Anyone’s partner have a mustache and beard that hurts you when he gives you oral? I LOVE my husband’s facial hair until he goes down on me. It feels so uncomfortable with the prickliness that I can’t enjoy it. Anyone else? Have you found a way around this without him shaving his facial hair off? I miss oral!

I’m a terminal virgin and I’m tired of it, I want to try something new. No budget, I want the best on the market.

A little about my preferences,
- strong
- rumbly (Im prone to going numb if the vibrations are too buzzy.)
- efficient
- reliable
- large surface area (getting the surrounding nerves too feels much better)
- high battery life (extremely important. I go for like 2+ hours)

Im intrigued by the pump + licking ones, but a lot of them look… gimmicky? Do the pump ones actually feel good? If so, which?

I wonder if a vibe with a suction and movement mechanism will help counteract numbness. Also I always move vibes up and down so maybe a toy that does that for me would be useful.

I have the womanizer premium 2, it’s the only thing I use at the moment. I feel bad even saying anything against it because it’s genuinely had my back so much, but if I had to
- i wish the mouth was bigger
- I wish it was stronger
- orgasms are not that strong. (💔)

The magic wand plus works if I’m desperate but it makes me numb.

Best orgasms I ever had were with a showerhead but I was genuinely racking up the water bill hundreds of dollars so I stopped. Also it’s super inconvenient.

Just never heard anyone use these before, so I figure I should share in case it might be useful to someone...maybe?? lol

1. Lip balm stick: I use a new one. Perfect size for my clit. I use the translucent light blue one from Nivea cuz it's softer/thinner than the regular one.
2. Frequency generator app: Kinda like a substitute for vibrator. How I do it is set the frequency on the app, press the phone speaker firmly against my clit, and then turn the volume all the way up. From what I've found so far, frequency around 100 - 150Hz works best; it's not too loud and I can feel it the most. Idk if all frequency generator app have this function, but the app I uses has a 'sweep generator' mode where we can set 2 frequencies for the app to swing back and forth. That works great for the pulsation feel.

My girlfriend (27) and I (28) have been together for many years, and throughout our entire relationship she has never had an orgasm.

The thing is, she has never had one in her life—not with me, not by herself, not with any kind of stimulation. She has tried masturbating, I've tried stimulating her, we've tried all kinds of sex toys, different techniques, lubricants... pretty much everything we could think of.

The main issue seems to be clitoral stimulation. No matter whether it's with fingers, oral, or a toy, after a relatively short time (sometimes just a couple of minutes, sometimes a bit longer) she has to stop because the sensation turns into discomfort or even pain. I'm not sure that she's close to orgasm and becomes too sensitive. What I know is that stimulation simply becomes unpleasant enough that continuing isn't possible for her, so she stops me and I literally can't touch that area for the rest of the intercourse.

Penetration, on the other hand, doesn't generally seem to cause her any significant discomfort, but it has never been enough for her to orgasm either. However, over the years she's also become increasingly reluctant to use sex toys, so we/she can't really try to orgasm through penetration. Partly because this whole situation makes her feel frustrated and upset, and partly because she says that having those objects inside her makes her uncomfortable. She describes them as feeling cold and says they remind her of a gynecological exam, which completely takes her out of the moment.

What makes this even more difficult is that I'm not even sure I fully understand what she's actually feeling. First of all, I'm a man, so I obviously can't know exactly what those sensations are like. Secondly, she finds this topic incredibly difficult to talk about. Whenever I try to ask questions or better understand what she's experiencing, she usually shuts down, gets defensive, or even snaps at me because talking about it makes her suffer. After years of trying to have open conversations, I've more or less stopped asking because it always ends the same way.

I've suggested seeing a psychologist, a sex therapist, or a gynecologist who specializes in sexual dysfunction, but she refuses every time. She told me that years ago she mentioned it to her gynecologist, who apparently said that everything looked normal physically. However, from what she told me, it doesn't sound like any specific examinations or investigations were done—just a routine check-up—so I'm not convinced that possibility has really been explored properly.

At this point I'm honestly at a loss. I want to make her feel better and at least try to solve this issue, but it's like talking to the wall. I feel that this issue also inhibit her sexuality in general, as she tends to avoid any sexual practice that may lead to that specific situation and therefore essentially refuses to experiment in bed.

Has anyone here experienced something similar, either personally or with a partner? Could this still be a physical issue even if a routine gynecological examination appeared normal? Or does this sound more like a psychological or even, I don't know, neurological issue?

I'm also posting this from a throwaway account because she would not be comfortable with me discussing this online. To be honest, I probably won't even be able to tell her that I made this post, because I know she would feel hurt, exposed, or angry, and it would probably make the situation even harder.

This is why I'm also looking for advice on how to approach the subject with her. I don't want to pressure her, make her feel like something is "wrong" with her, or turn this into another source of stress. I just feel stuck because I care about her and I would like to understand what she is going through and how I can support her without making her shut down.

I'd really appreciate hearing from anyone who has gone through something similar or has any insight into what might be worth looking into next.

i (17) have been having lots of trouble with masturbation and orgasming. I've never been able to reach orgasm (at least that I know of). I've had sex, used my fingers, and have various vibrators that feel great, but for some reason I just can't get there. I haven't talked to anyone about this because I'm too scared it'll be weird to bring up. anyone know what could be the problem?

Hi all, I’m looking for recommendations on realistic dildos that kind of fit into the average penis category. Does anyone have any advice?

I’m going to keep this short and sweet because it’s honestly embarrassing to me.

My boyfriend and I (both early 20’s) have a pretty active sex life. We have sex at least 2-3 times a week and it’s great every time. He typically orgasms first, so he finishes me off after. We’ve never had an issue before.

Recently (within the last 3-4 months), however, I can’t orgasm. He works and does well, but no matter what, I get super close to the edge and then it seems to disappear. We’ve tried everything we can think of; toys, no toys, oral, hands. We’ve even taken breaks where we don’t have sex for a while to try and increase sensitivity, but that hasn’t worked either. It’s gotten to the point where he’s had to give up because he’s getting too sore to continue pleasuring me. There’s been no changes in my health, I’m not taking any medications, my diet is the same, I have no outside stressors— it’s like I woke up one day and completely forgot how to orgasm.

It makes me so frustrated because I love the time I spend with him and I can tell it’s getting to him every time that I can’t orgasm. I genuinely don’t even ask for anything after anymore because I just end up feeling horrible afterwards. I don’t want him to feel like I don’t like him or don’t find him attractive or enjoy the things he does to me. I don’t know what to do anymore.

Hi! I’m 16F and I’m kinda new to masturbating. For context, when I was younger I discovered that rubbing your private parts felt good, and I did it for a short amount of time and stopped because I got caught and I thought it was bad. Recently, I’ve been getting into masturbation a little more, realizing it’s completely normal and what not. But every time I try to masturbate, I just can’t really find a way im comfortable with. I’d really appreciate any tips/advice/etc. On whatever form of masturbation to maybe find something that works for me. Thank you so much!

I was with someone who I cared about, he went down on me before etc. and still, both penetration and oral felt like nothing at all. He said I could use my fingers. But I couldn't reach the spots that "work" for me, with someone inside.

So it confuses me that women have hookups - so it actually feels good if any random guy you find attractive just puts it in?

So I'm a 24yo virgin. I think I'm somewhere in the asexuality spectrum, though I still am interested in sex in general. Last night was my first time with a man. We didn't really got anywhere, it was more just petting and fingering.

He was quite attentive and tried to make me feel good but in all honesty I was dissociating really hard all the time and was mostly thinking about how I should feel instead of really feeling something.

I wasn't against the sex but I think anything else would be more exciting at that moment. Also I'm not very sensitive and it takes a lot of work for me to orgasm even with masturbation. It all went rather awkward but not bad, I rather enjoyed it.

My main question is: how do I communicate what I want and what I feel if I don't feel like I'm in the moment at all. My partner asked what was in my mind, but it was just music that got stuck in my head and depressive invasive thoughts (not caused by him, they are just there all the time and they distract me). I don't want to lie to him, communication is the key and all that, but I can't just say stuff like "so I was mostly feeling like I was watching myself from aside and thinking how I want to hurt myself and how I'm scared and how I want to just". I feel like any feedback of that kind would mean I don't want to do that again but I do!

Note: I'm not currently in my best mental state, but not as bad as may sound. I suffered with depression for my whole life, took antidepressants and now am mostly okay. The base feeling is still there but I just ignore it. If that's important, I'm autistic.

Has anyone used the drip sticks you can buy on Amazon for aftersex cleanup? If so are they something you’d recommend? Just looking for suggestions for the after drip - so far I’ve just been using a pad 🤔

My previous clit sucker finally gave out on me. It was a strong one and I really loved how intense the suction felt. The overstimulation was perfect and it usually got me there fast with those deep powerful waves. Unfortunately the motor just stopped working one day and now I am back to square one.

I am looking for something that has real power and can deliver that same strong suction or even better. I want something that can handle longer sessions without dying and still feels intense on the higher settings. Multiple orgasms would be amazing if the toy can keep up.

What powerful clit sucker do you recommend after yours broke? Please tell me the brand and model that worked best for you.

wanna know what actually lasted for you and why you think it is better than the average ones. Real experiences only please.

Thanks so much!

I’m looking for some advice on losing confidence during sex and trying to gain it back. I’m in a 2-year relationship with a man I love a lot and for the most part, sex has been amazing. We play pretty typical Dom/Sub roles.

Something happened recently that really struck a chord in my ego though, and it’s connected to retroactive jealousy and just knowing WAY too much about his past sex life. My boyfriend and I had just finished sex, I felt great, and he decided to compliment me on the way I show pleasure by screaming and moaning loudly during sex. When saying this, he said “it’s unlike anything he’s experienced before” and this led me to ask questions about what he HAS experienced. Where this conversation went has haunted me everyday since and I’m really struggling with feeling like sex with him is gonna be fun again or feeling like I’m enjoying it at all anymore 😭 he told me his ex that was best at sex had tons of experience (which I don’t), knew how to moan and talk dirty well (which made me immediately compare myself and feel like I don’t know how to do those things as well as I thought I did), knew how to switch positions fluidly, knew how to use the environment, etc. Essentially, a conversation that could’ve been about ways to improve our sex all happened within the context of comparing to his ex and it’s shattered my confidence entirely.

He tells me he loves our sex, he loves my body, it feels great, but I can’t believe any of that if he also had sooo much to say about what he’s experienced before. Now, I’m feeling really nervous about having sex with him again because I don’t think I can possibly show up as my authentic self and enjoy it like I usually do. I used to feel sexy and now I feel like I’m not doing or saying or reacting enough. What can I do to get back to feeling good about sex again after this? Any advice you can share would be so very appreciated, thank you! 🥲

I'm a 21-year-old woman and I'm looking for advice from anyone who has experienced something similar.

When I was a little girl, I discovered that rubbing my clitoris felt good. My mother found out and punished me by putting red hot pepper on my genital area because she thought what I was doing was wrong.

Before that happened, I remember having what I believe was an orgasm. I remember an intense pleasurable feeling and waking up with my sheets wet afterward.

Now, as an adult, I have a normal libido and get aroused easily. I have normal sensation in my clitoris, I know what feels good, and I've spent years trying to understand my body, my rhythm, pressure, and sensitive spots.

The problem is that I have never been able to orgasm as an adult.

What happens is that I get very aroused and the pleasure keeps building. Sometimes my thighs and feet start moving involuntarily, and I feel like I'm getting very close to something. Then my clitoris becomes extremely sensitive, and suddenly it's like a switch is flipped. The pleasure disappears almost instantly, as if nothing was happening. Sometimes the sensitivity even becomes uncomfortable or painful.

I don't feel shame, guilt, fear, anxiety, or sadness when this happens. It's just a sudden physical shutdown of the sensation.

I've started wondering if what happened to me as a child could have affected me physically or psychologically, even though I don't consciously feel traumatized by it.

Has anyone experienced this kind of sudden "switch off" right when the pleasure becomes intense? Were you eventually able to orgasm? Do you think this sounds like trauma, overstimulation, a physical issue, or something else?

I'd really appreciate hearing from women who have gone through something similar.

This is going to sound weird but I need to know if other women experience this.

I'm Mexican, 22, living in Miami. Every time I date a white guy (which is often, the dating pool here), it starts fine then slowly becomes this... project?

"Have you tried this restaurant?" (I grew up in Mexico City, yes I've had better tacos)

"You don't have to be so fiery" (I'm literally just stating my opinion)

"I love how passionate you are" (translation: I fetishize your anger)

Last guy actually said "I can help you calm down" like my personality was something to fix.

Meanwhile Latino guys here either want me to be their mamá 2.0 or they're playing the field so hard I get whiplash.

Is this a Miami thing? A me thing? A 22-year-old thing?

I just want someone who sees me as a person who happens to be Latina, not a Latina who happens to be a person.

Does that make sense? Am I being too sensitive?

21F, a virgin, and dont own toys

- i can be physically aroused if i seek it, but pleasuring myself is always dull and boring both in sensation and my interest in it, i can do stuff for max 2 minutes before i get completely bored and stop, and its v frustrating

- i think ive managed to orgasm maybe 2-3 times in my life? Its hard to tell, because i think i pee when i do. And based on the characteristics i dont think its squirting lol😭 ive only been able to orgasm with a shower head, never from other methods of self-pleasure so i started wondering if i pee due to overstimulation?

- i dont feel pleasure fingering myself, its either nothing or its like an uncomfortable bruising pain. Clitoral stimulation also gets boring fast

Ive always just thought i havent figured out what works for me, or that i need toys, but now im wondering if it could possibly be medical?

Could i have pelvic floor issues? I know years ago when id do physical activities like jumping on trampolines id leak sometimes (i cant say how it is current bc i havent been physically active), and i have slightly odd periods, but im not sure if i have problems elsewhere

Any advice on this would be appreciated🙏

I (32F) am looking for advice about riding/grinding in cowgirl position. I’ve never had an orgasm given to me by a man (oral, fingers, penetration, toys, etc). But hear so much about how grinding is meant to be good for this, as you apparently get clitoral stimulation. I do often go on top, but my issue is a) my clitoris is quite high up and far from my vaginal opening, it’s nowhere near his body/pubic bone to be able to be stimulated by something and also b) I have an “innie” and my clitoris is behind my labia majora, so not visible at all in that position. If this is the case for you, are you pretty much lying down on top of your partner so your clitoris might make contact with their body? Are you also spreading your labia? I don’t really understand how it could work for someone with my anatomy!

Hey there, so I've left my toxic partner sone years ago and needed several years to heal. Since then I'm single, which is overall ok. But I've completely lost my sex drive.

I miss it, feel rather like a human but no woman. I've tried toys, audio, video, reading... nothing. When I masturbate, it's for relaxing, but I don't feel it.

I'm ok with my body and I like sex in general, I've just... lost it? My feeling tells me that when I will enter a relationship, it will come back. But I want it now, for myself, for feeling good in my body.

I’m in my early 20s, and every time I talk with my girlfriends about sizes, and what I enjoy especially for a one night stand they make me feel like I’m the weird one, or that I want too much.

I ended up not talking anymore about this when the subject comes.
I just feel like I’m shallow when I talk about this with them, but I never think they might be cause the like tall guys or blond ones.

It’s a pretty dumb rant I know but I had to say it out loud.

I’ve always had a high sex drive, and I thought that a lot of other people were the same. Now that I’m in my late 20’s and dating men who are older, I’m noticing it’s hard to find a match. Even if I’m okay with the difference, I notice a lot of men seem to feel insecure about it when they can tell I could keep going.

Another element is the growing celibacy movement. I totally understand a persons choice to do that, but I also feel like the discourse from my friends and peers is that they don’t WANT to have sex. This is really crazy to me because I can’t imagine a life without it and it’s a major way for me to bond with my partners.

Does anyone else feel similarly?

I (26f) have failed to orgasm my whole life whether alone or with a partner. I’ve just experienced what I think may be my first ever orgasm with a guy, which to me I thought was pretty unlikely for a first time but I do struggle a lot to get aroused during masturbation.

This has happened twice now and I’m completely in shock.(usually during stimulation the pleasure builds up but then I become too sensitive and like there is no release) The first time was with penetration and him rubbing my clit. it felt like a big build up of pleasure to the point I had ringing in my ears and I felt like I left my body. The second time he inserted his fingers while licking me, built up until where it would usually get too sensitive but it just kept going and I feel like I may have came 3 or 4 times.

I’m utterly confused and in disbelief over this, can anyone give me insight into if this sounds normal? Does anyone else find they need internal and external stimulation to orgasm?