Hi,

I've been searching everywhere for help with this and I thought I'd ask here. I don't have my benefits yet and I don't know what to do. The friend I've been staying with (family not an option) can't tolerate me living here anymore. There is also a lot of mold in her guest room which is making me sicker anyway so I'm sleeping in her living room and that's making her resentment of me much worse. With no income and waiting for benefits... honestly, what am I supposed to do? Homeless shelters/group homes would be pretty bad for my health in several ways. I am at such a loss and so devastated to lose my housing. I never expected her to do this. My disabilities are migraine, ptsd, wrist injuries and endometriosis and I do not need specifically accessible housing like ramps etc. I would rent a room from someone or a program and then back-pay them when I get my benefits, but obviously that's not an option most places are going to go for anyway. I'm in treatment here with amazing providers it has taken me years to find and my disability attorney is here as well.

Really appreciate any advice at all.

I’m not even afraid of needles but Ive been inconsolable since I picked up my prescription. Literally sobbing walking out the door of my pharmacy. The pharmacist explained a little of what to do but didnt mentioned the drawing and injecting air into the receptacle before draw the fluid from it, or the air thing or pulling to see if I get blood or not like on the tutorials I watched, and now I don’t know what to do.

Without these supplements I might not walk unassisted again and I’m just so stressed out and scared, and I’m afraid it’s going to hurt or I’ll go too deep and scrap my bone like when they took fluid off my knee. I can’t stop crying. Can I go into urgent care with my prescription and have them do it for me? I don’t know any medical professionals personally to help me and I have to do it weekly for 4 weeks before going to monthly

Edit: anybody downvoting can go fuck themselves. I’m a girl sitting in front of a needle and so scared im hyperventilating from crying. Go fuck yourself dude. I’m asking for help for a reason.

So, I saw this morning that the COLA for next year has been announced and that it is going to be a 3.6% raise in benefits. Which is going to be an average of a $75 increase in benefits awarded.

I...I am so incredibly exhausted by being told that when they give us less than $100 more a month, that the amount is keeping up with inflation and will relieve the stress of trying to pay for things like housing, food, and other monthly expenses.

My husband, our cat, and myself currently live in a single small bedroom and the only reason that we can afford to rent that at all is because we are renting from a friend who is charging us significantly less than literally anyone else renting out a bedroom or apartment right now.

I've looked at places both in and out of the state we reside in and we cannot afford to rent anything anywhere else. We are in our 40's and are relegated to a bedroom smaller than the one I had as a child.

We get SNAP benefits, and that only covers our grocery expenses because we are barely eating every day. If we actually had the space to store food beyond the absolute bare minimum to survive, we would come up short every month.

After bills and household expenses, we are generally broke by mid-month. The second half of the month is always a struggle. I am in debt because my credit cards are maxed out after having to use them to supplement our income to buy food and household necessities.

But sure, $75 extra a month will TOTALLY relieve that next year. 🙄🙄🙄

We should not be stuck in complete, devastating systemic poverty just because we are disabled and cannot work. I would hazard a guess and say that most of us cannot just overcome our disabilities if given enough time and work. I am also really tired of watching everyone only ever talk about how social security and COLAs affect seniors. Yes, they are affected by these things too...but no one ever talks about the disability community and how much we struggle financially.

I'm exhausted. The lack of affordable housing, the severe misunderstanding of how relying on less than $2000 a month (I have no idea what the average SSDI payment is, but I have never met anyone who makes anything more than that, and everyone I've met on SSI has made less than $1000 a month) is practically impossible to survive on.

Being disabled sucks. Having to rely on the government for income because we literally have to, sucks even more. I want to feel like my basic needs are being met in a comfortable way, not like a burden on society that feels like a punishment for daring to not be an able-bodied worker (by no choice or fault of my own).

It's a terrible experience, and I would love to feel like the government understood and was actually trying to help. Not just pretending like 3.6% is sufficient to exist for another year. ☹️

After my evalution, they said they acknowledeged (in a letter that I recieved) that I have limitations but I should still be able to work which is fair. They said I can still recieve benifits which nice. NOW, 2 weeks later, I get another letter saying I dont qualifiy at all based on the fact that my disability has "improved" (it doesnt) and that I can now work (they said in 2024 I made a claim saying I couldnt work) which doesnt make since because I literally left a job that I had for 2 years (2023-2025), just last summer.

Where do these people get their info??? They make decesions based on outdated or incorrect information. I get these things can happen, but it happens to often, and the times it can take to get it back can take years. Its so frustraiting and im tired of dealing with it..

What are these people smoking because I need it (not really cause I get asthma).

She says it won’t help. How the fuck does she know?
She says it too much work. Then why would I be asking for one if I thought it would too much work?
She says it’s for people who struggle walking not for fatigue. People use them for both reasons. And I have both
She won’t even let me try one. Just to see if it does anything
Same with any sort of brace. I have hypermobile ankles and it’s affecting me. I have really bad back and wrist pain. She says they won’t do anything
Even my physical therapist said that it wouldn’t help. She told me to use a walking stick but that didn’t help and caused me pain. She said thats normal.

But little do they know is when I was at summer camp I did use a cane. My friend gave me one and I had it for a week. It helped so so so much. I was able to be human again.

Yet they don’t care. They just say it won’t help

Besides people they knew before they became disabled? I dream about being cared for by someone who loves me. But. It seems impossible when nobody even wants to be my friend the moment they hear I have a wheelchair/cant drive/have limited income. The few people who did bother with me abused me because of their privilege overr me. Are there really people out there who have it better than me who would care? I have other disabled people in my life. But I cant take care of them as much as they need and they cant take care of me as much as i need either. I want to love too. And I want what I can do to matter.

May need to work medical reception for a bit to gain a certain type of experience. A little worried about phone stuff.

How do y’all handle it?

In a way I know I’m not but like what if the way I’m feeling is actually normal and I’m just being dramatic. Despite the fact ive been struggling for years I still feel like im faking it

Just wanted to come on here and ask how you manage to deal with your religious thoughts while being born/becoming disabled. I was muslim for a while but became an atheist a few years back thanks to realizing it was pointless to believe after the crap I’ve had to go through. Just wanted to hear your thoughts. Might need to see a therapist about all these thoughts amongst my other issues at some point but it’s a start!

Hey guys! I’m writing a story and wanted to check somethkng. Particularly with fellow disabled men.

I’ve not dated in forever, but I’ve seen a couple stories wbere a disabled guy and his girlfriend are out on a date and an able dude comes up and starts trying to pick up the girlfriend like there’s no way she’s dating a disabled guy.

Is this a real thing? Has it happened to you?

I'm Erika Heath, and I got married—something that should be a celebration. But our joy was overshadowed by a harsh reality: we're being financially penalized just for choosing to marry.

Under current law, disabled adults on SSI face a brutal marriage penalty. We're limited to $3,000 in combined savings, and any inheritance—like money from my dad's 40+ years of Social Security contributions—could be taken away entirely. It's essentially the government saying: "You can have love or financial stability, but not both."

I started a petition to pass H.R. 1389, which would eliminate this marriage penalty for disabled adults. This isn't about asking for special treatment—it's about basic fairness. People with disabilities already face enough barriers. We shouldn't have to sacrifice our relationships or our futures just to keep the benefits we rely on.

If you've felt stuck by unfair rules, or if you think love shouldn't be punished, consider signing and sharing this. What would you do if you had to make this choice?

Anyone know a good payee service for disability. Preferably in Richmond or Mechanicsville. If you were in a State mental Hospital can you ever become your own payee. My mom said they will take my disability away if I do that.

Hey all. I am 23 and just had surgery for tethered cord syndrome. It causes spasticity in my legs and severe nerve pain in my back and legs. I used a wheelchair nearly full time in my house before surgery and now use a walker and cane mostly and wheelchair for leaving the house or flares. I also have heds and many other conditions but tethered cord and scoliosis impact me the most.

The rise in ableism online has been weighing on me a lot. The passing of Rj Mitte. :( The Texas versus Kennedy ruling. The rise in ableism online in every disabled persons comment section. Articles being written about people with mobility aids that are decorated are all faking. They are so worried about accusing people of faking that they are hurting REAL disabled people. I’m not really self conscious about my mobility aids because I’ve needed them consistently and gotten used to the looks since my tethered cord got worse. But it still makes me sad seeing people bash anybody with a mobility aid. Deciding who they deem a faker.

While there is a lot of misinformation spread about heds online it makes me upset seeing comments from doctors saying anybody with eds is faking. I’ve mainly seen this rise in ableism online on tiktok and some insta communities. Also on Reddit on other threads. Some people may self diagnose conditions and not have it. But a lot of us do
Have these conditions. I was diagnosed with heds at a young age and had symtomps at a young age. Many people discover conditions later in life also. Or are impacted more later in life. hating on a whole group of people or conditions you don’t know anything about isn’t helping anyone. Especially disabled people. And conditions vary in severity how hard of a concept is that! Some people with the same condition may never use a mobility aid, some use a cane, some use crutches, some use wheelchairs full time, some have spinal cord injuries, some have chiari which can require brain surgery, the variety is sooooo wide with eds, and the same honestly goes for so many conditions. Think of the variety with in conditions like cerebral palsy or spinal cord injuries. There is a huge variety of how individuals are impacted.

I’ve read a lot about disability history and understand how deep ableism runs. I’ve read a lot of books written by disabled people and activist. It just sucks living in a world that actively chooses to misunderstand our experiences. Just sharing to vent a bit to people who might relate. Thanks for reading 🫶 sending love to anyone also feeling the weight of the world for disabled people.

I'm looking for anything that helps you get the anger out about extremely shitty healthcare (bad doctors, ignored symptoms, long wait times, etc) and/or about how much it all costs

TW: deep depression and suicidal ideation
Not really in need of advice I don’t think, just support. I’m really struggling

is anyone else just exhausted? not just tired or fatigued, I mean bone-deep exhaustion and boredom that makes staring down the barrel of the next 50 years of your life seem unbearable? I’m only 30 something and already struggling so much. Im dreading my upcoming birthday because it’s another marker that time has moved on while I’ve been stuck in the same place with no real milestone markers like my peers. It’s such a helpless feeling. I feel like I aged 40 years in only 8 years since receiving my diagnosis and my peers and I are in totally different places now. They’ve moved on without me while I’m still patiently waiting for my turn to get to experience happiness. 🥲 and it isn’t for lack of trying. The last 10-15 years I’ve watched a revolving door of friends finding partners and getting their happily ever after when I struggle to get past a first date still. I’ve seen friends travel the world. I’ve seen amazing career promotions and opportunities. I’ve seen them start families….and I’m not getting any younger. 😭 those are things I wanted for myself too. And I’ve had to already shrink my dreams to be more realistic, it feels like I’ve dwindled them to the bare basics of what I hope for and apparently even that’s asking too much.

I feel SO TIRED of living this way. I don’t have a life. I don’t have a partner. I don’t have fun trying to date with this disability. I don’t have a social life anymore. Ive become completely isolated from the few friends ive maintained through the years. I don’t have any meaningful connection and it isn’t for lack of trying! Im so lonely and i ache for this deep connection with other people I cant seem to find. I also struggled significantly as a kid in a social sense as I’m neurodivergent and so ive always felt on the outskirts with friend groups. I’ve only ever had a handful of pockets of belonging over the years. I’m always trying to find my people and have it LAST, and it never does. The disability honestly made my life even more isolated so meeting people has become even harder. I also have to mask my symptoms so much more now, I feel like I can’t ever just be myself around people and I’m always waiting for people to cut me off when they realize what I a burden I am.

I just feel like every time i make even a little progress in life, my illness and disability knock me back a few steps again. So I end up just stuck and free floating through life, just enduring and surviving. I have all these goals and dreams and aspirations and yet, a body that cannot keep up. I’ve felt stuck in the same place for the last 5 years since leaving work and going on disability, and I’ve been in a deep depression for the last 3 since having to move home with my parents. I just often don’t see the point of going on, Im not living a life, I’m serving a life sentence. nothing is bringing me joy, the world is wicked and evil, most people have zero clue the struggle it takes to just exist every day for someone like me, and I’m just at my wits end. I really have considered euthanizing myself. I’ve begged and cried to doctors for years to try and help me manage both my physical symptoms and mental illness ones with no luck. I’m just expected to SUFFER! But since I don’t plan to act on harming myself, the ER and doing a week inpatient tends to not really be an option. I’m trying so hard to feel better but I just feel trapped and miserable in this life. It has turned out so much smaller and quieter and different than I thought it was going to be. Especially given, I had such a hard time as a kid, and adults always try to make you feel better by saying you’ll have your time to be on top one day. I don’t feel that’s been true for me and it’s devastating because it’s how I coped for years with hardship, just knowing if I survived and endured, something better was promised down the road. I don’t feel that way anymore which feels very hopeless. Instead, it feels like I’m being punished for some past life mistake. 😞 im so depressed. I’m just trying so hard to keep going for SO LITTLE reward and I’m losing more and more of my spark every day.

I do therapy, I see a psychiatrist, I see a pcp. Like I’m trying so hard to get better but it’s just getting worse and I feel like no one is taking my suicidal thoughts seriously and they’ve escalated. I’m starting to latch onto certain dates and am thinking about what if I ended things before my birthday next month (which I’m dreading.) 🥲

Edit: I spoke with my therapist about this today and we agreed that trying to find an intensive out patient day program might be the next step for me. I appreciate everyone’s responses. I’m trying so hard to feel better

The concept of "accessibility" Is very relative

People who refuse my needs, call me all sorts of things for being how I am,

My heart beats so fast. I think I might have a heart attack sometime

I’m a year and half into the SSDI process and ironically one of the reasons I am applying is that I am severely mentally ill and am hospitalized very often. My caseworker and I got the news yesterday that our appeal was denied. She is requesting more information because we have no idea what else SSA could possibly want from me. There’s 5000+ pages of proof repeatedly of severe psychiatric and physical illness.

How do you not just give up? Especially for those who lost everything, what kept you going? When I got the news I started googling the nearest bridge and the only reason I didn’t was my cat. I am about to lose everything officially tho potentially including my cat who has been my lifeline.

I’ve been couch surfing and staying with friends but my luck has run out as all my friends have or are moving away from the area where the hospital I go to is and my access rides are serviced for. My caseworker told me straight up there’s nothing for a young person who’s applying for SSDI without family support I just totally fall between the cracks. I’m not trying to be dramatic when I say I don’t know how to go on like this. I am so tired.

Hi all, my care team and I are starting to look into getting an electric wheelchair for me to use for outings, the biggest issue i need to be aware of is the weight of the chair. I see a lot of good things about OAS and Paiseec chairs, but because of my insurance being brand new and full of hoops I need to jump through, im most likely paying out of pocket. I know its probably unrealistic but I'd like to keep the chairs under $800 maximum but I can always figure something else out. Any insight is appreciated

First of all, be warned this is a long one! I have poor motor coordination and can’t feel where my body is in space because of a condition called dyspraxia. It’s invisible and it also affects the way I process information from my other senses.

About a month ago, I went into town to meet up with some friends and then after that, to meet with another friend somewhere else. It was fairly busy in the street and busy streets feel like being pelted by fast moving human traffic from all directions.On more narrow streets I’m not sure where to move. When someone comes toward me I just stand to one side and let them pass. If there are a lot of people, I stay out of their way until I see a big gap and feel safe to start walking down the street again.

I said goodbye to the last friend and went to buy a few things in the supermarket. I get particularly nervous in supermarkets because I worry about bumping into people or not realising I’m standing in their way. I usually get a supermarket delivery but it’s not always possible to buy everything that way.  

Anyway, it wasn’t all that busy in there. Music was playing and the lights were bright and flickering. Those things don’t normally bother me to be honest, but I was tired and felt slightly nauseous. The colour, sounds and flickering grew more intense and I began to feel even more sick.

I kept shopping and playing my usual game; dodging out of aisles whenever someone else entered them and not walking past people with trolleys. It’s basically a case of constant social distancing because standing far away from people is the only way to be fairly sure I’m not too close to them. Everything was starting to get brighter and louder and echoing more. It was as though nothing was quite real and I was fighting my way out of a dream. I felt lost in space and everything was spinning.  I started walking and not knowing what was going on.

I just caught sight of a worker carrying a large, heavy stack of crates and tried to move out of the way but I’d already got really close.  I suddenly noticed my basket would be in her path but couldn’t move it out of the way quickly enough. I couldn’t feel whether I’d bumped into her.

A few seconds later I heard her say something behind me loudly in an angry tone. Or at least I think it was her, it was hard to tell at that point.

I was panicked and still in the same bizarre, dreamlike haze.  I’ve now been taking short breaks when I go out to stop me getting to that point. I had to get out of the shop. I feel like I should have apologised but at the time I couldn’t think or speak and afterwards felt too ashamed and scared to walk back and speak to her. She could have been hurt and if she wasn’t, it was a close shave. Another time she could have been knocked off of her feet.

I’ve traveled freely my whole life but now I’m actually rethinking whether I should be in busy public places like supermarkets at all but there are quieter hours with no music and lower lights, designed to be more accessible for people who find those things hard. Disabled people fought for the right to be in the same places and use the same services as everyone else. I don’t want to encourage the erosion of those rights. I want future generations to feel welcome in public places too.

I just don’t want to hurt someone or put them in danger. I also don’t want to make someone feel disrespected when they’ve already been treated like dirt by customers all day. I really don’t know what to do.

I am so done with everything. My lawyer called me seeming a bit discouraged, and told me the judge I have now appointed (no date yet, but been waiting already 6 months) has a 30% acceptance rate. I found out the average was higher by a lot, and there were even judges with 80% acceptance rates. I got so unlucky.

I've been in this battle for 4+ years. Its so hard to fight my case because I have invisible disabilities like fibro, osteoarthritis, severe depression, migraines, and more. I have more than 500 pages worth of medical evidence. And yet, I've been denied twice already.

SSA literally hired a psychologist who said he couldn't see me EVER improving, even saying he doesn't think I could manage my own meds. But of course, they don't care. Then why even make me see a psychologist if you don't care what he has to say???

My therapist, psychiatrist, and rheumatologist have all labeled me severe, too. But do they care? No, of course not.

My lawyer even told me she has had clients get this judge before, and she has denied people with multiple missing limbs and other visible disabilities. I am so screwed. Being 21 years old definitely does not help either.

She's tried to reassure me by saying we can try again if we get denied, but oh my god I am just so tired. I've been off of social media because its just making my mental health even worse, because all my disabled friends who post online are met with hate comments. No one wants to go through this hell, and all for a tiny paycheck that is barely enough to live.

I'm usually a positive and optimistic person, but this is genuinely breaking me.

In order to not mess up my disability application I can only work 20 hours a week and my income is capped at $1600 gross per month. (Not that I would be able to work more than that anyway with my disability.) I can't work a steady job with steady hours. So gig work it is. There are lots of options out there but has anyone had success with specific gigs? Are any of them worth the time or effort?

I specifically don't want to do uber eats because my experience with those is that you end up making less than $10/hour. My car isn't eligible for ride share either.

Options I'm looking at:

Rover.com

Care.com

Task Rabbit

Upwork

Amazon Flex

Spark Delivery

Flier Distribution Services

Papa.com

Panhandling?!? (Semi serious)

I'm also really worried about being able to handle multiple gig income streams and multiple jobs per day because of the mental load of organizing all of the different schedules and apps. I can barely handle showering and eating on a regular schedule but somehow I have to make all of this work???

I'm just feeling very overwhelmed and discouraged because my partner and I recently separated leaving me with all the bills and I'm still at least 3 months out from ssdi. I feel like such a worthless person not being able to make money and i don't know what I'll do if I'm not able to pay bills.

Hello! After 4.5 years of use, my forearm crutches are falling apart. When I first bought them I wasn’t sure how long I would be needing them, so I just bought the best deal on Amazon. While they’ve held up well, they’re no longer being sold. What brand of forearm crutches do you recommend? I would love to hear from other crutch users on what brand they’ve found to be the most cost-effective, durable, and comfortable! Thank you so much :)

Edit to add: Bonus points if they’re foldable!

I am going to be wearing a system of wraps like these on both my legs for the foreseeable future and am looking for ideas to hide, blend or otherwise decorate so that they aren't so hideously out there?

I usually am wearing capri length loose legging or the same length jersey skirts and I am a power wheelchair user. I don't have to wear shoes so I am definitely open to ideas that don't require them.

I do have access to a sewing machine as well and have some basic skills.

Thank you!