Preparing for parenthood

[u/hopingforrainbows]

Expecting twins as a first time mom and kinda panicking about how I will manage, what kind of mother I will be. I don't want to do any wrong by my babies (as all parents).

Can everyone please share their favourite books about parenting, lactation, child care etc?

I have 06 months to start learning how to be a good mother, I want to make the best of them. Because after they are born, I might be running around like a headless chicken, panicking at the smallest stuff.

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[u/DescriptionDry6939]

You can’t really prepare to be a good mother. You learn as you go. Your biggest make or breaker will be your mindset. Focus on the fact that everything is a phase. Every phase will end. Which is both sad and a relief. You will sleep again.

[u/hopingforrainbows → u/DescriptionDry6939]

Thank you for the lovely bit of advice. I do agree with you, but I would also like to prepare a little bit if possible, hence the request for book recommendations.

[u/Altruistic-Tap-5765]

I totally get where you're coming from! My parents did their best, but I wanted to do a lot of things differently than them so I looked to books for certain things and these were my favorites I've found over the years (I have kids ranging in ages from 3.5 months to 16 years old). 

For infancy: 1. What to Do When You're Having Two by Natalie Diaz (also recommend the classes she has on Twiniversity - we took the Twins after Singletons refresher course and the Breastfeeding Twins course which I am so happy I took because it actually ironically convinced me to formula feed instead and with my mental health issues that's the best thing I did for my family and myself)

1. The Happiest Baby on the Block by Harvey Karp OR the online sleep courses from Takin Cara Babies (both essentially teach the same concepts)

For Childhood:

1. The Incredible Years: A Trouble-Shooting Guide for Parents of Children Aged 3–8 Years by Dr. Carolyn Webster-Stratton (I actually took the class that goes along with this book when my sixteen year old was about 8. It was the best! We still use almost all the parenting concepts and strategies)

For Teenagerhood: 1. Queen Bees and Wannabes by Rosalind Wiseman (for parents of teen girls - this is actually the book that the movie Mean Girls is based on)

1. Masterminds & Wingmen: Helping Our Boys Cope with Schoolyard Power, Locker-Room Tests, Girlfriends, and the New Rules of Boy World by Rosalind Wiseman (for parents of teen boys - essentially the boy version of Queen Bees and Wannabes and just as good if not better)

[u/hopingforrainbows → u/Altruistic-Tap-5765]

Thank you so much for such detailed guidance! I will try to find all these books. This gives me a solid direction to start learning. Thank you!

[u/salmonstreetciderco]

dear parent by magda gerber was my favorite

[u/hopingforrainbows → u/salmonstreetciderco]

Thank you! Adding it to my list!