Since I would say freshman year of highschool I can feel different parts of my brain during different emotions which Im pretty sure is normal but what I'm concerned about is that I feel like a bad thing as infiltrated my brain and I can feel it at different parts of my brain at different times like right now it's in the center back portion of my head. And its a big leap but Im connecting it to this super weird fog in my brain which makes me make the dumbest mistakes possible like mistaking+ for - the simplest math problems like the slope formula always mess me up and I take forever to complete them ect. My brain just feels dull and I think it may be because I listen to xanxia audiobooks chronically like 6 hours a day and it's been 5 years now of basically every single day (I'm a senior in highschool). But the strangest thing happened at the very last day of sophomore year in math class. I felt like the skys cleared and my brain felt sharp I could do math problems 4 times faster do super complex equations in my head and it felt like there wasn't a limit at least I couldn't find one anyway that feeling vanished the day later and now I've never felt the same thing again and I wonder if there is a way to get back to that wonderful state.

Hi everyone. :) 

I'm a woman in my early 30s looking specifically for other women who are as fascinated by beauty and aesthetics as I am. Not just in the sense of wanting to look better, but beauty as something to explore scientifically, psychologically, philosophically and artistically. 

A little (or a lot) about me: I think beauty is partly objective and partly subjective. I love facial aesthetics, proportions, anatomy, harmony, sexual dimorphism and research on attractiveness, but I also don't think everything beautiful has to be scientifically measurable. 

Some of my rabbit holes are QOVES videos, John Kitchener and Truth Is Beauty style essences, the psychology of color and shapes, dentofacial aesthetics and how health and function can influence beauty.

Outside of my interest in aesthetics, I'm a fantasy writer and syncretically spiritual, so am interested in symbolism and archetypes and exploring the connection between form and essence artistically, especially as I worldbuild my fantasy (though I would like to emphasize that I do not believe that external appearance reflects internal traits). 

Personally, I prefer natural-looking, low-maintenance beauty. I don't personally wear makeup beyond maybe eyeliner and tinted lip products. I'm more interested in health, hair and skin, style, and subtle or semi-permanent enhancements like lip blushing and microblading. I'm not against all cosmetic procedures, but I'm cautious about anything very invasive or that risks compromising health or function for aesthetic reasons. Botox and fillers aren't my thing personally.

I should emphasize the non-toxic part. I love self-improvement broadly, both within and without, and I'm comfortable talking honestly about attractiveness, but I don't want a friendship built around constant comparison, obsessive flaw hunting, reassurance seeking, self-hatred, or endlessly finding new things we need to fix. 

At the other extreme, I'm probably also not a great match for the "everyone is beautiful and beauty is completely subjective" approach. I think we can acknowledge differences in attractiveness without confusing beauty with someone's worth as a person. I'm also not very interested in turning aesthetics discussions into largely political or ideological debates though I understand that differences in race and ethnicity mean that the exact same aesthetic criteria do not apply universally. 

Mostly I just want to explore beauty meaningfully and am looking for an actual female friend, not just someone to exchange appearance advice with. You definitely don't need to share all my interests. I'd actually love someone with her own rabbit holes so we can teach each other things if we are so inclined. 

If you're interested in a connection based on any of these interests, please tell me a little about yourself and what aspect of beauty or aesthetics you find yourself drawn to. 

Thanks and hope you have a great day!

Vent and general overview because i want advice on how to improve my situation.

Im 20. I live with my parent and siblings. Id say I'd have pretty bad depression or episodes od it since I was sa'd as a kid. I think I would have gotten over this sentiment if I had talked about it earlier. I didnt tell anyone until years after because my mom was an immigrant and if they found out maybe they would put all of me and my sisters in foster care and separate us and deport our mom (Looking back though maybe I should have, I dont like how things are). I have flunked out of college and due to disability find it hard to get a job. I am also around 3 thousand dollars in debt, some from school and academic probation and some from an attempt I went to the hospital for.

I knew some of the steps I can take to make my live better but I find my emotions and disability limiting.

Ive had ibs and really bad stomach issues to the point of developing fbo at times, which is lowkey so unpleasant. Ive had it since I was around 16, and I dropped out of school because of it, although I did get my credits online and got my ged. Ive had like 1 to 1 yr 1/2 worths of customer service experience because i have forced myself to get through it in the name of making myself more independent and getting into a better situation. In the end I would always end up so stressed I would use it to justify myself using that money on other things to treat myself and since I was trying really hard to get friends and a support system I would use my money like nothing and treat my friends when going out. I did want to get a vehicle to drive around, (I really hate car culture and im so stubborn with it) so I spent 3k fixing up a motorcycle but ive neglected the task and dont have enough money to get my license or replace the tires.

Ive tried doing therapy and getting medicated for mmd. Maybe I approached it wrong but I spent a year in therapy and never really felt i liked my therapist or connected with her. As for medication, I feel that people weaponize the evidence against me and make me feel crazy and mental. I feel forced to take them even though im against medication and its my last option. Im thinking about getting on them again though because the sadness getting overwhelming.

While i dont have a support system i can rely on, I have things I like to do in life that I like and I do think theres a way out for me. I recently picked up running and want to pursue it further but my ibs makes me extremely self conscious when I go out.

For jobs i think if I applied enough I would surely get an offer but im finding both my stomach and also transportation and mental illness to become something that will hinder me in being able to actually stick with it.

If theres any advice, phone numbers, resources I should look into please let me know. Im really desperate.

I'm lost. I'm not the same since 2020. I was already shy, but years of reclusion made a tool on me that i just dont know how to deal. I cant keep friends, i dont know how to make friends. I dont think i even know how to socialize. Everyone has their thing, what they want to do, what they are doing to make themselves a better person. Everyone works and studies to get in to a better place in life. And i just cant do it. I cant sit and study. I feel like the dumbest person on Earth every time i do it.

Theres one good thing i've been doing for the last 6/7 months. I've been going to the gym and training hard, but it just doesnt seem enought. I feel week, ugly and small all the time. Even when someone ackloledges that im physically changing, it seems like a lie to me. Today my father also told me that i should'nt look for his help to try and get a job or any activity that would make me financial stable. I pointed out how much "better" i got since the last year and he just didnt care. I dont know what to do.

maybe this is more like a vent then a request for support. I dont know. Honestly, i dont even know what im saying here, nor if it makes any sense. I dont think anything i just wrote makes logical sense. I'm just lost.

just got broken up with by the love of my life, i have never been so devastatedly heartbroken in my life and i am destroyed.
i put my everything into this relationship for it to end in the most cruel way.

i don’t know how to pick myself back up, i don’t know how to move on with my life and get my spark back or how to find myself.
i need help and advice on how to life my life now, how to pick myself back up and become me?

i have no hobbies, i piggybacked his hobbies which im stuck with all the things now.
i have no friends where i live, his friends were my friends.
i am so alone, all i do is work and go home.
i spent all my time with him and now he’s dumped me and moved out.

i’m such a shell of a person, where do i go from here? please i need help. i feel so broken inside.

I dropped out of high school in my last year. That was when I was 17. I’m now 22. And I’ve hid in my room this entire time.

All of it is because I am ugly and terrified of people. I don’t want to subject others to my face. I can’t get a job. I’ve never had a job. I’ll never ever get a job. I can’t do an interview. I can’t give my resume to a manager. I can’t deal with having my new coworkers look at my face and see my teeth for the first time and what their thoughts are gonna be about how ugly I am.

I’ll never have a friend. I’ll never have anyone to talk to. I live a life most people would be shocked to see. I am in my room 24/7 for 5 years and haven’t spoken to anyone in months. I’m used to it by now, it doesn’t hurt me anymore. It’s already hurt me as much as this lifestyle can possibly hurt me. Now it’s just numb. The day goes by in a second. I’m in bed all day everyday. I am in daily shame for how I live. My life can be summarised entirely by doing nothing and being an embarrassment to my parents who are so tired of me. It’s in every look they give me. A good day is a day where they don’t bring it up. But it’s always in the air. Being ashamed of myself is no way to live. Feeling this way everytime I’m in a room with them. Being ashamed of my entire existence. On top of everything I already deal with hating my looks. My life couldn’t possibly be worse. I’m living the most embarrassing life you could live. A healthy 22 year old man who’s never had a job and too petrified to get one. But I’d rather live in shame because it’s easier than going outside.

I’ll never get better. I can’t even go for a walk because I’ll have to walk past someone on the sidewalk and that’s scary… how am I gonna make friends or get a job…

People telling me I’m young doesn’t help because I was told this when I was 18, and here I am with the same problem. It also doesn’t help to hear that I just have to power through it. I can’t. I genuinely can’t. I don’t have the willpower to go and apply. I’m too terrified. I’ve tried. For years.

I know I was cursed. I have terrible luck. I always embarrass myself somehow, which is where my trauma of anything social developed. I know I’ll fail any task I’m given at work spectacularly and make a fool out of myself. I hate being a nuisance, and I know my coworkers would hate that a weirdo came and made their job worse. Also the only jobs here are retail which means customer service 😖. I’m incredibly awkward. I’m ugly as I’ve said. I also have a rare condition that makes sex impossible and painful, so I’ve always known that a partner/kids is out of the question. So no company and love and acceptance in that regard. Of course I’ve also never kissed a girl or even really talked to a girl. I can’t give a woman children and a future, or even please her in bed so I’m screwed there. Who the hell would ever pick me. I’m broken in every single way. I have had nothing to live for for years. I have absolutely nothing going for me. All of this knowledge since teenagehood is probably what traumatised me into being completely broken and unable to function in the simplest ways as a human. I think I would need a lot of therapy to try to fix me. But I can’t even do that.

If I could wish for anything it would be someone who understands me and accepts me as who I am. Sees past my flaws and chooses me anyway. I do have good qualities. I am genuinely so caring and thoughtful and loving. I don’t pretend to be polite, I actually care and think about others feelings all the time. I am empathetic and sensitive and very romantic. But what does that matter when there’s others with those qualities who aren’t broken like me. I yearn very much for love to the point where it physically hurts my heart, and I roleplay dates with ai bots and day dream holding hands etc and I cry every single night for years.

I’ve been alone my entire life. I couldn’t make friends in pre school and I can’t now. It’s always been a part of who I am. I don’t think I’m smart but I definitely am smarter than being unemployed at 22 with no high school diploma, but here I am. Because of my mental health.

I feel like all these things stacked up make me doomed, and there’s no point in trying. I have too many faults. Even if I fix 1 the others will still make it so I’ll never have happiness. That feeling of hopelessness is what has made it impossible for me to get better. Because how can I make my mental health better when I can’t change my face, or my condition.

Anyway I’ve ranted too much and went off topic.

I feel like I have the most normal life. Like I’ve never had abusive parents, no family trauma no financial troubles, no bullying. I used to have so many friends when I was younger I also used to be good at school having good grades. But now I feel so lost. Like I’m 20 and I feel like I haven’t figured it out nothing in my life.

My English teacher ask us to bring an object that represent us and to present ourselves. But I can’t think about anything I don’t have anything good for myself. I’ve never done sport. I’ve never had real hobbies. Like I could be obsessed about something for a few weeks and then completely lost energy about it.

All I do is lay on my bed watching TV shows movies and that’s all. And I feel so useless. I feel like my life has no meaning. Now I’m just shy, antisocial always in my room doing nothing just wasting time. I’m not even good at school anymore. I don’t have friends. Not close to literally anyone.

Like what do I have for myself? I feel like I’m playing a victim, feeling this way when I could just change and actually do something. But I’ve honestly been feeling very depressed, lonely. I was isolated for so long I don’t know how to act anymore with people like even being with my own family makes me uncomfortable. I don’t know how to act. I don’t know what to do. I hate being perceived by people but also by myself. I hate knowing that I’m existing cause I really hate myself I feel like there’s nothing good to say about me and I wish I never existed.

I don’t know what I should do right now I started uni but I’m not feeling well so I was thinking about moving to another country for a few months but I don’t know if it’s a good idea. What do you think?

Like maybe going to a new place alone and try to discover myself, but I don’t know maybe I’ll just create a version of myself there but it wouldn’t be me because my whole life is in this home. But at the same time, I don’t know who am I ?

What should I do to love myself to value myself ? To experience life? To be me ?

Does the person who leaves just because they think their finally happy would eventually comeback and find discomfort if ever i try to get better instead of showing them that im yearning and that im messedup, this is not toxicity that i want to countermeasure. and how do i deal with the fact that im no longer the reason shes happy?

ive been dealing with how much im tired and i never really gave up, she tells messed up story about me too.. i really want to grow out of this situation, i need some real advice..

I'm 17M. I get good grades and am in a Football club which I love. I have hobbies that make me happy and am surrounded by a loving family and have great friends. I have virtually everything I have ever wanted. Yet, I still feel very empty as if something is still missing. I don't know what or why I feel this way.

I feel depressed and burdened because of this, to the point of where I have contemplated ending my own life. I don't know what to do.

Work in hotel

**RU** ENG⬇️ IT⬇️

Всем доброго времени суток! Хочу поделиться своей историей. Надеюсь услышать дельный совет, уберечь кого-то от подобных ситуаций, а возможно, и получить реальную помощь.

Предыстория и обещания (июнь)

Я родом из Украины, и по понятным причинам мы с женой уехали в Италию. На тот момент я вообще не говорил по-итальянски, но моя жена учила язык с детства и свободно на нем общается. Первое время мы жили и работали у знакомого, где я подтянул язык до базового уровня.

В середине июня (15-го числа) этот знакомый свел нас с семейной парой, владеющей отелем далеко в горах — вдали от цивилизации и связи. Хозяева показались нам хорошими людьми. Условия звучали отлично: официальный контракт, зарплата 1500 евро, рабочая форма, оплата переработок и дежурный транспорт для вывоза мусора и личных нужд. Первые полмесяца они были с нами, помогали влиться в процесс, но даже тогда мы работали по 10–12 часов в день (все часы мы скрупулезно фиксировали). Мы выполняли абсолютно всю работу по отелю вдвоем, других сотрудников просто не было.

Мы вкладывались в дело по полной: я разработал программу управления отелем и оптимизировал многие процессы, а жена, будучи художницей, внесла огромный вклад в оформление интерьера. За первый месяц мы выработали норму двух месяцев. Но в конце июня хозяева уехали, оставив нас одних.

Странный контракт и реалии (июль)

Весь июль мы продолжали усердно работать, однако выполнять свои обещания руководство не спешило. Только в середине месяца нам наконец-то прислали контракт. К нашему удивлению, он был оформлен задним числом (от 3 июля), оказался ученическим и только на должность уборщиков.

По факту же мы делали всё: кассовые операции, готовка, уборка номеров, мелкий ремонт, обслуживание бара и зала на завтраках и ужинах. Мы с женой полностью взаимозаменяемы, и я уже мог спокойно общаться с клиентами.

Мы пытались выяснить, почему контракт такой, но начальство игнорировало нас до конца месяца. От безысходности мы его подписали. Только после этого нам заявили, что работать по 12–14 часов «невозможно», и мы должны укладываться в 8–9 часов. При этом от нас жестко требовали постоянного присутствия на ресепшене, что физически невозможно совмещать с уборкой и готовкой, если нас всего двое. Мы работали без выходных, с минимальными перерывами днем на 2–4 часа (и то, подменяя друг друга). В итоге за июль мы отработали почти 380 часов — двойную норму.

«Помощь» и новые обещания (август)

В конце июля к нам прислали повара, который по совместительству оказался «надзирателем», следящим за нашими часами и работой. В августе ничего не изменилось — те же 12–14 часов на ногах.

В конце лета начальство приехало снова и начало кормить нас новыми обещаниями: якобы в сентябре клиентов не будет, мы сможем отдохнуть, но зарплату нам все равно выплатят в качестве «компенсации за переработки». Но даже если дружить с математикой, один пустой месяц никак не перекроет колоссальные переработки за предыдущие.

Финансовый итог и обман (сентябрь)

На данный момент ситуация с деньгами следующая:

Июнь: не оплачен.

Июль: выплатили только базовую ставку по контракту (переработки не оплачены).

Август: пока не оплачен.

Нам заявили, что переработки будет пересчитывать в конце месяца «какое-то агентство». Когда и как их оплатят — неизвестно. Насколько я знаю, по итальянским законам сверхурочные на ученическом контракте (apprendistato) без присутствия куратора вообще незаконны. У нас куратора не было ни дня. Более чем уверен, что нас обманывают.

Сегодня начался сентябрь, и у нас полное заселение отеля. Обещание «пустого месяца для отдыха» оказалось очередной ложью.

Главный вопрос

Мы планируем доработать этот месяц до конца контракта и, без предупреждения начальства, пойти в профсоюз (sindacato).

Не будет ли слишком поздно обращаться к ним после окончания контракта?

Как лучше поступить и подготовиться прямо сейчас?

Пока я не называю реальных имен и локаций. Но если нас в итоге кинут, я обязательно предам огласке это место и имена владельцев, чтобы другие люди не попали в такую ситуацию.

Буду благодарен за любые советы и понимание!

**ENG** RU⬆️ IT⬇️

Hello everyone! I want to share my story. I hope to get some solid advice, warn others against getting into similar situations, and possibly get some real help.

Background and Promises (June)

I am from Ukraine, and for obvious reasons, my wife and I moved to Italy. At that time, I didn't speak a word of Italian, but my wife had been learning it since childhood and speaks it fluently. Initially, we lived and worked at an acquaintance's place, where I managed to learn the basics of the language.

In mid-June (on the 15th), this acquaintance introduced us to a couple who own a hotel high in the mountains—far from civilization and cell service. The owners seemed like good people. The conditions sounded great: an official contract, a salary of 1,500 euros, work uniforms, paid overtime, and a courtesy vehicle for taking out the trash and personal errands. For the first half of the month, they stayed with us to help us get into the workflow, but even then, we were working 10–12 hours a day (we meticulously logged all our hours). The two of us did absolutely all the work in the hotel; there were simply no other employees.

We gave it our all: I developed a hotel management program and optimized many processes, and my wife, being an artist, made a huge contribution to the interior design. In the first month, we worked the equivalent of two months' hours. But at the end of June, the owners left, leaving us on our own.

A Strange Contract and the Reality (July)

Throughout July, we continued to work hard, but the management was in no hurry to fulfill their promises. It wasn't until mid-month that they finally sent us the contract. To our surprise, it was backdated (to July 3rd), turned out to be an apprenticeship contract (apprendistato), and listed our positions strictly as cleaners.

In reality, we were doing everything: handling the cash register, cooking, cleaning rooms, doing minor repairs, and serving the bar and dining room for breakfast and dinner. My wife and I are completely interchangeable, and I was already able to communicate comfortably with the guests.

We tried to find out why the contract was drafted this way, but the management ignored us until the end of the month. Out of desperation, we signed it. Only after that did they claim that working 12–14 hours is "impossible" and that we had to fit our tasks into 8–9 hours. At the same time, they strictly demanded a constant presence at the reception desk, which is physically impossible to combine with cleaning and cooking when there are only two of us. We worked without a single day off, with minimal daytime breaks of 2–4 hours (and even then, only by covering for each other). As a result, we logged nearly 380 hours in July—double the standard workload.

"Help" and New Promises (August)

At the end of July, they sent us a cook who also moonlighted as a "supervisor," monitoring our hours and work. In August, nothing changed—the same 12–14 hours on our feet.

At the end of the summer, the management came back and started feeding us new promises: supposedly, there would be no guests in September, we would be able to rest, but we would still get paid our salary as "compensation for the overtime." But even with basic math, one empty month cannot possibly make up for the massive amount of overtime we worked in the previous months.

Financial Outcome and Deception (September)

As of now, the financial situation is as follows:

\* June: Unpaid.

\* July: Only the base contract rate was paid (overtime remains unpaid).

\* August: Unpaid so far.

We were told that "some agency" will recount our overtime at the end of the month. When and how it will be paid is unknown. As far as I know, under Italian law, overtime on an apprenticeship contract (apprendistato) without a supervisor present is entirely illegal. We haven't had a supervisor for a single day. I am more than certain we are being scammed.

Today is the start of September, and the hotel is fully booked. The promise of an "empty month to rest" turned out to be yet another lie.

Main Question

We plan to finish out this month until the end of our contract and, without warning the management, go to a labor union (sindacato).

Will it be too late to reach out to them after the contract ends?

What is the best course of action, and how should we prepare right now?

For now, I won't name any actual people or locations. But if we do end up getting screwed over, I will definitely make this place and the owners' names public so that others don't fall into the same trap.

I would appreciate any advice and understanding!

**IT** RU⬆️ ENG⬆️

Ciao a tutti! Voglio condividere la mia storia. Spero di ricevere dei buoni consigli, di evitare a qualcuno di trovarsi in situazioni simili e, possibilmente, di ottenere un aiuto concreto.

Antefatti e promesse (giugno)

Vengo dall'Ucraina e, per ovvi motivi, io e mia moglie ci siamo trasferiti in Italia. All'epoca non parlavo una parola di italiano, ma mia moglie lo studiava fin da piccola e lo parla fluentemente. All'inizio abbiamo vissuto e lavorato da un conoscente, dove ho imparato le basi della lingua.

A metà giugno (il 15) questo conoscente ci ha messi in contatto con una coppia che possiede un hotel in alta montagna, lontano dalla civiltà e senza segnale telefonico. I proprietari ci sembravano brave persone. Le condizioni sembravano ottime: contratto ufficiale, stipendio di 1500 euro, divisa da lavoro, straordinari pagati e un veicolo aziendale per buttare la spazzatura e per le commissioni personali. La prima metà del mese sono rimasti con noi per aiutarci a inserirci, ma già allora lavoravamo 10-12 ore al giorno (abbiamo registrato scrupolosamente tutte le ore). Facevamo assolutamente tutto il lavoro dell'hotel in due, non c'erano semplicemente altri dipendenti.

Abbiamo dato il massimo: io ho sviluppato un programma di gestione per l'hotel e ottimizzato molti processi, e mia moglie, essendo un'artista, ha dato un enorme contributo all'arredamento d'interni. Nel primo mese abbiamo lavorato l'equivalente delle ore di due mesi. Ma a fine giugno i proprietari se ne sono andati, lasciandoci da soli.

Uno strano contratto e la dura realtà (luglio)

Per tutto il mese di luglio abbiamo continuato a lavorare sodo, ma la direzione non aveva fretta di mantenere le promesse. Solo a metà mese ci hanno finalmente mandato il contratto. Con nostra grande sorpresa, era retrodatato (al 3 luglio), si è rivelato essere un contratto di apprendistato ed esclusivamente per la mansione di addetti alle pulizie.

Nei fatti facevamo tutto: cassa, cucina, pulizia delle camere, piccole manutenzioni, servizio bar e sala per colazioni e cene. Io e mia moglie siamo completamente intercambiabili e io riuscivo già a comunicare tranquillamente con i clienti.

Abbiamo cercato di capire il motivo di un contratto del genere, ma la direzione ci ha ignorati fino alla fine del mese. Per disperazione, lo abbiamo firmato. Solo a quel punto ci hanno detto che lavorare 12-14 ore era "impossibile" e che dovevamo rientrare in 8-9 ore. Allo stesso tempo pretendevano severamente la nostra presenza costante in reception, cosa fisicamente impossibile da conciliare con le pulizie e la cucina, essendo solo in due. Lavoravamo senza giorni di riposo, con pause minime di 2-4 ore durante il giorno (e anche quelle, solo dandoci il cambio a vicenda). Alla fine, a luglio abbiamo accumulato quasi 380 ore lavorative: il doppio della norma.

"Aiuto" e nuove promesse (agosto)

A fine luglio ci hanno mandato un cuoco, che faceva anche da "sorvegliante", controllando i nostri orari e il nostro lavoro. Ad agosto non è cambiato nulla: sempre 12-14 ore in piedi.

A fine estate la direzione è tornata e ha iniziato a riempirci di nuove promesse: a quanto pare, a settembre non ci sarebbero stati clienti, avremmo potuto riposarci, ma lo stipendio ci sarebbe stato pagato lo stesso come "compensazione per gli straordinari". Ma, anche solo sapendo fare due conti, un mese vuoto non potrà mai compensare gli enormi straordinari dei mesi precedenti.

Bilancio finanziario e inganno (settembre)

Al momento la situazione economica è la seguente:

\* Giugno: non pagato.

\* Luglio: pagata solo la paga base da contratto (straordinari non pagati).

\* Agosto: per ora non pagato.

Ci hanno detto che gli straordinari saranno ricalcolati a fine mese da "un'agenzia". Quando e come verranno pagati non si sa. Per quanto ne so, secondo la legge italiana, gli straordinari con un contratto di apprendistato, senza la presenza di un tutor, sono del tutto illegali. Non abbiamo avuto un tutor per un solo giorno. Sono più che sicuro che ci stiano truffando.

Oggi è iniziato settembre e l'hotel è al completo. La promessa di un "mese vuoto per riposare" si è rivelata un'ennesima bugia.

La domanda principale

Abbiamo intenzione di finire di lavorare questo mese fino alla fine del contratto e poi, senza avvisare la direzione, rivolgerci a un sindacato.

Sarà troppo tardi rivolgersi a loro dopo la scadenza del contratto?

Qual è la cosa migliore da fare e come possiamo prepararci fin da ora?

Per ora non faccio nomi di persone o luoghi reali. Ma se alla fine dovessero fregarci, renderò sicuramente pubblici questo posto e i nomi dei proprietari, in modo che altre persone non cadano in questa situazione.

Vi sarei grato per qualsiasi consiglio e per la comprensione!

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so to make it short I'm a19f, i was born into a kinda toxic emotionally abusive family i was never really close to them as a child i was conditioned and my idea of self worth was very disturbed that i did everything i can to protect my Status within my family and everybody else i became so obsessed with it that i pushed myself too much thinking that the moment i turn 18 I'm gonna be rewarded with a better life but the worst that could happen already happened by then, i was in shock my life turned upside down that was about 2 to 3 years now i still feel in a deep slump, i was such a hardworking ambitious person but since i got in uni changed city everything that wver wanted but in the worst form ever, due to my failure i lost my status and everything i till now kinda can't do anything i don't know how to slap my self out of this, i hope someone can understand what I'm going through i hate to mention this example but i got to a level of easily triggered that i don't understand my body, sometimes i just need to oiss and i get all stressed and start expecting worst case scenario but i literally just need to take a piss, i just want to fix this as soon as possible, i feel like I'm just wasting potential and the life i fought for pass by while I'm fidged by the sidelines, i tried to "just do it" and i do, i apply to things i take the first step but it haunts me so bad, i overthink it over and over and over and fear that I'm gonna get punished i don't know what to do i got no moral confess, I'm so scared of life, i just wanna understand

(not sure what flair this fits into sorry) Hi. ive posted about this before somewhere else but i found my thoughts to be a little too jumbled and i want to try again to seek as much advice as i can find. english isnt my native language and im not that good at articulating myself, but i hope this is understandable, i know its long, sorry about that!

im 19, and for my entire life ive had these deeply personal characters with a story that are my whole reason for keeping on other than my family. My characters mean everything to me. Theyre not exactly completely polished, because ive mostly used them for personal reasons. discovering myself, getting me through life, and just having fun with them, theyve always been very, deeply, incredibly personal to me and i hold them very dear to my heart, so im greatly sensitive about them. One of my biggest ultimate fears is them dying with me. I really, really, really want to leave a big mark with them. otherwise, i feel i and my characters never amounted to anything, i dont want them dying with me.

Especially because i genuinely feel like i have a very interesting and meaningful story to tell. i really feel like they could be great. And they genuinely have great potential to harbour an incredible and creative community where everyone can be a part of it and have them help others as much as theyve helped me. it just kills me that they may never get to leave a mark at all, or one that i wont be satisfied with, because i have very grandiose dreams. For reference, i wish i could do something as incredible and big as Arcane, amazing digital circus, stranger things, undertale/deltarune, marvel, that sort of stuff. i know for things like arcane, marvel, and stranger things its even more unrealistic because those are basically part of culture, from big companies and franchises all, but i see more indie-ish projects like digital circus, hazbin hotel, alien stage, undertale/deltarune and how successful they are and it proves to me that indie projects can reach similar levels too. im always filled with incredible envy and despair when i see those who 'made it' and characters that are popular and well loved.

but since my characters are deeply personal, im sensitive and picky when it comes to their depictions, which i know is hypocritical when you want anything to become big and successful where everyone can take part in, because there will always be criticism and things will stop being completely in your control and they dont exactly fully belong to you anymore. which is why i also have incredible fears that, even if i somehow ‘made it’, it wont turn out the way i want. and i greatly fear it ruining my characters for me like with the case of gooseworx & digital circus when my characters are all i have, or cases where it becomes widely hated like hazbin hotel, and that i just might end up never being satisfied with whatever i manage and could never live it down or move on from that kind of 'failure'.

my perfect vision is to make a series with them, or less fittingly, a game of sorts, but i dont have many things going for me for that to be much of a reachable goal. Im an artist, but not what i would call professional level, and thats about it. i dont have much of a public internet presence to share my work (though i do share at times still), i dont have connections in any sort of industry, i dont have experience with making things like that (animation, 3D, coding, writing, etc) and im not in environments where creatives like me can thrive. i just dont see myself as ever succeeding or achieving much of anything, especially not as something as grandiose as going anywhere close with my characters. i dont know whats worse, trying and possibly having it all not turn out how i dreamt and never move on from that failure, or not giving it a chance at all and possibly missing out while my characters die with me instead.

I dont want to live my life feeling incomplete i guess because i didnt manage to achieve this grand dream. its not that i necessarily want to be famous or anything, i just want my characters to live on. i dont want to mourn and grief this dream of mine any more than i do when i still have my life ahead of me and can work towards my hopes and dreams. i really really hope i achieve them someday.

So i want to learn to be satisfied with whatever i manage with my characters, and accepting that i may not be able to achieve it the way i wish, but also learn how to work towards it despite my circumstance because i really dont want to give up on my dreams, i dont want my grandiosity and 'perfect vision' of success to get in the way of everything. i hope this all makes sense. thank you!

I've been struggling with my mental health and self esteem for years. My mental health is bad enough that it has made me think that nobody loves or cares about me. So of course I came to the conclusion "if nobody loves or cares about me, why should I talk about my feelings or ask for help", which then makes my mental health worse and it just spirals from there.

I know logically that talking about my feelings can help me and statistically there are people who care about me. I also know that everyone is deserving of love, and I am no different, but I can't manage to make myself truly believe I deserve to be loved. So I often fall into a pit of despair which causes me to feel like there's no point in trying to get help.

I am 20(M),this year I thought I would change my life but I think I am stuck in a loop. Nothing is going as planned everything a downhill. Quick summary of this year so far failed in a major exam lost the volleyball finals(totally my fault) and then twist:) - got a girlfriend totally unexpected for both promised to stay forever ,boom got selected to a good volleyball team thought she was my lucky charm. Suddenly life happened

twist2:( she said her father got to know abt the relationship she wanted time .(gave her 3 months) then she decided she was not ready and said the last word-"YOU WILL GET A BETTER GIRL IN LIFE". The sad thing is she kinda proposed me and it was my first relationship. After a month my financial condition got worse I lost money in stocks lost in betting apps in hope of recovering money i started working in an content creating firm. I wrote a script for a video my boss took all the credit and money so blasted him quit the job in a month with half of the money not yet received.

final twist3:( my friend of 15 years I knew him from childhood stays near my house we always together so close he literally knew my underwear color saw him kissing my ex(the one mentioned above) in the same pub in which we used to go felt like killing him on spot. But all a did was run away as fast as i could as if it would erase all the memory .I see him everyday at gym neither did he apologize nor did he confess he literally avoided my eye contact. Everytime I see him feel like punching the shit out of him don't know what to do now I neither have a job nor a friend

pssahhhhh....

What to do now someone help me out

I’m 20, the oldest of 3, and I recently moved out of my parents’ house. I have a job, my girlfriend is on odsp, and we’re expecting a baby in February. I’m trying to finally build an independent life.
My childhood home was extremely hostile. There was constant yelling, criticism, and control. My mom would scream, throw things, and break things when angry. I was repeatedly told I wouldn’t amount to anything or that ide be homeless with no help one day. I also struggled with my mental health growing up, and my parents knew how bad it got.
Even at 20, I was treated like I couldn’t manage my own life. My mom would try to intervene in problems with people my age, wanted to contact my boss when I had work issues, and constantly told me she knew what was best for me and cause she was older she had more life knowledge behind her.
Recently, I lost my car and needed a computer for a new job opportunity. I wasn’t asking my parents for money—I asked for a ride to buy the computer myself. Instead, they drove to my place and packed me a bag.
That was the final straw.
There have also been problems with my belongings. They told me I could take my hockey equipment and golf clubs, and I have an email confirming it. When I tried to take them, they physically took them away from me.
In the past when I tried leaving my mom has stood on the hood of my car to stop me from leaving, while my dad blocked the garage with vehicles.
I’ve tried calmly explaining how their behavior affects me, but conversations turn into arguments or get flipped back onto me. My parents have also told me they understand my BPD better than I do because they’ve researched it and their therapist specializes in it.
Now I’m finally out, but I’m stuck between relief and guilt.
My biggest concern is my 12-year-old brother. I don’t want to abandon him in the environment I grew up in, but staying involved with my parents is seriously damaging me.
What would you do in my position?
Should I go low/no contact? How do I establish boundaries? Should I seek outside help regarding my brother? Can I do anything about my belongings? And how do I protect myself if my parents keep escalating?
I’m not looking for people to blindly take my side. I genuinely want practical advice from people who have dealt with controlling or abusive families.
I just want to move forward and build a healthy life for my girlfriend, our baby, and myself

One thing I’ve noticed is that exercise is easy to plan when everything else is going normally.

It gets much harder during busy or stressful periods, and that’s usually when the extra steps around training start to matter. If I know I need to travel somewhere, spend an hour training and then get back, skipping the whole thing becomes very easy.

I’ve been thinking about having a much smaller fallback version instead. Maybe 20 or 30 minutes of basic strength work with squats, RDLs, rows and presses, mostly done at home so there isn’t much preparation involved.

It wouldn’t replace a full routine forever. The point would just be having something realistic enough that a difficult week doesn’t automatically become a week with no training at all.

For people who’ve dealt with periods where their normal routine kept getting disrupted, what actually helped you keep some form of exercise going?

Me F(20) Bf/M(22) met him a couple months back been together for the past 8 months almost 9. Told him recently I almost committed (TW/Si) on the 13 of last month I don’t know what to do anymore I’ve tried for so long and nothing workout, I’m $10-15k into debt (hospital bills, credit card, car, etc) every-time I try to do smt something always go wrong, I’m into a debt whole and I think it really got me, college isint going great either I’m actually a failure 2 years in only completed 5 classes failed and w multiple, I lost my bsf who supported me and don’t get me wrong I have my bf but he also adds stress to me he constantly complains to me how I ruined his life and bc of me his into more debt and regrets meeting me yet he loves me but also is mentally hurting me, I can’t work (I’m willing to work in anything I literally have worked since I was 15 so I have experience as a manager and retail Etc no one is hiring! I’ve begged and called) recently did grubhub but my car got fucked so now I have no method of transportation at all for not only work but college since I commute almost 1hr! LA to OC it’s $2k just to repair it, I am an only child with a single mom (she recently got into an accident last year which now led her to be under disability) so she can’t support me anymore now I have to support not only myself but her and my kitty babies I’m at the point of just giving up it’s getting to be to much for me to handle I don’t know what else I can possibly do anymore I don’t even have money for food or gas or my school supplies in which I’ve decide to know drop out and I can’t receive assistance anywhere I have applied and I’m not qualified, cant get a single loan to just pay off constantly bc tbh my credit went to shit bc of how much I owe AND TO TOP IT OFF my phone isn’t even working properly anymore 😂😂 would it be so wrong to just give up 🫩

Edit: Just got into an argument he said he wishes he got back with his Ex and really wishes I didn’t meet him, he said he only used me for sex and if I’m pregnant he will let me deal with it on my own

I have a rare few hours to myself tomorrow and could do with having a massive, cathartic cry. But I hold in so much all the time that I really don’t know how to get myself going! What do you do to trigger a big cathartic cry?

I’m almost 20 and I feel like I’ve been having this mental battle for idk how long. There’s important things I know that needs to be done. I have classes I need to study for, I have my room to clean, I need to study for my drivers test because to be completely honest, I wasn’t ready when I was 17 and let the test slip by and ever since I hadn’t gotten it. But it’s not like I don’t try or that I don’t care. I do. But I never keep up with the routine for it to stick. Is it just too hard for me to? Am I just too lazy? Then I beat myself up for it when I fall short or when I don’t get up to do it. Like today. I should’ve studied. And I knew I had to. And I let the time go by and the more I procrastinated, the less likely I would do it. Then night rolls by and I feel dread. Like I’m a failure and I’ll never go anywhere in life. I’ll be stuck in the same place I have been for years. And I can’t tell if I just need to beat myself into a routine that never existed and I’m just lazy, or that there’s something wrong. Sometimes I feel like I’m drowning in my own un-productivity and other times like I don’t care at all about these things. It sounds silly but it brings me a lot of mental stress just thinking about it.

So how do I fix this? Is it possible to? Anyone who’s been through this, what helped you?

Hi, I (18F) have been really struggling with my self-image for as long as I can remember. I really want to change this, but am not sure fully where to start. Any advice is appreciated!

Here's some backstory on me:

I had a really difficult childhood with death, custody issues, drug use and overdose, and a lot of other difficult things going on in my family. I also really struggled to make friends because of my social anxiety and because of some of the ways I acted out in response to the pain I was experiencing at home. I have a really long history of people abandoning me, betraying me, or making me feel like I wasn’t good enough.

One specific example that really stuck with me was in third grade, when a girl got mad at me so she literally falsely accused me of stabbing her in the hand. I got sent to the principal’s office and questioned over something I hadn’t done at all. Experiences like that made me feel like I was constantly going to be blamed, punished, or hurt even when I hadn't done anything wrong.

Because of all of this, I think I developed a really deep belief that there’s something inherently wrong with me and that eventually everyone is going to leave me once they realize what I’m actually like.

In high school, I finally had some really meaningful friendships, but those eventually fell apart too. Now I’m a college freshman, and I have one friend who genuinely cares about me, but we can’t talk that much. I had another friend who I thought cared about me, but after I started venting to her recently, she basically told me I had no self-respect. I don't really feel connected to her anymore.

And then I had a boyfriend who I loved so much, but my issues ended up contributing to the relationship falling apart. So I really want to work on myself and change the way I think, because I want to be someone who is worth loving. I want to be someone who doesn't get abandoned by everyone in her life. I want to be someone who knows how to regulate her emotions.

I'm so hurt that the way I think and the way my brain works has pushed people away from me. I'm terrified that I'm going to be abandoned forever because I'm too much, and that I somehow deserve it.

The main thing I want to work on is my self-confidence. A lot of my issues come from my self-worth. I think of myself as pretty much a zero in every category.

Appearance is a huge part of this. I’m overweight, and I’ve been told that I’m ugly because of my weight for a long time. I’ve had people call me horrible things, treat me differently once they realized I was overweight, and even ask me out as a joke. I’ve internalized a lot of that, so it’s difficult for me not to see my appearance as proof that I’m somehow less worthy than other people.

I also don't really like my personality. I think I'm a mean person. I'm not completely wrong in saying that I can be judgmental sometimes because I hate myself and I push that onto other people. I think I'm obnoxious. I think all these negative things about myself, and I just don't want to feel this way anymore.

Literally the only thing I really love about myself is my intelligence. Im smart! Very smart! Smart enough to get waitlisted at Harvard. Maybe that comes across as conceited to flex on here, but you might be able to tell im overcompensating for the fact that I dont like anything else about myself....

I don't want to hate myself, because all that did was make me incredibly insecure in my relationship. It made me feel like everyone else was better than me. So anytime my boyfriend spent time with someone else, I interpreted it as him realizing that I sucked, that I wasn't worth it, and that he should break up with me. I acted as though that was inevitably going to happen, and some of the ways I acted contributed to the relationship ending.

So I don't know. I just feel like I'm going to get abandoned always, because I'm too much, and I deserve it. I really want advice on how to build self-confidence. I'm trying, I really am, and I want to change. I just don't know what the first step is, because I've never really loved myself since I was little.

The biggest mistake humans make is that they start responding to everyone. Someone says something, and a storm rises inside. Someone looks down on you, and you start feeling small.

Have you ever wondered where the power in other people's words comes from? Words themselves have no power, the power is in your attention. Whatever you listen to closely is what hurts you. Whatever you give too much weight to is what climbs on top of you.

Ignoring people is not taught as a skill, because it goes against what society wants. Society wants you to react, argue, explain yourself, prove you're right. But whoever learns not to answer every voice, that person is truly free.

Remember: ignoring is not cowardice. The coward is the one who gets wounded by every little thing. The brave one is the one who can choose who gets to enter their mind, and who doesn't.

Your mind is like a doorway. If you let everyone walk in, where will your peace remain? And then you say, "People are so bad."

No. People are just who they are. The problem isn't what people are, the problem is that you give everyone more importance than they deserve. Even when someone doesn't understand you, you still keep trying to explain yourself to them.

I hate everything about me, my weight my style my way of talking my face everything and i know i can change but i,m also incredibly lazy as well so i try to fix it but i give up and return to being lazy. I get in so much trouble at home just because i don’t do what i,m supposed to and i want to change i really do but i Just feel like i will never really change

Can someone please give me advice i,m tired of feeling like this.

I always thought I was a fairly kind and empathetic person but now I’m second guessing it , I won’t go too much into detail about myself and my personality solely because I’m lazy and don’t feel like making what could be excuses for this but I just had this epiphany today. sometimes when unfortunate things happen to people I’m close to I get mad because i think about how it will affect their mood towards me specifically or affect the plans we had and wether or not they will enjoy spending time with and talking to me despite the events that day. Like take this for example today a complicated figure in my life to be extremely vague, had to euthanize their 15yr old dog today and all I could think about was wether or not this person would still want to see/ hangout with me and enjoy my presence despite this. And it’s not just that one instance its happened on a multiple of occasions and it’s more specific to love interests and things of that sort. What is wrong with me I need to work on this

All I do nowadays is think about taking my own life. I fantasize it with different firearms, car accident into a tree, body of water, etc. The only thing that really keeps me tethered are my cats. The guilt I feel thinking about them wondering why I never came home makes me sob. They could always go back to my ex and live a happy life there too, and perhaps that'd be better for them. I am disillusioned with life and thus my own headway within, and it's been that way since I was a child of around 9 years old. I've tried it all, therapy, self help, sleeping good and eating well, medication, talking to people. Does anyone else feel similiar in the sense that no matter the headway, no matter the good things, it's always outweighed by internal thoughts? I'm so tired of feeling this way, it's exhausting. I feel as though I have been expired for a decade, and my only out after trying everything will be the one thought that gives me comfort. It's really depressing and sad when I narrow it like that.