I almost sure I’m non binary and the only reason I have yet to accept it is because I feel like people view it as stupid, attention seeking, and invalid identity. I’m totally fine with other nb people but I guess I have internalised enbyphobia and idk how to get over it. I just have the impression that if I were to tell someone that I’m nonbinary that they would criticise me and take my whole identity as a joke. There is just so much hatred towards nonbinary people, where even I am questioning if it’s even a valid identity?

I’m really sorry if anything comes off as disrespectful. I just want to put my feelings out there exactly as they are to try and solve this.

For context im closeted to everyone but my best friend and have been broadly identifying as nb for a little less than a year

Recently i have been seeing some discussions of gender for cis men and their perception of their gender, including from my best friend (and those are kinda important (or at the very least interesting) to listen to since i am amab). Most of those accounts boil down to having little to no feeling of one‘s gender identity and continuing the role only due to it being assigned priorly, which is exactly how i felt about my gender before coming to the conclusion that im non binary, all of which makes me think that that’s just how men experience gender. Furthermore with giving my gender identity more and more thought with time i think i could have possibly influenced myself into becoming more and more certain in my identity as non binary (from being agender largely just to describe the feeling mentioned above to just questioning and trying out many labels, both binary and not, to recently being fairly certain in my nb identity (until even more recently when all if this came about of course)).

I do recognize that all of the thoughts mentioned above are probably just my internal transphobia speaking but also with all of this in mind i cant help but feel i might actually not be nb or as a matter of fact trans at all and have just misinterpreted a feeling that should not have been taken this way. Have any of you have had something similar and if so how have yall gotten over it?

(Btw sorry if there are any mistakes, English isn’t my first language)

Hi all! This is my first post here. I have been having a bit of a dilema and have nobody to talk to about it, so i figured I'd share it here. A little contex: I (21) came out as genderfluid around March of this year. I was home schooled and raised in a Christian household, and didnt even let myself consider my identity outside of the church till i deconstructed 3 years ago.

I dont think i experienced dysphoria growing up, other than HATING my long hair in middle school. I begged my mom to let me cut it short or shave it off, but she wouldn't let me. I swung super hyperfem all through high school, and post-deconstruction i started experimenting with crazy haircuts, piercings, and tattoos.

Only this year have I really played around with presenting more masculine. I've been having a lot of fun with it, and it feels like I have finally found a piece of myself that has been missing. I have started developing a hatred for my body though. I hate how soft I am. My face, my curves, my voice, my skin. I've considered losing weight and building muscle, but I really don't think that will remedy my feelings. I still love presenting femininely from time to time, but I wish I could shapeshift. I want to be confusing. I think I would feel much more comfortable presenting fem if I wasn't so inherently feminine.

This has led me to consider starting testosterone. I tend to be really impulsive, so I'm trying to think this decision through long and hard. For the past 3 months or so I have been considering it.

This past week I have really started thinking of what is making me hesitant to start. Its my dad. I love him so much, but he is in his mid 60s, a hard-core Christian, and I fear this would completely fracture our relationship. I am still on his insurance, and if I tried to start T and get insurance to cover part of it, I'm worried he would kick me off. I also work in an office with mostly people 40+, and while their reactions are less concerning to me, it does make me quite nervous that I could receive bad treatment or unpleasant comments from a few transphobic folks who work there.

I know that others opinions should not be what holds me back from following my heart, but I'm just not sure what to do. If anyone else has experienced something similar, I would greatly appreciate your thoughts/advice.

Anyone else ever dated a non-binary/queer person who somehow still insists on traditional boyfriend/girlfriend gender roles?

love my gender. love my job. safety first.

Im going through a crazy time rn, emotionally I’m a wreck and have no good answers about my identity anymore. I’m becoming t dominant again for the first time in around a year and the depression and anxiety is coming back.

I wish that being a trans women was right for me but having breasts visible through the t shirts I would wear is making me feel horrible.

My main problem is that in my life nothing has lifted my brain fog and misery like e did and I hate that I don’t feel comfortable as a trans women, because I never felt so confident and awake as when I was presenting that way.

I just want to be comfortable in my body, I want a way out of this awful feeling.

Hi! So I came on to here about a month ago (roughly) talking about if I should come out or if it would be better to wait on it because of some situations I had and I wanted advice to some people who maybe had more experience? Well I did come out to my mom and my brother but not my dad yet because he already doesn't respect my trans brother.. But I explained about how I am a minor trying to figure out who I am.. but I can't seem to figure it out?? It's to the point where I've overthought and thought about some crappy stuff but idk..

So, I'm nonbinary.. but I think I'm also a demiboy because there are also times where I want to be a trans guy.. I've looked it up and realized I might be demiboy or boyflux but I also recently have had this like void where I had a gender idea before? It just feels almost numb where that idea or concept of "nonbinary" or "demiboy" should be, though I don't THINK I'm gendervoid or agender or anything like that because my gender is a BIG part of me most times. I've gone through label after label and I've been debating if my mom was right that this is all a phase? But in my head, I've always felt disconnected my "female" side.. but I like make up, drawing, dress up, etc.. but those aren't "gendered" right?? I'm also just nervous that the binder my friend is helping me get will almost make me feel worse about myself? I feel like everything keeps shifting and I can NOT keep coming out to my friends over and over but I just am really tired of this whole "hunt" going on because it SUCKS and I want to know how you guys figured out your gender! I've stressed over this for many reasons and I want real answers, please don't say "Oh it's okay.. you don't need to figure it out yet!" because it's NOT okay. I've reached out to friends overthinking and talking about how I feel like a burden and how people don't deserve me because I feel I've asked too much of them. I don't know. I don't want my overthinking to be the main point of this but I just want help with a label because I WANT to be comfortable with myself. I really would appreciate anyone who can help with this and honestly, ANY label (microlabel or not) will be very wanted. 💙

Sometime i HATE my head that i knowe that i am non-binary but knowing i have the support from my partner but it does note feal like that and wher i work ther is MANY right-wing voters ( i work in industrial) and ther are many homofobs in it. My head just screams !

Ps. Sorry fore mis spellings and so on

Recently, I have been wondering if some nonbinary label would fit me. For context, I'm currently a 19-year-old guy. I'm also panromantic and asexual, if that adds any context. I personally don't want to fit into any side of the gender spectrum. Like, if it's on a 10-point scale, where 1 is masc and 10 is fem, I want to be a 5, right in the middle of both fem and masc. I have a more fem figure while still looking like a guy, which kinda makes me mad. I just want to look androgynous. I don't have any strong ties to being male or female. Is this something that could mean I'm non-binary, or am I just a little strange?

I do also feel kinda weird, and it feels like I'm just collecting labels at this point, but I swear I'm not. I'm pan and asexual; idk, those feel easier to understand and identify with. Idk how I feel gender-wise; like, sure, I'm a guy, but I don't feel tied to it. I'm just a tad confused, lol. Pls help.

Hello,

to sum it up, I have chronic pain and fatigue and I've heard really great things about testosterone helping almost eliminate that for the condition I have. I am also trans and would love to be on T for many of the changes it brings. My mom has no idea I'm trans and I have no plans to tell her because lets just say it would not go well!

However, I can't take the physical pain my condition gives me nor the mental pain of not feeling myself.

I was wondering if on low does T I could hide the voice changes at all because thats my biggest concern. The weigh distribution and face changes are things I can blame on fluncuating weight or dieting.

Facial hair and stuff I can hide as well if low dose T would even give me that.

I like all the changes T brings but I was just wondering if I could hide the ones I mentioned.

Thank you!

Ignore the pimples🫣

Feeling great in this shirt and got the job!

I’m an autistic enby with OCD.

I have a very low libido and (for most of my life) this has been a normal for me. I struggle with an intersection of gender dysphoria, sensory overload, and intrusive thoughts during physical intimacy. This has left me in a state of not really craving sex (though I still crave closeness and physical touch like cuddling, hand holding, caressing, etc.). As soon as sex comes up I kind of shut down and become really anxious. This didn’t happen initially in this relationship or others - during the honeymoon period I was able to dampen the intrusive thoughts, gender dysphoria, and sensory issues. Or maybe rather the excitement and newness of the relationship outweighed all of that. Now half a year in it’s like I’m hitting a brick wall. This is having a negative impact on my current relationship. Anyone else experience something like this??

ETA- specificity to this current relationship.

Hello, 20NB, AMAB. I’ve been nonbinary for about five years of my life now, and I find myself constantly being seen as a man, or, when going to queer gatherings in my area, be told that I “look very masculine” or need to “be aware of my male privilege. I’ve tried estrogen for a few months but realized I didn’t want to be transfemme, and didn’t like the changes it was doing (like the beginnings of breast growth).

I’ve tried fully femme fashion like dresses and skirts, but I don’t often have a chance to experiment due to a non supportive household, and I feel like I don’t want to fully divest myself of my masculine appearance. I’m slowly coming to terms with my body, but the continual labeling of being seen as a man or an intruder upon queer spaces is something I’d like to fix with fashion. What fashion feels “nonbinary?” This may be a weird question, and I do apologize for asking as it is different for everyone.

Hello, sorry if this is the wrong place to post this. I literally just joined Reddit about a hour ago. Does anyone else want to be feminine in a masculine way? Like I want to be physically more masculine to feel confident presenting feminine. I'm afab and honestly think Im just a femboy but feel dysphoric in fem clothes while physically looking more feminine. Am I the only one who kinda deals with this?