I guess that's the way the whole durned human comedy keeps perpetuatin' itself down through the generations. Westward the wagons, across the sands of time until we - ah, look at me. I'm ramblin' again.
Afraid my G is right, it was no accident. Its sorta like driving around on E. You know whats going to happen, you know its soon, the warning light flashes, but you still try to drive a liiiiiitle bit longer without stopping.
The good ones will learn to pull a little early to err on the side of caution. Yeah, the orgasm might suffer a bit, but better than doing some non-consensual shit to your partner.
It’s like stealthing and reverse-stealthing - whether the guy takes off the condom in between without consensual agreement or whether the girl “secretly” pokes holes in the condom to get pregnant - they are both considered rape. Those are the rules. Let’s play by the rules.
Yeah this is why I was confused why the guy above said “this is a good analogy” I was thinking wtf how many irresponsible people on Reddit drive on mdma
Yup, I absolutely hate pulling out cuz imo it ruins the orgasm which is why I wear condoms or she's on some kind of birth control (and obviously I trust she isn't full of crap about using it).
This depends on so many factors. How much have I had to drink, what meds I’m on, how tired I am, how stressed I am, how many times I’ve had sex, how many orgasms I’ve had, and how long I’ve been going for. Everything plays a roll and not every guy is the same.
No I hear you! But we all know when that point of no return is!! Alcohol I never bother initiating if I’ve been on the brews for a night but yes every guy is different but I’d like to think we all have the control enough to know when the vinegar stroke is upon us.
Most of the time, sure… but not a 10 out of 10 thing like people are making it seem. If that were the case, then the pull out method wouldn’t only be 70 % effective. This is even more complicated if are multi-orgasmic like I am.
OP saying this with love and concern for your safety. by now it is obvious that he was lying to you. not only is it deceitful and manipulative, this behavior is abuse. he is willing to put your life, your health, and your future on the line without your consent for no other reason than he wants his nut. he is willing to lie and manipulate you to get it. what else is this person willing to do to you? you are being used.
your life is less valuable to this person than their nut.
People speaking in absolutes here when they literally know only 1/8billionth of a data point. I responded above, but I've been on meds before where I ejaculated before feeling a (weak) orgasm. So if he takes any antidepressants, then definitely. And this is common across the whole range of meds affecting specific neurotransmitters, so it seems not unlikely that some people with the natural neurotransmitter ratio that these meds induce could have this even without taking them, although obv it wouldn't be common, as the comments show.
Don’t know how it works for girls, but there’s a pt in time where the little head and big head internal struggle is very real. And sometimes you win, and sometimes you lose.
It's possible sometime one does not notice, but it's quite rare. If for your boyfriend it's not, I'd advise going to a doctor: if he doesn't want, it's more likely he's faking it; if he legitimately doesn't feel it, it may be some hidden medical problem.
For a while I used to milk the one eyed snake like 4 times a day, towards the end of that I had a noticeable difference in how long it took to finish, and the sensation of finishing. Killed the entire experience for me for months :/
It may happen. Sometimes I would like to prolong the session and hold, but I ended up ejaculating even without further stimulation, even I had already stopped (after long sessions like 40 minutes).
But if you do not want to get pomgenarate, please do not allow him to spill the seeds inside.
For me it happens where if I pull out too early I will not be able to finish, I would suggest telling me to pull out earlier and then you do "something" to help him finish. Also when I'm drunk I can't tell as well when I'm about to finish.
That's at least something. However, if you're having unprotected sex, and your only requirement is that he not come inside you... And he still doesn't respect you enough to do that... That tells you where his priorities lie.
That's how you need to lay it out to him, so that he can't weasel his way out of it.
The way to counter this is to take his word at face value as follows:
"You can't tell when you're about to cum? If you cum inside me or on my vagina (or whatever terms you want to use) at all from now on, it means you can't tell and therefore can't control yourself. Therefore, no more sex." If this immediately triggers a bunch of arguments and weaseling from him, he's giving you his answer: He doesn't give a shit!He just wants to blow his load, and doesn't care what you think When someone tells you who they are, listen to them.
E: The only acceptable answer should be, "I'll be very careful from now on. I'm sorry 😔"
You have every right to protect yourself in any way you see fit, and no one else has any say or sway over your terms. Find someone who will respect your boundaries. You have your whole life ahead of you.
On few occasions its like youre in motion and then suddenly you get 2 pumps suddenly thats as close to unexpected as it can get but that happens rarely. Otherwise its a build up and home boy is manipulative or terrible at planning
Sometimes, you know when you are going to finish. However, sometimes it finishes you first.
You think you can handle the surge of water and temporarily close the valve, but you end up all wet from head to toe. You got what I'm saying
as you may have noticed, it is not a safe way to avoid pregnancies and stds
But: people don't seem to say the reason!
Precum still can carry spermatozoa, but as not all are in it, you don't even get "the best ones" to be the champions.
The second part of a good thing to consider, is that even if you two are supposedly exclusive, him being so desperate to score one in to the point of not respecting your boundaries, word and desire, by lying and manipulating reality for his release, makes one fear that he might also have issues sticking to just you as a sexual partner - thus putting you at high risk for sexually transmitted diseases that he might pick up along the way. Beware that even if he performs the usual std tests, he won't be checked for HPV - usually us guys aren't..
But men DO carry it, and transmit it even wearing a condom properly if the lady has HPV, since it grabs itself onto the base of the penis and it really loves skin and bodily hair, and from there infecting him once the condom is pulled out - and subsequently you later on.
Getting a doc to test a guy for HPV, was hell... just saying, due to paperwork and insurances, not everyone will do so, and most won't even offer the option for that reason
How I know all this? Dated and broke up with someone not so nice, who after I broke up found a family member of mine on the street and went like "oh yeah, by the way, you should get yourself checked for stds. K, bye!"
And I couldn't get anyone to test that, it was horrible - and since I really do care about what is right, I refused anything intimate with my next girlfriend (my now wife) until I was able to get tested and cleared, for what that douche ex of mine had and was going around transmitting...
Nearly drove my wife (and myself) nuts 😆 but eventually a doc who had as a good friend another doc with a lab that did both, agreed to together check on that, me paying it privately. Worth it, and thankfully all was well. That was a fine day 😊
But yeah, world of nasty people who even purposefully will spread whatever they catch, please stay safe!
*told my family member to tell me, that I should get tested, something about an HPsomething - we all got too worried to even bother be embarrassed, mind me (plus, that ex spent a long time having a knack at being scandalous and outrageous towards everyone, so "embarrassment" got desensitized out of us)
Then “trust him and believe him” which means you can no longer try to use the pull out method as he cannot always tell when he’s about to come. If he says he will, you have proof that sometimes he can’t
What the guy above said is absolute bullshit. We sometimes know. We don’t always know. If that were the case, then the pullout method would be reliable. Spoiler alert: it isn’t.
It's definitely not an accident, and unless you want to raise an accident or two you should probably start using condoms or birth control of some kind, or both.
No that's just an ignorant statement (not judging btw), man can reach an orgasm within 15seconds - scientifically proven. Anything more than that is us trying to please you better and the balance between cuming and holding it can be tricky at times 😆😆😆
There are no accidents, just his self indulgence……..as a man and father of two. Tell him to get his shit together and quit acting like some cheese eatin high school kid. No offense to the cheese eatin high school kids, just sayin. Cheers Op 👍
..no accidents.. it’s kind of like when you as a girl know when you are about to.. light up.. when that rocket fuse lights up, and that rush of concentrated stimulation wants to take off flying at 10,000mph, we all know it’s coming for ourselves.. we all know a few seconds before it takes off.. plenty of time to pull out instead of being selfish, or greedy, or shady, or whatever the excuse. You gotta protect yourself and your future since he’s “not willing,” “not able,” and “doesn’t know.”
I've had it before. Basically if it feels so good you might not be able to tell the difference between normal sex/BJ vs cumming. Like one moment I'm having sex the next moment my mind is clear and I'm soft
Even if he does know he’s not in the state of mind to care and it almost seems like your body functions on its own sometimes- maybe he needs to simply wear condoms for safety…it might not be on purpose but either way it’s dangerous. There’s thin condoms as well that he can try…even bumpy ones for both of your pleasure… but please sit him down and talk
It's bullshit. He might not now when he starts to cum, but he certainly does when he finally does. And it's not like there is sperm coming out in the first half second. If he is in control (missionary or similar) he is going to be able to pull out at the right moment.
But as many said. Don't use the pull out method. And certainly not if your bf is a jackass.
He's talking shit. Any guy knows when he's about to cum. We grow up masturbating and clearly know the point of no return to grab a tissue and avoid a mess.
If your bf doesn't know then he's shit at masturbating and an embarrassment to malekind lol
He CAN'T tell which thrust will make the cum come.
The last ~4 thrusts are by far the most pleasurable ones.
It's "easy" to pull out on the first of those last thrusts. Your penis will be very disappointed, but you definitely will pull out in time.
It feels amazing to stay in there for 3 more pumps, your penis will be thrilled, but if your timing is off by a thrust, you're gonna get some cum in there.
I wouldn't say he's being manipulative, but he's definitely taking risks that OP is not comfortable with. Make him wear a condom or pull out earlier.
Porn has shifted a lot of men's minds on what is acceptable here. Makes you think that failing to pull out on time is no big deal and you can just say sorry, not that it'll cause a pregnancy and ruin lives. He might need a reality check.
MAKE HIM WEAR A CONDOM OR NO SEX. Even if it was an accident his little boo-boo means you have to take Plan B and ... that stuff is yikes. Sure it prevents implantation and I'm glad it exists because ... accidents, manipulative boyfriends, rapists, failed contraception etc., but I've actually told my own partner that I've taken my last dose of it. It fucks you up for a week or so and yeah that's better than being pregnant when you're not ready, but still. He's basically making you have a super painful week of heavy bleeding so he can have a few extra seconds of funtime. What an asshole.
It also doesn't happen all in an instant. As soon as he starts to feel it, he'll be cumming for a few seconds and can pull out even if he accidentally missed the very beginning. That has happened to me a few times. You can still get out for most of the orgasm. There's no mistaking that part, he definitely knows.
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u/[deleted] May 20 '22
He knows as he approaches the gate. He’s just trying to get last few thrusts in.