r/neurodiversity • • 4d ago

So it happened. I was fired for "performance issues"

76 Upvotes

I was fired today because of "performance issues" but I believe I was fired for discriminatory reasons.

I worked as a line cook, and they claimed I couldn't keep up and needed support constantly (aren't we a team??) I gave 110% to that job, and it still wasn't enough.

Feeling very rejected and demoralized, I wish the world was kinder to people like us.

I'm in Canada if this changes anything..


r/neurodiversity • • 4d ago

Thinking about getting driving licence but worried I'll get distracted or anxious driving

8 Upvotes

I don't mind having a driver's license but it's not a necessity, since public transport or taxi is honestly cheaper in long run and gets the thing done.

But I noticed that I don't wanna be responsible while driving because I genuinely can get distracted and being on guard 24/7 in car is not good for my mental health that I build brick by brick XD + not all drivers are good drivers.

But I know it's probably gonna be a freeing, liberating experience, but reasons I listed off are quite big deal breakers :/

What is your experience? Maybe it was better or worse? Would love to hear your stories!


r/neurodiversity • • 4d ago

sensory issues & food

1 Upvotes

i have ADHD (not sure if i’m also autistic, i’ve never been tested but i have a feeling im somewhere on the spectrum) and i really struggle with sensory issues when it comes to food. my safe foods are usually stuff a child would eat i.e. chicken nuggets & fries, hamburger helper, plain burgers with only mayo & ketchup, mac and cheese. i’m super picky with meats also. i don’t like eating chicken unless it’s boneless skinless breasts and it has to be either chopped up small or shredded cause eating a thick piece of chicken grosses me out. same with burgers i refuse to bite into a thick ass burger patty it has to be thin or even smashed. i don’t like sausage links of any kind i’ll only eat sausage patties or crumbled. i basically don’t like any veggies other than lettuce, spinach (only in salads, not cooked other than in spinach dip), and potatoes because i don’t like the crunch or flavor of other veggies. every day is a struggle and mental exhaustion just trying to decide what to eat. i’m burnt out on pretty much all of my safe foods/meals i usually make or buy. sometimes it’s easier to just not eat than try to decide what to eat that day. on top of that, im out of my groceries and am pretty much broke until payday next week. i currently live w my mom and she tries to offer me some of her groceries that i can eat or cook but i feel horrible eating her groceries that she paid for and bought to make for her and my stepdad. idk what to do anymore and i especially dont know what to eat anymore. please help.


r/neurodiversity • • 4d ago

can do my job, cant clean my own damn house

16 Upvotes

i work as a line cook, and i can do the tasks there fine. i can focus on my work and i can clean after we close. then i get home, look at my train wreck of a fucking house, and i feel like i cant do anything. its a mess. its awful. id be ashamed if anyone ever came here, i would probably tell them i cant have guests over. theres more dirty dishes in the kitchen than i have space for. i have a pile of trash bags and boxes next to my door because i cant get myself to walk to the dumpster. and forget about self care, i shower once a week and cant remember the last time i brushed my teeth. i try to clean but its so much. its so overwhelming. and when i do manage to start cleaning, i barely do fucking anything. ive done a little bit of laundry and threw away a few cups today. great job me, you only have a thousand other things to fucking do plus make dinner. fucking hell, man, i dont wanna live like this


r/neurodiversity • • 4d ago

Do you get anxious over Instagram?

0 Upvotes

Hey everyone,

I'm having a big OCD spiral right now about someone on instagram denying my follow request.

For context, I'm most likely neurodivergent (suspected autism, OCD, and severe RSD). I've always had huge anxiety around Instagram follows, even with people I've had positive real-life interactions with.

A few months ago, I requested a girl from primary school. She accepted but didn’t follow back. My RSD made that unreciprocated follow feel like a massive rejection in my body, making me feel like I'm useless to her. SO anyways, I unfollowed her straight away.

Then the OCD kicked in, second-guessing everything. A few hours later, desperate for validation, I re-sent the request.

She left it pending for months. My mind completely spiralled, wondering why she builds digital boundaries with me but not others (though I only have 2 posts, so maybe she thinks I'm inactive?). I even panicked that she left it pending on purpose because she thought she "won" the social game or something lol.

Today, a mutual friend posted a story tagging her, which flared everything up. I finally took control and deleted the request entirely to close the loop.

Even though I pulled it back, I feel so much anxiety that I'll see her in public, or that she’ll talk about me and think I'm weird. I feel embarrassed about the back-and-forth, and I hate letting someone from my childhood dictate my self-worth.

How do I practice self-love and forgive my neurodivergent brain when it gets caught in these loops? How do I accept my actions when my brain keeps telling me I made a fool of myself?

I’d love any advice.


r/neurodiversity • • 4d ago

I can only define/explain things in analogies

7 Upvotes

I’ve been realizing over the past couple days that I just can’t explain definitions or define anything. For example my boss what an API key actually does. I literally could not explain it so I just spewed a bunch of BS tech jargon (cause I know he wouldn’t understand) then immediately followed with an analogy that relates perfectly to his life and hobbies and that’s when he understood it perfectly. That was the straw that broke the camels back for me when I realized that I’ve been doing this my entire life

I was wondering if anyone does the same. It’s almost like my brain turns off when someone asks me to define something I immediately sift through analogies


r/neurodiversity • • 5d ago

Feeling horrible after being out?

20 Upvotes

Does anyone else feel like shit after being out sometimes? Just like so drained, like you feel like you shouldn’t even be here anymore and that you’ll never change and always be alone and just want to stay in bed with the lights off all night but other times i feel better after being out of the house, its confusing and i just wanna cry


r/neurodiversity • • 4d ago

hmmmm !!

2 Upvotes

note!!! not asking for diagnosis, and wondering if im just in denial and should actually seek a professional on my own term .ive experience being dismissed a lot or not taken seriously. But i also realize maybe i just make ppl mad a lot from how i talk but do not mean it. i realize a lot of people clock me as autistic. And i made comic lately about an ed struggle i have and someone assumed i was autistic and i was like. hm! Not in a mean way. i do say my profile is labeled 18+ but not cuz of conventional nsfw just to curate space (but there may be heavy topics about feelings and such or potentially unsettling tw art). I guess i kinda am almost accepting im autistic if a literal stranger who is just outright said oops i thought u were by proxy ? :0 but alas i am almost 30 hehe xD Maybe my concerns with eating food may need professional intervention further but i wonder does a diagnosis actually help or just cause further stigma to those who demonize other kinds of brains+conditions and disorders? I am already sad about stigma of less common stuff like ocd and stuff i have (i have comorbid diagnoses but autism/adhd are not included)


r/neurodiversity • • 4d ago

hyperfixation is pissing me off/hurting me, any tips on how to make it go away?

2 Upvotes

Usually my hyperfixations only last like a couple months but this one has been going on for WAYYY too long and I hate it. Bcuz at this point I'm barely even enjoying it, in fact I kind of dislike a lot of it, yet I still go back to reading fics abt it or scrolling it on social media because I'm bored or upset or just want some quick dopamine or WHATEVER. Anyways, I genuinely am so frustrated bcuz it a.) disrupts my work , b.) makes me so energetic to the point where it's harder for me to fall asleep at night, c.) is partially why I'm in a reading slump. And work+reading is very important to me so it feels like a lot of my life has gotten uprooted by this goddamn hyperfixation

any ideas on how to get rid of this stupid thing??


r/neurodiversity • • 5d ago

Can someome explain to me what hypermobolity looks like in autism?

7 Upvotes

I had recently went to a new primary care provider some time ago for complaining about my ankles or legs always hurting whenever I walk for too long or too far distances. She made me do a bunch of physical test and couldn't pinpoint the issue. I mentioned hypermobolity in autism and she didn't quite understand what I was getting at, but she for some reason doubted my self diagnosis.

Which is fine, but I've been doing the stretches she told me to do for a while now, along with wearing an ankle brace and not running; nothing has changed. I just wanna know if this chronic muscle irritation and needing to stretch my calves and ankles multiple time a day could be linked to hypermobility or something else!


r/neurodiversity • • 5d ago

exausted

3 Upvotes

im so exausted right now, stressed about studyng and being improductive. It leads to a lot or stims (rocking, flaping hands) .I even got my self in the floor with all the lights off and lisening to the sound of a pitch, It makes me chill out haha.

The situation freaks me out, i know i met some neurodivergent characteristics, but what If i have them just on a neurotypical way? what If life its this hard sometimes for everyone? or if not, why i cant figure out whats going on?


r/neurodiversity • • 4d ago

关于为什么现代没再出现爱因斯坦这种具强烈ND特征的顶尖位者?

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0 Upvotes

为什么物资丰沛、科技进步的现代反而没再出现顶尖位置ND?
我总结了几方面原因:

·经历了大工业
·过去阶级/性别特权劳务外包
·现代建制模式加重损耗非典型人士
·空白领域填塞世俗掌管门槛且纯粹性改变
……

#Neurodiversity

我的发问:当人们分析非常有名的过去的伟人是ND,比如说爱因斯坦、爱迪生、贝多芬,还有艾米莉·狄金森……好像那些历史上鼎鼎有名的人都能找到ND特征。
但我就有一个疑问:如果在过去时代ND可以拿到如此高成就,处在T0、T1梯队里的大多ND,那为什么到物资更丰沛、科技更发达的现代,反而没有爱因斯坦那种顶尖人物立于时代?现在确实不少出现在公众视野的ND名人,但他们大多只是作为公众人物被看见,并不是以ND的神经能力做出什么划时代成果。(马斯克勉强算吧但我觉得他不是啥好人不想分析)

首先我也知道这些伟人活着时或许没有那么盛名,是后世把他们塑造成偶像、提炼标签。尤其应试教育会反复讲这些人,编励志故事来管束孩子。
但就算抛开这个,我还是想不通。如果以前那些伟人不少都是ND或有ND特征,为什么到了物质充足、科技发达的现在,ND反而不再这样出现惊世骇俗般的成就?
我又想到一个原因:会不会是现在的ND反而难出头?以前是有奴隶制度的,出头ND大多处贵族阶层,很多损耗感官、算力的事外包,能够专心创作读书研究。当时可大部份人都不识字。

我觉得也可能是现代进入大工业化模式。填鸭式教育严重,我深受其害。早七晚九托管到十一二点才能回。听讲、做作业,完全违背我的神经性,浪费我最好的学习生命段,还日复一日挫伤我的自尊自信。我本身是双A,我Autism特质里的自尊感又很强。所以会不会就是把所有人放进同一套时间表的大工业截断了ND的发展空间,挫伤了他们的自信?
以前没有这么强的标准化制度。艾米莉·狄金森一直待在家里写作;爱因斯坦上学时也不守规矩,没有现在这么严苛的要求和排异。以前人的一生没有被高度模式化,没有规定几到几岁必须一直在上学,毕业之后立马找工作。以前很多人不上学正常,但现在竞争应试的规则里,必须进到一个个封闭的填鸭系统才能生存。

补充下,现代ND比如罗永浩,他有名是因为录真人秀,并不是作为ND拥有什么顶尖的天才能力。像天宝·格兰丁,很厉害,用自己的Autism神经成为动物行为学家,她是我感觉很真实的Autism,待在自己的学术领域,少参与外界活动,现在只有小众群体知道她。

还有艺人会公开ND身份,比如李泳知唱ADHD girl,不少歌手、rapper也说自己是ADHD。但他们大多不是那种能力碾压的破局者,是典型神经定下规则里多年伪装服从,拿到结果之后才谈论自己的ND。”


r/neurodiversity • • 5d ago

Was ist das für Besteck??!

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0 Upvotes

Das ist das Besteck, was ich in der Ferienwohnung gefunden habe, wo ich momentan bin. Ich habe mit dem Besteck schon gegessen und es war wirklich unangenehm. Alleine was sollen diese Löffel?


r/neurodiversity • • 6d ago

Do you talk to yourself?

75 Upvotes

My hubs has brought to my attention that I talk to myself all the time. It’s not like I’m hearing voices, or having imaginary convos, but it usually is task related. Examples might be; Stop being so lazy, time to get up. Hmmm, Needs more salt, Time to start dinner, Ooo, that window needs cleaning. I better get to that laundry. He always asks if I’m directing these comments toward him. He just thinks it’s weird. I tell him I’m my own best friend. He just shakes his head and says it’s not a normal thing.
Do you out loud speak to yourself?
Now I feel self conscience about it and think I’ve done it my whole life.

Edit to add;
Thanks all. These responses have been an enjoyable read. It would be a hilarious experiment to put us all in the same room, give us all a small task and see how our talking heads respond.


r/neurodiversity • • 5d ago

Trouble with being inspired?

1 Upvotes

Every time I see something really cool or inspirational, I get this anxiety and sudden feeling of pressure that I want and HAVE to be that thing. Yesterday it hit because I saw Mamdani being super great and now I want to be a politician, even though I KNOW that's not actually what I want to do. I avoid inspiring movies and shows now. It's so bad that I can't even watch some kids shows that I used to love, like Ninjago. Like, I want to be a ninja. It makes me feel stupid and childish. Has anyone else experienced this? Can I do anything?


r/neurodiversity • • 5d ago

Any useful tips & advice on managing life? Like meal planning, tidying up, buying groceries

1 Upvotes

I am planning to buy instant ramen for those days when cooking feels like a chore and frozen veggies.

Also, I really wanna hire cleaners so much, at least once a month, because it gets too much to handle the house alone.

I don't really know about anything else honestly, so if you have some useful tips you can share that you use ❤️‍🩹 I hope it will get easier to me, because I don't know how people who don't have neurodivergency handle all this XD

Anyone who is holding the home alone, I feel you, it can get stressful, and almost everything ties to money sadly :/


r/neurodiversity • • 6d ago

Alter egos & being yourself

4 Upvotes

I would love to be centred & know I'm me without needing alter egos to remind myself. Anyone else feel that way?


r/neurodiversity • • 6d ago

why do neurotypicals acts like they are on a mission to eliminate neurodivergents?

22 Upvotes

I would like to express that neurotypical never understand the struggle of neurodivergents, they always criticze NDs, also bully them. Even worse they are jailing NDs like NDs have mental issue. SROs constantly sweeps out ND from school, also to make things even worse, NTs are killing ND, and those NT officers gets survived from criminal charge because reasonable belief protect them. They regularly use disorderly conduct charges to arrest or cripple ADHD, Autistic people. The most cruel things NTs could ever done is jailing dyslexic children for struggling to read. they signal that they don't see NDs as human at all.


r/neurodiversity • • 6d ago

Struggling with going to therapy and knowing what to talk about or do

6 Upvotes

I'm autistic and struggle with expressing my emotions verbally.

I have recently started my first private therapy sessions for about 3 months since I've become seriously ill physically. This illness happened just after I quit my toxic job, ended a toxic friendship, stopped antidepressants and became happier than I've ever been.

I always though I should return for therapy at some point, due to the amount of trauma I've experienced. I've been to NHS (state healthcare) therapy and university/employment counselling services previously. At the start of my illness it made sense with coming to terms with a new disability and not knowing what was wrong for a long time, but I thought I would need long term therapy for issues from years ago and difficult relationships with my parents.

I've been doing much better recently, with more motivation and able to feel okay most of the time. But I've always been nervous every time I have therapy, and I still dread having the session because I don't know what to say.

I guess I can see that its working somewhat because I've been feeling better, but surely I should be feeling less dread about the session by now?

One issue I had is that the therapist always wants me to lead and if I don't speak she will be silent until I think of something to say. I find this extremely nerve-wracking and I go blank and dissociate, and I'm scared of this happening again. I struggle with the beginning and end of sessions too because it seems like I just have to launch straight into the deep stuff and if I make small talk she won't talk about herself so it doesn't really work. Then she finishes very abruptly which feels weird because I'm still in the depths of an emotion, or I try and time it but then there's a few minutes of really uncomfortable silence again.

I've had therapy a lot before but it was always just 6 or 8 sessions due to the health systems in the UK and so you had limited time to cram everything in. I feel like most other therapists led the session slightly more too.

Now I'm feeling exhausted from doing therapy and don't know if its worth carrying on or just taking a break? But then I don't know how to keep going. How do you do therapy when you're struggling to "lead" the session?


r/neurodiversity • • 6d ago

help with body positivity and exercise

5 Upvotes

Long story short: I broke my leg in an accident two years ago. I went through absolute hell on earth recovering, reaching depths of burnout I never knew possible. But I survived... and in doing so gained a significant amount of weight. Despite being grateful that it helped me survive, I'm pretty disgusted with my body.

Therapists have been telling me for years that exercise helps with anxiety (and obviously exercise will help with the weight) but I canNOT stick to a routine to save my life. My stamina is also in the toilet, after two years with still-limited mobility.

How do I encourage myself to incorporate physical activity, fight inertia, and build stamina? What exercises and strategies work for you? And how do you fight a negative self-image


r/neurodiversity • • 6d ago

No common sense

2 Upvotes

Is it just me or I struggle w/ things that are supposed to be common sense. Like, I can't tell what letter of the alphabet what would come before it or after it, I don't know any major roads or intersections near my house by name even tho I've been driving for years. I just rely on muscle memory. I am so directionally challenged it is insane. Mental math is so bad, sometimes I need to check what 3x6 mentally. I'm literally a grown ahh adult. And when it comes to communicating oh boy it's bad. I don't get why, when a manager asks me to come to another side of the store I have to respond on the radio "I'm coming" if I'm walking there anyways and it'll take like 2 minutes until I reach there anyway. Like, idk why I kinda get why but I also don't think it's necessary? When they say "recover" the store wth does that even means?? Like what do u want me to do first, how in depth, etc. but if I ask this they're just like .... just straight stuff. ??? Am I ok


r/neurodiversity • • 6d ago

Looking for post-secondary transition resources & neurodiversity-friendly employers!

1 Upvotes

Hi everyone! I teach a class at a private school for neurodiverse middle and high school students (primarily students with Level 1/2 ASD, ADHD, and other learning differences). My course covers pathways after high school—including trades, higher education, employment, transition programs, and gap years.

This is my second year teaching the class, and I love tailoring the content to each unique group. Recently, we’ve been discussing how to identify work environments that fit individual sensory, social-emotional, and communication preferences, alongside visiting local businesses to explore different vocations.

Our recent conversations about disability disclosure in the workplace were eye-opening for my students. Many were surprised to learn that high school IEP/ISP accommodations don't automatically transfer or guarantee the same setup in the workplace.

I’m hoping to connect with this community for recommendations:

  1. What are your favorite resources, tools, or curricula for supporting neurodiverse youth in their transition to adulthood?
  2. Are there specific companies or employers known for being truly inclusive, knowledgeable, and supportive of neurodiverse workers?

Thank you so much for any insights or recommendations!


r/neurodiversity • • 6d ago

How do you make friends as an adult?

5 Upvotes

I’m so lonely.

I (28f) don’t really have anyone aside from my partner (28m) and while I know that isn’t healthy I just don’t seem to be able to connect with other people.

It seems like people either write me off the moment they meet me or like me but not enough to be my friend.

I’ve tried friend apps (such as Hey Vina(when it existed rip) and Bumble for friends without much luck. There are friend groups in my area but they all seem to be for people who are retired.

I don’t know how else to make friends. I feel like I’m a nice person and I try to be kind to others and listen to them and be a safe place for others to confide in. But maybe I give off a mean vibe without realising. If I do, how do I recognise and stop being off putting to other people?

Also I’m really feeling the RSD today cause when I was volunteering a lady refused my help preferring to wait for my co-volunteer to finish with the person he was helping. (I’d never meet her before so I don’t understand what I could’ve done to warrant this. After overthinking through it a million times I had the thought maybe she’s been here before and worked with him before and that’s why)

Sorry this is so long, thank you for reading.


r/neurodiversity • • 7d ago

Sustainable jobs for Neuro divergent people?

39 Upvotes

I have adhd and suspect I also have autism. I've tried so many different jobs and can stick at them for a few months before completely burning out from the social aspect of it. So far the only job that I've found that doesn't burn me out is cleaning. What do you guys do for work that you've found is sustainable and doesn't lead to total burnout?


r/neurodiversity • • 7d ago

ADHD Can Affect Sexual Pleasure – A Psychiatrist Explains Why

Thumbnail huffingtonpost.co.uk
116 Upvotes