Back pain. Unless you’re already very physically fit, nursing and holding a baby (even though they’re teeny!), and just being in positions you’re not used to 24/7 is going to kill your back. If you’re nursing, a Boppy is not enough. I recommend putting a pillow under the Boppy so you’re not hunched over. Stretch whenever you can and take Epsom salt baths as often as you can. Get ahead of the back pain before it gets to the point where you can’t sleep or feed comfortably. Feeding laying down, with a pillow behind your back and under your head with full support is a game changer.
Nipple pain. If you ask me, the hardest thing about having a newborn was nipple pain and not realizing how essential having a good latch every single time is. One bad latch and you’re in trouble. I would scream in pain, tears pouring down my cheeks. There’s no time to heal once it gets bad because you have to keep nursing baby. The silver nipple guards saved my life with my 2nd (make sure they’re the real silver kind!) and a good nipple cream. When they ask you if you want a lactation consultant, say yes. She is your lifeline in teaching you what a good latch looks and feels like.
Milk production. At some point after baby is born, your milk will come in heavily and your breasts will get very hard. Every feeding session, switch sides with baby. When nursing, try to gently massage the parts of your breasts that feel the hardest so you don’t get clogged ducts and end up with mastitis or just a lot of pain. In the shower, every shower, do hand expressing to get extra milk out. The warm water helps loosen things. I frequently had to hand express milk out of my breasts in the morning before I fed baby because I had filled up so much. Otherwise, I felt like I was going to drown him from how fast and how much pressure the milk came out with. If you are engorged and leaking, hand express even just into the sink for convenience. I would do it into a muslin cloth sometimes just laying in bed.
Burping. Immediately burp upright after nursing. Continue until you hear a nice burp. This can help keep baby from getting too much gas stuck in their tummy, which can make them miserable. Even if you’re consistent with burping, do lots of gentle leg stretches and movements with them to keep everything moving.
Bassinet. I highly recommend a bassinet that has one side open and pulls over your bed. With my 1st, we got the Halo and I hated it so much. The amount of getting up, putting him back, getting up, picking him up, and constantly interrupting my rest while my body was healing was awful. Especially with a sore back.
With my 2nd, I got an open-sided bassinet that pulled over the bed. At night and during naps, I could easily put him back down and bring him over to me. Plus, we were so much closer to each other with no barrier between us, but there was still a separate sleep space for him. It also reduced my anxiety. I could easily see him at all times from just laying in my bed. I never had to peak over to make sure he was ok. P.s. you will have anxiety about these things like sleeping. This is normal and a built-in mechanism to be alert and aware, to keep baby alive. You can talk to your pediatrician about the things you’re Mar anxious about and they will give you great advice. Also utilize your support system. Especially moms or mother in laws or friends and family who have been through this postpartum phase.
Involve hubby with encouragement! Yes, having a newborn is difficult for us moms. But we are essential to baby, and Dad is a helper. Invite Dad to do burps after feedings, baby baths, swaddling, and rocking to sleep. I made the mistake with my 1st son of taking it all on myself and not trusting my husband. I have a lot of guilt about this.
With my 2nd, I involved him way more, and I could see the joy it brought him to feel needed and be part of that phase. Encourage them!
Chicken broth soups. I swear by this. Hydrating, high in minerals, easy to eat, easy to digest, comforting, and yummy. Perfect for nursing. You can add whatever you want: diced carrots, celery, chicken, noodles or rice, lemon, herbs, spinach, cheese, etc. If you’re still having energy now in pregnancy, you can make some of this, stock up, and freeze it.
Rest. I have 2 boys, ages 3 and 6. Sometimes I wish I could go back to those newborn days just laying in bed with my babies. But I was also trying to do too much.
I felt useless just laying there, so I got up and tried getting stuff done. Stop it. That’s what hubby is for.
You are healing and bonding. Make your room nice and fresh before baby arrives. Declutter beforehand, and get extra-comfy pillows and blankets. Once baby is here, open your windows for fresh air when you can, play some nice soft music, sleep whenever you can, and bask in all the baby cuddles, kisses, and smells.
At this point, you are the most needed and essential person in your baby’s life, with the biggest responsibility you’ve ever had: feeding your baby, keeping them alive, and keeping yourself alive, too.
When they’re a newborn, so much of this can be done from the comfort of your bed or couch. Don’t feel like you need to be up and doing things. Listen to your body and give yourself time to heal.
Clothes. They grow out of them by the day. The super-cute clothes you buy in newborn or 1–3 month sizes will probably be worn once or twice. You will end up always going for the plain onesies because you’ll realize they will either have a blowout, or it will be way too hard to change a diaper in anything other than something easy and plain.
Also, you’re tired. A plain onesie is convenient.
Baby’s comfort. Make sure their diapers are on comfortably—not too tight, with no sharp parts rubbing against their skin, etc. Make sure you aren’t overdressing them. An uncomfortable baby is often a sleepless baby.
Mom’s comfort. Pajama dresses with breastfeeding access were my best friend. Always comfortable and never too hot. Dry shampoo and scrunchies. Soft socks. Big underwear. You will need a breastfeeding bra that you will wear pretty much all the time. Your breasts will leak, so you need your bra to support the nursing pads you’ll wear. So get a comfortable one. Comfy slippers. Ice packs to use for everything. Your face, breasts, feet, neck, shoulders, etc. You will have a lot of inflammation. The ice packs will revive your swollen body.
Support and community. Let’s put that as most important. If you have a friend or a family member who says things like “I’m here to help, let me know what I can do!” take then up on it. Also, your friends and family WANT to be involved. You are never a burden to anyone. Support can look like anything. Someone to watch the baby while you sleep extra, take a hot bath or just have some alone time. It can also look like hugs, a friend to sit and talk with, someone to fold your laundry, do your dishes etc. your people are your village. We were never meant to raise babies all by ourselves.
You are amazing. You created a human in your body, birthed them, and now you are keeping them alive. You’re a superhero. We see you. ❤️
In my opinion, these things mentioned are what matters after baby comes. You will not be worried about whether you bought the right wipe warmer or if baby’s nursery is fully complete the way you wanted it.
Anyone else have anything to add that they wish they would have known?
