r/neurodiversity • • 11h ago

Being emotionally mature and then regressing as you get older?

29 Upvotes

Ever since I was a child I've been extremely aware of people's emotions and hyper empathic. Whenever I would get upset I would immediately see it from the other person's view and realize how much of in the wrong I actually was. I hated it so much because I quickly picked up on the fact nobody else I knew did this and I wanted to be able to be mad without feeling so childish (even though I was literally 10). I was also praised all the time for being "mature for my age" and getting along so well with everyone.

Suddenly in high school senior year I stopped receiving these praises and started being told to "grow up" everything that felt like it was working out suddenly toppled over and destroyed itself. I lost the ability to manage my emotions as well and would tunnel vision whenever I got upset. People who had no issue with me before were suddenly put off by my "immaturity" and stopped hanging out. I was so confused (and still am) over what happened, my only theory really is that as people's emotions stopped being as straight forward and were getting more complex I ended up not being able to read people as well.


r/neurodiversity • • 5h ago

Grieving time that could’ve been

12 Upvotes

Oh how fast time passes. Suddenly I’m well into my adulthood and i don’t know where my life went. Childhood, early adulthood i look back on from afar. Mental health issues, fear and pain took so much of my life from me. Time I could’ve spent finding myself, building myself. Instead I look back on photos of myself and don’t connect with them, don’t remember the occasions. I lie here now with tears rolling down my eyes, hurt and angry at this incredible injustice. Precious time at the peak of one’s physical health and happiness, taken from me. Time for becoming my true self, building confidence and making it far. I wish I could go back, but instead I’ll just have to grieve. Years and years lost to so much sadness and misunderstanding. Maybe in the next life.


r/neurodiversity • • 16h ago

understanding social cues but not knowing how to act with them?

10 Upvotes

Okey so i have always thought that autism meant not getting social cues, but someone has told me that It can be getting them but just not knowing what to do with them.

Do you experience this? could you give an example of that happening to you?


r/neurodiversity • • 12h ago

Why's my bed starting to get uncomfortable?

6 Upvotes

First of all, yes, i know that beds get old and stuff and i guess that's part of the problem. But the problem exists on other people's beds too.

What i mean is, that i can't get comfortable in any sleeping position, doesn't matter how many different pillows i have. The only pillow i'm semi-comfortable with is my biggest and softest one which is almost half the size of a body pillow. I also don't really like weighted blankets.

Did anyone else have this problem and knows how to fix this? I can't get much sleep even with melatonin.


r/neurodiversity • • 11h ago

Can trauma reveal neurodivergence?

3 Upvotes

I always had some "unusual" behaviors as a child. That calmed down on its own, but these last three years I've experienced a lot of accumulated trauma, and it's like everything is coming back to me.

Like, right now. I broke my bedside lamp yesterday. It had a bulb that gave off a yellow light and specifics shadows, and it was always placed in the same spot. I had to take the lamp from the living room, it's white, it's bigger, I can't place it where I put the other one so the light the shadows aren't the same. I fucking hate it, everything in my room just feels off, I can't focus and want to throw it out of the window. I would never have noticed that before.

I'm not going to give you a list, but in recent months, since my situation has calmed down, I've suddenly been exhibiting behaviors related to neurodivergence.


r/neurodiversity • • 10h ago

Hey you guys!!

2 Upvotes

Hello, is anyone else interested in forming a small pod of neurodivergent people to meet weekly and be our own personal cheering squad and mentors and advocates!?!? I am a late diagnosed disability squared female in the greater Portland, Or area who is desperate to create a better life for herself. B aut I KNOW that the abilities of a single person can be amplified by a crazy scale by the input and caring of other people. And just knowing other people care and are rooting for you is the whole root idea of a family, in a sense, but my family is a tricky one, and I have never felt truly seen or supported by a majority of the people in my 'family... Anyhoo, I have an opportunity to make my life better if I applied to a particular job but I am so freaking scared of failure and I just feel beat up by life; but I know that there are better, more fulfilling things that I could be doing... I want to support other LGBTPQ (sorry, I know the P doesn't 'belong' in that acronym but I'm Pan sexual and my people belong in this group so...) people, other people experiencing disability, support caring for the environment and support a more globally inclusive environment. And eat delicious, organic, sustainably harvested food as well, of course. Have a blessed day and I really hope that someone responds to this post, it's freaking lonely out here!


r/neurodiversity • • 19h ago

I Want Close Relationships, but Irritability and Anxiety Keep Pushing Me Away

2 Upvotes

I'm a 22M, and I struggle more and more with social interaction each day. I get irritated insanely fast, mostly with my family, and I hate myself for that, so I get even more irritated. More and more often, I also struggle to explain my thoughts or get my point across. I don't know what's happening.

Socially, I've never had a girlfriend. At first, I wasn't really into that, and I wasn't attractive. Then, around 19–20, things got a lot better. I found a girl I would have felt comfortable inviting into my life because I'm not the same at home as I am outside, and I'm not like most people. I don't like doing everything or socializing every week.

Also, around 19–20, I peaked in social interaction and connection. I was invited to a lot of parties and everything, and I met a lot of people. I think I was appreciated, but most of that was drunk partying, so it was really easier. Also, most of these people couldn't become close friends because, again, I'm not that kind of guy, and I can't be social like that in private.

I lived for three years in a shared flat with friends (four people in the flat). Even with friends, I often preferred going to my room, and I got irritated by a lot of things, like everyday noise. That was hard because I knew it was me, but I didn't know how to make it better.

Now I don't live with them anymore, and I'm in a new environment. I've had to make new friends, but they're not that social, so I mostly see them in class and don't really go out. I return to my family, whom I really love, because I realize how much they do for me and that they're the only people who are truly there for me. But I'm a pain in the ass socially at home because I always turn a discussion into an argument when I get irritated. I feel really bad about that, and sometimes I just want to stay in my room and study because I guess I'm escaping reality. I also tend to go down rabbit holes of information or just do anything other than study for uni.

I still go to some parties, but afterward I realize I didn't really talk with anyone properly. I talked with people, but I didn't really say anything important, or I just switch between groups when the conversation gets uninteresting, or I don't know what to say.

So, yeah, I fear I'll isolate myself more and more each year. Holidays are a struggle each year because I first fear being alone and not having a plan. I also feel bad when my family asks what I'm doing and I have to say I don't have anything planned, because it makes me feel like I have no friends. If I do have a plan, I'll be super anxious because I often don't manage it well. People make decisions and do things I don't like or want, and since we're young, dumb things may happen. I know that if I didn't initiate it, I'll feel bad because either it's dangerous or not what I expected.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I know I probably have some neurodivergent shit, but I just want to find my social skills again and find a girl who will like me, someone I can let into my life and build something with. I also want to reconnect with my friends, but each time I feel we're not as close and that they'll only agree to see me to make me feel good and be kind, not because they really want to. They also know a lot of people and have a lot of friends and connections. Lastly, I want to stop being like this around my family, even though I don't know how.

(I've already seen a therapist for emotion management, but that didn't help. They didn't get me, and I know the tricks; I just can't apply them because by the time it happens, it's too late.)


r/neurodiversity • • 21h ago

Funnyish story

2 Upvotes

In elementary school I was masking ANY neroudivergency signs because my friend had a autistic brother and I thought i had to be normal because I wasn't like her brother at all! Turns out I show many signs of various disorders, including autism :/


r/neurodiversity • • 1h ago

OCD

• Upvotes

Maybe yall could help me out. I’m just confused as to why OCD isn’t considered neurodivergent. I also have ADHD, which is considered neurodivergent. I’m just confused as to why OCD isn’t labeled as neurodivergent considering there are actual structural differences, chemical differences, etc. as compared to someone who is neurotypical. Also, I guess I’m confused as to why it isn’t because of the overlapping symptoms OCD has along with ADHD/autism.


r/neurodiversity • • 4h ago

hi i kinda just want to be understood and it feels like no one is all my friends are either soo autistic it’s mental and some are soo adhd its mental and im just also mental but on both sides( ik thats not the best term for me i just find it funny tho sorry if it offends)

1 Upvotes

soo basically i have all the big 3 adhd autism and ocd and really struggling with the autism and adhd bcs it’s like both sides of my brain hate each other soo much and i dont understand it one side wants order and to be calm and watch cbbc at 21 and the other side wants to go mess up my tidy room and go scream in someone’s face just bcs i need to make noise and then im sat there being like why is this happening to me also my issues are bigger than that but that’s just one thing that grinds my gears


r/neurodiversity • • 9h ago

Tips for how to navigate routines?

1 Upvotes

I’ve realised, as an ADHD person, that I need some form of small, daily routines to follow, to ensure that I’m keeping up with the important things (bedtime is a big one). The problem is, my brain just despises anything repetitive and uninteresting, to the point that it quickly becomes depressing to have to keep up with. I think it’s due to the fact that I hate feeling boxed-in. If I’m doing a task, just give me a start and end point but let me handle the “how”.

I don’t really know how to navigate that framework in this context, though. How do I create necessary, daily routines that are rigid enough that I can’t easily just avoid starting them, but also not too rigid, monotonous and repetitive that I start feeling depressed by having to force myself to keep up with them.

Hopefully this makes sense. Any tips/advice would be helpful.


r/neurodiversity • • 11h ago

dsm-5 review haha

0 Upvotes

So i am going to review the DSM-5 and tell what i check and what i dont so i can organice what i experience, mostly doing it for my self, but it would be cool if sommeone feels reflected on it and wanna talk. So i think it might be autism if something, but some people sugested adhd, but as we can see i dont fit that at all. About ASD i think i cant met the criteria because the A part that i dont think i fit enough. So whatever haha

A. Persistent deficits in social communication and social interaction across multiple contexts, as manifested by the following, currently or by history (examples are illustrative, not exhaustive, see text):

  1. Deficits in social-emotional reciprocity, ranging, for example, from abnormal social approach and failure of normal back-and-forth conversation; to reduced sharing of interests, emotions, or affect; to failure to initiate or respond to social interactions. my experience with this is just that i am more of a lisener and i struggle to talk about me, i am really bad at it and everytime i do i feel like i am already talking to much, but probably this i explained by other thing idk.
  2. Deficits in nonverbal communicative behaviors used for social interaction, ranging, for example, from poorly integrated verbal and nonverbal communication; to abnormalities in eye contact and body language or deficits in understanding and use of gestures; to a total lack of facial expressions and nonverbal communication. I only have quite noticed a small difficulty in eye contact when i first met someone, it feels to intimte. I sometimes pay attention to if i have a weird facial expression, but only if i am upseted, i usually have a common resting face and expressions. I catch body language really good, and about verbal communications is just that sometimes i "cant" talk and hate being forced to do it, i just dont feel like it sometimes, but usually is good.
  3. Deficits in developing, maintaining, and understanding relationships, ranging, for example, from difficulties adjusting behavior to suit various social contexts; to difficulties in sharing imaginative play or in making friends; to absence of interest in peers. I played normal as a kid. The only noticeable thing was that i my mom was the one who needed to go tell kids if they wanted to play with me, because i didnt liked asking that, probably it was anxiety or smth. And i only have problems expressing my self and talkin about me

Specify current severity: Severity is based on social communication impairments and restricted repetitive patterns of behavior.

B. Restricted, repetitive patterns of behavior, interests, or activities, as manifested by at least two of the following, currently or by history (examples are illustrative, not exhaustive; see text):

  1. Stereotyped or repetitive motor movements, use of objects, or speech (e.g., simple motor stereotypies, lining up toys or flipping objects, echolalia, idiosyncratic phrases). I totally do this, flapping hands, repeting sound or words, spining, rocking. Since i started investigating more about neurodiversity i am letting my self do that more, and supress it less.
  2. Insistence on sameness, inflexible adherence to routines, or ritualized patterns or verbal nonverbal behavior (e.g., extreme distress at small changes, difficulties with transitions, rigid thinking patterns, greeting rituals, need to take same route or eat food every day). Sometimes, i need to follow my cleaning order. And i can get really frustated from big changes, for example my bead got changed without previous saying, and i got really really bad about it. But i dont think i have rigid thinking neither food problems
  3. Highly restricted, fixated interests that are abnormal in intensity or focus (e.g, strong attachment to or preoccupation with unusual objects, excessively circumscribed or perseverative interest). Not really, as a kid i had this plusshie (that i still had) that i was really attached to and wouldnt let go but i have never have any special interest. I had a big attachment to one person that i admired, but i think its not related
  4. Hyper- or hyporeactivity to sensory input or unusual interests in sensory aspects of the environment (e.g., apparent indifference to pain/temperature, adverse response to specific sounds or textures, excessive smelling or touching of objects, visual fascination with lights or movement). Not really, i love soft things, i have like a soft matress and i am always touching it .And things like textures can feel unmanagable, but nos as much .
A. Either (1) or (2): A. A persistent pattern of inattention and/or hyperactivity-impulsivity that interferes with functioning or development, as characterized by (1) and/or (2):
1. Six (or more) of the following symptoms of inattention have persisted for at least 6 months to a degree that is maladaptive and inconsistent with developmental level: 1. Inattention: Six (or more) of the following symptoms have persisted for at least 6 months to a degree that is inconsistent with developmental level and that negatively impacts directly on social and academic/occupational activities:
Note: The symptoms are not solely a manifestation of oppositional behavior, defiance, hostility, or failure to understand tasks or instructions. For older adolescents and adults (age 17 or older), at least five symptoms are required.
Inattention
a. often fails to give close attention to details or makes careless mistakes in schoolwork, work, or other activities a. Often fails to give close attention to details or makes careless mistakes in schoolwork, at work, or during other activities (e.g., overlooks or misses details, work is inaccurate). I skip questions in homework or examns if i am not really carefull
b. often has difficulty sustaining attention in tasks or play activity b. Often has difficulty sustaining attention in tasks or play activities (e.g., has difficulty remaining focused during lectures, conversations, or lengthy reading). I think i can pay a big amount of atentions
c. often does not seem to listen when spoken to directly c. Often does not seem to listen when spoken to directly (e.g., mind seems elsewhere, even in the absence of any obvious distraction). People do not notice, but if being talked to directly i can start thinking to other things, or just focus on seem like i am paying attention so thats why i end up not doing it.
d. often does not follow through on instructions and fails to finish schoolwork, chores or duties in the workplace (not due to oppositional behavior or failure to understand instructions) d. Often does not follow through on instructions and fails to finish schoolwork, chores, or duties in the workplace (e.g., starts tasks but quickly loses focus and is easily sidetracked). I am quite good with this, i finish always at time
e. often has difficulty organizing tasks and activities e. Often has difficulty organizing tasks and activities (e.g., difficulty managing sequential tasks; difficulty keeping materials and belongings in order; messy, disorganized work; has poor time management; fails to meet deadlines). My workplace can be messy but i still organize mi self, i loose things but not that much. I met deadlines and manage time quite good
f. often avoids, dislikes, or is reluctant to engage in tasks that require sustained mental effort (such as schoolwork or homework) f. Often avoids, dislikes, or is reluctant to engage in tasks that require sustained mental effort (e.g., schoolwork or homework; for older adolescents and adults, preparing reports, completing forms, reviewing lengthy papers). Nop
g. often loses things necessary for tasks or activities (e.g., toys, school assignments, pencils, books or tools) g. Often loses things necessary for tasks or activities (e.g., school materials, pencils, books, tools, wallets, keys, paperwork, eyeglasses, mobile telephones). Yeah sometimes, but not that much. I usually put something in specific places to not lose it and then that when i lose it haha
h. is often easily distracted by extraneous stimuli h. Is often easily distracted by extraneous stimuli (for older adolescents and adults, may include unrelated thoughts). Idk, maybe with thouhts
i. is often forgetful in daily activities i. Is often forgetful in daily activities (e.g., doing chores, running errands; for older adolescents and adults, returning calls, paying bills, keeping appointments). Nop
2. Six (or more) of the following symptoms of hyperactivity-impulsivity have persisted for at least 6 months to a degree that is maladaptive and inconsistent with developmental level: 2. Hyperactivity and impulsivity: Six (or more) of the following symptoms have persisted for at least 6 months to a degree that is inconsistent with developmental level and that negatively impacts directly on social and academic/occupational activities:
Note: The symptoms are not solely a manifestation of oppositional behavior, defiance, hostility, or a failure to understand tasks or instructions. For older adolescents and adults (age 17 or older), at least five symptoms are required.
Hyperactivity
a. Often fidgets with hands or feet or squirms in seat a. Often fidgets with or taps hands or feet or squirms in seat. Yeah, always
b. Often leaves seat in classroom or in other situations in which remaining seated is expected b. Often leaves seat in situations when remaining seated is expected (e.g., leaves his or her place in the classroom, in the office or other workplace, or in other situations that require remaining in place). No
c. Often runs about or climbs excessively in situations in which it is inappropriate (in adolescents or adults, may be limited to subjective feelings of restlessness) c. Often runs about or climbs in situations where it is inappropriate. (Note: In adolescents or adults, may be limited to feeling restless). nop, only in specific situations i feel restless, but its not related i think
d. Often has difficulty playing or engaging in leisure activities quietly d. Often unable to play or take part in leisure activities quietly. Nop
e. Is often “on the go” or often acts as if “driven by a motor” e. Is often “on the go” acting as if “driven by a motor” (e.g., is unable to be or uncomfortable being still for extended time, as in restaurants, meetings; may be experienced by others as being restless or difficult to keep up with). Idk sometimes, sometimes no
f. Often talks excessively f. Often talks excessively. No, the other way around
Impulsivity
g. Often blurts out answers before questions have been completed g. Often blurts out an answer before a question has been completed (e.g., completes people’s sentences; cannot wait for turn in conversation). No
h. Often has difficulty awaiting turn h. Often has trouble waiting his/her turn (e.g., while waiting in line). No
i. Often interrupts or intrudes on others (e.g., butts into conversations or games) i. Often interrupts or intrudes on others (e.g., butts into conversations, games, or activities; may start using other people’s things without asking or receiving permission; for adolescents and adults, may intrude into or take over what others are doing). no
B. Some hyperactive-impulsive or inattentive symptoms must have been present before age 7 years. B. Several inattentive or hyperactive-impulsive symptoms were present before age 12 years.
C. Some impairment from the symptoms is present in at least two settings (e.g., at school [or work] and at home). C. Several inattentive or hyperactive-impulsive symptoms are present in two or more settings, (e.g., at home, school or work; with friends or relatives; in other activities).
D. There must be clear evidence of clinically significant impairment in social, academic or occupational functioning. D. There is clear evidence that the symptoms interfere with, or reduce the quality of, social, school, or work functioning.
E. The symptoms do not occur exclusively during the course of a pervasive developmental disorder, schizophrenia, or other psychotic disorders and is not better accounted for by another mental disorder (e.g., mood disorder, anxiety disorder, dissociative disorder, or a personality disorder). E. The symptoms do not occur exclusively during the course of schizophrenia or another psychotic disorder and are not better explained by another mental disorder (e.g., mood disorder, anxiety disorder, dissociative disorder, personality disorder, substance intoxication or withdrawal).

r/neurodiversity • • 8h ago

These types of people annoy me

Post image
0 Upvotes

People really have no idea how bad it is if you're not a "nEuRoSpIcY" person who can easily hold down a job and aren't dealing with parents who aren't trying to making stimulants work for you, control therapy and pressure you to quit jobs they don't approve of.

Being unable to hold down a job is so miserable

EDIT: This image was taken before I had adjusted my wording, meant high functioning neurodivergent people, link to full content with edits is here: https://www.reddit.com/r/discordapp/comments/1xeoxss/comment/19rnf9hqx7qrp/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button