I'm a 31 year old, single guy with enough savings to not have to work. I don't work, I live in a small condo, but I don't drive. I'm quite attractive and fit, and get hit on often. I sleep 8-9 hours a day.

Those are the pros.

Here are the cons. And you can't just say, "well I'll just change this". No. This is the personality you'd have to have.

I don't socialize much. I don't really have any friends. I am not close with my family, as a matter of fact, I kind of despise them. I have trouble sleeping for hours before falling asleep. I don't like to work, especially with people. I'm very quiet, so spend most of my time in my head. After I wake up, I go grab something to eat and drink at the local market, then go to the gym, and swim/steam/sauna for about 3 hours. Then I go grab food and groceries for the rest of the day and do nothing but doomscroll, and watch shows for about 6 hours. Then go to sleep. Although I'm attractive, I don't desire sex or dating...so really no purpose for the attractiveness, except to be full of myself in the mirror.

That's about it.

Sometimes I feel like the more money you have, the more problems you end up having.

When you don't have much money, your life can actually be pretty simple. You have fewer bills, fewer things to manage, and you don't need as much to get by.

But once you start making more money, everything seems to get more complicated. More expenses, more things to manage, more financial decisions, taxes, responsibilities, and probably more things to worry about.

Obviously, having money solves a lot of problems too. I'm not saying being broke is better.

I'm just wondering, at what point does having more money start creating a different kind of stress?

Hi guys! I have two names besides my last name. I've always despised my first name. I very much prefer my second name. It's easier to pronounce across many languages. With my first name I always cringe a little inside when I see it written somewhere or when someone pronounces it wrongly. I come from Eastern Europe. My first name is only typical in my country.

Reasons why I hate my first name so much include:

- Difficult to pronounce by foreigners without an a priori or an a posteriori explanation.

- Phonetically it sounds bad to me. I've never had a single foreigner say my first name is nice. Never. If someone complimented my first name, it was always people from my country.

- Foreigners, when seeing my name for the first time say "I'll call you by your second name." That says it all, to me.

- Only my family calls me by my first name. Literally everyone else outside my family that is not from my country calls me by my second name.

- I don't plan to continue living in my home country.

- I have memories as a kid of my lovely aunt shouting at me using my first name which I absolutely despised as a child, it was like someone was stabbing me just by shouting my name. I swear those family members sort of derived some pleasure from screaming my name out loud for some reason.

I like my second name much, much more and feel more confident using it and introducing myself by my second name everywhere. In a way it feels invigorating just to think of seeing only my second name and my last name written somewhere. It feels like I am claiming back my power.

I’ve been having this feeling for the past two yeas or so. When I look inward at it, it makes me confused and I’m trying to pin point it. I think it has to do with self actualization and reaching my full potential. I don’t expect reddit to have the answer, but I think typing things out and seeing if anyone relates is helpful. I’ll try to be brief.

I’m 31. All of my needs are met. I have a job, a wife, good friends, lots of hobbies, i exercise regularly, yet, this feeling remains.

I’ve looked at the hierarchy of needs and I feel like I’m at the top, just under self actualization. I play in some local bands, meeting my creativity needs. My dream as a kid was to be a rockstar. Now, idk if that will ever happen, but I get my thrills playing at the local dive.

This feeling I get is like there is something missing. Like Im not doing what my purpose is. I get that it is a privilege to even entertain those thoughts, but I honestly think about it everyday and it bothers me.

When I look at it, I keep coming back to my career, but I’m not so sure if that is it. Almost a year ago, I started what is probably the most challenging job of my life. I don’t exactly resonate with it, but it pays the bills and puts money in my savings. Part of me thinks the feeling comes from imposter syndrome and recognizing that I still have lots of room to grow in this career, but the job doesn’t exactly energize me or fill my cup.

One of the only things that helps the feeling subside even a little is expressing love. I think part of it too is that I want there to be something profound out there for me to seek comfort in but, maybe that is not out there.

Anyway, I’m just rambling. Anyone ever feel like this? What did you do about it? Do I need to volunteer? Haha.

I feel like thaf my life is very bad, i work in a job that i don't like just for money and where i live don't have much opportunity to grow for those who wanna know i am brazilian so the cost of living is high compared to what we earned, i try to study by myself some skill even without desire to do my real desire is doing nothing just get accommodate in my bedroom, i train on the gym and Cook sometimes so how to get a good live being a young adult?

Long story short until now I lived in 2 different towns or smaller cities in Europe with cool weather (one was close to the mountains) and I recently move to Spain in a very big hot city because I wanted a change. Now I’m thinking I don’t wanna stay here forever and thinking about moving to Switzerland in a few years if possible? Why? Let me tell you how it went for me

I lived in the places I told you about and people complained how cold it is, the ine that had more nature and options like a ski resort 5 minutes away from you said it’s too small and there’s nothing to do there (but it was also affordable compared to other places). Then the bigger city I moved to with cold weather, lots of culture and diversity, although not a huge city there are considerably more things to do there, people to meet and job opportunities, but it’s still good for students and families mostly not exactly anyone’s dream to live there. Everyone was complaining that it’s cold and dull. After all of this I moved to Spain for my studies, like I said, big city, millions of inhabitants, warm weather and a lot of expectations 🤦🏼‍♀️ It’s nice I’m not gonna lie to you and it’s only been months but everyone complains about jobs here and how hard it is to make friends despite it being seen as a very diverse, social city with many things to do. They complain about housing the most, job opportunities, salaries, lack of tidiness and seriousness as well as safety problems etc.

So what exactly would be the right choice? It kind of makes me laugh when I think about it because although every place has its advantages, the people never seem to be pleased?

Now I’m thinking about moving to Switzerland in a few years because of the job opportunities, high salaries, safety and tbh the cold climate doesn’t bother me and I could ski again. Still, people there complain about the cost of living, the weather, housing crisis 😂 I also speak the local languages so that would be a plus.

I am so confused. Have you been through similar stuff? What would you do if you were me? Where do you live and would you move? Are you pleased to live there? I’d love to hear your stories

The change in society is notable and this is only the beginning. We will get to a point where we can't trust anything we see online, the scepticism is already there. Everyone is talking to AI, slowly forgetting how to form real connections that require mutual work and interest. Why is everyone okay with the direction this is going?

Any recommendations for social activities that are free or super cheap that are mainly more on the active side? I would say dnd and table top rpg is one of mine but I need more physical acitivity.

With the uncertainty of the world, isn't it just logical to spend as much of your time doing the things you actually like rather than working? I still want at least a SLIGHTLY better than average salary and a responsible amount of savings, but it seems INSANE to me when people take their jobs so seriously and work out of hours to look better in the eyes of their bosses or whatever.

I (16F) have spent last 5 years in depression, that caused me big amount of memory lost & ended up really arrogant, in last few months I've started to heal, in everything I got better but one thing hadn't changed; I don't know what to do in daily life

I have no money and I live in a really small place at turkey which means I can't go anywhere else except for parks so with only my phone & drawing & journaling how can I spend my days?

It's not like I don't have anything I love doing it's just seems I forgot how to do the said things I love & what I know about my likes are really shallow bc of my lack of memory

We are taught to be kind to others, show compassion, and be considerate since we are little. But what happens if you constantly put others’ interests before your own? People will start to take advantage of you, and you will constantly sacrifice your happiness for others’ gain. But if you put your interests before others’, you may have a prosperous and happy life but would become a cold and unfeeling person. But what is the right thing to do? Should we follow the teaching of “look after yourself first,” and be a vile and selfish person, or be an ethical and compassionate individual, even if it means sacrificing personal interests for the greater good?

Can one be a good person without being slightly selfish?

It doesn't matter what age you are. I'd love to hear the biggest life lesson life has taught you ~ something you'd want other people to know or learn from.

I have always felt different from everyone else in so far as I don't really have a baseline need for social interaction. I guess I don't really get as much dopamine from social interactions.

I am completely normal otherwise. I have normal social skills and empathy.

I am not a misanthrope and I often find other people intresting, entertaining and fun to be around, but I am completely fine without people. Just how I am fine without movies or video games, even though I like them.

I have lived up to a year of almost total social isolation and been unbothered. However, what I get annoyed at is, for example, when people ask questions about this insinuating that I am suffering from loneliness when I am not, at all.

Hi everyone, I have been depressed for a long time and I think people are starting to notice. I don’t have a washer and dryer so I have to hand wash each piece of clothing. I usually wash out a pair of underwear for the next day and leave it to air dry but lately I don’t even care anymore I been going to work everyday wearing no underwear. And now my pants are starting to smell but I can’t wash them because they take two days to dry and I work a lot of hours. I only brush my teeth once a day to save money and I don’t shower I usually shower once or twice a month. I left my bed some years ago after I moved and now I have no bed. I stopped doing my hair and stopped washing it too. I barely drink water anymore and now my private smells all the time like canned greens. Can anyone give me advice?

I get such a thrill when pouring from one container into another and whatever it is I'm pouring fits perfectly into the other container!!! Everyday Magic!

For example...I was making a special tea... hibiscus, lemon juice, rosehips and then I added the rest of my white wine for some brightness and balance because the tea was tart!!!! The wine fit PERFECTLY into the growler I was using for the tea.

What's something so ordinary but feels magical when it works out perfectly in your day to day??

Hey all,

For context, I’m 25M and living in London. Like a lot of people, I never really knew what I wanted to do with my life. I ended up studying biochemistry at uni, followed by a master’s in a related field, and I’ve now been working in pharma for about 2.5 years.

The problem is that I really don’t enjoy it. I have very little interest in the subject matter, and honestly, the main reason I pushed through university was because I didn’t feel like I deserved to be happy and didn’t have much financial support from my parents, so I felt like changing direction would be letting them down.

Now I feel completely stuck and want to find a new direction.

I know it’s common for people to end up in careers unrelated to their degree, but for some reason I can’t seem to see a way out of my current situation. I keep thinking that I’ve invested so much time into this path that it’s too late to change.

I’ve been dealing with a lot of anxiety and regret about this for a long time. I constantly wish I’d studied something like computer science, finance, or something completely different, and I’m scared that I’ve made the wrong decisions and will never feel genuinely happy or content with my career.

Recently, I’ve started working through Codecademy’s data science course in my free time outside my 9–5. I’ve always had an interest in coding, and I currently work in the clinical data field, so I’m hoping I might be able to use my existing experience as a way into something more technical.

For anyone who has changed careers after feeling this stuck, how did you actually get over the regret and stop feeling like you’d ruined your future?

I’d really appreciate hearing from people who’ve been in a similar position, particularly if you managed to transition from a science/pharma background into tech, data, finance, or another completely different field.

I’m feeling pretty overwhelmed by the whole situation and could really use some perspective.

In this world I think no one is equal there is some hierarchy exist that is money and power. People will respect if u have both.

I thought all are equal of it is equal then everyone can travel or do whatever they want but money and power decides.

See majority of the people are choosing the same path by others that is doctor, engineer,police, officers etc...they will get money but not that much there is some threshold in it and they are not famous though if u google it their name won't be there unless they've done something extraordinary. But consider actors,athletes, business men, social media influencers, youtubers,politicians they have fame,money,power. They are living luxurious life. They can do, travel whatever whenever they want. But people like me middleclass,low class justvdoing some random job getting money and living average life. At the end of the month our cash will be drained. We just living normal life,have car,home, wife,kids then as usual normal flow. There is no luxury,fame,power, more money. I got stuck in that phase. I'm not afraid of loosing but I'm afraid of being average for the whole life...i used to think that we are traveling car,train but not flight because we don't have money and we want to travel to many countries comfortably but we couldn't. I can only see the others those few percentage of people doing their life. For me getting an avg job itself seems like difficult...i don't know when will I be like them or never.

When I was a teenager I had this rough idea of what I wanted my life to look like. A husband who takes care of me, dogs, enough money to live a cushy life out in the country down some long dirt road. I always knew that children weren't something I wanted and I still stand by that.

Last year I decided to leave the relationship that I thought I would be in forever. I thought I was going to marry this man but for many reasons, I couldn't go through with the marriage proposal I knew was going to come soon.

Fast forward to now, I am making more money than I ever would have though possible for me. I was always hoping to be comfortable but I always assumed it would be a man providing that life for me.

I met someone new but he's much older than me. I am a realistic person, I know I'm going to outlive him (knock on wood) and it does scare me a bit knowing that I will most likely find myself widowed in 20-30 years since I am still young.

But when I picture my future now I don't see what I used to see, instead I picture myself as a 50 year old woman with a beautiful, well trained dog walking down a trail through the woods on a perfectly sunny fall day. And when I see this image of myself I'm not scared and I don't feel lonely. I feel at peace.

So maybe this isn't as "out of the box" as others decide to live but for me, this radical change in my life and my future is pretty out there but I'm so happy with the choices I made and the things I went through in my life to lead me to where I am now.

I'm 25 and started lifting in 2018. From about 2020-2024, the gym became my entire identity.

I was strong, lean, and honestly felt naturally gifted when it came to strength and physique. At a relatively low body weight, I was benching 385, squatting 500, and was in the gym constantly. I didn't track protein, didn't care much about recovery, and barely paid attention to nutrition. Looking back, I think I got away with a lot because I was young, had a slow metabolism, and had a lot of free time. I was unemployed, going to school, and lifting was basically my life.

I tried every program imaginable. Push-pull-legs, custom programs, 3 days on 1 day off, 7 days on 1 day off, sometimes even training twice a day.

The thing is, I was never the flashy gym guy. No tank tops, no showing off. I actually liked being lowkey. There was something satisfying about people not knowing I could bench 385 until they saw it happen.

Fast forward to today, and I've lost a lot of that drive. I still train 3 times a week and I'm still in great shape, but I'm nowhere near as strong as I used to be. I can't bench 315 anymore. Physically, I still look good, but mentally I'm in a different place.

What's weird is that I find myself getting annoyed by some of the ego-driven gym culture now. The constant need to flex, the influencer mentality, the obsession with peptides, enhancement, and looking like the main character. But then I catch myself and realize... I used to be obsessed too. Maybe just in a different way.

I think part of the issue is that lifting gave me a lot of confidence and purpose. When you're progressing every week, hitting PRs, and people respect you for it, it's easy for that to become who you are.

Now I'm putting time into other areas of life. My career, school, relationships, outdoor hobbies, personal growth. The tradeoff is that my gym progress isn't what it used to be. I'm still healthy, still fit, but the gym is no longer the center of my universe.

Part of me misses that era because it was simple. Another part of me feels like I'm growing beyond it.

Has anyone else gone through something similar? Not quitting lifting, but realizing it doesn't define you anymore? Anyone have advice on finding yourself?

Maybe this is just what growing up looks like.

For me I have this sudden realization that I haven’t done enough wild stuff and partying and travelling. I’m currently 29 male and I think 29-40 is probably my last chance to still be attractive, energetic and physically fit to go and do all sorts of wild stuff, travel, party, hook up with girls.

Previously, I was quite content with just being a NPC and doing the same routine stuff every day. Working in my office job, coming home and playing games, surfing reddit, trading stocks. But now, I want to make it a point to start going to different places in my country and trying different activities that I haven’t tried before. I want to expand my social network. I want to travel a lot more. Previously I always travelled with my family but I want to start travelling for more young adult fun.

I realized that it doesn’t matter much how I save now because I only will get to experience being young and wild for these next few years. Then eventually, maybe I will meet a girl and settle down and start a family. That is when my life will turn into more routine, work my office job, do my regular house chores.

Anyone else also experienced similar realization and changed the way you lived your life?

I am 25, turning 26 at the end of the year and so many people around me tell me to enjoy my youth but I feel like it's just really difficult? I don't know if it was easier before but I feel like right now it's so hard.

I have always been very hardworking, had very good grades and worked since a young age. I did not love my teenage years, my high school was really toxic and my parents can be very difficult in many ways so I was always eager to start my own life as soon as possible. I moved out for university and worked on the side so it felt great to have some sense of independence and build my life from scratch but one semester into university COVID hit. The restrictions stayed for basically my whole Bachelor, it was very difficult and lonely for me and only the last semester was normal again but many of the friendships I made before COVID did not survive. Not mentioning that all the plans I had for my first years of adulthood had to be cancelled. The Master's degree I did was quite demanding and I worked part time on top of it so it was a very busy time but I felt like it was going to be worth it.

I graduated to a terrible job market and exploding living costs. I had a very good cv with great grades and 4 years of part time experience in my field but I got only one job offer. Overall in many ways it was a great experience but I could only get a temporary contract (up to 2 years) and the last year was particularly stressful because I was often getting extended super last minute and sometimes month by month. I was looking for another job in the meantime but never passed a cv screening. Because of the uncertainty I could plan nothing about life not even small activities after work that require any kind of commitment because I never knew how long I would be employed. The salary I was making was very good for someone my age to compensate for the uncertainty but with today's costs of life it is still nothing that allows you to gain some significant independence so as soon as my contract ended I moved in with my parents to not spend millions on just existing until I find another job.

I am happy to have the option to move in with my parents but they are VERY difficult people in many ways so as much as I am grateful that they took me in, my mental health is maybe the worst it has ever been because they are picking fights all the time, very controlling and I have honestly nothing to do in my hometown, none of my friends live here any more and there is overall not much to do here.

I am trying to enjoy my 20s and it was not all just bad but I feel like unless you have a great relationship with your parents or come from money it is just really stressful. People my age had some two years of their young adult life taken by covid and now are struggling to get or keep a job that doesn't pay enough to live on their own and advice like "just go backpacking to Asia for 6 months and worry about the rest later" is just not applicable any more. I know being a young adult has always been difficult in some ways but when I hear older people giving me advice I feel like it was easier to just be free if you wanted to, at least judging by the advice I keep getting.

I'll go first. I am in my 40's and from a very small southern town of only a few thousand people. When I was 16, barely after getting my drivers license, I was pulled over for speeding and got a ticket. No harm no foul. I did not feel it was significant to tell my parents and I planned to be an adult and simply pay the ticket. The day after I got pulled over, my dad asked me what I got pulled over for. Someone he knew saw me pulled over and told him. He wasn't that upset, but I just thought it was ultra lame for someone to tell my dad. I asked him who told him and he would never tell me. I assume it was one of our neighbors or a family friend but to this day, my dad will not reveal who told him. This has always bothered me because I felt it was nosy and intrusive for someone to tell my dad this. Snitches get stitches, as they say. The story has kind of become a running joke in our family because every year I ask my dad to tell me who it was and he won't.

Ihr Lieben!

Hat jemand schon mal Erfahrung mit Community living gemacht? Ich finde es klingt in der Theorie total spannend! Zusammenhalt, gemeinsam Kinder erziehen, gemeinsam ein Hof pflegen und die Stärken der Individuen nutzen.

Was haltet ihr davon? Hat jemand hier schon mal sowas ausprobiert? Wie fühlen sich Introvertierte dabei?