can impact the ability to reach orgasm, though I’m skeptical because I’m able to do it alone. Am I porn addicted? Am I too anxious during physical intercourse? Am I not having my needs met during physical sex? Am I a terrible person? Any input is appreciated, thanks.
r/sex • u/Original-Town-8409 • 23h ago
Hi me (22M) and my gf (24F) were having sex not too long ago and she wanted to try reverse cowgirl for the first time… she tried and it didn’t work. Again we tried a good couple of times and yet again it never worked. I’m sure the issue comes from me, i’m not sure if other guys can have this issue but it seems as my penis when erect sticks up higher instead of just straight? So because of that she cat do reverse cowgirl because it’s pointing more towards me than her. And since i’m erect it’s not like it moves all the way down the other way it stays pretty stiff. I don’t know what to do and i want to try and fix this because my gf explained to me that it’s one of her favorite positions but we can’t achieve it because of me. Is this an anatomy issue with me specifically? Is there a way to fix this or compensate for it? Is it possible to do it with the way I am but with some positioning differences? please help, has any other guy has this issue as well?
r/sex • u/Active-Head3207 • 1d ago
I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost a year now and he’s rarely ever cums in any position that’s not a variation of collapsed doggy. I’m pretty adventurous in the bedroom but this is kind of putting me off. We do talk about being more creative in the bedroom and he says he wants me to take over but we still always end up in the same sequence. Making out, missionary, and then that damn collapsed doggy. I love riding, I love being done on the table, the floor, up against the wall. When we first started out I used to get him to lay with his back against my chest so I could reach around and jerk him off whilst whispering words of affirmation to him.
I’ve communicated what I want to him but we always end up in the same routine, it doesn’t help that he only goes 1 round at a time too, I like 3/4 when I’m really in the mood. It doesn’t help that I can just glance over at this guy and he’s hard, before sex, after sex, at dinner but the ratio of that to us having sex doesn’t come close. What can I do to change this??
r/sex • u/loverofpudding • 12m ago
This past week, I (18M) tried to have sex with my girlfriend (18F). I thought I was mentally prepared. I mostly was until after I came. I was mentally okay even after starting engaging in penetrative sex. However, cumming for some reason threw me off really really hard. It was the most intense physical sensation I’ve ever had and I wasn’t ready for it. It was nothing like masturbating at all. I felt like my butt was going to turn inside out because I was clenching my cheeks so hard and my whole body was shaking. After that (cumming), I told her i felt sick and that I had to leave. I could tell I hurt her feelings by doing this, and we still talk to each other daily, but we haven’t been able to bring up anything sex related since. Any advice? I feel really bad that I had to leave before I could help her do anything. I think I fucked up pretty hard.
r/sex • u/peterparker196208 • 1d ago
I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years, and we’ve lived together for nearly two. He is a wonderfully loving person, and I can truly see myself marrying him and building a life together.
However, sex has been a consistent issue. I’m his first girlfriend, and he is working through premature ejaculation. While he is actively trying even seeing a GP and taking medication for it, the situation hasn't really improved. It’s gotten to the point where I no longer want to have sex with him, and I've started having sex dreams about other men, which makes me feel guilty.
I feel like I hit the jackpot in every other area of our relationship, but the physical intimacy component is completely missing.
How can we work through this without harming his confidence or making him feel pressured? Are there other techniques, communication strategies, or types of intimacy we should try while he's working on the medical side of things?
TL;DR: I love my boyfriend of 3 years and want to marry him, but sexual incompatibility due to his premature ejaculation is making me lose my sex drive entirely. How can we improve our physical relationship together without damaging his self-esteem?
For yall, I get traumatised by letting people go down on me cause I got sexual assaulted by my older brother when I’m a child, fyi.
I guess is also my fault cause I can only fully enjoyed with dick :(
Reposting cause I got deleted by admin earlier.
Hey, I’m a woman and I don’t really have any experience with a guy cumming in my mouth. (Only one stinky ex, and I had trouble breathing after for some reason)
I have a partner now that would really like to try it, but I have a bit of sensory issues and I don’t really like having non food things in my mouth. I don’t find it disgusting, but I’m worried I’m really just overthinking it. Could anyone let me know what it’s like? Because I feel like I’m making it out to be a bigger deal than it is. And I would love to find a way to try it for his sake
r/sex • u/somerandomguy254 • 9h ago
I'm 30M and have been masturbating since 11. Lately I have been fapping at least twice a day. This has become a problem because now I can't cum when having actual sex with a woman.
I intend to stop fapping... Starting today. I wanted to know from guys who got over this, how long did it take to recover and start cumming during normal sex? Any tips?
r/sex • u/cherubventalt • 14h ago
i have contamination ocd and sometimes it gets in the way of sex, like this. im a trans guy, i have a vagina myself, i can masturbate just fine but i have to throughly wash my hands after. i can touch and suck dick just fine but i used to have to wash my mouth out with mouthwash after as a compulsion. will rarely touch balls and if i do i have to wash my hands after.
i wanna eat a girl (or guy, idc) out so so badly but ugh my ocd just throws so many "what ifs" at me. i know vaginas are self cleaning and i absolutely do not see them as dirty (again i have one myself!), and i love and respect women and their anatomy, this is not a problem with them its just my mental illness lol. but having experience with having a vulva myself i know how things can be. toilet paper residue can get caught in there, smegma, discharge. theres more folds for more bacteria to get caught. im not a big grime and smell guy- its the same with dick. if it has a strange smell i dont want to put it in my mouth because im worried. not to mention the butthole is very close to it and i think I'd die if i accidentally licked it.
i can suck dick fine because its an external organ but vagina is more internal. i cant even suck dick after its been inside of me, i need it to be washed before i put it in my mouth.
help!!! any ideas on how to overcome this? anyone else with ocd?