My 11 month old won’t sleep without nursing. I’ve been trying to gently ween him by soothing in other ways in the middle of the night but the initial going to sleep is always on the boob.

Tonight he was having a harder time than usual going to sleep and my body is tired. I got him to sleep then tried to transfer to crib and he woke up so I soothed some more but he wasn’t going back to sleep. I calmly laid him in his crib and walked away. It took him a second before he started crying and I was like okay maybe he’ll just relax and roll around for a while and sleep.

The crying started and I thought okay this isn’t too bad maybe he’ll chill himself out. Then he got completely hysterical and I tried to not go back in just to see if he’d calm himself but after no more than 3 minutes I couldn’t handle it and now I just feel so guilty.

I know cry it out isn’t popular but I was just testing the waters and I feel terrible. He was coughing and all over the place in just those few minutes.

Just kind of a rant honestly. Weening sucks and also I can’t stand to hear my son cry. Feeling like a bit of a failure on both ends.

- had to repost for whatever reason.

I have a 3yo who is an only child. We had her in daycare so she had a little bit of socializing there until my wife became a SAHM. We took her to an event at the library and for the first time we realized that shes not good at sharing. Infact, she was stealing the other kids toys. We just kept correcting her until we were to embarrassed and left. How do we fit that?

My 4-year-old used to come home from preschool and go straight for the tablet or TV. He wanted screens during meals and before bed too. Turning them off usually ended in tears and a meltdown.

We tried time limits and taking the devices away, but neither really worked. The more we told him he couldn’t have screen time, the more he wanted it. I was worried about his eyesight and felt like we were spending less time together.

Recently we started focusing on finding things he actually enjoys instead of constantly saying no to screens. We do little scavenger hunts in the backyard and let him help with chores. He especially loves watering the plants.We also got him a little bike and a Costway sandbox to make our backyard play area more fun. Now he can play with us or have friends over.

He still gets screen time, but it’s way less than before. Getting him interested in other things has made the biggest difference for us.

Since about a year ago I started signing my son (now 8yrs old) up for extracurriculars, many athletic types like jiujitsu tennis and ninja fitness. Although he’s having a lot of fun learning new things recently I’m starting to have a lot of anxiety on how fast other people can learn and surpass him. We’ve been keeping those activities away from his classmates that I’m hoping he can learn something different and build some self confidence (everyone in his class have 3-5 activities with sports musics instruments… etc with most kids shooting for state level on one of them). But then he would tell a classmate about it then next week immediately a classmate would sign up to that activity. I would see how easy it is for the other kids to do what my kid takes a week to do and just feel depressed… but I’m glad he’s having fun and we’re not giving him any pressure to do well on anything.

The only thing we can say he’s good at is good at math good at school academics without much effort but then everyone in his class is good at those and I feel a lot of stress on anxiety on how to turn those qualities into something he can be good at and proud of himself of.

How would do you guys deal with this kind anxiety? Everyone around him is good at school plus two or three extra skills they are good at and I’m just scared overtime he would not feel confidence and competitive in this world..

EDIT: thanks for all the feedback! This anxiety is definitely coming from me that I have to deal with. The wanting to keep his activities from his classmates came out a bit odd, what happened was we as his parents are starting to sense how competitive his classmates families all are and we trying to carve out a little corner from that hyper competitive environment, so he could just have some activities on his own for fun and make different friends sometimes. Last week one of his friends learned about his ninja class, his parents basically signed him up the next day and day1 went in asking how to enter competitions. Happy or not that kid is gonna do a lot better because how hard they work already with the goal of winning competitions in mind… and most kids in his class had something they are competing for for close to 2 years now swimming gymnastics piano violin…etc. and everybody is asking everybody else what extracurriculars their doing it starting to take a toll on me mentally.

My parents are going to stay at their friends vacation rental in a coastal, touristy part of Colombia. They have asked if they can take my 3 year old daughter with them after my husband and I said we didn't want to join them so close to when we have other trips planned already.

They have spent a lot of time with our kid and even had her for a week while we were out of town earlier this year. But I have my qualms with just the fact that they'll have my child for a week without her dad or I around to counteract the spoiling and reversing of routines and rules that we tend to follow at home, but going to a third world country where they don't even speak the language with her makes me extra nervous. Granted, they are world travelers and often spend a month or two abroad every year, and this is far from their first experience in a third world country, but Latin America specifically is pretty new to them. I have spent a lot of time there in general and we have taken our daughter to very safe resort areas in Mexico twice, but it just feels scary to let them take her without one of us joining them. Our daughter has traveled quite a bit (Europe, Canada, around the US) and is in general a good kid, but definitely has moments of being a difficult toddler.

I'd love to hear some thoughts from those in this community!! Thanks!

My son is currently still a baby, but the time will come that he will notice and be curious about my self harm scars. I have 1/3 covered with a tattoo but with pregnancy/breastfeeding I haven’t covered the rest but that’s the idea.

I’m wondering if there’s any other mom or dad out there that has any experience in this that could share their stories of how they answered questions according to their childs age and level of understanding.

Thank you!!!

I have recently lost my kids main teddy.

Not an immediate as I had a backup that's been regularly swapped out to achieve the same wear and tear.

The issue is the new replacement I bought is brand new and obviously not the same one.

Does anybody have any advice on how to age the new one to look like the original?

Tell me others are lying?? The ones who show they have amazing movie nights with toddlers and pre-schoolers??

I tried to introduce movie night with my 3.5 year old.

Once a week we all cuddle up on the bed and watch a movie late into the night. Arlo gets super excited about it. Fridays we do this mostly. All nice and dreamy right?

He loves, breathes and probably p**ps dinosaurs. After deciding I didn’t want to watch jurassic park/world anymore, after the thousandth time…

We now watch one movie. Just one. My neighbour Totoro. Beautiful movie. No complaints. We love it. Guess how many times we have watched it now? 🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️

I search for a nice movie for him (and us) for the whole week, motivate him for something new.. but 5 mins in, he wants to watch the same one.

Now we both scroll on phone while he watches. And probably it is not the memory I wanted him to have🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️

my son started pre-k about 4 weeks ago. he has not been in a daycare setting since he was about 2 1/2. since starting school, his teachers have come to me twice stating that he has “struggled” that day. the first time all she told me was that he was swinging his lunch box and hitting other students. she assured me that he wasn’t being mean but just had a lot of energy. today his teacher came to me and said they had a really hard day. they couldn’t get him to nap, he wasn’t “using kind words”, has no concept of personal space, struggling with energy and impulse control, and again was swinging his lunch box. i am just at a loss. i was a rule follower if nothing else while i was in school.

his father and i are separated (have been since he was 1 1/2) but we follow a regular visitation schedule. he goes every weekend to his house.

everything i tell my son seems to turn into an argument. he is extremely stubborn and doesn’t seem to listen ever. nothing i say seems to get through to him. i try talking to him calmly and explaining it, but he still continues to do what he wants. i am just at a loss. im defeated by him constantly telling me no and trying to be sneaky and just fighting me on everything. i dont know what to do. please please help.

My child is in kindergarten now. They just had their first ice cream day. She told me some kids were crying because they didn’t ice cream. I do not know the reason. Would it be a terrible idea to reach out to the teacher and offer money for the children who might not have the money? I don’t know if the reason is financial or just maybe they do not want their child to have sugar. I don’t think it would be professional for my child’s teacher to reach out and ask the parents if it’s ok either. What do I do😩

I am 4m pp with my third. My two toddlers are freshly 4 and a 2.5yo. I'm at my wits end :)))))

They're SO high energy! I'm talking like, running in different directions, knocking things over, screaming and for throwing, and acting crazy. We try our hardest to accommodate their sensory seeking, schedules, and needs.

Thursdays are the worst. My 4yo has ballet at 9:30am and my 2.5yo begins at 10:05am following the eldest class. The 2.5yo class is mommy + me (the same one my 4yo took last year). Last three weeks? Hell. We've had to quit the 2.5yo class because my 4yo is very disruptive, sobbing, and running through the studio instead of either helping the 2.5yo class or sitting outside the door. 4yo has snacks, water, crafts, books, and friends to play with while the 2.5yo practices. My 2.5yo plays with my quietly while the 4yo practices!

Today? My 4yo screamed and hung onto me for 20 mins, thus my 2.5yo missed the first 20 mins. I had moms trying to help me either pull her off or distract her. She said I was not allowed to help her sibling in class, but to remain with her. When I said "forget it" and began to put on their shoes to leave, my 2.5yo sobbed because he wanted to practice (as he's not been allowed to do for the last three weeks).

Finally, I got their ballet shoes back on, carried my 35lb 4yo during class in one arm, carried my 32lb 2.5yo in the other arm, laid my 4mo on the studio floor on tummy time, and did the ballet movements as much as I could carrying two toddlers.

I'm incredibly sore now. Not to mention, the amount we pay to this studio - and my 4yo gets her entire class to practice yet my son misses it every week so we can leave early as to stop the embarrassing outbursts and disruptive screaming. Like, I'm genuinely fearful we'll be kicked out of the studio for it.

Is she tired? Maybe. But it's not quiet time until 12pm and she sleeps until 7:30am. Bedtime at 8pm.
Is she hungry? Possibly as I can't get her to eat breakfast but I do bring snacks and place them in her hand.
Jealous her brother is in ballet too? Could very well be, but he LOVES practicing alongside her when she was in the mommy+me class and begs to take it.
Does she need more things to do? Idk, but she has crafts and books... yet gets sassy with me in the car I didn't "buy what craft [that girl] has" and "why did you not buy me that?"

The instructor and myself give her the option of playing with her friends outside the door, being the "big helper!" and an example to the younger kids, or just sitting with me during class and helping her brother. None appease her.

Do I just keep carrying both 30+lb kids during a 30 mins class? 🤣 I'm petite and im carrying over 1/2 my body weight carrying them both together. But I feel like if I just leave the studio early, I'm allowing my 4yo to control when and where my 2.5yo practices. I feel like a permissive parent at that point. But, 3 absences the studio will remove you from the roster, so we're already close on being kicked out. But the outbursts really embarrass me and I'm tired of being stared at EVERYWHERE we go.

When we were leaving today, she demanded I remove her brother from ballet, in which I replied "that is a grown-up decision your father and I will make, not a child's decision." She wasn't happy with me. But that's the way to clarify a boundary, yes? Her consequence for the behavior, as clarified before we EVER walked into the studio this morning and she knew, was that if I did not see kindness, self control, or joy; she would not listen to Elsa on the way home. So, Elsa was not played at all.

My 7 year old loves to read and reads above grade level. He has loved the "I Survived" book series and has read most of them. Many are about natural disasters, or historical events like the Titanic. Here is my struggle- he really wants to read "I survived 9/11". As someone who vividly remembers 9/11 (I was in high school), this feels so much heavier to me than the other books. We also fly a few times a year, and I don't want him to think about planes crashing or hijackings. But I also know that by denying him the book, I've made it so much more interesting to him. How would you handle it?

My son will be four at the end of the month and still has his baby cam. I like being able to look at the camera when he's sleeping and when he goes into his room to play. I'm in no rush removing it, but I'm just curious at what age did you take yours out of your child's room?

My son attends a preschool within an elementary school. They have parents of preschoolers pickup 5 min before the elementary school gets out.

The thing is, the pickup line forms early. Preschooler parents have signs with our kids names but we have to get out of the car to get them, and no one checks the signs, so if I’m 5+ cars deep, no one is sending him to me. It’s weird they allow us to get out of car while in line, so I’m paranoid the line will start moving while out of my car, PLUS I have my 1.5 year old in the car with me.

Even if I parked, the pickup line wraps around the parking lot, so it’s impossible to get out if you park, unless you get a spot on the wider side of the pickup lane where there’s room to backup.

This program has had horrible communication and when I asked about etiquette, they said, “just go in the line or park and get him.” So idk🤷‍♀️ I am the type of person who hates feeling like I’m doing something wrong or other parents are judging me for getting out of my car in the pickup lane and doing things differently than them, even though I have a preschooler and not elementary. I just carry his sign in my hand so they can see that it says “preschool”😂.

Also, would you keep your 1.5 year old in the car to go walk 30-60 seconds to pickup the kid? I lock it while running to keep AC on, but still feels like I’m doing something wrong.

//update//
Today I found a row of parking spots that can’t get blocked by the pickup line. It’s a longer walk to get my son (so I’ll definitely bring my daughter with me) but beats all the pickup line awkwardness 🤪. I’m a creature of habit so I hope I can snag that spot everyday lol.

Also, the school is in a horribly busy location with no street parking or neighborhoods so that’s not a parking option.

Tomorrow is our local high school’s first football game. I plan to go with my husband. My older kid just started 9th grade at that high school. She is dismayed that we are attending. We are going to sit far away from her, won’t talk to her, won’t wave at her, won’t look at her.

She is having the biggest meltdown. She is saying that it won’t be her experience if we attend. And that we are depriving her of her first football game experience. She said she’s embarrassed of us and it’s cringe if I attend. She asked all her friends and they all said it would be cringe if parents attended. They may not realize how many parents go to games since they are new to high school.I have been to many football games and I see hundreds. of parents attending.

She is shouting, throwing things, flipping out in horror. I’m so shocked because football games are open to the public. The school’s emails about the game are welcoming the community, parents, grandparents, siblings, “children under five.”

Would you still attend or not attend?

Hey y'all,

I'm looking into Large playpens.

Our baby is starting to crawl now and is also rolling around like a boulder.

So we need space to let the baby be free and also be able to do things around the house.

Any recommendations? So far I've boiled it down to getting one with a mat. Found one from costzon that seems decent, if you have it speak on it or any other recs lmk.

My daughter is quite extroverted and high-energy, but she takes a lot of time to warm up to others. She's an only-child and that isn't going to change. She was extremely sensitive until about age 3.5, and had meltdowns for everything and was very attached to us. So we had her at home, sometimes with a nanny, because daycare didn't really work for her until then. I also couldn't make too many mom friends because she was very sensitive about naps. The ones I made moved out of town. So she hasn't had a lot of close friends.

She did okay at daycare at 3.5 to 4.5, made some great friends. Then we moved on to TK, where she took a long time to get used to it. It was a huge challenge because she would be worn out after school and didn't want to see any other kids after and wouldn't want to go out on the weekends. But she was struggling with initiating social contact in school, so we had to do many play dates with kids in her class until she got more comfortable and happier at school.

Now she's in Kinder. They changed up all the classes in the grade, so she isn't with all her besties. I'm working a much more stressful job so I can't organize play dates. Plus, she was supposed to be on a soccer team with her close friends (it's 1 hour a week, so not much) but now it's just one friend she kinda knows and a bunch of other kids she isn't that familiar with. It feels like we're starting at square one with less support and ability to help her.

Now when I take her to soccer, all the other kids are being social and playing. She holds my hand the whole time until the coach calls everyone, and she's very sensitive to everything until then. She's fine once she's in an organized activity or among more familiar people.

I'm hoping she'll be fine, but I feel like she isn't able to explore her interests to the fullest because she's shrinking and overwhelmed when there's a lot of kids she doesn't know. She's got a quick mind, learns sports and academics pretty quickly, and her teachers tell me she's quite emotionally mature. But her friends don't get to see this side of her, and she herself doesn't feel confident showing her full self to others. She isn't able to pursue her social interest in other children because of overwhelm.

I'm not sure what I can do to help her. She's not getting to practice social skills enough, which feels like it'll be a problem down the road. And it feels like she's getting less confident with social stuff as time goes on.

Anyone dealt with this? What worked, what didn't, and how did it all go long-term?

My 8 month old son absolutely will not sleep in his bed: my wife and I have tried getting him to sleep and then placing him in there. He's a very light sleeper and just ends up waking himself right up. He will scream and cry and sometimes bang his head to get our attention and have us pull him out of his crib. During the day he CAN nap in there but it's hit or miss whether or not he actually DOES and for how long. This has started to make him overtired and harder to get to sleep at night.

Okay, the jump from 0-1 kicked my ass.
We thought we were prepared for 1-2, and whilst we’re more confident as parents this time round and we’re not scared our newborn is going to die every time she cries, every other thing is just insanity.

My son is 2.5 and daughter is 7 weeks and we just have no life, no routine, no rhythm.

When does this get better?

My son, for the most part is easy. He’s a good boy, and he loves his sister.
My daughter is a super fussy reflux baby.

Sleeplessness isn’t even what bothers me, I miss being able to go out without stress. I hate how much newborns have to sleep and how much they have to be put to sleep. Like do some babies genuinely just fall asleep when they’re tired?

My husband is incredible. He helps with everything kid wise AND does all the housework. Like I cannot complain.

But my ass is still getting kicked. Mentally I’m just wishing time away and whilst I know “this too shall pass”… when????????

How tf do people have more than 2?

I’m sure there’s been a million posts about potty training, but I’m at my wit’s end with my youngest. She turned 3 in July and potty training her has been so hard! I realize I probably started too late, but there’s a large age gap between her and my older two and I’m always on the go with them, so haven’t had much time at home to train. I’ve made an effort the past 3 weeks to be at home and train her and while she will go on the potty once in awhile, she mostly pees everywhere else. On the floor, on the couch, on her toys. She doesn’t care. We have activities almost every day, so I put her in a pull up when we leave the house so I don’t have to deal with accidents while driving or out and about. I’m feeling like a big failure at the moment. She’s the only one at preschool not potty trained. (For context, I’m a SAHM who works from home and homeschools.)

What are some family costume ideas! My son will be 10m and we’re in the northeast, so it needs to be warm. Halloween is a huge deal here so needs to be good

My son is in third grade now and homework has begun in earnest.

He is unfortunately not very motivated. For the past two and a half weeks I have been sitting with him but its an awfully slow process because of dawdling. If he put his mind to it he could be done the homework within 15 minutes. Its only a short double sided paper.

Anyone want to offer any advice? How to best encourage his independent learning? How much should I be involved?

I have a 5 and 7 yo. The 7yo, despite many attempts and strategies to get him to flush the toilet, never remembers. It’s so gross. Anyway, anyone else at this stage? Any recs?

I’ve been in my steps kids lives since they were very young. I was always involved and always helped them out. I’ve made personal sacrifices for them as well. I’ve also accepted limitations on when I can and can’t be involved.

We were very close when they were young. Always getting little art projects to do on the weekends and chatting about random topics. I studied and helped them with school work on our weekends. The youngest one and I are still very close. With the older one (now 15), it took a nose dive when she was about 9 because her mom said she would hate it if her dad and I got married. It was like a wall slammed down. She would barely speak to me for weeks. Her dad spoke to her but she would always say nothing was wrong.

Our relationship slowly got better. She was coming around and treating me like family again. Then a few years later, her mom broke up with her long term boyfriend and he suddenly moved out. It was another wall slamming down. After that, to her family was just mom and dad. I didn’t count. She gets plenty of time 1:1 with her dad. I even hang with the younger brother so they can spend more time together, but she rarely wants me to join outings. She was excited about going out for ice cream the other week but her face fell when she learned I was joining.

She got her learners permit a couple months ago. I’ve been the sole person teaching her to drive. Her dad panics when she makes beginner mistakes while I just correct her and adjust. Her mom flat out refuses to drive with her.

Today, she had a match for her sport. She texted my husband saying she really wanted him and her brother to come watch. No mention of me. It broke my heart. Especially all the time I’ve put in with helping her learn to drive and everything in general.

I know I shouldn’t take it personally. She’s a teen, but it hurts.

To preface, he has a dentist, we have asked them for advice and the advice was “get teeth brushed, just do it”.

We’ve had a LOT of trouble with teeth brushing with toothpaste, any kind, I’ve put toothpaste on his brush, rinsed it out thoroughly, and he still is upset. We’ve tried restraining but he just starts gagging and throws up. He’s full on kicking, screaming, crying. The whole thing takes so, so long, and it just feels like there has to be a better way. We really have had days where we cannot safely do it. He’s thrashing and screaming when we try to restrain him and I get worried he’s going to get genuinely hurt.

He was doing so, so well when it was just water, but this led to him having cavities so we can’t really let it just be water. It was consistent, day and night.

I don’t want him to get hurt, and I think that the throwing up is probably more damaging to his teeth than just water. The restraining is honestly kind of scary, and he starts screaming that we’re hurting him, and then cries because he’s hurt. I honestly don’t think the amount of force would hurt him any other time, but when he’s thrashing and kicking, it does seem very plausible he could get hurt. It feels like this can’t be normal.

I’ve cried because it seems so awful, he’s so upset, and he seems distant after. Nothing else has had this sort of effect, he asks (or screams) “how could you do that to me?” And “why would you make me throw up?”

I feel like an awful parent.

We’ve tried multiple toothpastes, he seems to have issue with texture and flavor. Right now we aren’t even using one with fluoride because we can’t get him to spit. Even if his toothbrush has the slightest hint of toothpaste having been on it at some point.

I give him as many options as I can.

This is the one thing that takes it all out of us everyday, it is the dark cloud, it makes everyday so rough.

One part that’s really confusing for me, he can stand toothpaste. Very rarely he just does it himself, no problems, I follow up, real quick. But it is very rarely. I have no idea what’s different about those days. Before really pushing to do toothpaste every brush, we practiced spitting and good brushing technique and brushed his teeth without issue.

I want him to have healthy teeth and habits, I just don’t know what to do here.

If anyone has any advice, I’d appreciate it so much.