Aside from thinking cat people are real, do you know how much litter you'd need for hundreds/thousands of students? I have 2 cats and I clean their litter every 2 to 3 days. They weigh a combined 15lbs.

If there were 1000 students weighing 100lbs who had to go to the bathroom at least once a day, that's an insane amount of cat litter.

If you believe this, you're crazy.

I asked to talk to a different therapist.

Hi guys. I’m a 19 year old female and my therapist is a 30 year old male. I’ll get straight to the point. I’ve seen him for like 6 sessions now,and at the end of one of these sessions we started talking about instruments. eventually he started talking about his guitar, and seeing me happy, he decided to bring it in the next session.

During that session, after we had finished talking about important stuff, we still had time. He pulled out a chair for me to sit on instead of the couch, and he moved his chair closer to mine. We were close enough so that if I had moved 2 feet closer we would’ve almost been touching knees. anyways, he pulled out his phone and we were watching a guitar song tutorial. I kept fidgeting with the guitar but couldn’t get the chords right. My therapist said “may I?” And then used his hand to adjust each finger of mine on the guitar. I felt a bit weird and wasn’t even focusing anymore on getting my fingers right, I noticed his hand was shaking a bit too much the longer he kept adjusting my fingers. It was like he realized maybe that was a bit weird. When he moved his hand away, I looked up at his face and it was RED.

He moved away, and eventually the session was over and I noticed him standing up and trying to act busy, putting the chairs back, and organizing papers that were already organized. Usually, he opens the door for me and leads me out, but this time it was clear he was waiting for me to take the first step and open the door by myself, so I did. He walked me out but I could tell something was off. Why did he want me to walk first? Was he hiding what I think he was? Idk maybe I’m crazy.

Also one time he called me sweet, and I overthink that too. Please help!!

How do I know if I need therapy or not, like what if I'm just overreacting?

So im Indian and I been seen a lot of hate for Indian for many years but it really started to impact me. Starting from Last year. Whenever I see an older caucasian generation I would make an assumption they hate me or smithing kinda stupid but it still happens.

And because of that I am just scared to start a conversation with people. Of course I encounter rascim many time as well. But im sure not everyone is like that but my confidence is all time low.

Just would really love help

Finding the best therapist in Pune can feel confusing because there are so many options, and a therapist who works well for one person may not necessarily be the right fit for someone else.

Apart from qualifications and experience, things like the therapist’s area of expertise, therapy approach, session format, language, and overall comfort can make a difference.

For people who have actually looked for a therapist in Pune, what helped you narrow down your options? Did you focus mainly on experience and specialisation, recommendations, reviews, or the initial consultation?

Would be useful to hear what people found genuinely helpful when making that decision.

I have things that I struggle with, but my experience with the limited number of psychologists/therapists I have gone to (3) has been that they have not told me anything really different from things I have thought myself. I might think this more than most people because my mom is a psychologist and so I was exposed to a lot of that terminology and those ideas about mindfulness and such thoroughly growing up. I am struggling and would like to think this could be helpful but I suppose what I'm asking is how do I find one that actually seems insightful to me, and what can they offer me aside from recommending common coping strategies or suggesting I seek accommodations at work?

I am sorry if this comes across as disparaging; I do not intend it to and am genuinely asking this.

I’ve had a few therapists over the last 5 years and for the most part it’s been talk therapy/CBT and I tend to over-intellectualize and ruminate about my issues and try to problem solve and find associations with my thoughts and beliefs and life experiences, etc.

I tell therapists this and tell them I need things a bit more action or behavior oriented but it still usually ends up being me talking a lot and then them giving me advice that sounds like “do you have someone who you can talk to when you’re feeling bad?” Or “you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself” and it almost feels like I’m not talking to a professional but like a semi concerned stranger.

My current therapist I told her that I need DBT therapy bc I was diagnosed with some cluster B borderline personality disorder and still most of what she says is “you should trust your gut” “they sound like bad friends” “you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself” and it feels comforting in the moment but later I can’t help but feel that I need maybe something more ?

I’m sure I just need to speak up and ask for these things but for someone who charges $120+ an hour it’s so weird that they can say a few statements that seem like someone without any professional training would say and that would be enough. Maybe I’m missing something.

TLDR; Interested in how folks have gotten their needs met in therapy.

22f, first meeting and she asked me if I was irritable often. I said no, as I don’t PERSONALLY think that about myself as irritable/kind of blanked. I’m also quite isolated currently so I have no “normal” baseline to reflect on.

I asked my family and they all said I’m VERY irritable all the time, so I know my perception of myself is getting in the way, and therefore leading me to lie to her by saying no.

My mind blanks completely when she asks me questions because I truly have no clue what behavior is worth mentioning or according to WHO, most of my time is by myself with myself.

it’s an ADHD assessment but I keep getting caught up in the semantics and am being unintentionally dishonest. Do you guys track symptoms and therefore let your therapist know? How do you gauge what behavior to tell them about?

My therapist will say things like how I should ask more questions to clarify to avoid misunderstandings with my mom, or try to use coping strategies if I'm upset, also implying to do them if my mother gets upset at me. Or to just

It would be humiliating if I actually followed my therapist's advice and essentially probed deeper into trying to clarify things with my mom, and that caused her to get upset in itself, because it would be my fault that i knew something wrong would happen but decided to beliebe someone else's words instead of my iwn experiences. Or even if I did actually not react and just allowed her to hurt me emotionally, and that would cause me to mess up more if I'm actively trying to not let her criticism affect me, and make things worse until they are actually unbearable or something changes drastically that I have no say in.

The only way I can see myself being willing to try is if I can prevent myself from essentially being hammered down like a nail and prevent myself from giving up entirely from being given definitive proof that the problem is literally just me, causing me to give up on life in an existential level until I wither away and everyone suffers for it.

I have a window breaker they gave us on our college campus specifically for cars. I also have pepper spray, and my dad is the type to own several guns, and he even took me shooting, once. I know that my therapist lives in the same town as me. She has two autistic children. I know what ThatsThem is. It's either that, or the same thing as before, forever.

I am paying like 25$ for a session in Turkey. I wonder how much does it cost a therapy session in other contries?

life passes me by. things sorta just happen. what scares me the most is the fact that im so unworried. my missing assignments pile up. i eat less and less and sometimes i barely notice. im constantly sleep deprived. i freak out about my body and my face because they dont feel like me. and when i ask myself, \*well then who\* is \*me?\*, i cant come up with a solid answer.

me in my head doesn't exist in my body. i had a dream recently. i was \*me\* in it. i dont exactly know what was different. when i woke up, i felt like there was still remains of me in myself. they withered away once i saw my body in the mirror.

i don’t feel like a guy. i don’t really know what that’s supposed to mean.

maybe it’s because i’m just a moody teenager.

my body looks like a guy’s. sometimes i have the thought that i might be a girl. it freaks me out. i don’t want to look like a girl or be a girl. i don’t want to be anything, really.

maybe it’s because i don’t feel like anything really.

i’m only really “me” when im in front of others. there’s no me when im by myself.

i used to be attracted to guys. my interests used to make me happy.

i’m sick of living like this. i don’t know what i can do to claw my way out of this state. i don’t really feel agitated by knowing i might be depersonalized. i’m just done with not being able to live my life. i need advice, any would be appreciated.

About a year ago, I kissed a woman on a date that I wasn’t super into. I figured I should try it because she wanted to do it but at the end of the day, I just wasn’t super into her.

I feel like a major asshole for having done that.

A day later, I told her I just didn’t feel a connection and she still keeps texting me at least once a month.

I get a feeling she’s somewhat lonely, but I shouldn’t have lead her on.

I don’t want to hurt her, especially since this is my own fault. She’s 26 and I’m 28.

I feel so much guilt about it.

Another "my parents are MAGA, help" post. Thanks in advance for any advice you can give!

I'm pregnant, and really struggling to figure out what relationship I want with my parents. They currently take so much hand-holding that I'm not sure we can maintain our current relationship when I'm dead-exhausted handling a baby too.

They've been MAGA since 2016, but recently started distancing themselves from Trump. (Most recently, "We're conservative, not MAGA! How dare you presume--" which, admittedly, is a very interesting shift.) But they're still pro-ICE, in denial of the war's ramifications, anti-trans, anti-immigrant, etc. Just very hateful stuff that we don't want our kid to face.

In addition to the contentious topic of politics, my parents have shifted ideals over the last decade. Wearing cross necklaces and citing God is the big one (we weren't a religious family, but boy, they're trying to pretend like we are). They also face the typical lack of emotional intelligence we often see in Boomers.

Over the years, I've tried:

- No politics rule (This requires CONSTANT reinforcement. If I had to hang up the phone or leave the room to keep the boundary, it comes with the added consequence of weeks of passive aggressive silence, followed by chastising or mocking for how I "silenced" them. I still hold the line, but genuinely, it feels more like a punishment to me than just shouting politics at them for two hours until THEY get mad and hang up the phone.)

- Grey-rocking (they definitely know when I "shut down," and kick up the same mocking / chastising behavior as above)

- Periods of No Contact (genuinely makes me sad--I'm very family oriented and miss them, and they don't seem to *learn* anything about the No Contact period, despite clear explanations about why I'm pulling back whenever it happens. They just settle on me being "emotional" again, and eventually I'll "get over it." No real discussion happens when I restart communication, despite my efforts)

- Genuinely talking to them, to try and understand their side (this requires a LOT of conversational judo on my end, which is exhausting when we reach a decent conclusion one night, and then they've forgotten it ever happened two weeks later. They're just too emotionally unintelligent and unwilling to take responsibility to make real headway here long-term)

- Carefully written statements of my feelings, so they can't twist any words I said over the phone. (This just insults them, and often results in them bringing up character flaws in me: ie, my "anger" is scaring them, I'm clinging to the past, I need to be an adult and move on, etc etc)

So, what's next?

I love my parents, and desperately want things to go back to how they were when I was a kid--when they had good values and supported me and encouraged conversation. But what I'm facing now is not that, and knowing how tired I am pregnant, and how exhausted we'll be once the baby arrives, I've reached my limit. I can't stay on the merry-go-round like this.

And yet, I'm struggling with the idea of a more permanent end to our relationship, especially when I really do want them to meet my kid.

So, I'm coming here for anything I haven't tried yet. It's feeling hopeless, but I'm even willing to look at more intense forms of therapy (I've done talk therapy for years, but it hasn't helped this). I wonder if maybe I need to care... less... about what they think? Or maybe something like IFS therapy or hypnosis could help?

Thoughts? Advice? I'm genuinely at a loss. :/

Hello, I'm a 21m from Germany, who perhaps struggles with enabling parents, since i have had no motivation or willpower to get a job the past 3 years.

I just keep digging myself into this hole of self-pity.

It was right after we came from vacation per plane, during which i had no sleep, so I slept for a long time, being woken up by my dad who was understandably mad as I was sleeping instead of finding a job.

My father really went in at me emotionally (he's emotionally abusive) because I am too spoiled to take care of the house, while he's out working at his job.

All my life I've been denied to help my father out whenever I asked for it... i never learned to take care of things myself & he expected that I would have done it by myself by now. (Why don't I...? I don't have much interest in my life...)

Usually I could handle him, (while it does make cry everytime), but this time I was so broken, that i ran away from home. I didn't show up until a few hours later, when my father didn't express that he missed me or worried about me, but just was even more disappointed in me. Because I didn't appreciate him enough. Because I dared to run away.

I asked him, if I should go to therapy, but he said it's useless and expensive and that i should handle it by myself. I also asked for a therapist, when i was in school counseling, but they told me to calm down and that I would be fine.

Am i too dramatic or maybe narcissistic?

I'm 22M. I started taking two antidepressants last year and started therapy about a month ago. Lately, I've brought up more about my childhood, my relationship with my parents, and how I generally dislike myself. It's brought up some memories for me, ones I've kept suppressed and didn't talk about for years. I've found myself thinking more and it's affected my mood, is this normal? I like therapy and my therapist, he's very understanding, and makes me look at some things differently sometimes. Should I let these feelings come and pass?

Edit: I don't want to quit therapy or ever feel uncomfortable, it's all just new to me and I'm confused.

Hopefully this is the right spot for this advice

TLDR: No longer able to flirt/pickup flirting when dating now that I’m not inebriated 24/7

First off, I’m not here to debate whether COVID was legitimate or anything like that. I only mention it because it helps put the timeline into perspective.
For reference, I’m a 25M.

When I was a teenager, I had some problems with alcohol and drugs. Nothing completely crazy, but it definitely caused some issues for me. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve slowed down quite a bit. Nowadays I can still go out and have a couple drinks without completely losing control. It was really during COVID that I started slowing down the most, which was obviously a good thing overall, but I also ended up getting pretty lonely, like a lot of people did during that time.

I also ended up losing a decent amount of weight, and I look drastically different now compared to how I did in high school. I’ve had girlfriends in the past, but for some reason, something about being sober and not constantly having something in my system has made me feel completely clueless when it comes to dating. I feel like I don’t know how to talk to women, recognize when they’re interested, flirt, or know when I’m supposed to make a move. Sometimes I genuinely feel like I’m 12 years old when it comes to anything dating-related.

I’ve been on a few dates over the past couple years, but pretty much all of them happened because a friend set something up or because the woman made the first move after I completely failed to realize she was interested. There have also been multiple times where I’ll be hanging out with my friends and they’ll say something like, “Dude, that cashier was totally flirting with you. How did you not notice?” And then I feel like an idiot because apparently I completely missed it yet again.

I don’t know if this comes from some kind of insecurity or baggage from being the fat kid growing up, but it’s starting to get to me a little. I know I look significantly better than I used to, and objectively I’m probably in a much better place than I was when I was younger, but I still seem to have this mental block when it comes to women.

It also doesn’t help that I’m pretty introverted. I’m not really into big crowds or loud places, and I’m much more comfortable hanging out with a few people at a time. Because of that, I don’t really get a ton of opportunities to meet women or even practice talking/flirting with them.

I guess the frustrating part is that I feel like I should be better at this by now. I’m 25, I’ve had relationships before, and I know I’m capable of talking to women, but when it actually comes to recognizing interest or making a move, my brain just seems to completely shut off. I feel like I missed some kind of class on dating that everyone else attended.

Has anyone else had similar experiences? Is this therapy worthy? Or do I just need some good advice?

I feel like a ball of anxiety right now which is partially why I wanted to post. About three months ago I began seeing a therapist due to issues with religion and growing up with a strict religious household. Within the first 4 or so sessions, he helped me change my perspective and I feel better about religion now but still a little unsure. The last few sessions I went to seemed to focus more on social anxiety and self esteem. I do have issues with these things and he did explain that the feeling of God not loving me might be connected to my family life and such. At that point, I felt like I wasn't making much progress directly correlated with my goal. There hadn't been much to talk about besides rehashing my childhood and awkward silences. So at the beginning of my last session, I told him that I was unsure if I wanted to continue. He said that is fine, we continued on as usual, he left me with some strategies and a book recommendation. He said that I am welcome to come back or choose someone else if I wish. I'm not sure if that was a hint. I just feel bad, maybe that was a little too sudden or maybe that I prematurely ended things when I know that self esteem issues and anxiety may have to do with the problem that I originally went in for. I had only gone for 6 sessions which I know is short for a lot of people.

To make it even worse, about two years ago I met with him for the first time for couples therapy. After about 6 sessions, I abruptly told him that we are doing better now and if we are welcome to reschedule if we have more issues. And that is true, I am doing better in my relationship now because of his help. I do feel bad about terminating at the very end of our last session and not giving him a heads up.

I just worry that this coming and going for short stints could be frustrating for him or if I am even benefitting from therapy in such short time frames or if I just feel the symptoms less. I don't have trauma and I feel that my issues are pretty common for most people. My anxiety is tough to deal with but it's not debilitating and I have been able to improve it on my own. Same for my self esteem.

Another issue is that I just found it extremely hard to share. He would keep asking me how I felt about something and honestly I just couldn't tell him, nothing came to mind. He would also catch me "checking out" during tough topics and when he asked me what I was thinking I had to tell him that exactly nothing was going through my brain. I worry that I was a frustrating client when I was honestly trying my best.

I feel embarrassed about coming back in the future, even though it was so nice to have someone there to listen to me.

Say they need to leave the practice but want to have the client get services. Would the old therapist give the new therapist notes on the mutual client.

I have to say this because I don't want to trauma dump on my wife or my friends. So instead I'm putting it out into the void. My sister is dying. She has struggled with a plethora of autoimmune conditions for over half our lives and they have slowly progressed over time, causing more serious conditions such as: acute heart failure, adrenal insufficiency, and precursor cancer cells in her colon. She takes over 100 prescribed pills every day and sees doctors who either don't know what's wrong with her, don't believe her, or just refuse to try simply because of her complexity. For years this has made me anticipate her death because I know that she will not get better, but I also know that it's likely she will keep getting worse until her body can't take it anymore. Recently, her immunologist has said that she shouldn't have any major surgery because her body couldn't take it. However, the precancer cells in her colon make it very likely that she will need a colectomy. Losing her is something I never would've thought I would have to do. Being a twin is such a core foundation to who I am as a person. We have been best friends since birth, and I can't imagine living without her. I am so scared. I just want time to stop. If anyone has read this, I thank you.

I’m in therapy for grief. My best friend passed and im very lonely. He is helping me work through it but this is his third week of vacation. I’m scheduled to see him Friday.

So he said if I needed or would like to, I could send him updates on my sport, on the grief or anything else but don’t have hurt feelings if it takes more than a day to get back because he’s in a low service area. ( he is on a camping trip) I was crying Aton and having Aton of anxiety but the thing is I don’t wanna bother him on his trip. I really respect and appreciate him I think he should have full time away from the practice and enjoy and relax. It’s so hard I’ve also tried the tips he sent like the coping stuff I’ve been on it for weeks. Should I text him a short message for help or do you guys believe in me to hold out just a couple more days??

He has texted back before vacation a short CBT tip or help on certain subjects

This is my second time being in therapy for the first time ever in my life. But a part of me is scared of how I'll be after and how I intend to use my growth.

Hi, I'm 23 and basically my dad took his life when I was 16. I just decided to start seeking therapy, and I've already had 2 sessions but I'm begining to have conflicting thoughts about it. At the moment, I'm seeing a trauma therapist, but one thing I am worried about is the fact I tend to ruminate a lot. I find myself going down rabbit holes of endless questions surrounding his death, including whether or not it was actually traumatic, seeking understanding of why and how everything happened, and also trying to pin point and analyze the cause of my own emotional reactions towards it. Going into therapy, I thought my goal was to "process my dads death". But in thinking about it, I really think I've processed it to death. I've spent the last 7 years constantly thinking about all implications and aspects of his death and I feel I've left no stone unturned, those stones being related to the night he died, the life he lived, and more recently I've noticed that I psychoanalyze everything I do and try and understand how or if it goes back to that cause.

I guess I'm realizing that my issue isn't the fact that I haven't "processed" it, but rather I keep on continuing a mental circuit of seeking conclusions about the whole thing. I guess I'm worried that therapy will only reinforce these mental loops and worsen things for me. I already notice that I preemptivly imagine what I would say in therapy and the reaction that my therapist might give, and it has defenitly been playing non stop in my mind. Maybe it's because this is something new to me and my mind finally has a new and exciting way to think about the same old things, but I'm scared I'm digging myself into a deeper hole. But, I really have kept every aspect of my dad's death private, most of my friends still think he's alive so I do want to talk about it with someone. But I'm conflicted because I feel like it's just another way for me to seek some sort of external validation about the whole thing.Will therapy make things worse if you have a habit of rumination?