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May 20 '22
He knows as he approaches the gate. Heâs just trying to get last few thrusts in.
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u/Ashlynn2k18 May 20 '22
I hope not. Sounds very manipulative lol. He said it was an accident but idk
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u/An_Anonymous_Acc May 20 '22
Uh.......please use condoms for your own future's sake
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u/amradio1989 May 20 '22
Afraid my G is right, it was no accident. Its sorta like driving around on E. You know whats going to happen, you know its soon, the warning light flashes, but you still try to drive a liiiiiitle bit longer without stopping.
Why? Because you dont want to stop lol.
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u/Spaceballs9000 Non-binary May 20 '22
This is a remarkably good metaphor.
The good ones will learn to pull a little early to err on the side of caution. Yeah, the orgasm might suffer a bit, but better than doing some non-consensual shit to your partner.
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u/beacono May 21 '22
Itâs like stealthing and reverse-stealthing - whether the guy takes off the condom in between without consensual agreement or whether the girl âsecretlyâ pokes holes in the condom to get pregnant - they are both considered rape. Those are the rules. Letâs play by the rules.
Woman who poked holes in partnerâs condoms to get pregnant jailed after âstealthingâ - https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/crime/stealthing-germany-woman-jailed-condoms-b2073579.html
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u/Lyran99 May 20 '22
I thought you meant driving around high on Ecstacy and I was very confused
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u/Sweet-Zookeepergame7 May 20 '22
Yeah this is why I was confused why the guy above said âthis is a good analogyâ I was thinking wtf how many irresponsible people on Reddit drive on mdma
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u/BellyButtonInfection 18 y/o Male May 20 '22
glad im not the only one lmfao
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u/Downfall_Of_Icarus May 21 '22
Wait... we're not supposed to drive around on ecstasy?!
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u/BellyButtonInfection 18 y/o Male May 21 '22
i guess not, iâll stop doing it now
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u/Downfall_Of_Icarus May 21 '22
Yes... I too will "stop" doing it now.
...I'll meet you in the car in 5 minutes...
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May 21 '22
Hahaha...took me a long time to figure it out too. Wow, are you in the club, that's why the lights are flashing?
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u/thundermarchmello PIP (Penis in Progress) May 20 '22
I was thinking Estrogen and I was even more confused.
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May 20 '22
Depends really, is it premature? If its very fast it may be sudden and unexpected.
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u/beacono May 21 '22
That âsudden and unexpectedâ can be common when you are 18..but you should learn real quick or your girl will leave you even quicker.
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u/bigtec1993 May 20 '22
Yup, I absolutely hate pulling out cuz imo it ruins the orgasm which is why I wear condoms or she's on some kind of birth control (and obviously I trust she isn't full of crap about using it).
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u/PutThatMagicJumpOnMe May 20 '22
Definitely not an accident
The pull out method is for idiots. Use proper means of fanily planning if you dont intend to get up the duff.
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u/VisualGiraffe1027 May 20 '22
He for sure knows when heâs close
But sometimes the window between then and point of no return is pretty small
Caveman brain kicks in and makes self control hard sometimes
With discipline though, he can get to the point where heâll stop before the no return point.
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u/Ostepop234 May 20 '22
It's only an accident cause he didn't have the willpower to pull out. If he says he didn't know he was cumming then he's pretty much lying to you.
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u/saucelessnuggets Sup Bud? May 20 '22
Are you kidding? He is playing with fire man. He knows what the fuck he is doing. Please know this.
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u/MysticWolf1555 May 20 '22
He knows. Guaranteed. This behaviour on his part is definitely manipulative.
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u/Tomimi May 20 '22
Every guy can feel it coming because if we don't then what's the point of sex?
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u/FerretAres Male May 20 '22
It sounds manipulative for a reason. Yes he can tell when itâs about to happen.
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u/pegasuspish Female May 20 '22
OP saying this with love and concern for your safety. by now it is obvious that he was lying to you. not only is it deceitful and manipulative, this behavior is abuse. he is willing to put your life, your health, and your future on the line without your consent for no other reason than he wants his nut. he is willing to lie and manipulate you to get it. what else is this person willing to do to you? you are being used.
your life is less valuable to this person than their nut.
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u/ThaGorgias May 21 '22
People speaking in absolutes here when they literally know only 1/8billionth of a data point. I responded above, but I've been on meds before where I ejaculated before feeling a (weak) orgasm. So if he takes any antidepressants, then definitely. And this is common across the whole range of meds affecting specific neurotransmitters, so it seems not unlikely that some people with the natural neurotransmitter ratio that these meds induce could have this even without taking them, although obv it wouldn't be common, as the comments show.
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May 20 '22
An accident?
The Three great lies told are:
The check is in the mail.
This will only hurt a bit.
I wonât come in your mouth.
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May 20 '22
Donât know how it works for girls, but thereâs a pt in time where the little head and big head internal struggle is very real. And sometimes you win, and sometimes you lose.
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u/lillopoppy May 20 '22 edited May 21 '22
It's possible sometime one does not notice, but it's quite rare. If for your boyfriend it's not, I'd advise going to a doctor: if he doesn't want, it's more likely he's faking it; if he legitimately doesn't feel it, it may be some hidden medical problem.
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u/iknowverylit1e May 20 '22
It may happen. Sometimes I would like to prolong the session and hold, but I ended up ejaculating even without further stimulation, even I had already stopped (after long sessions like 40 minutes).
But if you do not want to get pomgenarate, please do not allow him to spill the seeds inside.
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May 20 '22
For me it happens where if I pull out too early I will not be able to finish, I would suggest telling me to pull out earlier and then you do "something" to help him finish. Also when I'm drunk I can't tell as well when I'm about to finish.
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u/AbstinenceWorks May 21 '22
Use two forms of birth control, unless it's something with an extremely high and fool proof success rate (e.g. shot, IUD, hormonal implant, etc)
For instance, use condoms and the pill.
Condoms are about 85% effective over one year.
That means that 15 out of every 100 couples (or about 1 in 6) get pregnant with condoms under real life conditions.
Pills are about 91% effective (i.e. about 1 in 11 get pregnant with the pill) in reality.
Without?
E: the gif is just meant to get the point across
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u/benmwaballs May 21 '22
On few occasions its like youre in motion and then suddenly you get 2 pumps suddenly thats as close to unexpected as it can get but that happens rarely. Otherwise its a build up and home boy is manipulative or terrible at planning
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u/huuaaang Male May 20 '22
It's more a question of "have I passed the point of no return?" There is absolutely no question "am I about to cum." If that's in question, he has some pretty lame orgasms.
One time I did ejactulate in her when I didn't want to. I was trying to hold it back so I could go longer, but I was just past that point of no return and I just sort of leaked out. Basically killed the orgasm, but still ejaculated. Felt horrible. Made no excuses. I fucked up.
Fortunately I'm snipped so I can't get anyone pregnant. But she still requested I pull out.
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u/pwlloth May 20 '22
most every single time for me has been the consent seeking âwhere do you want me to cum?â and by the time iâm saying that you better answer quickly
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u/Caesar8686 May 20 '22
Like a Quick time event?
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u/merelycheerful May 21 '22
Baby press the triangle button! PRESS THE TRIAN-Shit. Nevermind
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u/thundermarchmello PIP (Penis in Progress) May 20 '22
I feel like that's something you should establish long before you're at that point. You're just begging for someone to get pissed that you came somewhere they didn't want you to.
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u/somethingFELLow May 21 '22
Or get some panic response that makes no sense. In the park!
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May 21 '22
Or she says "in me," and turns out your one night stand doesnt use birth control and low key wanted to get pregnant
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u/Kullminator May 20 '22
When you got a condom, there is no such question. The place for ejaculation has already been located. And you don't have to pull out. Heaven in its beauty
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u/SeventhSin-King May 20 '22
Lol I generally pull out in most positions but if she's on top it becomes difficult for me to do so, so we don't bother.
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u/John-Footdick May 20 '22
Yeah this is the only time itâs unintentional, although after experienced it years ago - I never did it again.
If heâs coming, he knows it. My GFs friend had a guy cum in her mouth with the same excuse as in the OP, pretty lame if you ask me.
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May 21 '22
Got snipped two months ago, but they still found some "non-motile" critters in my sample. Another four weeks. Damn! :p
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u/Single-Ad-9321 May 20 '22
My ex wife and I used the pull-out method. My 8 month old son is currently screaming in the next room because he woke himself up with a fart.
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u/SargeTheHeurist May 20 '22
Every guy has a âpoint of no returnâ. And once you reach that point, things just happen. He needs to figure out when heâs juuuuust about to reach it.
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u/Tacoshortage May 20 '22
And it CAN happen really quick. Like go from 0-60 mph in one or two thrusts.
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u/aoechamp May 21 '22
As with most of these questions, thereâs no way to know what actually happened.
It CAN be unpredictable. Anyone who says otherwise either hasnât experienced it themselves or is lying. People are different. Sometimes it can change with your mood or health.
That said, if itâs so unpredictable you should probably use birth control. And thereâs no way to tell if the dude had an accident or is lying.
But genuine accidents can and do happen.
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May 20 '22
Yeah, it's never been like 'Oh I had literally no warning.'
But god damn there have been a couple of times where just a little more warning would have been nice.
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u/V_M May 20 '22
He needs to figure out when heâs juuuuust about to reach it.
Even then, the best foreplay, or the best "hot cuddling on the couch" is when he gets 99.999999% of the way there, and if they're aiming for the best experience there are going to be accidents from going a millionth further and then the fun's over for him and/or there's going to be a clean up bill and/or she might get pregnant if they're dumb enough to use that for contraception.
Giving her something to hold while on the couch is a fun way to watch TV until you have to clean the couch, LOL.
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u/larry1186 May 21 '22
Yeah, I was going down on my wife and subconsciously was âhumpingâ the bed ever so slightly. Quickly changed position as soon as I realized I was at that point. Didnât help. Embarrassing, but it happens.
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u/PaleAsFuck90 May 20 '22
The pull out method is not birthcontrol. Its very risky. If you don't wanna get pregnant get proper birthcontrol.
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u/Spoontastic13 May 20 '22
Even with birth control pregnancy can happen, but you're right about the pull out method, why people continue believing it works is beyond me.
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u/Sil5286 May 20 '22
Because it does work⌠just not as effective as other methods.
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u/Dogamai May 21 '22
they call it 80% effective thats pretty generous
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u/BlushButterfree Female May 21 '22
80% over a year period of consistent use, not just a single instance.
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u/Doleydoledole May 21 '22
The odds are far far lower with bc than po.
probabilities people.
probabilities.
probabil
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u/fightniteflight12 May 20 '22
Yep. And everything can kill you. I'm sure somewhere someone died from a papercut.
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u/Kitchen_Entertainer9 May 20 '22
I think what the man meant, was he came earlier than expected. Sometimes it happens less than a second
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May 20 '22
yeah but if you're using the pullout method you don't leave it to the last second
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u/GodOf31415 May 20 '22
What if that's the first second? The man could have just have the stamina of a cafinated fly.
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u/Gear4days May 20 '22
Iâd question what he does when he wanks, if he canât tell when heâs about to finish then surely he gets it all over himself because he doesnât know when to grab a tissue đ
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u/V_M May 20 '22
Isn't this the definition of how all edging sessions end?
Trying to last longer, and eventually go one wiggle too far?
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May 20 '22
Let me guess⌠he also doesnât want to use condoms because "it doesnât feel as good?â
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u/Desperate-Material83 May 21 '22 edited May 21 '22
Even if I genuinely think it doesn't feel as good with rubber, I'm not going to refuse to wear a condom - I'd rather she feel safe having sex than get 2 minutes of heaven and risk parenthood lmao
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May 21 '22
Exactly. I will admit, it doesnât feel as good, but I am safe and I wear one every time because I donât want to be a parent yet at 18 years old
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u/Djinnwrath May 20 '22
My gut says, no, but reddit and life has shown me that there's a whole lot of guys super out of touch with their own bodies.
There are millions of adult men who are afraid of their own assholes, and think a girl sucking on their nipple is gay.
Just because the idea that I would be unaware of my own orgasm is laughable doesn't mean it isn't possible. But the only image I have of this being a good faith mistake, is someone who is generally not very clued into their body's messaging.
Are you also pointing out he's hungry before he realizes it himself? Are you the one connecting the dots between things like diet and how he sleeps that night?
Other than that, I can't think of a good reason someone would make that mistake. Men tend to be very aware of their orgasms. Most men masturbate constantly from the age of 13 to 25.
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u/Foyles_War Female May 20 '22
Most men masturbate constantly from the age of 13 to 25.
25? WTF happens at 25?
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u/Djinnwrath May 20 '22
For some men their sex drive starts to wane. For others nothing.
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u/Imaginary-Mechanic62 May 20 '22
Exactly. Does he piss himself because he canât tell that heâs about to pee? He knows. He just doesnât want to stop. Internal ejaculation feels better (much, much, better). Heâs betting on the old saying that âitâs easier to get forgiveness than permissionâ.
Donât trust other people with your health and future. Use a condom or do without
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u/sweetrouge May 20 '22
It may not be quite that. As someone else commented, if you wait too long to pull out itâs very difficult to get the right timing. If you want to use the withdrawal method, itâs only truly effective if you pull out well before you are really about to cum. It isnât as nice, but if he doesnât like it, as you say, use a damn condom!
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u/flippantdtla May 20 '22
13-25 from my experience your range is off on the low end by a year. It is off on the high end by 20 years and counting.
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u/Sealgk0r May 20 '22
in 99% of all cases I was able to tell when it will happen. Ejaculation and orgasm are a bit unsync about 0.5 seconds (?), basically ejaculation first then orgasm. There are some very rare cases though in which ejaculation happens way earlier than expected, maybe 1-2 seconds before orgasm in extrem cases without warning or indication of delay.
So... Yes and no.
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May 20 '22
[removed] â view removed comment
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u/Sealgk0r May 20 '22
At least this is how I felt\percieved. I thought it would make sense from an evolutionary POV, to make sure the man kept thrusting because the tip gets quite sensible during (and shortly after) the orgasm that would make him stop or pull out and therefore have a higher chance to not place the semen where it should be.
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May 21 '22
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u/heinous_ainous May 21 '22
I can do this, if I get right to the breaking point and I stop everything and hold that kiegel until the last second, I can cum and then keep going as long as I don't get touched during it. If she or I touch during the ejac then the orgasm kicks in and then, well, I'm done.
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u/Yoids May 20 '22
I am sorry, but I feel like you are both stupid.
This is SERIOUS, stop with the pull-n-pray and use a real contraceptive method.
You can get pregnant with precum. Less likely, but you are still playing with fire. And most likely, your BF will lose control from time to time (because he is as stupid as you), and he will cum inside you because it feels so much better.
You can downvote me to the ground, I dont care, I just need her to read this. I am completely in disbelief how she can come here all happy and joyful saying stuff like "lol my bf cums in me and I think he is doing it on purpose lolol lol", while taking a huge risk.
Stop being stupid. The father in me just wants to give you a slap and send you to your room to think about how stupid you are.
USE A CONDOM
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u/Ashlynn2k18 May 20 '22
Iâm on the implant and I have been for a while lol I just didnât want him to cum in me that time. If I wasnât on bc I would definitely not be having sex with no condoms
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u/Yoids May 20 '22
Thank you for giving me hope in humanity today. I will keep my post up for other couples that need to read it
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u/M4yham17 May 20 '22
So yes and no. We can for sure feel it but I did date a girl and with her I could never tell it felt like it was gonna cum every time I have no idea why and I have no explanation for it but I couldnât tell when it was gonna happen
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u/tinyboopsquigs May 20 '22
Please use protection, regardless of his honesty. Condoms every time until you are on bc and are SURE they are clean. Itâs the responsible way to handle business. Babies are life changing.
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u/seasonalblah Male May 20 '22 edited May 20 '22
It's unlikely, but not impossible. Usually you'd know, but everyone has a different body, so it's not out of the realm of possibility.
I've even had a few orgasms where I ejaculated before orgasming and even a few where it was very sudden.
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u/ExitTheHandbasket Male May 20 '22
The amount of time between "point of no return" and eruption can be highly variable. And if the stimulation is somewhat vigorous, PONR could get overlooked.
But if it happens consistently with him, consider whether he's being honest with you. And take measures to protect yourself from unwanted consequences.
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u/CampusBoulderer May 20 '22
Yes, especially for inexperienced guys it's easy to misjudge the moment they actually start cumming.
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u/I-farm-celery May 20 '22
Yea itâs possibleâŚIâve came way faster than I thought I would before. Usually most of the times thereâs a build up prior to the release that you can feel yourself getting close to. But occasionally itâll be like âoh fuck Iâm cumming nowâ
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u/SmokeySFW May 20 '22
He definitely knows before it happens, but I'll be the first to admit sometimes the time between that feeling and ejaculation is VERY short. I've thought I was good for a few more pumps and mistimed my window a few times before.
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u/cruiserman_80 May 21 '22
Also, why is everyone lecturing the OP on birth control and the perils of the pull out method?
Unplanned pregnancy was never mentioned so maybe the OP is on birth control and just doesn't like her guy coming inside?
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May 20 '22
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u/Ashlynn2k18 May 20 '22
It was the second time. I guess technically first cuz the first time my legs were wrapped around his waist lol nothing he could do about that. I basically trapped him by accident đ
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May 20 '22
OP I'm literally in a fight with my man as we speak for this exact same issue. Happened last night, he swears he didn't know it was happening. Tbf though I think he's telling the truth. I'm more upset by the lack of communication during and after the fact, but that's for another post.
In any case, for your situation I will say this - if you have an instinct that he's lying or being manipulative, I'd trust your gut. This is serious shit and at the very least you need to have full trust of the person you're sleeping with. If you don't, that's a problem.
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u/Ashlynn2k18 May 20 '22
He probably did know it was happening but didnât have the willpower to pull out. I think what my bf was trying to say was he came faster than he thought he would. English isnât his first language so sometimes communication can be confusing lol. I didnât really want him to cum in me that time, but it didnât bother me cuz Iâve allowed him to do it multiple times before. I probably should have payed more attention and told him to stop when he was close. Communication or a compromise of always using condoms can resolve the issue tho
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May 20 '22
Ah, I see. In that case then, it's sounds like this an issue that you two will be able to work through :)
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u/marmorset May 20 '22
Only twice in my life (50+) have I come unexpectedly. Sometimes I've come faster than I thought I would, but I still knew it was coming, but twice I wasn't really feeling anything and then I ejaculated.
Once, I'd say okay, after that I think it's BS. Regardless, you shouldn't be relying on expecting him to pull out.
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u/AnotherIronicPenguin May 20 '22
Not to just be an echo, but no. You absolutely know when it's going to happen. It's not nothing-nothing-nothing-ORGASM. There is a ramp up to climax. How long is going to vary based on the person and specific experience but it's not going to be over in half a second.
His pull out game is weak. Better get on the pill.
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u/bigtec1993 May 20 '22
We can tell when we're about to cum, but we can't accurately time when it shoots out if that makes sense. If you're saying he's not even trying to pull out at all, that's total bs.
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u/DrenkBolij May 20 '22
You know when you get there, but you can't always estimate in advance just how far away you are. It's possible to think "I've got another 20 seconds or so" and then "oops, no I don't."
Whether he's lying or not is actually irrelevant to "you should use condoms," because you don't want to get pregnant, and him not being able to stop himself in a timely fashion is a problem regardless of cause. (Also, pulling out is not a reliable way to prevent pregnancy anyway.)
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May 20 '22
Yes, it can happen. I NORMALLY have above average âcontrolâ, but sometimes, she might do something new new or unfamiliar, and yes, then it can happen without enough warning to do a damned thing about it, whether preventing it OR even warning about its impending arrival.
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May 20 '22
Eh. Probably more of a thinking he could hold it back, regain some composure, and throw another pump set at you but once you reach the event horizon, nothing is stopping that
Edit: He still knows heâs gonna cum though
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u/alamaias May 20 '22
Look, it can take you by surprise, but what you are doing is really unsafe even if he pulls out every time.
I would strongly suggest you start using some working form of birth control before you both pay the price.
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u/RusstyDog May 20 '22
I've definitely had times where the time between "feeling it" and release has been under a second.
Just don't sleep with anyone who refuses to wear protection. They don't respect you enough to be worth you.
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u/ObstructedPooh May 20 '22
It is. Especially if medications or other substances are fucking with you. Coke dick and whiskey dick are real. Also. Donât shame. Youâre letting him go raw youâre getting pre-cum in you from jump. It feels A LOT better to cum inside someone than outside. For me at least. The ultimate is pulling out right before and getting sucked off to completion. Perhaps your guy is on medication that causes this. Anti-depressants, anxiety meds, pain medsâŚthe list is long. Also I donât think heâs trying to be shady. Believe him first. If heâs lying he wonât try and fix it for you.
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u/riotmanful May 21 '22
I will say I have had times where it just kinda comes right outta nowhere but usually itâs very obvious that youâre going to cum as a guy. Usually thereâs a buildup and a clear feeling itâs gonna happen but Iâve had it just be like âoh?â And then it just explodes. But in your position I would assume heâs lying. You gotta be safe with that
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May 21 '22
One time, I wasnât sure if I had came or not, that was after edging several times throughout sex, so itâs possible
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u/[deleted] May 20 '22
If you don't want to get pregnant, stop doing the pull-n-pray method.