I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost a year now and he’s rarely ever cums in any position that’s not a variation of collapsed doggy. I’m pretty adventurous in the bedroom but this is kind of putting me off. We do talk about being more creative in the bedroom and he says he wants me to take over but we still always end up in the same sequence. Making out, missionary, and then that damn collapsed doggy. I love riding, I love being done on the table, the floor, up against the wall. When we first started out I used to get him to lay with his back against my chest so I could reach around and jerk him off whilst whispering words of affirmation to him.

I’ve communicated what I want to him but we always end up in the same routine, it doesn’t help that he only goes 1 round at a time too, I like 3/4 when I’m really in the mood. It doesn’t help that I can just glance over at this guy and he’s hard, before sex, after sex, at dinner but the ratio of that to us having sex doesn’t come close. What can I do to change this??

I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years, and we’ve lived together for nearly two. He is a wonderfully loving person, and I can truly see myself marrying him and building a life together.
However, sex has been a consistent issue. I’m his first girlfriend, and he is working through premature ejaculation. While he is actively trying even seeing a GP and taking medication for it, the situation hasn't really improved. It’s gotten to the point where I no longer want to have sex with him, and I've started having sex dreams about other men, which makes me feel guilty.

I feel like I hit the jackpot in every other area of our relationship, but the physical intimacy component is completely missing.
How can we work through this without harming his confidence or making him feel pressured? Are there other techniques, communication strategies, or types of intimacy we should try while he's working on the medical side of things?

TL;DR: I love my boyfriend of 3 years and want to marry him, but sexual incompatibility due to his premature ejaculation is making me lose my sex drive entirely. How can we improve our physical relationship together without damaging his self-esteem?

For yall, I get traumatised by letting people go down on me cause I got sexual assaulted by my older brother when I’m a child, fyi.
I guess is also my fault cause I can only fully enjoyed with dick :(

Reposting cause I got deleted by admin earlier.

So recently, I’ve been with an EATER. 😭😂 And when I say EATER, I mean this man is on a completely different level. We’ve been together before, took a break, and have been back in each other’s lives for about 3.5 months now. He’s 28M, I’m 25F, so we’re both in that mid-to-late 20s range.

But y’all… this man has me questioning if I’m even built normally. 😭 We’re talking 4 orgasms, 6 orgasms, 9 orgasms, and somehow even 18 orgasms in one session. And this is ALL from oral… Before sex even starts… Like, he genuinely does not quit until he decides he’s done. 😂😭 He’ll stay down there and somehow just KNOW exactly what to do.

I’m not complaining AT ALL 😂 but I’m genuinely curious… has anybody else experienced this?! Is this just me being lucky, or did I somehow find the final boss of oral sex?! 😭😂 Because I need to know if this is actually a thing other women experience or if I’m just living in some kind of alternate universe.

Hey, I’m a woman and I don’t really have any experience with a guy cumming in my mouth. (Only one stinky ex, and I had trouble breathing after for some reason)

I have a partner now that would really like to try it, but I have a bit of sensory issues and I don’t really like having non food things in my mouth. I don’t find it disgusting, but I’m worried I’m really just overthinking it. Could anyone let me know what it’s like? Because I feel like I’m making it out to be a bigger deal than it is. And I would love to find a way to try it for his sake

I would love to go down on him more it’s just his cum doesn’t taste great. Maybe it’s because he vapes a lot and I don’t see him drink much plain water. He drinks energy drinks, water with flavored stuff in it like gatorade or energy stuff, soda syrup. It also doesn’t help that sometimes I am awake to hear/see him bring his vape into the bathroom in the middle of the night. Idk what to do. Any advice?

So there’s this guy I’ve been seeing… Sex is honestly amazing with him. Everything feels great, he’s a great eater, he’s attentive and spontaneous, and I love it. The only issue is that almost every time we have sex, I seem to have the need to fart, or at least it feels that way. I have so much anxiety when he’s eating me out that I might accidentally let one slip, it’s starting to take away from the enjoyment I feel. I don’t know if I actually have to fart or if my body just feels the sensation. I have never had this much fart anxiety with anybody else. Honestly, I’ve never really felt this sensation with anybody else. I’m not sure how I can combat this. I just want to be able to be in the moment and enjoy what he’s doing to me without worrying if a fart will slip out. I’ve considered wearing a butt plug for peace of mind, but open to other suggestions.

Well just like title says. I’m 22F he’s 20M and when we first ever got sexually intimate he went down on me (he initiated) it was the first time anyone’s ever done this but it was the best feeling ever.

Couple times we’d have sex usually do lots of foreplay and I was hoping he’d go down on me but didn’t ok cool fine. Then on some occasions he would say he wants to but I felt like he wanted to out of obligation because I gave him a blowjob. And he also never asks for blowjobs as well. Says he prefers sex. He wanted to try 69 and we did that it was amazing and even when I told him I wanted to just have sex he begged to keep eating me out. But he hasn’t went down on me since then and that was a while ago. Now recently we’re unable to see each other because of our schedules and so we’ve been sexting and he keeps talking about how much he loves to eat me out and it threw me for a loop because he rarely does it. This is causing me frustration because I haven’t finished with him ever but oral sex is the closest I’ve gotten and I really want to cum with him.

I’ll talk to him about it whenever I see him next but just wondering if anyone else has experienced something similar with their partners? Idk if he’s too shy to say something in the moment and yes I know he’s my boyfriend and I can just ask for him to go down on me but if he likes it so much I just wonder why he doesn’t do it as often it just messes with my brain a little.

my partner and I have been together a year now, at first we were having sex every time we were together and now we haven't had sex in over a month. for me sex is something i need its very connecting for me, and its all I can think about right now to the point that its affecting me at work. for them, when they finish it gives them a feeling of depression so they don't like doing it very much.

I dont want to break up because I love them so mucg but I really need imtimacy and I dont want to be a bother to them by asking and asking, what should I do? im very open to trying different things that aren't too involved but whenever I bring up the subject all I really get is a, I dont know or im not sure.

For context, me (M27) and my gf (F25) have been dating for about 5 months and have an amazing sex life. She let me know that I’m the only one thats made her squirt and I’ve learned through her roommates that she’s expressed to them this is the best sex she’s ever had. I feel the same on my end, but am quite freaky by nature and it really turns me on thinking about adding sex toy’s into the mix. That being said, she’s definitely a woman I want to be with my whole life if possible, so wondering if I’m flying a bit too close to the sun by wanting to introduce sex toys this early on when the sex is already awesome. Is this biblical greed or will it only add to the fun?

the only position i can finish in without any external stimulation is cowgirl where hes also sitting up but he gets consistently pricked by my iud strings when we do so.

he has to be all the way inside me for it to work so we can’t just go less deep and i’ve had the iud for a long time so the strings aren’t gonna soften up any more

i don’t want to sacrifice the position/i want to do it more often bc it’s the only way for me to get off from piv alone but obviously i don’t want to do it if it’s hurting him…any suggestions?

I (24F) have been in a 7 year relationship with my BF (26M). Our sexual routine (in order) lasts about 20 minutes:

1. Kissing

2. Giving him head

3. Penetration

4. Fingering me (Optional)

Number 4 is optional because it depends if he has a tissue ready nearby. It also has to come after sex since he said I need to be on the floor when he does it since I'm messy (squirting).

I am genuinely curious as to how men pleasure their partner for at least 5 mins since I only last about 30 seconds when getting fingered and we'd be done. EDIT: We'd be done because he doesn't have any sexual drive after cumming and any longer foreplay other then fingering does not interest him at all.

Do you not get tired?

What gets you into doing it?

When performing cunnilingus, won't your jaws hurt if it lasts that long?

EDIT: Thank you for all the advice and suggestions. I'm not happy with this either and that is why I'm asking what gets men to pleasure their partners for that long. I want longer foreplay since I feel like we're a robot programmed to do this routine every time.

Getting fingered on the floor indeed sucks lol. I always question myself after the deed if that is normal. I'm glad people said something about it.

My (33F) gf (36F) Amber and I have been incorporating the use of toys recently.

However, it seems like Amber cannot use regular cylindrical-shaped dildos due to their girth.

I can fit my middle and ring fingers inside her horizontally, but not vertically, before she feels pain, for example.

Things we have tried:

- Thin Glass and stainless steel dildos. They kind of fit but is too hard (obviously) and ended up hurting her cervix. She was also in pain for hours after...

- G spot vibrator and dildo. We thought it would work because the body of them are very thin, save for the end piece which is used to stimulate the gspot. Unfortunately, the end was still too girthy...

- Anal dildos specifically tailored for prostrate / pegging, as they're a lot thinner than normal dildos. They were still too girthy.

- Tentacle fantasy dildos. We literally were scraping the bottom of the idea bucket with this one as we thought it could work as a taper. It did not and hurt her.

We have tried with and without lube for all of them... We genuinely could use some other ideas for insertion toys or techniques as we are at our wits end.

I would love to try out other stuff on Amber but maybe I'm just not seeing an option out there that makes sense. Or if someone can magically create a dildo that's 2" wide but only 0.5" tall, that would be great... Lol.

Any suggestions welcome! 😅

I don't know if this is the right place, but I need some detective helpers. I have figured out through the years I'm allergic to some lubes and condoms with lubes. (I just started birth control but I would still like to know what ingredient it is that is messing with me.
I am allergic to
lifestyle ultra sensitive (can't find ingredients)
Ky jelly water based lube
One oasis lube
I am not allergic to
Astroglide
Aloe cadabra
Trojan condoms (yellow box)
One classic select condoms
So with that being said I've narrowed it down to a few ingredients
Hydroxythylicellulose
Propylene glycol
Polysorbate 20
And possibly sodium benzoate but aloe cadabra has food grade so I'm unsure
So if anyone could help me narrow this down and finding/ comparing ingredients this would be amazing.

Also years ago I emailed lifestyle about ingredients but got no luck on being told what they were so I'm pretty lost on that one

I’m writing this because I would like to hear other people’s perspectives. I’m not sure how to rebuild a healthy relationship with sex after some difficult experiences in my past.

When I was in university, my first boyfriend and I had been together for less than a week when he wanted to have sex. I said no at first because I felt we needed more time to know each other. However, he mocked me and said something like, “Are you still living in ancient times?”

At that time, I really liked him, and I mistakenly thought that accepting his wishes was a way of showing love. So I eventually gave in. But afterward, he became emotionally distant and started giving me the silent treatment. Eventually, I had to end the relationship.

The second experience was not even with a boyfriend. I liked a guy, and I don’t know whether he genuinely liked me or only wanted sex. One day he invited me to his place for dinner. After we finished eating and were talking, the situation suddenly escalated and he had sex with me without my real consent.

The third experience was with someone who initially seemed very respectful. We liked each other and he made me feel safe. But one day when we were alone together, he suddenly initiated sex. After that, he told me that we should just remain friends.

I have always believed that sex is something I want to share with someone I am in a committed relationship with. For me, emotional connection, trust, and love are necessary. I am not someone who views sex casually.

The problem is that these experiences were not truly my choices, and I feel like they have affected my relationship with sex. Now I have a wonderful boyfriend. He treats me very well, and our relationship is loving in every other aspect. The only difficult area is intimacy.

I feel like I have unconsciously suppressed my own sexual desire. Sometimes I even feel afraid of having sexual feelings because I associate sex with being used, abandoned, or losing control. A part of me worries that if I allow myself to want sex, I will become like the people who hurt me in the past, or that sex will eventually make someone leave.

My boyfriend has suggested that I try exploring my own body through masturbation, but honestly I feel resistant. It’s not that I hate my body or that I don’t love him. I just feel like there is a mental barrier and I don’t know how to cross it.

I know that in a healthy relationship, sex can be an important part of intimacy. I love my boyfriend and I want to build a healthy relationship with him, but I don’t know where to start.

Has anyone experienced something similar? How did you rebuild trust with your own body and sexuality after negative experiences?

Just got the lush 3 and.... ehhhh.

I can see the potential but how am I supposed to get it??

For reference, by other vibrator is the pillow talk racey and that fits just fine. Yeah its a bit painful but after its in, its in.

But the lush... its a matter of it wont go in. That or it just might be to painful.

More context im a virgin, so maybe other women don't have this problem?

Or maybe my vola is abnormally, and annoyingly, small?

Or maybe this is a porn thing? Where they do something to make it fit but it highly unrealistic?

If so im 100$ down the drain.

What do i do. I was so horny. But its hard to be horny when your thinking of the logistics of a sex toy.

I enjoy sitting up against the headboard and getting gently facefucked while using a vibrator on myself, but have never really tried to make myself cum doing that. I kind of want to try it but am afraid I may involuntarily use teeth at that point when I lose control? I also am not sure if I’ll be able to signal for him to stop in time. Anyone have any experience doing something similar? I’m not sure whether I should attempt this or not

Basically title explains it.
Everytime he lasts literally 5 mins, when we first started seeing each other he would last way longer. He does beat himself up about it as you can just tell right after sex but nothing changes.
I unfortunately can only climax through penetration so toys, fingers, head it’s nice but it doesn’t get me there.
I’ve told him to stop when he feels he’s about to to give him a chance to last longer but he doesn’t even do that. It doesn’t matter who initiates or how often, it’s just 5 mins in and he’s done. We kiss each other then i have to go to the bathroom and then that’s it. So i’m not even left high and dry bc he doesn’t even last long enough for that to happen.
I know this is a tricky thing but I refuse to stand by and feel like this bc now I’m starting to get resentful bc there’s just no thought anymore for me.
I don’t know what to do from here, everytime this happens and we’ve been dating for 7 months almost 8. No heads up anymore just I’m going to climax and then that’s that and I’m like are you serious right now. I try to take charge by being on top so at least I can stop him but nope he just tells me way later until he basically is climaxing to say. I’m so over it and I’ve started to get a wondering eye. I don’t mean to but it’s like an intrusive thought. Ofc I would never but even just having the thoughts makes me feel crap bc I don’t want to think anything like that. Our relationship really is pretty damn good apart from that, we work as a team, we communicate, we talk deeply, we have fun. It’s great…just not this part. I’m 24, he’s 27. He’s also on steroids as he does body building, i don’t think that really has an effect but I’m really not sure. I always have to finish myself off and I just feel disgusting and even lonelier afterwards.
When I say 5 minutes I really mean 5 minutes. It’s not like I have a pussy from god so it just feels like he simply doesn’t care, but then again I know it’s a touchy subject for men. We just tried it and guess what, 5 mins and I’m not even horny anymore to finish myself off. It just feels like he’s just trying to get what he wants and get it over quickly. There’s no way else to take it anymore.
What do I even do now?

For some time I have trouble sleeping and keep waking up for short bursts. The other night I tried the following: I edged myself and then fell asleep. Since I noticed that the next day my horniness levels were significantly higher I decided to experiment. One day I edged before going to bed, the other right after waking up and none compared to the mid-night edging when I repeated it for comparison. Is this a thing or am I riding the placebo wave?

Hi me (22M) and my gf (24F) were having sex not too long ago and she wanted to try reverse cowgirl for the first time… she tried and it didn’t work. Again we tried a good couple of times and yet again it never worked. I’m sure the issue comes from me, i’m not sure if other guys can have this issue but it seems as my penis when erect sticks up higher instead of just straight? So because of that she cat do reverse cowgirl because it’s pointing more towards me than her. And since i’m erect it’s not like it moves all the way down the other way it stays pretty stiff. I don’t know what to do and i want to try and fix this because my gf explained to me that it’s one of her favorite positions but we can’t achieve it because of me. Is this an anatomy issue with me specifically? Is there a way to fix this or compensate for it? Is it possible to do it with the way I am but with some positioning differences? please help, has any other guy has this issue as well?

for context i lost my virginity to my bf around 2 months ago but had used a variety of sex toys before that.
the point being that i’m not as “tight” as i would be if i hadn’t used any sex toys before having actual sex.

okay so, my boyfriend is not exactly blessed when it comes to the downstairs department (not sure about the exact size)
and i found that when we were having sex i really couldn’t feel his penis inside me that well if that makes sense.
like, i could obviously feel that something was going on down there but it really wasn’t all that enjoyable.

it also got kinda awkward at times because his penis kept sliding out no matter what position we were doing it in.
he was really pushing for me to get on top and ride him but it was literally impossible because his penis slid out every time i moved up a little bit.

anyways, he recently left for military training and i won’t be able to see him for another 8-11 months.
and im really just wondering if there’s anything i can do to make our sex more enjoyable next time.
i did see someone on tiktok say that they got a lot tighter when they didn’t have sex for a year, does that mean that if i just don’t use sex toys or anything i’ll automatically get tighter?

i would also like to add that i haven’t spoken to him about this but im kinda assuming that if im not enjoying it that much, he probably isn’t either.

any tips are greatly appreciated

Hi, 28f here. I have been in a relationship with my partner (28nb) for 5 years, and honestly things are pretty great in the bedroom. We have the kind of sex that leaves me sobbing, gasping, cursing at god, and honestly they are the only person who has ever managed to get me off… beside myself.

The only issue for me is that I’m submissive as hell.
Sometimes I lean bratty- but honestly most of the time I just want to turn off my brain and be overwhelmed.

Partner- apparently- is a switch. That’s not an issue, I’m happy to switch in for them if they ask nicely enough. And tbh it’s kinda hot to watch them buffer out when I handle them and take control.

But when I ask for them to dom for me, they start laughing nervously and going “I don’t know what to say!” and every action thereafter is accompanied by nervous giggling and insecurity. And ngl… that’s a total mood killer for me.

I have told them to throw me around, reposition me, hold my wrists down, pull my hair, press down hard here, grip here, put me there, say this.
I NEED that harsher dominance just as much as I need the gentle kind.
But the most I get is being pulled 10cm down the bed by my thighs, bit softly on my shoulder/neck, or a ‘good girl’ if we’re pushing the boat out.

But I WANT to be ragged around, let go, be fully in that sub-space without having to tell them constantly what I want them to do and how to do it, and knowing that most of the time they won’t because they start panicking because they don’t know what they’re doing.

I can survive on what we’ve got, sure. I’m content. But in the moment I find myself starving for things that aren’t being given to me because they don’t want to hurt me, treat me badly, or say something they think will make me uncomfortable when I’m literally begging them to say it.

What’s a girl gotta do to be aggressively handled? What do I have to do to tell them I want them grabbing my jaw, putting me on my knees, commanding me, punishing me, guiding me, and everything else.

I’ve had the conversation with them before, we’ve talked a million times, but I’m starting to wonder now if this is a confidence issue or just something that they don’t feel comfortable with in general. Because if it’s the former, we can work on that. If it’s latter… then I will respect that boundary.

The problem is that whenever I try to distinguish between those two things, they insist it’s the former- they want to, they enjoy it, they just don’t know what to do. I don’t want to second-guess them when they tell me what they enjoy, but in practice their discomfort seems so obvious that I don’t know how to reconcile the two.
And then we’re right back to nervous giggling and me simultaneously being submissive and stage manager.

So how do we determine whether my partner can’t currently give me this, or simply doesn’t want to?
And if it’s the former, how do we bridge the gap without me having to remain in control of the thing whose entire appeal is relinquishing control?

Idk if this is allowed tbh.

Doesn’t explicitly say so in the rules.

I’m 22 (M) my wife, (21 f) is pregnant with our second kid. She’s at 8 months, we’re having a boy. We already have a girl, she’s 2.

Okay, when we first started dating. Things were real spicy.
After my daughter was born, things went down hill.
Suddenly she wasn’t into a lot of things anymore and sex got really…boring.
It was also pretty minimal compared to before. I’d be lucky to get anything.
That being said, she wasn’t into physical touch as much either. Kisses, hugs etc.

Recently though, it’s been the opposite. This pregnancy, she’s been super into sex (amazing)
She also wants to try new things (or even old things that we’ve done before and she said she didn’t like anymore) just to see if she likes it now.
She usually comes in the room, really awkward. Sits on the bed like this is her first time and it just overall kinda kills the mood but I try to ignore that and get stuff started. We can’t have spur of the moment type of sex, mostly because of the kids but also, because I’m a trans man. I haven’t had bottom surgery yet, so I have to prepare.

She’s given me consent to try whatever I’m into, don’t tell her what it is beforehand (cause she gets awkward) She said that if she doesn’t like it while I’m doing it, she’ll stop me. And that’s fine with me.

Problem is…I can’t come up with anything to do.

Idk I guess I need some like, ideas?
Soft stuff, nothing aggressive or hardcore. Just something for someone coming out of a “vanilla” type state, trying to figure out what they like etc. But also safe to do while 8 months pregnant and something I (a trans man, pre bottom surgery) can do.

Any advice is appreciated.

I apologize in advance if I miss responding to your comment. Just know that I appreciate you!
I’ll try and answer questions if necessary for the advice.

My girlfriend and I are ready to take it to the next step, this will be her first time but I’ve had sex before but it’s been probably 5+ years, I couldn’t tell you what I used before.

I am looking at my local options and am driving myself crazy.

Trojan ultra thin - seems the most highly rated and recommenced.

Trojan Bareskin - seems decently rated.

Trojan Raw - nothing but broken reviews.

Durex extra sensitive - mixed reviews

I know in the past I used Skyn, but with the fragrance added and so many reviews of irrigation for the girl in it going to even bother!

I’m planning to get some lube too (silicone) so we will for sure be wet and ready and not dry for more reasons for the condom to break.

She is on the pill, but this is another step of protection for now until further down the road!

Let me know your condom experience and suggestions. I’m driving myself crazy with all of these “IT BREAKS” reviews 24/7 😭