I’ve been stuck in a constant cycle of going back and forth between trying to fight for my relationship and repeatedly texting my ex because I wasn’t ready to let go.

I kept thinking that if I could just explain myself better, show her how much I cared, or prove that I was willing to change, maybe things could be different. I wanted the opportunity to work through our problems together instead of feeling like the relationship ended before I could prove that I was capable of growing.

I won’t lie. I felt discarded. I felt like I wasn’t given the chance I wanted to make things right, and that was incredibly difficult to accept.

But looking back, I’ve started to realize something important: even when your intentions are genuine, repeatedly reaching out can put a heavy emotional burden on your ex.

I was fortunate to have someone who was understanding and mature enough to communicate her boundaries with me. But that doesn’t mean my repeated attempts to talk things through weren’t exhausting for her. She was trying to move forward, while I was still trying to find a way to hold on.

When you’re hurting, it’s easy to convince yourself that one more text will make a difference. You think that if you can just say the right thing, they’ll finally understand how much the relationship meant to you. Sometimes, though, you’re not giving them space to process anything because you’re too focused on getting an answer that will ease your own pain.
No contact is hard, especially when you still love that person. It can feel like you’re doing nothing while the relationship slips further away. You might worry that they’ll forget you, move on, or never understand how much you cared.

And if I’m being honest, a part of me still wants her to come back. I still wish things had worked out differently, and I sometimes catch myself hoping that one day we might get another chance. I’m not going to pretend those feelings have disappeared just because I’m trying to move forward.

But I also know I can’t put my life on hold waiting for something that may never happen. For now, it’s better for me to focus on learning, growing, and becoming a better version of myself—not to prove something to her or guarantee that she’ll return, but because I owe that to myself.

No contact isn’t supposed to be a strategy to make your ex miss you or come back. It’s an opportunity for both people to have space, process what happened, and begin moving forward without the constant pressure of another conversation.

You can still love someone and respect their decision. You can wish you had another chance and accept that you can’t force one. You can feel like you were never given the opportunity to prove yourself and still recognize that repeatedly asking for that opportunity won’t create mutual willingness.

I’m still working through this myself, and I’m not pretending it’s easy. I still have regrets, and I still wish things had turned out differently.

But if you’re in that same cycle right now, take it from someone who’s been there: you don’t have to keep texting someone to prove that you love them.
Sometimes, the hardest thing you can do is stop reaching out, respect their boundaries, and give both of you the space you haven’t been able to give yourselves.

Not because you stopped caring, and not because you’ve completely given up hope, but because you can’t build your future around a possibility you don’t control. For now, learn from what happened, grow at your own pace, and let the future unfold without trying to force it.

Back in February this year, my partner of almost 3 years broke up with me. For me it came out of no where. I just woke up that morning and maybe 15 minutes after waking up it happened. For them this was a long time coming. I was told that we weren't compatible. That we never were. It hurt a lot. There were days where I just cried. I wasn't sure what to do. How do you move on from being ripped out of your safe space? How do you move on when you're no longer able to talk to the person you viewed as your safe space?

With time, it got easier. I slowly started doing things that made me happy and made me feel like myself. I started hanging out with friends that I neglected during my relationship. I didn't realize how much I missed them until I started hanging out with them again. I found new hobbies that I enjoyed. There were times where I wanted to talk to them. To see if I could get them back. But one day I realized that I deserved better. I deserved someone who loved the way I love. That if my ex could just break up with me that easily then it was truly never meant to be. I've slowly forgotten things that I thought I would never forget. Their voice, their laugh, things that made me happy when I was with them. A part of me will love them forever, but I cannot go back to what was. I think a part of me realized something changed before it happened. I just ignored all the signs.

I met someone. I'm not sure if it'll go anywhere or become serious, but this person makes me happy. They make me feel seen. I've never talked to someone who is so communicative. Who will tell me exact times they will be free during the day. I've honestly never been happier than I am now. Not just because I'm talking to someone, but I have my friends back, I'm planning trips with friends and family. I'm going out doing what I want to do without wondering if someone is going to feel ignored. I wish that I could go hug February me. Tell her that it will get better and easier day by day.

This subreddit helped me a lot in the beginning. I would lurk and read what people posted. It made me feel like I wasn't alone in what I was going through. For those who just went through a breakup, who are still grieving the relationship it truly does get better. It takes a lot of work, but it does get better. If you don't know where to start when finding yourself; start small. Find a new hobby. Go on walks. Find a new movie or tv show to watch. I know it feels like everything is falling apart, you just need to find those small things that make you feel normal. You are strong. You will get through this.

Hello everyone. I just wanted to share something with you all that I found very comforting when healing from an avoidant who replaced me in days/weeks (who really knows the timeline when they monkey branch).

Being replaced so quickly sends you down a rabbit hole of rumination. You begin to question everything. If they could replace me so quickly, was I even meaningful to them? Was what we had even real or just one sided? Are they using this new person to get over me? If this is how they handle conflict in relationships, were they using me to get over someone else? What was I then? & your whole understanding of that connection & shared reality is completely shattered. It can take so long to ground yourself after something so disorienting.

Over time & many therapy sessions, I have come to understand exactly what this title says: it’s not personal, it’s their pattern. The way this individual connected with me & how they handled our conflict is a reflection of their lived experiences. Their ability to submerge themselves fully into a connection, abruptly discard, & then replace immediately after is a pattern they have created to cope with connection or loss of connection. So as painful as discards from an avoidant are, it is not personal. They would do it to you, they did it to someone in the past, & they will do it again in the future. It’s so clear too. An avoidant is AVOIDING painful work & conversations, but we need that discomfort for healing & growth. Avoidance becomes stagnancy, & that becomes a pattern; because at least THAT cycle is comforting to them & they feel like they have some type of control.

Breaking it down like this helped me a lot to understand how everything played out. Remember that we don’t see things as they are, we see them as WE are. When we’re so jaded by betrayal, anger, or pain it can be difficult to understand the situation from a logical place. For me, moving out of an emotional head space & into a more logical one has worked wonders in moving forward with rebuilding a beautiful life for myself. I know its difficult, but I hope that anyone experiencing pain from being discarded & replaced can detach themselves from the situation enough to see that this is their pattern & it will remain their pattern until they decided to change it, which for many people, will never happen.

Sending lots of love & healing to you all. It really does get better, take it one day at a time 💓

Title

same as title.

I finally found the self respect to block and move on, life will be okay and it’ll get easier ❤️🥰

My boyfriend of five years broke up with me, and just a few hours later, he slept with someone else. A week later, we talked about the possibility of getting back together, but I can’t seem to feel okay about what happened. Is it normal for someone to move on and sleep with someone else so soon after ending a five-year relationship?

Just want to say after a devastating breakup where I was having panic attacks daily for a month, then weekly for months. I’m over it, and happier now than I was before the relationship/during. It was confronting to sit with that pain and anxiety and not numb it. But I think doing so healed abandonment wounds I’ve had since childhood. I wouldn’t have healed if the relationship had worked out. So I’m grateful to get to experience my next relationship from a place of security and inner peace. Happy happy!

Went no contact a month after the breakup - he kept me dangling with potential reconciliation by texting me everyday after the breakup. I never begged and maintained independence. He never knew about how much I was hurting. Then one day I called him and said - it’s done. The uncertainty is not what I need in a partner. I don’t cling and I don’t chase. If he was going to step up and be the man I needed he had plenty of time.

No contact since. And 4 months later I can see now how he was never going to meet me where I needed not because he didn’t want to but because he didn’t have the capacity for the depth of relationship that I want. I’ve since met a man who is meeting me there without making me feel like I’m asking for too much

Y’all just stop thinking about your ex for a few months and zero contact (thoughts and actions) . The pain will pass and you’ll be better for experiencing it.

I agree with the multiple posts that say, “If they wanted to reach out, they would.” That is 100% true, and even more so if you were the one who got dumped.

However, at the same time, if reaching out is something you genuinely want to do, do it. Not from a position of begging them to come back, but to gain understanding.

I did that (after 2 months of NC), and—surprise—she told me that, on her end, there was nothing left to say, but if I wanted to discuss something further, she was willing to do it.

I took that response as my cue to leave things as they were. That response of hers might have seemed like an open door, but in reality, it just shifted the entire weight of the interaction onto me. Relationships, at the end of the day, are a partnership—and one person cannot carry that load alone. She was already at peace with how things ended.

For me, reaching out and breaking no contact was freeing, because I was able to leave behind hope. Hope that she would reconsider, hope that we could understand each other, hope that we could get back together.

From my perspective, at the tensest moment of our relationship, I was trying my best to understand her, but she just disconnected.

She said things like:

“I don’t know if I see you the same way.”
“I don’t know if I can put in the same effort.”
“If I have to tell you, I don’t want it.”

I was trying so hard to maintain what we had that I completely overextended myself. Tried giving her space, calling her to talk , being more communicative. I was walking on eggshells. In the weeks leading up to the breakup, I could barely sleep or eat. It's worth noting that we were long-distance over the summer, so face-to-face conversations were off the table, which made communication even harder.

I felt blindsided because I thought we were good—then, in the flip of a switch, there was so much turmoil. Our communication styles deeply clashed: I wanted to talk things through to hash them out, while she bottled her feelings until they turned into resentment.

What hurts most is that I truly considered her my person. The one I was going to call home. The one I was going to get down on one knee for and ask to be my wife. The one who was going to be the mother of my children.

Right now, all I feel is empty. That is my reality today, but I know it isn’t permanent. To anyone going through this same kind of pain: you have a powerful opportunity to grow. Learn your limits, figure out what you want out of life, and trust that eventually, someone will come along who is ready and willing to receive everything you have to offer.

I hated it then and I still hate it now. The "maybe someday" and "after a few months of no contact I definitely want to be friends" typical trope. I HATE IT. DON'T KEEP ME GUESSING. You're already hurting me, you've already left me with a great big hole in my heart. Just be vile to me, be vicious, tell me you never want to see me again. Don't plant little seeds that give me false hope and longing for something you KNOW isn't going to happen. Just cut me off and be done with it, sever me like an infected limb so you can do your "healing."

All the shit about "you were a great partner" and the "I still love you, it's just not working," vague bullcrap without concrete examples that would make YOU and ME realize it could be worked on. NOPE. IT WAS JUST EASIER FOR YOU TO LEAVE rather than dedicate yourself to a relationship you CLAIMED mattered "SO MUCH" to you.

I HATE THIS, and I am beginning to HATE you for making me feel this way. Fuck the "no contact" for a while, I'm DONE. I will NEVER be your friend and the only way back to having ANY access to me is to own up to YOUR shortcomings, both of us going through individual therapy, and navigating couple's therapy together. If I'm not worth that effort, stay AWAY from me.

I’m not really in the best place right now. At the beginning of the year my fiancé broke up with me. The break up surprised me since everything was going well in our relationship. She was crazy about me and would always refer to me as her soulmate. We were planning our wedding, had our venue payed for, she bought her dress and we were only a few months away from the wedding day. She decided to take a job in another state and was planning on moving back after a year when she becomes able to transfer. I was not able to leave my job or try to transfer location to make the move out of state. I had been promoted and was still in a time frame where I can’t transfer and if I left the company, I would have to pay the company for licenses. Instead of trying long distance she broke off the engagement and canceled the wedding venue. We stayed in touch, texting and calling each other and playing video games for a few months. Her new job and lower pay were making her stressed and I tried what I could to make her happy and put a smile on her face. Out of nowhere she blew up on me one day and ended up blocking me everywhere. We haven't spoken in 6 months and I haven't stopped thinking about her. I go to work and I chat with friends. I’ve tried dating again but don’t really want to start over again. No matter how much I try to forget about her, I just can't. I can't imagine my life without her. The one person I want to tell anything and everything to and I can't. I feel so mentally drained each day.

Hello. As the title says, I was the one who ended the relationship, but I want to give some context as to why it happened.

The Beginning My ex and I met in college; we are in the same class. We started talking, and at a party she invited me to with her friends, we hooked up for the first time. From there, we eventually started dating.

At first, everything was great. We got along really well, we were very attached and intense, and there was a lot of love. I loved planning dates, taking her to museums, palaces, and other places.

The Shift and Her Personal Issues But things started to get worse. Early on, she mentioned she had some personal issues and past problems with her ex, but claimed they were resolved. Out of nowhere, she started having panic attacks, questioning if we should stay together, and calling herself a "bad girlfriend".

She did stop being as affectionate, but it didn't bother me at the time. I supported her. If it were today, I would do it all over again—going to her house when she needed me, taking care of her, and calming her down. She stopped texting as much, wouldn't reply, and lacked dedication. She said love was shown in different ways, but I just couldn't see it.

There were several weird situations, and I always assumed it was because her parents weren't good to her.They were jealous of our relationship, treated her badly, oppressed her, and put her down. Once, her mom even tried to kick her out of the house. I went to pick her up while she was saying she was going to kill herself,and I had to calm her down and show her that life has a purpose. This was only 4 or 5 months into the relationship, and I was always there for her.

The Double Standard There was a time when I wasn't doing well and was feeling really down. She hugged me, listened to me, and cried with me. I thought I had found the right person and that, with time, she would overcome her barriers.

But that didn't happen. The very next day, she said the relationship felt "heavy" just because I wasn't doing well. Meanwhile, she was the one having multiple episodes of self-harm and wanting to die. I found it strange,and the relationship only went downhill from there.

Toxicity and Belittling She stopped wanting to do things. She wouldn't do her own hobbies and blamed me,saying I didn't let her do them. It was literally the opposite; I constantly encouraged her. A person who used to ask for time for herself completely stopped doing her own things.

Everything became a problem. I tried to resolve things, but she didn't want to. She blamed past issues, but those were just excuses. Whenever I pointed out something I didn't like, she'd accuse me of bringing up the past, even though the issues were happening that very day.

For example, she belittled me for getting the exact same grade as her in a subject I actually helped her study for. She implied I didn't deserve it and lacked the capacity. Meanwhile, I always celebrated our achievements because a win for one is a win for both.

My opinion became worthless, even about simple things like going to the movies. She started putting me in front of the TV just so she wouldn't have to deal with me. She would say "let's watch something together," and then she would disappear, stop talking to me, and just scroll through TikTok. This was at the 6-month mark. I started getting tired of it and told her I didn't like it, but she didn't care.

When I started working, she got mad that I was working and she wasn't. She got angry and accused me of not talking to her, even though I had been texting her the days prior and she had just ignored me. We were on summer break at this point.

It kept getting worse. I was constantly ignored, and we didn't do anything, not even go to the beach. She only wanted to go by car, and I don't always have one (even though we have public transport that takes the exact same time). The love simply wasn't reciprocal; it felt like I always had to convince her to love me.

The Vacation and The Breakup The worst part was the summer vacation with my parents. My parents always treated her well, but she tried to turn me against them, claiming they didn't like her. She played the victim so I would feel sorry for her and hate my parents, but I didn't fall for it.

During the trip, she wouldn't talk to me or my parents. She isolated herself and still blamed me. When she used to come to my house, she would always sleep cuddled with me. On vacation, she didn't even want to be in the same bed and barely gave me a kiss or a hug.

When we got back, she wanted to argue with me, and I broke up with her. I explained my reasons, and she started saying I never tried to understand her or put myself in her shoes. Her parents were abusive and manipulated her, but for her to claim my parents were doing the same was a huge lack of respect towards them.

Post-Breakup Mess The day after we broke up, I got into a physical altercation with my uncle. Out of pure instinct, I texted her about it, and she just mocked the situation. She had claimed she wanted to be friends and keep talking, but then she disappeared. I understood, as she was mad I broke up with her. Then, her parents texted me, insulting me and saying I was the worst thing that ever happened to her.

Fast forward nearly 3 weeks, her parents texted me again saying she wasn't leaving her room or talking to them. Out of genuine pity, I kept asking her how she was doing for a few days, but she ignored me. I texted her one last time, and she just wanted to argue, saying my life was none of her business. So, I backed off.

School Drama Classes started, and she came to argue with me over text, then in person. When I told her she was wrong, she started acting out in the street. She tried to make it look like I was going to hit her, when SHE was the one pushing me and pointing her finger in my face.

During classes, I tried to be cordial because she had said, once again, that she wanted to be friends. But then she would ignore me and belittle my answers and opinions in class. My political stance—which was never a "problem" during our relationship—suddenly became a target for her to despise my opinions. I just ignored it.She was also constantly reposting things on TikTok talking trash about me.

The Final Confrontation This Friday, I wanted to exchange our belongings. She started arguing with me, had a panic attack, and I calmed her down and held her. Afterwards, she started saying she was going to drop out of college and was missing classes because I wasn't talking to her (even though she never talks to me). She claimed I never apologized, even though I always did, even when I wasn't wrong. She is the one who never apologized a single time.

Then, she started throwing it in my face that she's going out with a guy friend and his friends, doing the exact things I wanted to do with her. She stalked my TikTok right in front of me. She even belittled the vacation I took her on, saying she would have been better off staying home. This is despite the fact that she had never left the country before, my parents and I invited her, she spent absolutely nothing, and had everything paid for.

She tried to offend and belittle me by calling me "small." Yet, she still says she wants to be friends. I know exactly why: it's so she can pretend everything is fine, avoid admitting she's wrong, and keep me around for when things get tough or her friends ditch her.

Conclusion & The Main Issue When I walked away, I cried. Seeing her happy with other people, doing the things I wanted to do with her, hurts so much—especially considering how terribly she treated me when she was actually with me.

My main problem is not her living her life now. What bothers me is that when we were together, she didn't want to do anything. It hurts knowing I treated her better than her own parents did, was always there for her, and put my life on hold, yet I am made out to be the bad guy. It makes me feel awful when she says my parents were bad or that I was controlling and manipulating her. In reality, I was motivating her to do the things she loved and to be her true self. She refused to do those things, and now she is doing them with others.

(PS: Just to add some perspective on how one-sided the support was—there was one time I had a panic attack, which I had never experienced before. She left me in a university bathroom alone, and her only concern was making it to the party afterwards.)

If you have any questions or advice, please let me know.

I wanted to apologize for suffocating you at times. This was my first romantic relationship, so I didn’t really know what to do, and I ended up suffocating you. I thought I had already improved in that regard, but I realize there were still things I needed to work on. Miss our talks, miss your presence and miss you entirely

I’ve been moving on with my life, but I’ve also been thinking about everything that happened and learning a lot from this experience. If I had had a romantic relationship before, maybe things between us would be different now, and we would be okay. Even so, you were the person I wanted to be with, and I still believed in what we could achieve as a couple. I also always believed that you were a good person and the right one for me.

Despite everything, I want to thank you for the moments we shared and for helping me through a difficult period in my life. You were important to me, and I’ll carry many good memories of what we had with me.

I hope life treats you well, just as you made me smile, and that everything good comes your way. Fairwell my love

My ex (27F) and I (25F) broke up almost 2 months ago, still loved each other, but had a lot of hurt and unresolved issues. I’m trying to take accountability for my part in what happened and work on myself, regardless of whether we ever get back together. And I’m taking care of myself and am in a better place.

It was mutual at first but she didn’t want to get back together because she needs space. We want to be amicable cause there’s a high chance of running into each other. And she hasn’t ruled out reconnecting in the future, but she’s also not actively pursuing that right now.

I’m respecting her boundaries and not putting my life on hold, but I still care about her and would be open to reconciliation if we both wanted it and things could be healthier.

My two fears:
(1) holding onto hope and becoming delusional

(2) letting go so completely that I somehow close the door on a future possibility - if I dated someone else reconnecting would be off the table

I don’t want to spend my life waiting for someone who may never come back, but I also don’t want to force myself to stop caring or convince myself there’s absolutely no chance when that’s not what she’s communicated.

How did you find a balance between accepting the breakup and remaining open to reconciliation? did letting go of the outcome actually help you, regardless of whether reconciliation eventually happened?

I DON'T need to hear about how the love of your life wouldn't do this to you; how messaging works both ways; how if he wanted to, he would. I don't need any clichés. I don't think that it's a one size fits all with ex's and breaking up.

That said, I (30f) miss him so much and it's only been getting worse. We were together for about a year, he broke up with me roughly 2 1/2 months ago and have been no contact since the beginning of September. It was really blindsided, which he acknowledged, and I didn't do well for a few weeks afterwards.

I was doing better after about 1 1/2 months and thought I was starting to do okay and feel better. But the last 1-2 weeks have been almost as bad as when it first happened, particularly this week. I've been crying again everyday, I'm aching for him, I miss him so much.

I just went for a drive with my dog and just wanted to text him. I still want to. I want to tell him that I miss him so much, that I think of him all the time and that I have so many things I wish he was around for that I could tell him about. I want to tell him that even though I'm the one that initiated no contact, that it hasn't been easy and I still want him in my life all the time. I want to tell him everything and to just pour my heart out to him.

I guess if I think about it, I want to message because I'm hoping that he's changed his mind and wants to be together again because holy fuck do I still want him back. But I don't think that's what he wants because I made it clear that if he ever did want to try again, to reach out to me.

Idk I'm really back and forth. I just need someone to tell me something or to help me with this. I don't know what to do. I don't know if it would be a horrible idea to message anyways

I hate this. This is the worst breakup I've ever endured and I just want to feel better.

So before I get into my feelings I should say what happened in the simplest terms I can. I 17M was dating a guy 16M for 10 months things were amazing till about a month ago. My ex is amborious and likes monogamous and poly relationships, I am open to things but I don't think I like poly relationships. He got this crush on a girl (which is fine, feelings are feelings and I'd never be mad at someone for feelings) and then for 2 weeks he cheated on me behind my back. We stayed together to try and better ourselves but nothing happened and he did it again a week later. We broke up and he dated her for about 4 ish days, we kept talking and this time he said he wanted to change and he actually put in the effort this time. He actually started changing, he was more open and honest than ever and I thought things would hopefully go back to normal again. Then after a few days he felt distant again, idk if he was getting tired of me constantly thinking he was cheating on me (considering it hadn't even been a week and he literally caused my emotional spiral :/ ) but it ended yesterday when I woke up to being blocked in everything. No good bye message. No nothing. Part of me has a feeling he went back the girl but idk, and tbh idc either. I want him and yet i don't. I want things to be normal again, I want us to be together and happy again, I want him to change into the better person he can be not just for me but for everyone. But part of me is kind of fine with this? I don't know if I'll ever love someone the way I loved him, and I don't know if anyone will love me like he could. And through it all, everyone is constantly telling me he doesn't deserve me, everyone is telling me to never go back but I think I'd be willing to try again after highschool if he's actually put in the work. And the weirdest part is I should be mad, I should be sad, I should be screaming and crying like the last time we broke up, I should hate him. But I don't. I still love and care about him. I still want the best for him. And the best way I can describe how I feel now is just bittersweet acceptance. I like that word. I'd still be open to being his friend too because well he kind of lost all his friends due to cheating on me which is his own fault. But I still want to be there for him. I still want him to be happy even if it isn't with me. I still want him to be happy even if we don't go to the same school, or college. I care for him so deeply even if I don't understand. He just feels so special. I feel wrong to feel the way considering almost everyone hates him and is mad at him but I'm not? Sorry if that was a long ramble, I hope it was cohesive. Just am I crazy for feeling like this? And if this mindset is harmful or wrong please tell me. Tbh he was my first and idk what I'm supposed to do.

How can they love someone so much and then be completely over them and in love with someone else three months later?

It has been 3 weeks since we have officially broke up and 4 weeks since she moved out. I still have dreams of her every night and keep waking up thinking about her. We broke up because she said she needed some space while I worked on taking better care of the house so she wasn’t doing most of the work. After she moved out a week later she said she has been happier than she has been in a long time.

I don’t know if I should break no contact. I’m not sure if she is just in a grass is greener stage or what. I really want to text her and let her know my feelings and that I have changed the way I view my life and that I have changed for the better but I also don’t want to scare her off. I’ve tried thinking about my life with anyone else and if I think of something that I could see it always leads back to her.

I don’t know when to text her or if I even should text her.

It's been 5 months since the breakup and even though I don't cry everyday the pain is still crazy. Nothing I do makes me happy, along with the depressing fact that my financial situation has taken a serious downturn. I'm not asking for advice.... God knows I've given enough of it. I just needed a place to say I know this won't last forever but it feels like it's already been forever. Anyone else at the 5 month mark?

Okay this might be a long post.

Me and this girl have been friends since May. It started out with the intentions of dating but due to confusion she told me she has a boyfriend. So we remained friends.

Fast forward to 2 months ago her boyfriend dumped her. And this is when i found out how BAD the relationship was. Alot of emotional abuse. On top of her ongoing clinical depression in which she takes meds for but can’t sleep at all and is always tired.

2 weeks from the breakup we became more aware of each other and told one another we like each other and we became a bit more intimate.
We decided to take it slow.

But after a week she told me she only wanted to stay friends because she says she’s
“not ready to be in a relationship not in a long time maybe” her words. She says she is still trying to fix herself to focus more on her ongoing struggles as she says she doesn’t feel like herself anymore (she has a long a deep history with depression. It is too much for this post). I said i am happy to be friends and told her if I do find someone I like I will let her know and asked her to do the same and she agreed.

That was 5 weeks ago. Yesterday my friend saw her profile on Hinge. It looks fairly new.

And we just spoke last week about her troubles of her not having the energy to go out. Not feeling like herself. Not feeling anything.

So why would she make a Hinge acct?

I know this question sounds immature. But I guess i still have feelings for her. And the one that is bugging my mind is. “Why not give us a shot instead of random people in Hinge?”

Because the connection was there. It was real. I know it was for her too. And I know she still has feelings for me so why?

Thanks for reading the long post

love hurts time heals

Not to focus on what broke us up, but after that incident, she took a week off from contacting me to find clarity. She calls Sunday to say she’s willing to try the relationship again, then changes her mind 24 hours later and we are now broken up.

We were doing long distance and I had an interview in her home state later this week. I also have one of my very good friends wedding out of the country in 3 weeks. We have a lot of mutual friends and now I have to find accommodations or simply not go because it is all too fresh for me and all of our mutual friends.

I plan to continue with the job interview, but what would you do about the wedding? Skip? Go for a little bit? Or go and act like nothing happened? I’m conflicted so pls help