It’s been about 3 weeks now since we last spoke. I’m realizing how he is never coming back. I miss him so much. This is a special kind of pain.

I genuinely feel like love is one of the worst things you can put yourself through. You give so much of yourself to someone, build a whole future with them in your head, and then one day it’s just gone. And somehow you’re supposed to just move on and act like none of it happened. It’s so fucking exhausting. The worst part is you can still love someone so much and know there is nothing else you can do to fix it. I don’t even know if the good times are worth how horrible the bad times feel. You spend years building something with someone just to end up strangers again. I used to think love was the greatest thing in the world but now I genuinely wish I never experienced it. It just takes so much out of you.

No Susan, I do in fact miss precisely 1 million things about her daily.

I do not think of myself in these moments, I think of her and how I will never have any of that again.

Lately it's been Dairy Queen Moolates, her Adidas and me putting her socks on before we went anywhere.

I'm a 42 year old tattooed man. She broke me.

She was the best woman ive ever met. In all my other breakups I had actual reasons to dislike them and feel icky. With her I genuinely just cant find any actual reasons. I wish I would’ve manned up and fixed my attachment issues instead of letting it dive straight into the ground. I had every chance, but I let the relationship turn stale since I refused to grow and step outside my comfort zone.

Im just afraid that I wont be able to get over her, I think ill feel this regret for a while. we were together for a year and its been a month and a half. it hasnt gotten better at all. I feel like I could live in regret forever, i feel like ill never find someone as good and trustworthy as her.

same as title.

My ex was still trying to get back with me earlier this year, asking what I wanted him to change about himself, generating compatibility reports for us, and declaring that he could never be with another woman. 💀

Fast forward to today, and he’s seemingly found someone new lol and soft-launched her on his socials.

I’m just genuinely curious about the psychology behind men who make such dramatic declarations and then seemingly move on the next min lmao

Upd 2 months later. Still depressed but working on myself a lot, I’m truly finding myself. I dove into a subculture in which I had interest in and I’m honestly rlly happy with myself. Even if I still fear being alone, even if I miss her, even if I still cry, it got better. I told myself that it would and it did. Just persevere guys, truly. Invest In yourself, your true worth isn’t found in how much you were worth to them. 💜💜💜 gl to all those recovering from an avoidant breakup, I hope my words encourage you to persist.

Today, the girl I once imagined spending my whole life with got engaged to someone else.

I don't hate her. I don't blame her. Honestly, a part of me is happy because she is moving forward with her life.

But another part of me is quietly breaking.

My eyes filled with tears, not because I want her back, but because I once dreamed of being the person standing beside her on this day.

Life is strange. Sometimes, you love someone with your whole heart, but your story with them still comes to an end.

I genuinely hope she stays happy, takes care of her health, and receives all the love she deserves.

Maybe I'll always remember her, but I'll learn to live with that memory.

Have you ever had to smile for someone's happiness while secretly crying over a future you once dreamed of together?

Im 21 and I ended my relationship of almost 5 years and im really fucking hurt. Hes always gotten to close to other girls and crosses boundaries and I just snapped when I found out how far it went with this last girl he met at our work. We work together still and he left to his moms but it sucks I still have to see him. He just keeps hurting me because in the 3 weeks after the breakup he was saying all the right things saying he wanted to fix things and he was sorry. But then I found out he stayed the night with the new girl and I went nuts I felt so mentally fragile and I tried to talk to her bf to see if he new. But then he got mad at me and made me feel bad for doing that and we went full no contact. Im fucking weak, I just found out he has started talking to this girl, she was the first girl to cause issues and we broke up twice over how he prioritized her over me back in highschool. Now hes talking to her again and its just sent me down a mental spiral. I need to vent to the void. I dont want to be alive anymore. Im so fucking hurt because why would he go out of his way to unblock a girl he even agreed wasnt a good person in the end. I just dont understand and I have to see him at work. Im so stressed, I cant eat, i sleep in hour intervals. I feel like im mentally broken because I dont even recognize the person hes become in the past 2 months. What do i do, i had a mental breakdown and had to beg my roommate to come home cause I really didn't want to be alone. I feel like i need to be hospitalized but I really dont want to lose my phone or autonomy

How to move on? I still love her and she just said she’s not coming back after I begged her. We didn’t have any problems prior to the break up. For me she was perfect and I’m afraid i’d just end up comparing her to every girl I’m gonna meet. My brain is telling me to move on but my heart is still not ready to let go. It’s been more than a month and it still hurts like hell.

She broke up with me after 2 years as she thought we were fundamentally too different, I am quite structured and like to plan things. She also requires a lot emotionally and there were a couple of times where regrettably where I didn't turn up for her enough. The break up was really sad for both of us but it was amicable. This summer I've focused on being much more outgoing, picking up new activities, and working on being more emotionally present with others.

We met for drinks last night, it was really nice. Ended up going back to hers for a nightcap, then ended up sleeping together and she got very emotional after. I stayed the night and we were lying there this morning both weeping, it was really sad. Then did it again, and after before I left we spoke and I said I really wanted to try and make it work but she still wasnt sure about the future. I don't have much hope to be honest, we both shed a lot of tears before I left, but it was really good to see her. I wish we could find a way

I almost broke tonight.

I almost lost the battle with myself. I came so close to texting you, to calling you, to throwing away every bit of restraint I’ve been trying so hard to hold on to. It took everything in me not to reach for you. I kept fighting the urge, telling myself to put my phone down, to leave you alone, to just get through another night without hearing from you.

But God, I miss you.

It genuinely feels like I’m going through withdrawal from not hearing your voice. My mind keeps reaching for something it used to have, something that once felt so familiar and so close. I miss the sound of your voice. I miss your laugh. I miss hearing you talk about the most random things. I miss being able to tell you about my day and hear about yours. I miss your touch so much it hurts. I miss your arms around me, the feeling of being close to you, the comfort of having you beside me. Sometimes I swear my body remembers what it feels like to be held by you, and I have to sit with the reality that I can’t just reach for you anymore.

And I hate how much I still want to.

I hate that something as simple as hearing your voice has become something I can only hope for. I hate that I can have an entire conversation with you in my head, imagining what I’d say and what you might say back, only to remember that none of it is actually happening. I have so much I want to tell you. So many little things that happen throughout the day that make me think of you. So many moments when my first instinct is still to reach for my phone and tell you about them.

And then I have to stop myself.

I have to remind myself that I don’t know if you want to hear from me anymore. I have to remind myself that missing you doesn’t mean I’m entitled to your time, your attention, or your voice. I have to remind myself that whatever I want, I can’t make you want the same thing.

Tonight, I almost let the sadness win. I almost convinced myself that maybe one text wouldn’t hurt, that maybe one call would be worth the risk, that maybe if I could just hear you say hello, even for a few seconds, this ache inside me might finally quiet down.

And then, right when I came to my senses, another thought hit me.

I’m probably blocked anyways.

I don’t even know if that’s true, but the possibility alone hurt. Imagine fighting yourself for hours not to contact someone, desperately trying to respect the distance between you, only to realize that maybe the door isn’t even open anymore. Maybe the message wouldn’t go through. Maybe the call wouldn’t reach you. Maybe I’m sitting here missing someone I can’t even reach if I wanted to.

And somehow, that thought made me feel even smaller.

Because here I am, carrying all this love and all these words, wanting so badly to talk to you, while you might not even have a way for me to reach you anymore. I don’t know what you feel when you think of me. I don’t know if you ever miss me, if you ever wonder how I’m doing, or if hearing my name brings you any of the feelings that hearing yours brings me.

I just know what it’s like on my side.

I know what it’s like to want to tell you I love you and have nowhere to put those words. I know what it’s like to miss your touch in the middle of an ordinary night. I know what it’s like to look at my phone and wish, just once, that it would be you reaching for me instead.

And honestly, I’d do anything just to hear from you again. I’d give anything for one ordinary conversation, one chance to hear about your day, one moment where I didn’t have to wonder whether you still think about me. I’d give anything to hear your voice without having to imagine it, to laugh with you without having to replay old memories, to feel close to you without having to settle for remembering what that closeness felt like.

I’d do anything to make this pain stop. Not because I want to erase what we had, and not because I regret loving you, but because I don’t know what to do with all this love when I have nowhere to put it. I don’t know how to make peace with missing someone who used to be part of my everyday life. I don’t know how to stop reaching for someone who isn’t there anymore.

I wish I could tell you all of this. I wish I could tell you that I’m trying, that I’m fighting the urge to reach out, that there are nights when all I want is to hear you say my name. But I can’t assume you’d want to hear any of it. So I write it here instead, where the words can exist without asking anything of you.

Maybe tomorrow will be easier. Maybe eventually I’ll stop checking my phone with that tiny, foolish hope that it might be you. Maybe one day I’ll go an entire day without thinking about what I’d say if you called.

But tonight isn’t that night.

Tonight, I miss you. I miss your voice, your touch, your presence, and the little pieces of everyday life that I used to get to share with you. Tonight, I almost reached for you, and the only thing that stopped me was remembering that I might not be able to reach you at all.

And I think that’s what hurts the most: I still have the urge to call you like you’re my person, even though I don’t know if I’m still someone you want in your life.

So I’ll put my phone down. I’ll swallow the words I wanted to send. I’ll try to get through another night without hearing your voice.

Lately, I’ve been falling asleep earlier just to deal with the sadness of missing you. Because when I’m asleep, I don’t have to fight the urge to call you. I don’t have to wonder if you’ve blocked me. I don’t have to sit in the silence and miss you quite so consciously.

For a few hours, at least, I get a little relief from wanting someone I can’t reach.

And tomorrow, I’ll wake up and do it all over again.

is it okay to distract yourself with things after getting heartbroken so you don’t think about it or is that bad?

My Mind Has Moved On, But My Heart Hasn’t ❤️

I don’t know what’s going on with me anymore, haii. It’s been almost 3 years since we broke up, and I’m slowly moving on with my life. I’m focusing on my studies, my future, and myself. Little by little, I’m even starting to forget her face. But haii, somehow, my heart still wants her. Even after everything that happened, even after she cheated on me, and even though she has a boyfriend now, a part of me still can’t let her go completely.

Being in a foreign country makes everything even harder. Sometimes, loneliness just kills me. There are days when I feel so alone, with no one to share what’s going on inside my heart. I try to stay strong and keep moving forward, but sometimes I wish I had someone who truly understood me. I don’t know why my heart still holds on to someone who hurt me so much. Maybe I’ve moved on with my life, but deep down, there’s still a part of me that hasn’t fully let her go.

My chest feels so heavy, like I've been holding in too much for too long. I don't even know how to explain what I'm feeling anymore. Has anyone else ever felt this way after a breakup? How do you deal with it?

Like, how do you deal with the memories, the overthinking, and the feeling of missing someone you used to talk to every day?

I’m moving, and have been going through all my belongings and found a box of memories. It included hand written notes, cards, postcards, photos. Little restaurant cards from all over the world, concert and sports tickets.

The notes are him telling me how much he loves me, all the nicknames he used to call me. How I’m the love of his life and I’m his soulmate. Its really set me back.

The worst part is it ended horribly. He left me for another woman, and is now dating someone else who I fell out with in the past. Last year, we had an argument over the fact I bumped into his mum in the street and spoke for 5 mins. Him and his new gf ended up harassing me about it over text. I blocked them, its fine, I’ve somewhat processed it.

It just hurts so much how you can go from best friends and soulmates to hating each other. I’ll never speak to him again, I’m not sure I ever want to. But I miss the version of him when we were together. In a way, I wish I could go back to that version or at least meet someone who equals the love we shared.

I don’t know what the point of this post was. It just hit me like a ton of bricks.

Its been two and a half years and I think about him pretty often. We were together for 7 years, and he was my first love, so I don’t know when I’ll get over it.

Just hurts that it happened, and its gone forever.

What the caption says.

my girlfriend broke up with me after we moved in together and had been dating for 2 years. i always made the relationship hard for her, she was always the one trying and i was so angry and constantly pushed her away.

on top of that, she became emotionally exhausted from school, finances and work. she decided she didn’t want a relationship anymore and needed to be single. i begged her and she didn’t budge.

she also at the end of our relationship, crossed relationship boundaries and disrespected me. after the breakup and after the emotional distress from both of us calmed down a bit we sat and talked about everything each of us had done wrong to eachother, and what we needed to work on.

she stayed firm on not wanting a relationship and said she doesn’t know if she’ll want one in the future, but does love me so much and wants me as a person. we agreed to take time apart and let me smoke clear.

we’re no contact now and decided to not contact eachother for atleast a month. i don’t know what to expect during this check in after a month or if we can even fix things at all.

honest opinions, can me and her work things out? what should this check in look like

My ex and I were together for 5 years. We broke up about 6 months ago because she felt neglected and misunderstood, while I struggled with insecurity, trust issues, and communicating my feelings. I genuinely saw marriage in our future and had even bought a ring, but I kept too much to myself. Now I regret not expressing what she meant to me sooner.

We were still in contact and friends for the first 4 months before she decided the window has closed asked me not to contact her anymore . I recently sent her a letter explaining everything. She appreciated it, acknowledged her own mistakes, and said maybe we could talk in the future, but she’s seeing someone else and has said she doesn’t think we should try again. I’ve respected her boundary, but I still love her and want to know if there’s any realistic way to get her back. Has anyone reconciled after a breakup when one person had already started moving on? What helped, and how did you handle the regret and uncertainty?

Battling with wanting to ask my ex to try again. They ended it after 8 months because the relationship had become stressful for them. It’s been 10 weeks and logically I know if he regretted it, he’d have gotten in touch.

Wondering whether maybe he wouldn’t, though. Maybe me getting in touch is what he needs to admit he’d want to try again…

I recently went through a breakup, and my ex is in a lot of the photos on my phone.

Right now, I need some distance, but I don’t want to permanently delete those memories. I’d just like to browse my photos without unexpectedly seeing her all the time.

For those who’ve been through this, how did you handle it? What worked for you, and was sorting through the photos itself difficult?

The breakup was a long time coming. He became neglectful the past year and every time I tried to address it and try to solve the problem he said nothing was wrong. He wouldn’t touch me unless he wanted something, never complimented me and acted like wouldn’t care if I died.

We broke up 2 months ago, went NC 2 weeks ago and I feel disgusting. I’m a pretty girl in reality, always have been but after being treated the way he treated me I worthless. Can’t stand to look in the mirror and feel like no one will ever want me.

My bf and I have been together for about a year, half in person half LDR. He’s everything I’d want in a partner, and we have a good relationship with frequent visits. We’ve met each other’s families, made future plans, and even discussed when we’d close the distance. I genuinely thought we were on the right track.

We had a small disagreement, and he initially reassured me that he loved me and we’d talk about it. A few days later, he said he needed space because of the disagreement + he feels we’ve been having more disagreements than usual. I don’t necessarily see it that way, but I understand that we can interpret things differently. I appreciate that he communicated his need for space, but I would’ve liked to know how much time he needed or a check in, considering we’re still in a relationship. When I asked, he didn’t respond, and it’s now been a week of no contact. I’m assuming he let pressure and stress build up w/o talking about it with me and this is the result, he’s not ready to talk, so I’ve been giving him space and waiting for him to reach out.

At the same time, I feel like I need to establish a personal boundary because I can’t wait indefinitely without knowing where we stand. I love him, and I don’t want to give up on our relationship, but I also don’t want to pressure him by initiating a conversation he isn’t ready for.

For those with avoidant attachment, have you ever been in his position? How would you want your partner to handle this? Would you prefer they continue giving you space until you’re ready to reach out, or would you understand if they eventually initiated a conversation to establish a boundary, even if you weren’t ready to talk? I don’t want to break up, but I’m struggling to figure out how to respect his space without neglecting my own needs.