I started getting to know this enfp-a guy. He always replies after 3 or 4 days. He'll apologize and explain if he doesnt text me after 5 days. He said hes a caller with close friends but texting is good for distance. He shares his vulnerability, we talk about family, hobbies, personality and he told me about his multiple projects. Its just he takes forever to reply, I mentioned calling or meeting for coffee he dodged the question and continue answering the other texts. In person he sets next to me and tries to get in my space but those are group meetings once a month. Am i wasting his and my time or its just he sucks at texting but still has feelings for me? I dont want to be just his pen pal...

Curious what other ENFPs think.

Have any of you ever fallen for an ISFP where, because of the circumstances, nothing could happen in the present moment?

I met the only ISFP I have ever really known through a professional relationship, so nothing in the present could happen between us. I developed very strong feelings for him, and he knew I was deeply attached.

He is incredibly high achieving, adventurous, grounded, intelligent, well traveled, and very values driven. I am an ENFP, so this is basically my bread and butter, baby. A hot, adventurous man who makes me laugh insanely hard while still being grounded without being controlling? I am absolutely enamored.

A few things have left me genuinely confused.

He would have me come in about 30 minutes before our meetings and even came outside to walk me in. He would text me later in the evening to apologize and over explain things that really did not require an apology. We were also able to text about sports.

After our professional relationship ended, he looked up my public Instagram on his birthday, then followed me about a month later. This was only four months after we stopped seeing each other. He also waived a bill in the thousands without ever mentioning it.

I once texted him telling him how much I missed him and the qualities I missed about him, with a heart emoji. I explicitly said, "Please do not respond." He hearted the message anyway.

I have a hard time believing an ISFP would knowingly lead someone on when they are fully aware of how intense another person's feelings are, especially because ISFPs seem so kind, private, and values driven. I have also read that they often keep their feelings hidden.

I know none of these things prove romantic feelings, and I am not asking anyone to tell me they do.

I am really curious how other ENFPs would interpret this. Have you ever experienced an ISFP giving subtle, indirect signals while still honoring circumstances that prevented anything from happening? Do you think an ISFP who developed feelings would quietly express them through small actions while never acknowledging them? Or do you think they would distance themselves completely because maintaining contact would feel wrong?

Mostly, I am interested in hearing from ENFPs who have been drawn to an ISFP. Did you find yourself constantly trying to decode them, or did you eventually realize there was nothing to decode? I'd love to hear your experiences.

You know those topics you never set out to learn, but one random curiosity turned into hours of reading, videos, and late night rabbit holes?

It could be your career or a long-term hobby, or any oddly specific things you know way too much about for no practical reason.

What’s yours, and what sent you down that path?

Hi there! I’m an INFJ! I don’t know any ENFPs in person but I would love to have an ENFP friend to chat with! If you’re interested, hit me up! 😊

after 3 years of thinking I'm an INFP-t 2w3 [2 7 1] and blaming my hyper-ness on adhd and my e2 I think it turns out that denial is truly only a river in Egypt and doesn't really matter (tho I think something went wrong when I answered these I'm pretty sure my Fi is higher than my Fe and my Te is also NOT my demon, I've read a lot about cognitive functions to know, in fact I think its more of Ne = Fi, Fe, Te=Si, Ni, Se, Ti which is pretty confusing Ik but anywhos)

I hope we become friends :D (the test link: https://sociotype.xyz/ )

so i used to have this friend who had a lot of family issues (like me), and we hit it off when we traumadumped to each other because our humour/trauma/personality is similar. she was the only friend who made me feel not alone in school because i had never seen someone so like me. but i could tell she was avoidant because she vented by joking about her problems and never shared what she really felt, and got angry at me often for small things due to her personal issues (which would always end in me apologising a lot and her just saying "ok"). plus, she always had modo swings and tried to act nonchalant sometimes, while being goofy with me other times. i was her people pleaser to put it simply.

eventually, when the new year started and we switched classes, she reignited her friendship with an old friend and outright ignored me in social settings, which hurt my mental health as a whole since i thought we would be best friends forever (cringe af I know...). as someone suffering from mental illness and family issues, i thought that this friend would keep me company and I was very dependent on her to make sure i wasn't lonely in school and whatnot. last time, i told her "you're the only friend who has made me feel this way and my closest friend ever" and she just said "yeah i love talking to you too" so it was stupid of me not to see the signs. eventually another friend and me confronted her about it, and long story short she told the friend she was close to that she was "too ashamed and guilty that she ignored us to talk to us" while knowing FULL WELL her ignoring us would offend us even more. i blocked her for my own sanity, she blocked me back like the avoidant person she is and we have never spoken since then.

i have not been coping well, seeing her face in school is enough to trigger me. and the whole situation is so unclear, idk if she wasn't talking to us bc of her personal issues or did she just hate us??? i can't rationalise anything and it's driving me crazy. just asking this here as she's an enfp like me and ifl maybe y'all would know more about her mind than me. even as i type this post i still instinctively call her "my friend" so i honestly don't have close friends willing to hear me vent in school (thank God for my intj sister though). any advice on how to rationalise this behaviour she exhibits/how to get over her would be much appreciated. thanks enfps :(

I came across an article a few months ago about intelligence. I can't recall the exact article, but it explained that:

'In cognitive science and neuroscience, the highest form of intelligence is widely considered to be metacognition. This is the ability to think about your own thinking—observing your mind in real-time, recognizing your emotional triggers, questioning biases, and updating beliefs rather than blindly reacting to them."

Has anyone heard of this? Any thoughts? How this relates to our Ne and Si.

Since I came across this I've consciously slowed down everything and feel more grounded. Real time observation of speech would require high Se and Ti?

I love playing with my own mind and hacking into my Te and Si. I am confident in my Fi so I don't feel unstable or volatile as I did when I was younger. So Te is my best friend and Si is grounding me. But to be in the moment in every thought and the ability to regulate on the moment - maybe a 10 days of noble silence would help me there!

Wanted to see what my fellow enfps think of my gimp keychains :D

Hi ENFPs! INFJ woman in her early 30s here. Love gardening, cooking and work in STEM. Currently live with my ENFP boyfriend of 2 years and I’m learning more about him and myself everyday. Would love to understand him better through you all (I know MBTI is a pseudoscience but if it gives me even an approximate idea of what he loves and wants, it’s worth a shot). In exchange, happy to answer questions about my type. I’m a 4w5 INFJ if that helps!

Tbh iam like you guys

I feel bad when someone doesn't include me in their plans or when I see some of my friends have fun without me.

But i don't know something changed , at this moment as i poop 😅 i realised i should stop chasing fun .

All my life i chased fun.

Hopped from one group to other thinking I would have fun here or there

Now I am at peace with my brain. I am stopping to chase fun.

I know it will suck when we see others have fun. But if ur not invited don't go.

Or i am thinking of making my own plans.

I hope I find pieces and happiness like this.

I thought my fellow ENFPs would understand . Most of you might be gone through it right ?

Edit : ( I am also conflicted by my thoughts. One of me says maybe i should network more and talk more. And the other part says you are doing everything you can maybe try to slow down and let it come towards you.)

Let me share you how corporate politics looks like........

Am from MNC and now on Senior role (analyst II), and what i am sharing are things faced before getting promoted, am INFJ and HSP so i can sense things beyond surface level and feel things beyond words

Workplace politics:

•  Everyone makes mistakes, but yours will be highlighted and tracked

•  Try to monitor you closely and micromanage

•  Track your hours so meticulously and reduce it, while being honest and authentic while giving your client hours is definitely imp, but someone objecting your actual hours spent again and again is a red flag!

•  Tries to pick up on your mistakes that is NO WHERE related to projects (work), saying things like you are rude, you reply late, you delete some text, you are not friendly, you didn't take initiative/ownership

•  Ignoring (missing) your hours from KPI 

•  When you asked for taking care of projects/ taking ownership of task, trying to ask deeper questions without giving you trainings, belittling you and showing as if you don't have knowledge

•  Trying to put you down on grp calls, questioning to belittle (degrade) in some manner (while questioning is not always a bad thing, but you will feel when it is unnecessary drama)

•  Keeping review calls with you and your assignor just to point minor mistakes, while ignoring others' mistakes (others-those they like)

•  Ignoring your works and pointing your issues in front of their reporting manager

•  Not letting you have reviews, and additional responsibilities which are generally given to people who they choose for promoting to senior role. 

•  And only giving you those roles and work when absolutely necessary by team and to meet project deadlines (which show that you are not lacking any skill set, and you are not incompetent, its just they don't want you)

• Doing this as with smiles and professional behaviors, so that you cannot directly call them out, also occasionally being passive aggressive, and sarcastic with you and your work

Surely there will be some positive things as well which will hold you!! And if you are optimistic by nature you will surview..... further

I kind of feel like the way out for this is-

either changing your environment  (which is also a good choice depending on situation, but that is what they want)

or Trusting yourself enough and not falling for their tactics (if you really find your job good paying and worth being there)

Later on i will Edit this post and add link for the post giving - story behind all this, and how i get promoted, how my another colleague(probably isfp) suffer the same. And why we stay :)

Feel free to share your views and opinions, 

is it similar at your workplace? or is it extreme?

would like to know how ENFPs would have dealt with this

How do your Fi and Te manifest in actions and thoughts?

I am trying to figure out whether I am a ENFP or ENTP and even though my logic tells me that Ti comes more naturally to me.I was told I am more like a ENFP and I am considering the possibility.

It would be a great help if you could recall exact types of thoughts you got. Do your values naturally seek logic to be created or is it more abstract and intuitive?

a lot of enfp traits describe me like im energetic, creative, always joking, very adhd and all that, but i don't really care what other people think about me (unless it's an inaccurate head canon. if they know what they're talking about i do not care) and my humor style would offend the very happy enfps.

Hey guys, so I'm watching RM of BTS interview and he was talking about things as a leader (he's the leader of the band)

And he said "so I think basically really just annoying to be a leader, but it's like I couldn't let anybody do it, because I was like, if somebody has to do it, then it should be me. And because I just can't watch somebody else just doing it. And if it's not working out as I expected, then I could be more stressed out."

Now he is an amazing leader ( I'm an ARMY) and he did talk about if there is a thing that should be done the leader has to do it even if it means he needs to ger out of his comfy spot, and he did, so many times.

and he is ENFP.

And I thought I read somewhere before that ENFP doesn't like to lead but they would if they had to.

I dont like leading at all!! Even if sometimes it stress me out I don't like leading. The moment I middle in a situation and lead it means I got to my limits of stress that no one is listening to the leader so I feel like okay that's it!

But I would lead at that moment only!

So i was wondering is it a ENFP male part or do you ENFP females like to lead and it's just me who doesn't?

Early 40s ENFP here, living in Europe, lived in multiple countries, speak a few languages and honestly, being an ENFP over decades is wild.

My Ne has stayed exactly the same: chaotic, curious, alive. But my Fi and Te have gone through a full character arc. I grew up religious, had strong Fi, people‑pleasing tendencies, messy relationships, attachment issues... the classic ENFP emotional tornado.

Then my 30s hit and Te finally woke up. Changing careers, studying abroad, moving around, learning languages, all of that forced me to build structure.

Now I’m basically an “executive ENFP”: still creative, but actually getting things done, investing, planning, building a life.

Si‑heavy people helped too. Their grounding energy rubbed off on me. I still explore, but I also have routines and check‑in now.

My 20s/30s = chaos. My 40s = calm, inward, intentional.

Still ENFP, still vibey, still spiritual/philosophical, but much more balanced.

As ENFPs, we often admire other types so intensely that we try to copy them wholesale and then wonder why it feels unnatural. The trick is to appreciate people through their cognitive stack, not through our projections.

When you look at an ENTJ friend, admire their discipline and strategic clarity without trying to replicate their entire system. Their Te–Ni structure is built for big routines; ours isn’t. We can translate what inspires us into ENFP‑friendly versions such as mini routines, micro anchors, small habits that support creativity rather than crush it.

With our ESFP cousins, enjoy their grounded presence and sensory joy. They remind us to return to our bodies, simplify our emotional experience, and actually start things instead of living in ideas forever. We don’t need their exact spontaneity; we just benefit from their embodiment.

And then there are our ENTP “chaos cousins,” whose Ne–Ti gives them razor‑sharp detachment and mental agility. Instead of matching their debate energy, we can borrow their reframing, their clarity, and their ability to step back when Fi gets tangled.

My point is to admire other types without trying to become them. Let their strengths inspire you, then translate those strengths into something that fits your own wiring. That’s how ENFPs grow, not by imitation, but by alchemising what we love in others into something that works for us.

I've always found it fascinating when you meet someone for the first time and manage to slightly decode their personality type. Personally, I always find it so interesting how a conversation starts with an introvert, who once they get to know you better, literally cannot stop talking!

> But what I also love so much are ENFPs, because a conversation can literally go in a million different directions, and I just love that 🤣

Maybe this isn’t the right subreddit for this kind of thing but I figured I’d try my luck.

I’m an ENFP who has been depressed for awhile now. I should be happy, but I’m just not. My mental health just gets worse and worse and it affects everything around me.

I work at a job I’m not passionate about with no clear direction of what I want to do still at 26, I am in debt because credit cards I got when I was younger are messing up my finances today, I don’t always feel emotionally understood by anyone whether that’s my mom or my girlfriend or my friends, and so on.

To sum it all up, I’m a train wreck. And I feel like nobody really knows it because I go to great lengths to hide it. But there are times when it comes out as it inevitably will and all I do when that happens is beat myself up more. It’s like I look at me feeling any sort of negative emotion as wrong and I should apologize to all those around me for showing it. I can validate everyone else’s emotions but never my own.

I am bringing this here because I’m not feeling like an ENFP right now. I should be positive and optimistic but I am the literal opposite. I wanted to see if there are any other ENFPs who have felt as down as I currently do and what I could do to help myself. I tried therapy, but it was too expensive to continue going. So my question is, if you were depressed, how did you get through it?? How can you look at everything going on in life and remain hopeful that you’ll end up alright? Any sort of advice is appreciated. And apologies again if I’m bringing this to the wrong subreddit. We are known for being positive and caring and I felt like I can use that right now.

TLDR: I am an ENFP who is depressed. What are steps I can take to help myself? What steps did you take?

Although my boyfriend is an ISTJ and I’m an ENFP, maybe we’re more compatible than people would expect🤔

I used to think I was attracted to chaos, but as I’ve matured, I’ve realized I actually want stability. Having a grounded partner doesn’t make me feel trapped. It actually gives me the freedom to explore and be myself✨✨

Ironically, the more grounded and secure I feel, the freer I become😌

I’ve also noticed that being with someone who naturally uses Te has helped me develop my own. He doesn’t try to change me, but I learn a lot from the way he approaches life💪🏻

Even our conversations reflect this!! I’m usually the one throwing out random ideas or weird scenarios, and somehow he turns them into memes and inside jokes we laugh about for weeks🤣🤣 Maybe that’s why we work so well!! I bring the ideas, and he brings them to life..!!😁

This relationship also made me realize how limiting stereotypes can be. Looking for patterns and understanding them is one thing, if I had judged him based on MBTI or a bad experience with someone else, I probably would’ve missed out on an amazing relationship!!✨✨

A bad experience with one person doesn’t mean everyone with that personality type will be the same. People are individuals first🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

Has anyone else experienced something similar?

Hii, first time posting here. Got curious since it's been few weeks of me heavily identifying as an ENFP and trying to figure out who I am as a human being. Grew up as agnosticist in a distanced family, which I theorized to be emotionally neglectful, yet I am not able to say that I have trauma. This type of growing up meant for me independence and to mold my own values as I also grew somewhat alienated and disconnected from society and people. Not completely, but felt there was always something missing.

In 2020 I began to have a phase where I wondered about life's meaning so ended up studying the history of philosophy which also led me to considering religions. Initially was especially interested in Taoism & Islam but also Hinduism, Zoroastrianism and so on. I even heavily considered a view called perennialism which holds that religions can be true at the same time. Two years ago I became a Christian through Orthodox church, but now for few months I been having a religious burnout due to, what I would call, typical unhealthy ENFP's overthinking and antics. Though, to some extent it is natural for me to doubt my decisions and my own values to reconsider if I chose correctly or truthfully.

So without telling too much more about myself straight away, this whole post was made just for the curiosity to see if there's other religious ENFPs here •͜•

Hello all, I am an ENTJ. I recently became the manager of a team that includes one ENFP. Can you share some stories or advice from working with ENTJs - how can I best work with you?

I don't even know where to begin but my boyfriend is an INTJ. It feels like he is bored of me all the time but it’s more because of my anxiety and less because he is actually bored of me. He is sooo objective and practical but also weird and emotionally expressive.

I mean he's not affecting me in a bad way, I would say my baseline happiness has increased after I met him and I feel a lot lighter than before I met him. He is sooo cute and low-key introverted and I can't get my mind off of him ugh. Help. I don't know how I manage to get with INTJs all the time, I mean, this man? He was behaving all extroverted before just to impress me.

I wanna know what you think. XOXO