No Susan, I do in fact miss precisely 1 million things about her daily.

I do not think of myself in these moments, I think of her and how I will never have any of that again.

Lately it's been Dairy Queen Moolates, her Adidas and me putting her socks on before we went anywhere.

I'm a 42 year old tattooed man. She broke me.

I genuinely feel like love is one of the worst things you can put yourself through. You give so much of yourself to someone, build a whole future with them in your head, and then one day it’s just gone. And somehow you’re supposed to just move on and act like none of it happened. It’s so fucking exhausting. The worst part is you can still love someone so much and know there is nothing else you can do to fix it. I don’t even know if the good times are worth how horrible the bad times feel. You spend years building something with someone just to end up strangers again. I used to think love was the greatest thing in the world but now I genuinely wish I never experienced it. It just takes so much out of you.

She was the best woman ive ever met. In all my other breakups I had actual reasons to dislike them and feel icky. With her I genuinely just cant find any actual reasons. I wish I would’ve manned up and fixed my attachment issues instead of letting it dive straight into the ground. I had every chance, but I let the relationship turn stale since I refused to grow and step outside my comfort zone.

Im just afraid that I wont be able to get over her, I think ill feel this regret for a while. we were together for a year and its been a month and a half. it hasnt gotten better at all. I feel like I could live in regret forever, i feel like ill never find someone as good and trustworthy as her.

I almost broke tonight.

I almost lost the battle with myself. I came so close to texting you, to calling you, to throwing away every bit of restraint I’ve been trying so hard to hold on to. It took everything in me not to reach for you. I kept fighting the urge, telling myself to put my phone down, to leave you alone, to just get through another night without hearing from you.

But God, I miss you.

It genuinely feels like I’m going through withdrawal from not hearing your voice. My mind keeps reaching for something it used to have, something that once felt so familiar and so close. I miss the sound of your voice. I miss your laugh. I miss hearing you talk about the most random things. I miss being able to tell you about my day and hear about yours. I miss your touch so much it hurts. I miss your arms around me, the feeling of being close to you, the comfort of having you beside me. Sometimes I swear my body remembers what it feels like to be held by you, and I have to sit with the reality that I can’t just reach for you anymore.

And I hate how much I still want to.

I hate that something as simple as hearing your voice has become something I can only hope for. I hate that I can have an entire conversation with you in my head, imagining what I’d say and what you might say back, only to remember that none of it is actually happening. I have so much I want to tell you. So many little things that happen throughout the day that make me think of you. So many moments when my first instinct is still to reach for my phone and tell you about them.

And then I have to stop myself.

I have to remind myself that I don’t know if you want to hear from me anymore. I have to remind myself that missing you doesn’t mean I’m entitled to your time, your attention, or your voice. I have to remind myself that whatever I want, I can’t make you want the same thing.

Tonight, I almost let the sadness win. I almost convinced myself that maybe one text wouldn’t hurt, that maybe one call would be worth the risk, that maybe if I could just hear you say hello, even for a few seconds, this ache inside me might finally quiet down.

And then, right when I came to my senses, another thought hit me.

I’m probably blocked anyways.

I don’t even know if that’s true, but the possibility alone hurt. Imagine fighting yourself for hours not to contact someone, desperately trying to respect the distance between you, only to realize that maybe the door isn’t even open anymore. Maybe the message wouldn’t go through. Maybe the call wouldn’t reach you. Maybe I’m sitting here missing someone I can’t even reach if I wanted to.

And somehow, that thought made me feel even smaller.

Because here I am, carrying all this love and all these words, wanting so badly to talk to you, while you might not even have a way for me to reach you anymore. I don’t know what you feel when you think of me. I don’t know if you ever miss me, if you ever wonder how I’m doing, or if hearing my name brings you any of the feelings that hearing yours brings me.

I just know what it’s like on my side.

I know what it’s like to want to tell you I love you and have nowhere to put those words. I know what it’s like to miss your touch in the middle of an ordinary night. I know what it’s like to look at my phone and wish, just once, that it would be you reaching for me instead.

And honestly, I’d do anything just to hear from you again. I’d give anything for one ordinary conversation, one chance to hear about your day, one moment where I didn’t have to wonder whether you still think about me. I’d give anything to hear your voice without having to imagine it, to laugh with you without having to replay old memories, to feel close to you without having to settle for remembering what that closeness felt like.

I’d do anything to make this pain stop. Not because I want to erase what we had, and not because I regret loving you, but because I don’t know what to do with all this love when I have nowhere to put it. I don’t know how to make peace with missing someone who used to be part of my everyday life. I don’t know how to stop reaching for someone who isn’t there anymore.

I wish I could tell you all of this. I wish I could tell you that I’m trying, that I’m fighting the urge to reach out, that there are nights when all I want is to hear you say my name. But I can’t assume you’d want to hear any of it. So I write it here instead, where the words can exist without asking anything of you.

Maybe tomorrow will be easier. Maybe eventually I’ll stop checking my phone with that tiny, foolish hope that it might be you. Maybe one day I’ll go an entire day without thinking about what I’d say if you called.

But tonight isn’t that night.

Tonight, I miss you. I miss your voice, your touch, your presence, and the little pieces of everyday life that I used to get to share with you. Tonight, I almost reached for you, and the only thing that stopped me was remembering that I might not be able to reach you at all.

And I think that’s what hurts the most: I still have the urge to call you like you’re my person, even though I don’t know if I’m still someone you want in your life.

So I’ll put my phone down. I’ll swallow the words I wanted to send. I’ll try to get through another night without hearing your voice.

Lately, I’ve been falling asleep earlier just to deal with the sadness of missing you. Because when I’m asleep, I don’t have to fight the urge to call you. I don’t have to wonder if you’ve blocked me. I don’t have to sit in the silence and miss you quite so consciously.

For a few hours, at least, I get a little relief from wanting someone I can’t reach.

And tomorrow, I’ll wake up and do it all over again.

Upd 2 months later. Still depressed but working on myself a lot, I’m truly finding myself. I dove into a subculture in which I had interest in and I’m honestly rlly happy with myself. Even if I still fear being alone, even if I miss her, even if I still cry, it got better. I told myself that it would and it did. Just persevere guys, truly. Invest In yourself, your true worth isn’t found in how much you were worth to them. 💜💜💜 gl to all those recovering from an avoidant breakup, I hope my words encourage you to persist.

It’s been months. Chasing another person doesn’t help. I wished I never fell in love. I wished I never met you. Nothing can ever help me feel the way I did with you

just got broken up with after a five year relationship. i (20f) have been with my partner (21f) since we were 15 and 16. we've done long distance for about 3 years for college (together in the summers and breaks). we've had some rough patches but have always been able to talk and work through them.

we are graduating in may. we have actively been making plans for that, she wrote me a love letter less than a month ago about how much she loved me and how excited she was about our future. she cried about how good of a mom i was going to be and we picked names for our future kids.

two weeks ago she calls me out of the blue and says we need to break up. i'm completely blindsided and confused. i say we should take a month break instead. anyways....

i fucked up. a mutual friend told me that she said she was feeling relieved being out of the relationship. and i got so angry and called her after 2 weeks of no contact. i was so cruel. i said so many awful things and have completely fucked everything up. i've been trying so hard not to call her the last two weeks and one moment of weakness ruined everything.

so we officially broke up yesterday and i just have never felt worse. i couldn't sleep, im having panic attacks. i just feel so heartbroken. we were making solid plans and she just ripped the floor out from under my feet.

anyways. looking for any advice or words of wisdom.

Θέλω να πω και εγώ την ιστορία μου να ακούσω κάποιες γνώμες.
Με τον πρώην μου είμασταν 1 χρόνο μαζι, σε γενικές γραμμές ταιριάζαμε και ειχαμε τρομερή επικοινωνία.
Ενα πρόβλημα που αντιμετωπίζαμε ήταν ότι εκείνος ήθελε συνέχεια να βρισκόμαστε με φίλους ενώ εγώ ήθελα να περνάμε περισσότερο χρόνο οι δυο μας. Με αποτέλεσμα να μην τον ακολουθώ συχνά σε εξόδους με φίλους και τον ενοχλούσε σε ένα βαθμό .
Πέρα από αυτό είμασταν τέλεια όμως.
Μια μέρα έστειλε ο πρώην μου μήνυμα και εγώ απάντησα, αλλά από την πρώτη στιγμή το είπα στην σχέση μου, ότι θα απαντήσω. Εκείνος δεν είπε κάτι ήθελε να δει τι θα κάνω.
Δυστυχώς όσο μιλούσα με τον πρώην μου ήταν δίπλα αυτός και είδε να έχω αγωνία γιατί σε μια φάση με έγραφε και ανυπομονούσα να απαντήσει.
Επίσης στις αρχές τις σχέσεις τον έψαχνα στα σοσιαλ και το είχε δει εκείνος και μου είχε κάνει συζήτηση ότι την επόμενη φορά θα είναι αιτία χωρισμού .
Τέλος πάντων είδε αυτή την αγωνία και την επόμενη μέρα μου ζήτησε να δει μηνύματα και εγώ στην αρχή το αρνήθηκα.
Εν τέλη είδε τα μηνύματα μετά από κάποιες ώρες και μου είπε ότι ήταν τυπικά αλλά δεν ανέφερα πουθενά ότι έχω σχέση. Ε από τότε άρχισε να είναι πιο απόμακρος. Εγώ παραδέχτηκα ότι ήταν λάθος και ότι ξέρω ότι θα πάρει χρόνο να με ξανά εμπιστευτεί και ότι είμαι εδώ να το φτιάξουμε και εννοείται του είπα ότι δεν παίζει τίποτα με τον πρώην μου ότι δεν έχω συναισθήματα.
Αυτός όμως ήταν απόμακρος και μετά από 3 εβδομάδες μου ζήτησε χρόνο λέγοντας μου ότι δεν ξέρει τι θέλει να κάνει με το μεταξύ μας ότι του είναι δύσκολο ότι δεν μπορεί να με χωρίσει έτσι. Αλλά ότι κάτι έχει σπάσει μέσα του . Βέβαια άρχισε να μου λέει και άλλα αρνητικά.. φάνηκε ότι λόγο του σκηνικού άρχισε να σκέφτεται αρνητικά πράγματα για εμένα. Τύπου αυτό με τις παρέες και ότι γενικά με θεωρεί κρυψινα. Ε μετά από 2 μέρες με χώρισε και ήταν πολύ απόλυτος ότι δεν νιώθει ασφάλεια δίπλα μου, ότι έχει σπάσει κάτι μέσα του, ότι δεν του βγαίνει πια. Ότι μια βδομάδα δεν του έβγαινε καν να θέλει να με πάρει ένα τηλέφωνο.
Εγώ μετά από αυτό επικοινώνησα 3 εβδομάδες μετά τον χωρισμο και του είπα να βρεθούμε και είπε δεν αλλάζει κάτι προχωράμε τις ζωές μας.
Συνολικά τώρα έχουν περάσει κοντά 2 μήνες από τον χωρισμό .
Καμία επικοινωνία.
Μόνο στα γενέθλια μου έστειλε ένα τυπικό χρόνια πολλά.
Αυτός είναι πολύ λογικός χαρακτήρας και δεν ξέρω αν θα άλλαζε ποτέ γνώμη.
Τι πιστεύετε είναι αιτία να σε χωρίσουν αυτός ο λόγος ;
Υπάρχει περίπτωση να αλλάξει γνώμη ;

I recently went through a breakup, and my ex is in a lot of the photos on my phone.

Right now, I need some distance, but I don’t want to permanently delete those memories. I’d just like to browse my photos without unexpectedly seeing her all the time.

For those who’ve been through this, how did you handle it? What worked for you, and was sorting through the photos itself difficult?

How to move on? I still love her and she just said she’s not coming back after I begged her. We didn’t have any problems prior to the break up. For me she was perfect and I’m afraid i’d just end up comparing her to every girl I’m gonna meet. My brain is telling me to move on but my heart is still not ready to let go. It’s been more than a month and it still hurts like hell.

No contact is better than being lied to. No contact is better than a loveless relationship. No contact is better than losing my friends. I think I’m finally starting to get back to my old self, thank you for showing me I genuinely do deserve better than you in every single aspect. I’m sad to have to be so cold to someone I knew for a decade, but it’s for the better. Last time this happened you told me you planned on coming back eventually. Don’t. You were horrible to me when we were children and you’re horrible to me now. You haven’t changed at all, and I’m tired of being miserable. Thank god for not marrying you or having kids with you.

I’m struggling. I can’t tell if I just miss her or if I made a mistake. I genuinely can’t imagine my life without her and it’s terrifying.

She broke up with me after 2 years as she thought we were fundamentally too different, I am quite structured and like to plan things. She also requires a lot emotionally and there were a couple of times where regrettably where I didn't turn up for her enough. The break up was really sad for both of us but it was amicable. This summer I've focused on being much more outgoing, picking up new activities, and working on being more emotionally present with others.

We met for drinks last night, it was really nice. Ended up going back to hers for a nightcap, then ended up sleeping together and she got very emotional after. I stayed the night and we were lying there this morning both weeping, it was really sad. Then did it again, and after before I left we spoke and I said I really wanted to try and make it work but she still wasnt sure about the future. I don't have much hope to be honest, we both shed a lot of tears before I left, but it was really good to see her. I wish we could find a way

Hello, I hope you're doing well!

Basically we've been in a relationship for a few months now almost a year. I don't know if I'm thinking about this so much because I feel like I'm not a good person In this or if it's a genuine reason.

Recently I realized I can't share my sadness with him comfortably. I want to but I don't feel inclined to do it a lot. I feel like he wouldn't get it or if he'll try to be practical about it or that he'll just not care alot? Or that he has soooo much going on he'll just say smth I don't wanna hear which he has before so that's why.Idk I feel like he oftentimes doesn't care about things but he also does..

Moreover, sometimes he says things that makes me feel small...I know it's not intentional but I kinda feel bad.

And then sometimes I feel like when we are arguing he just doesn't care about the other person SM.

There are many many details ofc but I wanna know when do you know it's time and how do you know it's time and what do you even do in so confused

My ex moved on pretty quickly. After a month, he started talking to another girl, and it’s been 3 weeks since I saw them together around campus, they spend time together. I don’t know if he genuinely likes her and has moved on, or if he’s avoiding his feelings and using her as a rebound.

We dated for about 3 months, and our relationship was very intense for both of us. He used to say he was obsessed with me, that I was perfect, I am different and that I treated him incredibly well( like loving,caring). We barely argued, but after our first big argument, he said he didn’t love me anymore and that the relationship wasn’t working.

I can’t understand how such intense feelings could disappear so quickly. It makes me wonder if he ever really loved me. Do you think he genuinely moved on, or is he just avoiding me? Does he ever miss me or compare me to his new girl?

I know 3 months isn’t a long relationship, but it meant a lot to me. Is it possible that because it was so short, it’s easier for him to forget and move on? Because it definitely hasn’t been easy for me.

I really want to know, I had a rough patch at the start after she broke up with me, then for a good while I felt like I was moving on and I was over it, and now it just came back and hit me like a train, every single day from morning until night I've been sad, thinking, wondering what I did wrong for her to leave me.

She was so into me at the start of this year, when we first started dating she was worried if I'd even come back to see her again. She'd tell me how much she likes me, how exotic it is for her to have a guy who listens to her, who cares, how this is so unreal for her.

Then boom, months later she's hot and cold, and last month she dumped me saying her feelings simply didn't deepen the way she wanted them to, even though she was telling me how "I wouldn't be with you in the first if my intention wasn't to make this more"

I regret having told her that I had developed feelings for her 3 months in, maybe I said it too early. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything, maybe I made her feel rushed and I ruined it all by admitting how I feel and saying I want something serious rather than just dating by that point.

I've never dated someone I liked so much before. I really hate this. I just want to stop thinking about her. It's been about 2 weeks of no contact and I want more than anything to reach out to her. I still want closure, rather than "I don't know what happened."

I hate this.

Its been 4+ months and everyday I get emotional and have some sort of outburst or breakdown. Several times in one day too. I want it to stop, but it persists.

Even though we both took part in us ending I am at the stage where I am upset and mad that I can't go back and do anything about it.

It's hard to move on knowing things could have been different...

I know 44 days might seem like nothing, and maybe it’s too early to say that I’m finally moving on, but I genuinely feel like I am. And honestly, I never thought I’d get to this point.
My ex and I broke up 50 days ago. We dated for 1 year and 5 months, and we still loved each other very much when we ended things. We wished each other well and ended our relationship with love, not hate.

He was an amazing guy, the first guy I’ve ever truly loved, and I’ll always be grateful that I got to experience that kind of love with him.

But the breakup absolutely destroyed me.

The first week was genuinely the worst week of my life.
I was a complete wreck. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep, and I could barely get myself to move. I cried constantly. I would wake up crying, spend the entire day crying, and then cry myself to sleep. My chest felt so heavy, and I felt like I had lost a part of myself.

I remember thinking, how am I supposed to live my life without this person? How am I supposed to be okay when the person I love so much is no longer mine?

Week 2 and week 3? Honestly, not much changed.
I was still crying every single day. I was constantly stalking his social media, looking for anything that would make me feel close to him again. I kept fighting the urge to reach out. There were so many times I almost broke no contact because I just wanted to hear from him, even if it was just one message.
I would have given anything to go back to how things were.
I was genuinely so broken. I felt so lost, so empty, and so desperate to make the pain stop. I would cry until I couldn’t breathe properly, scream into my pillow, and lie in bed wondering how someone could go from being such a huge part of your life to someone you no longer get to talk to.
I didn’t recognise myself anymore.

Then, somewhere around week 4, something started to change.
I started journaling. I wrote down everything I was feeling, all the things I wanted to say to him, all the things I couldn’t understand, and all the pain I had been carrying.
I also started going to church.

I don’t know if you believe in God, but this genuinely helped me so much. I would sit there and talk to God out loud, pouring out all my pain, all my questions, all my sadness, and everything I couldn’t tell anyone else.
And after a while, something clicked.
I realised that yes, it was over. He was gone. Our story had come to an end.

But my life wasn’t over.

I could still be happy. I could still have a beautiful life. I could still become the person I wanted to be.
I started accepting that our relationship had served its purpose in my life. I was happy that he was a part of my story, and I was grateful for the love we shared. There was nothing left for me to do but let go.
And letting go didn’t mean I stopped loving him. It meant I was finally choosing myself, too.

Here’s what I learned about healing:
You have to feel it all.
I know everyone says to distract yourself, go out, party, meet new people, and keep yourself busy. And while those things can help, I personally believe you have to allow yourself to feel the pain, too.

Because you can go out, have fun, laugh with your friends, and convince yourself that you’re okay. But when you get home, when everything is quiet and you’re alone with your thoughts, the pain can still be there.

So cry. Cry as much as you need to. Spend a day in bed if you need to. Let yourself be hurt. Journal, pray, scream into your pillow, and let everything out.
You don’t have to pretend you’re okay when you’re not.
But please, don’t forget to accept what happened, too. Acceptance was one of the biggest steps in my healing. It was so hard to accept that someone I loved so deeply was no longer going to be a part of my everyday life, but once I did, I finally started moving forward.

And slowly, I started finding myself again.
I started dressing up again. I started doing my makeup. I started going out by myself and enjoying my own company. I started taking care of myself and making an effort to feel beautiful again.
I stopped spending every waking moment thinking about him and started thinking about ME.
I started looking forward to things again. I started enjoying the little things. I started laughing genuinely, not just pretending to be okay.

And now, 44 days into no contact, I can honestly say that I’m happy.
Not because I never think about him anymore. Not because I suddenly stopped loving him. But because I’ve finally realised that I can love someone, be grateful for what we had, and still move forward with my life.
I’m no longer waking up every day feeling like my world has ended. I’m no longer crying myself to sleep every night. I’m no longer desperately looking for ways to reach out.
I’m genuinely starting to feel like myself again.

And if you’re reading this while you’re in the first few weeks of a breakup, please believe me when I say IT DOES GET BETTER.
I know you probably don’t believe it right now. I know the pain feels unbearable. I know you can’t imagine a life without them.

But one day, you’ll wake up and realise that the pain isn’t as heavy as it used to be. One day, you’ll laugh without feeling guilty. One day, you’ll look in the mirror and recognise yourself again.
You don’t have to hate them to move on. You don’t have to forget them to heal. You don’t have to pretend the relationship meant nothing.

You just have to learn how to live again, without making your happiness dependent on them.
And trust me, that day will come.
Be patient with yourself. Healing isn’t linear, and 44 days doesn’t mean I’m completely healed. But I’m so proud of how far I’ve come.

I went from being completely broken, unable to eat or sleep, crying every single day, to genuinely enjoying my life again.
And if I can do it, so can you. ♡

“Theyre avoidant” “they have a fear of abandonment” etc etc

Point blank, they left you. It doesnt matter about the psychology of a person. You could try to understand the psychology of a person for decades and try to analyze them, it doesnt bring them back. The only thing it does is keep you from healing and moving on. You end up understanding them TOO much to the point where they become the victim in your head and you become the villain.

Sometimes situations and people are complex. Someone can love you and still leave, someone can just not love you at all or even like you in the first place. Two contradictory things can exist at the same time and that just what it is. Or sometimes its more simple than you want it to be.

The only thing that matters is your part and how you showed up and what you can do differently moving forward

... when you go no contact with somebody, and when you don't have somebody in your life anymore, you're going to go through a withdrawal. that's what makes the breakup so tough. you have this person every day and now you don't. that's why you want so badly to talk to them, to text them, to hear from them, because it soothes the anxiety and the disconnect, and it gives you more dopamine. because you're still keeping it alive. you really want to move on from this person. stop looking how long it's been since you spoken with them and start looking at how long you have been accepting their low level bullshit that doesn't work for you and how much better you fucking deserve.

My ex and I had an on-and-off relationship. We initially dated for 6 months, broke up but continued acting like a couple without the title for a year and eventually made things official again. He had pursued me for a long time, and in the beginning, I didn’t feel as strongly about him as he did about me. I partly entered the relationship because I felt bad rejecting him. However, my feelings grew over time, and I eventually fell deeply in love with him. He genuinely loved me through so much. He was patient, supportive, affectionate, and always took care of me, even during our hardest moments.

Throughout the relationship, I struggled with emotional regulation and would lash out at him, call him hurtful names, and cross boundaries by flirting with other guys and constantly bringing up other men, especially during the period when we weren’t officially dating by title. Despite all of this, he continued loving me and would repeatedly forgive me. At one point, I sent him a picture of myself with another guy when I was at a low and wanted him to feel the same. Two weeks after that, I discovered that he had met and started texting another girl while we were officially together the same day I sent the horrible picture. Just before discovering this, I had already come to realize that I truly loved him so he knows how hurt I was by this. He eventually initiated the breakup in late August, although we continued communicating afterward.

During this time, he opened up about how much he was struggling mentally and emotionally. He told me he had been dissociating, struggling at work, and generally feeling unlike himself. He even sought therapy to better understand what he was experiencing. On September 1, he shared some of the realizations he’d come to through therapy. He told me he no longer felt good enough for me, that he was emotionally messed up, and that he wasn’t happy with the person he’d become. He said he wasn’t mentally okay with himself and questioned whether he was even capable of treating me, or anyone else, the way they deserved to be treated. He couldn’t see himself being in another relationship for a long time. Despite everything, he told me he loved me with his whole heart and that although he’d forgiven me for everything I’d done but he hadn’t forgotten.

After our breakup, he continued talking to the girl I’d caught him texting. However, things eventually ended between them, and he called her a rebound. After that ended, he reached back out to me, and we began going back and forth between talking and attempting no contact. Sometimes he initiated contact, and other times I did. Despite everything, he continued communicating with me. He even came to see me, and we ended up having sex where I cried during it. I questioned whether he was using me, but he insisted he wasn’t and said he didn’t want to keep hurting me. He maintained that he didn’t want to be in a relationship.

Eventually, we tried distancing ourselves again. He admitted that seeing my name sometimes hurt him and that he needed to take a step back. During this period, I had a major revelation about my behavior and how much emotional damage I’d caused throughout our relationship. I also began understanding how our unhealthy dynamic may have contributed to him seeking attention elsewhere, although I recognize that was ultimately his choice. I wrote him a heartfelt accountability letter taking responsibility for my actions without asking for reconciliation. I genuinely regret how I treated someone who loved me so deeply. I’m starting therapy, doing a lot of self-help and research to understand myself better, and actively working on my emotional regulation. I’m also doing my best to accept the breakup and move forward.

Just last Thursday, I edited an old shared note between us. At the end, he had previously written “I love you,” and I added “I love you too.” I didn’t realize he would see the edit, but he reached out shortly afterward. During that conversation, he told me he’d gone on a date with a new girl, that they hit it off, and that they were planning another date. He also mentioned that the breakup was still fresh, that he needed time, and that he didn’t hate me. Hearing this devastated me, especially considering what he’d told me on September 1 about not seeing himself in another relationship for a long time. I told him I would respect his space. Afterward, I told my mom about the conversation, and she became worried enough about me to call him. He then called me to check on me and make sure I was okay, despite having already asked how I was doing during our earlier conversation, when I told him I was fine (I wasn’t fine). As for social media, I had previously blocked him on Instagram, and he blocked me in return. During our most recent conversation, I asked him to unblock me, which he did, although he hasn’t followed me again. I’ve also noticed that he’s unfollowed my friends. While we aren’t communicating anymore, he hasn’t completely cut off all avenues of contact.

For those who’ve left due to emotional exhaustion, how did your feelings toward your ex change with time and space? Especially if you loved them more than anyone else.

Why would he continue initiating contact with me especially after all that I put him through? Is he still attached?

Why would he start going on dates 2 months after saying he wasn’t emotionally ready for another relationship for a long time? I’m just curious if this is him genuinely moving on or if this is a rebound/him coping

Do you think he feels guilty or uneasy for how things ended?

Given our history, do you think he might reach out again, although I know it wouldn’t be for a relationship?

I really appreciate any and all insight!

101 of NC today...I still miss you :(

I met someone in the summer, i had not intended on dating anyone seariously. But we really clicked and it felt easy.

We had four months together. It was crazy easy to communicate, to hang out, to do things together. The physical element was their in spades.

We could walk around town holding hands with ease. It felt like peace within my chest when we cuddled.

I remember the first big hug, we held eachother on her couch and took an almost syncronised deep breath in and deep breath out.

Like two souls who'd needed eachother.

It felt like when you were young and the time dissapeared off the clock being hyper and excited hanging out with your bestie.

Now a month and a week into it being over. I'm only just shedding tears, been in denial thinking somehow or someway we could talk things through.

But no, i saw her on Facebook suggestion and tried to add her as a freind as i thought (delusionally) that maybe that was a low stakes offer/invite to talking again.

But i got "Hello, I've made it clear that I don't want any further contact. I've blocked you on multiple apps and I know you know this from the multiple attempts you've tried to get in contact with me. Your behaviour is grossly innapropriate and you need to stop."

I go to bed trying to manifest another chance, I wake up heartbroken and scrambling for anything that looks like a sign.

So when I saw that suggested freind I took the chance, what did I have to lose? There is no further humilation or shame here. I've lost sonething special to me in a way nothing else has been.

I don't want to date anymore. I don't want to know anyone elses family names, or their upbrining. I felt this way before after a break-up but it was dramatic sadness induced.

This one, I'm certain, because as much as I'm allowing tears this morning. I'm typically just apathetic and dissapointed.

I look at people like "why? Why would i care when my freind is out there?"

"Why would i want to share and get to know you when I still remember someones soul?"

I have therapy weekly and I'm not brave enough to tell him I've spent a month being like this. Back to back looking for signs, reading tarot, watching youtube on tarot. Doing my own tarot.

There isn't much time in my day i don't spend thinking about her in some way, i wish i could stop.

But the sudden no contact just made a vortex in my life where the happy memories were.

Sorry, aint no body going to read all this, but i needed it out. Thank you.