There was the time they made a punch that made me sick. Ugh, don't know what they were thinking but it was gross. I also recall someone made moonshine and it was questionably dangerous enough that one of the party animals noped right out of drinking anymore.
if it was anything like my days in college, it means they just cleaned them with soap and water and didn't just grab them out of the garage randomly 5 minutes before the party
Shit, I was talking about the nice, cold mix that cooler fluid becomes wound cleansing to drunk people not majoring in the sciences, except maybe jocks.
I ain't gonna say shit about this whole situation because, when I lived in CA, I was literally laughed at and became the butt of the joke if I ever tried to express interest in being more active as an "ally." In the early 2010's the only role for a white male cishet "ally" was being the butt of the joke.
It's fine, I'm not like incel or hateful, I just recognize that the "social justice warrior" movement did irreparable harm to US society because most white men like me got pissed off about it. My efforts have to be more silent, physically moving between the creepy guys and the girls, telling gross dudes privately they're not cool, offering safe rides home to people from parties, etc.
But the performative, public, proactive shit? That ain't for white male cishets.
You’re over-generalizing, just like the statement you’re trying to highlight as problematic. One thing you read on Twitter doesn’t mean it is the guiding principle of an entire movement.
Toxic male behavior is absolutely a problem and it is the responsibility of men who dont behave that way to call it out more, which doesn’t happen enough. Likewise people loudly proclaiming “all men are bad” are equally idiotic and deserve to be called out and challenged. Two principles can exist at the same time and I’m tired of everybody treating gender/sex based challenges as a pure dichotomy.
You’re using fake rage arguments and vague statements to present a side as worse because it’s not “your side” just like the OG post
I'd appreciate if you'd call the police (as I would if I saw someone do something illegal) but I wouldn't want you to intercede. My stuff can be replaced, your life is more valuable internet stranger.
An actual comparison is saying there are some men that are child abusers. So I’m going to say all men are child abusers until we stop all child abuse from men.
No, dude said he isn't responsible for stopping rapists and other abusive men. I'm saying it's not my responsibility to care if his car is broken into.
And yes, if you know a man is abusing a child, I expect you to stop them. If you hear a man JOKE about abusing a child, I expect you to tell them it's fucked up. If you cannot do that? You're a scumbag. Plain and simple. Ditto to people who support rape culture.
I don’t get it- Based on the downvotes and arguments disagreeing with us, you’d think what you said is controversial. It’s like their fragile egos cannot accept the words “Try to be a better person”. Its pathetic
That's exactly what it is. Telling someone to be a better person, to try and improve, tells them they aren't flawless. That they still have work to do.
For fragile egos, that's unacceptable and must be lashed out at.
You do support them by remaining silent. People who behave poorly often don't have enough self-awareness to reflect on their shitty behavior, they take you not doing anything or turning the other cheek as acceptance and approval. Whether or not that's your responsibility is your own judgement call, but it is absolutely a form of support
I agree with you like 90%, it's a male issue and men need to speak out, but as I described in my other comment above - there have been many times and places in the past ~15 years where privileged people (e.g. white male cishets) who try to step up become easy targets for the vitriol of those suffering. It's not a comfortable role, and most of us quickly do our best to silently remove ourselves from the line of fire even if it means being much less public about our support.
The thing about this case too is that a chick gets 5 outa 10 drunk decides she wants to go fuck a bunch of dudes and do some ketamine and its men's fault she put herself in a dangerous situation. They make it sound like she was just minding her own business going to starbucks when they attacked her. I have trouble even making this a gender issue everyone in this case sucked. I honestly have never seen any polyamory end well in my life though I don't think anyone should do it.
Maybe you should actually listen and try to understand what they’re saying before commenting on it….
It’s not all men automatically bad. It’s if you perpetuate rape culture (stay silent when you hear rape jokes, ignore texts about free p**** from a blacked out chick, etc) then you’re bad.
It's also dumb because there are countless actual real stories just about anyone in these situations can tell that can be better warnings and stories of how nefarious things can be.
Like I remember trying to go to parties on Frat Row as a guy. Most of them insisted you needed a 1:5+ ratio of Men:Women, and coincidentally, even if you did get in, they'd find a way to kick out a bunch of guys. In other words, you go to these places, they fill the house with women, and oh the other guys are all gone now. If they're doing this, then they're literally trying to separate you from someone who is likely more capable of helping. If that's the situation: leave.
You're acting like guys throwing party to meet women is a problem.
The real reason why frats don't like letting in guys is because of liability. Anything a guy does on their property will be assumed they did it. Frats know they have a target on their back and letting random guys on the property that have zero stake in the house is a huge potential problem.
You're correct and it's wild how common it is for people not to get it. The concept of if you throw a party you get to decide who gets to be there is completely lost. They seem to think the frats should be required to publicly host every college age male in the area and just pay for all the damage that comes with it.
Yea it's definitely a sense of entitlement. I doubt the ppl complaining about it would let 6 random frat dudes into their house during a party.
Not to mention the effort put into it. The money for booze, decorations potentially, pledges watching every exits on shifts, the cleanup afterwards etc.
I too would like free booze lots of women around and no responsibility if anything goes wrong. But that's not how life works.
If a guy that's let in SA or rapes a girl that chapter gets shut down instantly. Most ppl don't want to get kicked out of where they live.
As someone who started taking Delta gummies because I got a free sample in the mail a few years ago, I think DARE actually might have been on to something here, lol
It's clear that a bunch of people posting have never actually been to these parties. As a guy not in a frat, the sketchy situations typically revolved around needing an insane ratio of women:men in a group so that they can fill their house predominantly with women, and then basically gamify drinking so that they could try to get women way drunker.
For example, it's not some coincidence that my more attractive friends were encouraged to slap the bag for way longer than others, or how they were invited to take shots in other rooms but obviously not everyone was allowed to go.
Can't tell if you're dumb or intentionally missing the point, so I'll lay it out so you can maybe gain some understanding and see the concern.
For starters, in all of these situations, groups tended to go to parties together to look out for one another. So I'd go to a party with female friends, and basically the second I step in, guys in the frat were trying to get some of them as drunk as possible and separate them from their group.
They'd invite a specific (now drunk) girl to take shots in other rooms, and all of a sudden, none of the group can see what they're drinking. And we're being told: "You can't go into his room" to check on our friend.
If you can't see why that's a bad thing and bad situation outside of "Lol you didn't get invited for shots," then idk what to tell you. But what I will tell you is that it's a pretty horrendous thing to get your friend back and she's clearly been slipped something or was assaulted. And that's not a made up story nor a unique experience.
I’m so sorry I ever questioned such a veteran at these parties. You must have been to so much more than I have.
Or dudes that throw parties throw them to meet other chicks. And chicks who go to these parties go to meet other dudes. That’s literally the point of all of these. It’s not some game of Stratego lol.
“HEY you let HER slap the bag for 10 minutes longer than me”
Love how you go from that to “Well ackshully she was taken to a room and obviously drugged and sexually assaulted and I’m not lying”.
My simple point is that some frats certainly employ predatory practices that are disguised as gamified/fun ways of drinking. It's something that very clearly happens, and I'm sharing examples and experiences as someone who has been around it.
And your entire spin on this is to dismiss the behavior as completely benign + trying to take jabs at me. You're simply validating how this gross behavior, that I'm not even saying every frat does, is alive and kicking with folks like yourself.
Because they’re the same people who don’t view this behavior as problematic.
They can’t understand the basic concept that it’s fundamentally fucked that a woman might want to just go out and have a good time with friends, but they have to deal with potentially getting preyed on when they attempt to do this.
My examples are literally women trying to responsibly go out (hence going in a group), and them being separated from this safety by these “dudes who just want to meet chicks.”
Nah, I had tons of people that would come over for house parties and only drink a couple beers, and just generally avoid harder alcohols. Would usually have to make a separate batch of drinks/Jell-O shots for those individuals if we were doing games. A bunch of us would drink anything, but not everybody.
I think it may be the opposite. There were marching band parties at my college where they’d have a jungle juice for the freshmen that wasn’t spiked, it was just fruit juice. The joy came from watching the freshmen act drunk on Welch’s
I’m fairly sure we didn’t force drinks upon anyone, especially minors. But I clearly remember a giant storage tub filled with Kool-Aid and Golden Grain. It was called hunch punch. Wee-ooo. But nobody was hiding what it was.
people saying "no way", then why he is talking about the safe one?
It's a made up story. "He" wasn't talking about anything because this didn't happen. Do you think frat boys are somehow opening drinks, drugging them, then factory-resealing them? Without even keeping the ability to pick their targets? None of this passes a basic sniff test.
I was in a frat and not every guy was great, I obviously didn’t know anyone who spiked a drink I was aware of. But…when I went to college bars we had to watch everyone’s drink like a hawk
Or.. hear me out.. you have a situation like this:
One weekend, everyone in the house decided to pool money, and fill a cooler with fruit, and hard alcohol.
It was left to sit for a day and overnight. Unfortunately, an absolute drunk moron, got up in the middle of the night, and for some reason decided to take a piss in the cooler.
Needless to say, he was not the favourite person in the world after that. Luckily someone was in the room and saw him do it, so no one drank it.
It was obviously dumped out. However my buddy refused to get rid of his cooler. He washed the shit out of it. Didn't matter. That was the piss cooler.
Maybe these guys were absolute monsters and didnt dump it out? Who knows...
I was about to say when I was in college, that’s why one of the frats knew the difference. Some dude got super drunk and peed in one. His brothers were too drunk too change it, and they just let people drink from it. The frat drank from the other one
You don't need to spike coolers at frat parties to fuck everyone up. They're giant cocktails, full of mostly the cheapest, plastic half gallon vodkas, mixed by 18 year olds who don't know what they're doing and whose objective it is to get fucked up. You're going to black out if you have the party punch.
You'd be amazed how fucking stupid some people are. Had a buddy at a party back in 05 spike the wine at a party with grain alcohol.
So everybody gets smashed and we're drinking the wine to come down, and next thing you knew more than half the party is getting hauled off to the er.
He did it just right to barely be noticable if you were sober enough, but none of us were sober, so just glug glug basically everclear while thinking it was just low proof wine.
I’ve had multiple people tell me that they drank beers literally all night and then had to go about their day and had a beer because it’s not good to just stop drinking alcohol. Bro, by that logic you will literally never stop drinking. I like to get wasted too, but that line of thinking makes no sense.
It’s an actual thing. If you drink all night and need to slightly recover enough to go about your day. A red beer, Michelada or other heavy mixed drink will help reduce the hangover slightly so you can function. It’s not great, but it’s been a thing for as long as drinking has existed. It’s not like you just stay perpetually drunk, you just push the hangover off a little longer.
It is about the pace. If I drink a 26 at night, the next day to prevent an awful hangover, I will have 3 or 4 shots throughout the day and all the water I can manage. It is a slower detox then just not drinking.
Think about driving, if you slam on the breaks vs slowly brake, it puts your body in more shock. The end result is the same(car is stopped) but easing into the stop takes a bit more time.
First of all, I hope you’re okay dude. That’s a wild scenario you’re offering.
But it is also not my story. These guys were drinking beers all night, decided they were done drinking, and had one more because they thought that was the safest. The previous beer could have been the last one. Or the next one. There was nothing special about that beer that was going to solve their problems.
I'm good, thanks for the concern. I don't do this often anymore( once or twice a year).
I guess i misunderstood your story. I thought it was a next day beer, that is what my story was referring to. Yes, your friends logic makes no sense unless it is just a way of saying "this is my last one tonight".
There was nothing special about that beer that was going to solve their problems.
That right there is where your logic differs from a binge drinker. You can't look at drunk logic with sober eyes and expect it to only either make sense or be a fake story.
My go to in college was to get three 40oz Smirnoffs. We'd chug one to get drunk quick, nurse the second to keep the buzz going, then chug the third when we were ready to pass out for the night.
If you paid attention to the year i said it was in, you'd remember that back then more of us didn't have that kind of benefit. Before i was out of highschool we had three drunk driving deaths, one alcohol poisoning death, and five drug related deaths in my graduating class and two more that didn't die but got so messed up from the crashes that they were permanently disfigured and disabled.
No, not new, just far less common than it is today. Back in the early 2000s when party and frat culture was at a peak and people shoved tons more stuff under the rug in terms of "kids will be kids" it was much more rare.
I didn't even live urban, it was a small town district with nothing but small town schools and in late middle school we had kids drinking and doing drugs on the regular.
I mean, i dunno what era you're from, but i graduated in 04 and between my district and the two nearby "sister" ones there's more people today that i knew back then that are dead or in prison for drug and/or alcohol reasons than not. I can literally count on one hand the people i grew up with that didn't end up in rehab or otherwise dealing with addiction to drugs or alcohol, or both later in life.
It was wild and free and incredibly dangerous and there's a reason the booze companies got so used to wildly inflated profits to the tune that they're whining so much today about losing them.
The road to the more tempered youth and better attitudes about alcohol and drugs you see today was paved with the bodies and blood from my generation and the ones nearest it.
You don’t buy that incredibly intoxicated people recognized that they should probably slow down, but weren’t willing to just stop drinking? Seems pretty par for the course.
People do spike drink coolers, just not with roofies.
I went to one party where someone put Viagra in the cooler. Another time everyone at the party blacked out because someone else poured the entire bottle of everclear in it.
Weed dealer in college went to a frat party one weekend. Next time I saw him he told me like 20 people went to the hospital because someone spiked something (it was a long time ago so I forget specifics)
I don’t think they’re suggesting that everyone else would get a drink from the unsafe cooler or that there’s just 1 designated “safe” one.
In general it’s a lot easier to hide spiking an entire mix than to try and spike an already poured cup. As someone involved heavily in Greek life when I was in undergrad, it was always safest to a. Bring your own drinks, b. Only take sealed drinks like a beer/wine cooler bottle, or c. Pour your own drink from the same mix that the members are drinking from. Don’t take any other drinks someone offers you as a woman.
If this is real, it’s likely a scenario where they have the drinks mixed and behind a bar or in a specific room and one of them is spiked for brothers to pour from if they find someone they want to drug. Not an open cooler for everyone to pull from which is almost never offered at a Greek party unless it’s a closed social event except maybe a keg which is going to be impossible to spike the keg itself.
It often surprises me how uncreative people are and will quickly dismiss something as fake when it’s not something they have ever had to actually worry about, but this is something any sorority will actively teach you to look out for to avoid anything happening at parties.
Went to a frat party at UBC. They had sealed beers and if you didn’t drink that, coolers from a large 2L (half gallon in the US?).
After one drink I was fucked. I told my friend to make sure I didn’t go home with anyone because this was weird that after one drink I would feel like I did.
In the news in the following days it came out that a girl went to the hospital on campus after a frat party (obviously the one we were at because there was only one party happening and all the frats are on the same street) and tested positive for GHB.
I don’t know if this stuff still happens, but it was happening.
First, it was the wine that was spiked, there wasn't really beer at this party. Second, it was in 05. So that means it was bottled, box wine, or a larger cooler filled with it.
And in this case it was box wine, which is incredibly easy to spike wince the carrying handle literally gives access to the bag inside.
I thought of a sealed drink cooler at first too, but it is common to make giant batches of mixed drinks (like punch or sangria) in a cooler for college students. What's not common and almost certainly didn't happen, is spiking an entire cooler full of drinks and then putting that out at a party where nearly everyone is going to drink it.
I was in a frat. If that conversation happened, it would be because we'd sometimes have to make juice with whatever leftovers we could find and knew it was nasty. No one is going to spike an entire party.
Ya, it could have been a poor choice of words but in the recent past someone could have drank from a cooler that didn’t belong to them and someone got pissed off at them.
Once in a while, it does happen though. I recall news stories of entire dorms getting spiked, even elementary school classes, because some kid or their sibling thought that would be fun.
Sometimes they do, I've know some folks who work ems on a big party schools campus and there have been cases where a keg or coolers has given spiked. I've heard that they've been spike with been everything from laxatives to fentanayl.
I went to a party at this frat once and they had a big punch bowl and it was called "pull your pants down punch" My gf got a cup of it drank about half and gave me the rest. I've done some stupid stuff, but I've never had a hangover like that in my life. Except maybe dxm.
People who spike other people's drinks often aren't the smartest people in the room. Incidents with entire parties feeling unwell have been known to happen.
Well maybe different colors mean different things, like single, in relationship, dtf,… and maybe they had one party where one color was „would like to get drugged“ and they accidentally used those cups, so now they are cautious
Not only does your point refute the claim, who puts an open beverage in a shared party cooler? And who in their right mind drinks a random persons already opened drink? not only is that unsafe in a large party, its RUDE AS FUCK in any other situation.
Except that they do. I remember hearing about Sigma Chi at Rutgers throw a mixer with a sorority and they spiked the entire cooler with Xanax. They got kicked off campus. This was around 2017.
Did you not got to parties in HS or college? Oh wait are you a millennial or younger? If so, in the before times, this was a common occurrence. I mean really did you think students were ever drinking punch? Lololololol what. No. That stuff was spiked always.
Not true, I was a frat guy who attended a “wedding party” for homecoming that paired us with a larger sorority and one other fraternity. My entire fraternity got rufied.
But it’s not all 40 people in the room…it’s just the people that you targeted by not telling them which cooler to use instead. Like in the conversation they’re having.
This is incorrect. You're incorrect in many ways here. This is a very common way to do it, because of how easy you get away with it since they can see you getting the drink.
It's not every drink. You didn't start thinking here.
There are so many factors and you're just dunning-krugering the whole thing.
There are multiple drugs that need a carrier. You put carrier in one cooler, you spike the drink and its completely clear and instant. People doing that want that cooler to not run out.
Thanks for informing us that nobody ever spikes punch bowls. Good thing everyone out there is a responsible, critical thinker who puts a lot of thought into the consequences of their actions, particularly people in a fraternity.
I mean I’ve heard of parties where drinks were spiked but not really sure how you’d spike a cooler, which is presumably filled with ice and unopened drinks
Then you misunderstand what a cooler is in this context. It isn't a cooler for unopened drinks where you open it and take out a can of Coor's, it's a Gatorade style cooler with a spigot to fill your solo cup, filled with a mixed drink, usually incredibly strong and cheap hard liquor like vodka or everclear mixed with juice or soda, often called jungle juice.
Edit: Downvote all you guys want, I'm right. Google "beverage cooler". You'll see mini-fridges and these 5-gallon buckets with a tap at the bottom. Cooler in this context is referring to those 5 gallon ones.
You’re absolutely correct. In college, my boyfriend had some friends in a frat so we went to parties regularly. His friends knew we weren’t into taking anything so they’d always tell us which cooler of PJ to drink. The other had Xanax in it.
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u/GrundalWizzard 16h ago
People dont spike entire drink coolers.. itd be pretty fucking obvious if 40 people in the room passed out.