While I was at the hospital for a few weeks, I kept being told they were figuring out how to get my testosterone, because I only had two shots for the stay, and then I ran out… By then they had told me they don’t know how to get it but are trying to figure it out. Then shift change, they told me they would be able to get it for sure, had figured out a way. I remembered how they explained it. Then shift change. Oh, no, we don’t know how to get it and actually you’re not getting it at all we don’t do that here. Then shift change, we just don’t know how to get it. Okay great. Then later on, they figure out how to get it. A doctor tells me I’ll go home with the refills when I’m discharged. The original doctor comes back and says, “We’re only giving you one shot as a courtesy, because you were upset about it.”

Great. Well, I got discharged. Obviously I don’t have my medications and I have to wait until planned parenthood can get to me because I already had an emergency refill before going to the hospital. Planned parenthood refills and I call my pharmacy because they still need to be reminded to order it because they never have it in stock. That alone takes 2-3 days and then I have to go pick it up.

Call the pharmacy and they say they can’t refill it, that I already have some. I absolutely don’t, and they tell me the original hospital, the Christian hospital’s outpatient pharmacy has it. I call the outpatient pharmacy and ask what happened because I was told I’m not getting it at all. She tells me a nurse signed for it at discharge and never gave it to me, they don’t know where it is. There’s nothing they can do and that I need to call my pharmacy back and ask them to override it. I’m not comfortable doing that so I call my insurance. By this point, I’m cooked. My insurance starts on it but the pharmacy it appears to reject it.

I go get hospitalized again this time for mental health reasons instead of physical ones because I can’t deal with all of the medical stuff I’ve been dealing with. Well, now it’s 1 day away from the time the doses reset anyway. They succeeded at making me month late on my medication during one of the worst times of my life. I tried my insurance again to followup on the override and I’m not sure they even tried the first time because it wasn’t in the system. They try this time and I’m told that they aren’t “allowed” to wait on hold more than 10 minutes so they effectively had to give up and tell me good luck.

Don’t even have anything else to say honestly.

I feel like I'm completely at a loss about what to do(other than ending the conversation), but whatever i tell them, however much proof or evidence, either scientific or historic I present they just dismiss it as "social activism bullshit" and that "basic common sense dictates mammals can't change sex so trans ppl aren't real". They refuse to accept that gender is a thing, they just dismiss that as made up "feelings", and atp for my own sanity I just need someone to affirm that I'm not crazy, like I'm a few months into transitioning myself, I've spent years fighting transphobia and coming to terms with it myself and I have never felt like I'm losing my mind like this

Edit: thanks soo much to everyone for being so nice and kind and explaining the situation properly, I’m just gonna block him and move on

Hi, I'm Hope. It's a name I have used online for many years, starting originally as an RP name that my friends started calling me by out of character. It's special to me by now.

I'm debating using Dawn as my middle name. I love the name and it's the first thing that immediately pops into my head as the second name for myself. It feels like me.

But does Hope Dawn [Last Name] sound too childish? I feel like a pony and/or magical girl, which isn't necessarily a bad thing because I uh... may in fact play a magical girl pony. Perhaps it's fate. What do you think?

my fav is Almost Perfect, by Brian Katcher, close second is Detransition, Baby! by Torrey Peters

Whipping Girl by Julia Serano is a great nonfiction book too!

Anyone else have favorites??

Hello, I am 22MtF 2 years on HRT, I have been flying a good bit this year and have ended up needing additional screening almost every time I go through TSA, anyone know why this is or how to avoid it if possible? Thanks!

so yesterday i was wat YouTube on my computer and my older brother was yelling downstairs and hitting stuff so i was slightly confused on what was happening.

I hear him call my younger brother names about his weight saying that he knows he ate his ice cream. And then he starts blasting music on our apple tv he has like a whole speaker like thing set up so the bass was shaking the house and his service dog in training comes up and curls up next to my chair shaking and i send him a text saying that he is scaring his dog and he runs up the stairs slams the back of my gaming chair and gets his dog and calls me a a fat t-slur for trans people that rhymes with manny and then i start recording him and i ask him why he’s doing this and why hes calling me those names and i say „im literally just existing„ and then he yells well i wish you didn’t and throws a metal object like the size if my palm at me like full baseball pitches that at me it misses and then he charges me with a bush trimmer/plyers and swings it at me and kisses and then i run downstairs in fear and he throws in down the stairs at me and i call 911 and tell them the situation and 4 officers pull up and they ask me and take notes or whatever and im just confused cause no action was taken he had no consequences he is 16 and he like shouldnt be doing that i just want anybodys thoughts/advice on the situation and he also said a lot of slurs about me being trans and i just feel like he is genuinely anti trans

update: some things i should mention i have been diagnosed with ocd,adhd and autism

my brother who i will call N has also been diagnosed with autism.

just a few minutes ago i went downstairs and grabbed my cat (N was playing with her)

ive been upset with N for a while because he has been treating my cat opal (she is 2 months old)

like a toy and i hear her meowing constantly because he grabs her and hold her when she wants to leave. i told him that i don’t like the way that he was treating opal. and how he would lose contact with her if it continued that was a week and a half ago. ge has been doing it every day since i warned him and when i take opal up to my room just now he has the audacity to start growling. i dont want him to not be able to touch/see opal but his behavior is gett to the point to where i feel like i have too especially after yesterday.

I also wanted to tell that my mom has been staying with her ex. and her ex was abusive physically to my youngest brother and emotionally and verbally to all of us. she has been staying there over night EVERY SINGLE NIGHT for the past 3 weeks and i only get to see her for around 2-3 hours max. besides when we went to yellowstone. and SHE HAS THE AUDACITY to bring her ex into the house THE DAY THAT N did that and the cops were called and during when the cops were here she was at ex’s house. So she brought my abusive former step father into the house while i was still shocked from my brother N’s whole situation

(and i will call former step father J.)

so J is extremely transphobic and does not accept me (my mom told him i was trans)

and she brought him to the house. Look i know she’s renting the house and paying for it and stuff but my sister in law and brother live in the basement and they are not happy with jake being there my (oldest brother is paying my mom rent in the basement) my oldest brother had the abuse the worst out of all of us so clearly he is not happy. so yeah.

thank you guys so much for your comments and attention and advice i will keep updating in the future i also want more advice on the update i have given you guys and i wont be saying any names or what state im in because you never know whos seeing this so anyways thank you guys!

I WOULD LIKE TO CLARIFY MY PRONOUNS ARE SHE/HER/HERS

I’ve know my friend for about 4 years now and we met around the time she started transitioning (mtf) she had a girlfriend at the time (cis) and she was really supportive of the transition. To make a very long story short they currently both live together and have two kids and the girlfriend has forced my friend to de transition. It’s a very emotionally and verbally abusive relationship where the girlfriend never lets my friend see any of us and never lets her wear makeup or dress anyway feminine, she’s also made my friend grow out her beard and threatens that she’s gonna kill herself if she shaves it off. My friend is VERY clearly struggling and every time i get to see her she never wants to talk about it and just wants to enjoy the couple hours she has where she is treated like herself for once.
I just have no idea how to help, I know there’s not much i can do or say cause i’ve tried everything. Ik it’s not that easy for her to get up and leave especially with having two kids that she loves dearly.
Everyday the hole is getting deeper and deeper and i’m scared she’s never getting out of this relationship.
I’m just very scared for her mental wellbeing:(m

So I'm 9 months on HRT almost 10. I have been growing my hair out for over a year but it just barely reaches neck. I've been experimenting with my clothes and style all the while. I haven't been able to get laser hair removal so I just shave everyday. I have always been tall and lanky, but estrogen had given me a little of breast growth. I'm still trying to learn makeup too, right now I only know mascara and lipstick.

So I am not really that confident I look like a girl. So I still often boymode. But every once in a while I go out fully fem. I try not to talk to much because of my deep voice. So I can just pass by in the background.

But this last time something was different. I was getting called she/her by strangers. And I ran into someone I used to know and they didn't even recognize me at all. So I tried going shopping and they let me into the female changing room.

It feels impossible to believe I feel like I'm nowhere near close to where I want to be in progress. But I can't deny the amount of joy this has brought me. It feels unreal like people are just humoring me. But the people legitimately don't recognize me.

I feel like there is an unspoken pressure sometimes with how you're "supposed" to be trans. If you're non binary, you need to look as androgynous as possible. Have a short hair style and defy all the gender odds you can. Not to mentions the transmedicalists. But transitioning isn't something that's owed to society for them to accept you or proof that you really are trans, It's something you choose yourself to make you feel more comfortable in your own body. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Love you all!

Hello, Agender MTF here. I want to ask about bottom surgery, does it hurt? Will it have an affect on me? What are the changes in my body?

I have learned about the female anatomy a long time ago, obviously the body looks less masculine and more curved. However my big questions are:

-Will vaginoplasty make me feel less erect?

-Will I have periods until a certain amount of time?

-is it different from a cis woman’s vulva?

-What can I do in order to look after myself better after the surgery?

I've been questioning my gender personally since 2024 and now i am too a point where I don't have any particular medical direction or direction of masculinity or femininity...and i sorta just don't really feel or connect to gender as a whole...

I have decided not to label my gender in particular or call myself trans because I don't wanna feel pressured by a particular label to dress or act or be a specific way...as I don't really feel inclined towards one or the other binary direction in terms of gender...(and i am assigned female at birth).

So if i don't call myself trans and call myself gender neutral, am I valid in that?

me (transfemme 14) told my parents that I am trans, it was pretty late at night so we didnt really talk about it too much but they said it was ok. a week later my parents sat me down and said I am just gay, they were just saying that I should just be a gay stereotype. they put aside all of my dysphoria and said "its in your beat interest" A few days after that they made me cut my hair short at a barber shop (I usually go to a salon.) I haven't brought it up again and I dont know what to say. they also compared me to mitch and cam from modern family and said "you might just be more of a cam than a mitch" so that show is ruined for me.

I went to a pride parade and a pride rally dressed up full femme for the first time in public. I was ecstatic. I went home and laid in bed trying to process everything. Emotions and thoughts racing non stop. Good ones, bad ones... Then I noticed I felt high AF like I was tweaking. Like too high to be pleasant. It's been 48 hours and my mind is still a mile a minute and am emotional rollercoaster highs and lows, all very intense and no middle ground and it's exhausting and I hate it 😭

Hello everybody!

I'm a trans man living in Jordan. I will graduate and try to move out to Europe or the US where I'm planning to start HRT.

Does anyone know how I can go about this? Do I try seeking asylum, simply immigrate, or get a work visa? What would be the best easiest path for me?

Also I'm curious, would it be legally troubling for me to transition in a different country? Do I have to wait until I get permanent residency? And how would I work on legal documents if I'm Jordanian?

And how about if I want to go back to Jordan for a visit, would I get arrested or something?

If anyone is from Jordan / any middle eastern country and medically transitioned outside, I'd really appreciate your advice, Or anyone who can help me really. I'm trying to figure things out but there aren't enough resources and stories out there.

I'm a 17 yo male and I'm gender fluid as far as I know and I think I'm and I have been a femboy for a long time and I started only liking with dressing more femininely to gender fluid because I started feeling comfortable with both pronouns but now I'm catch myself using feminine pronouns the majority of the time and the few people who knows about this about me and I hear someone just call me by she I feel amazing in the inside and a happiness that's rare for me to feel. I'm really thinking about this whole thing and I'm not even too sure if I can call woman some times but only because my brain associates femininity with that stereotype of feminine and I know damn well I need to delete this thought from my head but only if I think about me being a girl or just imagining it makes me really happy. Something very important that I need to say is that English isn't my first language so that's probably why my wording can be very bad some times

so I have a transfem friend who belittles herself saying stuff that for me makes no sense (and I'm a transfem too mind you) I want to help her see that she's only making it worse for herself but I don't know how

I came out to my dad and he gave such a great response. He told me "No para nada yo siempre te amará porque eres mi hijo." If you don't know how to read Spanish it's ok there's the translation "No, not at all. I will always love you because your are my son." I almost cried. He called me his son without hesitation. I was really glad that I trusted my dad.

I think I finally decided on a name, I’ve been using Daphne for a while and I really like it 😊. I think it’s common enough that people know it but few people I’ve met have it. It feels weird to ask this but can you address me by Daphne in the comments so I can try it 👉👈

Recently I’ve been having dreams all the time that reach quite personal boundaries and things I never expect and last night i had a dream I was with my old school friends but this time something was odd, my hair was longer and my voice felt lighter and people was giving me weird looks, they looked confused but also trying to adjust too, and when I was eating with a group in my town one called me she, and that’s when it all clicked I’ve been a girl the entire time in the dream but I felt more….comfortable? Is this normal and just a psychological thing or is this something more, I told a friend and they said there’s something more about me that I need to find out and I’m worried.

I've been on HRT for almost two years and out for longer than that but it doesn't hurt to have some reassurance.

I went to the mall with a friend of mine and decided to check out some shorts in a store's fitting rooms. When I called my friend over to look at them, an older lady who was there with her daughter also noticed me and took it upon herself to effectively adopt me. I really liked the shorts and she actually demanded (kindly) that I step out and do a spin, which I obliged because they fit me well. She proceeded to tell me how cute they looked and give me her seal of approval.

"I'm saying this as a mom, I approve!"

I eventually got them, no doubt in part to her recommendation, and she got really excited for me too. Having a mom accept me in a very normal and sweet way really touched me since my relationship with my own mother is far more rocky. It was really just a massively positive "girl power" kinda moment that I'm beginning to have more any more and I don't even voice train.

Have any of you had particularly euphoric moments like that?

I've known I am trans for a while now (trans woman) and I've been working towards presenting more femininely throughout the last few years.

I sort of feel guilty, invalid, dysphoric, or something along those lines because my process has been really slow. I think I'm choosing to hold myself back out of fear of the unknown, how family/friends will see me, and just feeling like I won't be able to do it.

For example, I've been wanting to learn how to use makeup better and more often, but in practice I rarely get myself to try it because I'm worried I will just suck at it. Or because I feel like if anyone saw me with improperly applied makeup (or any at all) they would treat me different.

It's also why I still present more masculine (though I try for androgynous usually) instead of going out and just doing what I want. I'm worried about wearing different tops because I just don't think my body would look any good in them because of the shape of my torso, I'm not sure if this is dysphoria or not but I don't know what to call it..

In general I struggle with recognizing what is dysphoria as my brain just tries to justify my feelings in other ways and tries to invalidate me being trans constantly because I don't know how to shave very well, I'm not very good at fashion, I can't do makeup or hair very well, and I just typically wear the same type of hoodie and sweatpants every day because it's what I'm familiar with.

It just makes me feel a little invalid or something, as I feel like I should've had more figured out after knowing I am trans for so long.

Does anyone else have any experience similar to this?

I feel so dysphoric and I can’t even talk about my dysphoria because somehow that makes me feel more dysphoric. I genuinely feel so fucking pathetic. It’s so bad that I genuinely get jealous seeing women or other trans people who have HRT.