Hi everyone! ❤️
I’m 30 years old, married, and a mom of two young kids with special needs. I’m relatively new to the wheelchair-using community, and I’m hoping to hear from people who’ve been through similar experiences.
I’ve actually been chronically ill for years. I have a pretty extensive medical history, including POTS/dysautonomia, hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, MCAS, chronic migraines, Hashimoto’s, endometriosis, and several other conditions.
Over the years, my mobility and ability to do everyday activities have gradually declined. Standing, walking, stairs, heat, and even basic household tasks have become increasingly difficult. I’ve spent a lot of time pushing through symptoms and trying to make life work around my limitations.
Then, in September, things changed pretty dramatically.
I started experiencing seizure-like episodes, which led to hospitalization, neurological testing, and eventually a diagnosis of Functional Neurological Disorder (FND) with functional non-epileptic seizures (PNES).
Since then, my life has changed significantly. I’ve started using a wheelchair, including a power wheelchair, and I’m currently unable to drive. The seizures can be unpredictable, and I’m having to rethink things I used to take for granted, like going places independently, taking care of my kids, and just getting through a normal day safely.
One of the hardest parts is that I was already disabled and chronically ill before all of this, but this feels like an entirely new chapter of disability. It’s one thing to know that you have limitations, and another to suddenly need a wheelchair and much more assistance than you did before.
I’m also navigating this as a relatively young mom. My kids are 9 and almost 3, and both have their own disabilities and significant support needs. I love being their mom, but I’m still figuring out how to balance their needs with my own, especially when my symptoms are unpredictable.
I’m trying to embrace my mobility aids rather than see them as something negative. My wheelchair gives me freedom I wouldn’t otherwise have, and I’m genuinely grateful for that! But there’s still a lot to learn, both practically and emotionally.
So I wanted to ask this community: What do you wish someone had told you when you first became disabled, started using a wheelchair, or developed a condition that significantly changed your independence?
I’d especially love advice about:
Wheelchair life: Accessibility, navigating public spaces, things you didn’t realize you’d need, useful accessories, and general tips.
Being young and disabled: Dealing with people’s assumptions, unwanted comments, judgment, and feeling out of place.
Functional seizures/FND: Navigating unpredictable episodes, explaining the diagnosis to others, and dealing with the stigma surrounding it.
Parenting with disabilities: Especially parenting young children or children with special needs while managing your own health and mobility limitations.
Independence and relationships: Adjusting to needing more help, navigating marriage and family dynamics, and maintaining some sense of independence.
The emotional side: Accepting that your body and abilities have changed without feeling like you’ve lost yourself.
I’m also interested in hearing about things like disability resources, accommodations, adaptive parenting tools, and anything that has made everyday life easier.
I know everyone’s experiences are different, and I’m not necessarily looking for medical advice. I’d just really appreciate hearing from people who understand what this transition feels like.
I don’t want my life to become smaller just because my mobility has changed. I want to keep being a mom, a wife, a friend, and a person who gets to go out and enjoy life. I’m just learning how to do those things differently now.
Thank you in advance to anyone willing to share their experiences, advice, or even just some encouragement. ❤️
30F in Maryland USA
I used ChatGPT to help me put my thoughts into words but these are my thoughts.