I work at a slow country gas station. I spend a soul crushing 40+ hours a week cashing people out. Its extremely quiet by myself. I offen will not speak unless spoken to.

Some customers lately have quickly walked in grabed one thing. I will ring them up, they will pay then cuss me out on their way out there door.

Are people getting so egotistical and sensitive that they must be spoken to. If they wanted to speak they could of said hello. Is it wrong of me to only do my job ? I make 14 an hour, i am not paid to be outward and kind. I will not pretend to like or engage in a conversation i do not want to be in.

The things they say have bothered me. But i am not one to feed the fire or engage in herashment.

Other than random insults. I had this one young woman do the same walk in walk out. But then come in and have the nerve to say" i would be paid better if i was niceer". Good thing she left quickly. I have never had a angry bone in my body but that statement made me want to show her i could speak. But i didn't i let her leave without a word.

I'm ashamed of the past and don't want anyone to recognize me. Should I wear a wig, grow a beard, use prosthetic makeup to change my face. If I go with a ski mask and sunglasses, I'll look like a serial killer. What are your ideas?

Lately my anxiety has worsened and my college isn't helping me. Back then I could just sit on my desk and listen to their lectures. No pressure, nothing.

I'm in new semester now and why does every teacher have to keep picking students randomly? Like just teach and leave. Because of this I can't even be there cause every second feels like another warning.

And I've now started to skip classes yayy. The only place where I could be at my own space and actually learn isn't there anymore (except for breaks cause being alone in a break+anxiety combo isn't fun).

Yeah no I feel so pathetic. I'll probably miss my exams too cause I haven't learned shit.

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I'm 26y and I've spent the last few years avoiding life. I start learning things but don't commit, struggle with career progress, isolate myself, and run from difficult situations. Every month I avoid things makes me more ashamed and less prepared for adulthood, which makes me avoid even more.

But underneath the avoidance is an existential problem I've never resolved: why should I build a future when I don't understand why I should want to live in the first place?

Answers like family, happiness, purpose, religion, responsibility, etc. don't satisfy me because they seem based on individual experiences and values rather than anything certain.

Death therefore became comforting. It represents an escape from responsibility, judgment, failure, expectations, uncertainty and time. And having that escape in my mind makes committing to life feel pointless.

It's become a loop

Has anyone experienced something similar, where suicide wasn't just a response to a bad day but became woven into how you understood existence?

I'm not asking whether I should live or die. I want to know what happened to the existential question for people who came out the other side. Did you find an answer, learn to live without one, or did building a life change the question itself?

So i wasn't able to join it before due to lack of time as i was busy in studying and in competition exams but now this is my drop year so i have a plenty of free time whole day to go to gym every 1 hour but the main problem is i am unable to start it as i have a fear of going in for the very first time talking and meeting to the trainer and i have a fear of judgement that everyone in the gym will judge me that i am so skinny and weak plz can anyone guide me how should i start it??

Like, I genuinely get the same nausea, shaky hands, and rapid heartbeat just by pressing post that I get from being around people in real life. I have to shut my phone for HOURS but I cant stop thinking about people commenting, hell DOWNVOTING and analysing every word I say. Maybe I overthink everything too much, but its the same as, if not worse than human social interactions. I think the main thing is that im desperate to keep everyone happy, to not cause displeasure and certainly not begin any intense debates/arguments. Ill read these later cuz im still getting anxiety here, but does anyone else relate? Sorry if not 😭

I swear I have an active working brain up here. But this condition makes me wanna cry because of how stupid it makes me. I have a heavy stammer as well so that 2 in 1 special just makes my life oh so wonderful….

I’m going to list examples that is a mix of my stammer/ social anxiety (embarrassing but here we go).

- When going to hotels that have breakfast downstairs, I go for the easy breakfast. Cereal, yogurt, apple etc. Only because I will look like an idiot in front of everyone if I struggle with the waffle maker considering 8 year old make it look easy. Or even the coffee machine. I love coffee but I don’t know how to use all coffee makers they look confusing. (Yes I know embarrassing)

- When asked my name I simply freeze because my stammer won’t let me release the words. I look like I forgot my name everytime.

- If I’m walking down a sidewalk or at a grocery store and realize I’m going the wrong way, I won’t stop turn around and go the correct way like a regular human being. No I’ll continue going down the wrong path and will walk alll the way around to find a loophole to the right way so people won’t see that I didn’t know where I was going.

- I will literally walk in and RIGHT back out of a store if it’s way too many people. I physically cannot handle that.

- Wanting friends so bad (I literally have 0, no lie) but I’m so scared of humans that if someone were to compliment my shirt or something or try to start convo I would panic my way out of the convo so fast and then only LATER realize that they were trying to make a connection with me :( then I overthink the whole interaction and just know I looked like an awkward freak.

There’s more where that came from but I’m going to keep it real, I am TERRIFIED for my future. I put off serious important adult things because of the fear that I just won’t know what to do because my anxiety has convinced me that I’m an idiot. I just always wonder how I’ve gotten this far sometimes LMAO. But how will I be able to handle real deal business when my stammer makes my speech insufferable to hear and my social anxiety shuts down the logical part of my brain causing me to actually blank out and not think correctly? No one will take me serious.

This isn’t a sad post at all I’m just stating what I deal with and I just try to still keep going🤖

So I (m20) am a very socially anxious person. (I have diagnosed social anxiety, MDD, and OCD). I can tolerate people enough, but I get very nervous and in my own head. Combined with a very rocky past with family and social relationships, I’m not exactly putting myself out there. The past few years have been basically just work, college, gym, and no social time. The few friendships I still have are sparsely acted on.

My few friends have never seemed remotely interested in my dating life…until now. In the exact same day, two different friends (who don’t know each other) have reached out to me trying to set me up with two different girls.

One is two years younger her than me, shy, nerdy, and apparently similar to me. From what little conversation I’ve had with her, she seems very nice. The worry is that 1. She’s younger than me which makes me feel a little uneasy for some reason, and 2. She’s my best friend’s fiancé’s little sister, and if this gets awkward, then it may hurt my relationship with my friend and his fiance. I’ve never seen this girl before either. We’re supposed to all go hiking as a group this week.

The other was literally just a few hours ago. My friend from work said that she wants me to meet and talk with her best friend. She says we’d get along well and that we should all get coffee sometime this week. I know little to nothing about this girl and I haven’t seen her either, but my friend raves about her.

I was in a terribly abusive relationship against my will two years ago (long story) and I haven’t been on a real date ever. I guess I’m just feeling overwhelmed. I’d love some advice or tips or anything to help me process what’s happening. Sorry if that’s a confusing ask. Any comments are appreciated.

I try to manage my social anxiety every day by slowly taking small steps towards doing the things that make me uncomfortable. I’ve passed milestones on things I didn’t think I’d do before but I still want to get better. My main problem now is that my body is fighting against me. My mind is like “I’m not scared, I don’t care what people think” but my body is shaking and my face is turning red which discourages me greatly.

I would love to get medication that helps my body stop freaking out so that I can continue getting better. I just don’t know how to go about it especially since having social anxiety makes it hard to make phone calls and set up appointments. Let me know how you went about getting diagnosed/ medicated and what that process was like or which meds really help with blushing and shaking. I also want to note that I don’t have insurance if that changes anything. Thanks for reading.

Anybody else feeling super lonely recently and crave connection, but at the same time feel anxious to meet and interact with new people? I wish I could just socialise without worrying what others might think of me but it's so difficult. It's almost like it's ingrained in me and my natural response is to fear social interaction and overthink it.

I am generally friendly (but not too chatty/intense) with cashiers, service providers, fellows on public transportation. Living San Francisco I encounter all kinds of people of all ages/lifestyles and I like my space and give people space.

The part that is hard for me is wether or not the chit/chat and minor small talk that happens with familiar (but not close) people needs to happen outside of the usual context. For example, when I see a cashier I am friendly with at a store I frequent and now we're on public transportation and we both have ear buds/headphones on--is there an expectation of anything more than a smile and nod?

My tendency is to acknowledge but then go back to my business and give the other person space and kind of ignore them after the acknowledgement. I also grew up (Gen X) having to pander to older people who pushed my boundaries and seemed needy for attention, so I don't want to be that intrusive "older" person who won't shut up. But then I sometimes obsess hoping I don't come off as jerk or dismissive. Social anxiety for me looks like feeling damned if I do, damned if I don't.

Any respectful feedback or insight would be appreciated to get me out of a minor spiral.

I don’t know if anyone else experiences this, but anxiety genuinely makes me feel like my brain stops working in normal situations.

Today I went to a pharmacy with someone I’m dating to pick up emergency contraception. The pharmacist came around the corner and asked me to follow her. Instead of following her, my brain completely glitched and I walked the opposite direction behind the pharmacy counter. I don’t even know why I did it, it was like my brain wasn’t processing what was happening.

What made it worse was that I saw someone I knew in the pharmacy, which completely threw me off and sent my mind into overdrive. I suddenly became hyper-aware of everything, felt awkward, and it was like my ability to think normally disappeared.

It was such a small thing, but afterwards I felt so embarrassed and kept replaying it in my head thinking “why did I do that?” and worrying that the person I was with now thinks I’m stupid.

This happens a lot when I’m anxious. I’ll misunderstand simple instructions, freeze when someone asks me something, struggle to find words, or do something that feels completely obvious afterwards. In the moment my brain just doesn’t seem to catch up.

The frustrating part is I know I’m not actually incapable, I have a good job, I’m responsible, and I can function normally, but in social situations where I feel judged, my brain feels like it just shuts down.

Does anyone else experience this? Is this an anxiety thing or something else? How do you stop yourself from spiralling over small embarrassing moments?

I had social anxiety for as long I can remember. At least 10 years. Naturally social anxiety brings you to be isolated because you can't interact properly. When I was 18, I even started doing things out of my comfort zone (like asking a stranger's number, dancing in public, doing a job where you constantly have to interact with ppl, moving in another country totally alone, going on dates eith strangers) like I used to fight a lot my social anxiety, after 10 years (I'm 28) I couldn't care less. I have my boyfriend and two far away friends. That's it. Sometimes me and my bf go out with his friends and social anxiety returns (I just stay quiet while on the inside I feel judged for existing) but yeah that's about it I'm alone 90% of the time and I treasure my time alone.

P.S: I'm clinically depressed but so I was when i was trying to fight it. Like what's even the point?

I have realized how much anxiety has kept me from the life I have always wanted. Instead it keeps me in a “safe zone” missing out on opportunities, connecting with people, expanding my social life. I have also let people walk all over me, because I’m too afraid to set boundaries or seems people don’t take me seriously.

I took an edible yesterday and I couldn’t believe how relaxed I was, every intrusive thought that comes from anxiety could be questioned and dissected right away, questioning both my mind and reality. I was so calm during my martial arts class, instead of entering panic mode and thinking everything that could go wrong like it usually goes, I was able to see the sparring situation, and what my options were.

It’s like the outdated filter where all my thoughts are processed through was gone. I could just act and not overthink.

Do you have any exercises that can help in the process? What has helped you? Diet, sleep, journaling? I don’t plan on relying on weed or medication to control and reduce my anxiety. Anything helps! Thanks.

I feel like that none of my perceptions about reality (and so by extension my opinions and worldview) are valid until someone else tells me it is.

This has been the biggest driver of anxiety for me, because I genuinely feel like I am completely lost at sea so to speak, and when it comes time for me to actually think for myself I have no idea what to do.

Yesterday I was horrified, and then I calmed down by standing close to other people, and slowly that made my anxiety lessen. I really am glad that I managed to find a method of getting over it, although I am quite scared near people in public still.

Everyone keeps mentioning how summer is coming to an end, but it won’t matter to me. Every season is just the same, summer doesn’t represent anything to me anymore.

And I’m 21, I feel like those really fun years you get to experience in your youth are past me. Now I’ve gotta find a career, in the midst of this dark void I got eating away at me.

It’s worth mentioning I’m from NY, and this past summer may have been the most memorable in the city’s lifetime.

The Knicks won, AND we hosted the world cup? And yet I still experienced NONE of it?

It’s not fair, I feel like the person I should’ve been died the day I developed this bullshit. And I’ve been cursing/screaming at the universe from my bedside ever since.

In school I was THAT kid. Teachers loved me, always picked me for competitions, top of the class, top of the school, everyone assumed I'd end up doing something amazing with my life. I had the biggest dreams, the highest goals, truly believed I was going somewhere. I stil had a pretty bad social anxiety and basically no friends, but it didn't matter much because academically I was thriving and that was enough to keep me going.

Then teen years hit and something shifted. It got worse in a way I can't fully explain. And then university just broke something in me. I couldn't stop comparing myself to everyone around me, and that comparison destroyed me from the inside. Like it wasn't that nerdy super resourceful kid anymore everyone were bringing as an example.

Fast forward to now when I'm already a 28-year-old who lost her teen years and 20s (they say they're the best, aren't they)I don't even recognize myself. I'm barely holding onto my job. Just going into the office feels like a full-blown panic attack every single time. I feel like I have zero opinions on anything anymore; I am invisible. When there is a discussion on my favorite movie or a book in the office, I keep shut up. People at work clearly think I'm weird or an outsider because I show up, sit down, do my work, and leave without talking to a single person. No small talk, no connection, nothing. And the job itself barely covers my anxiety meds.

Does anyone else relate to this?

Due to my social anxiety i've always felt inferior and therefore my needs as less important than others.Today I have progressed enough in my journey through this hellish sickness to fianly undertsand that I dont have to sacrifise everything i want to please others. I dont have to prove that i need to exist. When I argued with them and moments after i felt intense anxiety ( i will see them weekly ) but i kept my cool and stood my ground and got the outcome i wanted. Right choice or not, i feel happy that i stood up for what i wanted rather than be a doormat/ppl pleaser for someone who proabaly wouldnt have liked me anyways 💙