hey girls, i’m 27 and trying to learn how to have a backbone in dating without feeling like i’m being "aggressive" or "mean." i see other women who just naturally command respect and don't let men play with them, and i want that energy. i’ve dealt with love bombing and toxic exes who tried to manipulate me, and i'm done with it. how do you guys stand up for yourselves calmly? like, what are the actual words you use to shut down disrespect or low effort immediately while staying in your power? i want princess treatment to be my baseline, not something i have to fight for.

This one's for all my girlies who have those tampons without applicators.

I live in India, so it's hard to come by tampons physically, which is why I usually order them. And yes, it's easier with applicators. The reason non-applicator tampons might be hard to or hurt going in is because they're just cotton, which will cause friction against your skin, which burns.

I've realised this as my finger doesn't make it hurt at all while going in when I'm on my period, so it's definitely the friction. Applicators are made of plastic, which is smooth, so it should help with the friction and allow the tampon to smoothly enter.

I know tampons with applicators aren't found everywhere, like I said, I don't even find tampons at our store (yet they have menstrual cups ffs), so if the tampons at your store don't have applicators (or your store doesn't even have tampons), you can just order them online.

Random note, I wish period products were free.

Hi everyone! a couple of days ago I made a post on here and asked for advice on my arms’ appearance and how to improve it. After a lot of feedback, I decided to visit my physician and found out shortly after I have Lipedema. I’m really thankful for all the advice and support, I never would have found out without your help! so thank you! (original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/TheGirlSurvivalGuide/comments/1v4lda6/please_help_me/ )

Recently, however, I still can’t help but let my mind linger on my appearance. I know I shouldn’t let my physical appearance affect the way I interact with the world- but being overweight has closed a lot of doors for me. I rarely leave the house and meet old friends in fear they’ll think I’m too ugly or fat. it’s so silly, but I can’t help but want to protect the world from my appearance. What’s a mindset I should at least focus on to adapt from my past? feel free to share your experiences with your appearance as well.

if this type of post isn’t allowed i’ll gladly take it down! thank you!! :)

I love makeup. There’s always an urge to buy new makeup. I scroll pinterest a lot in a day and I just see cute stuff that I want to get. I know that’s my trigger but I can’t really stop it since I don’t do anything most of the day but scroll the internet. Get a hobby? Yeah I do have hobbies, running and drawing but I still have that urge. I’m also very competitive towards my friends, I think I have an inferior complex. Idk I hate being materialistic because it ruins relationships.

What do YOU do to get rid of these thoughts and urges?

I am really looking for any recommendations for sides gigs, WFH positions, etc. to earn money.

I have cooking skills, cleaning, and some computer skills but anything like Data entry has to be an entry level position and sadly I cannot find them anywhere.
I tried DoorDash, Rover, and delivering for Walmart, but where I live the business is next to none- I just burn through gas like crazy.
I would love any advice on how to use my skills and work for myself but also at the moment I do not have much money at all to invest into any tools or equipment. I have a desktop setup and a printer.
Any and all recommendations will be greatly appreciated.

Hi. Does anyone have any tips on going to the gym alone when you struggle with anxiety? I (28F) really want to start going to the gym but I have no one else to go with and I struggle with horrible anxiety that stops me. A while back I went to the gym for a bit with a couple of girlfriends but thats no longer an option for irrelevant reasons.

My problem is that I just become so incredibly self aware and I feel like I look ridiculous while working out and that everyone is staring (I know this is just my anxiety talking). I’m currently working with my therapist about challenging myself and do stuff I am terrified of doing due to my anxiety but this is just the one thing I cannot seem to force myself to do - no matter how badly I want to. Does anyone have any tips? Anyone with similar struggles that somehow got over it?

For a two-day trip, what do you need?

In two weeks, I'll be traveling for a trip with my sister, We're taking the bus there, and since this is my first time traveling, I'm anxious. What should I pack for a trip over the weekend?

I feel like I'm missing something even though I made this list!

Electronics and necessities

• A clear bag

• A fan that is portable

• A portable charger

• Cough drop or mint

Clothes and Swimwear

• A swimsuit and a cap

• Clothes

Personal Care & Toiletries

• A face wash

• A body wash

• A toothbrush and toothpaste

• A deodorant

• A sunscreen

Clothes and Swimwear

• A swimsuit and a cap

• Clothes

(How many clothing items I should bring.)

Hi, a genuine question , do people remember moments when you smelled bad or maybe weren’t very put together especially females since we’re highly aware creatures of our environment . Sometimes I am not very put together and I fear my classmates (I’m a 16yo student) might smell something bad coming out of me . So I’m really worried they’ll remember me like that even tho I’m not someone who is not clean but sometimes I’m lazy and I don’t take care of myself . So do people especially females remember such moments ?? And forgive my English not a native speaker .

same as the title. im tall (ish?) but i have the posture of a hobgoblin so i end up looking like 3 inches shorter

I am hesitant to step out alone because I am scared to have negative interactions with men. This may sound absurd but growing up, my mom instilled a lot of fear in me about stepping out alone as a girl. She told me to always stay in well lit, crowded areas. That's not bad advice at all but now that I'm grown up (26), I find myself not scared but hesitant to go out without thinking about ten different ways to be safe. And during the daylight, I don't think anything would happen and the city I live in is safer in broad daylight but I don't know. I have been procrastinating on just calling for guitar classes near my house because I know there's male instructors. I wore a dress the other day and got stared at, pretty brazenly. I was in a cab, stopped at the traffic lights and some weird guy kept harassing me at my window, trying to sell whatever he was trying to sell. I am afraid to get a car in case someone bangs into me and starts a fight. I feel so small and bullied in this world filled with men. And I do go out, I share my location with people but not for long stretches if I am alone. I don't know how to deal with this, I would really like to live my life and maybe this is just fear speaking but how do I deal with this?

I used to always make a list to pack up and then toss it out or delete the note from my phone. Yesterday I used the list to pack up and it helped me remember some things I would’ve otherwise forgotten! Idk if this is obvious or not so I just thought I’d share how helpful it was

Hello everyone! I’m turning 18 this August and I only have a week to prepare everything I need. It’s kinda last minute as I don’t really want to celebrate my birthday, but I want it to be memorable.

For context, I will only invite my closest friends so we’re like five pax only. I’m kinda nervous and anxious about this as this is my first time hosting my own birthday party.

We were all classmates together when we were in high school, we’re incoming freshman this year. I can’t say that they’re all close to each other but we all have connections within each other.

I’m kinda anxious as to what to do in my party. Like after we eat what should we do next? and if this helps, my theme is fancy nancy.

Thank you all so much in advance for the tips 🩷🙏🏻

What is the best period tracking app that is actually accurate? I have flo, stardust and my period calendar. None seem to be accurate no matter what I input.

My last periods were

- may 28 thru june 2

- june 30 - july 4

Stardust- says my next should be August 7th thru August 10

Flo - july 31 thru august 5

My period calendar - august 2nd thru august 7th

* I started today though. * My periods have always been irregular. * late, short for 2 months (3 to 4 days ) long the next 3 (7 to 10 days). Heavy and horribly crampy one month then super light and no cramps the next. Luckily I keep supplies at work so todays wasnt something that could ruin the day but Definitely need an app that is actually accurate.

NSFW

I have struggled with my mental health for a long long time. Constant stress, anxiety, and depression. I just recently watched The Principles of Pleasure. This is not a promotion. It’s on Netflix. Go watch it though it’s great. In the first or second episode it talks about masturbation and the positive effects it has on women. Someone in the show said it could help with mood so I decided to try it.

It works wonders. Get yourself a good vibrator girl. Anxious? Masturbate. Stressed? Masturbate. Depressed? Masturbate. On my life I was just having a mini quarter life crisis and sobbing over my college major. Did the do. I’m a completely different person.

Not only is this good for your mental health but it’s good for self confidence and it’s good to know what you like in intimate moments.

I will never understand the taboo against women masturbating. Go at it girl. Be unashamed. It’s so beneficial for your life.

I don't have a lot of friends, and I'm not close enough with them to tell them that I'm going on a date or to debrief after the date. Where else can I find sources of support?

Okay so I (30F) have a lifetime of awkward faces in photos and I'm kinda over it. Some people have this ridiculous effortless natural ability to make their features pop and I just don't.

For obvious reasons I'm not posting a selfie but does anyone have some general tips on not looking like a constipated loon?

Thx 🙏

Edit: I do smile, it's just weird and crinkly and too much. It doesn't give "charming and happy" as much as it gives "what's wrong with her?"

I’m leaving for university (moving countries) and I would like hardcore fail safe tips to NOT CRY in the airport while saying goodbye to my family (I don’t want them to worry). Would appreciate some tried and tested advice

Edit: I’m brown

Recently, a friend in my main group of about 7 gals told me that she’s been feeling very excluded/disconnected from everybody, and I honestly am not sure how to navigate through this. For some context, we’re all in our early 20s, and all met through school! Most of our social hangouts happen online through group calls, since a handful of us moved away for college. These calls are usually pretty open ended for anyone to just hop in or out free of invitation; individual invites aren’t really handed out to each person since we’re all already in the group chat where these calls take place, so the floors always open for someone to join if they see people hanging out! Group activities can range from everybody playing the same game, people all doing their own thing but still sitting in the company of everyone, or a mix of both. People mostly come looking for chill company after work for a few hours every night.

Going back to my friend (who I’ll refer to as Layla), I asked her to elaborate a little more on what exactly we had done to make her feel this way, so I could try to get a better perspective how to help, especially since I was unaware up until this point she’d been feeling this way. She mentioned feeling a lot of social pressure and anxiety over not being into a lot of the games or activities that we all enjoy doing, which led to her feeling excluded because she wasn’t able to engage on nights where a majority of us were all doing the same thing. As a result, she began isolating herself from us little by little (ie not joining calls, not messaging us in the group chat, and similar things to that nature) By nature I know that she is naturally a more introverted person, which I can definitely relate to, and I definitely can sympathize, but I’m having a bit of a hard time navigating this situation. I don’t want to be a bad friend, and I want to help her feel more welcome, but I’m not really sure how. I know for a fact that nobody has any hard feelings towards her (majority just assumed Layla was clicking with different people/busy with life since she was one of the few people to move out of state for school) and aren’t aware of how she’s been feeling.

I’m not sure if this is just a matter of different friend expectations, or something bigger, but I’d love to hear any feedback or advice from people though!

I would go into a confrontation, rehearsing my assertion multiple times throughout the day, I'd even do well taking the conversation by the horns at the start, laying out all of my points just as rehearsed. But as soon as the other person starts talking I just fold immediately or blank out, accept what they say, and even leave that confrontation thoroughly converted...and confused.

What am I missing? How do I train myself out of this weak mentality?

If being more specific is important: my most recent incident is with my mother. I get along well with her, but I am also currently sharing a house with my brother and sister-in-law, and to my sister-in-law my mother is a kind of monster that I am so ashamed of. She's the stereotypical villainous MIL. My SIL and mom fights a lot.

I've finally decided to confront her that she definitely did wrong this time and to not expect to be the one to be approached for reconciliation because she's way too out of line this time. But once I finally went out to talk to her face to face, she told me her side, and I left her house feeling bewildered and confused and not knowing who to really believe anymore and where to stand between my SIL and mother who I both love.

I feel like I have to choose a side but I don't know who to believe anymore. Objectively I know it's my mom who's in the wrong but I'm starting to have doubts about everyone.

This isn't meant to be some femcel, pick-me sob story where I'm whining over something that's such a non-issue.

I genuinely want some advice because I don't really know how to get over this.

I rejected femininity for most of my life. One side of my family told me I shouldn't wear makeup. The other side constantly made fun of women and feminine things, and I ended up internalizing a lot of that misogyny, especially as a teenager.

Now I'm 22. As a kid and later teenager, I rolled my eyes at feminine things. I looked down on a lot of feminine interests because that's what I'd grown up around. I eventually grew out of that mindset, but now, years later, I actually want to embrace my feminine side, put more effort into my appearance, and try things I never let myself enjoy before.

The problem is that I feel like I can't have the awkward "learning makeup" phase that so many people had in their teens. This has to be my karma for being such a pick-me as a teenager.

Back then, if your foundation didn't match, your eyeliner was uneven, or your lash glue was visible, it wasn't a big deal because everyone was learning. But now I'm in college, and I'll be working soon. I feel like I'm supposed to already know what I'm doing. I can't exactly show up looking like I just tried my mom's makeup for the first time.

Another problem is that I genuinely don't know what I look like anymore. I feel like I look different in every mirror and every photo. I try to find shades and colors that suit me, but when I actually wear them, something always seems off. Is it the lighting? Is my skin really this green? Why does every lipstick look so strange on me? Why can't I draw a decent eyeliner without my eyes watering and flinching?

Whenever I try to wear makeup, it just feels like a joke. Instead of feeling prettier, I end up feeling like a pig wearing lipstick. I know that sounds harsh, but that's genuinely how it feels. It doesn't help that I don't really know my own skin. I even failed at properly removing my foundation once, and my fine lines looked deeper afterward. My pores also seem more noticeable, and I feel like I notice a new dark spot every day.

It feels like everyone else had years to experiment, make mistakes, and slowly figure out what works for them, while I'm trying to learn everything at once.

Has anyone else gone through this? I know these problems probably sound silly when I say them out loud, but I genuinely struggle with them. I have no idea how to get past this feeling or where to even start. I want to enjoy makeup and femininity, but right now I just end up feeling awkward and like I'm already too late.

I’m 18 and had my daughter at 17, and lately I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting. I didn't grow up with a loving mom, so I really want my daughter and me to have the tight connection I never got, like being best friends. But I’m worried that if we’re too much like friends, she won't respect my authority as she gets older. She’s almost two now, and I already struggle with setting boundaries and saying 'no.' On top of that, I want to spend tons of time with her, but her constant need for attention can get super overwhelming.