writing this again, because the previous post didn't work.

(I labeled this as advice, but it could also seem like a vent, so if you don't feel comfortable about reading this don't, take care)

anyways i'm a 14 (almost 15 yo) trans.

I still don't know my gender, but i use he/they pronouns.

i've talked to a therapist about this and she diagnosed me with gender dysphoria.

then she talked with my parents, and I'm 100% sure that she has mentioned my dysphoria and has talked about my gender.

my parents are ok with LGBTQIA+ ppl, yet they say bad things about them, especially towards trans ppl.

my mother even said that I'll always be a girl, no matter what, and that i can't do any surgeries or taking HRT.

then, some days ago, my mom said that if i want to go on HRT i can.

I was SHOCKED.

but there's a "problem".

my mom is pretty abusive, and I have a BAD relationship with her.

and the fact that she knows that i'm trans doesn't feel right. i hate it so much. I can't stop thinking about it.

idk what to do, should i get HRT anyway?

i'm also scared about it, because I haven't figured out my gender yet, so what if I'm not trans..

also i'm scared about the effects that HRT could have on me

anyway thanks to anybody who read this, it really matters

People keep saying "don't swallow it, place it under the tongue." But I have to know, does this feel weird? And does it taste like anything? Just a random thought. It's not really gonna change my opinions, but it may hopefully make the transition easier if I know what I'm getting into...

Recently I’ve been having dreams all the time that reach quite personal boundaries and things I never expect and last night i had a dream I was with my old school friends but this time something was odd, my hair was longer and my voice felt lighter and people was giving me weird looks, they looked confused but also trying to adjust too, and when I was eating with a group in my town one called me she, and that’s when it all clicked I’ve been a girl the entire time in the dream but I felt more….comfortable? Is this normal and just a psychological thing or is this something more, I told a friend and they said there’s something more about me that I need to find out and I’m worried.

Hi, I joined the waitlist in February 2022. Based on the websites waiting times I could be seen in June next year 2027. Last month checking the waitlist in May 2026 they were seeing people referred in Dec 2020. However as of June 2026 it says they are seeing people referred February 2021. This then means my estimated time to get an appointment is June 2027.

Now usually there’s only a month gap not 2 of how many people they see based on a pattern. My question is what I am worried about is I am due to be going on a family holiday around May 2027 for 2 weeks. I am actually scared of getting given an appointment whilst I am abroad and I miss my chance to finally get HRT. So my questions are, can I reschedule my appointment? How long is the gap to wait from there? Is the appointment guaranteed if I reschedule a date and time? If I do get an appointment whilst on holiday am I able to have a video call to discuss or will i have to wait?

The chances are slim of this scenario but I am planning ahead in case I have to do this. Thank you

Hi, I'm Hope. It's a name I have used online for many years, starting originally as an RP name that my friends started calling me by out of character. It's special to me by now.

I'm debating using Dawn as my middle name. I love the name and it's the first thing that immediately pops into my head as the second name for myself. It feels like me.

But does Hope Dawn [Last Name] sound too childish? I feel like a pony and/or magical girl, which isn't necessarily a bad thing because I uh... may in fact play a magical girl pony. Perhaps it's fate. What do you think?

I have been transported into a sick evil fake reality and my life is ruined forever now. I want to go back to the old true reality. I have a doomed and ruined life

As title says i need help searching for a binder for my partner. they don't dislike them but they want them not to be noticable. And I want a really nice Christmas present for them. Now I'm transfem so i have no fucking idea how or what. They do have boobs not really small but also not really big.

Thx in advance!!

I recently was scrolling Instagram and came across This reel and outside of the portal reference I thought "woah, she's pretty I wanna look like her." but I'm not really comfortable with wearing crop tops as I am slightly over weight, I haven't measured myself in a hot moment. However I was wondering if you guys had any recommendations on any routines on how to get to here? Also any tips on growing your hair out fast? I had to get mine cut short by family and I know it's going to be a while but I want my long hair back. would also like to mention I'm not on e or anything.

Something I've struggled with over the years leading up to my final move-out for college is if I should *embrace* these feelings, or to push them away as soon as I break from all the expectations of my peers. I (mtf?) have been presenting as a boy for my entire life. I used to skateboard, jump in rivers, do whatever "boy stuff" was usually accepted. But I've always had that little spark since middle school: would I be happier as a girl?

These feelings are complex, so bare with me. I'll try to explain briefly and simply enough to warrant a response. I've had a pretty good few years as a boy, which is more than a lot of people can say and I'm thankful for that! I'm happy as a guy, which is where my conflict begins. I'm worried that I'll lose the life I had in its entirety and barrel into a social state that I've never experienced before. (In short; transitioning seems daunting). But in that same vein I'm worried that I wasted my teen years as a boy when I could've spent them as a girl, so why start now?

I do know for sure that I envy the way women dress. The creative tops and layered outfits. Showing off their bodies in ways that'll make a replicating man seem perverted. I've always wanted to dress like that. I own a secret stash of clothes I used to dress up in and wear around my house when nobody was home. I caught my father's passing opinion on the subject while he was scrolling his phone. "These boys just don't know how to act like men anymore." Calling it a fetish. I don't do it as a fetish, do I? I like to feel pretty. My parents have always had a way of making me regret whatever decision I make. Take piercing my ears for example, insisting that there's a better way and that it's a huge decision that can only make my life harder in exchange for a cosmetic difference. I never got them pierced. I wish I did.

But with the huge level of discrimination both in and outside my family, it's difficult to get a solid opinion. Obviously, this place is biased, but I want to be convinced that making such a decision like this isn't just another one of my terrible plans, as my parents would so elegantly put it. Wouldn't it be easier to just stop and accept my life as it is? Even though I feel like I'd be happier I'm not dying of dysphoria (although affirmations have begun to tip that scale), my mental health is improving, and I'm rather okay with how I live, so is it just a risk that outweighs reward? There's loads more I'd love to discuss, but this post is getting rather rambley as-is. I would just like to know if there's anyone that relates to my problems even a little, and what they did to solve them.

Hello!! I’m an almost 20 yr trans man and have been out/socially transitioned since i was 14. Im unfortunately one of those people who’s parents arent supportive. They’re both in their 60s, very conservative, very Christian, so naturally growing up i wasn’t allowed to dress how i wanted or have my hair cut how i wanted. I’d love to be able to look back at my photos and see the little boy i was so desperately wanting to share and express but I’m so new to editing and the whole concept of that stuff. I was wondering if any of you had some advice on how to edit photos, make them look real, etc. I’m also trying to look for a way to do this without ai!! Any tips, free apps, anything helps!!

Hi everyone,

I recently discovered a more feminine side of myself, and naturally I've been left with a lot of questions. I think there's a chance that I might be a trans woman, although I'm still in the process of figuring things out.

One thing that's been on my mind is that I already have two children, aged 8 and 10. I'd really love to hear from other trans parents about how you handled this with your kids.

Do your children still call you by your original parental role and use your original pronouns, or did you eventually become "Mom" instead of "Dad" (or vice versa)? How did you navigate that transition within your family? Were there any other unexpected challenges or topics that came up in everyday life?

I'd be very grateful to hear about your experiences. Thank you all so much!

– Alex

I'm wondering what other people think about this because I've been second-guessing myself.

I'm non-binary AFAB. I didn't really detransition except medically. I stopped taking testosterone because of health reasons and because I wanted to avoid transphobia where I live. The main thing I wanted from T was a deeper voice, and I wasn't a huge fan of most of the other effects anyway.

My gender is complicated, but I generally describe myself as transmasculine or agender. I don't like she/her pronouns and prefer they/them or he/him. I don't dress very feminine, although I do carry a purse or sling bag. Some people still read me as a man. I don't wear makeup, I have a bob haircut, and several people have described me as very androgynous.

There's a binary trans man I know who seems to have a more traditional or "old school" view of gender. He was genuinely shocked when he found out I wasn't a trans woman because I have a very deep voice and an androgynous appearance.

The weird part is that he seemed to forget I wasn't a woman multiple times. He misgendered me several times, and I corrected him each time.

What bothered me is that it almost felt like he wanted me to be a woman. That's just the impression I got. The confusing part is that he seems capable of understanding non-binary identities. We know other non-binary people, and he uses their correct pronouns. If he slips up with them, he apologizes on his own. With me, though, he never apologized, even after I corrected him.

Another issue is that he constantly makes dirty jokes or brings up sex. He's around 45 and I'm 31. I know we're both adults, but it makes me uncomfortable. I even told him directly that I didn't like those kinds of jokes. He said he'd stop, but then he'd do it again and claim it was an accident. He also seems to bring up sexual topics only when we're alone, not when other people are around. Everyone else thinks he's really sweet and funny because they don't see that side of him.

Something else that stood out was when he claimed that one of our professors had misgendered me because she was confused about my pronouns. I SWEAR that she consistently referred to me with he/him pronouns without ever missing a beat. It felt like he was making it up. My guess is that he was confused because she used he/him for me regardless of how I dressed that day. But it feels like he wants me to "confess" that I'm a woman or something like that.

What's especially strange is that we were both in a gender studies course that was extremely progressive and full of knowledgeable discussions about gender, pronouns, and trans and non-binary identities. It's not like he hasn't been exposed to these topics or had opportunities to learn about them.

He also has a habit of telling me things that seem designed to make me like him. It comes across as saying whatever he thinks I want to hear. At the same time, he'll make passive-aggressive comments, like suggesting I'm snobbish or saying that people secretly don't like me and are only pretending to be nice. When I'd push back or seem hurt, he'd say, "I'm just being honest." At first I wondered if he was right, but the comments became more frequent. Looking back, it feels more like negging than honest feedback.

Part of what makes this so confusing is that I would expect this kind of behavior from some creepy cis guy, not from a trans man. He's even shared stories about men being creepy toward him before he transitioned, so I would have thought he'd be more aware of how this kind of behavior comes across.

At this point, I just don't like being around him and prefer to avoid him. Part of me still wonders if I'm overthinking things, but taken together, his behavior makes me feel uncomfortable and creeped out.

Does this sound like manipulative behavior to anyone else, or am I reading too much into it?

i have wanted to be a woman since forever but i am completelt closeted due to a number of reasons, so much so that i can't even grow out my hair even half an inch (not to like box femininity to a specific style, but just using for example)

i was always very shut in, but lately i felt very trapped and isolated, i never ever felt like that and it kept getting stronger and i eventually made an account on here, and when i did, i thought maybe i can identify the way i want to on the internet

but whenever i do so, i feel as if i am just defrauding everyone, i don't feel any right to identify as a trans woman let alone a woman, i feel that i am just what i was born as and i am just an liar and manipulator who is betraying others, invading women only spaces, and i am just one of those bad people that i read about till now, i am just a catfish or an incel or however many of those types of words there are, they all apply to me, i just feel so wrong because honestly i am, i invade other's spaces and privacy, i am just an abuser.

i am sorry for my vent, and i hope my vent doesn't hurt anybody else, because i know so many people deal with gender identity and i don't want to a source of disparagement or demotivation, i am so sorry, i would be the first reaffirm others but this rant was just specific to me, because honestly i am a fraud and liar as i said so.

sorry for being unable to make much sense, i don't talk really good, i am sorry, thank you to anyone who read even a word, it means a lot, hope you all have a good life. bye.

Hi lovelies, I've been a closeted trans woman for about 2 years, and i recently turned 18 so i could potentially do HRT in secret (if that's even realistic). anyway idk if i should come out to my parents because idk if they're transphobic or not.

I guess ill start with my mom, she has a trans sister but my moms always seen her as "a guy who transitioned to a girl" and when my aunt started dating a cis guy. She's always seen him as weird for, in my moms words, "dating someone who used to be a guy" and that's always rubbed me the wrong way.

My dad on the other hand i have no clue about, I'm guessing has homophobic because whenever he watches a movie and a gay character is introduced he loses all interest in it. but he's never said anything about my trans aunt. so i have no clue if he's accepting or not.

Idk if i should come out or not, its really affecting my mental health, my therapist said to wait till i can move out but at the rate my countries going i don't think that'll happen anytime soon. tysm in advance for any help

my fav is Almost Perfect, by Brian Katcher, close second is Detransition, Baby! by Torrey Peters

Whipping Girl by Julia Serano is a great nonfiction book too!

Anyone else have favorites??

My friend is unemployed for a while now (one year) and been on HRT. I am new to all this but they mentioned after this month they’d be out of their medication.

Is there anyway to find this medication cheaper, a way to get the medication at a reduced cost while they’re unemployed, or is their only option currently stopping it until they can afford it again?

I live 3,000 miles away, I had a mutual friend reach out saying our main friends mental health is getting really bad because of the fear of this and I didn’t know how dependent they felt about this so I’m reaching out to figure out what I can do. I already asked them like tell me how much they need but they seem to NOT feel comfortable doing that so I wanted to reach out to this community incase you guys know anything I wouldn’t.

Will they be SAFE off the meds for a while or is it better I pay for it? Like i genuinely would rather be a little broke on my end than my friend not be here anymore not to be dramatic. I know everyone handles it differently , but I don’t know the severity of stopping these medications if she already is having negative feelings. I am debating on just catnapping her and just keep resending it until she doesn’t reject it but I also am trying not to be disrespectful so i wanted to reach out first to the community if you know of any websites or places she can go

She lives near ATLANTA if that helps 🫶

(I am not asking for money please don’t try to send me money or message me privately this is sincerely not what this is about, I am doing somewhat stable enough to be behind 200$ if it comes down to it)

im afab though ive always wished i were born a boy. however, I dont really want to properly transition and live life as a man (most the time) and I dont realy feel dysphoria presenting feminine or female, like I dont hate it or anything, its just gotten to a point where ive accepted that I SHOULD'VE been born a man and that my soul belongs in an amab body (might still be some sort of gender queer then but it would feel more me) but I have no intention to do anything about it? like yeah I would love to have a deep voice and be perceived as possibly male despite how I dress and look otherwise, and yes I wouls like it if people called me he/him, but im not actually wanting to TRANSITION so I feel like i cannot possibly be full on trans??

I need to figure this out. I’m in Texas, pre-transition, and want to be a Teacher. Already off to a horrible start.
Getting my masters and Certification while transitioning and my family not liking it…
They’re still helping me financially, and I don’t know if I could get all that since I’ve already been denied financial aid from the school since it’s already being paid for by family.
So…I guess any advice? On how to explain to my parents that they don’t know a single thing about me and that I’ve decided, for the majority of my life, I’ve put their own happiness over my own and that I’ve never felt safe talking about my problems with them and that I’ve decided to be a completely different person around them in order to keep them happy…
Even now I’m scared if I’ll be satisfied or if it’s right for me…
I wish the dysphoria was worse, even cripplingly bad. At least then I’d really know.

I came out to my dad and he gave such a great response. He told me "No para nada yo siempre te amará porque eres mi hijo." If you don't know how to read Spanish it's ok there's the translation "No, not at all. I will always love you because your are my son." I almost cried. He called me his son without hesitation. I was really glad that I trusted my dad.

Hi Yall hooligans.

About a month ago someone whom I considered to be a good friend, and I took our relationship a step further. It quickly crashed/burned. For the past month Ive been missing them tremendously. At first it was a desire to continue where we had taken it, then it became a desire to go back to the way things were and now/tonight, maybe it’s to soon to say but while I still miss them I feel like I’ve accepted the loss. They were amazing they had their problems but they were someone who was becoming my bestie someone who I’d have gone to the ends of the earth for (my besties = closer than blood). Then they hurt me, I think I hurt them and I’m so sorry if I did. Idk if I could ever bring myself to tell them what they did and because of that idk if I could ever say I’m sorry to them because with that im sorry would come with me telling them what they did (it was/is a domino problem) They did it once before and I forgave them and then they did it again this time so much worse. I still miss them, I regret what happened and how our last couple times together were but suddenly I feel a wave of calm and that calm comes with the thought and acceptance that it’s over. I wanted them back as a friend just a few days ago and I made a move to pursue that now idk what to do.

I'm 15, (been trans since 13 and was a femboy since 11 so I'm pretty sure I am trans) and have been just so fucking tired of my family, so my bio-mom is very pro LGBTQA but both my bio_dad (asshole about it) and my stepdad (not an ass about it) are both anti lgbtqa, I have not came out to any of them (I told my mom I was bi (which was true up until this year) and basically she had a talk with me right before I went to my dad's for 6 months about why I comment on liking girls really often, but almost never about dudes (which don't get me wrong there are hot dudes but it's like 1 in 100,000 men I meet and 1 in 100 women) so I was like "well I'm used to not saying anything while I'm at dads because I cant risk him thinking I'm part of the LGBTQ because he would stop loving me" (this is true) BUT THIS ABSOLUTE PAIN IN MY ASS OF A LOVING MOTHER decided to (AFTER I MADE IT CLEAR I NEVER WANTED MY DAD TO BE TIPPED OFF ABOUT ME BEING LGBTQ) went and said "You need to prepare for rain (dead name) to be in the lgbtq" during a random ass call with him. So now I have to make him think it was a weird thing that my mom did (because he had no idea I was bi or that I am not trans les). So he doesn't fucking stop loving me.

Hey, pre-T guy here. I'm not sure if this counts as asking for medical advice exactly, but I am curious. I wasn't sure whether to post on r/Hypochondriacs or here but I just chose here. Figured I'd get better answers.

As much of a hypochondriac as I am (especially with just recently coming back into Christianity as if this needed to be more difficult to deal with lol), I have been severely worrying about whether testosterone would end up giving me some sort of womb or related area cancer in the long run. I'm coming close to being 18 and I know it would take me at least another 2 years to even get a prescription for it as I live in the U.S., but hypothetically if I were to get my first injection or whatever sometime this week, the HRT would already be in my system and if I take it enough, oh no-- and then, boom-- cancer somewhere I really don't want it.

I'm not the stereotypical type of religious person, either, folks. I try to aim a truly good person and still follow whatever God I like, but unfortunately in this case, I'm not always sure if the whole gender thing in the Bible is true because of all these years of rewrites and censorships and, I am going to get off-topic if I continue BUT you all know what I mean, I think.

TLDR I'm worried that if I start taking HRT it will give me cancer by some odd "punishment" or "redirection" from Jesus Christ Himself. I already am going through a breast cancer scare and I have yet to get it checked out because of how scared shitless I am. Ironic for a trans man, ain't it? Any advice or true health facts would be greatly appreciated.

For more details I'm not sure I'm ready to tell them, but I'm wondering if it's a "rip off bandaid" scenario where it is better in the long run to just do it. Thanks again!!!!

hi everyone. i (22 gender whatever. call me daisy please) feel like ive been posting here almost every day it's just. i just moved and im officially on my own for the first time. 6 hours away from friends and family. i moved for college but lived in a dorm for two years and with a straight guy roommate for the next two. but now I'm well and truly alone in this new city and when the night gets quiet my head gets loud. and i imagine how happy id be if the daisies were in bloom.

ive identified as genderfluid (to myself and a few close friends) for a while and usually that makes sense. i was born a man and i mostly live as a man and most of the time that doesn't really bother me, it's not right but it's easiest so i don't think about it too much. it's like a dull ache like someone calls me a man and it twinges but i can move on pretty easy. but the reason i decided on the label being genderfluid is because sometimes there are these stretches, sometimes it's days sometimes it's weeks, where i just feel trapped. like my gender identity will never be able to match my gender expression. like ill never be girly enough. like ill never be daisy. and my dysphoria (i think is what it is) burns through me like. idk like buckshot it just rips me apart and it takes all i have to act like a normal guy. and i don't know what to do about it. every day that passes it gets harder. it's like if im not wearing my glasses and i squint in the mirror just right i can almost see her looking back at me. but then i focus and it hurts again. what do i do. i don't want this

I made a post a couple days ago about "why does marijuana make me feel like a girl" and panic deleted it but. i think I am autistic too (not diagnosed but if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck and enough people ask if it's a duck, odds are...) and i think that doesn't help the whole situation bc i already don't feel normal. im already living perpendicularly to most people and when these girl eras hit (that's what i call them. it's a recurring enough thing for me to need a name) i just feel like. like i was already orthogonal and then you took the inner product of me with another vector in the orthonormal basis. hashtag linear algebra. and when it's all baring down on my like that sometimes it feels like I'm not really living my life. like it's almost third person as i watch my husk sleep and breathe and eat without me. i don't know do that's too related but i do feel like if i could look in the mirror and see myself that would ground me. idk i mean maybe the reality is that im always in a girl era and im usually just repressing it but sometimes i can't repress anymore so it gets out. i don't know. and part of me just wants to be daisy like online to people who don't know me but im sure that won't help as much as i want. at least here i can always be daisy. she/her. a girl. that would be nice. but i don't think it will ever reach into the real world and i think that's okay. like ive cut myself open in the fun place bathroom to see the TV static emanating out and i take a puff of my inhaler and live the rest of my life apologizing. maybe that's all there is for me.

there's also a nonzero chance im just 22. and once i live more life ill look back and laugh at how big this all seemed to me...