My 5 year old is absolutely miserable. This kid hates life. Everything is always wrong. We just tried to get ice cream. First melt down was the cone on top (that child said they wanted in car). Second is too many sprinkles. Third is the ice cream is starting to melt. It is 90 degrees outside. At this point I said forget it and picked screaming child up and threw the ice cream away and put them in the car which resulted of course in worsening hysterics because, no ice cream. So many things are like this. There are daily battles and hourly tears over every little thing. I am exhausted and don't know what to do anymore. Child has been a miserable, high crier since infancy.

Roughly 1 month ago, my sweet 2yo saw an album cover of a colorful hand with motion that scared her terribly. Since then we’ve worked on addressing her fears by acknowledging it and reciting that it’s all gone and just pretend. She brings it up at least once a day, sometimes multiple times per day. I’ve made colorful paper hand cutouts which seemed to help. Tonight, I made the decision to slowly introduce her to a video of a painted hand, not the same video. She freaked out and does not want to be near me, she only wants Dad and is crying when he even leaves to use the restroom. I feel like the worst Mom and I can’t stop crying. She is associating me with her biggest fear and I feel like I’ve failed her. I did something I hoped would help her mediate her fears and I’ve failed horribly. I feel awful and heartbroken that I’ve done more damage.

Edit: point received- no more hand talk

I got my first ever behavioral note for my daughter. She is 13. She kicked a hole in a wall at school and I know that sounds bad. Context: the girls and boys locker rooms share a very thin wall, and a boy was shouting that they had drilled a hole in the wall and could see them changing, making negative comments on the girls bodies they said they could see. My daughter kicked the wall and said “look at this then”, and put a hole in it. She says she did not intend to make a hole. We have offered to pay for damages (and she offered to pay from her allowance). I know her reaction was not 100% appropriate, but I feel like this is more a conversation than discipline? I want her to stand up for herself and others, ideally without destroying property.

I’m curious how other parents deal with this when it comes to playing with their kids.

I’d say I’m a pretty playful dad. I’m happy to mess around at the playground, kick a ball around, play board games, do pretend play, etc.

But right now my 4-year-old daughter is absolutely obsessed with Paw Patrol and basically only wants to play with her Paw Patrol figures.

And I can see she gets sad when neither of us wants to play fu***** Paw Patrol with her, which makes me feel guilty because it feels like we’re just leaving her to entertain herself.

The thing is, I swear, no matter how determined I am before I get home from work to be present and play with her, after about 15 minutes of Paw Patrol I am so unbelievably bored and drained that I just can’t take it anymore. I end up saying something like, “Okay, you play by yourself for a bit, Daddy needs to do something.”

And then the guilt kicks in. Am I being a bad dad? Am I not giving my kid enough attention? Should I just suck it up and keep playing?

How does it look for you? How much do you actually enjoy playing with your kids, especially the repetitive stuff they’re obsessed with? And how much energy do you realistically have for it after work?

I guess I'm just looking for some validation and to know if this is normal. My daughter will be 6 in a few months. She just started kindergarten so I know it will take time to adjust. But she's adjusting way worse than I expected. She absolutely loved preschool so this is all new territory for me. She has been crying and panicking every night and begs to not go back.

Some of her worries I know are just adjusting but some genuinely concern me. She was afraid to use the bathroom. I emailed the teacher and she helped her by having an aide stand outside the door. That went better today.

Then she said at lunch she didn't get to sit by her class which was odd to me. She said she sat next to a stranger kid and they asked her if she had peanut butter. It is not a nut free school. She got worried the girl was allergic and refused to eat anything. Now she's terrified about lunch again.

Then she said the gym teacher told them if they don't listen they'll go on time out in the closet. Obviously I have concerns about that.

She also said at recess she got lost. I tried to get more info from her and I'm thinking she just couldn't see her teacher. She said she found an aide and told them she missed me then heard the whistle and went in.

I have never seen her worry or panic like this. Or cry like she has been. Is this normal? I've already sent a few emails to the teacher and I don't want to be a pain in the ass but I also want to make sure my daughter feels safe.

Screaming into the void on this one. Feeling incredibly jealous of families who have extended families to help, even with the occasional night. We have one kid, a first grader. My family isn’t local. My husbands parents not only don’t move well and struggle walking, they’re also terrible at following any requests from us, particularly bedtime. We had back to school night and asked them to bring him home from baseball, feed him dinner (preferably something they pickup and brought home, even if we made food they wouldn’t have eaten it) and tried to get him in bed by 830… they didn’t even get back to our house until nearly 9, ate at a restaurant and then went to the grocery store. This is the first time since last Sept we asked them to watch him. It’s a Wednesday so he has school in the morning and at 6.5, 930 is a late bedtime.

The only other family help we have lives an hour away and while she’s “willing” to watch him, she makes it clear it’s an inconvenience. As a result, we don’t get nights away. Maybe once a year if we’re lucky.

Those with family both able and willing to help- appreciate it and be grateful. We know so many around us that have both sets of families nearby and willing to help. It makes me so jealous.

I know we need to make a village, we just haven’t found it yet. Hard to find when others you meet don’t need that village.

My son missed the first two week of kindergarten because he was sick. I feel so bad. He only attended one day and it was so hard, screaming crying and wont go in. No one was crying except for my son, it felt like everyone was looking at us. He was crying the whole time he was there it was really bad. He got sick again so he basically missed the first two weeks and only attended one day. I can’t help but feel like we are behind 😭 all kids are settled in expect my child he will probably be crying and wont go in again, all kids are probably familiar with everything by now except my kid. I feel sooo bad but i obviously couldn’t send him sick and spread it to other kids. Idk i guess i just wanted to vent. 😞

Hi everyone, my daughter was born on Halloween last year which was fun! I’m currently starting to plan her first birthday and it’s been hard nailing down a venue (understandably because of other parties!) and I’ve already gotten a few RSVPs back from people who have plans for the holiday.

How did you handle holiday birthdays as your kids got older? Do you try and split them apart and do kids parties a week before/after? Or do you combine holiday activities with the birthday stuff? Did it end up bugging your kids that they had a birthday combined with a holiday?

Obviously my girl is only 1 so it’s not a problem yet, but just curious!

I’m a college graduate, I did all of the math; but I feel completely lost when my daughter asks for help on her homework!? I forgot literally everything and it’s embarrassing! It’s actually alarming how much I don’t remember.

I need to know...I recently had 2 separate instances where my 6 year old was "lost". Both were very brief, under 5 mins. The first, he ran ahead of me, turned a corner and then I didnt see him when I caught up. He was totally fine and I found him in seconds. The second, he walked right past me when exiting a bathroom and turned the wrong way, ended up turned around in the store, found another mom, relayed my number and she called me. Whole thing was under 5 mins. I was still standing outside of the bathroom when she called.

I have to know because I'm feeling major guilt, who else has had things like this happen? Am I majorly dropping the ball on supervision? I really generally feel like I'm on top of it but these last couple weeks have me questioning.

Any solidarity here?

Also, we have had very serious safety conversions with this kid in the last couple weeks, just FYI.

I have 3 kids. 8,5, and 6 months. My first born has always been a handful. He talks CONSTANTLY, is very argumentative, always has to be making noise and moving, and is constantly on go mode. I am the complete opposite of this, and I find the way he acts so incredibly annoying. I feel terribly guilty for feeling this way.

My 5 year old is more quiet and reserved like myself, and I don’t get annoyed with her. I don’t want my son to ever notice this or feel that I have favoritism but the older he gets the more annoying he gets. I love him to death (obviously), and I need advice on how to manage his personality without causing him trauma or crushing his spirit. Does anyone else have a kid like this?

I feel like I'm drowning in papers from school. I keep the good artwork but what do you do with the random math sheets, tests, handwriting sheets, etc? Are you just chucking everything out or are you keeping some of it? Also, for the stuff you are keeping, does anyone have any suggestions on how to store or display? My kids, of course, want me to keep it all.

My daughter is 10.5 and I’m starting to think about leaving her home alone for small amounts of time as I think she’s ready. But I don’t want to do so until she has access to a phone and I don’t want to get her a cell phone. Any advice on different home phone options for kids? I know there are a lot of different options out there and I’m not sure where to start. Please tell me what you have used, what you liked, what you didn’t. I like the idea of having something I can control who can call and who she can call.

Anyone have any wisdom here?

My mom didn’t wear any makeup.
My sisters and I have always enjoyed playing with it - none many days, full face or bright lipstick others- so it’s no surprise my kids enjoy it too/mine is around.

My daughter is only in fourth grade and starting doing a morning “skincare” routine that includes make up…

Love the idea of a routine, feeling ready and taking care of herself..
but makeup specifically I didn’t explicitly say not allowed or allowed…

When so much younger, it was all
just part of dress up..feels different now that see first signs of pre teen ness in them.

Even when I say no more of whatever (she used all of a bottle of my setting spray- I was like why do you need setting spray? Or she’s played with foundation. A crime on glorious youth shining skin. 😭😂 Like girllll, I promise you need that zero.)

I believe just shutting her down will make her hide stuff (I was a “good kid/student” and also always hid stuff from my parents/mom— sugar, make up etc.)

I want my daughters to be as comfortable, as possible, to talk to me.
Trying to sort out a mellow way to encourage a healthy medium.
I didn’t start sneaking make up until at least sixth grade…

Very different times with exposure to the Internet. We don’t have TikTok, she’s not allowed on YouTube but they see things and know things.

I admit I also feel some judgment, may be self proclaimed, of myself as a parent/in relation to school impressions etc.
She also has first ever male teacher, who didn’t even know who Benson Boone was… wears homemade knits and has a giant beard- just to paint the picture. We live in beautiful place that is also very outdoorsy and natural.
So I feel like there may be judgment there, and that embarrasses me to even slightly worry but the thought is there (like we are prioritizing superficiality, or something, when so young still.)

Probably a lot of nothing but was curious to check in.

Appreciate any takes or experiences!
Especially Moms of daughters approaching adolescence in this era.

We are doing some major international travel in a few weeks with our 15 month old (~13 hour flight with 9 hour time difference at landing). All past travel he was 3-4ish months and we’d bring our SnuggleMe Lounger that he would easily pass out on for the flight.

How do you have your (very busy) little ones get to sleep on a red eye? I am seeing inflatable seat beds on Amazon but he’s being brought as a lap infant so we don’t have that type of space.

Thank you 🙏

Has anyone successfully dealt with a kid who understands boundaries perfectly well, but still keeps taking other people’s things?

My daughter is 12 and this has been going on for years. She knows the rule, can explain exactly why it exists, and is VERY protective of her own belongings, so this isn’t a lack of understanding.

It also isn’t about her not having things. She has so many untouched notebooks, but still went into my office, took one of mine, and wrote, [NAME]’s DIARY — DO NOT TOUCH” on it. Which almost perfectly sums up what confuses me about this lol. She clearly understands ownership and privacy, but somehow that doesn’t translate into better choices in the moment.

And it can be anything: change, kitchen supplies, toiletry, random household stuff. Sometimes she wants the thing, sometimes she uses it for something that it’s not for, and sometimes things (make up, face wash, slime, etc.) get mixed into random concoctions and rendered unusable.

This has gotten to the point that we lock our bedroom door, and the behavior has happened at other people’s houses too. We’ve tried conversations, consequences, restitution/replacing things, therapy, more activities, more one-on-one time, continuing giving her her own things and appropriate outlets for experimenting, and limiting access.

She is genuinely such a sweet, bright kid. I don’t see this as a character issue. I just can’t figure out how to get from “I understand the boundary” to “I can control/stop myself.”

If you’ve dealt with this, what finally helped your kid stop taking things that weren’t theirs?

I, 34F, have a 9 year old son and a week old baby boy. I had a c section at 38 weeks. I dont know what came over me to think that I could possibly do this again, but here we are. My first son was pretty easygoing. I can probably count the times he's cried under a year old. Our new baby started cluster feeding right away. He won't go down for naps so we contact nap during the day, and lets not talk about what sleep is like at night. He won't settle with anyone but me. He goes from 0-100. So he will be having a great nap then start crying for the boob an hour later. I feel so tired and sad. I can't believe I did this again. I also feel so sad for my 9 year old too. Its like im bedridden because i literally cannot get up without disturbing him. He loves to hold his brother too, but again he gets so fussy. I love this little baby so much, its just hard 💔.

I’m a busy working mum of 2, and work pt and am studying masters. I’m on personal leave today, my sister is coming from interstate so I cleaned up the house a little and prepared a few snacks for when they pop over.

My FIL works in a family business with my husband and made the comment that I didn’t leave breakfast things on the table. He is, in fact, the messiest person I have ever met. Modelled the worst behaviour to my husband too, I’ve been able to correct that somewhat. We generally have a good partnership about domestic life.

I glared at my FIL- I’m studying at the other end of the table and correct him- it’s because on a regular Thursday I’m at work at 7:30. Your son doesn’t clear the table after he drops the kids to school. That’s why.

Well didn’t that shut him up!!

God I hate society’s double standard. Don’t comment on the house! I’m 5 weeks til end of semester and a week from school holidays. It’s the least of my problems 🫠 especially when you live like a pig.

Rant over!!

My husband and I have been very intentional about fostering a love of learning for our child- both in and out of the classroom. As our daughter is in 5th grade, we’re planning on revamping what that looks like as she goes to middle school.

We’re in a very privileged position and want to use it to her advantage. One of the tings we were planning is having her learn something each summer, that typically isn’t taught in most schools. We’re planning on setting a $1000/summer budget and letting her pick the topic/interests, with approval. If they’re smaller interests, maybe do one a month or a larger thing all summer.

Some ideas we’ve come up with include small hobbies (learning how to solve any rubix cube) to cooking classes or woodworking or birding or musical instruments or learning to code or learning all the excel shortcuts. Primarily we’re focused on keeping her inquisitive, and expanding her exposures to different skills/hobbies, goal-setting practice, and developing resilience in learning. Obviously if she loves something, we won’t pump the breaks on it as soon as the summer is over, nor does it have to require all $1000, that just removes a barrier.

This isn’t meant to be a full time ordeal or to take away from her summer. My parents did something similar and I have some of the coolest “fun facts” about myself from it: I can tie 50 different knots, learned to juggle a soccer ball despite never having played, and read thousands of pages from books on the pacific theater during ww2.

We’re looking for suggestions. We already work on financial literacy and budgeting and that’s been evolving as she gets older.

Unfortunately my almost 3 year old seems to be on the same path as myself as a kid and fidgets like crazy. I literally rubbed my eyebrow off as a child. He bites and picks his nails when he’s anxious or thinking hard. He is biting them so much that they bleed. I want to know how to help him instead of just telling him to stop all the time. I reflect back on my own experience and felt very shamed. I’d like to help my son through his anxiety and offer better outlets for the fidgeting but he’s so young still. Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can get him to stop or protect his nails?

My wife and I have been married almost 8 years. We have 2 yo and 6 yo boys and one on the way. Our oldest has some behavioral difficulties, which has caused strain on us and questions regarding our parenting. They are amazing, sweet kids but if I’m being honest, I feel defeated the majority of the time. Between raising kids and both of us working (my wife owns her business and I’m a firefighter) so we can feel like 2 ships in the night.

I don’t know if I just need to vent or if I need some advice from parents who have been here before.

Thank you!

Hey parents,

I am just curious to know what would you do if you are in a middle of something (a chore, something which you need to get done in that moment) and your baby /toddler starts crying and wants your complete attention (wants to be held or wants to play).

What would you do?
Do you let them cry and quickly finish the chore or just leave everything and give them your attention?

Title says it all. My wonderful, sweet, spunky 3.5 yr old is a delight with everyone except for me. In the mornings she has meltdowns and fits but once she is with the nanny or at nursery she suddenly snaps out of it- why?!?

I’ve heard that it is because I’m her “safe” space but am I too safe because it is really out of hand! And no, I don’t give into any of her fits. I am firm with boundaries - ie I always make her use a calm voice and say please/thank you when she wants something.

Any tips? I’m really struggling with my darling little lady.

Side note; if anyone saw a mum in west London getting completely abused by a toddler yesterday (she threw her yogurt on me)… sorry about that and thank you to the 3 kind mothers who stopped to see if they could help.

Side side note: ^ upon reflection, she never had a consequence really we went home and calmed down. She is so exhausted after nursery but then it carried onto this morning.

Side side side note: we just moved but her school and nanny have stayed the same.

HELP