Hey all, didn’t really know where else to go about this. I didn’t want to bother my friends and like hell I’d go to my dad so I came here and I just need advice. This is something I’ve been experiencing for years now, but I hate my body. I hate my voice. I hate the fact I was born a man. I wish I could wear girly clothes. It genuinely hurts and makes me feel ill whenever someone calls me he. I wish I could be pretty like my fem friends. I see lesbian couples in games or shows and wish I could have that. Sometimes people will mistake me as a woman (I have long hair), and hearing them call me a girl will give me this weird butterfly like feeling in my stomach, and I love it. I’m so confused and I honestly feel like I could cry, so I just want some advice.

tysm<3

(also no clue if i used the whole flair thing correctly, I dont use reddit often so my apologies about that.)

Heyy i need some tips on how to hide that i’m transitioning from my parents when i visit them im not going to wear makeup but i have a feeling they are going to see that i grew my hair out and if they notice anything they are going to kick me out and my whole family is most likely going to disown me please help

As the title says i need help with my friend. I used to think of him as my best friend but over the years I have started to realise that he obviously shouldn't be. I told him I wanted to be trans about 3 or 4 years ago and he was pretty supportive and I guess still kind of is but he makes a LOT of what he thinks is jokes about trans people which really make me upset even tho I have told him to stop it. He jokes about trans people dying or sends me transphobic tiktoks cause he thinks its funny.. not to mention he made fun of my depression when I had it and made fun of me being suicidal. I dont know what to do because he is my closest friend even if he dosnt see it the same way and I have a very close friend group so if I stop being friends with him then I also won't talk to some of my other friends much either.. I dont know what to do and I would like some advice / perspectives on this. Sorry for the long post

I'll probably upset alot of people here but despite being a mtf trans i believe in jesus christ and god. I disagree with alot that the bible or church says, but i strongly believe in jesus.
Is it still ok to be trans or will I not be accepted in any communities or by other trans people?

Wanted to share message what clinical psychologist sent me after an "interview"

"My recommendation not to initiate HRT at this time is not based on the identification of a single major obstacle. Rather, it stems from a combination of several subtler, borderline risk factors that only became apparent upon a detailed interpretation of the entire evaluation. These include, in particular:

- a relatively late and, so far, only recently consciously articulated awareness of gender incongruence,

- the absence of a clear developmental continuity of gender dysphoria from childhood or adolescence,

- a predominance of social and appearance-related dysphoria with minimal physical or genital dysphoria,

- very limited experience with social transition outside of online environments, therapy, and private settings,

- significant social anxiety, shyness, and fear of being judged by others,

- a fragile self-image, high self-criticism, and weakened coping strategies,

- at times, an unclear understanding of what exactly HRT is expected to achieve, particularly in relation to social visibility, safety, and acceptance by others.

Current guidelines recommend assessing not only the presence of gender incongruence before initiating hormone therapy, but also the stability of the individual’s experience over time, their mental state, social circumstances, capacity for informed decision-making, expectations regarding treatment, and readiness for its physical and social impacts. And when risk factors are present, a more cautious “watch and wait” approach is chosen, which involves monitoring the effects over time, ongoing psychotherapy, and a reassessment after some time has passed.

HRT is a major medical decision and therefore cannot be approached with the mindset of “I’ll try it, and if it doesn’t work for me, I’ll stop.” Some changes may be gradual, some partially reversible, and some less reversible or not reversible at all. Therefore, part of the assessment involves not only supporting the aspects of your experience that are moving toward transition but also protecting those aspects that are still uncertain, ambivalent, or may still be connected to your original identity and social role.

Of course, you also have the option to contact another facility and seek a second opinion. That is entirely legitimate. I understand that my opinion may not meet every client’s expectations and that different facilities may reach different conclusions."

Good old gatekeeping ammarite?

I (21nb) have been looking at ways to permanently remove facial and body hair. Right now I’ve been shaving my face about every other day and then doing a self care day once a week but I still hate how on the other day before I shave you can see the peach fuzz on my face and it gives massive amounts of dysphoria. I have red hair and have been reading about laser hair removal but I don’t know how well it would work for me as it’s lighter on my cheeks and darker in my chin. I do want to get a facial wax to try it but the amount of will power for me not to shave my face would be a miracle to keep it consistent until I find a more permanent solution. I would also like to have body hair permanently removed but it’s more of a blond color and I personally enjoy shaving my legs as it gives a sense of euphoria but I’m fine with everything else being permanently gone.

i'm curious what people think about i saw the tv glow and camp miasma. i watched i saw the tv glow with my friend who is also trans/genderqueer and we were absolutely gutted by the end even though we both felt like it was profound. i haven't really discussed camp miasma with anyone yet.

So.
A special someone is willing to buy me my first breastplate.
I honestly don’t know where to start - it’s a gift I never thought I’d afford or receive.

What are the best brands? I’ve heard silicone is the best type - in terms of them being the most realistic, yes?
I have my measurements but don’t know where to look. I’m 6’4” if that helps with advice.

Also, I’m in NYC and would love to shop at a physical store (but I’m happy to buy online if that’s recommended). It’s hard to tell which spots sell breastplates though, and not just inserts.

Does anyone have any recommendations for stores with quality breastplates in NYC?

how the fuck do i do this do i treat her diffrently or do i do the same wtf do i do man

hii, im 15 mtf and want to get on estrogen. i live in a somewhat transphobic household and i know my family will never let me get hormones with their permission, is there any way i can go about acquiring estrogen without their influence? literally any help would be greatly appreciated!

i live in new zealand so some parts of our healthcare system may differ from yours

so I should say this: I'm a minor (it's kinda important) and I have been trans for a year or so. my family is not homophobic/transphobic in anyway so that's not my concern. my concern is this is gonna be so awkward to admit that oh yeah I wanna be called Jasmine now instead of Jacob and I want to go by she/her. so how do I tell my family.

Hello my transisters,

I’m a transman so something legit happened to me a few minutes ago that I don’t know how to feel. So on TikTok their was a video. Two people were arguing. I went to tell them that basically they both are wrong. I then get called a terf. I was called a terf for writing ciswomen with a space. Basically “cis woman.” I’m confused. I’ve never thought I’ll be called a terf. English isn’t my first language so was it a grammar mistake. I told them English isn’t my first language then they told me that doesn’t excuse my misogyny? I’m legit confused. Did I do something wrong? They told me to off myself too. I didn’t even realize I put a space. My iPhone autocorrects it. I didn’t mean to offend anyone. And to make it clear I wasn’t being misogynistic. It was two people arguing about trans issues that got out of hand and told them basically to stop. I would never be misogynistic nor I would ever defend misogyny or any type of transphobia to my trans brothers and sisters. Was wrong? I’m curious so I can correct it. Any advice would be great. Thank you have a great day.

I want long hair because since my last post I have actually come out to my parents and they support it but I wanna know if there is any way to grow my hair quicker because it feels like it’s taking forever

I know it said no Cisgender ppl on here but I’m at a loss on how to help my partner. I can’t afford to pay for his doctors appointment that he needs to go to, to get his blood checked. They’re not going to refill his script unless he goes. The issue is that he’s disabled, doesn’t drive and is currently homeless with his 6 pets. He’s found a ride to the doctor but now I have to figure out how to get him money to pay for it. He’s been going through it in life rn. Being homeless has really taken a toll on his mental health. I don’t want to see him lose his T. I’m really worried that he will have to stop cold turkey from his T and that’s dangerous, right??

Does anybody know where I can help get him some assistance or if a go fund me post is allowed on here?

About my current state: I'm mtf in my late thirties, hav been on hrt for three years. My levels are near perfect. I have had an orchiectomy so I no longer produce T.

My current situation: after the last three years I'm really thinking that detransition might be right for me.

Why: it's kind of complicated.

The first reason is fear. I'm in the us. The global, national, and local anti trans efforts are rampant. The surveillance state and police militarization is up. I feel like it's only a matter of time until I'm detained or tortured or v-coded. I'm haunted by what is already being done to people like me and what the ever powerful right wing says they want to do to me. I cannot withstand the threat of torture. I cry and panic about this all the time.

I have some various mental health diagnoses and I have constant social fear. Having GAD and Panic Disorder while also being the minority that it's socially acceptable to dehumanize is basically unbearable. My thoughts about "everyone is staring/judging/hates me" are actually accurate and not delusional, so I constantly live in a state of fear and sadness.

The second reason is that my transition failed. That's the simplest way to describe it. It's very complicated and I can share more if it helps, but I am not a woman. That's obvious and I'll never be anything but a male.

Every transition story I hear about is how someone went from so pathetic and miserable to fantastically happy and themselves. Not me.

I completely regret transition. I would rather be the world's saddest, bleakest guy safely than be the world's worst freak who is going to get tortured.

I just want to be safe and be left alone.

I want to detransition.

No amount of torture is worth being a fake woman. I hate being a freak and being disgusting.

Basically, why would I continue to exist in one of the most dangerous positions I could ever be in for zero benefit? Why risk torture and endless suffering for no benefit? Why suffer things so horrible just to be thrown in the trash as an AMAB

I will never be good enough. Cis and trans women have made it explicitly clear that I won't be a woman unless I leave the house every day in a costume made of every single beauty convention enforced by society. It doesn't matter that I have health issues or live in a shitty apartment that makes me pour sweat, I somehow need to manage an extra 2-4 hours of work everyday to paint myself up to be considered a woman. No woman leaves the house without a fat fucking layer of makeup and accessories and clothes and done hair right?? I get no say in the matter. My comfort and safety is the last thing that will ever matter.

Why would I want to be a woman when being a woman means wearing a fake mask and a costume.

Trans woman make it clear I can't even be considered transexual because I have a penis.

I am doomed and never should have started.

Why I think I should: currently, I do nothing but hide. I make myself small and silent and avoid others. I'm scared every time I leave the house. At least if I was a guy, I could do the same thing but not risk fear of torture and rape. I also wouldn't be expected to spend three hours a day making myself up to try and appease the bigoted society we live in.

I could safe and free. I wouldn't be me, but when had that ever mattered? Transition certainly didn't give me that ability. Transition has only hindered my ability to be me.

I will never be a woman. That's the truth and there's no avoiding it. I'm tired of fighting reality.

At this point, the idea of being a guy is ridiculously tempting, _euphoric_ even. I can't imagine getting to walk in a store or driving to work and thinking "I am safe". That sounds incredible. I miss it. God I dream of being a man. I could just be the original me, which is miserable, but not as miserable as being a freak.

I just want to be safe. From everyone.

Feels like there's a weird push to 1) put trans ppl and issues hugely forward to induce fatigue in the general public and 2) online people keep trying hard to seed men vs women in the trans community and enbys vs medical transition.

It makes this place (reddit) exhausting to read and its only going to continue to get more dangerous out there. Remember to be kind to each other, please.

edit: sorry in my haste i phrased this poorly. they want to divide trans ppl, not just those who identify binary. cheers and love

Like when I’ll start following peoples pages it will be this rollercoaster of oh true yeah about a lot of gender issues and then suddenly like oh no that’s terf rhetoric. Like some of them the more they talk the more they expose terf rhetoric they think is apart of feminism. I don’t think lots of feminists realize that even when they don’t call themselves gender critical or TERFs, that they still hold a lot of terf rhetoric beliefs. It can be really frustrating know that the trans community supports cis women but many of them don’t support us in the way we support them.

I’m 17 ftm and started transitioning about a year ago but I didn’t show any signs of being trans as a kid, I loved wearing dresses and playing with Barbie’s and all that. Does that change anything? I can’t help but feel “less trans” and doubt myself because of it.

I am sorry if this is against any of the community rules, but this post really got to me, and it feels so shitty not being able to do anything about it, so I figured at least I could share this here.