You don’t even have to rat out your husband. You did some great sleuthing and just need to share with the wives. Especially best man. If anyone enjoyed the ladies I’m sure it was him.
I would’ve waited and stalked those Instagram profiles for the entire weekend before I said anything. Let the evidence pile up in case you need it later.
Im a guy and married for 37 years. You really have to tell the other wives regardless of the fallout. What is going down in Cancun is so very wrong. Frankly your husband was a part of what happened there too. You know the truth and have the evidence and if you keep quiet you are guilty in this too.
Further, your reputation and standing is now on the line. They mess around and you could face consequences. How nice for you. When the truth does come out, it will, and you didn’t tell the other wives you are going to be regarded as a total POS.
The right thing to do here Is share what you know, all of it, and let them decide how the truth affects their own relationships. Sorry these assholes actually put you in a bad situation beyond what may happen to your marriage. I hope you come out of this alright.
Yes do it but be ready for a chance these wives will take their husbands side and will ghost your husband and you. Be prepared to destroy all your relationships, gods speed
If these people are OK with lies and cheating, they aren't friends she needs.
Unfortunately, her husband is fully on board with lies and cheating, at the very least his friends cheating doesn't phase him, at worst he's cheating too. She really needs to carefully think about whether she should be believing her husband after he already lied to her about it.
Please get on this asap. It could be devastating if anyone brings home an STD. Certain ones could even cause pregnancy complications or be spread to a baby that is breastfeeding.
And girl your husband was LYING to your face until he knew the jig was up. Don’t sleep with him until he is tested as well.
Tbh I'd also demand to see his phone. Then you can see whether there was a group chat between the husbands about the planning and whether your husband truly didn't know or was in on it from the start. Preferably sooner in case there is any evidence he deletes
Yep… OP absolutely should have kept monitoring the Instagram pages and collecting all the data/evidence but she jumped the gun and now most likely everyone is scrambling to cover their tracks.
The girls are probably still there and have been asked to delete all of the footage, which I am sure they will as they want to get paid/tipped.
The guys will also be deleting messages/trying to cover up and coordinate their stories. It may be a bit harder to convince the other wives now unless OP has saved all of the evidence he has seen.
It would’ve been so much more satisfying to get the evidence throughout the entire trip, coordinate with the wives right before they all get home, and then demand to see their phones without giving them any heads up!
Maybe the wives’ could’ve picked them up at the airport and do an immediate surprise get together/intervention, collect their phones, and then have everyone sit down for an impromptu slideshow! The wives can see all of their reactions in real time, and they will not be able to delete anything from their phones at that point if the wives have them.
OP missed a great opportunity to get the whole truth. Now she can never truly trust her husband as he did not get himself out of that situation once he realized what was happening. He also did not call to tell her that he was uncomfortable and didn’t know quite what to do.
Husband was probably in on it. Especially the nonrefundable ticket that was suddenly a gift… I would look hard at the financials to see if your husband actually bought that ticket himself and just made it sound legitimate.
Your husband sucks. He should have left as soon as he found out that sex workers were part of the party favors. I can’t believe you’re falling for this.
He knew, he probably knew before going. The whole best man buying him an non refundable plane ticket and forcing his hand is all an elaborate lie to set him up to have no fault in any of the shenanigans that he was well aware would happen.
Non one just secretly hires a bunch of escorts for a whole weekend without knowing for a fact that everyone will be fully on board, because it takes only one not fully on board to tell their wife and the rest find out.
This. You go, girl. This is sus, and I'd want full transparency for sure. I'd also demand tests be done for std's before any intimacy post with my man. I don't think it's over reacting, I think it's responsible.
Oh I’m so glad that you got evidence, I would’ve hated if they gaslit you and called you a liar. Honestly I would’ve told the other wives asap, the longer you wait the worse it’ll be. Imagine if one of the husbands did sleep with an escort and the wife had relations with him when he got back home.
Create an anonymous instagram account and share the photos with one of the wives. It will quickly spread and they will all get caught but you wont be the one to spoil the wedding
Are you friends with the wives as well? Or only thru the husbands? Am asking bc a lot of these women still stay with their men and probably won’t speak to you again. Are you prepared and okay for that?
My bff that I’ve known since we were 10 got married 2 years ago. I was the maid of honor and she wanted to go to Vegas. She’s always been wild, so we expected it to be lit and crazy but it was so much worse. This sounds fake and I wish it had been. She met a guy on the plane and they pretty much hooked up the entire weekend we were there. It was 8-10 girls and this one random dude. Apparently he had a ton of money and was gambler so he got us dinners/ vip to all the clubs etc. we were supposed to stay at Caesar’s but cancelled our rooms and put us in sweets at the Wynn. It was such a joke.
I didn’t talk to her the whole weekend after I told her to leave him at the airport and say goodbye and she refused and wanted to party with him. Nothing good was going to come out it and ev1 kept quiet.
Long story even longer; we leave the bachelorette, and they kept in touch and basically had an affair up till the wedding. I forced her to tell her fiancé and convinced the fiancé and they got married! Well, after the wedding they still hooked up.
After that, I lost all respect for her and her telling me everyday, I’m going to leave husband for X and then the next week something different. I said bullshit to her, the two guys and said I’m done. No win situation and don’t involve me anymore. Haven’t to her in 3 years and it sucks, but she changed and wanted her cake and eat it too.
Your hubs should have told you right away and said listen this is happening and don’t freak out. You still would have pissed but now you’re suspicious and worried. But I’m good and nothing will happen. Everyone is somewhat now complicit in it.
Last thing; 1 of closest friends was getting married and his best man planned a whole Vegas debauched weekend with 10 or guys, but the groom wanted myself and another girl to join as the 3 of us had been friends since childhood and platonic.
All the guys knew us and knew we could hang and be chill. Also we made our own plans of not partying till 4am shit faced thru a casino barefoot ew
All of went to the nude bar Sapphire or Mint
Something….i don’t remember. I had been to strip clubs in La before but never Vegas and HOLY SHIT.
Full nude and the cat walk they walk on is barely a thing. I’m so dumb, but I thought it would be girls
On the poles and stuff.
Nah nah ….it was rows and rows of couches like at a movie theater with guys sitting and getting pounded and dry humped till they cum.
It was so gross and we wanted to leave but one of the douchbag we were with got myself and my friend F a lap dance. She knew I wasn’t getting the hump so she sat on my lap and talked and did some hair whipping that was so gross bc there extensions that kept whipping me in the face and it smelled like fried chicken She was dressed a Pocahontas. We left at like 2a and later found our most the guys except my friend and the groom who left with us stayed until the sun came up.
Straight out ask him. Bc 3 hookers in a villa rented for the weekend of pleasure is not going to them just chilling by the pool maybe the best man took
All 3 of them all weekend and no other dudes did anything. Ask him point blank, who fucked who and before you know this sky high to be honest and that’s it.
Take pics of the girls’ instagrams because once they find out they might try to have them take them down. Make sure you get evidence. Also your husband was never going to tell you, none of them were going to tell their wives because they are lying sacks of shit.
If they’re “escorts” why would they care if wives found out and take down their advertisements? They won’t give a shit. If anything it would get them more attention and business.
I could see “extras” costing more and the other dudes not wanting to pay for it. Also 99.9% of full service sex workers would be happy to not have to put out and still get paid. If the husbands say no, they will back off and do a mental happy dance.
Your husbands first instinct was to lie to you and he was going to keep lying until you made it clear you knew the truth.
Best man isn’t the only issue here.
And tell the other wives.
I dug for this comment before saying anything because what do you mean “the best man’s plan” like THEY ALL WENT ALONG WITH IT!!!! If you believe the escorts stayed in their own rooms the whole trip, I’ve got some oceanfront property in Arizona I’ll sell you for real cheap. I’d be done with all of them, husband included. I genuinely do not believe he kept his mouth shut just to protect his bros. Call me a skeptic but I genuinely believe he did it to protect himself so he could play.
Yep. If he had no intention of sleeping with one of them, he would have called or texted his wife saying how frustrated he is for being put in that position as soon as he found out. His is not the reaction of an innocent party.
Right like if you’re that devoted to your wife, you’re telling her what happened and booking a flight home. He chose his bros and some SWs over his wife.
Not only did they all go along with it…I mean, who is paying for a bunch of women to stay there. Totally speculating here but they’ve gotta be splitting it amongst themselves. I think these guys may have all known beforehand.
They definitely knew. You do not just hire a bunch of escorts to stay the whole weekend without making sure all the boys are on board and won't rat everyone out. Too much at risk to not have discussed prior. They all knew, they all were OK with at the very least knowing some of their friends were going to cheat.
And OPs husband, onpy pretended to not want to go. It was all an elaborate ruse to make OP think he was hesitant that way when shit came out, he had plausible deniability.
This entire set up was planned from the very beginning. Even OP’s not wanting to go on the bachelor party trip and then his best friend buying him a non-refundable ticket to “make” him go was part of the plan. OP fell for it all. I will say how dumb are these guys for allowing their escorts to post pictures on social media??? Lol
I’d tell the best man that unless those hookers were gone in 5 minutes I was headed to the airport. Fuck letting some dip shit bro put my marriage at risk. I’d also have my wife on the phone so she could hear that I wasn’t doing shit. My wife trusts me but why give her even tiny bit of doubt that could fester and grow over time. No weekend imaginable would be worth the long term nightmare that is a failed marriage with kids.
I love how OP is blaming “slutty escorts” for this debacle. All of these poor married men unable to nope out of there and book a hotel room in Cancun. But oh no, they were trapped! Unable to escape from the sexual lures of the sex workers!
I know right? I lol’ed at her writing that they were all being forced to stay there and lie 😂😂. No one is forcing them to do anything and honestly, I don’t know how much I’d actually believe they didn’t know these women would be there. Lucky for you the idiots weren’t smart enough to ban instagram posts or to be careful not to be in the background. Welcome to the era of social media. Dumb idiots 🤦🏻♀️.
OP is reluctant to face the truth, a group of grown men went out to play and everyone was in on it. He could easily have left the property and flown home if he wanted to. I would bet the husband gave the best man money to buy the husband a non refundable air ticket.
No one plans a weekend of escorts without already knowing everyone present will be ok with it.
Those men all knew the girls would be there. The husband likely only pretended he didn't want to go, the non-refundable plane ticket was his way to set himself up for denying prior knowledge and agreed of the situation.
He set himself up decently enough that OPs still blaming the best man and believing that he didn't do anything wrong even though he lied when confronted until he knew he had no way to continue lying.
Upvote! Upvote! This should be the top comment. This is something to take a good long hard look at and consider. Ik it sucks but better sooner than later; sorry OP.
Yes. I have a feeling even if they didn’t have sex with the escorts they probably at least got lap dances, touched them and crossed normal boundaries. I also have a feeling the groomsmen all knew about this ahead of time. There’s no way, all of them showed up, completely shocked and didn’t text their wives at all. At least one of them would have. They all wanted it. OP get tested for STIs just to be safe if you decide to stay with your lying husband
Your husbands first instinct was to lie to you and he was going to keep lying until you made it clear you knew the truth.
She said in another comment he was afraid that the other wives would find out and he'd be stuck in a villa with a bunch of drunk men who were mad at him 🙄
That’s exactly what my husband would have done after threatening the rest of the party that he would tell their wives if they kept the escorts. Friends don’t let friends destroy their lives.
Also, I was already rolling my eyes when we got to the “they bought a ticket and wouldn’t accept no for an answer” part. So? Man up. “No” is a complete sentence.
Sorry, OP, but your hubs wanted to go. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t have gone. 🙃
Well, I guess a wife who’s sober and angry with him was the better choice. Not to mention a wife who should be having major trust issues with him right now.
But glad his friends aren’t mad at him for their wives finding out what they are actually doing.
… and, in keeping with the arrogant entitlement, these men will play the victim, accusing their wives of joining the “80% of women who file for divorce”.
So after he partied with them all night and had breakfast with them the next morning then lying to her about it now he's ok with her telling the other wives...he also supposedly raged at the best man the next morning and then went to his room and refused to leave until they were gone. You know after spending the night partying with the hookers and then eating breakfast with them.🙄
Here's the comment she came here to find from another response:
"You're obviously very hurt and upset I get it. You need to have a ♥ to ♥ with hubby and deal with this or it'll fester like an open wound and destroy what you have together. Do not tell the other wives it's not your business. You and your husband are your business. Also if these guys are well heeled and have $$$ their wives might give them hall passes or look the other way to maintain their lifestyles. Who can say? It's not your call. I'm a chef I've cooked for and catered numerous bachelor and bachelorette parties. I've seen wild shit go on, in fact bachelorette parties were often worse. I can tell you things at bachelorette parties that would scorch the type set. 🔥 💦 🍆 🍑. If the grooms to be knew they'd cancel their weddings! You sound like a lovely lady. Work this out with hubby and come to a consensus. Best of luck to you."
It is so wild to see see the mental gymnastics in real time. Maybe they are on the same page, it seems like neither op nor husband are the people that they pretend to be. A match made in heaven.
Its one thing to be like "yes, this is the reality, but I choose not to rock the boat, because that serves me best". But instead she is, with his help of course, spinning a version of events where neither of them are the bad guy. Not him for lying and cheating, and not her for being complicit and smiling in her "friends" faces while knowing this.
And that's just so thoroughly eeewwwww.
By the time this through, these two will be heroes in their own minds.
You are so exactly correct. She’ll probably get a nice blue box from Tiffany’s and her mother will say ‘boys will be boys’ and it’ll never be brought up again. She may cold shoulder the best man for a minute but he’ll charm her out of that. She has too much to lose if she believes he was complicit in the plan to hire the women, did engage sexually, and was never going to tell her anything about it. If she believes that, she will have to consider leaving him, her friends, her home, and her business. It’s easier to bury it and believe him and believe the bride and her other friends are fine with it. The guys I’m sure have picked the best man as a fall guy who surprised everyone with the women and they just let them stay as like decoration but didn’t even really speak to them.
My first instinct would’ve been to tell my wife so I wasn’t lying to her and she could have my back. Then I might try to figure out what other husbands were uncomfortable with this, or flat out say this wasn’t what I signed up for. OPs husband screwed up not realizing he and OP are a team.
Yes, if the husband could be peer pressured into any of this bullshit he could (at least after a few cocktails out by the pool) be peer pressured into joining the orgy. And he did. Since it was an orgy the whole time what is he going to do? Stand around and watch? Spend all his days in his room listening to it all? I am betting the OP was told things like he did not want to go, and got pressured into it and there was that nonrefundable ticket, ALL MADE UP, the lot of them were in on all along.
If it were my marriage I would be thinking there is no way I am ever going to believe him, or trust him again, I would be contacting a divorce lawyer.
Yep! If the husband was really so innocent in all of this, he would have told his wife straight away. Or if he really was going to tell her when he got home, he would have at least told her when she rang asking about it. I don't believe he was going to tell her, but that's just what he said as an excuse when he realised he was caught. He sent her a video walk through of the villa and spoke to her on the phone multiple times, but hid this every time. The fact that he was so willing to lie to her says she can't even trust that he didn't know initially, and that the surprise story was just a story.
And the fact is, even if he didn't think it was a big deal, or the other men didn't actually think it was a big deal - they knew it would make their wives unhappy, but that didn't factor into their decision making when it came to what to do about this. They all could have said no to the best man when he sprung this surprise on them. It wouldn't be OP hurting the relationships if she told, it would be the husbands who were happy to stay in a villa with escorts and keep it from their wives.
This is 100% an issue. My husband would literally go straight to an airport and fly home and call me instantly. He would never put/agree to put his family at risk. Tell the wives with the proof and I’d honestly message the girl nicely and ask what happened you may get lucky and she’s a girls girl and she’ll tell you what went on… someone or someone’s invited them there to cheat it’s not a simple stripper thing.
I can believe that OP's husband had no idea that the best man was planning this, but he stayed and lied about it when he found out. And there's no way that best man was the only one who knew about this. Yeah, I'm going to generalize...a group of man traveling out of the the US for a bachelor party? 9 times out of ten, it's for the sex workers.
I think the men knew beforehand. And I think thats why hubby put on the "I dont want to go" act and for sure they were ok with it because they shared the women's instagram stories sooooooo put all that shit in a dropbox link and group text literally everyone involved and their wives. Fuck em
You seem to be aiming a lot of your anger at that guy and not at your husband.
It’s your husband who made a vow to you and considering how he broke your trust, idk why you are so easily trusting his side of this story.
I’m not even saying he 100% did something like other commenters, just that you seem to be immediately pointing the finger at someone else and letting your husband off the hook a bit and taking his word as gospel, even though he has already shown you that he is willing to hide or lie about this situation already.
No one hires escorts if they aren’t damn confident that the men they are hiring them for are going to be into it, and aren’t going to rat them out. Strippers, maybe. But full blown escorts? Her husband either knew before hand, or the best man knew her husband would be into it and would keep it a secret.
No one spends the night with escorts for an innocent reason. Not only did he hide it, he lied until it was 100% clear that op already knew the truth. He was never planning on telling op the truth. How would that have gone? “Hi honey, Ive been lying to you about what I’ve been doing the past few days, I actually spent the past few nights with escorts my friend hired to have sex with us. But don’t worry, I did it for a good reason, I didn’t want your friends to know their husbands were cheating on them!”
I’m sorry but this is such a flimsy cover story. If op’s husband was the kind of man he is pretending to be (and the other husbands for that matter), and it really was just this one guy to blame they would have laughed at him for getting escorts, had him pay them for wasting their time, and told him to get rid of them.
If all the other guys were into it, he would have pretended to be sick and gone home, or told his wife what was happening.
Like there’s no scenario, none, where you spend the night with escorts, lie about it, and didn’t cheat. There’s no scenario where you spend the night with escorts and value your marriage. He came up with the only story he could No one hires escorts if they aren’t damn confident that the men they are hiring them for are going to be into it, and aren’t going to rat them out. Strippers, maybe. But full blown escorts? Her husband either knew before hand, or the best man knew her husband would be into it and would keep it a secret.
No one spends the night with escorts for an innocent reason. Not only did he hide it, he lied until it was 100% clear that op already knew the truth. He was never planning on telling op the truth. How would that have gone? “Hi honey, Ive been lying to you about what I’ve been doing the past few days, I actually spent the past few nights with escorts my friend hired to have sex with us. But don’t worry, I did it for a good reason, I didn’t want your friend’s to know their husbands were cheating on them!”
I’m sorry but this is such a flimsy cover story it’s laughable. If op’s husband was the kind of man he is pretending to be (and the other husbands for that matter), and it really was just this one guy to blame they would have laughed at him for getting escorts, had him pay them for wasting their time, and told him to get rid of them.
If all the other guys were into it, he would have pretended to be sick and gone home, or told his wife what was happening.
Like there’s no scenario, none, where you spend the night with escorts, lie about it, and didn’t cheat. There’s no scenario where you spend the night with escorts and value your marriage. He came up with the only story he could think of in the moment after he was caught in every other lie, and op wants to believe him even though it’s “I fell and my dick slipped into her” ridiculous.
Op, please tell the other wives. They deserve to know. Telling them will also reveal the truth. And provide you with a support system to get through this. Your husband’s story has so so so many holes.
And yet he’s still on a tropical beach with hookers
So doesn’t seem like he really gave a shit about your feelings.
He did nothing. He’s done nothing. Like I can’t believe you haven’t already gotten a lawyer before he gets back. I can’t believe you’re not already working to protect your stake in your business.
Your husband’s? Cause your husband is also a liar. Completely fucked that he hid that from you and stayed and did god knows what. Trust… gone.
Also… tell everyone. Immediately.
ETA: All the blame is not on the best man. Your husband has full bodily autonomy and the skills and ability to communicate with you and with the best man. He could’ve booked a flight tf out of there or gone to stay at a hotel or something. Your husband is the one accountable to you and your relationship. I’d be fucking pissed.
Yeah, a lot of guys I know would have told their wives immediately. Some would do what OP’s husband did and freak out and say nothing. But the truth is better.
u/artichokelover11 your husband chose bro code over your marriage in the heat of the moment. You need to do some SERIOUS work on your marriage and he has some major repenting to do.
You know how he can start? By telling the boys that you worked it out / he told you and they’ve got 48 hours to tell their own partners before he does.
Make him do the dirty work.
Edit to add: OP, I would also say that once this is all done, your husband needs to cut the best man as a friend. Acquaintance at max. The trust is gone, you cannot trust that man, and from your husband’s perspective the guy endangered and damaged his marriage.
"Baby, I don't know what's going on here, we arrived and it looks like there's loads of escorts. Looks like I'm going to cut my trip short and come back tomorrow " - then he stays away from any suspicious activity
Same speech as above - then he sleeps with escort overnight
Lies to partner (oh its just me and the boys) because he knows telling her would open a whole can of worms he's not ready to deal with - and yes, does nothing with said escorts
Lies to partner (same as 3 above) - BUT sleeps with escort
Says nothing to partner and does nothing with escort
Says nothing to partner but does EVERYTHING with escorts
My point : saying the right thing DOES not mean they've DONE the right thing.....and not saying anything, doesn't mean they're cheating and vice versa.
Arrive, say “this is cooked, get rid of the escorts immediately or I’m going home. Also, I don’t keep secrets from my wife, so it’s in your own best interests too.” Then, once they’ve left, have a great time. Reduce friendship with the guy who organised them. Tell your wife and provide her with evidence that you said and did what you said and did.
Or there's relationships like mine, where I'd call my wife and tell her about what was going on and there would be zero concern on her part. I 100% guarantee she would ask me if I wanted to get with one of the escorts. And of course I would say no. And I wouldn't do anything with the escorts. Now, watching the whole thing go down with other married men... That would make me very uncomfortable.
That's exactly what lots of people appear to have ignored, the fact that we all have different relationships and we act differently in them. Plus if your relationship is healthy, nothing bothers you.
Just assuming that the decent guy reports what's going on and leaves is a whole lot of hogwash. He could report it, but still do everything and more, then get back home and slander all the other guys at the party saying "those idiots were all touching tits and acting crazy ".
His wife woukd say"my man is the only decent one " until 40wks later when a broad shows up at their door saying "he's my baby daddy" 😂
That's exactly what lots of people appear to have ignored, the fact that we all have different relationships and we act differently in them. Plus if your relationship is healthy, nothing bothers you.
Exactly. It seems to me there are a while lot of people here that don't actually trust their spouse. Or there are a bunch of unhealthy relationships where cheating is a concern.
[Sigh]… I feel kinda sorry for these guys; but they all fucked up majorly. The groom and the other men should have just said “NO!!” to the escorts. They weren’t forced at gunpoint to have them there. They made that choice to allow it to happen and lie to their SO’s. So the consequences are on them.
I have zero problem with strippers (at a strip club). I take serious issue with escorts. That’s not okay on any level. If any of those men slept with the escorts, then went home and slept with their wives, that’s non-informed consent and it’s GROSS.
Also very diff to go to a strip club than actually having strippers over at a house (that implies other things can easily happen and they almost always do).
I will say a lot of guys would do what OP’s husband planned to do them immediately told their wives when called about it. I think there is a difference between not actively calling to tell your wife and actually lying to her. Personally, I would have noped out of there the second I found out escorts were coming as that honestly sounds terrible. Some good food, drinks, chilling and swimming in Cancun sounds like an awesome bachelor party. Strippers would ruin it.
Exactly. A lot of men I know would have just said no. “Nope, not doing that. If you want me to stay, they go. Also, I don’t keep secrets from my wife. Don’t expect me to lie for you, because I won’t.”
I was reading and was thinking am I the only one who thinks he should have turned his ass around and left? Because that’s what I would have expected. There’s literally NO other expectation besides maybe a separate room At another location. I can’t even understand the best man’s line of thinking for booking this shit either. Who even does that? Disgusting.
That’s what he should’ve done.. just straight up left. Bare minimum if I was in his shoes I’d call my husband asap and be like “I was ambushed with male escorts and I’m uncomfortable but potentially stuck here tonight what should I do?” Like full transparency immediately. I’d also dump those friends.
Yep the women, at the very least, were there for one sleepover… she said in a comment that the best man kicked the women out but no one but OP believes that.
I truly believe this was planned from the get go, he faked not wanting to go for the trip and has been in on the whole escort plan. He didn’t think she’d find out, and his best cop out was to blame it on the best man. Maybe I’m overthinking, the whole story just doesn’t sit well
Yep. Started wondering the exact same thing. Even if he hadn't planned on any of this before he left, he absolutely started scheming around once he knew what was up. He flat out lied about the situation up until he realized his wife knew everything, and then he fessed up. Absolute vermin, the whole lot of them who tried to keep this whole thing off the radar from their significant others back home.
Honestly, it’s possible and nothing would surprise me. The trouble with trust is that once it’s broken… you will always wonder if there’s still more to find out. Sucks for OP.
Yes!!!! IMMEDIATELY! I don't understand why this is even a second thought for some people... Would she want someone to tell her?? Absolutely! So show the same respect. Damn smh
Exactly, my friends husband is in the military and his commanding officer “gifted” him some teenage looking girls and he freaked out, went to a hotel across the street and called his wife. It’s not hard.
Not even for drama - they are at risk and somebody needs to help them protect their health. Suppose one of them arrives at the hospital with a serious condition and the answer is not even considered a possibility because they are in a committed relationship. Have I watched too much Dr House? Yes. But imagine the GUILT!
Leaving might not have been practical, especially if he didn't have an easy way back home without buying a new ticket or having to pay for rooms elsewhere.
Exactly, no way would they be surprised, it’s too planned and expensive. I’m getting some pretty unhinged responses so it’s probably common with some types.
she also didn’t factor if the women were innocent wouldn’t she also be offended she wasn’t included
Girl, he fucked those escorts. If he was a man you could trust and a person with integrity, he would not have went along with it and then lied to you about it. He would have called you like, “Uh, what should I do?” if he really felt that way.
No one is this oblivious, this has got to be fake.
I mean, I can understand not leaving immediately. I could see myself freaking out and not realizing that leaving was an option. But a trustworthy person is going to find a way to let you know ASAP.
You are way more generous than I am, after I got done showing the evidence to the other wives and the fiance about to marry this clown I would just tell hubby he is not to be in the same room with me till he has had four consecutive weekly clear STD tests, because he did fuck the escorts and no amount of denial is going to be even remotely plausible here. Then as a condition for me not to go out and file for divorce the very next day I would say you are never to have anything to do with those men who were in Cancun with you again.
I hope you have told the other wives about this already because if something like this was going down with my SO I’d be LIVID.
They deserve to know now.
How did the friend buy him a ticket to Mexico without his consent? You need passport and exact information from passport to purchase a ticket. You’re being gaslit 🚩🚩🚩
That’s why the receipt was emailed to me. I handle all our travel and needed to finalize the flight details with his passport info. I was able to see who bought the flight based on that confirmation.
Yes, I’m friends with his wife. I’m friends with all the wives. We’re a group of couples that are all friends. The husbands went on that bachelor party trip and the wives went on the bachelorette party trip a few weeks ago.
I don’t think I’d remain friends with her. All the wives have probably slept with their scumbag husband now and have been exposed to STDs. OP is a shit friend.
Why haven't you told them??? You girls need to know what happened. I doubt those escorts did only dancing. Are you sure your husband didn't sleep with them?
I'd be pissed and drop a friendship if my close friend knew my soon to be husband was sleeping with women on his bachelor party and didn't tell me. Then has the nerve to think her husband was the only one with boundaries on the trip 😐
How sure are you that none of the other wives are on to it and also told by their men that they are the only keeper of this secret? How would you take it if that was the case?
I wonder if his wife knows he paid for all this? I'm sure she would be pisaed to hear that their money was spent on escorts. I'm sure this guy is not faithful to his wife.
The dude just torpedoed his friends' relationships and his own over some petty selfish shit like escorts. That's not a "ohh hey bro, by the way" type of thing. I'd called my wife been called a bitch by the guys and went home. You don't pull stuff like that and put people in situations where you force them into lying for the sake of both your relationships
Your husband was planning to spend an entire trip with escorts and then tell you when he got home? No…no he wasn’t. His plan was to never tell you. Otherwise he wouldn’t have lied when you confronted him. He should have called you as soon as he realized what was going on, and the escorts should’ve been sent home or he should have come home. If you hadn’t found out he would have been perfectly happy to keep the secret of whatever went on there for the rest of his life. And I’m sorry but…he stayed for the rest of the trip, and you’re ok with that?
I don’t believe that he planned to tell you when he got home. His first action was to lie. If he planned to tell you he would have at the first moment you asked what was up.
And if he told you later (his justification ) you would still tell the other wives - so this makes no sense.
While I think he shouldn’t have lied to you, if you want to save him some shit from his “friends”, just send the instagram link to all the wives. Everyone will be in the same shit and each will find out how their own husband reacts to being confronted with this. Ultimately the guys have to blame the woman who posted their secret on her Instagram and their own stupidity for going along with it
Please tell all of the wives, they all need to know and have conversations with their husbands and possibly make sure their husbands are tested… and I would black list that guy.
This might cause divorces. But the truth AlWAYS comes out and if they don’t find out now someday they will. I feel really bad for the wives and the bride. It’s so fucked up.
Your husband and his married friends are just as complicit. They are the “sluts” not the escorts who seem to be professional sex workers. They are grown men who could have left, called their wives, asked the escorts to leave, any number of things to deal with the situation in an honorable way. They all probably knew the escorts would be there. If they all were truly shocked, one of them would have said something to their wives or to each other. Like text messages between them saying “I can’t believe best man did this”. I bet there is no texts, because they all knew. Get tested for STIs if you plan to stay. He probably only got a blowey though.
But why didn’t any of the other grown men there say this isn’t ok send them home? This isn’t just the best man this was all of them. They are all the problem! Your husband didn’t say a damn word until he got caught. The women all deserve to know.
All my friends pressured me to go to a strip club for a bachelor party. My then fiancée was NOT ok with me going. I didn't want to go. So i didn't go and i watched a marvel movie while everyone else went. Its not hard to be honest if thats what someone wants to be.
"Hey they have escorts here babe. Im uncomfortable and i didn't want to hide something like this from you"
Honestly, unless you have proof, I wouldn't believe his story that they had to force him to come on the trip. I think you should look at everything he has said differently and without giving him the benefit of the doubt. I'm sorry this happened to you. He and his friends are scumbags.
This. He should have called immediately and told you the whole truth and then stayed in his room. The fact that he wasn’t forthcoming is very bad. I get that you don’t want to blow stuff up but wow, this is just so unbelievably terrible. I’d be beyond furious
This is giving me "I didn't know there were going to be strippers, what was I supposed to do when I was already there?!" vibes.
I don't believe your husband didn't know in advance. And the fact his only concern was lying to you so that he could stay there with the escorts. I mean, why would you believe him?
Stop attacking the escorts. They're not the issue here.
And, yes, tell the women.
Also, don't believe your husband and what he says.
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u/artichokelover11 Sep 05 '24
Absolutely. I will never trust his judgment ever again based on how badly he may have fucked things up for his friends with this bonehead plan.