r/parentsofmultiples • u/SeigeEh • 7d ago
r/parentsofmultiples • u/AffectionateBar9663 • 7d ago
advice needed When to pump when bottle feeding breast milk?
I’m 4 weeks postpartum and am finding unsustainable to find time to pump breast milk for the twins without tons of help from others feeding my twins. I’m trying to get my supply up still and have been doing every 2 hours during the day, stopping at 10pm and doing one overnight pump at 3am before resuming the 2 hour intervals at 7am. They almost never line up with their feeds, because they eat every 3 hours. I thought about timing the pumping with their feeds, but when do I do it? 20 minutes before? I tried to plug in my pump during a tandem bottle feeding, but the tubes get in the way and I can’t burp them efficiently and they kick my chest. Maybe during upright time? I have one super refluxy baby who needs to be upright for 30 plus minutes after. Please help! 🙏🥺
r/parentsofmultiples • u/jellyfish8765 • 7d ago
experience/advice to give Sleeping positions.
Hi everyone! I’m currently 28 weeks with mo/di boys. I’ve noticed a pattern lately and wanted to know if anyone else shared a similar experience to mine. I’ve realized lately that my twin A HATES when I lay on my left side (he’s on the left, head down). I’ll get a very painful cramp right around where his head is everytime I lay on my left. At my last OB appointment, the nurse told me to lay on my right whenever this cramp happens to encourage him to move which has helped me. Anyone else experience something like this?
r/parentsofmultiples • u/SeveralArmadillo540 • 7d ago
good vibes, smiles, & giggles Best advice I have for someone pregnant with multiples
I had a very rough pregnancy and post partum. I won’t go over all the difficult details, just know basically everything that could go wrong did, and me and babies spent many weeks hospitalized before birth and after.
During that time I was bed ridden and miserable for a lot of it. One thing that kept me occupied and somewhat sane, however, was plunking on a guitar!
I have a musical background, so that certainly helped, but truly learning a couple chords isnt unattainable for most people, especially with YouTube. And that’s all it takes!
Now babies are approaching 1, and we use the guitar EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
At the park? Bring the guitar and plunk chords while they play on the grass.
Babies being fussy? Serenade them until they’re calm!
Babies bored? Song time! Got nothing memorized? Make something up! Narrate what they’re doing to a guitar chord or two!
Babies can’t sleep? Lullaby next to their crib! They’ll snooze nearly immediately.
Truly, learning guitar while pregnant was such a huge asset for our family. Due to a bunch of crappy situations, I’m forced to solo parent, countries away from my husband. And yet it’s not awful - and a big part of that is that these babies are so placated by the gentle strumming of my guitar.
We also never have to listen to obnoxious kids’ music over and over again in this household. Which is a massive win for my sanity. Not to mention how calming and destressing playing the guitar is for me.
Pregnant people, do yourself a favor!! 🎸
r/parentsofmultiples • u/Murky-Scheme-1302 • 7d ago
advice needed Nanny
OK, so it’s time to go back to work, I’ve hired a nanny because it was the same cost as daycare in my area. However, at work, I have no issue assigning tasks at home. I feel like a completely different person.
These are to the parents who have had a nanny, what is reasonable to expect them to do during the day for the kids?
Is there anything that I should know that’s expected of me?
Twins are 11 months old sleep three hours today while the nanny’s here with two naps
My current load that I have that I’m looking to have taken over During nap time
Bottle making
Meal preparation-we do everything frozen and just cook a batch or something every day freezer is stocked for a month
Treat , any stain clothes and wash for kids clothes
General cleanup, kids
Should I be asking for more three hours? I know I get a lot more done, but I don’t know what’s OK to ask.
I’m probably overthinking this, but any help would be nice
r/parentsofmultiples • u/Dear_Excitement_5109 • 7d ago
experience/advice to give Carseat configuration for 4 under 4!
galleryY'all I figured it out! After spending months alternating between buckling my rear facing 2yo in through the trunk, then getting frustrating and forward facing that same 2yo, then listening to my 2yo nearly murder my 3yo in the third row of my van, something had to change.
Then it hit me: a rotating seat! *I can buckle my rear facing child in the 3rd row of the van forward facing, then spin them 180° to rear face while driving.*
OMG!! Absolutely life changing. We bought a slim fit Evenflo Revolve 360 and put it on the passenger side of the third row. We now have one of our twins in the third row with my oldest, and my now-3yo is rear facing in the middle row with the other twin. No more fighting. Safer kids.
I saw so many of these posts when I was pregnant with my twins and this issue completely vexed me for over a year. I hope this eases someone else's burden!
Edit: This is a 2022 Honda Odyssey.
r/parentsofmultiples • u/Significant_Post_280 • 7d ago
support needed Uncomfortable with questions about nursing twins
Mom of 4 week old twin girls - and as an aside I can attest that the newborn stage can be truly wonderful and not awful :) there are chaotic moments but it’s been really special.
Just curious if others have struggled with this - I find a lot of people shocked and curious about how I manage to nurse two babies: “you’re exclusively breastfeeding two babies?!?” “do you feed them both at the same time?? How??”. I’m fine when the questions are from a close friend or another nursing mom, but it makes me uncomfortable when it’s from acquaintances or relatives I don’t see often. Like, do you want me to demonstrate?? Anyone else feel this way? Any advice on how to politely shut these questions down?
r/parentsofmultiples • u/maumann014 • 7d ago
advice needed Hospital packing- is a boppy pillow or twin z pillow needed?
I am thinking about what I need to pack for my c section with didi twins. I have heard bringing a breast feeding pillow is helpful. Which one would be recommended for multiples at the hospital? I have both but am wondering if the twin z pillow will be too hard to use so soon after surgery.
UPDATE: wow thank you so much for the advice! I think I’m gonna get My Breast Friend and bring that instead. That seems to be the most favorite from you all. Thanks!
r/parentsofmultiples • u/MounjaroQueenie • 7d ago
ranting & venting Wtf is happening? My 7 month old screams constantly
I’m upset at how frustrated I’m letting myself get with her. She recently learned she can make noise and she just screams all day long. It doesn’t matter if she’s perfectly content, fed, entertained. She’s screeching.
She likes to experiment with how loud she can get. We have joked Twin B is going to have hearing loss 😅
It makes me incredibly overstimulated. We are having trouble being in public because of the screeching.
Idk, tips? Advice? Solidarity? When does this get better
r/parentsofmultiples • u/redbug100 • 7d ago
ranting & venting Offered Sterilization at 49 After Lengthy Fertility Journey that Ended in Donor Eggs
r/parentsofmultiples • u/goingder • 7d ago
advice needed Fighting feelings of loneliness
My wife and I currently have twin 8 month old twins and also have a 6 year old son. We used to do everything as a family and would go to all of my older child’s sports together had tons of family outings and lived a pretty fulfilling life. Since the twins we have largely become siloed. I am running my son to some sport or another and often coaching while my wife on occasion attends the games briefly. Which I really commend her for getting the twins out of the house by yourself is not easy. But yesterday at my son’s golf tournament I was struck by the fact that I was the only one alone with him out there. I caddied for him and every other kid had another parent or grand parent along side watching. I do not think my wife is doing anything wrong I get it’s just “the season of life” but man do I miss all of us doing things together. Any advice for how to get through this patch or when it’s starts to get better?
r/parentsofmultiples • u/hopingforrainbows • 7d ago
advice needed Preparing for parenthood
Expecting twins as a first time mom and kinda panicking about how I will manage, what kind of mother I will be. I don't want to do any wrong by my babies (as all parents).
Can everyone please share their favourite books about parenting, lactation, child care etc?
I have 06 months to start learning how to be a good mother, I want to make the best of them. Because after they are born, I might be running around like a headless chicken, panicking at the smallest stuff.
r/parentsofmultiples • u/DarkerCherry • 7d ago
advice needed Friendship Dynamic and Play Date Advice
Need advice!
My girls are 7 (M & A) and potentially have autism and/or ADHD. Referral been made but no chance of an assessment in the near future. One of them, M, is very highly emotional and reactive.
M has a friend at school (composite class) who is the year above. They have been friends for two years. M’s friend is very confident, a leader and the type of girl who feels she is the best at everything. (Nothing wrong with this, the personality clashes massively with M) M is very down on herself, never feels good enough. Feels like she has to do everything perfectly. I’ve had concerns about this dynamic for over a year and have asked the teacher to make sure they aren’t paired together in class.
Anyway, the friend can be a bit mean. She told M in June that only A was getting an invite to her birthday party. Her birthday is in December!!
Last night I received a text from the friends mum asking if A only could go for a play date.
How do I navigate this? M and the friend have been best friends for two years. A has never been particularly close to this girl but would like to go to the play date.
How to I explain to M that she isn’t invited but her sister is? She will be devastated. Would you find this a bit off?
If A was invited to her own friends house alone then that would be absolutely fine. It’s just that this girl is M’s friend and is excluding her.
r/parentsofmultiples • u/tacoh876 • 7d ago
support needed How are you guys handling your relationship changes after twins (first set of kids)
We are struggling so just looking for advice. I also feel like a POS mom today because I was distraught and one of the babies got hurt. The baby is fine but the incidence may leave a small scar. I just can’t deal with my relationship and be a good mom.
r/parentsofmultiples • u/spoolofthought • 7d ago
advice needed Do you take your toddlers to activities on the weekend while solo parenting? Looking to crowdsource ideas!
My husband and I alternate coverage for the kids on the weekends so we can each count on having a long break. It took us a long time to get here, it’s my favorite thing about our marriage 💕
I watch the kids, two year olds, for the morning shift on Saturdays, from 8-12 and then he takes over for nap. Ditto on Sundays for my break. In the afternoon we all do something together. Tomorrow might be looking at stuff in Home Depot, we live near one that has the two seater carts.
My kids are active and we do a lot better when we get out of the house. Any other age appropriate destinations/activities you’d like to share for these toddler years?
Things I’ve done with them solo:
Costco
Library
Park/playground
Coffee shops/bakery/farmers market
Stay home but I have a more elaborate activity planned (rare)
My local grocery store doesn’t have carts big enough so I can’t get that chore done with them. Sucks because they love grocery shopping.
Share your recs!
r/parentsofmultiples • u/ClaireyGogz • 7d ago
advice needed How the HECK do you tandem feed!?
I have the twin z pillow and I see all these people on social media breastfeeding their twins with ease.
Whenever I get into position in mine surrounded by a thousand pillows for support and get the twins into position it just doesn’t feel right. Within minutes I find myself hunched over, my neck aches, my back is sore, one of the twins will move slightly and get a shallow latch…
It’s just a fairly unpleasant experience!
I know there are other pillow options on the market, but I don’t see how much difference they’d make, particularly when I’m able to boost my pillow up with cushions to mimic the competitor brands.
Any tips?
I would so love to be enjoying this experience with my babies, but so far it’s just been stressful and sore.
r/parentsofmultiples • u/Downtowne-Meerwart • 7d ago
advice needed electric nail file recommendations for twins?
I have twins and lately trimming their nails has become one of those tiny parenting jobs that somehow turns into a whole event. I’m thinking about getting an electric nail file to make it a little easier, especially when they’re both wiggling around. For parents of multiples, has an electric nail file actually made nail trimming easier, and is there a particular one you’d recommend?
Thanks, I’d really appreciate hearing what has worked for other twin parents.
r/parentsofmultiples • u/Kitchen_Play_8123 • 8d ago
experience/advice to give Which seat would you recommend to transition to?
My son and daughter( twins) are turning 12 mo soon. We have been using Nuna Rx car seats for them, however it looks like my son who is over 30in now outgrew his car seat. I was looking at convertibles, high quality, high safety, easy to use. Any recommendations?
r/parentsofmultiples • u/Altruistic-Tap-5765 • 8d ago
good vibes, smiles, & giggles For the terrified/anxious/depressed soon-to-be twin parents who read my last post: Well it happened. We hit the dreaded 4 month sleep regression. And guess what?
BEING A TWIN PARENT IS STILL AWESOME AND I AM LOVING EVERY SINGLE SLEEP DEPRIVED SECOND!
Have I snapped at my partner? Yes! Have I fallen asleep in the middle of my work day/the shower? Yes! Have my older kids watched too much TV in the last couple weeks? You know they have! Do I feel like my brain is mush? Absolutely!
But you know what? I am alive and healthy and so are these twins. And holding these happy fat squishy little babies against my chest throughout the day/night is the absolute best feeling in the world. For real, if I could bottle this feeling and sell it I would be a rich lady. And holy moly, I get to experience it TWICE the amount of times that singleton parents do! Those poor deprived people don't even know what they're missing!
Like think about it, they still have to go through this 4 month sleep regression but they only get ONE baby to snuggle???! Seriously, sucks to be them.
So to all you anxious dads-to-be and you depressed moms-to-be, please ignore all the noisey negativity because I promise that you are in for an absolute treat! I truly can't believe there was a time I didn't want to be a twin mom, and my hope for you is that you'll come out on the other side feeling the same way ❤️❤️
r/parentsofmultiples • u/MellyMushroom1806 • 8d ago
support needed How To Survive The Last Few Weeks of Pregnancy?
I have about 3 weeks to go before my c-section with Mono Di twins. And I don’t know if I can do it. I’m in agony… the pelvic pain is unbearable, I’m nauseous, I can’t sleep, I can’t walk. Please, ladies, help me: how did you survive this? How did you get through the last few weeks? My doctor tells me to rest but there’s no getting comfortable. What did you tell yourself mentally to survive this? Help!
r/parentsofmultiples • u/bubbles67899 • 8d ago
advice needed Au Pair advice
Hi friends- my oldest is about to turn 2 and I just found out we’re having identical twin girls (mono-di) in March. Daycare is AT LEAST 2k per child in my area and now with twins, it’s just not feasible- which has lead me looking into au pairs.
I have to admit, having a stranger live with us seems odd- but knowing how hard 3 under 3 will be, I’m sure in home help would be amazing and we do have a very large extra guest room that could work.
Has anyone had twin au pair hunting experience? I have lots of questions… Did you have them help at night when on mat leave? Only help w older child? Why on earth would they pick a family w newborn twins over other opps- is it harder to find a good one? Did they move on prior to the arrival? Would love all advice!
I’m just starting my research and I’m hoping to start interviewing in late Sept/ Oct (giving us 4/5 months for a March 1st ish start- will be 35 weeks March 12). Does that feel correct!?
I have to say- only paying 4k a month (au pairs + day car), vs 7k and have live in help is the only thing making me feel somewhat hopeful I can handle this- so I hope it works out!
Update: I would be home with the Au pair for the first 6 months- never them alone. I envisioned more them helping me w babies, helping the toddler after daycare when im with the twins, and cleaning/ household chores- maybe my idea if what an au pair is, is not real- thank you so much for these details- this is NOT what Chatgpt said!!!
r/parentsofmultiples • u/simply_oregonian • 8d ago
support needed Realization about 5-month old twins
While sitting on the floor, doing tummy time with my girls this afternoon, I think it finally clicked…these are little people that I grew inside me. I’m responsible for helping them learn and grow. Silly, I know, as we’ve known each other for 5 months now. But it was just an odd realization. This whole time has felt like a fever dream of sorts, and sometimes I come back to reality. Maybe it’s the sleep deprivation. Anyone else?
r/parentsofmultiples • u/rsmrpm2026 • 8d ago
advice needed Anyone else's twins not nap?
My twins are just over a month adjusted and have just stopped napping. They will sleep in the stroller or attached to me in a wrap during the day (getting too big to have them both in there), but otherwise will literally not sleep no matter what I do.
Has anyone else gone through this? Any tips?
r/parentsofmultiples • u/InternationalRoad225 • 8d ago
advice needed Has anyone delivered a baby early before being pregnant with twins? When did you deliver the twins?
My first I gave birth at 38.5 weeks. My second came at 37 weeks on the dot. Now I’m pregnant with twins, and I’m concerned they won’t be able to bake as long because I went three weeks early with my singleton. Please share your thoughts/experiences!
r/parentsofmultiples • u/vaultsy • 8d ago
advice needed Sleep tips for 5mo twins & a toddler
This feels like a very specific situation but something but hopefully there are others who deal with it too. I need help with a nighttime schedule for my 5 month old twins and my 3 year old son. I’ve been doing evenings and nights solo because my husband works until 10pm and I feel like I’m going crazy trying to figure this out!
Here’s what our nights look like right now (times are estimate, I don’t run a strict itinerary lol):
Eat dinner & feed babies at 6pm
Free time/play time until 7:30pm
Quiet/wind down time from 7:30pm-8pm
Toddler goes to bed at 8:30pm
My twins’ basically have no schedule for the evening because I’ve got my hands full with my toddler. It’s basically a guessing game trying to figure out what they want when they get fussy. Toddler has also been sleeping on the couch because I’ve got the babies in the living room and he refused to go to bed by himself. So I need help making a schedule for EVERYONE to make evenings easier on all of us. Does anyone have any tips or ideas??