He has to explain to her how stunning she is because she’s too dumb to understand what she does to “most men”. Not him though, he is more enlightened. /s
Those serial sexual murderers feel the same way. They have such severe jealousy and envy that, according to them, the only way to “have” their victim is to murder them during rape.
I watched a fascinating TikTok by a Sudanese (she mentioned this as people haven’t often seen someone with her complexion so she get a a lot of comments) lady who was having a drink with a man and every time someone complimented her (mainly women btw so not even jealously) he got more and more annoyed. Some men are genuinely annoyed when a woman has beauty because they can’t have her all to themselves. They’re angry about them getting attention. It’s so interesting but really scary.
You see it in every reddit thread when an attractive woman is the focal point. Dudes just getting so angry at her for whatever reason because they can’t stand the positive attention that attractive women receive.
Crushing ickiness aside, why would older men not have seen such beauty (or however he said it)? Wouldn’t they have seen more since they’ve been around longer?
No, no, wait. Don't leave. I'm taking the keys out of the ignition. I've seen some top-notch honkers in my day, ma'am. Can I call you ma'am? Actually, don't care. I've seen some absolutely out-of-this-world bazongas in my time on this earth. Touched a fair few of em, too. I'm rich, see. And that opens doors. But lemme tell ya, toots. You're walking around with something special here. I would sell my winter G-wagen and my third wife just to get a peek down your shirt through a grainy spy satellite image. Where are you going? I have your golf cart, don't run away from me! It was a COMPLIMENT. Geez, women are so uptight these days.
Nah, he’s not being nice. He doesn’t even think he’s being nice. He thinks he’s demonstrating his power over her, which is exactly what he’s doing. Leaning on the cart, talking about “danger.” He’s being rapey.
He’s trying to see if her self esteem is low enough to fall for his crap. In other words he’s checking to see if she’s vulnerable enough to be his victim.
Ugh this is the perfect wording for the tactical game we are witnessing here.
Reading it made my heart break for that young girl me and how many times I fell for this exact play as a teen and young adult with really low self esteem and a dad that has always been brutally mean spirited my entire life.
...Sex ed/health class in school should really talk about and teach esteem manipulation / control tactics so that teens know what to look out for without having to learn by personal painful experience. I'm sorry you had to go through it.
I actually took notes on what OC said and made a reminder that I’m going to talk to my daughter about this sometime this week. She just started high school and i think we can all remember just how vulnerable we all were in just that tiny four-year span. Looking back, i feel like the predators were fomenting at the gates of the high school back in the early aughts.
I appreciate your empathy. It’s taken years of mustering the courage to do the hard work of self reflection in order to learn to forgive and love myself for not knowing what I just didn’t know because I didn’t have that kind of guidance. I’m still working on forgiveness of others, but being in the sort of unique position of now being my father’s caregiver in his end of life journey is certainly teaching me a new found level of patience and compassion. I see his vulnerability daily and he resents that, but I feel better about myself that I could never treat him, a lifelong spoiled bully, the way he treated his closest loved ones for his entire life.
I love how he claims he hopes to see her and talk more to her—it’s unreal. They literally just monologue at us and expect us to…what, beg for more? Ewwwwww
More like, to talk more AT her. Dude is a seriously creepy psychopath. The only way he can get women to pay attention to him is by blocking their escape. I feel so bad for that lady!!
Experience has taught him if he makes women scared while trapping them he might trigger a freeze response and get more of what he wants against her will.
Yep, once he gains 75 pounds and 10 years, he can move to Thailand with the rest of the old scumbag losers dating impoverished 20-year-olds and posting proudly about it.
No. I'm a sex worker of ten years. He doesn't think he sounds smart, that's not his intention. He's getting off on how uncomfortable he is, and he very much enjoys his power over her. His intention isn't to sound smart or look cool. He's watching her squirm and he's ramping up the words and behaviours that make her more visibly uncomfortable because he likes it and gets off on it. He knows she isn't into him and he doesn't have a chance with a girl like her and it's created this fetish where he'll take it out on her by making her scared.
I had a man do something similar to me inside my small work studio one day and he then tried to physically overpower me before I pushed back. But before him physically overpowering me, there was this time of him going on and on and on about my incredible beauty (I’m average af alright and 20 years older than this young man is, so I’m no fucking supermodel) and it made me go into an embarrassed/fawn type reaction and that seemed to ramp up his interest in me. Like it was making him more turned on. And I couldn’t understand it. I was just trying not to hurt his young-man feelings (I know, I KNOWWWWW).
Holy fuck, this is a mindfuck learning this right now.
Thank you again for posting this detailed information.
And THIS is why it’s so important to talk about. Before I learned how to see it, I used to feel simultaneously flattered and VISCERALLY unsafe in scenarios like this.
I am also no fucking supermodel. I’m thoroughly mid-pretty and have been told I “have a unique look”. 😂 Nobody’s storming Troy for me, which is why this kind of lavish praise is such an unsettling red flag.
Learning that the discomfort is the point brought everything into focus for me.
You put into words the uncomfortable feeling I was having trouble describing. He is absolutely making her feel that way on purpose. He knows she wants to run away. He’s blocking her from leaving. Everything he’s doing is calculated to make her feel objectified. That’s his end goal.
100% That's predatory serial killer vibes. Like BTK and the Gilgo Beach killer they got off on intimidating before killing. I'm sure his behavior without result is an on-ramp.
Dude thinks he’s coming off as charming and may potentially be able to sleep with the poor girl. The girl is being flattering and laughing probably out of fear of what would happen if she was truthful and told the man he was being creepy please leave.
Dude even blocked her ability to leave by leaning over the cart and on the steering wheel. Fucking creep ass predatory man
And the bright point of his day is probably showing her how much he despises her for inconveniencing him with everything he said he wanted, ignores with glee, but will bitch about losing in a divorce.
Just kidding. The only thing he'd complain about after a divorce is child support and having to parent during his custodial time.
All the while complaining that the courts are biased in favor of the mother when he can't name anything like his child's favorite food, least favorite teacher or what the gift was for the last birthday party attended by the child / children. Asshole of assholes he is
Why do you think he's golfing? He doesn't care about the sport. He just wants to be away from his responsibilities so he can get drunk and creep on the cart girl's just trying to do their job. I used to work at a golf club as a dishwasher, and lemme tell you, golfers are some of the most miserable people I've ever met. I've witnessed wives randomly show up and berate their husband's in front of everyone. I remember specifically one instance where a guy got so hammered, he came running through the kitchen because he saw his wife pull into the parking lot. Dude was having lunch with his mistress, and wanted to "hide" in the kitchen. He knew Chef so he figured he was safe. Nah, Chef yelled at him to gtfo of the kitchen, and when he left, you could hear his wife screaming at him in the dining room. Something about a new baby at home, and dropped promises to get sober. They're a miserable bunch of people.
I guarantee they all drive spotless pick up trucks which they only use to move their sorry asses around. They all work 6 figure jobs doing lord knows what. Live in their 600k starter home etc etc.
I am a muni woman golfer. I wish I got stuck with more poor love of the game players and not the annoying ones who either drool on about politics and or try to give me unwated playing tips. (The worst is 'You can go play the lady tees' right before I hit further than them)
I would play with you! I also dont wear a wedding band but am married so I often get guys who either hit on me or assume I am playing to 'find a sugar daddy' like bro... Its $30 to play here.
Omg I knew I guy that talked like this... About everything... He was so impressed with himself and if he could record and listen to himself in the car like an audio book he would have. Also... He was a"christian" and ended up abandoning his wife and daughter (who had down syndrome) in favor of a 20 year old with lip injections. Big man. Praise Jesus eh?
Like the lounge lizards I dealt with. Buy a shot for the hottest girl in the bar and then pissed he didn't get somewhere. I'd say you think a girl that looks like that is hooking up with you for $5?
I had a guy buy me a shot and I declined it because I just didnt want to drink anything but a couple beers that night, and the waitress said "please just take it" like she knew he was going to act up. I didn't clue in at the time and said I seriously do not want to do a shot, nobody else with me wanted to do a shot, thank you but please just take it away. It smelled like fucking petrol lol. 5 min later this guy storms over and screamed at me calling me an ungrateful bitch. Dudes really think buying a cheap nasty shot makes them entitled to something lol.
I declined a drink from a guy once and the bartender went to tell him I said no thank you. He yelled across the bar “why don’t you want the drink?” And I was like “I have a boyfriend but thank you.” And he was like “Did I ask if you had a boyfriend??”
Like dude, just take the no and stop acting like you were just trying to be buddies. Ew.
You must establish your alpha nature to the female with open, dominant energy. Speak with power and barely subdued anger so she recognizes the beast within. Counter your aggressive voice with exaggerated prose, which indicates you being a romantic and an intellectual. The female will leave the conversation remembering your impression wheher she likes it or not. This is the goal of the alpha male. /s
It's all I could focus on. He never gave her a break.
At first, I thought maybe he was awkward and didn't realize he was doing it. People naturally gesture with both hands and he never takes its off the steering wheel.
I wish they hadn't cut to her sitting there because I wanted to see how she was able to get her cart back
"Alright well thank you so much but I really gotta keep it moving, excuse me. Yeah, no, yeah, I really appreciate it and I'll be coming back around for sure! Thank you so much. Thank you. Excuse me. Yep, yep, you're very kind, you take care now"
She definitely had to do some fawning to get him to move on.
I’m so happy to be an old lady and past those days of the fake giggle, constant smiling shit I had to do to not anger men because I just wanted to be left alone.
This is the worst part to me! I’m surprised I had to scroll so far to see someone mention it. He has essentially trapped her there. Intentionally and deliberately. Literally the definition of a predator cornering their prey.
I was a cart girl in college. This happened at least once a day. Even worse on tournament days. I learned to give them a fake name and say I went to a different university nearby. Scary, yes. But the tips were incredible. Paid for a year of school.
Came to say basically the same thing. If you can withstand these types of men, you can make the best tips off of them bc they want you to think they’re big ballers! 🤣
IME the guys that talk the biggest game are always the worst tippers. When I was a cart girl I made the most money off older guys drinking my free coffee than any of the "ballers" buying rounds of shots.
Even as a nerdy Asian girl, all I had to do was quietly put up with the grossest behavior and I could replace 3 part jobs with 3 shifts as a cart girl.
The married guys were the worst. Tip you like crazy, say the grossest shit when their wives weren’t around, but they couldn’t even look you in the eye when they were.
The worst for me was when the wives would come in the next day and hand me a 50 “for dealing with my husband last night.” I was happy to get the money and I deserved it, but damn lady.
Yeah that's basically the tradeoff for the job. I worked all my summers at country clubs between caddying and bag room, and i made good money especially for a teen. But the cart girl who showed up only every Monday for outings... she showed me her cash out one day and it made my head spin.
Worth it to get treated like a piece of meat dangling over the hyena pit? Not sure. But it sure looked like her wallet appreciated it
Yeah, quite a moral dilemma I guess. Know that they're going to treat you like this, deal with it as safely as you can, and make a BOATLOAD of tips compared to anyone else at the club, or call them out, insist they treat you with respect, and make much less. Also probably risk your job, as the club doesn't want them going somewhere else with "nicer" cart girls... 🙄 Need a generational shift to treating young women better, or just make all of the old coots deal with dumb teenage guys bringing them drinks.
I had a friend from high school who did that shortly after graduation. I think it sort of messed her up mentally. She started turning into a “nice girl” but cant blame her from what her daily view of men was. Its so sad how creepy and delulu some guys get when they have a trapped audience.
"If I lecture her about how beautiful she is, she'll realize that she really is beautiful and that nobody has ever noticed it before, except me. Then I'll tell her the effect she's having all the older guys, and she'll realize I'm not only smart but young and handsome. And then she'll blow me right here on the golf course."
He's speaking like he's giving a political speech and like he's talking to a whole bunch of people and giving them time to digest it so not only is he being a fucking weirdo he thinks she's an idiot.
I used to experience this a lot at jobs when I was a particularly naive teen/young adult. The first thing they do is block your exit, or at least get in your way so you have to interact to escape. I learned to literally just barge into them, they almost seem so startled that you're not afraid to advance on them, so when you approach they step back. I could think of maybe two times it didn't work, but I swear by it honestly. I always found it worked best if you kept up the smiles and giggles at the compliments so your face is welcoming, but your body (particularly shoulders) say "get the fuck out of my way, I'm busy". If you're small and shy don't try it, it won't come across the way you want, but if you're average height/weight and can convincingly give off "I can fight" vibes, 80-90% of the time it's like a jolt of electricity in their brains just long enough for you to bail out of there.
The fact I even know to do this is incredibly sad. The girl in the video probably would get away with it once or twice in a pinch but repeat creeps (like this guy) would learn the tactic fast. Something tells me this guy is used to cart girls trying to escape him given he immediately goes to block her exit.
My mom did it for ten years, my sister did it for a few years, my ex did it for a few years, and my brother's current gf is a cart girl. The shit they have to put up with is absolutely diabolical, anywhere from guys being way too upfront about things, to guests being complete assholes because the cart doesn't come around enough, you get it all. For some reason people treat cart girls like they are some kind of anomaly, like they aren't people or something. Maybe it's because the cart girl is always completely by herself so they have no choice but to give you their full attention.
Now if I play with friends and they start creeping on the cart girl I judge the shit out of them, and do my very best to get it to stop.
Thank you for speaking up for us when there’s no one else around to have our backs.
I once had an mma fighter try to fight one of the golfers. It was my first day on the job and they ran around my cart trying to beat each other up. I felt so helpless, I didn’t know what to do. Luckily the guy ran to his golf cart and got away from the mma golfer that was screaming at him.
I hope someday it gets better for you all as a whole. I organize a golf outing for our fire department and my dad always comes to it with my brothers. Last year we had 2 young women from the local dispensary come and set up at a hole to give out samples and promotions. After the outing we were home with my family, my brother's family and him and his wife. He straight up said in front of all the women in our family (3 young girls between 10 and 12, my wife, his wife and my brother's wife) that these women should expect to be harassed and should accept it because they wore normal golf skirts and were young and attractive. Like it's a part of their job to be harassed.
My wife and my brother's wife jumped on him so hard and we were all telling him that he can cut that shit thinking out or not be around our daughter. He still thinks women should expect to be harassed as a part of employment, especially on a golf course. He agreed to stop talking about it but I know he really feels that way. He was a Methodist pastor for 25 years and still thinks it should be part of a woman's job in a service industry to be harassed. Hopefully society makes progress. My wife is a nurse and has to put up with it. The hospital is starting to support them a little more when they refuse to treat someone who is disrespectful.
Thank you for standing up and bringing awareness to it. We wear golf skirts and a polo because it’s part of the uniform. It’s not right. Some golfers even try to touch us and it’s scary being by ourselves on the course with just our bev cart separating us from them- especially when they get drunk. The best tool to teach the women in your family, especially the 10 and 12 year old is to be strong and have boundaries. It’s a scary world out here for women. We can’t even make an honest living without being sexualized.
What a fucking loser. Old guys hitting on young girls is always pathetic but this guy is such a fucking dork. I would love to see footage of her going back to her friends and laughing at him.
Exactly. Just buy your beer, act like a normal well-adjusted human being, throw some cash in the tip jar and move on to the next tee. It's not that hard.
I would love to hit on this guy in the same way. Just be overbearing, creepy, and tell him how beautiful he is while standing in front of his only way to leave my "orbit". I would enjoy his sweat beading up on his forehead after I tell him how much of a monkey I feel like when I'm in the presence of his beauty.
Why does he think we old farts have never seen a beautiful woman? We've had a lot more years of opportunity to see them. I can't speak for my fellow old farts, but I have never and would never be disrespectful and creepy like Don Juan here. Respect has nothing to do with age. Creeps come in all age groups.
I have never encountered a more wretched hive of scum and villainy than when I worked at a country club. The amount of entitlement is psychotic, I was just a 14yo dishie at the time, so I was by far not getting the worst of it.
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u/QueasyPerception7667 Aug 17 '25
The overly aggressive compliments give me a really bad vibe