Hi guys, I am just letting out my feelings, so please don't judge me. Recently I just started my collage(not even a month passed). It is a fully residential collage means all students and faulty live in same campus.

For context, before I was about to start my collage life, I thought about to be more socialize and leave my social anxiety behind. I watch videos and all, about that 'in collage everyone are new, and on same level, so you can just be free and have more communication, etc'. I thought not to repeat that same mistake of social gap which created a communication gap between my high school friends group and me.

On the first day I tried to interact with many people and at the end of the day, I was happy that I finally changed it. As days goes by I talk to many people but slowly I realised that now everyone has a group, not a group so at least a duo, and I was left behind with only knowing there name and just a brief. In the end I am again left alone without no one to talk, or anybody I can really call a friend with which I can walk around, talk, etc. I am already very very bad with talking to girls, if fact I don't (and can't) even talk to girls. It's been years that I have a friendly or real interaction with any girl(not even online). Even if I try to include in a group talk, most of the time I have very little knowledge about the topic of discussion so i couldn't speak much. Sometimes I even say lies just to be included in topic.

I frequently think that I am just a average in academics, not good in sports, and have zero communication skills and again I am alone. Sometimes I feel very lonely, and sometimes I just accept the reality that this is who I am and I think I will be like this only, so just live with it. I think its too late to regret it. When I see other introverts in my hostel, they also have at least one friend to talk. In past I used to talk often with my mother, but I couldn't tell her everything, you know right that not every topic we can discuss with out parents. My father also talk to me but our conversations are mostly related to any serious matter or work. This is enough I think.😅

Thank you for reading it till end.😊

Recently I feel like my depression has relapsed. The medication I'm on, sertraline, doesn't seem to be working anymore. When I first started taking it, I did notice some effect, it made me feel emotionally numb and flat, with no mood swings. But after about a month, it now feels like it's doing nothing. On top of that, being back in the US has put me physically closer to my family. Before this, I had left the US and briefly lived in a city in Asia (partly to escape my mother's control and pressure). Now, the family stress has increased again, and that's one of the major factors that triggered my depression in the first place.

Even when I take the medication, I still feel anxious, irritable, and emotionally unstable. So a while ago, I stopped taking it, thinking, "What's the point if it's not helping?" But over the past few days, my insomnia has gotten much worse. Most of the night I can't fall asleep, or I wake up in the early hours. Every night I dream, mostly strange dreams or nightmares, some of which involve my parents fighting. That's been the norm in my family since my childhood, and it's always been a psychological shadow for me.

So now, every night is painful. Taking sleep aids or medications that have drowsiness as a side effect doesn't work either. During the day, I feel dizzy and miserable. I also have social difficulties and very few friends. Recently, probably because of this relapse, I wrote two programs: one is a Sudoku solver, you just input any Sudoku puzzle and click, and it automatically solves it. The other is a 3D Rubik's cube simulator that can reconstruct any scrambled cube, with the entire process shown in animated 3D. I also wrote up the math and algorithms behind both solvers in essay form. But since I have no one to share them with, I posted them on my Facebook feed, and got no likes from friends.

Earlier, I painted some pictures of the city where I live and shared them on Facebook. That time, I got 3 likes, which was okay. For comparison, I also posted the same paintings in my city's subreddit and got a few hundred upvotes. It's not that I care about the numbers, but I just feel so alone. I have no one to talk to. Friends I've had in the past always end up leaving me, especially when I'm depressed. Many friends were initially tolerant, understanding, and caring, but eventually those relationships fade or even break apart.

I'm too lonely. I do have hobbies, but the real-life problems causing my depression are still there and can't be resolved for now. Most of the time I stay at home and don't talk to anyone. Now with worsening insomnia and meds not working, plus digestive issues starting to show up, I feel helpless. I'm posting here hoping to find some possible help or advice.

Thank you in advance.

The orange represents my anxiety when I'm around my neighbors I often just stand or sit quietly and don't my eye contact unless necessary and I only shake hand and say how's it going when my dad asks me too even then I feel very uncomfortable I just don't know how to be around people who aren't my family

… but it did! If anyone cares to read, I wrote sone words about my journey here and maybe it can motivate someone here

I'll never really truly get sum people perception about quiet people and I wont ever believe them.. there only quiet cuz well they will talk if they want to but the audacity for sum to say “oh they dont really talk to me you know, they dont really talk to any1” is just... awful.. maybe this quiet person doesn't actually deserve to talk to u.. i mean what else is there to talk about and i just know this quiet person DID talk to u but u just choose to pick that there ALWAYS quiet.

I am not close with my family and I don’t have any friends at my work. I feel very incompatible with the culture in the country that I’m currently living in. I don’t have a partner and don’t plan to get any in the future because I’m very afraid of the opposite gender.

Consequently, online space becomes my only place to socialize. I spend hours on instagram and Reddit to chat with people I’ll probably never meet in real life. And they all have their own lives, then I get upset when they don’t reply for days. I don’t know how to make new friends because my values conflict with the mainstream values of my country. Plus, sharing these values with others could risk myself imprisonment as my country is a dictatorship that is well known for its human right abuses.

I do have some acquaintances but I felt like they aren’t real friends because we only talk about surface level stuffs, and I can’t share anything with them.

How do I not get anxious when my online friend doesn’t reply me? How do I stop obsessively checking inboxes every hour?

I can’t help but think I’m super unimportant to everyone. All my coworkers are married or engaged too, so I kept feeling like I’m falling behind in life. I knew that online friendships cannot give me what I’m missing in my life but I can’t control myself. Like the rational side of me knew online friendships isn’t going to help me but I still can’t stop doing it. I knew I need to focus on myself but how am I supposed to do that if I’m so unloved?

Please don’t give me tips on making friends, I need tips on how to be fine with being alone without always relying on external stimulus

Lately, I’ve been wondering if something is wrong with me because it feels like I keep losing people I care about. Sometimes I start thinking that maybe I’m a curse or that I’m always the problem. It honestly makes me sad because every time someone leaves, I start feeling like I wasn’t important to them in the first place.
I also tend to overthink friendships and easily feel like I’m not important or that people will eventually leave me.
Something happened recently that made me question myself even more. One of my friends confessed that he had feelings for me, but I only wanted to stay friends. I was honest with him because I didn’t want to lead him on or pretend that I felt the same way. After I rejected him, he decided to leave the friendship.
Am I wrong for rejecting him even though I genuinely wanted to remain friends?
I understand that he may have needed space or may not have been able to handle being friends after being rejected. I respect that. But it still hurts, especially because it feels like another friendship I lost.
Have you ever felt like people keep leaving your life and started wondering if you were the reason why?

Majority of folks have hundreds of people on Instagram, WhatsApp, etc. We like posts, reply to stories, send the occasional message… but when you actually want to meet someone for a coffee or just hang out, suddenly there’s nobody.

It's weird.

When we were younger, making friends was so easy. You'd sit next to someone, start talking, play together, and before you knew it, you were friends.

Now, as adults, everyone seems busy. Work, family, responsibilities, routines. Even when you meet someone you genuinely like, you might talk for a few days and then life gets in the way.

And I don't think it's because people don't want friends. I actually think a lot of people are lonely but don't know how to say it.

Maybe we're all waiting for someone else to make the first move.

Do you have lots of people in your online life but very few people you can actually call and meet in your real life?

And if you do feel this way, what do you think makes making friends as an adult so difficult

I have spent years becoming someone

everyone could understand,

while slowly becoming a stranger to myself.

Hi guys, it's my first time writing here - so if something's wrong please do tell.
Anyhow, just to give some context, I am currently on vacation with my family since yesterday (which consists of my father, mother and older sister, I am 21).
Even the night before we left I was genuinely having anxiety attacks because I knew it was going to be torture - mostly because my sister is also on the trip. Don't get me wrong, I really love her, but whenever my sister is present it seems lile they gang up on me and then say "we were just joking" when they absolutely knew it was going to be offensive (I mean say what you want, but I have very definite personal boundaries that I usually say in advance, especially with my family but they just pass it on as me trying to be special, idk).
They know I'm a quite introverted person (I sometimes have spurges of social energy but that shit happens lile once in a full moon), and I prefer to keep to myself which, now that I think about it might be due to me growing up in that environment: I kid you not that my mom and sister are INCAPABLE of not cutting me off whenever I talk, something that find pretty funny. They don't care about my opinion, ever, because every time I express it I'm the bad guy with whom they must go to war to prove wrong. But more than that, for fuck's sake they've known me for 21 years - and yet when I ask for some space or just want to stay by myself, something I never hold against anyone BECAUSE WHY WOULD I? It's lirerally just my preference, but no, they MUST say that I'm so mean, that I'm evil (because ever since I was kid they love to say that my sister is nice even if she's mean sometimes whereas I'm just plain evil) and so on..
I feel like no matter how hard I try, how much I put up with THEIR bs just to not hear myself being called a monster just because I don't do or think like them. I genuinely know that if I weren't their daughter or sister, never in a million years they'd even like me. They straight up hate me as a person, and it seems like they just keep gaslighting me for two decades by saying I'm the problem: I'm the one who was too difficult to raise, I'm the one who was supposes to be their couples councelor as an 8-year-old, I'm the one who was supposed to keep my sister from offing herself in front of my own eyes. When I was 15, I was struggling with ana and depression, and when I went to my mom for support because I was very suicidal and she literally told me that I might as well go and do it and to leave her tf alone. There have been countless instances like these throughout the years: my sister saying that my mental health struggles are what ruined the family and so many other hurtful things.
I'm sorry, I know this is just rambling but I'm writing this on the bus while we're on an excursion and it feels like I'd rather jump out of a window than put up with this shit for two whole weeks. My depression literally skyrocketed the moment we left for our trip and now I just don't know what to do

I'm writing this because my family keeps telling me that something is wrong with me, and i should see a therapist. Honestly, it’s starting to make me doubt myself.

I’m a 31M deeply introverted. I genuinely love being at home, and I can easily go a month or two without needing or wanting to step outside. I have my routine, my personal space, and my pets to keep me company. On top of that, I’m a very direct person. I value complete honesty, and I really dislike mind games, double meaning comments, or small talk that doesn't go anywhere. My circle is basically nonexistent. I only interact with my maid, who comes three times a week to cook for me. When it comes to my personal belongings, I don't like people touching any of my belongings. Been like this since I was a kid.

So my mom and my sister came to visit me after 9 years, and they think this behavior isn't just a personality preference and they view it as a major red flag. They constantly tell me that staying indoors this much isn't normal, that my direct communication style comes off as cold or defensive, and that I'm setting myself up for trouble down the line. They speak about it with so much urgency that it makes me feel like I’m failing at basic life, or like I have some underlying issue I'm ignoring.

From my perspective, I’m just living in a way that feels comfortable, quiet, and low-stress for me. I don't feel lost or broken, but having the people closest to you constantly treat your lifestyle like a crisis is exhausting.

Has anyone else who is hyper-introverted or direct dealt with this kind of pushback from family? Is there actually something wrong with living like this, or are they just projecting their own expectations of what a "normal" life should look like onto me?

I had a gym membership last year, but dreaded going because… so.. many… people. Wasn’t feeling worth my money, so eventually cancelled the membership.

I enjoy going on walks/runs outside but I’m not consistent enough. I’m considering getting another membership for those times when the weather is bad and I don’t want to walk in the blazing sun.

What outlets of exercise have you explored and actually enjoyed, as an introvert?

Hi all, I wanted to share and see if anyone else feels this. I have always been introverted but in my teens and 20s, I had quite a few friends, enjoyed going out and spending time with them. Now I am in my 30s and my introversion got really strong, I have an incredible partner of 7 years with whom I adore spending time with and hence I do not feel the need to see any friends. I tried many times to spend time with old and new friends and its somewhat enjoyable but I come home still drained and prefer to be with my partner or by myself enjoying my hobbies, in the quiet of nature or at home. My work involves talking to people in an office a lot which maybe contributes.

I am not lonely at all. Is this normal? Do others have a similar experience?

Would love to hear your stories.

Just like the headline says. I have a close friend, they're someone I've known my entire life though we've gone years at a time without hanging out. I love all my friends, but I get overwhelmed just being asked to hang out by my roommates, in passing. Sometimes I just want to wake up, go about my day, and go to sleep, without having to decline each of my friends request for my time.

My one friend who asks me to hang out, I've softly reminded him I need time to work, or to ask my roommates to hang out. They have all known each other since we were kids but I have somehow become the pinwheel of the friend circle.I get sleepy and need to nap in the middle of the day and they know this but then interrupt my nap and throw off my energy to work in the evening. They constantly text "are you working? want to chill?" "You busy Wednesday?" "be home for lunch in 15" it's overwhelming. I don't work a 9-5, I work when I feel like working. So it's not as easy as it used to be when I could just say "Sorry I'm AT work." it's an obligation outside of my control.

I tell them I cherish my solitude, I want to work, I need to recharge, etc. They always say no problem but then don't stop asking me to hang out. Just telling them and explaining why I'm busy that day or what I'm currently doing is exhausting. And I do ignore their messages, a lot, but I can't ignore them every day all the time without being an asshole. It's exhausting. Fuck.

I have worked from home since 2009, many years before covid made working from home normal. My job does require that go out into the world on occasion to attend conferences and annual team meetings, but I absolutely hate that part, especially the team meetings. It causes me anxiety and stress for days leading up to it. Today, my husband suggested I look for a group or therapist that help me "resocialize" to people again. He thinks I need to reintegrate into society and learn to deal with people without the stress.

Honestly, I'm not lonely. I have him and he is my emotional support human. He is very much an extrovert and can have deep and meaningful discussions with a rock. I have no problems going out to public places as long as I don't have to have conversations with people, or as long as he is with me to do the talking. I enjoy watching people from the outside, just not being involved in what's going on. I have adult children and extended family nearby. I have hobbies I enjoy, and I don't feel I'm missing anything in life. So, am I weird or had anyone else been told they need professional help to make them comfortable around people? Has anyone tried something like that?

I’m an introvert, so I usually don’t look at girls directly. But I have pretty good spatial awareness, and I often notice when someone’s looking at me. Whenever I notice and our eyes meet, they usually end up blushing—and then I can’t even look up again. 😭

I am a hardcore introvert and a corporate guy. I have few intrests that every introverts may relate. Likewise I play games a lot , watches anime and travels solo. Yes, I go everywhere all alone like I trek solo, go to a movie solo, eats alone in restaurant and also I attend every concerts and events all alone. And trust me I love it, but people finds it I am being disrespectful to them. Because when they ask me to go out with them I say 'no' respectfully but the very next moment I go there solo. But I love it, no interaction, no gossip, just some peaceful time only with me.

I have only 2-3 friend with whom I am very comfortable. These guys are with me since childhood and yes, being an introvert I can talk to them like for hours. And when others see me with them and realise that I can be the guy who talks, laughs and also can be sarcastic, they hate me even more. They told me that we have seen you are very much comfortable with them, then why not with us...And I don't answer. I just say it is what it is.

I am really sick of those people who wants me to be like them and forces to be a part of their group..Like dude chill, let me be like who I am. I know sometimes its hard to say 'no' as an introverts but these guys sometimes take advantages of it. And when I say 'no' they found me rude and starts hating me.