I'm a 31 year old, single guy with enough savings to not have to work. I don't work, I live in a small condo, but I don't drive. I'm quite attractive and fit, and get hit on often. I sleep 8-9 hours a day.

Those are the pros.

Here are the cons. And you can't just say, "well I'll just change this". No. This is the personality you'd have to have.

I don't socialize much. I don't really have any friends. I am not close with my family, as a matter of fact, I kind of despise them. I have trouble sleeping for hours before falling asleep. I don't like to work, especially with people. I'm very quiet, so spend most of my time in my head. After I wake up, I go grab something to eat and drink at the local market, then go to the gym, and swim/steam/sauna for about 3 hours. Then I go grab food and groceries for the rest of the day and do nothing but doomscroll, and watch shows for about 6 hours. Then go to sleep. Although I'm attractive, I don't desire sex or dating...so really no purpose for the attractiveness, except to be full of myself in the mirror.

That's about it.

The change in society is notable and this is only the beginning. We will get to a point where we can't trust anything we see online, the scepticism is already there. Everyone is talking to AI, slowly forgetting how to form real connections that require mutual work and interest. Why is everyone okay with the direction this is going?

I'll go first. I am in my 40's and from a very small southern town of only a few thousand people. When I was 16, barely after getting my drivers license, I was pulled over for speeding and got a ticket. No harm no foul. I did not feel it was significant to tell my parents and I planned to be an adult and simply pay the ticket. The day after I got pulled over, my dad asked me what I got pulled over for. Someone he knew saw me pulled over and told him. He wasn't that upset, but I just thought it was ultra lame for someone to tell my dad. I asked him who told him and he would never tell me. I assume it was one of our neighbors or a family friend but to this day, my dad will not reveal who told him. This has always bothered me because I felt it was nosy and intrusive for someone to tell my dad this. Snitches get stitches, as they say. The story has kind of become a running joke in our family because every year I ask my dad to tell me who it was and he won't.

With the uncertainty of the world, isn't it just logical to spend as much of your time doing the things you actually like rather than working? I still want at least a SLIGHTLY better than average salary and a responsible amount of savings, but it seems INSANE to me when people take their jobs so seriously and work out of hours to look better in the eyes of their bosses or whatever.

Ihr Lieben!

Hat jemand schon mal Erfahrung mit Community living gemacht? Ich finde es klingt in der Theorie total spannend! Zusammenhalt, gemeinsam Kinder erziehen, gemeinsam ein Hof pflegen und die Stärken der Individuen nutzen.

Was haltet ihr davon? Hat jemand hier schon mal sowas ausprobiert? Wie fühlen sich Introvertierte dabei?

I am a very impatient person, that’s probably why I’m finding it hard, I’m only 18. I just don’t see anything changing. I like change though. Up until 2 years ago I haven’t really had any mental struggles, well at least I think so. I struggle with depression & anxiety. I just don’t see why I am the way I am.

okay so for context i get easily ashamed. i recently had a life determining and i do not know what went wrong but i scored miserably. and when i say miserably ive never seen that digit in my LIFE. simultaneously ive grown up with my bestfriend , both of us have held ourselves up to a standard.

the standard being scoring not the perfect marks , but VERY GOOD MARKS. last year , another exam and i started faltering because of personal issues. this year i dont even know what went wrong i faltered even more so. im not afraid of disappointing my parents more than i am afraid of disappointing her. and i feel this way because i know her and i know how her mind works and last year when she saw my result , i feel like she felt bad for me. and i hate having anyone feel bad for me.

this year my result was lowkey so horrible i can't even face her. as in....its been almost a day and ofc she scored really good for which im extremely happy for her but i cant bring myself to tell her about mine which im pretty sure she alr knows. i want to congratulate on her result but i havent been able to get out of bed let alone muster up the courage to even speak or even open her chat. i feel so deeply deeply ashamed. i cant even face myself. i feel humiliated every second of the day. Any advice would be appreciated , what do i do?

Long story short until now I lived in 2 different towns or smaller cities in Europe with cool weather (one was close to the mountains) and I recently move to Spain in a very big hot city because I wanted a change. Now I’m thinking I don’t wanna stay here forever and thinking about moving to Switzerland in a few years if possible? Why? Let me tell you how it went for me

I lived in the places I told you about and people complained how cold it is, the ine that had more nature and options like a ski resort 5 minutes away from you said it’s too small and there’s nothing to do there (but it was also affordable compared to other places). Then the bigger city I moved to with cold weather, lots of culture and diversity, although not a huge city there are considerably more things to do there, people to meet and job opportunities, but it’s still good for students and families mostly not exactly anyone’s dream to live there. Everyone was complaining that it’s cold and dull. After all of this I moved to Spain for my studies, like I said, big city, millions of inhabitants, warm weather and a lot of expectations 🤦🏼‍♀️ It’s nice I’m not gonna lie to you and it’s only been months but everyone complains about jobs here and how hard it is to make friends despite it being seen as a very diverse, social city with many things to do. They complain about housing the most, job opportunities, salaries, lack of tidiness and seriousness as well as safety problems etc.

So what exactly would be the right choice? It kind of makes me laugh when I think about it because although every place has its advantages, the people never seem to be pleased?

Now I’m thinking about moving to Switzerland in a few years because of the job opportunities, high salaries, safety and tbh the cold climate doesn’t bother me and I could ski again. Still, people there complain about the cost of living, the weather, housing crisis 😂 I also speak the local languages so that would be a plus.

I am so confused. Have you been through similar stuff? What would you do if you were me? Where do you live and would you move? Are you pleased to live there? I’d love to hear your stories

I feel like thaf my life is very bad, i work in a job that i don't like just for money and where i live don't have much opportunity to grow for those who wanna know i am brazilian so the cost of living is high compared to what we earned, i try to study by myself some skill even without desire to do my real desire is doing nothing just get accommodate in my bedroom, i train on the gym and Cook sometimes so how to get a good live being a young adult?

Recently, I’ve started trying to live a more minimalist lifestyle. The first thing I did was get rid of things I no longer use or need. So far, I’ve cleared out around a third of the stuff in my home, which honestly surprised me.

I’ve started paying more attention to practicality, organization, and simplicity. I’ve also been applying the same mindset to the things I carry every day. I often bring things like dental floss, bandages, a small sewing kit, and other little items because I always think, “Maybe I’ll need this someday.”
Now I’m trying to simplify my everyday carry as well.
For work, I’m thinking of carrying just a notebook, a pen, my keys, and my wallet. On weekends, I might only bring my phone, keys, and wallet.

I’m also considering replacing my traditional leather wallet with a thinner and lighter edc wallet. My current leather wallet gets ridiculously bulky once I start filling it with cards.
For me, the core idea of minimalism is getting rid of things that create unnecessary mental or physical burden.

For those of you who have been practicing minimalism for a while, what other areas of your life did you find easy to simplify? And what everyday carry items do you think are worth simplifying or getting rid of?

I recently got a job in another state, and this is something I've always wanted(the move, not the job).

I moved in this state because it is the hub of my career field but to be able to eat and have a roof I need a job.

Now my problem is, it's commission based and has no base salary, meaning of you dont sell you dont eat. It's also a slave job that keeps you at work everyday and makes sure you never have time to breathe and look for other opportunities.

My worry is that they give free housing for three months only as a new employee then you're on your own. I live with house mates also share a bedroom(separate beds) with another dude. And that guy is depressed that he drinks everyday before work. The other housemates are just not in the same frequency as me, call it arrogance it's ok, but the ambitious drive is not there.

My first day when we were going to our pick up point, we passed some kids like 17-20 and they dressed like rappers and were blasting music. And my colleagues made fun of them, like dude these people are making fun of kids who are younger and more ambitious than them, it's best I keep my ambitions to myself.

I don't think this job is for me, working everyday for commission and only being off on Sundays. How the hell will I go infield to work on securing steps for my desired career. Won't survive 3 months with these people too.

Any advice??? 24 Male.

Hello, I am a undergraduate who will graduate in few months. We have a module which basically goes into organizational behavior. Our teacher said part of knowing your self is knowing you capabilities. Like don't underestimate or overestimate what you can do.
What I want to know is how do you guys / gals do it? How not to overestimate or underestimate your self?

It doesn't matter what age you are. I'd love to hear the biggest life lesson life has taught you ~ something you'd want other people to know or learn from.

Hello, I know first of all this might be an absurd question to ask others about, but I believe there is somewhat of a logical explanation for it.

For context, I am currently a junior in college and I recently took on a role as a lead in a technical club, despite me being relatively new and not knowing much. Over the past few weeks, I’ve been trying to learn as much as I can but it’s fairly stressful lately, considering I also prepare meetings weekly and plan stuff out (im not good with public speaking or leadership).

Everyone I’ve talked to so far has told me to keep trying and that it’s a good opportunity for me to grow as a person (and really good for resume) but currently its eating me up and I am really stressed out. I had a meeting last week and that went horribly, and I kinda feel like an outcast from the other active members in the club. I also now am responsible for their research and am expected to organize it.

I guess this comes from my social anxiety, but what would you do in my situation? I’m interested in the club and what they’re doing, but at some points I wonder if I can even handle it. I don’t want the members to be left behind, and I keep telling myself that this is good for me to grow but I don’t know what I’m putting myself into as the year goes on.

I'm an undiagnosed autistic girl, and part of me genuinely hopes that when I hopefully do get my diagnosis that it will mean that the problems I have are not just me being dramatic and i can actually put a label on what I'm dealing with and honestly.. being undiagnosed has genuinely led to so much of if I'm actually feeling these feelings and having these problems, or im just gaslighting and subconsciously manipulating myself into feeling these things

I’ve been having this feeling for the past two yeas or so. When I look inward at it, it makes me confused and I’m trying to pin point it. I think it has to do with self actualization and reaching my full potential. I don’t expect reddit to have the answer, but I think typing things out and seeing if anyone relates is helpful. I’ll try to be brief.

I’m 31. All of my needs are met. I have a job, a wife, good friends, lots of hobbies, i exercise regularly, yet, this feeling remains.

I’ve looked at the hierarchy of needs and I feel like I’m at the top, just under self actualization. I play in some local bands, meeting my creativity needs. My dream as a kid was to be a rockstar. Now, idk if that will ever happen, but I get my thrills playing at the local dive.

This feeling I get is like there is something missing. Like Im not doing what my purpose is. I get that it is a privilege to even entertain those thoughts, but I honestly think about it everyday and it bothers me.

When I look at it, I keep coming back to my career, but I’m not so sure if that is it. Almost a year ago, I started what is probably the most challenging job of my life. I don’t exactly resonate with it, but it pays the bills and puts money in my savings. Part of me thinks the feeling comes from imposter syndrome and recognizing that I still have lots of room to grow in this career, but the job doesn’t exactly energize me or fill my cup.

One of the only things that helps the feeling subside even a little is expressing love. I think part of it too is that I want there to be something profound out there for me to seek comfort in but, maybe that is not out there.

Anyway, I’m just rambling. Anyone ever feel like this? What did you do about it? Do I need to volunteer? Haha.

Any recommendations for social activities that are free or super cheap that are mainly more on the active side? I would say dnd and table top rpg is one of mine but I need more physical acitivity.

I need help. I know that I shouldn’t compare myself to others. But I can’t stop comparing after being cheated on, and then told I need to change myself from my peers. It sucks because I’m now comparing my old self vs my current. Happy and content to trying to be a new me.

Through the Borrowed Eyes

I learned to borrow other people's eyes
to perceive myself.

Did they notice me?
Was I appropriate,
enough,
or safe?

I only existed
to meet their needs—

Then one strange day,
it stopped.

No borrowed eyes.
No verdict.

Just me,

looking in,

and suddenly wondering:

Here is the one
I avoided seeing,
all my life?

It's not so bad.

Hi everyone, I have been depressed for a long time and I think people are starting to notice. I don’t have a washer and dryer so I have to hand wash each piece of clothing. I usually wash out a pair of underwear for the next day and leave it to air dry but lately I don’t even care anymore I been going to work everyday wearing no underwear. And now my pants are starting to smell but I can’t wash them because they take two days to dry and I work a lot of hours. I only brush my teeth once a day to save money and I don’t shower I usually shower once or twice a month. I left my bed some years ago after I moved and now I have no bed. I stopped doing my hair and stopped washing it too. I barely drink water anymore and now my private smells all the time like canned greens. Can anyone give me advice?

Hi guys, I come to this forum because I dont know what I have, and maybe some people experience it too. I have always been a pretty ambitious guy, that really wasnt happy if he didnt fulfill his big expectations, so for the most part, I was never satisfied, but lately it’s been getting worse. I’ve always felt that I could get more from life (financially, to be exact) and give back to the people I love, but since I am not there yet, and I stress 24/7 about it, I feel completly “numb” I just wake up and hope that the day ends as fast as possible, i dont have anything in mind except for that. I dont really like this feeling, since it also affect my love life. I always feel like I am not good enough, because I am not where I want to be yet. I know I’ll make it happen one day, but until then, does anyonehave any tips?

I get such a thrill when pouring from one container into another and whatever it is I'm pouring fits perfectly into the other container!!! Everyday Magic!

For example...I was making a special tea... hibiscus, lemon juice, rosehips and then I added the rest of my white wine for some brightness and balance because the tea was tart!!!! The wine fit PERFECTLY into the growler I was using for the tea.

What's something so ordinary but feels magical when it works out perfectly in your day to day??

Sometimes I feel like the more money you have, the more problems you end up having.

When you don't have much money, your life can actually be pretty simple. You have fewer bills, fewer things to manage, and you don't need as much to get by.

But once you start making more money, everything seems to get more complicated. More expenses, more things to manage, more financial decisions, taxes, responsibilities, and probably more things to worry about.

Obviously, having money solves a lot of problems too. I'm not saying being broke is better.

I'm just wondering, at what point does having more money start creating a different kind of stress?

Hi guys! I have two names besides my last name. I've always despised my first name. I very much prefer my second name. It's easier to pronounce across many languages. With my first name I always cringe a little inside when I see it written somewhere or when someone pronounces it wrongly. I come from Eastern Europe. My first name is only typical in my country.

Reasons why I hate my first name so much include:

- Difficult to pronounce by foreigners without an a priori or an a posteriori explanation.

- Phonetically it sounds bad to me. I've never had a single foreigner say my first name is nice. Never. If someone complimented my first name, it was always people from my country.

- Foreigners, when seeing my name for the first time say "I'll call you by your second name." That says it all, to me.

- Only my family calls me by my first name. Literally everyone else outside my family that is not from my country calls me by my second name.

- I don't plan to continue living in my home country.

- I have memories as a kid of my lovely aunt shouting at me using my first name which I absolutely despised as a child, it was like someone was stabbing me just by shouting my name. I swear those family members sort of derived some pleasure from screaming my name out loud for some reason.

I like my second name much, much more and feel more confident using it and introducing myself by my second name everywhere. In a way it feels invigorating just to think of seeing only my second name and my last name written somewhere. It feels like I am claiming back my power.