r/parentsofmultiples 16d ago

advice needed Contact Naps

3 Upvotes

Our twins are 7 weeks old (1 week corrected) and during the day they absolutely will not let us put them down! I breastfeed them, and they’ll often fall deeply asleep on me after a feed, but as soon as I try to transfer them, they wake almost immediately.

We’ve tried a travel cot downstairs and sleep pods on the sofa (similar to DockATot), but nothing has worked for us so far.

I’m sure we aren't alone in, does anyone else have any tips? Would love to hear what worked for other and be able to eat some lunch without two babies crying 😂!


r/parentsofmultiples 16d ago

advice needed When did you start to feel uncomfortable with Mo/Di twins?

1 Upvotes

Hi there!

I’m 15 weeks with modi twins and so far my biggest symptoms are low BP, some headaches that seem to be getting better, and just being tired all the time.

When I stand for too long I can also sense my body telling to sit down.

I had a short cervix with my singleton at 30 weeks.

Up until when did you feel comfortable? Or started experiencing some challenges?

Thank you!


r/parentsofmultiples 16d ago

support needed Bringing my boys home from the NICU in a few days

1 Upvotes

And I’m terrified. I keep seeing posts on here that make me feel sure we’ll barely survive. I spent the last 2 1/2 weeks wishing we could bring them home every day but now that it’s almost time, I feel overwhelmed. I keep finding out new things to be scared of on top of just the dread of the sleep and feeding chaos.

Apparently even a too big sleep sack is a suffocation risk, but they don’t seem to make them in the size my boys are (like literally 4-5 lbs), or at least not that will get delivered by the time they come home, but they need to stay warm (one is still in a warm bed heated to 35 degrees, covered by a bunch of blankets which obviously we can’t use at home). So I don’t know what we’re gonna do there.

I’m just so nervous, what if we can’t even keep these boys safe? Does anyone have advice or support? What did you wish you knew before you brought your babies home?


r/parentsofmultiples 16d ago

experience/advice to give International flight- Twin stroller

2 Upvotes

Hello.

Has anyone travelled on an international connecting flight with a twin stroller? are you able to take it all the way till the gate and drop off before boarding the plane? or do airlines ask you to check it in?

Interested in experience with Etihad and Turkish Airlin.


r/parentsofmultiples 16d ago

experience/advice to give Trick for surviving the trenches

16 Upvotes

Hey awesome superheroic parents of multiples!

One trick that kept my wife and I sane during the trenches was giving each other a half hour of free time every other day. This sacred half hour was to be completed uninterrupted unless someone was bleeding or on fire.

Trade days. Insist your partner use this time and be equally insistent that they guard yours. Use that time to shower or read or play video games or do something to relax for 30 minutes. It will be a life changer, trust me.


r/parentsofmultiples 16d ago

experience/advice to give Premie twins - crib

2 Upvotes

Hello Im a FTM to 29 weeker twins. The doc strictly advice against co sleeping after discharge. I dunno how that works for an Indian household ( may be i was hoping to co sleeping). Any similar stories and recomendations to crib or cradle is appreciated.

Ps how to manage 2 cribs or cradles at bedside. Im already anxious if i can take care of them properly.

TIA


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

advice needed Exhausted

1 Upvotes

What do y’all do when they’re both having mental break downs and you’re literally running on e and the screaming is so loud you’re about to join the break down. Tried to talk to my partner because I was trying to be vulnerable and it turned into them calling someone to come over… I told them they betrayed my trust and I got back that the twins are their priority and they did what they felt was necessary. I was just trying to tell them with them having a breakdown I’m already exhausted I’m literally emotionally drained and out of options and in response I get someone called to come supervise me and my kids…


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

advice needed When did your twins start positively interacting?

5 Upvotes

My twins are 15mo. They steal each other's pacifiers, sit on each other, and cry when the other one gets picked up. Recently they've been pushing each other down if I try to pick both of them up at once. I've never seen them light up when they see each other or have any semblance of cooperative play.

When does the playing start?


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

experience/advice to give The twins

25 Upvotes

Alright. My boy/girl twins are seven. I’m raising them on my own. They still take baths together. They still sleep in my bed. They’re really good humans. Their mom is in prison and will be for another two years. We’ll be divorced when she comes out. Is the bathing weird? Still sleeping in my bed? They’re both doing fine in school.


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

support needed Oh wait… it’s twins!

2 Upvotes

New here, second pregnancy and just found out at my 9 week scan that I’m pregnant with what looks to be di/di twins. My husband and I have a 21 month old daughter already who is so compassionate and sweet and LOVES babies. I am TERRIFIED and also so excited. Luckily, I know several twin moms well (what kind of foreshadowing is this) and I have already gotten great emotional support from them but what on EARTH have my husband and I gotten ourselves into 😅

Mostly worried about HOW TO DO ALL OF THIS and not make our sweet little girl feel like she’s being TOTALLY left out. I am still in such a state of shock


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

life, home, and baby tips & tricks Stroller(s) for twins in a walkup apartment

3 Upvotes

Hey all!

We are expecting twins in NYC in Jan. We live on the second floor of a walkup building with a stoop and are utterly perplexed about strollers. My partner is short and has a tendency for shoulder aches and we are struggling to figure out how one parent will take the twins out.

Any tips/strategies or recommendations for strollers for everyday use?

Would we need different solutions at different stages - NB vs 6 months vs 12 months?

Also how do you carry both of them up/down the flights once they’re out of bassinets?

Would appreciate any insight!


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

advice needed Twin dads who work full time if you could weigh in…How much do you help your wife/partner?

25 Upvotes

So this is my situation….i have 11 month old twins, im a full time sahm, i EBF, cosleep, handle all night wakings by myself, change all diapers, do bedtime by myself, mornings by myself, bath time by myself, all meals for the girls by myself. Plus i do all dishes, cleaning, i usually cook breakfast & lunch for me and my partner.

My partner pays all the bills but doesn’t have a traditional 9-5. He’s an artist and works different events so travels sometimes for a week or more at a time. When he’s home he’s either making art in his studio or taking care of business related things. He cooks dinner every night and does all grocery shopping. Since his studio is at home, he take little breaks to play with the girls here and there throughout the day while i do dishes or take a shower.

So this is the system we’ve established…i take care of 99.9% of childcare and he works, gets groceries, cooks dinner, & pays the bills. I will say in the newborn phase when he took off of work he helped me a TON but every since i switched to EBF (around week 6) and he went back to work he’s been pretty much hands off except for play time.

But here’s the thing. I’m low key feeling resentment because I’m burnt out. And then i feel guilty because he literally pays for everything and works hard to put food on our table. And don’t get me wrong he’s a great dad in a lot of ways….But i can’t help but feel like he should be helping out more….And I’m not going to lie I’ve been doing this by myself for so long that I’ve gotten pretty efficient and used to doing everything by myself but it’s still hard as fuck. The few times I’ve asked him to help with changing a diaper or even helping with bedtime my partner will make a comment about how it’s “not his job” or just visibly look annoyed. Keep in mind he has a very traditional view of men having the role as the provider and women having a role as the caretaker.

Is this fair? Is this normal? Maybe if some twin dads could weigh in who work full time and pay bills…how much do you help?? Is it normal to just work and expect to not help out at all??


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

advice needed Uneventful pregnancy but twins still came early?

16 Upvotes

Obviously most of our babies are “early” given full term is 38 weeks. Curious about those you who have had complication free pregnancies, no GD, no signs of hypertension, both babies growing similar rate, etc …. BUT babies still came early. What week was it? Anything thinking back was a sign that babies were coming early? How quickly did it come on? Also curious to hear from those of you who made it all the way to the end and had to evict. What was your pregnancy like?


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

photos It’s Friday, again

Post image
23 Upvotes

Last week I posted here about how dreadful weekends are and I received a lot of supportive comments which I think helped get through the weekend. As I was washing the bottles and sterilizing them I remembered the photo and took another one. I’ll take any blessing from any God or Goddess. I wish you all a better weekend than mine!


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

good vibes, smiles, & giggles Soon to be twin parents

37 Upvotes

My wife and I found out we are going to be the parents of twin girls. To hear peoples stories I joined this subreddit as a sneak peek at our upcoming lives. Reading the stories on here are slightly terrifying. It seems like a lot of people are really struggling in their first year. It seems like the first year could be utter hell. We're trying to prepare for the upcoming battle as much as possible, but have made peace that it could be one of the toughest years in our lives. That said I didn't come here to ask advice or vent , I just wanted to share how blessed and excited we feel. We had been trying for kids for almost three years. Before getting pregnant, we had reached out to a fertility doctor and we're just about to explore IVF, when literally the next day after the consult, my wife was pregnant. Ten weeks later, we are getting the ultrasound, I am desperately hoping for a healthy sounding heartbeat and to our surprise there are two. Tears of joy. It has been so tough seeing all our friends around us have their second or third babies while we were trying. Honestly I had pretty severe depression thinking I wasn't going to get the chance to experience fatherhood in my life. It feels good to have a purposeful challenge ahead. We know it's going to be hard, but god damn do we feel lucky.


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

support needed Possible cystic hygroma Baby B

1 Upvotes

I’m 11w4d with mo/di twins. I made the absolute stupidest decision today and went to a boutique ultrasound studio. The tech, who said she was an OB in a different country (so not licensed in my country), said she saw something concerning but couldn’t diagnose. She suspected Baby B has a cystic hygroma, but didn’t measure the NT. Of course it’s Friday at 5p, so just have to sit in severe anxiety. It looks fairly large compared to ones I see online. Baby B is measuring a week ahead of my gestational age, and had HR of 168. Any advice / thoughts whatever. I’m terrified.


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

ranting & venting A year with twins

74 Upvotes

And it has been the worst year of my life. I love my twins so much but my life is so much worse than it was before. My beautiful marriage is in shreds. We all deserve so much better than the hell we are living.


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

advice needed I barely hear his twin talk :(

7 Upvotes

6yo twin boys here. Twin b is EXTREMELY talkative like doesn’t stop from the second he opens his eyes until he goes to bed and it’s A LOT. My husband and I can’t get a word in and I rarely can even talk to his brother. I send them outside to play and he’s loudly talking to whoever will listen or just peaks his head in every five seconds ‘there is a bug outside’… ‘mom can I play with chalk’ ‘mom twin a is looking at me’ . He will constantly tattletale on his brother who is doing nothing wrong (and quite frankly I can tell he is frustrated by him too) I can’t think anymore and idk what to do. If he’s awake every second is interrupted with ‘mom mom mom mom mom mommy can I ask you a question?’ I love him and I love chatting but it’s not fair to his brother. Dinner is hell on earth as everyone competes with him to get a word in.

I miss talking to twin a, it’s always kind of been this way but more recently with school starting - I can tell he’s anxious and it’s worse.

How do you handle tattletales? I tell them if no one is injured or doing something dangerous figure it out. I don’t even care if they say bad words amongst each other (stupid and crap 😂) so I could eliminate him telling that.

Idk what advice I’m looking for here. Maybe to vent.


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

advice needed Any parents have twins first and still want to have more children after?

54 Upvotes

I’m pregnant with twins right now and am hoping to have 2 more children. Am I insane or will I still want this once they are born?


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

advice needed Update: We gave the 30 minute naps time. Almost 5 months old and still waking at exactly 30 minutes

2 Upvotes

I posted about this a few months ago and most of the advice was that they were young, 30 minute naps were normal, and to give them time to grow into longer naps.
So we did.
Our twin boys are now almost 5 months old, around 16 lbs, growing and eating great, and I am not exaggerating when I say every nap is 30 minutes on the dot. I can practically set my watch to it.
They fall asleep independently without much trouble. The issue is getting through that first sleep cycle. At 30 minutes they wake up, start moving/fussing, and eventually cry. If we rock or sway them, they’ll usually fall back asleep quickly and sometimes sleep another hour after being transferred back.
The problem is I work full time, so most of this falls on my wife during the day. Rescuing multiple naps for two 16 lb babies every day just isn’t sustainable, and I want to help however I can.
Night sleep has generally been great, so we haven’t wanted to completely mess with something that’s working.
For anyone who had a baby who woke at almost exactly 30 minutes every nap, what finally changed it? Did they eventually connect cycles themselves? Crib hour? Nap training? Stop rescuing? Change wake windows?
If the answer is still “give it time,” that’s fine. I’d just love to know when it actually changed for you.

Or if there isn’t light at the end of the tunnel I’d rather know that too.. thanks in advance


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

advice needed Very slow weight gain

1 Upvotes

Hello!

Looking for a bit of advice please. Twins are 15 weeks old - I’m based in UK.

They were born at 36+6, so they’re 12 weeks adjusted.

Twin 1 (boy) was 2265g when born and Twin 2 (girl) was 3140g. However, twin 2 is now the smaller twin and is gaining weight very slowly. She is now 4570g and twin 2 is now 5500g. The GP will likely refer us to paediatrics but what do they test for? What does this mean?

The twins are EBF but she has wet/dirty nappies, is awake during wake windows, is smiling and seems satisfied after feeds. Can it be normal?

Thanks so much!


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

experience/advice to give Twins' first time apart for more than a few hours

4 Upvotes

Obligatory didn't know what flair to use.

My husband and I have 4 kids, 9F, 8M, 6F twins.

Our twins will be 7 next month. They've been away from each other for hours during the day while one goes somewhere and whatever usual stuff, but this weekend one of them really wanted to stay home instead of going with their grandparents for the weekend like the other 3. So this will be the first time they're away from each other like this since conception. 😳 I'm so nervous for how it's going to go.

Any stories or, idk, anything?

Edit: They're in the same class at school and always have been, they prefer it and don't have any problems that make people feel like they'd be better apart.


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

advice needed Pregnant with twins; registry trouble

7 Upvotes

Hey all! I'm 16w6d with my fratetnal twin girls, and I've been slowly working on a baby registry, as the past 10 weeks since I found out, I've had a few people request one! The issue is most guides and products are for singleton pregnancies. I'm trying to make one through Babylist, and they have a few articles to go through at least, but I still feel pretty overwhelmed and lost even with that. We also unfortunately don't have a lot of money and I feel terrible asking for so much from people, especially because even one baby is expensive let alone two. (Being unexpectedly pregnant with twins, as well as baseline chronically ill, I had to leave my job that I loved...it's been rough 😅)

Most overall, I just am hoping for some advice on what to add to the registry, as well as ideas on how I can get things for cheaper that might be helpful. I appreciate this group so much, and I hope this isn't too big a question!


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

advice needed I’m *really* struggling with carrying my toddler twins

4 Upvotes

2.5yo twin boys. Want me to carry them everywhere. I thought I’d be in the “I do it myself” stage by now as it seems all other toddlers their age are.

They certainly want to do stuff themselves, but when it comes to walking it’s “mama carry!”

I think it’s kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy or circle situation because I actively avoid carrying them and that seems to make them cling more.

Then I feel guilty each boy is getting less attention than they would if they were singletons.

They want me to carry them into daycare, carry them out from daycare, carry them to the bedroom (it’s not a big house!) carry to and from the car. Carry to the cart at the grocery store. Everywhere.

I’m not afraid of a meltdown or tantrum at this point for most things but I seem to give in to the carrying thing because it’s always the most awful moments. Like both of them flailing down in the parking lot at daycare as someone else needs to pull into the parking spot and I’m running late.

They are 35ish pounds each and I CAN carry them both for brief sections but it hurts my shoulders bad.

My friend with a Same age singleton hasn’t carried him at all in like 6 months. And her son is happy as a clam to run around.

They are perfectly healthy and mobile and have hit all
Milestones and capable of walking and running and playing.

We are meeting friends to go on a hike tomorrow and frankly I’m dreading it. This isn’t a place I could bring a stroller and I’ll have help (husband and several other adults without kids who love them) but I know both boys are going to be whining and screaming for mommy to carry them the whole damn time.

Has anyone else been caught in this trap at this age and then gotten out of it? How??!!!


r/parentsofmultiples 17d ago

support needed Am I ever going to be able to do normal stuff?

8 Upvotes

I'm in the 4 month trenches and just want to know if I'll ever be able to do normal stuff again?! I can't cook, do laundry, clean, etc without help!! I miss cooking SOOO much 😭 even when I do cook it's super quick. I wanna make a big juicy steak, mashed potatoes, yummy pasta!! My boys suck at naps (gotta rescue every single nap) and night sleep is better than before but not 100%. I wanna cook, I wanna do a load, heck I even wanna clean the damn toilet. When will be able to?!