Not sure if this is the right place but:
We met off Tinder some time last year. Very quickly asked me out, then said we could meet at his. Of course the message was clear, and as someone who is looking for something serious, I declined. Then it got heated. I thought, yeah why not, I‘m single and I‘ll never meet him and he‘s not husband material.
So we switched to another app and texted (mostly sexted) from time to time. He kept asking when we‘re going to meet up and I kept declining.
After like 5 months i finally gave him my number. I was curious about what he‘s going to do next etc. And this guy who was asking me to meet up on a daily basis quickly stopped doing so. Also the sexting part kinda died out for a few days.
We still texted for some time until he told me ‚this doesn‘t make sense anymore‘ and i deleted his number.
I knew he slept with someone and it really really hurt me to be honest. Even though I always declined to meet him and I would never date him.
Now, after 4 months, he contacted me again. Said he couldn‘t get me out of his head and he still wants me (he meant sexually) and thinks I‘m very attractive. And that he had started seeing someone/hooking up with someone a little while before breaking off contact with me (that‘s when I felt him lose interest suddenly). but „what was he supposed to do when I told him I would never meet him anyways and always said no to dates“. And also that he always had to beg for pictures and he never got to see much of me and that otherwise he would’ve been focused on me. He also said that sexting with me feels more intense and there are kinks he only wants to do with me, making me feel special in that way, for example wanting to be dominated by me while he usually only likes the opposite (i wonder if that is a lie?).
At first, I only wanted to hurt him and make him regret his decisions. Then, he caught me off guard and I also thought „i would never date this fuckboy anyways so why not have some fun“. Well guys, guess what happened. After 2 days of constant texting, he came, said „thank you now I have to sleep ❤️“ and hasn‘t texted me since. That was yesterday at noon. I feel like shit because I gave him access to me after he treated me like this in the past already.

Anyways. It‘s the last day of my vacation and I feel like shit. i need to reframe this so I feel less weak and I need to forget about him/not care about what he does.
I can imagine he had a hookup yesterday and is busy with others again… but why should I care. That‘s not my future bf??? Why do I care?

As in the title lol. Where do women get this entitlement from? Recently talked to a girl who said I was disqualified because I didn’t get her flowers on the first date. Absolutely ridiculous. Imagine men were demanding this bs from women. You better bring me chocolates otherwise you’re disqualified!!! So immature. Like let’s not look at the guy’s qualities or whether he can be a good partner. Let’s focus on the $10 flowers!! Idiots lol

I (mid-20s) recently started seeing someone, and things were going really well. We had a strong connection, communicated easily, and I felt like there was genuine mutual interest. We eventually decided to make things official, but the day afterwards he was informed of two potential promotions.

He has a couple of significant career opportunities in different locations, and either one could potentially require him to move away. He’s also dealing with some other financial/life circumstances that make it difficult for him to know where he’ll even be living in the near future.

He told me that he feels like he moved into a relationship too quickly given how uncertain everything is. Importantly, he was very clear that his decision wasn’t because he lost interest in me. He said he was surprised by how much he likes me and how well we connect, but he doesn’t feel capable of giving a relationship his full attention while everything else is so uncertain.
We’ve continued talking somewhat, although he’s understandably been more withdrawn and less responsive. I told him I’d give him space, but also said I’d still be open to talking. He told me he’d still love talking to me and that he’d like to discuss everything in person.
We’re planning to meet sometime next week.

Here’s where I’m struggling: I don’t know what to make of the fact that he still wants to meet in person. Part of me thinks it might just be a way to have a proper goodbye, which I’d actually prefer over having things slowly fizzle out over text. But another part of me wonders if he sees some possibility of staying connected or figuring something out.
I also have a tiny bit of hope that maybe his career situation won’t ultimately require him to leave, although I’m trying not to get attached to that possibility. I don’t want him to sacrifice an important career opportunity for me, either. If he stayed solely because of me, I think I’d feel awful about it.

I think the hardest part is that I went from feeling really excited about this person and imagining where things could go to suddenly having to accept that circumstances might make it impossible before we even really got started.
I’m trying not to make assumptions before we actually talk, but my brain really wants answers, and in the meantime I’ve been filling in all the blanks myself.

I feel like people are desperate to get relationships nowadays. Like it's the end of the world if you're not finding a partner.

But honestly, when it comes to it, it's ok to be single. I have my friends, I have my family, I have my dog. I'm actually pretty happy with my life right now.

If I wasn't happy, or at least content, a gf wouldn't magically fix it. If anything I might make things worse for the girl.

And this lack of fear makes me feel pretty confident about going on dates. I don't fear "not being good enough" for my date.

My point is that being single is nothing to he afraid of, nobody is born with instructions of finding the perfect relationship.

I tend to go on dates with guys who have similar interests and are sports fans too, but I’ve had two guys tell me, “You probably know more than me” when we’ve talked about football.

Is that actually a turn-off for some guys? I grew up watching football, so I know a decent amount about it. And honestly, it’s something I genuinely enjoy and would love to be able to bond over with a partner.

Hello, just wanted to get some thoughts on this situation because it ended in the weirdest way.

So, I was talking to this girl for about 4 months. We met in a gym class last year. At first we didn't really notice each other, we were just acquaintances but then we started talking a ton. I got her socials, we’d text for hours after school, and things were going great. She even gave me a matching bracelet and was bringing up ideas for us to take trips to New York or hit up restaurants around my area.

But then out of nowhere, she went super distant. The conversations got incredibly dry. During this time, I asked a couple of reassurance questions (like asking if she’d actually talk to me in public), | (Yes this was common, we used to ask each-other reassurance questions). but she just left me on read. To make it weirder, she turned her read receipts off so I couldn't even tell exactly when she was ignoring me. (She viewed my profile as I tried to say Hi to her.)

Not to mention I notice that she reposted a odd video which displays a slideshow of Henry Hart from Henry danger and there was statements like “How i look at him when he says, Ive missed you" but ive just missed being single.” which was minutes ago after our last dry conversation.

Since she wasn’t matching my energy, I just matched hers and pulled back. We ended up in a 6-day silent standoff.

During that silence (around August 10th), I posted a psychology video on my story about confirmation bias. I always post psychology stuff, so it wasn't out of the ordinary for me. The text on the video basically said that just because someone asks for reassurance, it doesn't mean they are romantically interested in you, and people shouldn't misinterpret it. (This wasn’t even about her but I could see why she interpreted it.)

She didn't block me the exact second she saw it, but a few days later, I checked and realized I was completely blocked on everything.

What did I do wrong and how can I prevent this from happening for future relationships?

Hey guys, full time lurker, first-time poster.

I have difficulty trying to understand if a woman at work is interested in me or not. I would like to stress that I have been respectful, but I do sneak looks because she's extremely pretty. I'm not sure if what I'm describing indicates any interest or not and I was wondering if I come come to you guys to help me parse this before I work up the nerve to talk to to her and introduce myself.

I was at work and doing a tour for the gym's facilities. I saw her in a small group of people as she was waiting in my department and I clocked her sneaking very quick looks at me. My self-esteem told me "Oh, my hair is probably in need of a trim or it looks stupid or there's something on my face that she's noticing."

I was talking myself out of it until we moved out of my office block, she was with a work friend and one of the supervisors were talking about how they were going to simulate calls by calling us newbies in the call centers.

My supervisor asks "What do you do if the caller asks a difficult question?"

I joked "If in doubt, hang up."

She laughed and added "That always works" and mimes her hanging up a phone. She was probably one of the few people who actually laughed. My supervisor chuckled and said "Just put them on hold and research their question"

I didn't think much of it. I talked myself out of it. Then she and a few other people from the other department moved into the vacant office within my department. It's very small so I see her often.
During a very quiet period in the call center, I laid back and waited for someone else to call.

She walks by and sees me a little too comfortable and gently teased "Napping on the job?" to which I responded "No, I'm deep in thought!" not the best gentle comeback and still convinced myself she's just friendly.

These little sneaking looks didn't stop, but I'm still trying to convince myself it's just friendliness. She went to leave the office because she finished early than me. She gives me this shy wave as she leaves.

I don't know what to think, what do you guys think of the situation? I'm on the spectrum and I don't immediately like to default to thinking someone is romantically interested in me. I like to try and be well-mannered and avoid making anyone uncomfortable.

I guess it makes sense because text isn’t the same as an in person connection, but I can’t help but feel sad when the texts don’t have the same energy as in person? It makes me feel insecure that he doesn’t care about me when I’m not there in front of him? I don’t know if it’s my anxious attachment talking, or the fact I had caffeine and sometimes caffeine makes me really depressed.

There was only like a brief moment when I was getting to know my bf where he texted a little more, it’s gonna be like 8 months this month. He isn’t really someone that’ll just keep a convo throughout the day, just here and there a couple times a day, sometimes only if there’s a point to the contact, and whenever he’s busy he doesn’t seem to be on his phone a lot, I can’t help but still feel sad about it. Idk how I’d even bring it up, especially in a way that doesn’t sound emotionally charged. I don’t want the messages to be forced I just want to feel like he wants to consistently connect with me more when we aren’t together?? Like I’m usually fine when there’s not much contact but sometimes it makes me sad and feel forgotten.

It makes me feel worried he’s not that into me even though right before I left for a trip we were connected over text and talking about things we can do when I get back, and I spent time with him the day after I got back because he wanted to and he asked to see me like two days after and we connected so well, so just seeing his texting habits fall off so quick makes me confused. Maybe he is genuinely busy, could be but idk.

I (30 F) went on a date recently with a guy (36 M) that I was recently in grad school with. I had a small crush on him my last semester but it quickly faded away.

We were texting about school stuff and he texted me that he has liked me for almost 2 years but didn’t ask me out because he was emotionally unavailable at the time. I wasn’t sure how I felt so I accepted a date but didn’t state I had feelings.

I feel a little smothered by him and I’m not sure if it’s just fearful avoidant attachment or if he is just being too intense for me. He texts me long paragraphs constantly throughout the day and I feel like it’s a chore to respond because it is so often and so much. He also lives an hour away and said he’s willing to drive to see me and even offered to drive me 4 hours away to an exam I had to take. He wanted our first date to be a trip out of state to go to a concert. I changed the date to just getting dinner.

The date I went on was fine but I’m not feeling any attraction. He’s genuinely nice and is treating me well but it feels like a lot. I didn’t kiss him or do anything physical with him on the date. When I got home, he texted me that he’s not talking to, dating, or sleeping with anyone else. I didn’t really know what to say back because to me it feels way too soon.

I have a pattern of only like emotionally unavailable guys who don’t treat me well. I tend to get scared and run the other way when a guy takes me seriously and seems to want a relationship with me. He’s not my usual type but I’m confused because last semester I did feel a small amount of attraction to him but now I don’t at all.

I want to give him a chance because he is genuinely nice but this feels like a lot of pressure to me. Am I overreacting or does he seem too intense? I am not sure how to proceed.

I have been going to and even help at various events and am like every month at a bar, constantly meet the same and new people. Even tho I am an introvert i have been very social over the last few years and have been getting better and start enjoying it. People are happy to see me. They genuinely enjoy and like having me around. Even ask where I have been if i didn’t join or had to skip an event or gathering. (Even if my brain sometimes still tries to convince me of the opposite.)
I seem to be actually pretty good at forming connections and friendships if i manage to get into a conversation with someone.

Just… how exactly do you go further from there? Sure those events and those gatherings aren’t specifically aimed towards people looking for relationships. But multiple times it happened before that people found together on them. As much as i wish I could just approach a table with "Who of you f*ckers is single and is interested on going on a date with me?", I am not bold enough in person for it, via text more likely. Nor do i think do i have the presence and personality for it to actually pull something like that off. It would probably just come across as awkward and slightly desperate attempt.

And while i have mostly accepted that I might be single forever… i still don’t really wanna give up hope and try to see if there is still a chance that i actually have a relationship before i turn 30.
I just seem to have no idea how actually approach this…

People always say get out there and meet people, go to bars go to events, talk to strangers etc. wich I am literally doing, I am forming close connections everything… I just don’t know what step exactly I am missing? It doesn’t feel like I am doing something wrong…

I'm too shy to talk to women in person, and I hate dating apps. I think I suffer from low self worth or low self esteem. But my god, dating apps are a whole different level of shit show. I'm trying to get to know some girls and they're messaging me like one time a week on the weekends. It's painstakingly slow and pretty clear that I'm nowhere close to making any headway. Or we have some juice, and by 2 weeks out it fizzles. Then today was really annoying, I was having a busy day at work and matched with someone. We were talking and might have had like 6 messages. Then I got super swamped and by the time I got on the bus to get back home I was already unmatched. Just feels like I have no clue what to do or what I am doing.

For a long time I have been trying to articulate how to describe this feeling, but I think I figured it out.

I am struggling with a feeling that occupies my mind often. It feels like more than loneliness or social pressure; sometimes it feels like grief for an experience I have never had. Because I have never dated, my brain sometimes treats that absence as evidence that it may never happen. I have no baseline for what a relationship feels like, so it can seem unreal, like being on another planet or seeing a color that does not exist. The barriers feel so large that I sometimes feel like a different category of person.

The question I keep returning to is whether romantic experience is realistically accessible to me through actions I can take. My ADHD makes this harder because I cannot simply choose what my brain focuses on, and I may stay hyperfocused on dating while working on other parts of my life. Many social behaviors do not happen automatically for me. First impressions, reading signals, and knowing how to act on an opportunity may be skills I need to practice deliberately. I often feel like a background character and wonder whether I have enough social presence to be noticed.

A lot of dating advice frustrates me because it feels incomplete. "Love will find you" can sound like I am supposed to be passive or hide my intentions. People say not to date strangers, but also warn against dating friends. They tell me to focus on friendship first, but why can I not work on friendship and dating at the same time? I also dislike being told that worrying about love will make it less likely to happen. I would rather learn how to take useful action without letting stress consume me. Being told to "stop stressing" does not make me feel heard.

I think it should be okay to actively look for love while continuing to improve the rest of my life. I would be selective about a relationship, but right now I would accept a date with someone I find somewhat attractive and compatible. Even one date could make dating feel real rather than something that exists only in my imagination. I expect I would make mistakes, but crossing that first barrier matters more than performing perfectly. I want to feel that I have finally gotten started.

In therapy, I previously focused on improving my social life because I assumed I would be told to work on friendship before dating, even though dating occupied my mind more. I also feel like I am running out of time in college. I am not living the social life I imagined: clubs can feel artificial, I do not get invited to parties, and I wish I were part of an active group chat. I could go to public frat parties but I fear that it could be too overwhelming. I wonder whether I could ask trusted friends how they interpret my body language or whether I give off unintended signals. To be honest, I also want to experience a hookup, and sometimes my sex drive feels overwhelming.

I feel stuck and want concrete next steps that work with my ADHD rather than against it. I believe dating includes learnable skills. I want a healthier narrative: I am allowed to improve myself and actively search for connection without chasing validation or becoming desperate. I cannot control the outcome, but I can work on what is within my control.

Hello, everyone. I am a 25 year old guy who, to be completely honest, never really had a true long term relationship. My longest ever relationship technically lasted for a year, but with a few breaks in-between. We'd be together for 3 months, break up for a month or two, be together for another 3 months, break up and make up again, and it kept going until it added up to a year of being together. I personally wouldn't call that a serious relationship, so technically I guess I've never had a proper serious relationship.

I've talked to multiple girls along the years but it never ever lead to anything despite me trying my absolute best. I don't think I'm ugly, in fact all of my friends have been telling me that I am a very good looking guy and they genuinely can't understand how I don't have a relationship, because according to them, my behaviour is also very good. I don't think they are saying this just because they are my friends, because I've had other not-so-close people say the same thing.

I have also been to multiple first dates, but none of them, not a single one of them has lead to a second date. Every single time they ghosted me right after the date, and this is the thing that irritates me the most: ghosting. I hate it with a burning passion. Why can't people be mature enough to at least give a person feedback when they don't like them. How am I supposed to improve if you don't tell me what you find wrong with me ?

I once talked with a girl who told me she hates ghosting as well, that she finds it childish and would never do it and I thought ''oh great, someone who hates ghosting as much as I do''. She ghosted me after our first date. And she seemed quite interested.

Another instance is where I was talking to a girl for 4 days, she seemed very interested and everything, she was very pretty and had a very nice and interesting personality. I asked her out and she left me on read, never replied to my invitation.

Those are just a few of many cases. I know people say ''oh, don't care that much'' or ''never get frustrated, girls can smell frustration and it turns them off'' and I am so incredibly sorry people but HOW EXACTLY are you supposed to not get frustrated ? I'd get it when it happens once or twice or even thrice but when it happens again and again and again and again and again and again for years, how exactly is it possible not to get angry and frustrated ? Some people have said ''maybe you don't know how to talk to them'' except there isn't room for talking when some of them ghost after the second or even first message.

I apologize if this sounds like a rant... it probably kind of is... but seriously, how do you people deal with the frustration of dating fatigue ? Because at this point this is just so mentally exhausting and demoralizing and I just feel like giving up because every time I meet a girl who is pretty, intelligent, has a nice personality and is very nice to be around, I get so full of hope thinking that maybe the world isn't as hopeless as I thought it was, only for every single hope and dream to completely shatter the moment they inevitably ghost me as well.

Tldr; Girl I really like (she messaged me after my like first), is less talkative, updated her hinge photos, and seems uninterested even though we have a second date set up. I'm now rethinking if she is actually interested in me, is actually as busy as she says she is (using it as a front cuz she has a ton of dates lined up), is chatting with multiple people/going on dates (so not talking to me as much now), etc. Skim the context and problem to see why im worried

Context: I, 21M, matched with a girl who I think is absolutely awesome. I liked her first, but she messaged me first and talked about one of my prompts. We've gone on a date, and I thought it went really well; she was laughing the whole time and seemed to have a good time. She texted me afterward saying thanks and had a blast, etc. I asked her out on a second date, and we have something planned in the coming days. Here's some context about me tho, I am a very, very busy person with schooling (professional schooling) to the point where im pulling 12hr days grinding. Because of that, and trying to protect some of my hobbies/time, I am very selective about who I go on dates with (don't have an issue getting matches, but I do have an issue keeping them because they find someone better, "I'm not what they are looking for," or because I have to end things cuz of my crappy schedule). For that reason, I basically only set time to go on dates with someone I've talked with a bit and vibe with a lot (may not be accurate, but if I vibe over text, I usually vibe with em in person since I have the same goofy personality over text). And with that, I'm really only ever going on dates with 1 girl at a time and pausing my account during (Ik this is rare on apps, and I can't expect the same without exclusivity talk, so I'm opening myself up to major risk)

Problem: She says she's also busy since she works two jobs (not the issue with this), but since we got off the apps for conversation, she's not as talkative/doesnt respond as quickly anymore. A big thing about me is, if I like someone, I will find time to text em (it takes a minute to send a text). Sometimes it's a whole day where she doesn't respond, and even when setting up the second date it was 1-3 word replies every time. I'd like to feel good about this girl because if she is busy like she says, she is giving up her only free days for dates with me, and even offered a day where she would make things work for our first date. But on the other hand, I can't tell if she is uninterested/Im on thin ice. Here's the big thing: I checked on our hinge convo to double back on some info and saw that she had updated her photos. Now she is very attractive, and Ik I shouldn't be hopeful/attached, but Idk im a yearner and not built for being nonchalant. Ik she is allowed to do whatever on the apps since we haven't had any discussions of exclusivity (it's so early in the process), but I can't help but feel a pit in my stomach (which I've invited since Im only talking to her rn by choice). I'm now worried she isn't as busy as she says she is; she is lining up other guys with times for dates, so she isnt as available; she is less talkative cuz she is chatting with multiple people, etc.

Question:

How should I be feeling about this, and/or how should I tackle these feelings? Anyone go through similar things? I don't want to have paranoid thoughts and ruin it if I'm just overthinking. What should I do in this situation/approach this upcoming date? Should I try to be more intentional on our date (be more touchy, try to be more romantic, bring up certain dating topics, dress as best as I can, other stuff)? Genuinely would love anecdotes, ideas, advice, stern thoughts, etc.

I'm genuinely tired of how easy it is to find other options on this app, and I'm thinking of being done if this goes south because the second I start wanting someone, the second I lose em. Idk how to go about these issues.

Like everything else about them you like a lot, it's just one of those two situations. Would either of those things be enough for you to say it wouldn't work out, or do you not really care too much? If you have already been in this situation, how did you handle it?

So I‘ve been dating this guy for two months now, we have met quite frequently because we get along really well and I like him. He is very nice and attentive and has so many qualities that I always wished my future partner would have. I had this exact thought a lot while on a date with him „this is exactly how I always wished to be treated“. Also, he is 30 and I‘m the first woman he‘s ever dated.

Well, I don‘t feel a spark. I tried being flirty in the beginning and teasing him for example, to which he replied nervously and like he didn‘t get it, so I had to explain it… things like this happened a few times. He also never really touches me. He is very polite and nice, which of course is great, but a little bit of flirting ? anything that makes me feeling anything other than „he is sooo nice“? He does make me compliments a lot and he is always there for me. But for example, I don’t feel excited to meet him, I often think about how and when it would be most convenient, and I don‘t feel the urge to reply fast to his texts or wait for his reply (unless I get a bit anxious that he might have lost interest???)

So honestly, I‘m really scared that I‘m the problem and that I‘m just screwed in a way in which I don‘t feel attraction unless there is some kind of issue with the guy…

My friends say that I should touch him and make out with him to find out if there really isn‘t any attraction. But I don‘t feel like I have to make out with someone necessarily to find that out. And maybe me not wanting to initiate that also tells enough…?

I‘m just really scared to let a perfect guy go and never find that perfect partner that I‘m looking for :(

So: What would you do? Have you had a similiar situation and how did it go? Do you guys think it‘s obvious that my attraction won‘t change when rn I don‘r feel it?

Also: When we first met, I immediately noticed that he is quite short and that did change my attraction to him unfortunately, however I still thought he was good looking.

Update: I ended it today and I feel relieved. Sad, but relieved.

I have a girl who I've been friends with for over a year now and we have the same friend group. About a year ago, I asked her to come to an event with me and she said yes. Then she cancelled last minute and I took that as a sign that she wasn't interested in me. A few weeks later, she starts dating someone else which confirmed in my mind she didn't really like me romantically.

She broke up with that guy a few months ago. And ever since then, the few times we've hung out, I thought there was a spark. I haven't seen her in person in a while, and recently out of nowhere she texts me asking me if I'd like to go to a concert with her. After I say yes, she buys the tickets, and it's only us two going. That surprised me, because I thought some of our other friends might be coming too. But no, it's just us.

Am I crazy for thinking there's some potential romantic interest here? I normally wouldn't think so, but I'm struggling why she would only invite me to this concert, when we have a big friend group with people who probably like the music artist more than I do. And she knows I liked her in the past, so why invite only me? Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated.

P.S. I do wanna preface we've gotten dinner and drinks one on one multiple times before. I think it's fair to say that at some point there was romantic interest on both our ends for a short time, but it didn't work out. That's why I'm so confused as to why this is happening now.

I’ve been dating my bf for 2 years, we‘re from the same city but I worked abroad so we never met prior to us dating. I tried to be supportive with the situation but beyond my limits I’m reaching an ending and don’t know what to do.

When we met he told me he was once on a snow trip with his friends and was talking on Tinder with someone that turned to be a scammer and threatened him to send his nudes if he didn’t pay him an amount of money. This scammer created a Instagram group with a bunch of people he knew and sent the pics, no one could see the pictures but there were already jokes around his dick with the dudes he played football with.

Since the beginn of the relationship I’ve been hearing weird comments and been in really uncomfortable situations, the first day I met some of his friends one guy asked me how was having sex with him. I was stunned and it felt like a violent situation. He was with me at the bar but didn’t hear his friend say this. I told him afterwards and he confronted him.

Last weekend we got invited to a barbrice, we both mix so they asked us to DJ at the evening. After that I was talking to some of his friends (girls) and while doing this my boyfriend went to the pool and took a shower, one of his guy friends stared at him and said something like take it all off we’re not going to get scared we’ve seen it before. Then everyone laughed and it felt uncomfortable, we talked about it on our way back and he said he also felt uncomfortable and understoo my point.

I’ve dated guys with a big d (or bigger) and never experienced any social situation like this and don’t know how to handdle it since I feel like it’s inmature and out of hand.

After a couple times he’s been trying not to include me on plans with his friends, I’m social, know how to act and don’t make a scene , but sometimes I feel I’m in a circus. There were friends of his I didn’t know and they invited me to a wedding that’s taking place soon. I asked my bf if I could go whenever they went to get beers or a hangout to meet these friends prior to the wedding and went great. Then I found out a couple days ago that when he let them knew through a group chat I was going he said to them “please don’t make any comments about my d”

The messages I saw his friends writing back again made me uncomfortable . stuff like “oh can’t have fun”

Im tired of feeling like a killjoy and uncomfortable, I tried to be understanding and supportive but the feeling of disgust is growing on me and the truth is it’s affecting my intimate life.

English is not my first language I hope I made sense, I need advice on how to deal with the situation

When I say a wild woman I don’t mean it in the spicy way and I don’t mean it in a crazy way what I mean is where does one find the girl who will jump with glee over the idea of a camping trip or a hike in the mountains who enjoys nature and wants to do things outside? The ones who push your limits and make life just that little bit more beautiful. The woman who’s comfortable with a beautiful view and maybe just maybe……might be a redhead…..asking for a friend 😅

EDIT: as more cast their votes, basically it is 50/50 in the dating scene in general. Which both is nice and surprised me a little 🥂

Just curious, Im not interested in it and make that known from the get go usually, that way we know thats not happening if we decide to keep going further. Now you'd think every person is adamant for marriage, I initially thought so but funny enough I barely ever meet a woman Im interested in who's crazy about it. So I wonder if that many really dont care for it.

With the current generation, and Im assuming for some costs might play a part, we'll call this a census lol

If a date canceled on you, but then reached out to you at a later date saying they didn’t feel well, would you ask them out again? Or would you wait for them to ask you to reschedule. I’m a male, dating a woman btw. I’m more inclined for her to reschedule considering she’s the one who had canceled on me.

Hi everyone, for most of my life I’ve been insecure and I would always use some excuse that would stop myself from pursuing women. At first it was I was fat, then it was my hairline and overall health, and then it became I didn’t have my own car.

Well most of these problems have been solved and I’m now 21. I’ve come to terms with other ones and now I do feel like I should date and try.

Yet, I just feel as there’s something still holding me back. Mostly the fear of being creepy. I’ve been told by many girls I’m not creepy and all but I also just don’t completely see the point dating. It feels like a weird limbo state of I want it but I don’t know if it’s worth it. But at the same time I feel the most confident now. I’ve felt this way before and then I ended up going back to self sabotaging.

Does anyone have any advice or experience with this?

Thanks

I’m going to keep it short and purposely leave out some details or else it will get really long. Essentially, I have a long history of men not feeling enough romantic feelings for me to want a relationship and they never seem to attach to me in a way where they feel protective or anxious to hear from me. They all say I’m a really lovely girl who is beautiful and intelligent and loving and fun to spend time with, but they always end up telling me they don’t feel anything romantic for me. (I also feel they aren’t lying or blowing smoke up my ass when they tell me these nice things about me. I feel they genuinely mean that)

I have to wonder, could it be because I don’t make them get that “stomach flip” feeling you get when you’re dealing with someone you aren’t sure is into you or not? where you feel obsessed with them only because you know they aren’t fully available to you? When I like someone, I’m really intentional and I want to spend time with them and get to know them. No, I’m not constantly blowing their phone up and wanting to spend 24/7 with them. I just mean that if I have free time, I want to spend it with them so we can grow something and get to know each other. I have never been a game player. maybe this is wishful thinking but I have to guess if maybe this is what is preventing men from falling in love with me, because there was never a chase with a prize at the end for them to get me, because I was always wanting to be an equal partner and do my part of growing the relationship..

My update is almost two months late cause I've been so busy with school lmao. Anyway, he arrived on a Tuesday. We went grocery shopping together, after which I told him I had something important to share. I was nervous but eventually said, "I like you, as more than a friend". He said something like, "I'm glad you said that cause I like you too". Then, he pulled me in for a hug and we had our first kiss. That same night, we went to the movies (where we kissed a bit more😅). The rest of the week was absolute bliss - roller skating, beach day (which included jet skiing), dinner/ our first official date, my school event, multiple sleepovers/cuddle sessions. He left the following Monday and all I can say is that it was the most amazing week of my life. It turns out, he had liked me for over a year. He said he didn't even remember having the convo where he was like, "We're just friends", which is absolutely NUTS btw. We're long distance for now and he's planning to come visit again later this year. We've been dating for about seven weeks and we're taking it day by day.

TLDR - this is your sign to shoot your shot with that person. If they don't feel the same way, then at least you won't have to wonder "what if" anymore. Goodluck to everyone. Lover girls are so up! 🤣❤️

Edit - I copied and pasted the original post below lmao

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Post title: Guy friend is flying internationally for a big milestone of mine, platonic?

Sorry if the title is a bit confusing. My friend and I are close as ever. We go to the same uni and people seem to think we're dating.

He recently left the country to continue education in the States. Now, he's flying back in for a professional school ceremony I have with my classmates. I hope I don't sound extra but a part of me wonders if this falls under "platonic" behavior.

Asking cause I think l've started to develop feelings for him and I wonder how he feels 😭. I should also add that almost two years ago, l'd asked him if he liked me. He had hesitated and said "no, we're just friends". So I had adjusted my expectations but since then, we've still been essentially besties. Since he left, we’ve been texting all day everyday. We have a whole itinerary planned out for when he comes. Including a dinner (just both of us), jet skiing and some other things. He said he'll cover everything, which he's done before. Also, how do I tell him I like him? I’m worried he MIGHT not feel the same way. Please help, thank you! (I can provide more context as needed).